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Serenes Forest: The Sitcom!!


Metal Rabbit
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Here's an episode that does NOT make sense.

\\\\

(???)

Voice: Hello, you have been exclusively selected to test out a new pilot program.

Zephrion: I don't like flying...

*the other guys wake up*

CGV: Where the fuck are we?

Fireman: I think we were drugged...

Hika: I don't remember what I was doing.

Metal Rabbit: I'm always like that.

CGV: ...so what is this place?

Voice: Welcome to the Hour of Power program.

Zephrion: What's the Hour of Power?

Voice: The Hour of Power is a new program in which random groups of people are abducted and brought here to participate in the program.

Hika: Oh yeah, that definitely explains all of it[/sarcasm]

Voice: Fair enough. Your purpose here is to test out this new system... of changing the world.

Zephrion: How exactly will this change the world?

Voice: In this program, as soon as you start, you have 1 hour to change anything you want in this world.

CGV: Sweet.

Voice: The only catch is that you ALL have to agree on it before it happens.

Zephrion: When do we start?

Voice: As soon as you're ready.

Zephrion: C'mon guys, we can change the world for the better! Let's think up ideas for what we want-

Metal Rabbit: READY!

Voice: Very well, you have an hour... starting now!

*a clock appears*

\\\\

(Base)

Fox: Are we all ready?

Kiryn: Gotta find Bianchi.

Fox: *whistles*

Bianchi: Where we going?

Fox: We arranged to go to the hot springs near the forest for a girls day out.

And what perfect timing, all the guys seemed to have disappeared.

Kiryn: Let's go.

\\\\

(???, 59 minutes left)

CGV: You fucking idiot.

Metal Rabbit: ._.

Zephrion: Alright... let's ask for peace!

CGV: Fine by me.

Metal Rabbit: Okayz.

Hika: Whatever...

Fireman: Nope.

Zephrion: Why not?!

Fireman: Peace doesn't sit right with me.

Zephrion: We can't get it until you agree!

Fireman: Well then you aren't gonna get it now are you?

CGV: ...I'm starting to see the flaw in this program.

Metal Rabbit: Is anyone else hungry?

CGV: Yeah...

Hika: I am

Fireman: ...

Zephrion: I guess.

Metal Rabbit: Let's ask for a pizza then!

Hika: ...we have the power to change the world and you want pizza?

Metal Rabbit: Yep.

Hika: Can we have pepperoni?

Fireman: No, it gives me heart burn. Mushrooms.

Hika: I hate mushrooms!

Zephrion: Why don't we just get something simple like onions?

Metal Rabbit: Onions suck.

CGV: ...

*everyone else is arguing*

CGV: STOP!

Can we all agree on one large cheese pizza with nothing else on it?

Metal Rabbit: That's fine.

Zephrion: Alright.

Fireman: ...

Hika: Sure.

CGV: Alright... so what happens now?

*pizza man enters area*

Pizza man: Here you go!

*delivers*

CGV: Thanks pal.

*the pizza man's expecting a tip*

CGV: ...oh, I don't actually have anything on me at the moment. Sorry...

*he leaves disheartened*

\\\\

(Forest)

*they're all walking to the springs*

Fox: ...

*she stops*

Kiryn: What's wrong?

Fox: I sense... that we're all in terrible danger.

\\\\

(???, 52 minutes left)

*eating*

CGV: All I'm saying is it would be easier to get laid if prostitution was legal.

Zephrion: But it's immoral! And what about STD's?

CGV: We'll get rid of those too!

Zephrion: No, people like you deserve it!

CGV: People like me? Are you reffering to me being poor growing up?

Zephrion: Of course not! I meant...

CGV: We all know what you meant!

Metal Rabbit: Stop fighting plz, we're wasting time.

Hika: What we need to do is make me famous.

Metal Rabbit: Who're you?

Hika: ...

Fireman: I have a suggestion.

CGV: What is it?

Fireman: If we made gold disappear, then everyone'd be happy.

Metal Rabbit: Money is the root of all evils...

Zephrion: That's dumb! What would you ask for in return for killing people then?

Fireman: Weed.

CGV: I'll give you half my stash at home if you ice the rich boy over there.

Fireman: Done.

Voice: Do NOT kill each other. If you do, this program will terminate.

Fireman: Dammit...

CGV: That's it!

Hika: What's it?

CGV: Let's all wish for more pot!

Zephrion: I dare you to convince me...

>_>

\\\\

(Baths)

Fox: Today's a nice day for this.

*bianchi gets in too*

Kiryn: ...

Bianchi: What's wrong Kiryn?

Kiryn: You know how the guys are all gone?

Fox: So?

Kiryn: You don't think it's odd?

Fox: Nope. Knowing my brother he's off on another pot run.

Bianchi: The water's just fine!

Kiryn: But what if they're hiding somewhere and peeping at us?

Fox: MR? You out there?

*nothing*

Fox: If he were here, he would have responded.

Bianchi: He's not at all a bad person, but he's a tad stupid.

*face turns blue*

Kiryn: Bianchi, are you okay?

Fox: She forgot how to breath again...

Help me over here would ya?

\\\\

(???, 39 minutes left)

*there's a very inviting smoke filling the room*

CGV: And... and that's why water should all be... like green.

Zephrion: Dude... that makes perfect sense!!..!

Hika: So are you convinced?

Fireman: If you're done getting high, take a look at MR.

Metal Rabbit: This whole game is preposterous! As if we mortal beings truly had the ability to do whatever we may please.

Hika: So this is what he's like when he's high...

CGV: SO.... are we all in agreement?

*everyone agrees*

\\\\

(Begnion)

Boy: Daddy!

Dad: What is it?

Boy: I found this green stuff falling from the sky!

Dad: *smells it*

You stay away from this stuff, boy!

Boy: Yes daddy...

*leaves*

Dad: This is the good stuff...

*rolls up and lights*

\\\\

(???, 30 minutes left)

Voice: We are now at the half hour mark. As a special reward, the one who gets the smash ball can make a decision without the other's approval.

*ball appears*

CGV: o_o

Zephrion: o_o

Hika: T_T

Fireman: ._.

Metal Rabbit: :D

Voice: Go!!!

*they all bounce around the room and attack each other and the smash ball*

CGV: This thing's hard to open!

Zephrion: Take that!

*summons tornado and owns CGV*

*Fireman Lethalities it*

Fireman: What? It didn't work...

*MR hops up and tries to eat it*

Hika: Lol, there's no way-

*MR swallows it*

Voice: You have the smash ball. You may get one free wish.

CGV: C'mon! Make women more desperate! Do all us guys a solid!

(Narrator note: Lol, unintention innuendo)

Zephrion: Don't listen to them! Make the poor smarter!

Fireman: You should free the laguz from slavery.

Hika: No! They make awesome sex puppets... I mean friends...

*everyone looks at him*

Metal Rabbit: I have made mai decision!

:D

\\\\

(Forest)

Vincent: Such a wonderful day...

And not an idiot in sight.

*a giant ball of ice cream covers the perimeter of the forest*

Vincent: *digs out of it*

I spoke too soon...

(Baths)

Fox: Are you all okay?

Kiryn: It's freezing! And the water's getting cold...

Bianchi: Walking in a winter wonderland!

Fox: It's spring you moron!

Kiryn: *tastes ice cream*

It's mint. There's only one person who loves mint enough to cover the forest in it.

\\\\

(???, 26 minutes left)

CGV: That was a stupid wish...

Metal Rabbit: But we're all out of it at home, and its my favorite!

Zephrion: You said "I want more mint ice cream in the forest". Who knows what kind of trouble your vague wording just caused...

Fireman: Alright, now let's get back to buisness. We were all about to agree to kill Metal Rabbit.

Voice: If you do, the program will terminate.

Fireman: Yes, but if we all agree on his death, that means the program will kill him and not us. Then it won't terminate.

Zephrion: How do you know that?

Fireman: I once killed a law professor. Then I did his wife and stole some textbooks from him.

Hika: How fun is it to be you?

Zephrion: Well I don't agree with killing him. He's an insane, irrational waste of mass, but he's our friend. Do you really wanna kill him?

*he puts hand on MR's shoulder*

*MR bites him*

Zephrion: Son of a !!!!

Kill him!

Metal Rabbit: :D

Yeah, kill him!

*the system kills MR and de-atomizes him out the room*

CGV: ...he's really gone...

Hika: ...

Okay, now we need to make me famous!

\\\\

(Forest)

Vincent: ...

*shivers*

Fox: Vincent? Is that you?

Vincent: Why are you all naked?

Fox: I guess you can't tell but these are the hot springs...

Vincent: I could stand for one right now...

Kiryn: Well the water's frozen.

Bianchi: We're stuck in here! :D

Vincent: As soon as I find who's responsible...

*MR falls out of the sky*

Kiryn: There's the culprit...

Metal Rabbit: Indigo!

Vincent: *picks up MR by the ears*

What the fuck have you done?

Metal Rabbit: Well... I done CGV's mom, this really nice call girl names adriana, and

Kiryn: ._.

Fox: He's talking about the ice cream you idiot!

Metal Rabbit: Where is it?

Vincent: The forest is only burried in it...

Metal Rabbit: Yay!

*he breaks free and starts eating the ice cream*

Bianchi: Can you eat us out of here?

Kiryn: Bianchi! No! He'll see us!

Metal Rabbit: Now I'm intrigued...

Fox: Intrigued? Have you been eating CGV's special weed again?

Metal Rabbit: Yes, but now you're in a funny situation. The only way to get you out fast is to eat, but if I do that, then I can see your "women's curves".

Fox: ...

Kiryn: ...

Bianchi: :D

Vincent: -_-

\\\\

(???, 14 minutes left)

*more pot smoke*

Hika: Hey... hey what if... if we wished that the man chickens would lay eggs too? It'll be like

CGV: Dude, I know where your... goin with this and I so agree!

Hika Lemme finish! It's like we'll have... moar eggs...

Zephrion: I miss MR...

Fireman: *smokes pipe*

CGV: Firedude, why aren't you stoned?

Fireman: Because I'm not an idiot. I smoke this stuff so I don't get high.

Zephrion: I have it! Let's unwish everything... cuz like everythings worse cuz of what we've done.

Fireman: You're right...

CGV: Okay... but first let's wait till the pot goes out...

\\\\

(In Begnion)

Apostle: What is all this green stuff falling from the sky?

Bishop: It's Marijuana, empress.

Apostle: Well look at all the commoners fighting over it. I want some!

Bishop: Soldiers! Collect up all the pot and store it in the apostle's vault at once!

\\\\

(Forest)

Vincent: Just dig them out already.

Metal Rabbit: I'll save them for dessert.

*he jumps up and sucks up all the ice cream in the same manner he sucks up fire*

.-.

I'm full...

Fox: We're still in here!

Metal Rabbit: Okay...

*he eats them out*

Metal Rabbit: See?

Fox: *with a smirk*

You know you could have looked at us and we couldn't have done a thing?

Metal Rabbit: Dammit... I forgots.

*the girls all pick up towels and put them on*

\\\\

(???, 1 minute left)

Voice: The trial period is almost over. We will have a smash ball released and that will be the last wish.

*it appears, but everyone's too stoned to do anything*

Fireman: ...

*takes it and makes wish*

\\\\

(Forest)

*all the others drop out of the sky*

Fox: There you all are!

CGV: Is that you Fox?

Fox: Are you stoned again?

CGV: Depends, did we fall out of the sky?

Fox: Yep.

CGV: That must be a yes...

Zephrion: Hey! All the crap we wished for is gone!

Hika: Pot's not raining from the sky, there's no ice cream... and MR's very much alive.

CGV: I got one question though... what did you wish for Fireman?

Fireman: Heh...

\\\\

(???)

Voice: System ERROR! 404!

Program cannot terminate!

*the ??? place blows up*

\\\\

(Later)

Kiryn: I wanna know why...

Metal Rabbit: Why the sky doesn't rain post normally? I'd like to know too.

Kiryn: You play dumb, but you know what I mean.

Metal Rabbit: .-.

Kiryn: ...forget it.

*leaves*

Metal Rabbit: ._.

I forgot to say that I wasn't killed cuz the voice didn't want me to actually die.

*fills in plot hole*

Metal Rabbit: ._.

*pees on plot hole*

\\\\

The End!

It's not as great as the others, but I like it enough.

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-Zephrion is walking down some dark alley-

Zephrion: Hmmm....It's pretty dark here. Then again, I'm in an alley way at 11:30 PM. I probably should have expected it to be dark...Wow...Who am I talking to? I feel like I got stoned all of a sudden. Hmmmmm....What's that smell? Is it bread? No...I would have picked up that "alcohol" smell. Then what is it? Hmmm....A barbeque? No....Who has a barbeque at 11:30 PM?

-meanwhile, back at the base, Metal Rabbit is tied to a stick and slowly being roasted over a big bonfire-

*the rest of the group is dancing some weird ancient dance ritual*

Fourth Fox: Tonight, we feast!!!

the others: Eiyayayayayayayayayayayay!!!

-back where Zephrion is-

Zephrion: Still talking to myself... Where are they?

*Fireman and Kiryn walk out of the shadows*

Fireman: Sorry we're late.

Kiryn: We were having a Metal Rabbit barbeque.

Zephrion: At 11:30 PM?

Kiryn: You got a problem with that?

Fireman: Also, we were trying to sneak away unnoticed.

Zephrion: So how did you do it?

Kiryn: We pretended to die in a fiery explosion.

-5 mintues ago at the base-

Fourth Fox: Let us feast!

*Fireman throws dynamite into the bonfire, causing an enormous, fiery explosion that engulfs the entire forest*

Fourth Fox: Ugghhhh....Is everyone alright?

Coolguyvaters: I can't feel my legs...

Bianchi: What happened?

*Metal Rabbit is on fire*

Metal Rabbit: I don't see the problem with a little fire.

Hikarusa: A little?! The whole forest is burnt to the ground.

Fourth Fox: Not like it's the first time today...

-somewhere far away-

Vincent: I sense a disturbance in the force...

-back at the base-

Fourth Fox: Hey. Where's Fireman and Kiryn?

Bianchi: OMB! They must have been blown to ashes!

Coolguyvaters: OMB?

Bianchi: It stands for Oh My Bianchi.

Fourth Fox: It's not gonna catch on.

Hikarusa: That's what they also said about the dastard thing...and now I can't stop saying dastard.

Fourth Fox: Guess we should hold funerals for them.

-present time-

Zephrion: How did you guys survive a massive explosion?

Fireman: Who says we did?

Zephrion: So you're spirits?

Kiryn: No.

Fireman: We're still alive.

Zephrion: But that contradicts what you said earlier. Uhh...Never mind. Tell me, Metal Rabbit did take those drugs, right?

Kiryn: Right.

Zephrion: And he remembers nothing that happened a week ago?

Fireman: Not like he ever does...

Zephrion: He may be a complete dumbass, but he's smart. He would've figured out.

Fireman: Now that was contradictory.

Zephrion: ...

Kiryn: Anyway...

Zephrion: Well... My plan is finally starting to unfold. Fourth Fox's head shall be mine and I shall have the seat of power and no one can stop me! (insert maniacal laughter here)

Fireman: That's one hell of an evil laugh.

Kiryn: Bianchi must have gotten to him...

Zephrion: We initiate Stage 2 of the plan......................................................now.

-back at base-

Fourth Fox: We knew them well: Fireman and Kiryn.

Coolguyvaters: Fireman...please forgive me for stealing your smokes.

Bianchi: As the Goddess of this forest....I give to thee my eternal blessings.

Hikaursa: Stupid dastards...just dying like that.

*Metal Rabbit is jumping on the grave*

Metal Rabbit: This is fun!

Hikarusa: I'll get the shotgun...

*Fireman, Zephrion, and Kiryn show up*

Kiryn: 'Sup.

Coolguyvaters: 'Sup? We thought you were dead and all you say is 'sup'?

Kiryn: Umm....'sup guys?

Coolguyvaters: That's better.

Fourth Fox: Oh, damn. I already payed for the funeral...

Fireman: Also, CGV, those aren't smokes.

Coolguyvaters: Then what are-

*the cigarettes explode, knocking CGV unconscious*

Zephrion: OMB! Bianchi really is getting to me...CGV is dead! I'll drag away the dead body.

(CGV is not dead, just unconscious, but Zephrion is dragging him away so that the others continue to think he's dead)

*CGV wakes up hanging from a branch off a cliff and sees that Zephrion is standing on a Tornado while defying logic*

Zephrion: I'm sorry, CGV. I didn't intend it to end this way. I intended you to die from a Tornado "accident".

Coolguyvaters: Wait! So all those Tornadoes you "accidentally" fired at me were cast on purpose?

Zephrion: Yup. Every one of them....Most of them, anyway. This is for the good of us all. Be happy, CGV. Eliminating you is the first substantial step towards taking down Queen Fox.

Coolguyvaters: [sarcasm]I feel real special now...[/sarcasm]

*the branch snaps and CGV falls*

Zephrion: I feel so badass right now.

TO BE CONTINUED

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What? I never even tried to hide my evilness and it should be obvious to them that I'll become evil again.

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there's a lot charcaters in the sitcom. We're gettin pretty full, but I'm sure we can add you in

i take it you want to be like Cormag? (talking to kaonohiokala)

Sure. Maybe Naesala and Cormag?

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oh-oh-oh!!!!!

you inspired me, fireman!!!!!

maybe i'll write just one episodes..... as soon as i haves time offs.....

i'll try to make it great!

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What, do you not believe us? Jerks. ._.

I know. People just don't seem to accept whatever they're told nowadays, but they listen to everything wiki has to say.

I know I have some proof somewhere....I just don't know where...

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Schemes

-the night after CGV died-

*Fourth Fox is staring at the luminescent glow of the full moon*

Fourth Fox: ....

*Bianchi comes out*

Bianchi: You okay?

Fourth Fox: Just fine.

Bianchi: You sure.

Fourth Fox: I feel as though a part of me is now lost in the darkness.

Bianchi: I see...

Fourth Fox: However...I also feel as though a great burden has been lifted from my shoulders.

Bianchi: Oh... Maybe you feel you won't have to deal with CGV's annoying brother-ness, but at the same time, you've lost someone dear to you.

Fourth Fox: I kinda already figured that out, but thanks for trying.

Bianchi: It's a goddess's pleasure.

Fourth Fox: Don't ruin the moment.

Bianchi: Okay...You know...Somehow, I know CGV's still alive.

Fourth Fox: Then why do I feel as though something bad is about to happen?

-yesterday, at the cliff where CGV fell-

*CGV is falling*

Coolguyvaters: I never thought it would end like this. I'd always thought I'd get killed after hitting on some gang leader's girlfriend and I'd always hope I would get killed by him while doing his girlfriend...That is a dream that will never come true now...

*Hika's dragon swoops down and saves CGV just as he is about to crash*

Hikarusa: Soon enough for you, ya dastard?

Coolguyvaters: You don't have to act all heroic. No one's watching you.

Hikarusa: You never know...

Coolguyvaters: Hey. Isn't the base in the other direction?

Hikarusa: uh-huh....

Coolguyvaters: Where are you taking me?

Hikarusa: Far out little man...

Coolguyvaters: Little? Far out? What you're saying doesn't even make any sense.

Hikarusa: Far out...

-present time, at the base-

*Bianchi is waiting in Metal Rabbit's room*

Bianchi: ...

*Hikarusa shows up*

Hikarusa: Hello Bianchi, o'Goddess of the universe.... *muttering*I really hate my life...

Bianchi: What was that?

Hikarusa: Nothing.

Bianchi: Do you have CGV?

Hikarusa: Yup. He's all bound and gagged just like you asked, o' goddess of the universe.

Bianchi: Good.

Hikarusa: What makes you think we can pull this off?

Bianchi: We have Big Brother on our side?

Hikarusa: The Big Brother?!

Bianchi: Yes. He is and has been on our side the whole time...

Hikarusa: Why tell me just now?

Bianchi: Because...You weren't supposed to know at all. But since I'm so generous and kind, I told you and you don't even have to pay the death penalty.

Hikarusa: It's a real...honor.

Bianchi: Let us go. It is time to intiate Part 1 of Bianchi's Ultimate Uber Awesomely Magnificent Plan to Rule All of the Universe. Or BUUAMPTRAOTU for short.

Hikarusa: Umm...How do you spell that?

Bianchi: Dunno.

Hikarusa: Also. Why are we hiding in MR's room?

Bianchi: No one ever dares enter this room.

Hikarusa: What about MR?

Bianchi: Don't worry. He's off chasing some cursed bow in Gallia.

Hikarusa: Why?

Bianchi: No time for more questions. We must go and intitate Part 1 of BUUAMPTRAOTU.

-at the lake in the forest-

Zephrion: Do you have the fire tomes and staves?

Fireman: Of course.

Zephrion: Are the laguz ready?

Kiryn: As always.

Zephrion: Then let us-

*loud farting sound in the distance*

Kiryn: Uhhh...That wasn't me.

Zephrion: Let's go check it out.

-in front of the base-

(Bianchi, Vincent, and Hikarusa are standing on a large stage)

(Fourth Fox, Metal Rabbit, Zephrion, Kiryn, and Fireman are staring at them)

Metal Rabbit: I'm back from Gallia! What's going on?

Bianchi: Behold! Your goddess of the universe has some interesting news for you! Hikarusa's dragon has the body of CGV on his back and he's very much alive!

Coolguyvaters: Uunnhhhh.....

Fourth Fox: What?!

Zephrion: I SWEAR I THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD!!!

Bianchi: Well you thought wrong.

Fourth Fox: Are you gonna give him back?

Bianchi: No. You see...Humans...they are cursed to live life with the false hope that nothing bad would ever happen to them. They experience brief moments of joy and then they fall and fall and fall into a pit of endless despair. They promise peace but instead bring about war. I plan on liberating them of this horrible lifestyle! I shall remake the world so that there is nothing but peace and happiness!

Zephrion: Hikarusa's on Bianchi's side again? I should have known by the fifth or sixth time he betrayed us....

Hikarusa: I got bored, so I changed sides. You got a problem with that you dastard?

Metal Rabbit: You too Big Brother?

Vincent: I can no longer tolerate you humans-

Metal Rabbit: I'm not human! I'm a rabbit!

Kiryn: I'm not human. I'm some branded thing.

Fireman: I'm not human. I'm a lawyer.

Kiryn: Really?

Fireman: Only on Wednesdays...

Vincent: The point is...I'm fed up with you humans desecrating my sacred forest over and over.

Metal Rabbit: But it's fun...

Vincent: Nevertheless, if Bianchi plans to bring peace to this forsaken world and keep my forest intact, then I shall do all in my power to aid her.

Fourth Fox: What are you planning to do with CGV, Bianchi?

Bianchi: I'll give you two choices. Choice A: I return CGV to you and you abdicate rule of your throne to me. You guys are then banished from Tellius to live the rest of your life.

Fourth Fox: And choice B?

Vincent: You retaliate, we kill all of you along with CGV, we steal the throne, and then you are banished from Tellius. Simple choice, no?

Zephrion: *muttering* Dammit, Bianchi. You just set my plan back a few steps...

Kiryn: What are you gonna do, Fourth Fox?

Vincent: Whatever she does, she better decide fast, or we pick Choice B for her.

Zephrion: You know...There's four, I mean five, of us and only three of them and Vincent is supposed to be a heron. We could take them easily.

Metal Rabbit: But they'd kill CGV if we did that.

Fourth Fox: What to do...What to do...*sighs* The things I do as queen...

TO BE CONTIUED

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