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Serenes Forest: The Sitcom!!


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Part 4.

(Scene opens with Arc carrying Lyle.)

Lyle: Arc-

Arc: Shut-up and listen. We’re nearly out of time. Those behind us are gonna catch up to us soon. Just as planned.

Lyle: Are you sure that you-

Arc: Didn’t I say ‘shut-up and listen’? Fireman is already there. We’ll begin immediately.

Lyle: .......

Arc: You may ask questions now.

Lyle: How long do we have till it’s mobile?

Arc: No more than an hour.

Lyle: Shit. ......You know, you don’t need to carry me anymore. I think I’m okay.

Arc: You’re too slow for me. Besides, we’re already here.

(They arrive at the cave. Arc finally let’s Lyle go, who falls to the ground.)

Arc: Get up, we’ve got things to do.

Lyle: Ugh *gets up* You think they’ll be able to find us?

Arc: I’m certain of it.

*The walk into the cave, Fireman is on his rock, he has a long object wrapped in cloth in his hands*

Fireman: What happened to him?

Arc: Vincent roughed him up.

Fireman: Vincent? The heron?

Lyle: He caught me by surprise.

Fireman: .......

Lyle: You try getting punched in the face by some pissed of heron after your arm was nearly torn off and see how you look.

Fireman: Whatever. Here. *Tosses the object. Arc catches it*

* Arc takes off the cloth wrapping, which reveals the object to be Ashnard’s blade Gurgurant*

Lyle: Is that thing really gonna save us?

Arc: This is just a key, the real weapon is-

CGV: HOLD IT!!

*CGV, Kiryn, Hanz, and Vincent all appear at the entrance to the cave.*

CGV: Fireman. So you really did betray us.

Fireman: .....Not really. Arc pays good.

CGV: Whatever, my real target is him anyway. *Points at Lyle*

Lyle: I’m honored.

CGV: F*** YOU!

Vincent: Hold on for a minute CGV. What is happening to the forest?

Hanz: Is that Ashnard’s blade?

Arc: Yes it is. Now if you’ll all calm down, I shall explain everything.

(Hell)

Zephiron: Dude. Where are we?

Hikarusa: Hell.

Zephiron: Obviously.

Hikarusa: Then why’d you ask?

Zephiron: Shut-up.

Wist: Welcome. Let’s keep introductions to a minimal. I’m Wist, you’re Hikarusa, and you’re Zephiron. Now listen closely.

(The cave again)

Arc: As you know, Lyle and Fireman have been causing the deaths of the residents of the forest. They were doing this on orders from me.

CGV: And who exactly are you?

Arc: Please hold your questions till I offer you to ask. Now, as I was saying, the reason that I had them do this was to weed out the weak.

(Sceleris’ lair)

Fox: Weed out the weak?

Sceleris: Yes. You see those of you who have died are not strong enough to withstand what is about to happen.

Raven: What’s about to happen?

Sceleris: *Motions to his left shoulder. * See how my other shoulder has a spike? The spike from this shoulder fell off and became a living creature.

(Hell)

Zephiron: I’ve never heard of something like that happening.

Wist: Really? It happens quite often around here. Eventually-

(Cave)

Arc: -it evolved into something greater. Slowly it worked its way here and is now feeding off the life of the forest. Those with weak spirits would have been devoured and erased from existence. So in order to prevent them from such a fate-

(Hell)

Wist: -Arc-

(Sceleris’ lair)

Sceleris: -had you all killed. Thus saving you.

Bianchi: So Lyle didn’t want to kill us after all!

Sceleris: Yes.

*Bianchi looks relieved*

Fox: Wait, whether or not he meant it he still-

(Hell)

Hikarusa: -killed-

(Cave)

CGV: -them! Even if you saved them from nothingness, they’re still dead!

Arc: Finally a good question. Fireman if you would?

*Fireman gets up, pushes a block in the back of the cave, which reveals a room engulfed in blue light. Angel is holding a small blue gem where the light is emanated from*

CGV: Angel?

Lyle: You didn’t notice she was missing?

CGV: .......

Fireman: Some husband.

Arc: She can’t hear you right now, so don’t bother talking to her. What she is holding right now is a gem that can alter reality ONCE we planned on using that to bring back all those who died with that.

Kiryn: Couldn’t you just use it to get rid of the demon before it harmed anyone?

Arc: The demon is of divine decent, the jewel will not work on Gods thus it would not work on a spawn of a God. The jewel however, like the forest, is dying in the chaotic energy caused by the demon. It’s only thanks to Angel that we have been able to keep it alive for this long. Unfortunately, Angel is reaching her limit, and not only will she die, but the jewel shall as well.

CGV: WHAT?!?!

Arc: Calm down. We have prepared for this. Of course it all depends on whether Vincent and Kiryn are willing to take Angel’s place.

Vincent: How?

Arc: All that is necessary is that you feed your life into the jewel.

Kiryn: Uhh. Isn’t that dangerous?

Arc: Do not worry. It won’t take your life. Angel has been like this for weeks, and though she is at her limit, she isn’t dead yet. You two will only have to hold this for an hour at most. Unless we fail, in which case you’re in for a fate worse than death.

Hanz: What’s the deal with Ashnard’s sword?

(Hell)

Wist: Well-

(Sceleris’ lair)

Sceleris: -it is a key to Daien’s true treasure, which is locked away in Serenes Forest. It is a weapon of holy decent and in the right hands would easily dispatch my spawn in a mere instant.

Nightmare: That explains the weird shape.

(Hell)

Zephiron: But-

(Cave)

Kiryn: -why are you going out of your way so much to save us Arc? That’s not all. You said you knew us earlier. Who are you?

Arc: Heh. You’re pretty sharp Kiryn.

Lyle: Arc-

Arc: It’s fine Lyle. I am the true entity of the one you know as Metal Rabbit.

(Everyone who didn’t know before everywhere): WHAAAAAT?

(Sceleris’s lair)

Sceleris: Arc is Metal Rabbit. Due to circumstances unknown to even I, Arc was sealed inside Metal Rabbit. Clearly, his mental capacity is severely limited in this form. Arc is a being of chaos, so because of my detachment’s existence in the mortal world, Arc was able to awaken.

Fox: So Metal Rabbit has always been Arc?

Sceleris: Indeed.

Fox: I guess that makes sense.

(Cave)

CGV: THAT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE AT ALL!!!!! There’s no way, that Metal Rabbit could turn into someone as crazy-bad ass as this guy!

Arc: ......I’m not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not. Regardless, we have to hurry. Kiryn, Vincent, if you wouldn’t mind, please place your hands on the jewel.

*They comply. Angel falls backwards exhausted. Lyle catches her, wincing as he uses his left arm. Then he gently lowers her to the ground. Kiryn and Vincent go into the same trance-like state that Angel was in.*

Arc: It appears it’s working. Now if the rest of you will follow me. It’s time to obtain Daien’s holy weapon.

*Arc leads them out of the secret room to a hole in the wall. The hole is the perfect shape for Gurgurant to fit.*

Arc: Lyle, if you would.

*Lyle takes Gurgurant and inserts it into the wall. The wall around it collapses revealing another secret room. The weapon is in the center of the room.*

CGV: That-?

(Sceleris’ lair)

Sceleris: So that is the situation in the mortal world. If they succeed you shall all be revived.

Fox: What do we need to do?

Sceleris: What do you mean?

Fox: Isn’t there something we can do to help?

Sceleris: No.

Bianchi: You expect us to just sit here and watch?!

Sceleris: More than that. I know, you’re going to sit here and watch. There isn’t anything else you fleshlings can do.

Fox: .....

(Hell)

Zephiron: .......

Hikarusa: .......

Wist: ....... Wanna play some cards?

Zephiron: Sure.

Hikarusa: I’m in.

(Cave)

CGV: It’s a f***ing stick!!!!!

*He lifts the weapon, which is just that. A plain stick.*

Arc: So it appears.....

CGV: What the hell are we supposed to do with this thing!?!?! Give it a SPLINTER!?!

Hanz: We’d be better off using Gurgurant.

Arc: Hmm. Looks like we’re out of time.

*A roar comes from outside the cave.*

Arc: The demon has arrived.

I hoped you enjoyed.

WAIT A MINUTE!!!!! THIS IS MY 100 POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Wheels in a giant cake. Jessica Alba pops out, only the cream covering her body*

HOORAY! I wanted to get Drew Carey, but he wasn't available.

*Gives a piece of cake to everyone.*

You can take the cake, I'm taking Jessica Alba.

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I was involved in theatre in high school. Sue me.

p.s. I'm not gay though. I just want to clarify. Not that there's anything wrong with that though. ..........

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Haha, this sitcom is really funny......and random......and full of various plot-twists that seem to be thought of on the spur of the moment. But still, it's better than mtv, bet, and vh1.

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Haha, this sitcom is really funny......and random......and full of various plot-twists that seem to be thought of on the spur of the moment. But still, it's better than mtv, bet, and vh1.

That doesn't take too much though. Nevertheless an appreaciated compliment. Although I can't speak for others.

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Final installment!!

CGV: So, we have a huge demonic monstrosity out there, and the holy weapon of Daien is literally a stick.

Arc: Indeed.

*The Demon roars again*

CGV: How the hell can you be so calm at a time like this!?!?!

Arc: Where’s the point in panicking? We’re still not dead yet. And that thing might still be able to help us.

CGV: IT’S A STICK!!! Do you not see that?!?!

Lyle: Oh shut-up. *Takes stick from CGV’s hands* If your so opposed to using it, then let someone else do it. Standing here arguing over nothing isn’t going to help our situation.

*Lyle heads toward the entrance to the cave*

CGV: Where are you going?

Lyle: To go fight that 700ft tall gelatinous glob.

*They all look outside and see just that. The Demon seems to be more liquid then an actual being*

Arc: It must still be materializing. It’s weaker than I thought it would be. At least at this point. It’d be better for us if we can stop that thing before it becomes solid.

Lyle: I’m on it.

CGV: Wait. You? Have you forgotten that your left arm is nearly useless?

Lyle: No. But I’d be a worthless low-life if I came this far only to give up because of some scratch.

CGV: ......Give me that! *He grabs back the stick*

Lyle: Now what’s the problem?

CGV: You’re only gonna get yourself killed. I can’t have that. I’ve got plenty beating up on you in store for killing everyone. I don’t care if it was for their safety or not. Your ass is still mine.

*CGV charges towards the monster, stick in hand*

Fireman: You plan that Lyle?

Lyle: Maybe.

CGV: Take this!!

*He slashes the demon.*

CGV: ....No substance. Of course. It’s liquid. Crap.

*He heads back toward the others.*

CGV: How do you cut something with no physical mass?

Lyle: .......

Fireman:........

Hanz: ........

CGV: Shit.

*He charges back toward the demon. This entire time the demon doesn’t even give CGV any sort of acknowledgment. It’s more focused on solidifying itself. CGV continues to slash at the demon, proving to be just as futile as the first attempt.*

Fireman: You know, the definition of insanity is doing something over and over again the same way expecting a different outcome each time.

Hanz: Is that a fact?

Lyle: CGV! There! A solid spot! On it’s forehead! *To Fireman and Hanz* I think that’s it’s forehead.

CGV: Alright. Here goes!.

*He uses the trees to gain height. Spots the solidified part. And swings down as hard as he can. The blade hits the solidified part, however the demon is still unfazed. CGV’s hands however are not.*

CGV: ..........ow.

Lyle, Hanz, and Fireman: Oooooooooo

*CGV lands on the ground. Drops the stick and rubs his hands.*

CGV: Ow ow ow ow ow.

*Droplets from the demon are starting to solidify themselves.*

CGV; Oh great! Now what?

*The droplets solidify into wolf-like demons which spot CGV and charge after him.*

CGV: Oh come on! It was a stupid idea in Cloverfield, what makes you think it’s a good one in this?!? *He runs away from the wolves, picking up the stick as he flees. One wolf launches itself toward CGV. Just as it’s about to hit, the wolf gets sliced in two.*

Lyle: You, take the big guy, we’ll take out the small fry. I’m not so crippled that these things would kill me.

*Lyle, using one sword in his right hand, Fireman, using his silver dagger, and Hanz, who had at some point gone back and grabbed Gurgurant, are now fighting any Demon-wolves that spawn off of the bigger Demon, which is now starting to take a shape.*

CGV: Man this thing hasn’t done anything yet!! I’ve put my faith into it and it isn’t working at all!! What the hell!?! *he’s referring to the stick for you slow people*

Arc: That’s because you’re using it the wrong way.

CGV: Arc?

*Surrounding Arc is a black aura, in his hands is a bow that looks like it was made for a God.*

Arc: You know, the demon being this close really helps to awaken my lost powers. I even have my bow back. If you would give me Daien’s treasure please? *CGV hands it to him*

CGV: I dunno what you plan to do with it. From what I’ve seen of it, that thing is nothing more than a wooden stick.

Arc: You know, you’d think by now you’d realize not to judge a thing’s worth just by it’s appearance. *He takes the stick and puts it in his bow as if it were an arrow.*

CGV: I see. That’s why it didn’t work. It’s not a sword at all. It’s an arrow.

Arc: No. It’s not an arrow either.

CGV: Eh?

Arc: It’s a bomb.

CGV: EH?!?!

*Arc shoots the stick at the demon*

CGV: What about Lyle and the others?

Arc: They’re right here.

CGV: What?

*Lyle, Fireman and Hanz are all piled up on top of each other. Each of them has a bewildered look on them*

*The stick impales itself easily in the center of demon, which then finally solidifies completely. The demon roars victoriously.

Arc: (In ancient language) “Annihilate my enemy”

*The demon howls in pain as it implodes on itself taking with it any of the remaining wolves.*

CGV: ......That’s it?

Arc: What? Daien’s weapon still doesn’t satisfy your expectations?

CGV: No, it’s not that......it’s just.....well....

Arc: I made it look easy?

CGV: Yeah......

Arc: Don’t worry about it. I’ll be much weaker than you soon enough.

CGV: What do you mean?

Arc: Later. Come. Let’s get everyone back to life and such.

CGV: One more thing.

Arc: Fine, what is it?

CGV: Did you pick up Lyle, Fireman, and Hanz and bring them back so they wouldn’t get caught in the implosion?

Arc: Yes.

CGV; How?

Arc: I’m fast.

(Sceleris’ lair)

Sceleris: It appears your friends were victorious.

Fox: They were?!?

Sceleris: I would have no reason to lie. And since you are leaving me, my guests from the mortal world, I shall return to my slumber. *Sceleris moves himself back in place in the wall. It looks almost like he never moved at all.*

Nightmare: What an odd character.

Raven: At least he didn’t eat us. Dude! Your feet!

Nightmare: Oh. Look at that. They’re disappearing.

Raven: Shouldn’t you be more upset about that?

Nightmare: Well I would, but your feet are disappearing to.

Raven: WHAT?!?!

Fox: Oh stop panicking we’re probably just being revived.

Bianchi: Finally.

(Hell)

Wist: Of course, just as I’m about to sap you of all your money, you get revived.

Zephiron: Well that’s the way things go sometimes Wist.

Hikausa: Yeah! HA HA!

Wist: That’s alright. I’ll see you two soon enough.

Hikarusa: Wh- what?

*Wist starts laughing*

Zephiron: What do you mean by ‘soon enough’?

*They disappear before they get an answer*

(Cave)

Arc: Looks like the gangs all here.

CGV: Fox!

Fox: I’m fine. Are you okay?

CGV: Oh I’ll be fine after I go binge drinking later. Is everyone here?

*Lyle walks up to Fox, he immediately gets down on his hands and knees*

Lyle: Your majesty..........I am prepared to face any punishment you deem fit. I can’t apologize enough, nor can I atone for my actions.

Fox: Oh shut-up. You did that to save us. Anyone with there eyes open could see you didn’t want to kill us. Besides, you should be apologizing to Bianchi first.

Lyle: ....yes. You’re right. Bianchi-

Bianchi: Lyle. I can never forgive you for killing me.

Lyle: .....

Bianchi: I also, can’t thank you enough for saving us.

Lyle: ......so we’re even?

Bianchi: On one condition. *She whispers into his ear*

Lyle : EH?!?! You can’t be serious!?!?

Bianchi: I am! And you have to do it right now! In front of everyone!

Fox: ......Um.

*Lyle looks at all the people surrounding him.*

Lyle: *sigh* Quack quack, I’m a duck, quack quack. *He flaps his arms and squats like a duck. His words are monotone as he says them. Meanwhile Bianchi rolls on the floor laughing*

CGV: ......

Fov: ........*snicker*

Raven: Hey Fireman! What about us? You gonna walk around like a duck for us?

Fireman: Not even if you paid me.

Nightmare: Then how are you gonna make amends to us?

Fireman: *Hands them two slips* You can have these. Thery’re a one-time free pass to my new place of business.

Raven: .....

Nightmare: .....Okay we’re good. Right.

Raven: Totaly.

Bandit leader: Yar har ho? How we be alive?

Zephiron: It’s the pirate bandit! And those other bandits!

Hikarusa: What are they doing here?

Arc: Well we figured since we were bringing everyone back, we should bring them back to. We did use them for our plan after all.

Vincent: What of my forest Arc? Will it return to normal?

Arc: Yes. The chaotic energy will fade soon. And me with it.

Kiryn: What?

Angel: It was all the chaotic energy that brought him to the surface. Now that the source is gone, he will return to being Metal Rabbit.

CGV: Angel! Are you okay?

Angel: Aside from being forgotten by my husband, I’m fine.

CGV: .......sorry.

Angel: We’ll deal with that later. You knew this would happen didn’t you Arc?

Arc: Of course. *He falls to one knee*But I find it to be worth it. I’d be even more of a fool to let that thing go rampant then if I turned into this. *He raises his arms which are now metal* I may not like any of you. And you treat me like trash. But you are my friends. So long. Perhaps I’ll return someday. But I wouldn’t count on it.

CGV: Arc. I’m sorry. And thanks.

Arc: Don’t thank me. I didn’t do it for you. *He faints. The rest of his body turns into MR.*

Kiryn: Is he going to be alright?

MR: *SNORE!!*

Fox: I’d say yes.

Lyle: Lady Kiryn. I apologize for my actions and if I may, can I continue to be your body-guard?

Kiryn: So long as you don’t try and kill me at any point.

Lyle: Of course.

Zephiron: Say. Where’s Hanz?

Fireman: He ran off with Gurgurant once the demon died. He seemed to like using it.

CGV: Well it’s not like we need it anymore. *He picks up MR.* Let’s get going.

Hikarusa: Whoa whoa whoa! Wait a minute! What was the point of all that?!!

*They all look at him bewildered.*

Hikarusa: Nothing happened! This whole thing was just one big circle! Nothing substantial happened, and everyone’s back to the way things were before! There’s no difference!

Angel: Well that may be true but.....

CGV: Who the hell are you?

Hikarusa: GAHH!!!

(Back at the base several days later)

Angel: You know CGV, I’m still upset at you for forgetting about me. *She’s talking from inside the bathroom while CGV is on the bed reading*

CGV: I told you I was sorry! I mean my sister was killed, I wasn’t exactly thinking clearly.

Angel: I was kidnaped long before that though. You still need to be punished.

CGV: Pardon?

*Angel comes out wearing leather and she cracks her whip.*

CGV: *Stares*

Epilouge!!!!

Fireman: Fireman eventually started his high-class whore-house. Due to the extreme success of the business he was eventually able to start a Tex-Mex restaurant across the street. He called it ‘Nacho Mama’

Hanz: Hanz ran off with Gurgurant. They were married in the beautiful months of spring and had several beautiful children. However after 10 years of blissful marriage they divorced. Hanz eventually became a regular at Fireman’s whore-house.

Hikarusa: Eventually became interested in philosophy. After a few years of studying he realized that the reason he was forgotten all the time was because he didn’t actually exist. Soon after his revelation he disappeared into thin air. Before that event, he was a regular at Fireman’s whore-house.

Raven: After visiting Fireman’s whore-house using his free pass, he became hooked. Eventually he spent so much money there he had to work for free at the location as a cashier. He couldn’t be happier.

Rugal: After visiting Fireman’s whore-house using his free pass, he became hooked as well. He eventually began to work there as a janitor. He eventually married one of the whores and they lived happily forever. Awwww.

Metal Rabbit: He soon became well respected by his friends in the forest. Eventually he was picked up by Family Guy to be a writer due to his wacky antics. Though due to his high density he nearly drowned in the manatee tank and then sued the Family Guy corporation for creating a hostile working environment. He then landed a job as a writer for South Park. Though after sleeping with Trey Parker’s wife he was promoted to being a producer. He was the favorite of the regulars at Fireman’s whore-house. (According to the ‘worker’ girls)

Angel: Eventually she forgave CGV for being a lousy husband. This was only after a few months of rough sex however. And although CGV enjoyed it at first, she eventually employed more drastic measures of ‘punishment’. After a while, he began to enjoy that as well.

Sceleris: He eventually detached himself from the wall and went on vacation. After a week in tropical Oahu he decided to end his trip with a visit to Fireman’s whore-house. He was the first of many celebrities and was the first person to have a signed $100 bill on the wall behind the counter. He soon after became a regular.

Zephiron: After one very large tornado, he found himself in a place called Munchkinland. After devouring all the munchkins. He bloated to 750lbs and exploded. He was eventually brought back to life through some other means and became a regular at Fireman’s whore-house.

Lyle: He went back to serving conflicting interests. Being a bodyguard of Kiryn and a servant for Bianchi. Though he never picked any side, he always found some way to keep himself somewhere in between. He soon became a regular at Fireman’s whore-house, though never became the manager he wanted to be.

A support with Kiryn: Killed by Kiryn. She made him take a bath in sulfuric acid. He was eventually revived 100 years later. Where he was killed on the spot when the adventurers thought he was a hell-spawn.

A support with Bianchi: Did special tasks for Bianchi. After a year he died of mal-nutrition. Then was revived in the same fashion of Zephiron.

CGV: He eventually became a better husband, though now he has whip marks, burn marks, and marks in places you never thought possible. He exacted his revenge on Lyle by paying the Fireman 100,000 gold so that Lyle could never become a manager. His troop of misfits still lives in the forest and barely manages to survive. He soon became a regular at Fireman’s whore-house.

Fox: She made a splendid queen and although it freaked her out when she saw her own grave one day, after some therapy she went back to ruling. She was offered a job at Fireman’s whore- house which she turned down.

Vincent: At some point he went temporarily insane and burned his forest down. No one knows why he did it, but soon after the forest was revived and so did his sanity. He became a regular at Fireman’s whore-house.

Bandit Leader: He came to terms with his life long dream of becoming a pirate. He took his bandit crew and formed a pirate nation. After a run-in with the goddess Calypso he decided to return to being a bandit. He became a regular at Fireman’s ‘Nacho Mama’.

Kiryn: With Lyle as her bodyguard again, she worked him to the bone. Having him do near impossible tasks. Her favorite of which was when she told him to jump off a seven story building and not get hurt, if he failed he would have to try again till he got it right. She was offered a job at Fireman’s whore house, which she considered. But turned down.

A support with Lyle: She killed Lyle and was sent to prison. She got out on good behavior.

Bianchi: With Lyle as her servant again, she made him do all the tasks Hanz would have done had he been around. When Hikarusa disappeared she made Lyle do his chores as well. Though she never became queen of the forest, she did become the new dictator of Cuba. It wasn’t the same. But it was good enough. She was offered a job at Fireman’s whore-house. But turned it down because Fireman wouldn’t let Lyle do the work for her.

A support with Lyle: She made Lyle her sex slave. She enjoyed her life and had Lyle do all her duties of being the dictator of Cuba. Though she had all the power.

I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to criticize or compliment.

Credits:

Writtenby: Lyle Dayek'

Special thanks: Arc.

Staring: Read the epilogue. I don't feel like listing names.

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Niiiice!

I think I'll write my filler some time soon...

EDIT: Also lol, I'm Nightmare in all the dialogues and stuff, but Rugal in the epilogue. Hahaha!

Edited by Rugal
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Niiiice!

I think I'll write my filler some time soon...

EDIT: Also lol, I'm Nightmare in all the dialogues and stuff, but Rugal in the epilogue. Hahaha!

LOL! I didn't even notice I put that. I'm sorry. It's too early for me to be thinking clearly.

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