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mr_e_s
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Micaiah: And then I was all like, no way, Jill is such a slut.

Sothe: Uh huh.

Micaiah: And then she was all, yeah, with the guy with the eyepatch whose always "sleeping" just outside the women's changerooms.

Sothe: Oh, really?

Micaiah: So then I was all like, omigosh, those two? Like, no way, in the wyvern stables?

Sothe: That's great.

Micaiah: ANd so she was all, yeah, my sister's boyfriend's cousin's slave was totally, you know, slaving in there, and saw everything.

Sothe: How about that?

Micaiah: And I was all, no way, what a tramp.

Sothe: Yep...

Micaiah: Anyways, I gotta go, me and Jill are going shopping!

Sothe: Alright... Bye...

*Micaiah leaves*

Sothe: *Sigh*

Nolan: Sothe, Why do you put up with her constant babbling like that?

Sothe: The same reason all men put up with all women's whining. If I didn't want to sleep with her I wouldn't bother.

Nolan: I hear that!

Sothe: But, the only person you talk to around here is...Oh Ashera.

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00:53 mr_e_s Ilyana: I'm so hungry...

00:53 mr_e_s Mia: That's super! Let's go sword fight!

00:54 mr_e_s or in the vein of something longer

~~~

00:54 mr_e_s Mia: Hey, Ilyana, I know you lost your tent recently, and I think it's fine that you stay with me, I don't even mind that you need the bed, I don't mind sleeping on the floor. But...

00:54 mr_e_s Ilyana: What is it?

00:54 mr_e_s Mia: Some of my stuff went missing today

00:55 mr_e_s Ilyana: What's your point?

00:55 mr_e_s Mia: Well, when I say some of my stuff, I mean everything, I now own an empty tent and the clothes I'm wearing

00:55 mr_e_s Ilyana: And...

00:55 mr_e_s Mia: Well, you're looking especially well fed today

00:56 mr_e_s Ilyana: I don't appreciate these allegations, I don't even know where I'd be able to sell all your things for extra rations

00:56 mr_e_s Mia: Makalov's been working kitchen duty all week.

00:56 mr_e_s Ilyana: Oh fine, I'll buy you a killing edge.

00:56 mr_e_s Mia: All is forgiven!

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Also

01:00 mr_e_s Calil: Largo, ring the last call bell.

01:00 mr_e_s Largo: But I don't wanna!

01:01 mr_e_s Calil: Largo you're down to one arm and I've still got 29 Elthunders, you're not going to outlast me

01:01 mr_e_s Largo: On it, ma'am

01:01 mr_e_s *Bell rings*

01:01 mr_e_s Largo: Okay folks, you don't have to go home, but calil says you gotta get the Hell out of here!

01:02 mr_e_s *Largo ushers everyone out*

01:02 mr_e_s Calil: Alright, let's shut down for the night and...there's still one here.

01:02 mr_e_s Largo: Yeah... The little guy is passed right out, I figured he could just sleep it off here, he'd probably get run over by a carriage or something if I threw him out

01:03 mr_e_s Calil: I don't care if you toss him at the bottom of a lake, no more taking home drunks!

01:03 mr_e_s Largo: But you won't let me keep a puppy, this is all I have...

01:03 mr_e_s Calil: *sigh* fine... Just, leave him a dish of water for the morning or something

01:03 mr_e_s *the next morning*

01:04 mr_e_s Calil: Now, I want you to take him for a wal first thing, I won't have any vomit on my floor.

01:04 mr_e_s Largo: I promise! I...oh...

01:04 mr_e_s Calil: Sweet Ashera where is all my booze?

01:05 mr_e_s Largo: awww, he left us a note! It says thanks for all the booze, I'll tell my friends-Shinon that was nice of him.

01:05 mr_e_s Calil *pulls out Elthunder*

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  • 5 weeks later...

5 posts in a month, all by me.

I've got a regular monopoly going.

Boyd: So, the other day I was with this fine girl.

Oscar: No you weren't.

Boyd: fine. So the other day I was with Calil, and we were at this fancy restaurant.

Oscar: No you weren't.

Boyd: Alright alright. So the other day, I took Fiona out to this reasonably priced steakhouse, and she totally let me sleep with her because I was so smooth.

Oscar: That didn't happen.

Boyd: Okay, you're a shrewd individual, here's the truth. The other day, me and Aimee Went to Crazy Largo's big house of Tigers and She let me feel her up a bit before we said good night.

Oscar: Nope.

Boyd: ALRIGHT! So maybe me and Meg accidentally met at McDragon's and I tripped into her, kind of grazing a boob, and she slapped me saying she was saving herself for Zihark. Happy?

Oscar: That didn't happen either.

Boyd: WHy would I make that up?

Oscar: I don't know why, but you've had all your meals right here in the tent for the last month, alone, in that corner, over there. Maybe you just thought if you had a good story, you could come sit with people again.

Boyd: That is the most ridiculo-yeah, yeah that's what happened.

Oscar: ...

Boyd: ...

Oscar: ...Go sit in your corner!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Ok, so I thought I'd post one here. This takes place after FE10. Warning, it contains spoilers.

Soren: So, Shinon. I found out my father was King Daein.

Shinon: Good for you. Your best friend killed your dad.

Soren: You signed up for the Daein army three years ago when you left the Griel Mercenaries.

Shinon: So? I came back, didn't I?

Soren: Yes, yes you fought bravely, etc etc.

Shinon: Heh. So that weak pup Ike is in charge. Not you.

Soren: Not entirely. You've been awol.

Shinon: What do you mean by that?

Soren: Well, you never officially left the Daein army. According to reports, you were captured by Crimea. Later, you were sighted shooting Daein officers. Thusly, you betrayed the Daein army.

Shinon: ...

Soren: As heir to Daein's throne, I have the responsibility to execute you for treason.

Shinon: ...No. I won't do it.

Soren: *smile* You could always plead for you life.

Shinon: I said I won't do it!

Soren: I thought you wouldn't. It seems I will have to have you killed.

Shinon: Not like I have a lot to live for anyway.

Soren: However, there is someone who wants to see you...

Shinon: Hm?

Rolf: Don't die Unkie Shinon!!!

Shinon: Oh for the love of Ashera...

Soren: Are you certian you have nothing to live for?

Rolf: Y-you...said that? Waa... Waaaa!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Shinon: For crying out-- Rolf! Stop it!

Rolf: B-but... sniff... You said you had nothing to l-live for... I thought...I thougth you...

Shinon: Ugh... *glares at Soren* ... *mutter*

Soren: What was that?

Shinon: I said kill me and I'll feather ya!!

Rolf: Please, Soren, you can't kill him!!

Soren: He's not helping his position.

Shinon: Fine! Whatever! Don't kill me! I'll pay any ammount of gold!

Soren: ...

Soren: ...Any?

Shinon: Yeah, sure, any ammount!

Soren: ... *smile* No pay for a year plus 300 gold interest.

Shinon: HOW THE HECK IS THAT FAIR?!!

Soren: Oh? Are you saying your life isn't worth it?

Shinon: ...

Shinon: *looks at the teary-eyed Rolf*

Shinon: Tch. Whatever.

Shinon: Fine, deal.

Soren: *smile* It's been good doing business with you.

Rolf: Yay! Uncle Shinon!!

Shinon: Heh. Hey, kid, unlatch yourself from me.

10 days later...

Daein citizen: Hey, did you hear? Micaiah's the new queen of Daein!!

Shinon: ...I'm going to kill him.

End

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  • 2 months later...
  • 2 months later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Lyre: Ow!

Boyd: Oh sorry, I didn't mean to do that.

Lyre: You don't go around stepping on lady's tails, oaf!

Boyd: Hey, calling me an oaf is no way to walk out of this mess with your tail still in tact!

Lyre: I have every right to be angry, buffoon! I'll claw your eyes out!

*2 minutes later*

Oscar: Yeah, I'm just grabbing some seasoning salt! *opens the door* OHGODWHATAREYOUDOINGINMYPANTRY!

*2 minutes later, again*

Ike: So they were-

Oscar:Yeah.

Ike: And she was in her cat form?

Oscar: Yep.

Ike: Huh. Must be one hell of a twister game.

*stolen from page one with my own addition*

Edited by Silith
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