Raid me (The Raid Feedback thread) XD

[Deity]

Well, I suppose feedback goes here.

[Shuuda]

Too much telling, not enough showing, as usual with you.

And once again, there is a major problem with Rad (your insertion). What is a hero? A super powerful Gary-Stu? Someone who saves the day? No; a hero is a person who people can admire. What is there that we can admire in Rad? The fact that he is super power with magic rings? The fact that we never see him struggle? The fact that we never see him earn any of this greatness he has from the beginning? Sorry, but I am not buying him. There's nothing that makes me feel that I can connect to him. All I can see is another wish fulfilment insertion.

In real life, both girls had no parents nor any kind of family left whatsoever. In one foul, tragic night, the friends had lost family and friends in a monster raid. From there on, Toby and Bryn, young Broahn girls who had been nine years old at the time, swore to protect those who could not protect themselves, such as their family and friends had not been able to do that tragic night.

There was a lot of backstory there that could have been made more interesting. Don't tell us everything about the characters the minute we meet them. Try withholding some things until they become relevant to plot or development.

But that was not the case with Rad Quetz, the mercenary had come well prepared to fend off even the most of dangerous monsters that lurked here. He was dressed in warm clothing that was not visible. All that was visible at the moment to any observer was a long, silver leather trenchcoat. Facing the brutal conditions of Yvia was no trouble for him, Rad had done it before, and so the mercenary knew how to come prepared every time he needed to come here. He felt very cozy under the anti-winter garments that he wore under the long coat. The weather here hardly did anything to put him off balance. Not even his cute looking, angelic young face showed the redness that some other human might of had shown under the brutal, wintery conditions.

The white maned, bronze skinned and peculiar looking mercenary stood on top of a large boulder that showed the harsh elements of the land. With the boulder having being covered with snow, Rad had made sure not to slip off when he had jumped from the ground and up to it. Rad was short, measuring at the very most five-seven, but he made up for his lack of height with his girth. No, the merc was not fat, but rather broad looking and strong.

From on top, the mercenary was able to take a good view of the scenery that this rough land offered. All he could see with his white orb eyes at the moment was the surrounding sea of tall pine trees, most of which were covered with snow. This frozen land was always covered with snow, element that made the land's floor loo like a pearly, white carpet.

It had snowed a couple of days ago, and by hearing the chilly wind's wild whistling, Rad could tell that another nasty storm was on the way from the northern Yvian mountains. Perhaps this one would make its way out of Yvia and into Asaki territory, unlike the last storm which had barely reached the southern reaches of the cold realm. He grimaced at the thought, for he could very well take it, but he doubt it that the rest of his troops and the southerners that would meet him in brief moments would not. Rad shook his head, knowing that humans were very fragile. Unlike him, who was not human, they could not withstand many obstacles that life threw out at them.

And here is where I did a lot of skimming to get past your usual, "I love Rad! He's so great!" part.

Traveling by those means required lots of body and mind strength, and so by having consumed the potion, Rad would be alright during this magical trip.

Oh how convenient! Not only does he have the same super magic rings he's had in all your attempts to write; but he also had magic potions to help him negate any negative effect of using his super powers. How about: f***ing lame and cheap.

"I hear he is the best asakian mercenary ever," said Bryn Zenith

And since it was said about your insertion, it must be true.

time had just passed her by without so much as making her look older than sixteen.

How about: people who are older, look older. Not all the heroes need to look super attractive.

She was very pretty despite having thought the opposite about herself many times.

Ah... the typical fantasy "jealous" people; who are no doubt wrong wrong wrong about any bad things they say about the heroes.

who had made a name for himself maintaining the forces of evil at bay from Yvia.

I'll make a judgement based on things you've said to me before. These people are evil... well because all antagonists need to be evil right... wrong. I won't waste time explaining the importance of moral ambiguity to someone with your beliefs. Suffice to say it is required to make believable characters.

By the way: ever tried writing in limited third person narration?

[Deity]

Too much telling, not enough showing, as usual with you. ((Its barely getting started, what's the matter with you? Cant you wait until the story fully develops?))

And once again, there is a major problem with Rad (your insertion). What is a hero? A super powerful Gary-Stu? Someone who saves the day? No; a hero is a person who people can admire. What is there that we can admire in Rad? The fact that he is super power with magic rings? The fact that we never see him struggle? The fact that we never see him earn any of this greatness he has from the beginning? Sorry, but I am not buying him. There's nothing that makes me feel that I can connect to him. All I can see is another wish fulfilment insertion.

((Again, the story is just beginning, no need to explain any of that. ))

There was a lot of backstory there that could have been made more interesting. Don't tell us everything about the characters the minute we meet them. Try withholding some things until they become relevant to plot or development.

((Naw, not really. Its fine the way I see it.))

And here is where I did a lot of skimming to get past your usual, "I love Rad! He's so great!" part.

Oh how convenient! Not only does he have the same super magic rings he's had in all your attempts to write; but he also had magic potions to help him negate any negative effect of using his super powers. How about: f***ing lame and cheap.

*This is not one of your stories where you typically read that any magic user can travel at will without any side effects or perilous ones. And why wouldn't he be carrying potions? A mercenary can carry just about anything, and he's well prepared, unlike whatever you might be thinking; an unprepared mercenary? Give me a break, this is no average warrior. Imagine Rad amongst ten other warriors in the academy, one of them without doubt will emerge as the best of them, and so Rad is this best warrior. Glad that is settled.))

And since it was said about your insertion, it must be true. ((It is, to her, who is curious to meet someone who's been the talk lately in Vanezia))

How about: people who are older, look older. Not all the heroes need to look super attractive. ((Naw, its perfect the way I said it))

Ah... the typical fantasy "jealous" people; who are no doubt wrong wrong wrong about any bad things they say about the heroes. ((There are people like that all around the world. Perhaps you are one of them))

I'll make a judgement based on things you've said to me before. These people are evil... well because all antagonists need to be evil right... wrong. I won't waste time explaining the importance of moral ambiguity to someone with your beliefs. Suffice to say it is required to make believable characters. ((What people? All there is in Yvia is monsters, which you and the other readers dont know about because I havent introduced them yet. No, its not Orcs, I've come up with my own and will use several existing ones. As to an antagonist, yes, there will be few whenever I move on to the bigger picture, in other words, the full story))

By the way: ever tried writing in limited third person narration? ((Naw, I find this style rather good))

Aside from all those answers I gave to ya...You assume much to quick with just an intro. Just stick to reading the story and everything will make itself clear to your blind eyes. Look at it as a fog of war thingy...as you move on, the fog dissipates and the path becomes clear. ^^

[Shuuda]

((Its barely getting started, what's the matter with you? Cant you wait until the story fully develops?))

That's not really an excuse. The start of a story should be just as good as the ending. If the story is bad at the start, it gives little hope for the rest of it.

((Again, the story is just beginning, no need to explain any of that. ))

Yes there is. The fact that Rad is introduced as the "amazing" person from the very start spells out a hero whom the readers cannot make a connection with.

*This is not one of your stories where you typically read that any magic user can travel at will without any side effects or perilous ones. And why wouldn't he be carrying potions? A mercenary can carry just about anything, and he's well prepared, unlike whatever you might be thinking; an unprepared mercenary? Give me a break, this is no average warrior. Imagine Rad amongst ten other warriors in the academy, one of them without doubt will emerge as the best of them, and so Rad is this best warrior. Glad that is settled.))

You clearly didn't get my point. If the magic has limitations or side effects, then show them. Don't just claim they exist and then go on to completely disregard them by giving a cheap way for your character to deal with them. Try showing your heroes over coming the problems with ways that are not cheap or a loop hole.

And for this whole Rad issue. Ever considered making a protagonist who we get to see actually developing into a hero? By introducing Rad as the best, you've taken that chance away.

((Naw, not really. Its fine the way I see it.))

Oh indeed; because you think it's okay without any actual reasoning or explanation, it must be okay. Great logic.

((There are people like that all around the world. Perhaps you are one of them))

Personal attacks will do nothing for you. First of all, have this piece of advice:

1) Somewhere, someone is laughing at your writing.

2) This person is not "jealous."

From: http://limyaael.livejournal.com/202840.html (On author's darlings. E.I: Rad.)

Second of all:

5) Anything damaging said about the Designated Love Interest is an automatic lie. Along with not having true lives and personalities of their own, Designated Love Interests often have no flaws. The author desperately tries to convince the protagonist they do, of course. But because we can’t have the protagonist falling in love with a real, live person who makes real, live mistakes, those flaws get explained away. Anything they do which seems wrong will have a good reason behind it. Anything negative anyone else says is a lie, most often founded on jealousy of the love interest’s beauty or magic or high birth. (Stupid romantic fantasies seem to be the fandom conventions of People Who Are Jealous For Petty Reasons). Anything which might seem a flaw inherent to the love interest, like jumping to conclusions, ends up saving the day instead.

Probably the simplest and crudest case of this, of course, is the hero/ine thinking the love interest cheated on him or her. They always believe it, despite a total lack of the little things like, oh, prior characterization and believable evidence. And in the end the Designated Love Interest is proven innocent, the person he or she is thought to have cheated with gets screwed over (not in the good way, sad to report), and everything is hunky-dory. After all, a teddy bear is not responsible for who picks it up and hugs it.

You know that advice about deep characterization and working with flaws that you’ve applied to your protagonist? Yeah. Now go and give it to the most important secondary character(s), too.

Parts underlined by me for emphasis.

((Naw, its perfect the way I said it))

Again: oh indeed; because you think it's okay without any actual reasoning or explanation, it must be okay. Great logic.

((What people? All there is in Yvia is monsters, which you and the other readers dont know about because I havent introduced them yet. No, its not Orcs, I've come up with my own and will use several existing ones. As to an antagonist, yes, there will be few whenever I move on to the bigger picture, in other words, the full story))

Monsters you say? Monsters who are evil.

Aside from all those answers I gave to ya...You assume much to quick with just an intro. Just stick to reading the story and everything will make itself clear to your blind eyes. Look at it as a fog of war thingy...as you move on, the fog dissipates and the path becomes clear. ^^

Again, personal attacks (calling me blind) do nothing but prove your lack of any real counter-points against mine.

Edited February 5, 2009 by Shuuda

[Bohemund]

That's not really an excuse. The start of a story should be just as good as the ending. If the story is bad at the start, it gives little hope for the rest of it.

Yes there is. The fact that Rad is introduced as the "amazing" person from the very start spells out a hero whom the readers cannot make a connection with.

You clearly didn't get my point. If the magic has limitations or side effects, then show them. Don't just claim they exist and then go on to completely disregard them by giving a cheap way for your character to deal with them. Try showing your heroes over coming the problems with ways that are not cheap or a loop hole.

And for this whole Rad issue. Ever considered making a protagonist who we get to see actually developing into a hero? By introducing Rad as the best, you've taken that chance away.

Oh indeed; because you think it's okay without any actual reasoning or explanation, it must be okay. Great logic.

Personal attacks will do nothing for you. First of all, have this piece of advice:

From: http://limyaael.livejournal.com/202840.html (On author's darlings. E.I: Rad.)

Second of all:

Parts underlined by me for emphasis.

Again: oh indeed; because you think it's okay without any actual reasoning or explanation, it must be okay. Great logic.

Monsters you say? Monsters who are evil.

Again, personal attacks (calling me blind) do nothing but prove your lack of any real counter-points against mine.

I saw this coming... and quite honestly was awaiting to see how you'd respond, Shuuda.

Sorry Loki, but you asked for this upon responding to his initial post. Sometimes it is best not to respond, but instead observe and take in (or ignore).

I've yet to read your story thus far. I'll be sure to post my opinion when I do.

Edited February 5, 2009 by Bohemund

[Deity]

I'll be honest here. If I respond to Shuuda, its because I feel bad ignoring his childish behavior. I don't see the need to defend what I think is ok with my work. I do not need any kind of help, it is clear that you plainly want to win regardless of what I say.

Guess what, you dont win, Shuuda, because I've grown tired of explaining everything and you coming up with more quarreling stuff just to have it your way.

From now on, you can forget about receiving a response from me. You can feedback all you want, just get this in your tiny little head. I do not care what you say, I will write the way I do, and there is nothing you can do about it. End of story.

It seems to me like you just like trolling alot, especially to people like me who are rather nice. So keep your so called advice, if you can call it that, basically, its not even advice, you are just posting stuff that you want me to change to suit your little ego. Too bad, my work stays the way it is already written, I see no mistakes there. Perhaps one tiny one in grammar, and that is like 1 in a million.

[Shuuda]

its because I feel bad ignoring his childish behavior.

That funny stuff coming from the person who won't write about demons because heis mother won't let him. And I quote this:

Again, personal attacks do nothing but prove your lack of any real counter-points against mine.

I do not need any kind of help

And Lyle thinks I have an ego. (No offence to him)

From now on, you can forget about receiving a response from me. You can feedback all you want, just get this in your tiny little head. I do not care what you say, I will write the way I do, and there is nothing you can do about it. End of story.

If you were half the writer you always claim yourself to be, you would. But hey, you're not the first person to be deluded about their writing.

Too bad, my work stays the way it is already written

Not my problem; it's yours, but you don't know that.

I see no mistakes there.

I've found a great quote to answer that with:

everything will make itself clear to your blind eyes.

----------------

I do not need any kind of help

Good luck getting published without the help of an editor. I would offer myself to fill that role; but you clearly don't want your mistakes pointing out to you. You just want to live in a little dream world where you can think you're good.

Face it, you don't really care about writing at all; since I've yet to see any improvements over your abandoned attempts. How long until this story is abandoned huh?

Now then, do you have an argument that does not resort to personal attacks, babbling or childish whining?

Edited February 5, 2009 by Shuuda

[Deity]

That funny stuff coming from the person who won't write about demons because heis mother won't let him. And I quote this:

And Lyle thinks I have an ego. (No offence to him)

If you were half the writer you always claim yourself to be, you would. But hey, you're not the first person to be deluded about their writing.

Not my problem; it's yours, but you don't know that.

I've found a great quote to answer that with:

----------------

Good luck getting published without the help of an editor. I would offer myself to fill that role; but you clearly don't want your mistakes pointing out to you. You just want to live in a little dream world where you can think you're good.

Now then, do you have an argument that does not resort to personal attacks, babbling or childish whining?

You call yourself an editor? *Really laughs out Loud...and I mean LOUD*

Please, look at your own mistakes before you see others'. You have a HUGE problem with grammar, punctuation and proper use of commas, etc. To call yourself and editor? You dont even make a 5th level writer in my book.

[Shuuda]

You call yourself an editor? *Really laughs out Loud...and I mean LOUD*

And you call yourself a writer. Now that's insulting to me.

(And by the way, it was joke.)

Please, look at your own mistakes before you see others'. You have a HUGE problem with grammar, punctuation and proper use of commas, etc. To call yourself and editor? You dont even make a 5th level writer in my book.

But that's what editing is for: to fix things. And this is coming from someone who did not understand that half of my "typos" were in fact down to this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_and_...ing_differences

Not to mention the fact my stories is a lot larger than your content wise, so it is very unrealistic to expect there to be no typo's first time around. Beside, you must be pretty dumb to think that typos are big errors compared to the problems in your story. Not to mention the fact that I can prove that I have written something of some real substance, which certainly beats out your many attempts to start a story.

And by the way: it's very childish of you to turn is to a blatant insult of my hard work.

If "OMG you make typos!" is the best you can do, try harder.

Edited February 6, 2009 by Shuuda

[Deity]

And you call yourself a writer. Now that's insulting to me. (Oh yeah, I do, in fact, I believe I am alot better than you.)

(And by the way, it was joke.) It was no joke, believe me when I say that.

But that's what editing is for: to fix things. And this is coming from someone who did not understand that half of my "typos" were in fact down to this:

((Editing serves a purpose, though a good writer, and believe me when I say I learned this from school, does not use the editing system as an excuse for a poor delivered story to readers. Most readers enjoy a story that is not full of mistakes, because it is very annoying to find mistakes here and there, specially when it comes to something very important as punctuation, commas, etc, and you know this. But if you dont, its because you find your work rather good since its yours. Again, final words, editing helps to correct ones mistakes, its a good thing I rarely use the thing.))

Not to mention the fact my stories is a lot larger than your content wise, so it is very unrealistic to expect there to be no typo's first time around. Beside, you must be pretty dumb to think that typos are big errors compared to the problems in your story. Not to mention the fact that I can prove that I have written something of some real substance, which certainly beats out your many attempts to start a story.

((Ok, so you deliver long intros, chapters, etc. That does not truly mean that its better than my story or another. From writer to writer, I wanna tell ya that quantity does not match quality. There are different kind of readers out there, believe me, Shuuda, when I say that most readers enjoy quick action. If one as a writer goes on babbling and babbling about stuff that does not required to be in the story, readers tend to get bored and abandon the story. You gotta give them everything in a snap if possible; character introduction, action, world description, etc. You, and any writer for that deal, paint a world as you go))

And by the way: it's very childish of you to turn is to a blatant insult of my hard work.

((Its not insulting if its true)) Believe me, everything that you say to me is not taken seriously by me, because most of what you say does not help me in the least. Give good advice and perhaps I shall look deeper into it.))

Read the bold stuff. XD

[lolDeath]

I greatly enjoy the fact that you make feedback threads when you do not want feedback, you just want compliments, then when you don't get them you resort to your usual idiocy.

[Deity]

I greatly enjoy the fact that you make feedback threads when you do not want feedback, you just want compliments, then when you don't get them you resort to your usual idiocy.

Its good to see you around these places. I rarely bothered with adding a feedback thread, because I know the way Shuuda and other members are.

Nonetheless, I also have those that do enjoy my work and they dont come in and criticize every little detail, and so I give those the chance to post feedback. So see, no idiocy here, its just hard beating other idiots who think that what they believe is the correct way to go.

Now excuse me, Mr. Death, I have to update. Have a nice day.

[TLSothe]

You really captured my personality with this. Alexis' too. Especially how she and I interact IRL. Sure, you probably didn't realize it, but you did a great job with Alexis' and my characters. Good job! *Waits for more*

[Deity]

You really captured my personality with this. Alexis' too. Especially how she and I interact IRL. Sure, you probably didn't realize it, but you did a great job with Alexis' and my characters. Good job! *Waits for more*

Well, I believed that perhaps you and Alexis are like Pent and Louise, or something along that line. I will not disappoint you, Cap'n, you still have much to read and enjoy, that was just a scene of you and her riding into town. The best parts are still yet to come, are they ever.

Edited February 6, 2009 by Löki

[TLSothe]

Well, I believed that perhaps you and Alexis are like Pent and Louise, or something along that line. I will not disappoint you, Cap'n, you still have much to read and enjoy, that was just a scene of you and her riding into town. The best parts are still yet to come, are they ever.

Yeah, she and I are a bit like Pent and Louise... Except we're not married. You better not quit on this story, lol, I like this one.

[Defeatist Elitist]

Tsk. This is actually kind of getting annoying...

Can you guys ever stop posting about how Shuuda is evil and how he's a horrible person, you can't win against him, he's just trolling, blah blah blah? Seriously, next time this shit happens I am going to fucking well write a story, post it here, and accept every bit of criticism he gives me, and use it to improve what I wrote, and show you guys that it fucking well works. This is really getting to be bullshit here.

[Deity]

Yeah, she and I are a bit like Pent and Louise... Except we're not married. You better not quit on this story, lol, I like this one.

I wont, you have my word.

[TLSothe]

Tsk. This is actually kind of getting annoying...

Can you guys ever stop posting about how Shuuda is evil and how he's a horrible person, you can't win against him, he's just trolling, blah blah blah? Seriously, next time this shit happens I am going to fucking well write a story, post it here, and accept every bit of criticism he gives me, and use it to improve what I wrote, and show you guys that it fucking well works. This is really getting to be bullshit here.

I hope that wasn't pointed at me.

[Deity]

I hope that wasn't pointed at me.

Taylor should write a story. In fact, I would like to see her in one of mine. XD

[lolDeath]

Its good to see you around these places. I rarely bothered with adding a feedback thread, because I know the way Shuuda and other members are.

Nonetheless, I also have those that do enjoy my work and they dont come in and criticize every little detail, and so I give those the chance to post feedback. So see, no idiocy here, its just hard beating other idiots who think that what they believe is the correct way to go.

Now excuse me, Mr. Death, I have to update. Have a nice day.

Feedback is not supposed to be all good, feedback topics are supposed to be used so you can improve your writing, not just a place where you can ask for compliments. If you aren't interested in it you really shouldn't make them at all.

Someone not liking the way you do things does not make them an idiot, it just makes them different than you. SINNERS SINNERS DEVIL WORSHIPERS.

Taylor is a male, and they happen to write very well imo. I'll PM you a small story of theirs later on.

Edited February 6, 2009 by Death

[TLSothe]

Taylor would probably be a good writer. /SPAM

[Deity]

Feedback is not supposed to be all good, feedback topics are supposed to be used so you can improve your writing, not just a place where you can ask for compliments. If you aren't interested in it you really shouldn't make them at all.

Someone not liking the way you do things does not make them an idiot, it just makes them different than you. SINNERS SINNERS DEVIL WORSHIPERS.

Taylor is a male, and they happen to write very well imo. I'll PM you a small story of theirs later on.

*Smiles*

At least you were kinder this time.

Oh, Taylor is a male? My bad, thought he was a girl. Darn avies. And yes, do. I love reading--and writing. I'm great at both.

And I don't hate Shuuda, for the record, he knows this. In fact, I have said it before, I hate nobody.

[Bohemund]

*Smiles*

At least you were kinder this time.

Oh, Taylor is a male? My bad, thought he was a girl. Darn avies. And yes, do. I love reading--and writing. I'm great at both.

And I don't hate Shuuda, for the record, he knows this. In fact, I have said it before, I hate nobody.

Yea... I avoid mentioning gender related words these days, unless for a fact I can tell. It's scary when I can't tell in person.

[Shuuda]

Sorry I'm late; sleeping is fun:

(Oh yeah, I do, in fact, I believe I am alot better than you.)

Oh yes, your many attempts to write a story really prove that compared to how much deeper I am into my own work.

It was no joke, believe me when I say that.

Now come on, I think I know when I am making a wise crack.

Editing serves a purpose, though a good writer, and believe me when I say I learned this from school, does not use the editing system as an excuse for a poor delivered story to readers.

Nor do good writers resort to: "I'M GOOD I'M GOOD I'M GOOD! YOU SUCK YOU SUCK BAAAAAAAWWW!" As an argument.

Most readers enjoy a story that is not full of mistakes, because it is very annoying to find mistakes here and there, specially when it comes to something very important as punctuation, commas, etc, and you know this.

Readers also enjoy characters you are not Gary-Stus. The thing is, typos are easy to fix, once I've finished my story, I can simply go back and fix it before a final realise. Bad characters and plot are far bigger errors.

everything that you say to me is not taken seriously by me,

The feeling is mutual. I assure you of that.

Give good advice and perhaps I shall look deeper into it.

Read the first post I wrote in this topic.. and this time, don't look for excuses to ignore it.

Ok, so you deliver long intros, chapters, etc.

Not to mention: not abandoning the story before it's even past first chapter. Dedication and discipline matter a lot.

I wanna tell ya that quantity does not match quality.

Quantity you say. /points to all your abandoned attempts.

You, and any writer for that deal, paint a world as you go))

It's called, "not infodumping". I introduce things then they become important (when the readers need/would want to give a damn about it). Readers don't want to have a big long history lesson about the world in the first chapter. They want to get into a story.

Again, final words, editing helps to correct ones mistakes, its a good thing I rarely use the thing.))

I doubt you've ever asked anyone of intelligence to read your work over to point out things I do.

Face the facts: you don't actually have anything to justify the problems that I pointed out... so you have turned this in to an attack on my work (which is not the topic of discussion). A typical tactic.

Your mindset is foolish and baseless. All you do is blow hot air about being a good writer; but what have you got to prove it? Nothing. Everything you've tried to write was abandoned. And, anytime someone points out that you're being baseless or not as good as you think you are, you go on an instant attack on them and disregard anything they say.

Face it, your whole argument against me comes down a very flawed idea: "I'm a good writer because he has made typos."

This is an illogical argument, since it is not my work or my skill that is in question in this topic, it's yours. Nor does the fact that other people make mistakes make you good. The fact that I make mistakes in my own work does not invalidate my argument here.

Now then, do you have any argument that does not revolve around going "BAAAAAAW I'M GOOD WRITER!" (with no proof I might add), and then discrediting anyone who disagrees with something off-topic?

Edited February 6, 2009 by Shuuda

[Deity]

Sorry I'm late; sleeping is fun:

Oh yes, your many attempts to write a story really prove that compared to how much deeper I am into my own work.

Now come on, I think I know when I am making a wise crack.

--naw, I still believe it was no joke, knowing you now, it wasnt.

Nor do good writers resort to: "I'M GOOD I'M GOOD I'M GOOD! YOU SUCK YOU SUCK BAAAAAAAWWW!" As an argument.

Readers also enjoy characters you are not Gary-Stus.

--Reader also enjoy Self inserts, Gary-Stus, whatever, they do. Especially forum members.

The thing is, typos are easy to fix, once I've finished my story, I can simply go back and fix it before a final realise. Bad characters and plot are far bigger errors.

--Sure, in a forum they are. But I wouldn't imagine professional-wise. If you decided to go for it as you are at the moment, imagine what an editor would say to you? Imagine what it would say to me? In truth, my story would have a better chance than yours. And believe me when I say that they've told me that my work is excellent. I received a package not some days ago with instructions on what I need to do next. :) So, dear Shuuda, I am leaving the minor leagues, if you get my meaning. I'd say more, but to what end? You will just come back and call me a liar. Naw, lets just leave it at that, believe what you want.

The feeling is mutual. I assure you of that.

--Good to know.

Read the first post I wrote in this topic.. and this time, don't look for excuses to ignore it.

--I already did, as soon as it was posted. I did not find anything there useful, just remarks on how I needed to change something that does not need to be changed.

Not to mention: not abandoning the story before it's even past first chapter. Dedication and discipline matter a lot.

Quantity you say. /points to all your abandoned attempts.

It's called, "not infodumping". I introduce things then they become important (when the readers need/would want to give a damn about it). Readers don't want to have a big long history lesson about the world in the first chapter. They want to get into a story.

I doubt you've ever asked anyone of intelligence to read your work over to point out things I do.

--Oh, but I have. And believe me, I believe what they tell me, and if they said I just needed to do something else, some tiny little thing, then I believe them.

Face the facts: you don't actually have anything to justify the problems that I pointed out... so you have turned this in to an attack on my work (which is not the topic of discussion). A typical tactic.

--Not really, all I said was that you should look at your own mistakes before you start attacking me. A good writer is one who shows all of the following: 1st and foremost, great grammar, sentencing structuring, characterazation, world overview, world description, action, etc. Sure, Shuuda, you might have long posts in your story, but everything you wrote needs to be edited, and you know that. I see that you posted your story at FEP, and only one guy gave you feedback, and that was to point out the mistakes you made.

Your mindset is foolish and baseless. All you do is blow hot air about being a good writer; but what have you got to prove it? Nothing. Everything you've tried to write was abandoned. And, anytime someone points out that you're being baseless or not as good as you think you are, you go on an instant attack on them and disregard anything they say.

--No, I defend myself and tell them that I dont need to edit anything, since everything in the story looks fine.

Face it, your whole argument against me comes down a very flawed idea: "I'm a good writer because he has made typos."

--No, not really. I say that because I believe I am.

This is an illogical argument, since it is not my work or my skill that is in question in this topic, it's yours. Nor does the fact that other people make mistakes make you good. The fact that I make mistakes in my own work does not invalidate my argument here.

--That is where you are wrong. Compare yourself to me and lets see who has more work to do. *Points a finger at your nose* That would be you. lol. And its true. You have to always go back and edit something that should not be a problem with most good writers. I, on the other hand, dont have to do squat, except write on. So I guess that makes me better than you.

Now then, do you have any argument that does not revolve around going "BAAAAAAW I'M GOOD WRITER!" (with no proof I might add), and then discrediting anyone who disagrees with something off-topic?

--I think I already made my point.

Now, if you are gonna find any mistakes on my writing, point them out to me. I'm sure you wont find anything really, but you will always find something that you want me to change that in your opinion looks/or would sound better.

I answered in bold.