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Let's Rage! - FE7 Edition

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Just started reading this. Looking forward to more Bartre poetry. Or will it stop because he ACTUALLY GAINED SPEED? Also, what happened to your curse list?

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Just started reading this. Looking forward to more Bartre poetry. Or will it stop because he ACTUALLY GAINED SPEED? Also, what happened to your curse list?

There's only so much one can get screwed over before losing count.

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I cannot begin to describe how long BBD took, I hope someone kills Zephiel in the near future! Last time on Let's Rage, we recruited a psycho and didn't really do much else! Now we head deep into Bern, can we actually do something plot related?

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BARTRE HAS PROMOTED, BARTRE IS BUFF, BARTRE ONLY HOPES HIS SPEED IS ENOUGH

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Also I seem to have spawned the worst Priscilla imaginable. She promoted at like level 18.

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Thinking about it, these screens could easily be taken the wrong way.

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One does question where he sleeps, I don't recall that room having a bed.

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Only one thing can ruin it!

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Building up the hype, it would be a real shame if...

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He's already saying his prayers!

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And Nino proves once again that she's a complete and total failure!

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Sock it to her, Jaffar!

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You guys are really bad at this.

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Truth be told, you needed to look out for yourself more, you died in like six attempts.

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Cam? Is that you?

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Question, who has the lights on in the dark?

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The exit's like about 30 seconds walk away.

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And for some reason Eliwood and friends turn up at the exact moment!

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Because why not!

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Turns out that it didn't have to go very far.

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That's incredibly helpful Eliwood.

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Especially since Hector seems to forget everything.

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A lot of things happened, I hope this is going somewhere.

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Apparently children are not meant to be seen or heard.

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This changed tone rather quickly.

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FORESHADOWING.

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Truth be told, I still have no idea why I'm using you.

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For the love of god, please don't die again.

PART TWO COMING SOON, MAYBE TOMORROW.

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FE7HHM_35_zps150bacc1.pngFE7HHM_36_zpsf8eb74df.png

FORESHADOWING.

I totally forgot about this convo, and it feels like a player punch.

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that priscilla doesn't even have good luck, that's awful

I was gonna rage at the update being awful because nothing happened but the bartre poetry is always enough to tide me over for a few months

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Here's some MORE.

[spoiler=Some more]

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Wil decides to solve me several problems regarding how to kill this guy.

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Hurrah! Now I have someone who's on par with base!Marcus!

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This was nearly a disaster waiting to happen.

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This makes things rather interesting.

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Screw you too, Kent. You're like my only good unit.

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And thus Zephiel is probably boned!

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This level was totally worth delaying promotion for.

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It's almost as if green units are trying to die.

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Yet another unit who is about on par with Marcus. Clearly worth all my investment.

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Meanwhile, the four horseman of failure try to take on Maxime. Note, horses not included.

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This seems relatively safe!

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At least he's drawing them away from Zephiel?

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NO.

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This saved me all sorts of headaches.

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Knowing Merlinus, probably yes.

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Curse you, Jaffar! How did you draw every enemy except this one!

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Rage! I wanted those!

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Well, I didn't want the swag anyway.

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This is probably the most useful thing she's ever done.

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Don't worry, the loser patrol has arrived!

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Ha! That was for Merlinus!

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You took like four turns to kill that monk, I hardly believe you could do anything helpful.

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Hector knows something for some reason!

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Whilst this is amusing with regards to the image above, it's amazing how IS shouldn't be bothered to write out the conversation.

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Because recruitment! Why not!

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Yeah!

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Such an amazing meatshield!

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Meanwhile, Kent takes on like everything.

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WORTH IT.

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Wallace knows only THWOMP.

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Screw you, Jaffar. I need you closer!

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BARTRE SHOOT ARROW, BARTRE USE BOW, BARTRE NOT KILL BECAUSE HE SO SLOW.

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I don't recall Canas' res growth being so good. On the plus side, his awful defense balances it out!

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I have three turns to get Nino to Jaffar. This could be interesting.

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Now Farina can not fear arrows!

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Nice answer, Eliwood!

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Zephiel eventually realises not to fall for this trick, I guess that's why FE6 happens.

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It's a little late for that, Prissy. For the record she's down 5 HP, 4 speed, 5 luck and 3 res. But she's got an extra skill to make up for it!

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The trade chain this involved was legendary.

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Hey, I saved three of them!

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If this had gone wrong, he'd have died... but A axes so worth it!

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I'm sure Pent will appreciate that!

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Kidnapping too pro.

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Thanks for showing your concern too, Jaffar

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Hector, you'd lose horribly.

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Do you know how many breads you've eaten in your life time?

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Hector decides that he'll let somebody who could wreck him live, smooth.

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Nergal loves failure, right?

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Thanks, moustachio.

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Essentially, Hector's telling Eliwood to get in there.

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Good work Eliwood, you're a massive dick.

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And thus Eliwood screws things for everyone.

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Truth be told, I can't remember why we were doing this again.

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Sure, why not!

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Ha, I'm sure that will work out well!

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So far it looks like I'm selling my boots. I'll give it a few days to see if people feel less cruel but I have a feeling those boots weren't made for walking.

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Wallace it is! I want to thank all the jerks who decided to give me joke options, Let's Rage wouldn't be the same without them!

[spoiler=It's not an update]

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Thwompsalot ready to deploy!

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Sure, unfortunately we seem to be in the interlude between the two seasons. Last time on Let's Rage, we set up Hector's death in the future and robbed the castle! Warning, this update may trigger flashbacks in those who had trouble with OoT's water temple.

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Unfortunately I don't have any screenshots of the opening dialogue. It's boring anyway!

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And thus begins the most tedious thing in this run so far.

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My lightning rod is successful! Or not, depending on if he's actually a lightning rod!

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Thwomp level so pro.

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Pent guest stars this chapter! Because Priscilla sucks too much to use restore properly.

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Wallace in the mean time acts as bait for flying things!

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WHY.

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What's this? A good level up in Let's Rage?

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NO, WHY.

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Bolting, gg.

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Well, that was painful!

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Her inability to dodge these was Pent's reason to be deployed. Ironically, she didn't get hit by any this map.

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Not so funny now, is it?

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Where's Wallace when you need him?

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Over there, running out of axes apparently!

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The horrors begin, words cannot describe this map.

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For some reason, Farina's got stupid resistance.

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It's a sad day when a bald man in a metal toilet is the best at dodging these.

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That's right, try to thwomp more!

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That could have gone badly!

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THE WAY FORWARDS.

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Nergal is clearly a tough loanshark.

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Meanwhile, flying things still attempt to kill Wallace.

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Unfortunately, Wallace was not rewarded for his heroics.

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Truth be told, I'm not sure why they're trying.

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The thwomp continues.

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Nino might be in trouble.

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Ha! I even realised they could swim this time!

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SOME MAY ASK WHY BARTRE POEMS ARE LACKING, DON'T ASK HIM, HE'S NOT SLACKING.

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I think she's about on par with Priscilla now.

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It's also sad that my best unit is only capable of dealing 7 damage.

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Crits help apparently!

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I've only just realised how bad my Bartre is.

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It was worth it!

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Nergal prefers red heads... and scales.

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I'm starting to wonder if any of my units are above their averages.

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Eventually Hector gets there!

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Nino's entire family kinda suck. I'm looking at you, Lugh.

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Truth be told, Sonia didn't do too badly. Aside from trying to get you killed.

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He's a bit of a dick uncle, he knew the whole time?

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Yeah, especially when you went around killing people.

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I'm still not sure what this chapter accomplished other than them beating up the Black Fang.

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Jaffar often dreams of smashing his own face in too!

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Stressing words with capitals, NEAT.

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Jaffar joins the list of people who don't get along with Hector but nothing ever comes of it.

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You're evil, dark haired and golden eyed. Surely it wasn't a coincidence?

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I never quite understod why Nergal killed off his failed henchmen, surely they're vaguely more useful not dead?

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And so... the magical adventure of Shin continues...As Bartre poems come, Wallace level ups get thwomper, and no Lord promotes yet. Truly an amazing playthrough. Wait a minute... it's not here!

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