[From hack to indie] Path of the Midnight Sun

[bottlegnomes]

Umh, no, it really is in chapter 1! When the other two units (Rya and Cristoph) appear, check it out. ;P

Minute 8:10 of the first video.

Anyway it could work, but I'm still not convinced about it.

Yeah, I noticed that after I watched the prologue. Not really sure how I missed it. Try "pierce that throat." It still seems kind of awkward, but I can't really think of any way to make it not awkward without changing that part entirely.

I don't fully get what you are saying with "You're narrating through dialogue way too much".

You're telling the reader things instead of showing them. For example, Fa's line "That's all? You really upset me." Don't have her say she's upset. Make her do something to show it. Another one, "Here they are! This is Hiokade's dragonknight squad!" They're enemies. The only one's we've been fighting are from Hiokade so far. They're on dragons. It's fairly obvious they're dragonknights from Hiokade. You don't need to tell us. Now if you meant it as Fa being surprised by them sending the dragonkights after her, it's not narrating through dialogue, just awkward.

As for grammar, I've already asked The Iron Rose to get over it, but I'll be glad if you can let me notice some things in the plot which may seem a bit off. You know, a writer has clear ideas about its work, but it's not really easy to pass that 'idea' to the readers as well, exspecially if it's a complicated one. Also, I don't doubt your grammar editing skills (it's the opposite, I think you really are good at this, truly) but I also have faith in The Iron Rose's work, please understand me.

It's not I don't trust him. Watching videos to get the story is really awkward and time consuming. It's easier if you send me the script, I read over it, and then send you back my thoughts on the plot. It'd also help if you gave me a general outline of the plot in case something is unclear or hasn't been brought up/explained yet.

I'll balance it more, but it's not all about luck.

Fistly, you can reach the other side of the river in the two turns before enemy units appear. I just decided to wait for them in a near spot, that's all.

Secondly, you can let Helios go out of range from the dracoknights, so that they'll attack Fa (who most probably will survive if you place her in a castle/mountain tile); or you can let Helios in range so that they'll attack him since he's disarmed (like I did) but that way the enemies won't be weakened by Fa's counterattacks and will be harder to get rid of them.

Also, it's important to neutralize the units with iron lances first, since they have like 20% more hit rate than the ones with a javelin (and also deal more damage).

More importantly, I'll add two houses so that the player will have to visit them while escaping from the soldiers, or ignore them and fight. Whatever, I'll do it more various.

On rewatching it, it looks fine. I would recommend getting some people to playtest it to make sure, though.

I don't get the 'rape thing', honestly. ^^" What do you intend?

After watching the prologue, I think I know where Tangerine got that. When Novala says "get close to your butt." You don't need to worry. I doubt many people will take it that way. But it is a bit awkward. Just say "get close to you."

Quotation marks. There are two kinds. Use both. Also, generally, punctuation goes inside the quotation marks. There are a few exceptions, but you're safer putting them inside.

Edited October 18, 2012 by bottlegnomes

[The Iron Rose]

Creepy man on a horse following her and pretending to know her? I'm a woman. That gave off some seriously disturbing vibes to me. Then there was the whole Novala scene, which I can assure is being made much more subtle.

Beyond that, I'm just going through grammar and sentence structure now, but there are also a number of plot problems (namely, if Fa just decided to be herself and run away from her life of luxury - and I do hope you address how lucky she is compared to the rest of the world. Bitch can suck it up to be honest, but flawed protagonists make for a good story.) as well as mere stylism. Gameplay critiques, I basically agree with most folks, and sprites need a fair bit of work.

Linus splice guy is fucking creepy as is.

Actually most people are, as it happens. You have your callous asshole foreign princess, a creepy fucker on a horse who's disturbing as all hell, and a religious zealot. Fa looks downright normal by comparison.

...Which actually may be the point.

[Alfred Kamon]

Creepy man on a horse following her and pretending to know her? I'm a woman. That gave off some seriously disturbing vibes to me. Then there was the whole Novala scene, which I can assure is being made much more subtle.

Beyond that, I'm just going through grammar and sentence structure now, but there are also a number of plot problems (namely, if Fa just decided to be herself and run away from her life of luxury - and I do hope you address how lucky she is compared to the rest of the world. Bitch can suck it up to be honest, but flawed protagonists make for a good story.) as well as mere stylism. Gameplay critiques, I basically agree with most folks, and sprites need a fair bit of work.

Linus splice guy is fucking creepy as is.

Actually most people are, as it happens. You have your callous asshole foreign princess, a creepy fucker on a horse who's disturbing as all hell, and a religious zealot. Fa looks downright normal by comparison.

...Which actually may be the point.

Okay, you could all have told before.

It that's the general idea for now, then I think it's perfectly fine.

A disturbing unknown guy, an asshole princess, some unprobable characters here and there?

That's what I wanted for the beginning of my story.

Talking about it, I'm kinda disappointed. It's not your case since you stated "flawed protagonists make for a good story", but I have the overall impression that most people find weird and awkward having strange personalties to deal with through the game.

Why?

Should everyone be perfectly nice, fine? Should every character be predictable?

THAT would make a story terribly boring!

And, apart from that, FE characters haven't ever been normal to be honest. There were lesbian thieves, slim mages who eat 2 tons of meat per day, idiot curly pink-haired knights... take on every FE character, he'll just be absurd under some point of view.

Also, about "medieval logic"... Honestly speaking, it makes no sense. In a world where cities are built with magic, where knights fight on dragons and flying horses, we are here speaking about logic?! That's logic from OUR point of view! From the point of view of OUR world!

"The road is too linear"? It's made with magic.

Who can say it isn't like that? It's a fantasy world.

The story I'm creating isn't perfect, won't have perfect characters, may have characters say illogical and stupid things, may have disturbing characters, may have very good and reassuring ones, but hey, that's the world, this is reality, it's not all a bunch of perfection which works perfectly in a totally perfect way.

It's good to critique, but there is a limit to everything.

Next time I'll release three chapters at once, it will take much more time, but at least people won't complain because they don't understand plot things and whatever.

And if you find grammar errors or what, feel free to point that out, as well as if you think something is absolutely out of the point just tell it, but if I don't want to edit it because I've a certain idea of the story in mind, get over it, this is my hack. My story. My game. And I'm fucking believing in it.

Also sorry for that underlining, I didn't do that on purpose and it pisses me as well but the forum lags and I can't select test anymore to un-underline it. Whatever.

Edited October 19, 2012 by AlfredKamon

[Tangerine]

After watching the prologue, I think I know where Tangerine got that. When Novala says "get close to your butt." You don't need to worry. I doubt many people will take it that way. But it is a bit awkward. Just say "get close to you."

A guy in the prologue specifically says he's going to sell her body, that line being just before it only makes it sound like he intended to hurt her himself. There is no other way to take that than what was presented.

[HF Makalov Fanboy Kai]

trying to use real life logic in a fantasy videogame?

thats like expecting blitzball to actually be a real sport.

[Parrhesia]

trying to use real life logic in a fantasy videogame?

thats like expecting blitzball to actually be a real sport.

No, that's a totally irrelevant and useless analogy to make. The fact that AAAAAH FANTASY doesn't change the way roads are built. Nor does it change what looks good, and natural.

[Nanami Touko]

[rageblock of text]

Yeah I take back whatever I said about this having a chance of turning out good. With that attitude, this hack's not going anywhere.

I mean your first part about the characters is fine and all, because you're right, characters don't have to be perfect clichés, but then this

Also, about "medieval logic"... Honestly speaking, it makes no sense. In a world where cities are built with magic, where knights fight on dragons and flying horses, we are here speaking about logic?! That's logic from OUR point of view! From the point of view of OUR world!

"The road is too linear"? It's made with magic.

Who can say it isn't like that? It's a fantasy world.

The story I'm creating isn't perfect, won't have perfect characters, may have characters say illogical and stupid things, may have disturbing characters, may have very good and reassuring ones, but hey, that's the world, this is reality, it's not all a bunch of perfection which works perfectly in a totally perfect way.

It's good to critique, but there is a limit to everything.

Next time I'll release three chapters at once, it will take much more time, but at least people won't complain because they don't understand plot things and whatever.

And if you find grammar errors or what, feel free to point that out, as well as if you think something is absolutely out of the point just tell it, but if I don't want to edit it because I've a certain idea of the story in mind, get over it, this is my hack. My story. My game. And I'm fucking believing in it.

seems like a lot of whining about people pointing out flaws in your idea. If you can't handle it, then don't ask for opinions.

Edited October 19, 2012 by seph1212

[Agro]

thats like expecting blitzball to actually be a real sport.

Wait, it's not? What the hell have I been watching on ESPN, then?

[Mage Knight 404]

Okay.

I usually don't do this, but considering I'm one of the few FE8 ROM hackers here, I suppose I might as well throw down my two cents to your last long post.

Talking about it, I'm kinda disappointed. It's not your case since you stated "flawed protagonists make for a good story", but I have the overall impression that most people find weird and awkward having strange personalties to deal with through the game.

Why?

Should everyone be perfectly nice, fine? Should every character be predictable?

THAT would make a story terribly boring!

Sure, we shouldn't have one-dimensional characters with flat and boring personalities. I for one will freely admit that I don't really like writing my characters with quirky attitudes or personalities because I don't see my characters acting like that and wouldn't know what to do with them, nor do I know how to write convincing character flaws for them because like hell will I be able to write something legit. But having at least a few straight-arrow characters in a band full of weirdos should be okay, right? I mean, it'll just be the Mood Show Variety Hour.

Also the fact that everyone here is trying to tell you what should work and what shouldn't when writing a character and you trying to compromise or in worse cases brushing them off.

Also, about "medieval logic"... Honestly speaking, it makes no sense. In a world where cities are built with magic, where knights fight on dragons and flying horses, we are here speaking about logic?! That's logic from OUR point of view! From the point of view of OUR world!

"The road is too linear"? It's made with magic.

Who can say it isn't like that? It's a fantasy world.

Don't try to justify everything with "its fantasy it shouldn't have to make sense~" No, everything has to make sense to some degree unless your story is deliberately over-the-top and we're supposed to take the incredible as fact with no question.

The story I'm creating isn't perfect, won't have perfect characters, may have characters say illogical and stupid things, may have disturbing characters, may have very good and reassuring ones, but hey, that's the world, this is reality, it's not all a bunch of perfection which works perfectly in a totally perfect way.

Pobody's nerfect, after all. Regardless, we should still try to make the most of what we make, right?

It's good to critique, but there is a limit to everything.

Wrong. Critique is invaluable for people like us and they should always be distributed whenever possible. If I wasn't issued critique for my sprites, gameplay, or story for ASD by my friends, it'd still be a Sue-filled OC no-sense story with unexplained cameos and totally one-sided gameplay. :c

but if I don't want to edit it because I've a certain idea of the story in mind, get over it, this is my hack. My story. My game. And I'm fucking believing in it.

Okay, stop right there. wait you did

Take it from someone who's fighting this mode all the time. Get rid of this attitude and ideology. NOW. No one will take you seriously if you just say "whatever" to those trying offer their honest opinion, saying you'll go on regardless of what they say. Never ever ever EVER do that. Yes, this is your project. No one can say otherwise. But this DOES NOT excuse you from brushing off others who want to help and see you succeed if they don't see things your way. If this is how you feel, why bother showing this off at all?

...am I done? Can I go now?

Edited October 19, 2012 by Mage Knight 404

[The Iron Rose]

Yeah, basically what Seph and MK said. You have potential. You can event hack, make animations and sprites, you're willing to make your own, reasonably original story, and you're enough of a fan to actually do some work.

So that's pretty nice. But everyone neesd to be able to accept criticism, and learn to see what makes sense and what doesn't, what matters and what doesn't, and what works and what doesn't. The specific flaws I feel other people have gone over, and they're all easily solved!

But you can't do alone, and you can't do it without criticism.

[bottlegnomes]

A guy in the prologue specifically says he's going to sell her body, that line being just before it only makes it sound like he intended to hurt her himself. There is no other way to take that than what was presented.

Legitimate question. Where? I completely missed that.

[Tangerine]

Legitimate question. Where? I completely missed that.

3:30 in the prologue video.

[Alfred Kamon]

I apologize for the tone of my last post.

I got overstressed and acted like an idiot.

I'm usually calm and patient but that time I reacted pretty badly.

No excuses, I'm really sorry.

I am grateful to those who seriously replied in this topic.

I had thought about it: "Why was I insisting in doing this alone? And why did I create this topic to begin with, if I really wanted to do it all by myself?"

I must have sounded like a selfish megalomaniac from the very beginning. It's not like that... In reality, the story of the main characters of this hack is a little "my story". It's based on some real facts, thoughts, feelings. And that's why I was so jealous about it. But at the same time, I knew I just couldn't do this alone. It would have been a game for me... when I would have wanted to make a game for everyone, who could have made someone think deeply about certain matters, maybe making him smile, maybe making him saying he agreed, didn't agree...

My intention was purely this, but I knew it would have been damn difficult to create a game from zero, without having ever done it before.

I had already tried, two years ago, after all.

Mageknight.. no, Ray, it was your ASD which inspired me. After playing those 10 chapters, I really wanted to create my own hack, but I failed miserably. I wasn't even able to change Eirika's class.

And now, now I had the patience and the experiences I needed to get over this project of mine. I went far over my imagination, and I'm happy I didn't surrender after the first difficulty.

But in any case, I felt like I couldn't match the newer hacks. Maybe two years ago my efforts would have been looked differently, but now it's full of experienced team hackers and spriters whose skill is above my imagination. So I may have thought "Consider doing this alone, this work may be crap if you're helped but could look great as a one-man-solo". Man, that was stupid.

I know. What you say is right - I WILL need the help of everyone, to make a hack for everyone.

This isn't like writing a book. A game must be playable fist of all. And enjoyable.

So, I'm sorry.

I won't react like that again.

Please help me if you want, I'd appreciate that.

But please note, that just saying 'the sprites are awful' tells me that I still have to work on them, but it doesn't tell me how I should make them look better. Fact is, I have absolutely no idea what I should do about them. It would be good if some spriter could teach me how to make better sprites. I'll be glad to improve my skills, because I don't think this is the best I can do.

Also, please allow me to rephrase what I said in the last post, because I rage-expressed my feelings quite badly. I think this: "There are good and bad critiques, useful and less useful ones". I accept negative constructive critiques from people who knew what they were talking about because they watched the video and/or followed the discussion, but I felt kinda offended by those who popped out of nothing and said "I didn't watch anything but this doesn't make sense this way" when they didn't know the context in which that thing was inserted. When judging something it's good to know what we're talking about, I'm of this idea. Also when I stated "I may not want to edit it because I've a certain idea of the story in mind" I was referring to this, to the fact that I could consider a critique valid or not valid, thus deciding if it was worth basing on that to change or not the game. I think I've the right to decline a certain critique with which I don't agree, but at the same time I don't want to be an asshole who doesn't accept critiques at all. It never was my intention to do so, otherwise I wouldn't have shared my work so far and I wouldn't have opened this topic.

Well, this said, I agree to all the latest posts, which means I still have lot of work to do!

Hope this is settled. ; )

[Nanami Touko]

So, I'm sorry.

I won't react like that again.

Please help me if you want, I'd appreciate that.

But please note, that just saying 'the sprites are awful' tells me that I still have to work on them, but it doesn't tell me how I should make them look better. Fact is, I have absolutely no idea what I should do about them. It would be good if some spriter could teach me how to make better sprites. I'll be glad to improve my skills, because I don't think this is the best I can do.

ok

let's go over Fa then since she's the main offender.

Green circle first. Her hair shading is very chunky. What I mean by this is that there's no flow. Hair, when kept well, flows and curves and doesn't have such jagged turns like hers does. If you need good references for hair and how it should be shaped and shaded, you can look at FE7 and 8. Both games have enough longer haired characters for you to get a good look at how it should flow.

If you need a reference sheet with all FE GBA characters on it, click here

WHEN REFERENCING, STAY AWAY FROM FE6. The sprites from FE6 are all outdated in their shading, and make for very poor references.

Blue circle. Her hair is very flat at this part and others. Flat means that there's no definition in the hair, showing off either depth or multiple strands. Now, this can be hard to do for larger parts of hair, but having it as flat as that really make it look bad. The way it's shaded also doesn't fit with FE style shading, in that you're using way too much of the second shade. The second shade is normally used to show depth and detail between the first and second.

Purple circle. That little bit of "cleavage" (I am unsure of even calling it that) is too high, and from the shape of her shirt, shouldn't even be there. Cleavage doesn't occur in a normal shirt unless the shirt is really tight. And even so, as said before, it's too high. As for the shirt itself, it also suffers from flat shading, and could use some more definition in the form of wrinkles, or use of the second shade to show where shadows fall.

Grey circle. Her hair crown is going in a completely different direction than the rest of her hair, notably her bangs. You could invest in changing that.

As for the sprite overall, you're using completely off colors. Pick either FE7 or FE8, and stick to one for colors. Mixing them doesn't look good. Also, do not use pure black on a sprite. It looks gaudy, and it throws off the rest of the colors.

Ugh I haven't spliced in ever and it shows Full customs why but here's a splice that took way too long to throw together you can use as a reference, if you want, for something that looks a little better.

and here it is in Fe8 colors.

Edited October 19, 2012 by seph1212

[Alfred Kamon]

Thank you very much for your time, seph.

I get all the points.

I'll work on that and then post the result. ;P

[bottlegnomes]

3:30 in the prologue video.

Ah, that explains it. Completely missed that line (@AK, why I say I'd prefer a script to a video). I can see that, though I don't think it's a reference to sex slavery, just poorly worded. I think he's trying to say he'll get paid for killing her and bringing her body to whomever told him to do it. Something like "get gold for your royal head/scalp" should clear it up.

One thing about the prologue. I'm not really sure why you have Helios playable. He can't do anything and serves no purpose.

Edited October 19, 2012 by bottlegnomes

[Alfred Kamon]

Ah, that explains it. Completely missed that line (@AK, why I say I'd prefer a script to a video). I can see that, though I don't think it's a reference to sex slavery, just poorly worded. I think he's trying to say he'll get paid for killing her and bringing her body to whomever told him to do it. Something like "get gold for your royal head/scalp" should clear it up.

One thing about the prologue. I'm not really sure why you have Helios playable. He can't do anything and serves no purpose.

Whoa, you are right, that line is terrible.

I'll go over the first two chapters script again soon.

After Iron Rose finishes the check, I'm going to change the plot a while to fix problems like that. Then, I could pass it to you for a second-check if you want, battlegnomes.

Edit: I have seen the e-mail right now Iron Rose.

I redid the sprite.

Better?

(I honestly think the hair needs much more shading)

Update:

I think I'm getting the idea, though some shadings are lame and I still have to work on that.

I'll continue this tomorrow, I guess. It's late here right now.

Edited October 19, 2012 by AlfredKamon

[The Iron Rose]

I actually emailed you the updated dialogue a few hours ago! It's mostly fixing grammar and sentence structure, rather than anything plot or character related.

Fixed most of those issues though, and it should still be properly coded.

[Alfred Kamon]

I didn't notice that, my fault.

But you forgot to attach the file or it happened something in the e-mailing process, I'm not displaying it. ;P

Edited October 19, 2012 by AlfredKamon

[The Iron Rose]

Yeah I'm an idiot and forgot. Fixed it this time, though!

[Alfred Kamon]

I answered the e-mail. ^

I noticed I didn't properly answer to some points of the previous critiques so I'm going over them once again.

The whole rape/sex slavery implication in the prologue is a big turn off, it's one of the most alarming signs of weak writing. That type of thing just cannot be thrown in randomly, and it almost never has the effect on people that you want it to when you do that. They just end up a little angry that you even went there. It's not something you can just toss out there whenever you want to make a scene darker or more dramatic.

It wasn't my intention to let that part sound like that.

I just edited it right now, thanks for pointing that out.

Other than that, most of what can be said about the writing already has been. A lot of the things I'd be critical of could exist because you haven't created chapters far enough yet to fill in some glaring blanks. I understand that stories don't have to be spoon fed to the reader, and I'd hope that you intend for a lot more things to come to light in time.

It's exactly like that. I've no intention of explaining every single detail of the story in the prologue and in the first chapter of the game. That would be lame. Just don't worry that I'm not forgetting details, I'm just keeping some plotholes in order to keep the suspence, but everything will be explained at the proper time.

You're telling the reader things instead of showing them. For example, Fa's line "That's all? You really upset me." Don't have her say she's upset. Make her do something to show it. Another one, "Here they are! This is Hiokade's dragonknight squad!" They're enemies. The only one's we've been fighting are from Hiokade so far. They're on dragons. It's fairly obvious they're dragonknights from Hiokade. You don't need to tell us. Now if you meant it as Fa being surprised by them sending the dragonkights after her, it's not narrating through dialogue, just awkward.

Mmh, that's interesting. I think that editing that sentence in "What? That is Hoikade's dragonknight squad!" pretty much fixes the problem.

In fact, they were expecting some unknown enemies. Even if something is clear from the point of view of the player, it isn't for the characters in the game. They don't understand if a person is an enemy or not because it's red or green. Also putting it like that would make Fa surprised of the kingdom sending the dragonsquad after her, which is what I wanted.

And it's not awkward. I get what you say when you state that some things can be shown instead of explained through dialogue, but the game also has its limits.

If Fa is upset, I can just let her go to "...." and change her facial expression. I can't make her attack the person who was talking with her, it would be lame and stupid. I can't make her go away either, because I want her to stay there and talk. So it's ok like this. Not always the in-game dialogue fits a real dialogue, but I try to make it the best anyway. Just can't go over unappropriate tasks, though.

One thing about the prologue. I'm not really sure why you have Helios playable. He can't do anything and serves no purpose.

He can rescue Fa if things get bad or he can just attract enemies' attacks while she use a vulnerary, for example.

Don't try to justify everything with "its fantasy it shouldn't have to make sense~" No, everything has to make sense to some degree unless your story is deliberately over-the-top and we're supposed to take the incredible as fact with no question.

That's right, I can't say "it's fantasy so it shouldn't have to make sense", but I "can use fantasy to make sense". For the perfect road example, if it's like that and I don't explain anything, it's just bad and nonsensical. But if I have a character say: "This road was built over a hundred years ago by a powerful mage. It is perfectly straight and every single part of it still is protected by the mage's spell, even after his death", well, that would be a point.

... It's not the best example, but it means that I'm creating a world and I can do whatever I want with it as long as I explain things properly in a way that could make sense.

I'm waiting for a feedback about the edited sprite, anyway. It still is bad in some points like hair shading(better than before, anyway) but the palette should be alright at least, shouldn't it?

Edited October 20, 2012 by AlfredKamon

[bottlegnomes]

Mm, that's interesting. I think that editing that sentence in "What? That is Hoikade's dragonknight squad!" pretty much fixes the problem.

In fact, they were expecting some unknown enemies. Even if something is clear from the point of view of the player, it isn't for the characters in the game. They don't understand if a person is an enemy or not because it's red or green. Also putting it like that would make Fa surprised of the kingdom sending the dragonsquad after her, which is what I wanted.

And it's not awkward. I get what you say when you state that some things can be shown instead of explained through dialogue, but the game also has its limits.

If Fa is upset, I can just let her go to "...." and change her facial expression. I can't make her attack the person who was talking with her, it would be lame and stupid. I can't make her go away either, because I want her to stay there and talk. So it's ok like this. Not always the in-game dialogue fits a real dialogue, but I try to make it the best anyway. Just can't go over unappropriate tasks, though.

For the first, cut the that is. It'll make it sound more natural.

For the second, FE has done a very good job of showing with what thy have. You could has Fa turn away, move farther away, change her expression, and go "Huh!" that would be better.

He can rescue Fa if things get bad or he can just attract enemies' attacks while she use a vulnerary, for example.

He can't do anything while he's rescuing her. He doesn't have any weapons or healing items. All he can do is distract. In FE, forcing a character to be nothing more than a meat shield is kind of pointless.

[Nanami Touko]

I redid the sprite.

Better?

(I honestly think the hair needs much more shading)

Update:

I think I'm getting the idea, though some shadings are lame and I still have to work on that.

I'll continue this tomorrow, I guess. It's late here right now.

Stop trying to do your own shading, it doesn't look good. A simple splice would look much better.

And your palette still isn't okay, the outline is from FE8, and the skin colors are from FE7. The hair doesn't look dark enough to be from FE8.

if you can't handle the simple stuff you might want to try and get someone else to sprite for you

Edited October 20, 2012 by seph1212

[AstraLunaSol]

Oh, I'd like to mention that Fa's present clothing doesn't look very princessy, even if it does match up with the battle sprite.

[Alfred Kamon]

@battlegnomes:

For the second, FE has done a very good job of showing with what thy have. You could has Fa turn away, move farther away, change her expression, and go "Huh!" that would be better.

[...]

He can't do anything while he's rescuing her. He doesn't have any weapons or healing items. All he can do is distract. In FE, forcing a character to be nothing more than a meat shield is kind of pointless.

It's ok, I still have to draw an angry Fa portrait so I couldn't change it in situations like those. And I can't turn her without moving her, which would be inappropriate. I'll try to talk less and show more in the game, anyway.

That was a good point.

Stop trying to do your own shading, it doesn't look good. A simple splice would look much better.

And your palette still isn't okay, the outline is from FE8, and the skin colors are from FE7. The hair doesn't look dark enough to be from FE8.

if you can't handle the simple stuff you might want to try and get someone else to sprite for you

simple? I'm a noob at this, it looks hella difficult XP But I can do it.

To be honest the hair palette is Garcia's.

And I don't think there is a darker black than his..?

For the skin, I didn't notice that, I'll fix it.

For the shading, yeah, it's a disaster for now. Maybe I'll just stick up with part of Eirika's hair which seem to fit Fa's portrait quite well. Let me try.

And sorry if I may piss you off but I never seriously drawed anything in my life, though I may have some inner skill. Talent and skills are two different things IMO, so I may be a not talented spriter (everyone has his own talents) and i won't make awesome sprites, but with exercise I hope to bring out some skills I may possibly have to do at least decent ones.

Oh, I'd like to mention that Fa's present clothing doesn't look very princessy, even if it does match up with the battle sprite.

Good point.

That's because Fa hates being a Princess. =)

that, and also because I don't have idea how to slightly improve her dress, which anyway looks too simple even for a commoner.

Edited October 20, 2012 by AlfredKamon