[MISSION COMPLETE] FE7: The THWOMP Run

[burgerkong]

Hey all, longtime lurker and VERY occasional poster here, doing an FE7 THWOMP run in HHM for your enjoyment. I calculated the THWOMPness of all the FE7 characters based on the simple formula of HP + Def + Res - Spd.

I wasn't sure how to include base stats without skewing in favour of prepromotes, but here's the top 10 THWOMP units based on the calculation (and who I will likely be using):

(145) Oswin

(130) Hector, Lowen

(120) Wallace

(115) Ninils

(105) Eliwood, Canas

(100) Dorcas, Bartre

(95) Harken

Extremely good earlygame, but no healer until promoted Canas. For your perusal, here's the rest of the list:

(90) Kent, Marcus, Fiora, Jaffar

(85) Lucius, Heath, Geitz, Farina, Renault

(80) Sain, Wil, Serra, Raven, Hawkeye

(75) Erk, Merlinus, Pent

(70) Priscilla, Isadora, Louise

(65) Rath

(60) Lyn, Nino, Vaida

(55) Florina

(50) Matthew, Legault

(45) Rebecca, Guy, Dart, Karel, Karla

I feel like it's a good list, all things considering. I'll be doing a screenshot LP, so hopefully this will be fun for both you guys and me.

As an aside, an FE8 THWOMP would probably fun if you exclude Seth (who would undoubtedly make the list given his crazy growths). I was also considering an Anti-THWOMP playthrough using the bottom ten on the list, but that would mean Ch11 would require Hector use for the boss, and Ch12 would be a Matthew + Rebecca solo, which sounds like way too much hassle to me.

Here's the first chapter, feedback is appreciated:

Chapter 11: The THWOMP Lord Cometh

And so the THWOMP begins!

No other name is appropriate.

Marquess THWOMP gives no fucks.

What's odd is the lack of Hector's portrait here IMO

THWOMPbros4life

I should hope so, HP, Str, and Def pl0x.

The THWOMPiest twosome right here

LOL, with your crap HP and Def, think again.

THWOMP senses tingling

LOLdiers and Archers, you srs Matt?

You know you're a THWOMP when Def is your highest non-HP stat.

You on the other hand

LTC strats are a go!

Does anyone ever actually kill this dude?

Off to fulfill his only (?) contribution to this run.

The lack of THWOMP is disturbing...

If only Dragonshields were buyable in this game :(

His 29 HP and 14 Def might be why

THWOMP WHY

Shoutouts to Horace's HHM run (this is the right number of turns right...?)

With the Speed I'm getting so far, it just might be possible.

THWOMP BROS UNITE

the irony

Again, feedback is appreciated! As an aside, how do you guys want me to play? Should I play draft-style where I cannot use any of the other characters? Or should I be allowed thieves and clerics? I'll leave it up to you guys to let me know in your posts

Edited March 30, 2014 by burgerkong

[MRDRHAWK]

lmao, this is already great.

Though, for true THWOMP, wouldn't you need to use the formula (HP + Str + Def) - (Res + Spd)?

since, y'know, THWOMPs usually have bad Res.

I'm keeping an eye on this, though.

[PM ME MARIANNE ART]

OSTHWOMP better kill the dragon

With a slim lance

I expect screens

[General Horace]

I laughed when I saw ninils near the top of the THWOMP catergory, haha.

But yeah, it might be better to use Poly's formula, although honestly Knights/Generals don't usually have that much lower resistance than other physical units (like Oswin and Wallace have 30 and 35% res growths respectively, which is actually among the highest res growth for non pegasi physical units)

you might need a restore staff user at the very least, maybe just allow Serra for staves only or something.

Edited January 10, 2014 by General Horace

[burgerkong]

@ poly and Horace

You guys are probably right. I'll run the calcs now, I just used those since I liked the spread of characters (no fliers/Sain, all mid-low tiers). But thanks for the feedback, hoping to get out Ch12 later tonight.

And @ Duck, remind me before Final and you'll get what you want ;)

[phobia]

lmao, this is already great.

[burgerkong]

Running with Poly's calcs, here's the THWOMP list from THWOMPiest to wimpiest:

(140) Hector

(130) Dorcas

(125) Oswin

(105) Raven

(100) Sain, Lowen, Bartre

(95) Wallace, Heath, Geitz

(80) Eliwood, Kent, Dart, Harken

(75) Farina, Vaida

(65) Rath

(60) Wil, Canas

(50) Marcus, Isadora, Hawkeye, Louise

(45) Merlinus, Karel, Jaffar, Renault

(40) Lyn, Matthew

(35) Erk, Pent

(25) Florina, Rebecca, Guy, Lucius, Fiora, Legault

(20) Serra, Karla

(10) Priscilla, Nino

(-20) Ninils (LOL)

So yeah, I think it's a little more accurate (absolutely no magic users so this is gonna be hell unless you guys want me to use healers), but at the same time allows units like Raven and Sain due to their godly HP and Str despite low Def. Wallace and Geitz are also BOTH in the top 10, and Geitz is going to be impossible for me to get anyways so I'd prefer using someone like Eliwood to maintain continuity with my first post (THWOMPbrosplz).

Let me know if you prefer my old list of this one ASAP, so I can get these chapters done!

[phobia]

I like this new one because it includes Raven and Dart.

Do it.

[cyron]

i'd go new list

[MRDRHAWK]

ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

no Magic hurts, but SEX PANTHER and Raven doe...

[Gcubedude]

Awww, no Canas.

But yeah, new list makes more sense. No magic, but you got a flyer out of it.

[BBM]

The old list is way funnier; I vote for that. You're going to have to add in Serra for Restore or something either way.

[burgerkong]

I've (hopefully) posted a poll so you guys can vote, I'm currently finishing up Ch. 12 to post later tonight.

[Tables]

These are the FE8 lists for those curious, since it was mentioned and only takes a minute to make.

[spoiler=+Res]Myrrh (245)

Gilliam (135)

Duessel (130)

Gerik (120)

Tethys (120)

Seth (115)

Garcia (100)

Dozla (100)

Ephraim (95)

Kyle (95)

Knoll (90)

Ross (85)

Artur (85)

Forde (85)

Moulder (80)

Natasha (80)

Cormag (80)

Syrene (80)

Franz (75)

Innes (75)

Saleh (75)

Eirika (70)

Ewan (70)

Joshua (65)

Amelia (65)

L'Arachel (65)

Rennac (60)

Colm (55)

Lute (55)

Marisa (55)

Neimi (45)

Tana (45)

Vanessa (40)

[spoiler=+STR/-RES]Myrrh (275)

Gilliam (140)

Garcia (135)

Duessel (125)

Gerik (115)

Seth (105)

Kyle (105)

Cormag (105)

Dozla (100)

Ephraim (100)

Ross (95)

Forde (75)

Franz (75)

Moulder (70)

Amelia (70)

Innes (65)

Joshua (60)

Colm (55)

Knoll (50)

Eirika (50)

Lute (40)

Tana (40)

Saleh (35)

Ewan (35)

Marisa (35)

Natasha (30)

Artur (25)

Rennac (25)

Syrene (20)

Neimi (20)

L'Arachel (15)

Vanessa (15)

Tethys (-25)

The only difference between the two's top ten is that the latter has Cormag instead of Tethys.

[burgerkong]

These are the FE8 lists for those curious, since it was mentioned and only takes a minute to make.

[spoiler=+Res]Myrrh (245)

Gilliam (135)

Duessel (130)

Gerik (120)

Tethys (120)

Seth (115)

Garcia (100)

Dozla (100)

Ephraim (95)

Kyle (95)

Knoll (90)

Ross (85)

Artur (85)

Forde (85)

Moulder (80)

Natasha (80)

Cormag (80)

Syrene (80)

Franz (75)

Innes (75)

Saleh (75)

Eirika (70)

Ewan (70)

Joshua (65)

Amelia (65)

L'Arachel (65)

Rennac (60)

Colm (55)

Lute (55)

Marisa (55)

Neimi (45)

Tana (45)

Vanessa (40)

[spoiler=+STR/-RES]Myrrh (275)

Gilliam (140)

Garcia (135)

Duessel (125)

Gerik (115)

Seth (105)

Kyle (105)

Cormag (105)

Dozla (100)

Ephraim (100)

Ross (95)

Forde (75)

Franz (75)

Moulder (70)

Amelia (70)

Innes (65)

Joshua (60)

Colm (55)

Knoll (50)

Eirika (50)

Lute (40)

Tana (40)

Saleh (35)

Ewan (35)

Marisa (35)

Natasha (30)

Artur (25)

Rennac (25)

Syrene (20)

Neimi (20)

L'Arachel (15)

Vanessa (15)

Tethys (-25)

The only difference between the two's top ten is that the latter has Cormag instead of Tethys.

Thanks for that Tables, if I decide to do an FE8 THWOMP only run (which I'm already considering given how this one is going) I'll definitely be using this! Seth is a bit boring to use, but I'll decide what to do with him later (meatshielding until a certain point, or maybe just replacing him entirely).

Almost done Chapter 12, I have until Chapter 16 (Sain's recruitment) before I have to close the poll and decide, so hurry up and vote for the THWOMP team you want to see!

[Elieson]

I wamna see only 100+ units!

[burgerkong]

I wamna see only 100+ units!

Assuming that you're talking about my original list, that would be fine (Harken doesn't show up for a long-ass time anyways, so you'll be getting your wish for the most part anyways).

For my improved list based on Poly's suggestions however, it would mean excluding Wallace, which just seems wrong in a THWOMP run...

[eclipse]

Use Athos. . .as a meatshield! Tee-hee~!

If you have Canas as your magic user, then rush him to Restore, for giggles.

[Elieson]

Mmmm tru, no tink tink thwomp would be complete without Wall Ace

[Loki Laufeyson]

This is THWOMPY enough for Loki to notice. I shall be watching. No FlorinaTHWOMP doe...

[burgerkong]

And here it is, last minute before bed!

Lord THWOMP and Osthwomp head to Santaruz to meet up with half our THWOMP army, in Eliwood the THWOMP Bro, HorseTHWOMP, Bartre the THWOMP, and Dorcas.

On the next chapter of FE:THWOMP...

Chapter 12: THWOMP Army Assemble!

Which is only 4 Mov a turn because of Osthwomp

"Someone less THWOMP than me!"

"We have all those generic NPC knights laying around and my brother sends me these?!"

THWOMP Code Part I - Never mess with the THWOMPs.

Another reason for me not to use you.

teehee~, you know me too well Osthwomp.

Sounds like a plan.

THE IRONY

Osthwomp the THWOMP

Don't let his 6 Speed fool you, his 20% growth will almost ensure THWOMP status.

Horsethwomp. Not as strong as Sex Panther tho (shoutouts, #Poly)

Bartre the Axethwomp, just look at that Speed!

THWOMP Bro, I'll use him for now and see how the poll goes.

The hitrates in this chapter, goddamnit...

And the clusterfuck begins

WTF BARTRE GETS DOUBLED ALREADY

Just wait until FE6

lolskill

lolhitrates

kk thx 4 the 4k gold old timer

Tactics = gambling

I think I'm getting better at this screenshot stuff

The clusterfuck dwindles.

THWOMP + Speed, I'll take it.

Man I'm so good (at coin flips)

What is up with these Speed growths man

No HP or Def, but at least no Speed

No boys around here, only THWOMPS

I'M SO GOOD AT THIS GAME

SPEED WTF WHY (*but good job osthwomp)

I'd personally rather meet those thwomps you brought with you...

Not with his 5 Str he isn't.

Marquess THWOMP, c'mon THWOMP Bro, get with it.

"I mean, he's a general according to his cutscene sprites."

Osthwomp

They bring shame to Ostians everywhere.

"He just stood there and let me kill him too."

WHY DO YOU NOT KNOW ME, I NAMED MYSELF AFTER YOUR PEOPLE

Like that sexy 6 turn strat last chapter, which I totally didn't steal from Horace

Or so thin

Pick the units with the highest HP, Str, and Def. Ingenious!

IT CAN'T BE TRUE! THERE CAN'T BE CHARACTERS LESS THWOMP THAN SERRA

Remember to vote for the THWOMP poll before Chapter 16! I'll be posting Chapter 13 either tomorrow or the day after, depending on how busy I am.

[Loki Laufeyson]

Such Thwomp.
Speed Thwomps are best Thwomps! You got a speed level with Bartre! Things can only go up from here!

[DodgeDusk]

I'm liking this already. Will definitely follow

[bottlegnomes]

[posh accent] Quite enjoyable, indeed. [/posh accent]

But for real, nice. Looks like a fun read. As for thwomp calcs, the only other thing I can think of is 20/20 stats, but from a cursory glance, it looks like Raven, Heath, and Sain still break the mold.

[burgerkong]

Hey everyone, sorry for the delay! I'm back with the next chapter. Now that the THWOMP Bros are reunited, we head to Santaruz to fight a certain enemy thwomp, and try to actually gain THWOMP levels!

Chapter 13: Curse of the THWOMP

THWOMP Bros Unite!

Curse you Booooooooool

LOL Hector and Friends

"He's bringing a bunch of THWOMPs with him, we can't possibly win"

That's actually probably just your arthritis

THWOMP senses tingling

I'm pretty sure the clanking and bright green facial hair gave you away

Lord THWOMP the badass right here

Obligatory evil laugh whilst running away... check (couldn't we have just killed him right here?)

And you gotta eat if you wanna be a THWOMP.

Matthew...that name sounds familiar...

If you mean mindlessly throwing THWOMPs at enemies, then yeah, I'd say so.

K thx, go hide in a corner or something.

Westward we ride! (Or walk, whatever)

OUR FIRST THWOMP LEVEL, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL

And fuck your glitchy ass mines too

No way I'm going that way, gotta go get Chapter 13x man.

Time to sell this baby for the best weapon in this game

Yeah, Lowen's kinda getting wrecked

The hitrates earlygame man... (thankfully I'm good at this game)

As expected of Dorcass

I was considering killing him for his lack of THWOMPiness, but Osthwomp was too far away

You're a non-boss portrait character, you must be on my side!

I'm pretty sure you're getting paid minimum wage anyways

EliTHWOMP

Lord THWOMP

The only thing my thwomps can double :(

THWOMP Bro Bonding Time

He gained HP, Str, and Def, of course he's doing well

"Can't have you overlevelling me after all"

"Evidenced by my statscreen, LOOK AT IT"

Lord THWOMP likes it rough~

We'll try to fix that, don't worry :)

Nothing truer has been spoken

Well, HP and Defense are important too

Fuck, he's sleeping right now!

AND RISKY STRATS ARE A GO

WHY OSTHWOMP

WHY BARTHWOMP

I'm pretty sure he could hear you coming

No shit you are, can I trade you for Eliwood or something?

HORSETHWOMP

And I forgot this cavalier was still alive (SAVESCUMMING ACTIVATE)

That's much better, good job HorseTHWOMP

C'mon Lord THWOMP, you gotta set a better example for your subjects

Didn't actually attack, but goddamn is Bool a THWOMP. CURSE YOU BOOOOOOL

Actually, iirc he doesn't know shit.

"They're mostly incompetent, but those Four Fang dudes might be a threat..."

The Apparently All-Knowing Thwomp

Should, but can't. 'sides, we got a fat merchant to save!

Well, we never come back here so I guess they'll be defending the castle for a while...

On the contrary, I'm just here to beat the game with THWOMPs

Remember to vote while you can, poll closes at Chapter 16!

Edited January 13, 2014 by burgerkong