Nintales Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 (edited) Hello, guys! After I got bored by chapter 2 ragequitted FE4 deemed FE4 wasn't my cup of tea right now, I've decided to play a game with horrible map design horrible storywriting a lot of characters to toy with! [spoiler=da rulz] 1- If a unit dies, it dies. 2- Male Character B set is unlocked. Though RP and Luna Statboosters are forbidden. 3- Story will be rewritten because it sucks. 4- True Ending must be achieved, unless you're a wymp or someone auffle. 5- All houses must be checked. FOR REASONS. [spoiler=The beginning of our epic new adventure!] U-uhh... Hello? Is there anyone out there? I'm coming for the recruitment. Oh, don't be so hasty! Here I am here I am! Name's Anna, I'm in charge of recruiting the new knights. What's your name, "hero"? Name's Mark. Are you obliged to say the hero thingy? That's quite disturbing. Oh, can't I have fun? Alright, then, next question. Are you a boy or a girl? It should seem obvious that I'm a guy. Of course. To be honest, even I don't know why they told me to ask that. Now... Tell me more about yourself. Well... I lived in Sera. I'm the son of the town's priest. It's a nice village, if you ever went there. Very peaceful. Grandpa often says the best quality I have is my wisdom. I'm pretty fast at judging what to do in some dangeous situation. And, when I grow up, I seek to live a honorable life, traveling around the world and helping people with my healing powers. Aaand done! Now hurry up, Sir Jagen will be seeing all the new recruits in thirty minutes! You better be there, kiddo! Alright miss! Here I g... *bump!* E-eeeeh? Are you hurt somewhere? I'm sorry! I-I apologize! A-Are you okay? oh gosh what am I doing she'll think I'm totally crazy I-It's okay! You don't have to be sorry! I'm kinda clumsy, to be honest. This is actually the second time I bump into someone! O-oh. You're sure it's okay? Yeah. Yeah. Once I heard about the recruitment I rushed in there like a child. oh noes she'll think I'm totally immature and crazy what have I done Me too. To think I'll be able to serve Prince Marth makes me so happy... By the way, what's your favorite story about him? To me... The liberation of Altea. I saw it with my own eyes. Marth and his army rushing through the way, along with General Wolf shielding Miss Lena and Queen Minerva from enemies, while they triumphed against all odds. Interesting. Not my favorite though. The best is in my opinion what happened in Khadein. Fighting against Gharnef, while none of the troups could really handle him, and surviving through all of this. Just. Epic. Yeah, this one's great too. However, it's only the second one for me. What's your name, miss? You can call me Mark. I'm Katarina. Welp, I gotta go. See ya later! Seems I better hurry too! Wait for meeeee! All will fear the name of Luke the Great, the Fabulous, the Fearsome, the... Luke, could you stop? Everyone's looking at you. They're probably thinking you're a weirdo. What, Rody? Nonsense! I don't get how they could? They're probably looking at me because I'm the most dazzling guy around! What? Hey, wait! Here I cooooome! Be prepared, for it is a tough challenge that awaits you! Right now... Out of a thousand people, only 30 got recruited! 30? Don't worry. I think we'll pass this test for sure. I'm so scared help me This is nothing for Luke the Brave! He'll get all the rewards for sure! Oh, stop it... Then, Katarina, would yo It doesn't seem like that, but I'm pretty good at using magic. Then here we are! With my staff and your magic, nothing will prevent us from winning! we better win this help me W-What? So soon? Yes, it's your turn! Don't wuss and fight! Here we ride, it's time for us to fight! With my magic, I will pre *bump!*. Are you alright, Katarina? Y-Yes, I thi... Ouch! My arm hurts! Is it bad? Yes! I can't even lift my tome! Oh-oh... Welp. You were a curate's son, right? Yes, what about it? Hey, you two! Stop dazing off and get ready for action! You can read ancient magic then, am I right? Yes, but I don't get your point... Take the tome, and fight. I told you I'm training to be a strategist. Even hurt, I can still give you advices from afar. A-Are you sure it's gonna be okay? I'm not that of an expert at fighting... No problem. I'll even read the words for you if you need to. Al-Alright. Here we go! Is this how we do? Yes! You're doing great, Mark! It hit him! Yes! Don't be so sure of yourself, kiddo! I'm not that bad too! Ouch! It really hurts! T'is war, son. Now fight back! Alright, here it comes! Great! You took him down! Now time to move on... To Sir Jagen. Whew. He's really strong. Especially compared to me. Don't worry. I think we can still get him. How? Be quiet, and just listen to what I'll tell you. First of all, go into his range. Then, use the vulnerary to heal yourself. Afterwards, he'll attack you. Stay in his range, and heal yourself again. You're doing great, Mark. This is the final step now, so listen correctly! ... Heal again, and now attack. Then you'll get him. It was this easy? Weird. I got a lot of experience doing so. Great! Don't forget you had a "master tactician" with you, Mark! You were not even supposed to defeat me. All you had to do to win the test was beating the soldier and weakening me a little bit. Oh... Sorry, then. No, consider this as a bonus. You're a really strong duo, and you have some future for you. I hope we'll see more people like you. *30 minutes later, after all the tests* Pr-ince Marth? Mark, I'm so excited! Me too! To believe he's gonna come and talk to all of us... Oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh! People like you are the pride of our nation. I think you've heard many stories about me. While some of them might be invented, they all share a precious lesson. You can't fight on your own. I wish you to cherish your partners for they'll be the ones that will be there in the toughest moments. Never give up on a friend. Those are the most important people to have in those times of reconstruction. If you excuse me, now, I have to go. King Hardin and Queen Nina await me. He's so dashing! Oooh... I think I'm falling for him. Not in love, though, but he's just admiring. I wish more people were like him. As you say. Prince Marth's a hero! Imagine if we get to serve him... I think we'll have to work hard. Let's get to bed now, don't you agree? Yeah, this day exhausted me. Good night, Mark. 'Night, Katarina. [spoiler=Nin's thoughts] First of all, I did not intend to have such a bad MU. I basically did the things plot-wise, so yeah... Didn't expect I'd pick the suckiest choices! :D Secondly, as you can see, I'm rewriting the story so it's just not about "glorifying MU". Though if I have issues with colors I might be using the entire palette or I'll have to write some of them in italics. Dunno yet. Edited September 14, 2015 by Nintales Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
entrall spearmen Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 It seems really good so far. As far as I can remember. I gave up on fe12 after beating it twice. Best of luck gameplay wise. Keep it up story wise Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vonretic Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 Nice. Go go go go! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nintales Posted September 14, 2015 Author Share Posted September 14, 2015 (edited) It seems really good so far. As far as I can remember. I gave up on fe12 after beating it twice. Best of luck gameplay wise. Keep it up story wise Thanks! It's gonna be really hard though as I'll have to get through everything (some houses will be hell imo), and if a unit dies in the hell that's FE12, it's perma-death. Of course if MU or Marth dies, I reset. I'll have you choosing a unit who's gonna die though as a tribute for their death. Nice. Go go go go! Thanks thanks thanks! :D [spoiler=The journey goes on!] 'lo, Katarina. Oh, Mark, you can call me Kat, now. Good morning. Alright. Hey, what's that paper you have in your hand? You're gonna be surprised. It says... Oh, me too! It's gonna be awesome! ... By the way, how's your arm? Still quite hurt, to be honest with you. The curates say it won't cure itself until at least a month. Oh, bummer then. Yeah. We also get new teammates. The letter says we should be reunited... Just there! They should be there in ten minutes, I guess. Thirty minutes later... Fighting through the enemies, rescuing damsels in distress! Here he is, here he comes! All hail Luke, saviour of Altea! W-Whoah, hang in there! Dude, slow down. Most importantly, how did you do to take THIRTY MINUTES to be there? If you're who I think you are, your room is just next to ours! That's because I had more important duties to do! Like... Oh, Luke, let's just tell them the truth. You were chatting with one of the castle's priest, and you totally forgot about it. And I waited for you. I deeply apologize for our late arrival. Yeah, seems to be it. Luke, Kat, you and I. U-uh, guys... ... ? Who's there? It's me! I've been in there for an hour! How did you not remark me? O-oh... Sorry, Ryan... is it? I was probably so busy talking with Mark I didn't even saw you were there. Yeah, sorry about it, we should have noticed you. Katarina, is it? Why are we here for? There must be a reason for this meeting other than getting us to know each other. Yes, I was going to talk about it, Rody. Sweet! I'd say we should decide that by a vote. I vote Mark. Guess I'll vote myself. I vote for Luke the Savage! Hmmf... Seems I'll have to join Luke there. Hmm... Ryan? Who are you voting for? I-I dunno. I don't really know you. I think though... Mark's more confirmed. We've heard quite things about him from Sir Jagen. You're actually the only ones who defeated him, you know? S-Seriously? Weird. Seemed easy to me. Kat, you're kinda being mean there. Look at him! O-oh! I'm sorry, Ryan! I didn't mean to say it like that! Enough of this! Luke the Valiant does not accept to be mocked like that! ... We still didn't beat Sir Jagen while they did. Quiet, Rody. I said I want a match! Man-to-man! And the one who'll win will be the commander! If you want to. You're gonna get crushed though. Do you know that? U-uh... Kat. Are you sure? They're still cavaliers! No worries. I can handle people like that in no-time. As long as we are together. So, we'll have to fight him on? Actually, it's more of a 2v2. I'll be siding with Luke. W-Wait, that's unfair! I can't fight! T-T-Then... Can I help you guys? Awesome! Ryan, you get to be in Mark's team! We'll teach them a lesson, boys! *Everyone's positioning themselves.* ARE YOU READY? YES! WE CAN BEGIN! Are you sure? Don't get overconfident though. We should better fight together, Luke. Nah, I can handle them fine. We'll just give it our all, and you won't even need to be there while I get to crush the two of them! Yeah, Ryan told us. Didn't you listen to him? Could you just let me speak? Anyways. I won't let myself be overshadowed by a mere guy who learnt magic in a flash! Hey, I didn't learn it in a fl Mark, what are you doing? Just fight him! It hurts! Luke, you're clearly giving it your all, as I see! See, Mark? THIS is my true strength! It will be even more useful when you'll be under Mark's orders! Hey, stop being an annoyance! I. Can. Do. Whatever pleases me. Tee hee hee, you're blushing. Is it one of your strategies for making me give up? Well it won't work! In fact, I don't even hear you! LALALALALALALA! ... *facepalm* You know what, blue head? Wait, what? I've had enough of you making fun of me. You were always teasing me at school. Now it's time for the payback, moron. I don't even remember you! Sure you're speaking of Luke the Magnific? Yes, pretty sure. Now that I can do so, I will mercilessly get all of my anger into you. Then I'll get back at being nice. But right now... Let me just aim that arrow in your knees, would you? E-ep! You're weird! Well, funny Ryan shares my feelings. Show him boy! Mark, Luke isn't that smart. He's not gonna attack Ryan, so if you heal yourself... Then he'll attack me and we'll finish him. I got it. Guess what? Payback's awesome. Now, I've forgotten all about you. Nice to meet you, I'm Ryan. Who're you? Stop it! Stop making fun of me! But it's soooo fun, don't you think that? UUUUURGH! I'm out! I'll see you after Rody completely crushes you! Speaking of Rody... Yeah, he's just as strong as Luke. Which means not that much but he can still pull out some damage. You should better heal yourself before going in. Can't disagree with you, Kat. Now just bait him into his doom. As you say, "Commander"! Hey, you're gonna be the commander if we win! Not I? Oh, come on, you're blushing! Isn't that cute? I should better learn some tactician skills right now so I can even beat you as a commander! W... Wait till my arm gets back! Then... Then I'll make you pay! I was just kidding, don't worry. I know I won't beat you before long in these kind of skills. Oh... Thanks, I guess? Well, we should better get back to the fighting. Know it, Rody. They're not rumor. They're the truth. Isn't that right, Kat? Totally! Oh. Then I guess I know what I'll have to expect from you. You're actually smarter than Luke. Not like it was that hard. I should better aim for the hand then. Ryan, are you alright? Yes, that was quite the beating, but... Don't worry. I can take those fine, my bro trained me a little bit to take hits for the team. He seems to be fine. My grandpa used to do the same with me. A healer must be ready to take hits for his friends, he said. Aannd... Weakened! Mark, your turn to move! Alright! I hope you're reoady? I think I speak for everyone when I say this pun made me die from the inside. Yeah. Yes. Was it that bad? Sure. Just make it quick. Hey hey! See? Told ya we would crush you! Hhrrrrgr... But I don't get it! How could we lose! We were way stronger than these two! First of all, we were three, you idiot. Secondly, that was a very stupid move not to attack together. You could have gotten Ryan, then Mark. You're quite stupid, you know? Hrmm... Could we stop with that, actually? I kinda apologize if I seemed rude to you. Wasn't at all how I wanted to sound. Great. Good. Alright. ... Okay. Let's just hope you really understood now... Why do I even bother. I'm out. Hey, don't get out of here! I'm out too, gotta see Mister Wrys to fix me up, then go to sleep. Me too. Later, Luke. D-Don't leave me... Mark, are you still there? Yeah, what's the matter? And what will it be? You better use all you've got in your head to think of an incredible name for me... Okay, I'm out. Bye, Luke! Wait, what's the problem? I don't get it! H-HEY! [spoiler=Nin's thoughts] To be honest, I was quite scared when I saw Rody had a 1% crit on Ryan. It would mean I'd lose someone in the prologue, which is quite frankly... Just sad. :D And I had 1 minute of laughter when I looked at my screen and saw "Mark the Ordinary". Glorious. Edited September 14, 2015 by Nintales Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vonretic Posted September 15, 2015 Share Posted September 15, 2015 Good going. But is it just me or... I think the characters are being made into stereotypes, like if Luke is a little womanizer and his mouth is a little bigger than the others, he doesn't really have to be a bully, like he bullied Ryan "back in the days", and I get it that everyone makes fun of him because he is funny as I remember him when I've played through, but not as well stupid. As well this thing goes for Ryan too, just because he is younger and smaller than the others it doesn't matter that he has to be shy or afraid. Maybe is just me, but I think they are turning into stereotypes. Try to keep their personality as you like but also at the same time make them take a stand and make them have more "judgment", If I say so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nintales Posted September 15, 2015 Author Share Posted September 15, 2015 Good going. But is it just me or... I think the characters are being made into stereotypes, like if Luke is a little womanizer and his mouth is a little bigger than the others, he doesn't really have to be a bully, like he bullied Ryan "back in the days", and I get it that everyone makes fun of him because he is funny as I remember him when I've played through, but not as well stupid. As well this thing goes for Ryan too, just because he is younger and smaller than the others it doesn't matter that he has to be shy or afraid. Maybe is just me, but I think they are turning into stereotypes. Try to keep their personality as you like but also at the same time make them take a stand and make them have more "judgment", If I say so. Yes, can't disagree. Though this is only one chapter about Luke, Ryan and Rody's interaction with Kat&Mark (who are right now the leading duo), and there's plenty coming. In a while though, I need to play it now. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vonretic Posted September 15, 2015 Share Posted September 15, 2015 Yes, can't disagree. Though this is only one chapter about Luke, Ryan and Rody's interaction with Kat&Mark (who are right now the leading duo), and there's plenty coming. In a while though, I need to play it now. :D I'm waiting for the next chapter so good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squidmark Iggy Posted September 15, 2015 Share Posted September 15, 2015 Huh, this sure looks interesting, don't mind if I'll a peek! And maybe wait for another update while I'm at it... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vonretic Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 Gave up already mate? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nintales Posted September 17, 2015 Author Share Posted September 17, 2015 Gave up already mate? Not yet, don't worry. :3 The updates are just gonna come on week-ends most of the time as school's in the way. =D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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