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*yawns* Sure, I'll wait a little more to seize Mackily Castle in this draft... *rolls over, then dies*

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The research is not being continued by humans, but has been adopted by highly intelligent monkeys, who through their placement in zoos are set to establish a new world (monkey) order! It's rational for them to want to continue the research when the plague wiped out their distant cousins.

Then again, Procrastination succeeded in its ultimate goal, so another genocide can wait awhile. They'll get to it eventually...

Highly intelligent monkeys... oh, you just wait.

for some reason i thought the virus's name being CrashGordin94 would be a good idea

Now I want to know who this "CrashGordin" is.

So, after much deliberation, I have decided that naming our virus memes would be a good idea. But I decided to use one of our older name suggestions: Not just memes, DANK memes. Hentai Anime gave me pause, maybe soon...

Plague Inc: Episode 3: Dank Memes Virus!

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Ooh, an update. Now, if only I had someone to multiplayer with.

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Alright, so. I want to say something here. The plagues are NOT arranged by difficulty. Bacteria is moderate difficulty. Virus is the easiest disease in the game. Our next disease, fungus, is the hardest.

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Let's equip our nice new gene!

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We're starting in China, because we need to get to all parts of the world fast. China shall be the origin of Dank memes!

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Viruses are interesting. They mutate extra-often, and in exchange everything costs DNA points to devolve right from the start. So, some of this is up to the RNG, but as I said, it's the easiest disease in the game.

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The very first thing we're going to want to do is get more mutations. Instead of Bacterial Resilience, virus has Viral Instability upgrades, which make it mutate even more! With these plus Darwinist, we'll be CONSTANTLY developing new symptoms.

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A new chain event! This one actually happens a lot. Basically, if it goes through("it going through" means you getting drug resistance), the UK will become infected. Of course, by the time it happens, the UK will be infected anyways, at least if you start in China.

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An older meme develops, making people's stomachs turn.

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Hah, hah, hah.

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People lay awake, thinking about the memes they have witnessed.

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A sudden surge of disgust at WRONG MEME USAGE causes major stomach problems.

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So, our actual strategy! With a virus, what you want to do is let the disease handle symptom evolving, while you evolve transmissions and abilities to let it spread faster and resist the cure.

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Memetic lumps begin to form...

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Bird migration! If you have Avians 1 upgraded, this can let you infect a few new countries. Definitely a good thing for us right now.

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Paranoia levels begin to increase... where will the next meme develop? What will it be? WILL PEOPLE USE IT AGAINST ME?

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Hot and cold resistance next.

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We're still unnoticed, but what with how fast symptoms are developing, that will change soon. We want to be prepared.

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Now that we've spread a fair bit, we'll want even more of those great mutations!

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Memes make-wait, crap! That gives us lethality. It's a bit early for it, but we'll be okay.

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And of course, that makes us get discovered. Luckily, we're still considered minor!

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Of course a memetic death is in Korea.

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Wow, already! Granted, China IS fully infected right now.

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We can't wait any longer, have to start hardening ourselves for the storm ahead.

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People cough in embarrassment at raunchy memes.

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Dangit! When a country is fully infected, every ship and plane they send is also infected, so when they shut down their stuff it keeps the disease IN the country, not just out of it!

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Too late, chain event! The UK already has the disease!

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Memes are paralyzing people with laughter!

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Our disease's symptoms are quickly reaching critical levels. We need to spread FAST, or the world will start shutting stuff down and locking us in.

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Skipping ahead a little, we're infecting a lot of countries, but being placed on the watchlist means we can't wait any longer. The world is going to try to stop us in full force!

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Memes with lots of flashing lights are triggering seizures!

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The world is halfway infected and the cure isn't going super-fast YET, even though we have a ton of symptoms. We still have a lot of hotter countries and a few island countries to get before we can go full force, though!

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I get Livestock and Rodents 1 to help us out. I hoped to go for all the animal transmissions, but it didn't work out.

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This is what our symptoms menu is looking like. It can get pretty weird with viruses.

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Even raunchier memes are making people sensitive and self-conscious.

...That's not what Hyper Sensitivity as a medical condition is? LA LA LA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

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DANK MEMES CANNOT BE STOPPED!

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Maximum viral instability, hot and cold resistance 2, and genetic hardening 2! How do we have the points to do all these things, you ask? Well, believe it or not, severity controls your automatic flow of DNA points, and how much you get from red/orange bubbles, so if you play aggressive and get a lot of symptoms, then you'll have more DNA points to work with! Even if laying dormant is a good strategy, the game does reward playing aggressively too.

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People begin to pursue rare "1-in-10000 GOLDEN" memes, which, uh... does this somehow.

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And that was the straw that broke the camel's back. The world is out to cure us in full force! They're way too late, though.

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Memes, uhhh... I'm running out of ideas...

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Environmental hardening gives us full spreading potential in all environments! It's even better than bacterial resilience.

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Shutting down your borders would at this point be more effective than cure progress, world! DANK MEMES CAN'T BE CURED!

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I posted this picture not for the "Black death" message (I am still getting those messages, I'm just not showing them), but to show that Greenland just got infected! Yes!

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Dank memes is indeed global! It has penetrated everywhere but Morocco!

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Avian 2, just to help that in-country transmission(should've gone for something else, now that I think about it...)

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Everyone wants to stop Dank Memes! And they're very close to doing it!

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Not if I have anything to say about it, though. At this point, we're going to start helping our disease along with the symptoms. Coma is another very powerful symptom, giving lots of severity and lethality. Not as much as total organ failure, but its cheaper. The main difference is that it's one of the symptoms that ALSO acts as a minor genetic reshuffle against the cure! Paralysis and Insanity do the same.

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Dank memes is now affecting people's blood. At this rate, it won't be long before dank memes completely rule the bodies of the world's pathetic humans!

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A meme made this happen! It was... a cat meme! That the WHOLE WORLD was allergic to!

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Too late!

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With every country infected, we're already going to win, but this helps us!

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An impossibly bad meme now gives people cancer.

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Memes have reached maximum raunchiness, causing people to sweat like crazy.

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With all these symptoms, countries are breaking down faster than they would in our bacteria run!

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BUT IS IT FAST ENOUGH?

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I think these Dank Memes are working their way up to Total Organ Failure!

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As you can see, our symptoms menu can get REALLY insane in the later stages of a virus run.

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Insanity will help with the cure, and speed up the fall into demise! Dank memes are now everywhere, and the world is being driven insane by their constant intrusion!

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Chuck Norris has appeared and is now ripping apart everyone's internal organs...

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...causing everyone to crap them out!

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Total Organ Failure or no, people are dying EXTREMELY fast, and countries are collapsing fast as well.

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One final meme released to the world sounds the death knell of humanity.

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The USA ironically held out the longest, but now even they are a cesspit of memes! It's too late for India, they're completely gone!

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EVERYONE IS UNDER THE MEMETIC THRALL

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They cured memes 90%, but giving 90% just wasn't good enough!

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Might as well buy a few last symptoms. Why not?

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After that, we only need wait for all memes to do their work.

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Memes began in China, and quickly gained power. By the time the world was truly out to stop memes, they had gained critical mass. By 7-8-2017, the world's death has become official.

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One true final meme is released by the last few survivors, as a testament to humanity's struggle, for aliens to maybe find one day.

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Woo hoo! We did it! That's virus down!

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Fungus is unlocked! Also, Xerophile gives us a small boost in arid environments. Very nice!

Now, what should we name our next disease, now that memes have destroyed the world?

Alright, next we need name suggestions for fungus. I'm sure you'll all be very creative.

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"1% crits" go

And CrashGordon94 is a banned member (the typo might've been to add Shitty Archer Syndrome as a second effective)

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Tanetane Shrooms. (Or dandy)

Funghoul...

Give them death by 1-up Mushrooms! "Yay, an extra lif-" *dies*

Yeah, I don't have any better idea than this.

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Feminazist.

Perfect.

Corrupt Religion? (yes you get what i'm referring to)

Hmmm... maybe the next disease...

Time to ravage the world in...

Plague Inc. Episode 4: Feminazist Fungus

Before we start! Important note!

So, as I said last time, Fungus it the hardest plague in the game. It took me multiple tries. But more than that, it took a lot of offscreen grinding. Grinding for what? Genes, of course. Whenever you beat a level of ANY plague, you unlock 1 gene. So, I did some Virus casual runs to get some more genes. Don't worry, I didn't get all of them and ruin our progression. There was just 1 in particular I needed. Here's what we got:

Ionized Helix: More DNA when Devolving(not that great)

Hydrophile: Gives us more infectivity in humid climates

Rurophile: Gives us more infectivity in rural environments(remember, we can only have ONE of the environment boosts at a time)

Translesion+: Costs to devolve don't increase(I guess, depending on your strategy...)

Sympto-stasis: Symptom costs don't increase

Trans-stasis: Transmission costs don't increase

Patho-stasis: Ability costs don't increase(The one specifically we needed! I'll explain why soon.)

I actually wanted to show screenshots of these runs, but I accidentally deleted misplaced them a bit. Sorry about that.

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Here we go! Now we have three different gene types to draw from, and I'm going to go with Xerophile along with Patho-stasis and Darwinist.

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And now, the Feminazism movement will begin.

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Normally, starting in Greenland is a bad idea. Not this time!

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And here we go!

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Okay, so. For this disease, the special ability is "Spore Burst". It only costs 1 DNA point! We evolve it, and...

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That's right! We spread to a random county on the other side of the world! It seems random because... IT IS RANDOM!

And that's fungus's special power. Transmission through ships, planes, and land is greatly reduced... but in exchange for that, we get a bunch of abilities that let us (usually) infected a random new country!

However, there's a catch. It actually involves something I haven't explained to you yet. Remember how I explained devolving earlier, and how doing it decreases the DNA points we get, and then we get nothing, and then the game makes it cost us DNA points? Well, it works the same for evolving abilities. Specifically, every single time we evolve an ability, the cost of every single other ability goes up by 1 DNA point. Same for transmissions and symptoms, though they're separate.

So, remember how the spore burst cost only 1 DNA point the first time? Well, without patho-stasis, the next one we would buy would cost 2, and then 3, and then... well, you get the point, I'm sure! There are 12 spore bursts, 2 SUPER spore bursts, and 1 special spore ability in total. And we NEED all of them to have any chance of spreading to the whole world within 10(in-game) years!

Cost of all of them with patho-stasis: 21 DNA

Cost of all of them without patho-stasis: 126 DNA

If we did that we would not have enough DNA points for ANYTHING else.

Oh, and since Patho/trans/sympto-stasis are quite arguably overpowered, even in non-fungus runs where they aren't absolutely vital, they make your disease slightly easier to cure, and you can only have 1 at a time. Something to keep in mind.

Fungus is, on the whole, ridiculously difficult for the point in the game we're at, and honestly should be changed. Without patho-stasis, things would be really luck-based.

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Okay, enough specifics! BACK TO FEMINAZISM! If we evolve a BUNCH of spore stuff and then a spore eruption...

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This happens! Even more countries were infected offscreen. We want to do this early on, and then sit tight while the world gets infected.

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Another!

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FEMINAZISM IS GLOBAL! MOO WAH HAH HAH!

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Huh? Oh, it's nothing important.

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One last thing: Spore Hardening. It gives us a big infectivity boost. It SOUNDS like it constantly infects new countries free of charge, but that's a lie.

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We get a few transmissions, too. Their DNA costs have been discounted for us because they're less effective, but they are still important to get!

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This is the world graph after we've released spores everywhere. Notice that even after all of our spore abilities, not even half the world's countries are infected! Spore abilities are totally unreliable on their own-there's not even a 100% chance they'll succeed! You could have 3 countries left in endgame, use 5 spore abilities, and only get 1-2 countries. And that's why Feminazism is nowhere even close to winning yet.

In order to succeed... We have to wait. A lot.

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Feminazism lays dormant, with brief things sprouting up that I have to quickly quash.

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Hmm?

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So, occasionally, a natural disaster will hit the world. It'll kill some people, and also damage their ability to work on the cure... sometimes. Here, though, Mexico has been mostly unaffected.

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Heat, cold, and drug resistance!

And that's all we can do without symptoms. Feminazism shall lay dormant... for now.

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No! Don't do that!

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Feminazism, your time is not yet...

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Scientists discover how to make men and women poop equally, which would placate feminazism. Obviously we can't allow that.

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No! Stop it!

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The UK is 100% infected. Nothing will come of this.

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Feminazism! What have I been telling you! Save these mutations for when they count!

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More damage, not caused by us!

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All the countries have feminazism! We just need to wait a bit more...

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Man, the world is NOT having a good day!

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Okay, FINE! Men and women can cough equally, if that's what you want!

Thankfully, this does not result in our discovery.

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YES! FINALLY! HALFWAY THROUGH 2018, THE FEMINAZISTS ARE READY TO ACT!

(I would have done stuff earlier, but in all my other runs, trying any strategy BUT this resulted in horrific failure.)

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Feminazism will hit, and HOO BOY will it hit hard! It will hit both men AND women!

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I get us all set up for Insanity and Paralysis! I want to be ready when the world starts trying to cure me!

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MOSTLY HARMLESS!? FEMINAZISM TAKES INSULT!

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Here we go!

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The world tries to keep Feminazism down, but it won't stop!

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Beautiful.

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In an effort to stop the spread of Feminazism!? Let's see what chance they have of that...

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I'd say 0%. Yeah.

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As you can probably guess, this message came WAY after the world actually started cure work. The news is tripping over itself trying to report everything!

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They think they can cure us, but we have a plan to stop that, don't we? All men and women will be EQUALLY unable to cure us!

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Oh hey, we can put down a tab that shows the news for the past few days. Feel free to read it!

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FEMINAZISM SHALL RUIN EVERYTHING!

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We put our cure-stopping plan into action, and as a result anyone NOT trying to cure Feminazism is now.

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Ah, but they're too late! The world is halfway dead, and soon countries will begin collapsing!

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Soon, in Iceland, men and women will receive equal wages: $0.00, because they'll ALL BE DEAD.

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We get Coma and Dysentery, the better version of Diarrhea. The scientists can't apply their understanding of Diarrhea to Dysentery, thankfully.

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And before long, we did it! It worked! Men and women are finally all totally equal! Equally DEAD.

Okay, okay, I'll stop.

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Towards the end, the news logs clearly begin to reflect the apocalyptic nature of things.

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We did it! We won! The hardest plague in the game is finished! But next time, we'll be doing a very INTERESTING plague...

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I hope you all enjoyed this politically insightful LP episode!

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But, I once again need name suggestions! For next time: The Neurax Worm is a mind-control worm. Rather than killing the world, we'll be doing something a bit different. What should we name it?

(Urbophile gives us a boost in urban environments)

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Toxoplasma gondii is the obvious first choice.

It shouldn't fit entirely, I guess, so just T. gondii.

Cats videos will be the ruin of all humanity !

Mwahahahaha !

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Berserk Staff. Everyone is berserk and mind-controlled! Don't let the Restore Staff technology be completed!

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I said this once, and I'll say it again.

Hentai.

Also. Feminazism isn't about equality, it's about females > males and attempts to degrade men even further down and make themselves immune to laws and anything that would otherwise bars their "lifestyle".

It's particularly why I hate these sort of people.

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I'll say it again....CORRUPT RELIGION! (yes, i know about that special part of the Neurax Worm, now do eet >:D)

I said this once, and I'll say it again.

Hentai.

Also. Feminazism isn't about equality, it's about females > males and attempts to degrade men even further down and make themselves immune to laws and anything that would otherwise bars their "lifestyle".

It's particularly why I hate these sort of people.

‚ÄčThere is a line between reason and stupidity. They crossed that line a LONG time ago.....

Edited by RandomSwordmaster

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SporePunch Breloom. What could be a worse way to go than falling comatose and having your internal organs pasted by controlled fury!

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Toxoplasma gondii is the obvious first choice.

It shouldn't fit entirely, I guess, so just T. gondii.

Cats videos will be the ruin of all humanity !

Mwahahahaha !

I don't understand... what is this incredibly long name??

Berserk Staff. Everyone is berserk and mind-controlled! Don't let the Restore Staff technology be completed!

This seemed to be the most popular suggestion, so we're doing it!

I said this once, and I'll say it again.

Hentai.

Also. Feminazism isn't about equality, it's about females > males and attempts to degrade men even further down and make themselves immune to laws and anything that would otherwise bars their "lifestyle".

It's particularly why I hate these sort of people.

Ah, I thought it was an insane version of male = female. Well, I guess it is normal feminists on crack, but... still, really, I'm guessing they're just a giant bunch of hypocrites.

SporePunch Breloom. What could be a worse way to go than falling comatose and having your internal organs pasted by controlled fury!

Believe it or not, we won't be pasting anyone's organs today. No, we'll be doing something much, much worse.

Miiiiinnnd control in...

Plague Inc: Episode 5: The Berserk Staff!

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The Neurax worm is the first of three Special Plagues. That's not an official name, just what I call them. Their mechanics are dramatically changed from normal diseases. So, let's see what's in store for us!

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Darwinist and Urbo-Phile because I don't have anything better, and Sympto-stasis because we'll be needing a lot of symptoms.

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A brand new "Berserk Staff Worm" enters the world...

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Somewhere, someone in China is hit with a berserk staff. The mind control to get them to use the berserk staff on more people begins...

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The berserk staff lay in wait to be found... and now, the world shall feel what was hidden...

Neurax Worm Theme

Yeah, it's got its own special music. That's how you know its special!

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As you can see, we're basically a tiny worm right now. A very dangerous tiny worm.

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First off, we'll need transmissions. All the upgrade trees are radically changed, and we're going to need Eggs first. Level 1 of this allows us to get Animal transmissions. Berserk staff eggs go!

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Next up, a, uh, berserk staff range increase! These transmissions are notable because they increase both severity and infectivity. Not too much, thankfully.

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What? Never mind, it's probably nothing important.

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We get Eggs 2. Notice that Devolving this trait costs no less than 6 DNA points! In all the special plagues, devolving traits becomes EXTREMELY expensive, so we have to evolve carefully.

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Time to move onto symptoms. First, the Berserk Staff will need to invade the brain.

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Next, we need to establish who's boss.

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And finally, assume total control. NOW we can start making people do stuff! Thanks to Sympto-Stasis, this all costs very little.

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Our first two upgrades don't do anything but reduce our severity. Remember, these people will ALL become eventual subjects of the great Berserk Staff-we don't want them to suffer too much!

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Next up, Psychosis! We've established control of their personality!

And here, we have a choice to make:

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We can either make people sad, on a path to kill the world (and yes, the upgrade that comes after it is Suicide).

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Or, we can make people love us using brain chemicals!

Of course, doing any of these things would start to make the world really notice us, which we don't want quite yet. So, back to transmissions!

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More berserk staff range lets us make the very water and air berserk!

You're probably wondering what's in abilities...

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Trojan Planes, to help infect the world! What do these do? You'll see.

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We'll also need our normal resistances. Don't know why a magical staff struggles in certain climates, but what can you do? *shrugs*

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Ah, our very first plane! When a country's airports aren't closed, and it has a lot of infected people in it, it'll generate a plane bubble for us! Click on it, and...

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We can send the plane to wherever we want! If a country has closed airports? We can still send the plane there! If the country doesn't HAVE airports? Nope, the plane still goes! That's why our main threat is the cure, not countries closing their borders while everyone outside suffers.

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Go, my Berserk Plane! Go, and make people mad!

Also, as you've probably noticed by now, the coloring is different than the normal red. All of the special plagues each have their own color.

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Another plane! All the countries that would normally be out-of-the-way are now no longer difficult to infect whatsoever!

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Let's get some more planes going!

(I don't get any more plane upgrades, but from here we have some choices: "Trojan Roamers", which increases infectivity in plane-targeted countries, or "Trojan Destroyers", which makes the people in planes attack stuff in the countries they go to.)

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Looks like we've been found out. Better take precautions!

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The entire bottom-right tree is dedicated to cure-slowing symptoms. We don't want to get too many, but this should help counteract our hated enemy, the Restore Staff.

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Not that the world stands a chance as long as we have these planes!

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Oh, yes. No need to worry about it, worrying is bad for you, my servants...

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We have enough people infected now that we're getting planes constantly. I'll stop showing them, but keep in mind that no country can keep itself isolated from the Berserk Staff!

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Why do they try to stop the Berserk staff? Don't they know we have only their best interests in mind?

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Clearly, they need to learn!

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Great. This slows down our planes and infection in general. No matter, we already have plenty of areas infected.

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It's only a theory! Don't focus on it too much. Besides, that's silly, right?

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Oh come on!

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Then again, you can probably imagine why they'd do that. No choice but to keep going!

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Avians will help us spread faster. Spreading quickly is VERY important, due to the ending we've chosen.

(Also, the "worm-circle" in the top-left is another upgrade path that increases mutation. In this disease, controlling what it does is very important, so I chose not to do it.)

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Don't do research on us! Come on!

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How could you EVER think that?

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I guess we don't need airports to leave from... or open airports to fly to... to mind-control people into using planes.

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Devotion! See? I only want good things for my slaves!

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Huh? Obsession! This should help. I wonder why it only costs 1 DNA point?

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...That might have back-fired slightly.

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Crap, that's not what we wanted!

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So, I find it quite coincidental considering that with our name, this is the ONE symptom it decided to mutate... This gives us Lethality, which we actually don't want. Can't do too much about it now, though.

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That wasn't a death from us! That was from someone infected by Berserk Staff beating another uninfected person! How can you link this so perfectly!?

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Now, for our final upgrade... this is what allows for the control ending! People now truly worship the berserk staff. We have tons of severity now, but this upgrade actually removes some lethality. We no longer need to kill people!

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Why don't we take a look at what's happening?

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So, with the "Transcendence" upgrade, all countries that have everyone infected will IMMEDIATELY shift to Total Anarchy, losing all cure capacity. They now worship us!

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We don't have a lot of countries with 100% infection yet, but a few countries still aren't working on curing us as much as they could be. Still, there's no point in laying dormant now.

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Next, we'll want Perceptive Jolt, the first step in another upgrade tree, which should do some interesting stuff...

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Perceptive Shift and Cognitive Scrambling come after. These aren't upgrades we really need for a Worship run, but I get them because they're fun to have! They make countries do a lot of interesting stuff.

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The world is progressing on the cure very fast, and we are NOT infecting people nearly fast enough!

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We need to do something to counteract this...

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Particularly since they know they have to cure us now.

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First, we'll want Genetic Hardening while we spread.

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Crap. IS IT OVER?

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Reshuffle!

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What? The cure is complete?

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NO ITS NOT! MORE RESHUFFLING!

(Yes, you can actually mitigate a complete cure by using Reshuffle upgrades.

Despite this, though, it looks like the world might still complete the cure! We're out of abilities to stop it with, so we'll have to use symptoms!

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(Notice I have a ton of DNA points. This disease gives us way more than normal, which is good.)

First, Memory Loss. You can imagine why this would negatively impact cure research. FORGET ALL YOU KNOW OF THE BERSERK STAFF!

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Sorry to do this to you, servants, but it's for the best! It has to happen!

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Don't talk about the worm! It's not allowed!

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Finally, Coma!

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Alright, the cure is placated for a little while, and we have all the countries infected! We just need to infect more people in the countries...

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But tons of transmissions! Normally we wouldn't need them at this point, but we seriously need our infectivity up!

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With all the countries in the world infected, there's nowhere to send the planes. I have them fly off anyways.

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Almost...

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Almost! Come on! Get them infected before that cure!

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Legalizing Neurax Communities, Holding Neurax Education Sessions...

#NeuraxAcceptance

(Gladiator Combat and Arresting Journalists is from our decision-making abilities, also. In the mobile version, a lot more stuff would happen, including countries re-opening/re-closing their borders over and over for various reasons, but not here, apparently.)

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SUBMIT! EVERYONE SUBMIT!

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That's another cure-slowing disease. I'm glad to have it.

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Almost! And yet, the last few three hundred million people continue their futile resistance...

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Long hair banned? Death racing legalized? All to become normal in the new berserk-staffed world!

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Annnnd we win.

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We did it! Now, the entire world is under the sway of the Berserk staff, no longer to have individual freedom! But they will be happy, due to the manipulation of their brain chemicals!

...This is kind of horrific, actually.

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Alright, that's a wrap for today! Genetic Mimic slows Cure research, which is always nice.

Now, I actually don't need any name suggestions for Parasite! It's already been recorded using an old name suggestion. Instead, suggest names for Prion, a "slow, subtle, and complex pathogen inside the brain" that's hard to cure.

NEXT TIME: The world riots over nothing.

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I don't understand... what is this incredibly long name??

It's actually more a parasite than a worm, though the effects are similar.

In short, it could be the reason why we like cats so much, and why cat videos are so popular.

(It's known to makes rodednt attracted to cat pee, letting them be eaten more easily, and are present in most humans, though there's no proofs of their danger... yet.)

More information here

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Woo! They actually finished the Restore Staff, but a reshuffle made it fail before much damage could be done. Careful: don't want people to wise up and finish it: the thing's almost ready! Now, I better go death racing. See ya!

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Woo! They actually finished the Restore Staff, but a reshuffle made it fail before much damage could be done. Careful: don't want people to wise up and finish it: the thing's almost ready! Now, I better go death racing. See ya!

I prefer to think they accidentally based their Restore Staff off of FE5 Staffs.

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