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Parrhesia
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your table of contents is now official and in the OP

furthermore;

I Think I Found This In A Guardian Article Green Curry Paste
Makes about 500g – enough for two curries.

80g fresh long green chillis, stems removed and roughly chopped
50g fresh small green Thai chillis, stems removed
5 cloves garlic, peeled
½ stick lemongrass, thinly sliced
1 red shallot, sliced
1 x 20g piece galangal, peeled and roughly chopped
1 x 10g piece turmeric, peeled and sliced
30g shrimp paste
20g kaffir lime rind
1 teaspoon ground coriander
1 teaspoon ground cumin
200ml water

1. Place chillies, garlic, lemongrass, shallot, galangal, turmeric, shrimp paste, lime rind, spices and water in a blender and blend to a smooth paste.

2. Store in an airtight container in the fridge for three to five days or freezer for up to two months.

Edited by Parrhesia
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Geeky Spaghetti:

1/4 lb each of spicy and mild Italian sausage

1 can diced tomatoes

1 small can tomato paste (then fill the same can with water and add that)

3 tsp sugar

1 tbsp grape jelly

1 tbsp each oregano, parsley, and basil

1 tsp fennel seeds (grind with a mortar and pestle)

1 lb spaghetti (one box basically)

(optional) Meatballs (I personally recommend turkey personally)

Brown both kinds of meat together in a sauce pot. Add tomatoes, paste, and water over medium heat. Add sugar and spices and stir together. Put on low heat. If you want them, add meatballs here. Put a lid on the pot.

Bring a pot of water to a boil, add salt, and then add the spaghetti. Cook to your wanted level of done-ness. Strain the spaghetti, put it in the pot, and add the sauce.

Eat.

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ok question time

Lemon Pudding Mochi

1 16 oz. box mochiko

2 c. sugar

4 tsp. baking powder

1 3 oz. lemon pudding

3 c. milk (or a mix of coconut and dairy milk)

1 block melted butter

5 eggs, lightly beaten

2 tsp. lemon extract

1 cup angel flake sweetened shredded coconut

The 3 oz. lemon pudding is an instant powder mix sort of thing, right?
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BEEF WELLINGTON B O Y Z:

(don't try to prepare this more than twice a year or else you'll go broke trust me i've tried)

1. Season a bigass slab of choice beef fillet with salt and pepper and pan sear that shit, paint it with some english mustard or something when you're done

2. Pulse some mushrooms or something and get the water out by putting them in a separate pan and letting them sweat the fuck out

3. Line up some prosciutto on saran wrap and throw your dryass mushrooms down so it makes a chunky layer on top and throw the beef right in there

4. Roll it up nice and tight like the it was the slimmest fucking joint you've ever rolled in your life

5. Put it in the fridge for like 20 minutes so your little baby gets to know itself

6. Lay out some puff pastry and center your beef-wrap in there and use some egg wash to glue everything together and roll it the fuck up again

7. Chill it for another 5 minutes and glaze the top with your runny egg shits, and score the pastry so you can let it BREATHE you MONSTER

8. Season and bake til medium rare because you wouldn't be caught dead eating anything else

9. Get stuffed m8

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While discussing the ins and outs of curry making with my good friend Proto, I realized that I neglected to specify the type of potato to use in the curry I posted.

As this is actually rather important, it now been remedied.

This concludes this Emergency Broadcast.

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This recipe isn't mine. It's on a little flier from my local gas company.

Apple Banana Lumpia

- 4 ripe apple bananas

- 1/2 c. brown sugar

- 8 lumpia wrappers

- Oil for frying

1. Peel the apple bananas and cut them in half lengthwise.

2. Roll the halved bananas in brown sugar.

3. Wrap up each half of a banana in a lumpia wrapper. Pretend it's a mini banana burrito.

4. Heat the oil to medium high (I really wish they'd give a temperature for this. . .when I did tempura, oil was measured for "doneness" by sticking a wooden chopstick in there, and seeing if small bubbles formed. . .so, uh, try that).

5. Fry the lumpia until the wrapper is golden brown

6. Drain the lumpia on paper towels.

7. As soon as the lumpia is cool enough to pick up without burning various body parts, serve.

Supposedly goes well with ice cream. Chopped nuts/chocolate chips can be added to the sugar.

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my mom actually does something similar to that, but with the dulce de leche i brought home once from school

it tastes great and i had like a dozen of them two days ago, rip me

anyway for another recipe, have some shakshuka

INGREDIENTS:

  • 1 medium-sized white onion, diced
  • 4 roma tomatoes, diced
  • 4 tbsp tomato paste
  • 4 cloves of garlic, sliced
  • 1 tsp cumin powder
  • 1 tsp smoked paprika
  • 1/4 tsp cayenne
  • 1 tbsp olive oil
  • salt and pepper, to taste
  • 4-6 eggs

STEPS:

  1. mix together the tomatoes, olive oil, spices and tomato paste in a bowl.
  2. in a large skillet, saute the onions and garlic over high heat in olive oil until golden brown; you can add a pinch of salt to expedite the process if you'd like
  3. put in the tomato mixture and continue sauteeing for a bit. once the tomatoes and onions are well-incorporated, spread it evenly over the frying pan's surface. cover, reduce the heat to low-medium, and let simmer for ten minutes.
  4. after ten minutes, you should have a sauce. make holes in this sauce for each egg, and crack each egg into each hole. make sure you don't break the egg yolk.
  5. cover, and cook until the egg whites turn, well, white.
  6. optional: before serving, you can top off the shakshuka with some zaatar or parsley or feta or whatever.
  7. serve with toasted bread.
Edited by I.M. Gei
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While discussing the ins and outs of curry making with my good friend Proto

It's not really mine though. I only started cooking by myself four months ago, and I'm not very good at it. Anyhow, this is Onii-chan's recipe, which is supposed to be easy for beginners craving for a taste of Bangladeshi Chicken Curry:

[spoiler=Chicken Curry]Ingredients

Main Stuff

  • 1 kg chicken
  • 2 potatoes
Earth Mix
  • ½ an onion
  • 1 bay leaf
  • 2 halves of a single cinnamon stick
  • 3 Cardamoms
  • 4 Cloves
Major Spices
  • tsp chili powder
  • 1½ tsp cumin powder
  • 1½ tsp coriander powder
  • 1½ tsp turmeric powder
Minor Spices
  • ½ tsp garlic powder
  • ½ tsp ginger paste
Others
  • ½ tsp oil
  • 2 tsp salt
  • 1-2 cups water
  • [optional] Some coriander leaves
Preparation
  • On a cutting board, dice onions into small cubes.
  • Add the ingredients listed under Earth Mix into a saucer and mix them lightly.
  • Cut the chicken into desired pieces.
  • Bring out the spices and salt and keep them ready. Fill a cup with cold water. Bring out the oil.
  • Place saucepan on the stove, without the lid.
Action
  • Turn stove on high heat, about 75% of the way up.
  • Wait a minute or two and then add some oil.
  • Add the Earth Mix into the saucepan and use the spatula to mix it with the oil.
  • Wait for a bit and then add the spices and salt.
  • The saucepan should be quite hot by now, with oil kinda sizzling. Empty about half a cup of water into the saucepan.
  • Use the spatula to evenly stir the mixture so that none of the spices are clumped in a single space.
  • Once the mixture starts to bubble, add the chicken.
  • Fill the cup with more water and empty it into the saucepan. Stir with the spatula and ensure that most of the chicken is submerged (add more water if necessary).
  • Put the lid on and set alarm timer for 10 minutes
During those ten minutes...
  • Return the spices, wash the knife, teaspoon, and cutting board.
  • Peel potatoes and remove all their skin.
  • Cut potatoes into desired sizes.
  • If you have time, you can wash the knife and peeler.
  • After the ten minutes are up, open the lid and stir if necessary. Then add potatoes, making sure they're adequately submerged.
  • Put the lid on and set alarm timer for 15 more minutes
Last 15 minutes...
  • [optional] Wash a few coriander leaves with cold water and place them on a saucer.
  • Relax as you wait; read a VN or watch some anime or something.
  • After the 15 minutes are up, turn off the heat and move the saucepan to an unused stove plate.
  • [optional] Add the coriander leaves on top of the chicken and close the lid.
  • [optional] Wait for a while to let the heat soften the chicken.
  • Enjoy the chicken curry!
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I think that's my favourite recipe here just because of how clearly regimented and easy to follow it is. Credit where it's due!

(I mean yeah it also sounds delicious lmao - I'll give it a shot at some point)

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It's not really mine though. I only started cooking by myself four months ago, and I'm not very good at it. Anyhow, this is Onii-chan's recipe, which is supposed to be easy for beginners craving for a taste of Bangladeshi Chicken Curry:

proto please write an entire cookbook, your recipe writing style is absolutely fabulous

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Bacon Cheese Potato Skins (my favorite thing to eat alone)

1. Get some potatoes. Russets are cool.

2. Wash the potatoes. Get em' nice and clean.

3. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.

4. Slather those potatoes with oil. Slather them.

5. Bake those potatoes for about 30-40 minutes, until the skins are crisp.

6. Once they're done, take em' out, let them cool a bit, and chop them in half. Then, remove their insides with a spoon, but be sure to leave a little bit of potato inside the skin, maybe a quarter inch.

7. Put the halved and hollowed potato skins back on he baking sheet, and brush the insides and skin of the potato with butter and canola oil. Then put them in the oven again for 5-10 minutes, flip them, and put them in the oven again for 3-5 minutes.

8. Take them out, and put cheese inside the skins. Any shredded cheese will do, but I like cheddar. Also add bacon bits just because. Then put them back into the oven until the cheese melts.

9. Take them out of the oven, and add chopped green onions and sour cream. You can also turn off your oven now, we're done with it.

10. EAT THEM. SHOW NO MERCY

Enjoy~

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Lemon Pudding Mochi

1 16 oz. box mochiko

2 c. sugar

4 tsp. baking powder

1 3 oz. lemon pudding

3 c. milk (or a mix of coconut and dairy milk)

1 block melted butter

5 eggs, lightly beaten

2 tsp. lemon extract

1 cup angel flake sweetened shredded coconut

1. Melt 1 block butter in microwave.

2. Heat oven to 350 degrees.

3. Grease 9x13 in. pan with a nonstick cooking spray.

4. In large bowl, stir mochiko, sugar, baking powder, and pudding.

5. Gradually whisk in milk to beat out lumps.

6. One at a time stir in melted butter, beaten eggs, lemon extract, and coconut.

7. Pour into baking pan.

8. Bake 1 hour or until an inserted toothpick comes out clean.

Yields 24 to 30 squares

Mochiko can be found in the Asian food aisle. It's otherwise known as sweet rice flour.

This one looks pretty sweet (no pun intended), though a couple of questions:

- Do you mix the lemon pudding into the batter so you get mochi paste with lemon pudding flavour? In that case, anything you could recommend for pudding substitution if lemon pudding's not convenient to get a hold of?

- Would mochi wrapped around lemon pudding i.e mochi with lemon pudding filling be a good desert?

Also have a recipe for Vegetable soup with lentils:

For 8 persons:

2 onions

5 garlic cloves

2 squash/zucchini/courgette

1 kg sweet potatoes

1 cauliflower

2 tsp cumin

2 tsp paprika

2 tsp cayenne pepper

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp tumeric

1 tsp salt

5 tbsp grated ginger

2 tbsp pureed tomato

1 can coconut milk

1 l vegetable/chicken stock

4 dl red lentils

2 limes

100 g cashew nuts (if you want)

1 twig of coriander

oil for frying

water

1. Fry finely chopped onions and garlic with some oil in a big pot. Add cumin, cinnamon, paprika, turmeric, cayenne pepper and pureed tomato.

2. Add diced sweet potato, squash and cauliflower, then pour stock and water until it barely covers the vegetables. Boil until tender and mash the soup with a hand blender.

3. Grate fresh ginger into the soup and add the juice of two limes. Add salt to taste. Add the coconut milk and stir. Then add the red lentils and let the soup cook for 10-15 more minutes. Stir occasionally to keep the lentils from sticking together. You can also mash the soup after the lentils are boiled if you want your soup smooth.

4. Serve with finely chopped cashew nuts and coriander on top.

This soup is pretty good for leftovers or freezing for times where you can't be bothered to cook, I lived on this for almost a week once.

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Banned, that lentil soup recipe looks delicious and I can't eat it :P:

This one looks pretty sweet (no pun intended), though a couple of questions:

- Do you mix the lemon pudding into the batter so you get mochi paste with lemon pudding flavour? In that case, anything you could recommend for pudding substitution if lemon pudding's not convenient to get a hold of?

- Would mochi wrapped around lemon pudding i.e mochi with lemon pudding filling be a good desert?

1. It's an instant lemon pudding, so it's powdered. It'll go in with the other dry ingredients (mochiko, sugar, etc.). The pudding is in there for the creamy lemon flavor. I'd imagine it's possible to make it without the pudding mix, but I won't vouch for its consistency/taste. I don't know if it's possible to pull it off with another pudding flavor, because I've never tried it. I've got other flavored mochi recipes, if you're interested!

2. I usually don't do mochi with filling, but that suggestion sounds delicious! I have no clue how to make it, though.

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1. It's an instant lemon pudding, so it's powdered.

That makes sense, I was imaging mashing a pudding into the dry mix which was a bit ???

Instant lemon pudding isn't common over here, but instant powdered lemon jelly is, so I might try this. I have to look a bit harder for mochiko first, glutinous rice flour is easy enough to get, but the sweet variant is a bit more effort.

Personally, I really like mochi so more mochi recipes are appreciated!

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Table of contents for page 2:

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I shared this on facebook with a cousin a little bit ago and thought I would post it here too.

Jacques Pepin: "Onion soup Lyonnaise Style:

From the Lyon region of France, this onion soup is much thicker than the usual kind [no kidding it's like bread soup but I love it]. When I was a young man, I often made it with friends at 2 or 3 AM after returning home from a night of dancing. The soup is strained through a food mill (although this is not essential) and put in a large tureen or casserole that goes into the oven. Once it is baked, egg yolks and some port are mixed together in front of the guests and poured into a hole made in the center of the cheese crust. Then the whole soup is mixed together - both the crust and the softer insides - and served in hot bowls. It looks thick and messy, but it is delicious.

-15-20 slices baguette, 1/4 inch thick.

-3 tablespoons unsalted buter

-3 medium onions, thinly sliced (about 4 cups)

-8 cups homemade chicken stock or low-salt canned chicken broth

-1/2 tsp salt, or to taste

-1/2 tsp freshly ground black pepper

-2 cups grated gruyere or emmenthaler cheese (I think we used gruyere....)

-2 large egg yolks

-1/2 cup sweet port

Preheat the oven to 400 deg. Arrange the bread slices on a cookie sheet and bake for 8 to 10 minutes, until browned. Remove from oven and set aside (leave oven on). Melt the butter in a large saucepan. Add the onions and saute for 15 minutes, or until dark brown. Ad the stock, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil and cook for 20 minutes. Push the soup through a food mill, if desired [we did not do this].

Arrange one third of the toasted bread in the bottom of an ovenproof soup tureen or large casserole. Sprinkle with some of the cheese, then add the remaining bread and more cheese, saving enough to sprinkle over the top of the soup. Fill the tureen with the hot soup, sprinkle the reserved cheese on top, and place on a cookie sheet. Bake for 35 minutes, or until a golden crust forms on top.

Combine the yolks with the port in a deep soup plate and whip with a fork. With a ladle, make a hole in the top of the gratinee, pour in the port mixture, and fold into the soup with the ladle. Stir everything together, bring the soup to the table, and serve.

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Elotes and Italian "Elotes"

Elotes are a type of Mexican Grilled street corn

Pretty simple and straightforward with no real precise measuring needed since you're just coating the corn, just take it easy on the zest since it can overpower the other flavors very easily.

More traditional Elotes/Mexican Elotes

Corn

Cilantro

Chili Powder

Cotija Cheese

Lime Juice

Lime Zest

Mayonnaise

"Italian" Elotes

*The ingredients are direct substitutions for the traditional ingredients.*

Corn

Basil

Red Pepper Flakes

Parmesan Cheese

Eureka Lemon Juice

Eureka Lemon Zest

Garlic Butter

Instructions:

1) Husk the corn if not already done so and remove the silks

2) Build a medium heat fire on a charcoal grill

3) Brush the grill grate with Lime Juice

4) Cook the corn while brushing them with Lime Juice while rotating generously for about 10 minutes until the corn is lightly charred on all sides *About a minute before the corn is done you should roast your start to roast your chili powder this will "wake up" the flavor for when you add it to your Elotes*

5) Quickly coat the corn brush the corn with Mayonnaise (normal butter works if you're opposed to mayonnaise) and grate your cheese generously over the surface and let rest for 30 seconds to a minute.

6) Cover the surface with your warmed chili powder

7) Lightly sprinkle with cilantro and lime zest (Lime zest can have an overpowering flavor for some so a little goes a long way the zest of a single lime wedge should be enough for an average size whole ear of corn)

8) Skewer the corn when cool enough to do so

You can either serve directly at that point or with a browning torch you can slightly roast the outside before serving

Edited by Dwlr
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I'VE NEVER HAD THIS RECIPE PERSONALLY BUT GNOCCHI IS THE SHIT AND I FOUND THIS IN THE GUARDIAN LIFESTYLE COLUMNS GNOCCHI
Serves 4 as a starter/2 as a main

600g floury potatoes (eg russet)
salt
300g plain flour (you probably won’t need all of this)
1- 2 eggs (optional)


1 Scrub but don’t peel the potatoes, boil them whole in salted water until tender. Drain, then put the empty pan back on a low heat until it is dry, add the potatoes and let them dry for a moment, too. Once the potatoes are cool enough to handle, peel them, then pass them through a potato ricer into a bowl, or mash them with a fork. You can also do this with the grating attachment of a food processor. If you are going to add an egg, do it now and mix well.

2 Turn the mixture out on to a floured work surface, add flour to the potato and work it in. Continue adding flour and kneading until you have a consistent dough that no longer sticks to your hands. The amount of flour will vary; the most important thing is the feel of the dough.

3 Dust the work surface with flour, pull off an egg-size lump, roll it into a 2cm-thick rope, then cut the rope into 1cm pieces. At this point, if you want you can make the distinctive grooves with a gnocchi board or by pressing the gnocchi gently on a cheese grater or the back of a fork. Lay the gnocchi on a clean tea towel.

4 Bring a large pan of water to the boil, add salt, stir, then gather up the tea towel so as to gently drop all the gnocchi in at once. Once they bob to the surface, scoop them out with a slotted spoon. Have a warm serving plate and the sauce ready, so when the gnocchi are cooked, you put them straight on the plate, top with the sauce and serve.

Edited by Parrhesia
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Personally, I really like mochi so more mochi recipes are appreciated!

Turns out I need to do some baking, so have another one, courtesy of the University of Hawaii~!

Chocolate Mochi

2 c. mochiko

2 c. white sugar

1 Tbsp baking soda

1 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips

2 cans evaporated milk (2-12oz.)

1/2 c. margarine (melted)

2 tbsp vanilla extract

2 beaten eggs

0. Move the oven shelf to the center of the oven, and set the oven to 350 degrees.

1. Grease a 9x13 baking pan with cooking spray.

2. Melt the margarine and chocolate chips in the microwave. Set aside to cool a bit, so you don't burn yourself.

3. Combine the dry ingredients (that's mochiko, sugar, and baking soda) in a large bowl.

4. Combine the margarine/chocolate liquid with the evaporated milk, vanilla extract, and eggs in another bowl.

5. Slowly pour the wet ingredients into the dry ones, and mix until the batter is smooth.

6. Pour the batter into the baking pan, and bake for 45-55 minutes. If an inserted toothpick comes out coated in liquid, put it back in the oven for another 7 minutes or so.

7. Take out of the oven, and let sit for ~15 minutes, to cool off.

8. Slice it up and serve~!

Should make 24-32 pieces, depending on how it's cut.

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  • 2 weeks later...

The ultimate fucking milkshake which I am drinking right now, 9.49am 01/02/2016

You will need a glass that supports 500ml and some form of blender. I have some kind of hand-held thing.

Throw two bananas and milk into it.

Congratulations! You're most of the way there!

However, it needs more spice, and this is basically your space to experiment however the fuck you want! Vanilla essence works, as does ice coffee syrup. Hot chocolate powder stuff would probably also work!

Either way, two bananas per 500ml of milk will get you something very thick and very creamy and, hell, probably somewhere approaching a square meal. Cannot recommend this enough.

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The ultimate fucking milkshake which I am drinking right now, 9.49am 01/02/2016

You will need a glass that supports 500ml and some form of blender. I have some kind of hand-held thing.

Throw two bananas and milk into it.

Congratulations! You're most of the way there!

However, it needs more spice, and this is basically your space to experiment however the fuck you want! Vanilla essence works, as does ice coffee syrup. Hot chocolate powder stuff would probably also work!

Either way, two bananas per 500ml of milk will get you something very thick and very creamy and, hell, probably somewhere approaching a square meal. Cannot recommend this enough.

...I should get a blender because I really want to try this

Anyhow, I might as well post my recipe for my favorite breakfast:

[spoiler=Cauliflower Egg]Ingredients

  • Half a cauliflower
  • 4 eggs
  • Some water, preferably hot
  • [probably optional?]A tiny amount of oil (like, 1-2 teaspoons)
  • [optional] salt, pepper, or whatever you like putting in your eggs
Preparation
  • Put some water in a pot. The exact amount doesn't matter (I think), but just make sure you have enough water to submerge all the cauliflower florets later. If you're still unsure, just put in a lot of water.
  • Place the pot with the water on the stove and set the heat to High.
  • Cut half a cauliflower into small florets. It's up to your preference how big you want them
Action
  • Assuming you're not a pro at cutting cauliflowers, the water should be boiling by now. Make sure that is the case by checking if you see lots of bubbles in the water while steam comes out. If it doesn't look like that yet, then just wait until it does.
  • Turn off the heat
  • Pour in the cut cauliflowers into the water. Use a spatula or something to make sure all the cauliflowers are submerged (in case they were forming piles or something).
  • Wait for two minutes, or whatever period of time you prefer. The longer you wait, the softer the cauliflowers will get and they'll start to lose their flavor.
  • Drain the water from the pot. If you don't have a fancy convenient way of doing this, then you can always resort to manually pouring out the water into the sink REALLY SLOWLY to make sure the cauliflowers don't fall too. It's okay if there's a bit of water left behind, as long as most of it is gone.
  • Return the pot with the cauliflowers to the stove and drizzle the tiny amount of oil over it
  • Break four eggs into the pot. Yes, four.
  • Set the head to Medium (like half of the way through)
  • Use the spatula to mix the eggs around with the cauliflowers (which should also break the egg yolks)
  • Wait for a bit (like, 30 seconds) until the edge looks like it's getting solid. Use the spatula to break the edge and push the solid-ish eggs to the center while mixing them up with the cauliflower (while liquid egg flows into the edge)
  • Repeat Step 10 until it seems like half the eggs or so are solid
  • Turn off the heat, but don't expect to observe any noticeable effect because the pot bottom should still be hot
  • Continue to repeat Step 10 until you no longer see liquid egg flowing to the edge, which means you're done!
Serves 1 or 2, depending on how much you want to eat for breakfast Edited by Rainbow
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