Story Catnaps

[Tangerine]

"Ah... it's so hot. I suppose I should have expected it... she warned me, after all. But still, this is..." A low muttering, half-caught under her breath. In all fairness, Jill Fizzart knew that such a thing wouldn't really make a difference, but saying it was... somewhat comforting. She had certainly been blindsided by these conditions. She had been told that the dense forest was hot, but this was entirely unlike the arid heat that permeated the Northern desert. Something such as that, she had faced before; had triumphed over, but this? These forests were another beast in their entirety, assailing the Daien-born rider with an impressively oppressive humidity. Even soaring above the treeline, free from her usual segmented armour, wind blowing in her face in a desperate attempt to remedy the situation. Well, it simply wasn't enough. Opening her mouth for but a moment, in the hope of breathing in the forest air, was enough to expose herself to an unfortunate taste of salt, as the sweat pouring from her brow found another place to slink into and call home.

"Ugh... how do they even manage this with those heavy coats? And within the woods themselves, at that..." Jill inquired to no one in particular, a grimace on her face as she began wiping her arm against her brow in the hopes of clearing some sweat from her face... not that it would assist anywhere else, but it was a welcome gesture to her own self, nonetheless. Honestly though, what sort of place was this to live? Trees upon trees with no end in sight, aside from the distant mountains which housed the royal overseers of the region. She had been told to look for a clearing, but as of yet, there were none in sight, and Jill's morale found itself fading rather fast.

"But I suppose it would have to be... Gallia was formed as a haven where the Laguz could escape Begnion, after all..." Jill noted, biting her lip at the unpleasant memories that thought brought about. It was still a bit astonishing to her, than before being told by Lethe of such things, that she had not a single clue. The grim history of the Laguz, which had lead to the creation of Gallia, was one of war, slavery, and slaughter. Jill was certain that the first time she had heard it, her face must have grown as pale, if not more so than the scales of Goldoa's mighty white dragons. Of course, Lethe would never tell her exactly what her expression had been. Whether that was out of an urge to tease, or sheer pity, Jill had never managed to figure out. But it was likely for the best, after all, by this point. Yune herself would likely be unable to predict what sort of chaos might ensue by opening a box that had been forced shut so long ago. But, such reflections would be saved for another time, it would seem, as Jill finally caught sight of the first clearing she had been witness to for miles.

"Ah, could that be it? I certainly hope it is..." She murmured to herself, as she gently shifted the reigns in her hands, directing her mount towards the clearing of the forest. Hopeful optimism soon gave way to a wide grin spreading across Jill's face, as her descent brought a small, homely hut into her field of vision. Oh, she hoped that this was her final destination, the place where Lethe called home, and if not, it would hopefully contain a friendly face. One that with any luck might part with directions of some description. Soon the suspense would come to an end, at any rate, as Jill touched down in the small clearing, and hopped to the ground from her wyvern's back, taking care not to trip herself on a nearby root... oh, what an entrance that would have been, had she done such a thing.

"Excuse me! Lethe, are you here? Am I at the right place?" Jill called out, listening for a reply as soon as her own voice had ceased. A few moments passed, and within them, so many sounds, foreign to Jill's ear, yet soothing, natural... the bubbling of a nearby creek, chirping of the birds and what she assumed was an insect of some description. It was all quite relaxing, and just as Jill began to consider perhaps resting in this place regardless, the reply she had been wanting came echoing from the trees.

"Jill? I see you've made it in one piece, excelle-" The reply began, as Lethe leapt forth from the woods, transforming into her human shape as she touched the ground. Though, with such a prompt, the Laguz had no chance to conclude her greeting, as she found herself practically tackled by Jill, and pulled into a tight embrace. It was the best she could do, to brace herself and keep the both of them from toppling to the ground, her head forcibly buried into Jill's shoulder by the Beorc's strong grip. Such displays of affection were still not her forte, by any means. While Jill had no problems throwing an arm about Lethe's back and waist, before immediately pulling her into some sort of pseudo-death grip, it took the proud Laguz warrior a few moments before her own limbs responded, gently wrapping about Jill's back and giving the rider a light squeeze. However, as soon as it had begun, the embrace appeared to be over and done with, Jill pushing away in a bit of a hurry.

"Oh my, Lethe, I'm so sorry! Ah, I'm so full of sweat from the heat, I must smell absolutely dreadful..." The rider explained, waving her arms about wildly, a mortified expression plastered over her face. Within a few moments, with a look of realization, Jill's flailing ceased as well, her arms firmly planted at her sides, and her face flushing to match her hair.

"No need to worry, Jill. The smell was, uhh... very you. I didn't mind it, so much." Lethe retorted, her own cheeks growing ever-so slightly pink as she spoke, though ever were Jill to catch it, such a thing would be fervently denied until the end of time, if not longer. It had certainly been strong, but Lethe couldn't bring herself to lie about it... Jill just smelled like Jill, and despite the reservations that the red-headed girl had, Lethe could not bring herself to consider disliking it. Swiftly dispelling her embarrassment at such a thing with a shake of her head, Lethe reached out towards Jill, gently grasping her shoulder, a smile forming on her face.

"But that doesn't matter, really. Come inside, you've traveled a long way to get here." Lethe offered, pulling Jill along by the arm towards her abode, getting most of the way to the small hut before Jill offered any resistance, digging her heels into the dirt to stop herself from being dragged any further.

"Even if you think that, I'd still like to wash up, first. I'm rather conscious of it... I heard the sound of water nearby, would it be alright for me to bathe in the stream?" Jill finally interjected, giving Lethe a tug of her own for emphasis. With that, the Laguz stopped pulling her along, at least, turning to look back at Jill.

"I suppose that's fine. There's a path behind the house, it leads straight there." Lethe replied, releasing Jill so that she could go over to her bags. Watching as Jill began to dig through her packed belongings, Lethe's brow began to raise, as the rider's searching seemed to become more and more frantic, the deeper she dug. After a few moments of Jill's movements continuing to escalate, Lethe eventually began stalking closer to the Beorc, her curiousity getting the better of her. Just as she did so, however, Jill retreated from her bags, a defeated expression on her face as she turned.

"Hey Lethe, I uhh... it looks like I forgot the bag I packed my clothes in, uhh... could I maybe... borrow some from you?" She finally admitted, scratching the back of her head in embarrassment, as she began pouting at Lethe. Said Laguz letting out a sigh after a moment, as she turned around and started walking towards her hut, waving her hand almost dismissively.

"It can't be helped, I guess. Wait there." Lethe called back, stepping inside and scrounging around for a few moments, before coming back outside with an ensemble that was rather familiar to Jill, that being what Lethe had tended to wear casually during the war, a pair of slitted shorts and simple top, both in green, though the bottoms were a notably more vibrant shade. Closing the gap between herself and Jill, Lethe swiftly pushed the clothing into the rider's hands, before turning away and back towards the hut.

"Well? Go on, then." Lethe noted, her voice somewhat chiding, receiving a quick thanks from Jill, as the rider walked off towards the brook, humming and with a skip in her step. Lethe couldn't help but sigh again at the prospect of Jill having forgot her clothing at home, yet at the same time, she couldn't really get mad over it. Something was just so earnest about the whole situation that Lethe couldn't help but smile as the sigh passed her lips, laying back and watching the clouds as she awaited Jill's return from her bath...

***

"It's my fault for forgetting, so I can't blame anyone but myself, but these are kind of... tight. Well, Lethe is awful slim, so I guess it's not surprising... after all, she fights and trains in another form entirely, so the fact that she's not all that muscular makes sense." Jill murmured to herself, gently tugging at the tighter areas of the clothing she had borrowed from Lethe, on her way back from her bath. As she rounded the side of Lethe's hut, the rider was about to call out, before stopping herself on sight of Lethe. As cats ought to do, it seemed that lazing in the sun had lead Lethe to take a little catnap of her own, gently snoozing on a soft mat that had been placed in the front of her abode. Giggling gently to herself, Jill sat down next to her friend, before laying herself down on what remained of the mat. She likely wouldn't fall asleep herself, but it was certainly comfortable, and she had no problems seeing how Lethe, who was likely closer to nocturnal then a Beorc would be, might have dozed off. Unfortunately, it seemed that relaxation would be short lived, as Jill's settling in had caused Lethe to begin stirring.

"Well, your hearing is really good, after all, Did i wake you up, sleepy cat?" Jill asked, holding back a chuckle as she did so, while Lethe began to wake up. Still groggy, and already with a bit of a grimace, being mocked in such a way was not what she had been hoping for.

"Shut up... it's just... warm out, and comfortable. Plus, you took forever..." Lethe retorted, stretching as she spoke, letting a yawn escape her in the midst of it all. Soon sitting up, and rubbing at her eyes, before shaking off the tiredness from her body, and getting to her feet. Looking over Jill as she did so, it appeared that the clothing she had provided was, at the very least, functional. It was clear that they weren't exactly the same size, as to be expected, but it would do the job that it needed to do.

"You must be hungry, coming all this way. Luckily, I caught a good sized elk, earlier. It should do nicely, for food." Lethe added, once her mind was cleared of it's drowsiness. She began to start over towards a small cooler where she had stowed the meat, until Jill stopped her by grabbing at her wrist.

"Honestly, left to you, we'd have just the meat on it's own... don't think I haven't seen how you like to feed yourself, Lethe. I brought some vegetables and grain with me, since I figured this would come up. I'll cook dinner, it's the least I can do, forcing myself on your hospitality, like this." Jill noted, eliciting a grimace from Lethe, and a chuckle from the rider herself in retort.

"Yes, to force... vegetables down my throat. Truly, you could not pick a better way to show your gratitude..." Lethe muttered in feigned contempt, her tail fluttering about in the breeze, as her ears lowered, matted against the side of her head.

"Oh come on now, it's not that bad. I swear I'm a good cook, I'll bet I can even get you to like them!" Jill retorted, standing as well, swinging her arms about for emphasis as she spoke, her face growing into a puffed-up pout.

"We'll see about that... but I know you won't take no for an answer, so go ahead." Lethe concluded, giving in to Jill's demand without all that much of a fight, eliciting the Beorc to pull her into a light hug, and leave a swift peck on her cheek, before pulling away with a gleeful spin.

"You won't regret it, Lethe. Hehe, I'll make you eat those words along with everything on the plate, promise!" Jill added, practically glowing. Lethe was a stubborn one, after all, and to get such a concession without so much as any kicking, screaming, or clawing of faces was a miracle in of itself. But if she was gonna pull it off, Jill knew she'd have to make a truly knock-out dish. You did not sway a learned carnivore with a half-assed dish, that was for certain. But at the same time, if she strayed too far, well, it would have the same effect. It had to be something familiar enough to stick, but exotic enough to titillate the taste buds...

"Enough talk of food for now, anyway. If you're going to make it, then make it. I'll admit that you have me curious." Lethe replied somewhat quietly, sitting down near the fire pit, wondering what exactly Jill had planned.

"Alright, well, if you could start a fire while I get things ready, that'd be great." Jill noted, as she began looking over what she had. In all honesty, her options were kind of limited with what she had available. The best bet that she had was likely a stew, it was simple, but Jill knew it tasted good, and it shouldn't be anywhere near offensive to Lethe's palette. With that decided, Jill gathered her ingredients and began to set up the area for cooking, starting with going to fetch some cooking water from the stream in a nice-sized pot. Humming along the way to the nearby flow of water, Jill gathered as much water as she would need, about midway through her trip hearing the sounds of a crackling fire back from the clearing. Turning back towards the hut as soon as she was ready, Jill began carrying her water back with her.

***

"There, I started the fire. Is there anything else you would like, of me?" Lethe asked, as soon as Jill returned with her bounty. The rider couldn't help but laugh a bit, at that. Despite how stoic she wanted to act, it was rather obvious that Lethe was interested in what she would be doing.

"Not really, actually. I'm just going to be making a stew, so I've got it pretty well handled from here. You can relax, or you can watch, whichever you'd like." Jill replied, and almost immediately Lethe had assumed a prime watching position. Well, that answered that, it would seem. It wasn't like she hadn't dealt with an audience before, so without paying much mind to her audience, Jill began cutting the vegetables, as well as setting the meat to sear for added flavour. Humming along the way as she brought her meal along, getting all of the ingredients prepared so that they could be added together for the finished stew.

"That song... it's the same that Reyson and Leanne sung in Serenes Forest, is it not?" Lethe interjected after a time, lazing about in the fading sunlight, listening to and watching Jill as she went. She had an inkling for a while, but she was sure enough by now to say something. Taking a whiff of the cooking meal, the cat Laguz licked her lips in anticipation. When Jill had first said she was going to force vegetables on her, Lethe had assumed something for more egregious than a simple stew.

"That's right. I was wondering if you'd recognize it." Jill replied, as she stirred the pot absentmindedly. By this point, the preparatory work had been completed, and now it was simply putting it all together and allowing the flavours to meld together. Giving it a preliminary taste, Jill couldn't help but smile. Surely Lethe would enjoy this, with how it was turning out. A hearty stew made from fresh elk, potatoes, carrots, celery, onion, garlic, tomato, and fresh herbs? Jill figured there was just about nothing to dislike about that, truth be told. All that needed be done now was let the stew simmer down and thicken, and it would be finished and ready to eat.

"It... does smell good. I'll admit that." Lethe noted, finally cracking under the pressure and smell of the cooking stew. That alone was enough to make Jill feel ecstatic, even at this juncture. If Lethe was saying such things already, then the end result was almost a guaranteed success.

"I'm glad that you think so. It'll taste even better, I promise. And now, all we do is wait." Jill replied, standing up and walking over to where Lethe was resting, sitting down beside her, and taking a deep breath. The smell of food was in the air, the fire was going, and the darkness of the night's sky was starting to set in, the firelight illuminating the surrounding wood.

"It really is pretty, out here. You can see so many stars in the sky, and everything is so serene and peaceful. I can see why you would choose to stay here, even if you hadn't picked it out of necessity." The rider stated, as she settled into a comfortable position, laying on the grass, allowing her hair to flow out beneath her. Such a place was absolutely nothing like the bustling suburbs of Nevassa, nothing like Talrega, or Melior... the seemingly inescapable scope of what people had created, where they had settled. It all seemed so... minuscule, unworthy of mention. Jill felt entirely divorced from the grip of that civilization, and felt her current situation to be anything but lacking.

"I suppose it is. I never took care to notice, after a little while, it was just everyday life." Lethe replied, twirling a blade of grass between her fingers, watching the light bounce from it, as it's facing turned too and fro.

"I guess you do stop noticing after a while, huh... it's the same with everything. You get used to it, and forget how special it really is." Jill agreed, shuffling around a bit, as she had not yet found a position she was fully comfortable with. Eventually settling into one, Jill craned her head towards Lethe, giving the Laguz a smile as she did so.

"But you know, I hope it's not everything. I hope that I can always remember... how special you are to me. You're the reason that I changed everything I felt about the Laguz, after all. I don't want to see the day that I don't regard our friendship as special, anymore." Jill continued, glad for the dimming light and the fire, as it would hide her blush.

"Err... thank you, Jill. You too, showed me something important. That if they are willing to change, all hu-... Beorc, are capable of that. I suppose that you would call that a... special friendship." Lethe replied in kind, also glad for the fire, for a very similar reason to Jill's own. It felt nice, to open up about this sort of thing, every once in a while. So long as it didn't become the norm, there was no problem with having talks like this, from time to time.

"Thanks, Lethe. I'm glad you feel the same way." Jill replied with a smile, before sitting back up, and standing soon after, pumping her fist in the air, to the surprise of Lethe.

"Alright, I'm even more determined now! That stew should be ready, and I am so gonna blow you away, Lethe!" Jill announced with renewed fervour, practically marching over to the pot, so as to remove it from the fire, before ladling out a bowl of stew for Lethe. Along with it came a spoon, and Jill sitting herself directly in front of Lethe.

"Okay Lethe, say 'Ahh~'" The rider demanded, opening her own mouth, for emphasis.

"I am more than capable of eating on m-"

"I said, say 'Ahh~'" Lethe began, before immediately being interrupted by Jill, whose expression had grown decidedly harsh, practically scowling. Lethe was unused to such... forceful demands from Jill, a bit unsure of whether to comply, just yet.

"You're not 'Ahh~'ing, Lethe." Jill announced sternly, her frown deepening. Lethe sighed, nothing good could come of denying Jill further, and thus, despite some reluctance, opened her mouth for the bite of food.

"A-ahh~" Lethe mouthed, and so soon as she had finished, the spoonful of stew had been pushed into her mouth by Jill, an expectant look on the Daien's face. After recovering from the sudden insertion of the spoon into her mouth, Lethe began to taste the stew, savouring it for a moment, before swallowing.

"It's good." Lethe noted, licking her lips as the spoon retreated from her mouth.

"See, I told you~ Now again, say Ahh~" Jill replied, readying another spoonful of stew.

"I said I am capable o-" Lethe began, once again cut off, though this time not by Jill's words, but by her sticking another spoonful of stew into the Gallian's open mouth. Resigning to her fate of being fed, Lethe swallowed the spoonful of food, before opening her mouth again for the next one, much to Jill's audible delight.

***

"I can't believe that I let you spoon-feed me half a pot of stew." Lethe grumbled, rubbing her stomach as she laid on her mattress of soft grass and fur, a groan passing her lips as she stretched, giving Jill a lazy look.

"But you enjoyed it, didn't you?" Jill retorted, having not eaten quite as much, and thus having slightly more energy at her disposal, was still sitting nearby where Lethe had chosen to lie.

"I suppose I did. I still can't believe that it happened, though." Lethe retorted, repeating her previous statement, eliciting a pout from Jill, which continued until the Gallian patted the spot next to her.

"It's getting late, and you'll have been flying since morning. Get some sleep, we'll talk more tomorrow." She noted, curling up slightly, before stretching once again.

"Oh, okay. I'll do that." Jill replied, slowly adjusting herself until she was lying at Lethe's side, her surprise audible as Lethe pulled herself close to the rider, wrapping an arm about her.

"Lethe, wha-"

"The nights here are surprisingly cold. I am used to them, but you will enjoy the warmth." Lethe interjected, before Jill could make her complaint. Accepting the answer for what it was, Jill complied, pulling herself up to her friend.

"Hey Lethe?"

"Yes, Jill?"

"I'm really glad I came to visit. It's been great seeing you again, and finally getting to see your home."

"I agree. It has been good, seeing you again, Jill."

"Thanks, Lethe. Good night."

"Good night, Jill." Lethe finished, the conversation finishing as the small hut grew quiet, in the dark of night. Jill would remain for a few days more yet, but that is a tale for another time.

-Fin

[eclipse]

You've made me hungry for a proper stew.

I hope you're proud of yourself.

[Kakeyo]

A nice slice-of-life tale. Really liked this phrase:

"... such a thing would be fervently denied until the end of time, if not longer."

Made me chuckle. :3

[Meldorn]

That was a really heartwarming piece. Like Kakeyo said, it's refreshing to see a "slice-of-life" piece that is comfortable just describing everyday things. You pulled off a compelling short story without action, or even much of a plot, and let the characters drive the narrative. Well done! I hope you move on to the next round.

[Kinumi]

THIS IS REALLY CUTE i usually don't like romance but i enjoyed reading this very much

[Balcerzak]

All in all, you did quite well, and I'm particularly pleased you did perhaps my favorite Tellius support partners justice. I've got a few comments and suggestions I've spoilered up for you down below though:

original: Something such as that, she had faced before; had triumphed over, but this?

proposed: She had faced something such as that before, had triumphed over it even, but this?

The original sentence was a mess of improper punctuation, and it got in the way. A semi-colon connects two independent clauses (or sets off items in a list if the items contain commas in them), but "had triumphed over, but this?" is clearly not independent.

original: a grimace on her face as she began wiping her arm against her brow in the hopes of clearing some sweat from her face... not that it would assist anywhere else, but it was a welcome gesture to her own self, nonetheless.

proposed: a grimace on her face as she began wiping her arm against her brow in the hopes of clearing some sweat from her face... not that it would come to much good in the end, but just the act itself was a welcome gesture, nonetheless.

It felt like you were trying too hard, or something, with the original line. What exactly was "assist anywhere else" supposed to mean? That by wiping the sweat from her brow she was just moving it around to her cheeks, etc. If so, that's close to the most roundabout way of saying so. The phrase "to her self" also seems a little suspect, I mean, she's obviously not doing it for her wyvern's benefit.

It was still a bit astonishing to her, than before being told by Lethe of such things, that she had not a single clue.

that before

simple typo

though ever were Jill to catch it, such a thing would be fervently denied

though even

simple typo

it seemed that lazing in the sun had lead Lethe to take a little catnap of her own,

had led Lethe

common lead vs led mix-up

original: Humming along the way to the nearby flow of water, Jill gathered as much water as she would need, about midway through her trip hearing the sounds of a crackling fire back from the clearing.

proposed: Humming along the way to the nearby flow of water, Jill gathered as much water as she would need; about midway through her trip she heard the sounds of a crackling fire back from the clearing.

As written it felt very run-on, and the verb in the final segment felt like it was conjugated wrong because my mind kept trying to make it an independent sentence.

Is there anything else you would like, of me?"

you would like of me

no need for a comma

original: It wasn't like she hadn't dealt with an audience before, so without paying much mind to her audience,

proposed: It wasn't like she hadn't dealt with an audience before, so without paying much mind to the gallery,

I've mentioned before in my other critiques (but you may not be reading them all), but I really don't like repeated words next to each other if not done for deliberate effect before, especially when you can show of an expanded vocabulary using synonyms and such.

original: Humming along the way as she brought her meal along, getting all of the ingredients prepared so that they could be added together for the finished stew.

proposed: Humming along the way as she brought her meal along, Jill prepared all of the ingredients so that they could be added together for the finished stew.

"Humming along the way as she brought her meal along," is an introductory clause, which means the rest of the sentence should be able to stand on its own when it is removed. However, "getting all of the ingredients prepared..." can't really do that, because at least to my ears, when your only verb is in the gerund form, it just falls on its face. Obviously, I tweaked a bit more than necessary when switching up the tenses, but I do that sometimes.

Edited February 7, 2016 by Balcerzak

[Xaos Steel Wing]

I loved how descriptive it was, especially towards the beginning. It was a cute character focused story, and I liked the dialogue and interaction between them.