Is punishing your adult child for not getting a job too much?

[buttmuncher.ops]

leave all the baggage at home when working

allowing personal life to affect work is easily noticeable and making a habit of it won't help keep a job or career

"adult" is written in the topic title, so act like one. don't complain about work or ask for babying at work (with the exception of accommodations to perform your duties, IF HR and you think your medically diagnosed needs might not allow you to perform your duties adequately.) if it's "boring," that means it's easy, correct? if you have constructive input on implementation & execution of how you / your team / company can run more efficiently, bring it up in a one on one with your immediate senior. if you see an issue within three degrees of your duties that you feel you can take care of and save your team / your senior time; take initiative, act on it, and take credit for it. otherwise, keep your personal thoughts to yourself while working an easy job, get paid, put it on your resume and move onto the next step in your career which will hopefully be more engaging, challenging and not "boring"

stay positive at all times while on the clock

last of all, your father isn't punishing you for not getting or being able to keep a job. he's punishing you for being dishonest and not taking responsibility. transparency is an issue at all levels in most companies, but that doesn't mean you can't be honest with your family. the "punishment" he's giving you right now of errands / chores, applying + interviews and leading an active life is to teach you to take responsibility for your "adult" life. family won't be around forever to be able to take care of you. the main lesson here, among other minor life things, is to NOT throw your opportunities in life down the drain

time is the most precious, limited resource in the world; how you spend it is completely up to you

goodluck

Edited April 19, 2016 by buttmuncher.ops

[Hero]

Just find something dude. Don't be afraid to tell a white lie or misrepresent your way into a job, it's not like you're gonna get grilled by the FBI. First step is standing up on your own feet. All that other good stuff can come later.

[Augestein]

Just find something dude. Don't be afraid to tell a white lie or misrepresent your way into a job, it's not like you're gonna get grilled by the FBI. First step is standing up on your own feet. All that other good stuff can come later.

That's actually a way to get fired where I'm from. It's better to just be honest and show you're willing to learn than flub a little. Primarily because if you lie, you can still be terminated if you don't make it passed 3 months... Well really, 90 days.

[Esau of Isaac]

It is better to be dishonest and get yourself the job you need, because the majority of the people you are competing against will do the same to some degree, and for a lot of these entry-level jobs the qualifications are not very difficult to bullshit your way through. Worst case scenario you don't get to keep the job, but even in that scenario you still had the job.

[Augestein]

Not really. Losing a job from lying is the worst way to lose one, because it can happen randomly and leave you woefully under prepared for what happens next. Not to mention, if you don't plan on moving, that can float around and you can run into people you've already met before. I hate to say it, but if you can't get a job because of your lack of qualifications, you seriously need to go acquire some skills. Even if those skills are simply things like "I can shoot a bow and arrow with my elbows." Lying is bad, because it makes a horrible start to working at a job.

People will hire you for the most bizarre reasons. Even if you're under-qualified just because they like you.

[Esau of Isaac]

Pretty sure being fired from a job at all will leave you unprepared, the circumstances of how it occurred don't matter. If you need a job, especially an entry-level job, you have nothing to lose by polishing yourself up. Obviously, lying about qualifications that are central to a position is a poor idea (e.g. claiming to know a specific language for an interpretation gig), but making things up that are only passingly true is an excellent way to increase your odds of getting a foot in the door. I briefly learned C++ eight years ago, being taught by a friend. He listed me as having worked with him in his site, and I added it to my qualifications. I couldn't tell you the first thing about it, but if it's at all helpful to get me a job I'm looking for then you can bet your ass I'll put it on my resume and polish up my skills when necessary.

Car dealers get away with lying every day. If you don't have the shiniest bumper, why not claim you have some kickass airbags or some shit, I don't know I'm bad with analogies.

[Augestein]

Pretty sure being fired from a job at all will leave you unprepared, the circumstances of how it occurred don't matter. If you need a job, especially an entry-level job, you have nothing to lose by polishing yourself up. Obviously, lying about qualifications that are central to a position is a poor idea (e.g. claiming to know a specific language for an interpretation gig), but making things up that are only passingly true is an excellent way to increase your odds of getting a foot in the door. I briefly learned C++ eight years ago, being taught by a friend. He listed me as having worked with him in his site, and I added it to my qualifications. I couldn't tell you the first thing about it, but if it's at all helpful to get me a job I'm looking for then you can bet your ass I'll put it on my resume and polish up my skills when necessary.

Car dealers get away with lying every day. If you don't have the shiniest bumper, why not claim you have some kickass airbags or some shit, I don't know I'm bad with analogies.

But that's not lying if you said that you had experience with it. And you would have technically been an apprentice to his work. So there's no fudging going on there. Unless you just plain wrote "I worked with C++ for years," and then in the interview said "yeah, I'm good with C++ because I've done it for 8 years." That's lying.

That's redirecting the buyer's attention to more appetizing aspects-- that's not lying by playing up the car's stronger aspects. I mean, if you got fired, you probably wouldn't write that down on your resume for instance, but you might still say that you got experience in whatever it was you were doing.

[Esau of Isaac]

Of course there's fudging going on there. I don't understand anything about C++, and barely did when I learned of it six years ago. At this point I know less about programming language than I do about the migration habits of bonobo monkeys. When the earlier mentioned car dealer claims their car is the best in the world, they don't actually mean it. They're just making use of puffery. Similar deal.

I'd agree that plain lies are an ineffective way to keep a job, so long as they're relevant to the position. But half-truths are more what I was referring to anyways.