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SullyMcGully Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 On 9/12/2017 at 10:10 PM, DefaultBeep said:  Hide contents Hey you. Yes, you. The one going back and reading through this thread from the start. Hi! How's it going? I just wanted to hop back in time myself for a moment, and this seemed like a fun way to do it. Would you agree? Please rate this on a scale of five stars. Your feedback is very important to me, as I always strive to improve myself going forward. Anyway, why did I decide to go and edit a random post of mine? Call it nostalgia. Call it boredom. Heck, call it a fresh way to squeeze a lemon; I frankly don't care what you call it, because I have no idea what I'm doing myself. I just had the thought today, May 1st in the year of 2018, that leaving a sort of time capsule in this thread could be fun! But leaving this in a recent update in the thread seems pointless. I think we're on page 421 now? Sorry you missed page 420 by the way, Snake Drifter. But that's neither here nor there. Leaving this where everyone can easily see it feels... I dunno, boring I suppose. What's the point of hiding something for people to see, if everyone would see it as soon as it appears anyway? There's no discovery in that kind of act! There's no reward! Finding this edit in this way, you've stumbled across something that isn't already noticed as soon as it's born. Shame it's not something more worthwhile in that case, eh? But I have nothing of worth to give, so unfortunately my nonsense ramblings are all I can leave behind. I hope my time on this site, on this forum, in this thread, has been worth it. Did my being here accomplish anything? For myself, I would say it has accomplished more than I ever could've imagined... but that's not important. Have I done anything for anyone else? Am I an okay friend to the people that I consider to be friends? Have my words, my actions, left any impact at all? I dunno. I hope so, but even if people tell me I have left an impact, I don't think I'd believe it. I feel like I've done so little... do I even deserve the honor of affecting the lives of others? And I don't mean in grand ways, like drastically shaping someone's future, for better or for worse. Those are nice, and I'd be honored if anyone said that I've done that too, but I don't consider that to be the most important kind of impact. Rather, have I made people laugh? Has anyone read what I've said with a smile, or walked away from a conversation with me, being happier than they were when they started? Was any of my advice in the Heroes forum helpful? Were any of my pre-release speculations in the Warriors forum interesting to read? Or am I just speaking into a void, where others have the option to see what I say, but decide against it, instead continuing on with their lives as if I was never even there? On one hand, the thought of others not being affected by what I say is downright terrifying... but on the other hand, I would rather be ignored than potentially hurt anyone. If helping someone laugh or smile is the greatest blessing to me, then making someone sad or upset is the worst nightmare I can imagine. Although it's probably too prideful of me to even assume that I could have anything close to that level of influence on anyone... I'm not special. I'm as boring and ordinary as it gets. I'm not exciting, I rarely do anything worthwhile, and I don't imagine that'll change in the future. But then, that's why I hope I can leave something for others to gain from. I have nothing to expect for myself, and hardly anything to give, but what I can give, I want to give freely. So many people in this forum have helped me with who I am... helped me to sort out my own stupid thoughts and anxieties, and to become more comfortable with the person I am, and the person I want to be. Can I even pay back that kind of amazing blessing? I have no idea, but I pray that someday, maybe, I can make it up to everyone who has helped me. And hey, if you happen to be one of those people... keep this post between us, alright? I wouldn't want my reputation, whatever it is, to be ruined too quickly after just one person finds it. Of course, you don't have to keep this a secret at all, I won't stop you if you want to tell people. Just consider this a personal request of secrecy I suppose, if you'd be willing to listen to my request. Also... thank you. No matter who you are, if I've seen you or talked to you at all, I can promise that you mean more to me than I could truly express. I'm sorry that I don't thank people more often for just being around, but I really and truly care about you, even if I'm too much of a shy, nervous idiot to say it. ...What was I talking about again? Oh, right. Please rate my silly idea to edit an old post of mine, and if you got anything at all out of my pointless rambling monologue... well, I just hope it didn't waste your time too much, and I sincerely apologize if it did. I guess maybe I didn't want to edit an old post purely for the mystery of it... it's just easier to ramble about my thoughts if I think no one else will be able to find them, instead of making a new post for everyone to immediately see, haha. I'll probably regret this as soon as I post it to be honest, but whether I'll bother deleting it, who can say. Except me, of course, heh. But if this has been a waste, then I'll take my leave now, and let you get back to something actually enjoyable! 121. I just caught this. @DefaultBeep 347 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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