Jump to content
Valmese Soldier

How would you improve the story of Fates?

Recommended Posts

So gameplay-wise Fates is wonderful. The only flaws I really notice with that is that Birthright and Revelations don't have that epic challenge feel that Conquest does, but other than that, it is fantastic for FE. However, while I liked many of the characters, the story of them felt a bit... weak to me, but I felt like there was promise to be had here. How would you improve the story of Fates in general? What are some missed out opportunities for pre-battle dialog between one of Corrin's units and a special unit in the field, and what would they say in such pre-battle dialog? How would you make some characters done better, such as character arcs?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ah, time for this topic again huh. Welp, here are a few of the basic "quick fixes":
 

  • Completely remove Valla and Anankos. As it stands, those two plot elements don't only negatively impact Garon and Azura in particular, but also the entire conflict between Nohr and Hoshido.
  • Garon should be human, both literally and figuratively. He can be a harsh and ruthless man but still value his nation and children. This means it'll make more sense for the Nohrian siblings to be loyal to him.
  • Nohr's reasons for fighting need to be made more obvious - working the resource angle would be the easiest way to do this. As it stands now, as much as we may wish otherwise, Nohr are the bad guys and Hoshido the good guys.
  • Speaking of Hoshido, while it doesn't need to be made edgy or anything, needs more flaws. "Not helping out Nohr" isn't a big enough flaw, and most certainly not grounds for them to be attacked. Internal conflicts and problems are more interesting than them not wanting to trade with their warmongering neighbors.
  • Corrin needs a lot of fixes. Not only should the naïvité that comes from growing up sheltered from the world have a bigger impact on them, but they should also be allowed to make mistakes and change their world view. 
  • Reduce the number of siblings; as it stands now, way too many of them are superfluous while simultaneously making it so that they're all the central focus of the conflict that engulfs two entire nations. Half of Birthright shouldn't be walking around aimlessly in search of two people.
  • Make the Hoshidans related to Corrin by blood - seriously, this is the premise of Birthright, and the fact that it's not a bigger deal is baffling.
  • Remove the children and focus more on side missions that help flesh out the world and its inhabitants. Bonus points if it's relevant to the war between Nohr and Hoshido.

Those are some of the quick fixes that I feel are necessary and that I often see repeated whenever this topic shows up.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm fine with Birthright being the good guy route but Conquest should have made a more pragmatic and cutthroat Corrin. Instead we got the same Corrin in all 3 routes and Corrins naiveté just glaringly stands out in conquest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My suggestions will look similar to Thane's.

1. Remove children. If you want a story that spans generations then do that, but don't invoke time travel to keep everyone the same age. That was barely acceptable the first time they did it.

2. A little nuance goes a long way. Tactics Ogre gave us a multitude of factions with competing but very human interests rooted in historical precedent. This isn't usually the Fire Emblem way of doing things and that's okay, but Fates sold itself on providing multiple frames of reference on the same conflict and instead gave us cardboard characters that were impossible to relate to. There was no identifiable morality, aside from the cult of Corrin.

3. Speaking of, get rid of Corrin. Imagine this: Corrin is excised from the story entirely, and instead we follow around Xander. This would put us, as the player, on the other side of the typical Camus/Eldigan/Perceval dilemma. We have to make the same sorts of decisions they do, and perhaps finally get some perspective on why a good man might fight on behalf of the quintessential oppressive, expansionist military power. It could touch on themes of patriotism and loyalty and honor. That was the Conquest I wanted to play.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, Thane said:

Garon should be human, both literally and figuratively. He can be a harsh and ruthless man but still value his nation and children. This means it'll make more sense for the Nohrian siblings to be loyal to him.

Garon should have been this:

Spoiler

latest?cb=20150702204808

The Demon Lord Odin of Odin Sphere. He's powerful, ambitious, cunning, and his own agent to the end. Yet, he is a douche of a father, he admits to this, but is never really repentant on the issue (he might be at the very end- but consider his situation at that point). He does let somebody live who he really should have crushed between his hands, but that gaffe aside he's a man of conquest who can be admired, but never loved (except for the one lady and possibly another who fell for him). He has a daughter who loves him deeply, a second child who has an estranged relationship with him but who really doesn't hate him, another kid who wants him dead, and a fourth whose opinion of him we don't really know, but who did serve him loyally.

 

Fates could use a whole lot of improvements.

Beyond getting rid of Gooron completely, reducing him to a feverish mental influence on Garon could work as well. 

Here is one idea for giving Hoshido flaws is to make it out as less than perfect. Think of it like this: Sumeragi dies suddenly, Mikoto fears little Ryoma will be the tool of evil daimyo in his Regency and beyond, and then fights a civil war to "protect" (maybe the daimyo weren't totally in the wrong) him. The daimyo dislike Mikoto because she lacks royal blood- the consort of the king should step aside now that he is dead. China and Japan knew famine too, make it so that just when Nohr turns to Hoshido for food at the pivotal moment which ultimately sends Corrin to Nohr, Hoshido had just the past year come off a series of bad harvests and even with a good one in the present year, couldn't spare foodstuffs. Another thing we can do is politics with the Kitsune, Wolfskin, Wind, Fire, and Ice Tribes- make it tension-ridden for both Nohr and Hoshido, indigenous minorities vs. giant powerful states is a fun topic.

Some of the children characters are likable and salvageable (make Shiro a royal cousin for one), but Deeprealms were an awful idea and the kids only exist to pander to the Awakening crowd. Their Paralogues do make the possibility of meaningful sidequests that do contribute to the greater world impossible.

Dropping royal siblings? That'd be a tough one, but to remove two, make it Elise and Hinoka. I think we can slash the retainer count though, that way we're free to have more characters who contribute more to the world. As for whose retainers go, I can't come to an easy answer, but probably Odin, Selena, Peri, and Effie on the Nohr side, with Kagero, Setsuna, and Hana dropped on the Hoshidan. Gunter and Reina shouldn't be ones either.

Mikoto needed to live longer, and be a questionable villain in her own right in the story. Sumeragi should have been Corrin's father, and at least Takumi and Sakura should have been Corrin's full siblings. BR's premise is undone by Awakening pandering taken to another extreme.

Revelation, if it deserves to exist, should have been handled much differently, because as is, it is superior to the other two routes in outcome. It takes Heirs of Fate to undo the wrongs of CQ and BR if I heard right. Make it bittersweet (which all routes should be), Corrin flees to a neutral kingdom in the north called Valla, who then becomes entangled in the Nohr-Hoshido War. Corrin helps fight with Valla and ultimately becomes royalty there or something. Corrin amends relations with both Nohr and Hoshido, but is never able to return to either a royal.

Azura- less mystery, less magic, more an actual character. And give her a retainer- it's odd she didn't get any despite being practically a Hoshidan royal.

We need metric tonnes of world building and lore. Fates has a potentially interesting world, but it isn't. Nothing is ever explained.

Let's shatter the Yato! Let's exterminate the First Dragons! Let's downplay everything magical and make humans and human agency, not destiny and degenerate dragons, the heart of the plot! Magic should be just a tool of humanity, not humanity a tool of magic!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's hard for me to improve the story of Fates due to all the constant criticizing since the game was announced has made me very numb to Fates in general, but that's another story.

  • Instead of Mikoto dying of Ganglari, she becomes heavily injured to that later the the story she reacts to  Corrin's decision.
  • Valla is the precursor to Hoshido and Nohr
  • Dechildify most of the  second generation. I like most of them as characters.
  • I actually want to keep all the royals.
  •  Make an map of the Fates would, not the Google map one.
  • Give all the royals a moment in the spotlight.
  • Elaborate upon the various tribes.
  •  Make the nonroyals have a level to focus to them, like in previous Fire Emblem games.
  • Instead of Corrin raised in a castle, he/she was raised in the isolated city in Nohr.
  • Make Azura have her own hidden agenda instead of a follow.
  • Get rid of Iago and Hanz earlier in Conquest. Or make Iago more of a schemer for Garon.
  • Make Kaze have a better reason to join Corrin in Conquest.
  • Make more playable character bosses in all routes.
  • Make Anankos a dying first dragon that doesn't want to die like his brethren. But wishes to live, by absorbing energy of the Fates world.
  • Anankos is not the father of Corrin.
  • And some of the other ideas mentioned in the thread.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

* Remove the option of choosing sides and rewrite the entire Revelation path. 

* Make Corrin their own character rather than another Avatar. If anything is left open to change, leave it at gender.

* Make Valla a known, albeit ruined, kingdom rather than something hidden in another dimension with some ridiculous curse. This would make the skepticism about the involvement of a third party far more valid.

* If the route split is kept, then upgrade Azura to Lord status. Birthright would follow Azura, Corrin would follow Nohr, and Revelation would follow them both.

* Keep Azura and Corrin’s Vallite heritage, but only on their mothers’ side. Otherwise, their heritage is strictly Hoshidan and Nohrian respectively (since they’re already associated with those kingdoms anyway). And while I’m at it, remove the switcheroo. 

* Play up Hoshido’s xenophobia more and make Nohr’s figures more sympathetic.

* Keep the Royal families’ relationship to the dragons but take away Corrin’s ability to transform (since that was such a big-lipped alligator moment anyway). I realize this would require a major design overhaul but since Corrin’s more “unique” characteristics aren’t addressed anyway, it wouldn’t cause that much outrage.

* Have the revelation of Azura and Corrin being cousins double as the revelation of the two being Valla's last heirs. 

* Rewrite Anankos' motivation. Maybe he destroyed his kingdom out of spite for the fact that people were losing faith in him? What if the war between Hoshido and Nohr started because he found out that Arete and Mikoto had lived and had assassinated them (while making it look like the other kingdom was responsible)? And what if he was so paranoid of his sovereignty being challenged that he proceeded to target Azura and Corrin, who know nothing of his existence at that point, because they are the only ones left who can take that power away from him?

 

 

Edited by Corbin

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There are a few changes here and there that I think would help, but the major one that sticks out for me is to not have Corrin as the sole lord of the story and instead one of 3; the other being Ryoma & Xander respectively for their own paths, with Corrin acting as a deuteragonist, akin to Robin in Awakening. Seeing the war play out through the high/crown prince perspectives could have explored otherwise untouched/not touched enough aspects to the overall world, in my opinion. For instance, I'd like to believe that a good part of Xander and Ryoma's character roles [should] come from their relationship to their fathers. Xander has his, but is told instead of shown, while Ryoma surprisingly has nothing, other than wanting to surpass him. Doing so could have opened up the potential for him to be seen as a Michalis archetype to contrast Xander's Camus that over the course of their sides gets gradually deconstructed. Which actually brings me to another thing:

The chapter where Mikoto dies could have been replace by Sumeragi dying instead, which would set up the stage for Ryoma in either path to develop into his role in the war, be it good or bad. 'Course, that would also mean having to re do his death scene as well, which instead could result in serious injury.

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's all well and good to discuss plot elements that need to be changed, but that was far from the only problem Fates had; a major issue is a more subtle one, namely that all paths are effectively straight, narrow paths set on auto pilot. What I mean by that is that things seem to just happen as Corrin and their ragtag bunch of misfits make their way to their goal which is known right from the get-go, barring maybe killing Garon in Conquest, but we the players knew that would always be the end goal anyway. 

A frightening amount of the chapters in Fates are just filler. Corrin goes through some random countries, duchies or areas of Fateslandia and gets attacked, a sibling gets sick, someone wants to test them or something along those lines. Very little actually has to do with the plot; as long as they can reach Ganon/Anankos, they're gucchi, which is bizarre to me. There's no talk of tactics, getting allies, maintaining the morale of the men, etc. - hell, even powering up the Yato just sort of happens without them really going out of their way to try.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Thane said:

A frightening amount of the chapters in Fates are just filler. Corrin goes through some random countries, duchies or areas of Fateslandia and gets attacked, a sibling gets sick, someone wants to test them or something along those lines. Very little actually has to do with the plot; as long as they can reach Ganon/Anankos, they're gucchi, which is bizarre to me. There's no talk of tactics, getting allies, maintaining the morale of the men, etc. - hell, even powering up the Yato just sort of happens without them really going out of their way to try.

Ah the good memories of RD, particularly Part 3, where almost every battle had some form of war room or discussion of the best course of action. PoR had a fair number too, and Awakening had its strategizing moments in the Plegia/Gangrel and Valm/Walhart Arcs too.

All FEs have some form of filler fights:

Spoiler

Many of FE7's fights are just ambushes by the enemy, which makes sense insofar as the enemy to attack in FE7 isn't a big empire. Some of these ambushes are more justifiable than others, Kinship's Bond being a less ideal one. The Hector Mode exclusive Crazed Beast is among the most fillery ever "Hector thought the Black Fang took the Fire Emblem here, he was wrong, on to the snow fortress!" and the game makes one of the biggest efforts ever to hype up and fail a 1 chapter generic boss. And I just had an epiphany, the entire Bern Arc in FE7 is filler! Since Nergal doesn't need the quintessence from a war between Lycia and Bern to open the Dragon's Gate. He used just Elbert successfully before, and later does it with just the quintessence taken from top BF members later once he recaptures Ninian. No Nergal scheming in Bern does mean that Eliwood and co. don't save Zephiel, which means they win no favor which gets them directions to the Shrine of Seals. But Roy found it without any help, so why do they need it? Guinevere told Roy? They didn't outright say it, and Murdock's big army is arrayed there like he knew Roy would be passing through and not like it's just a contingency force.

For FE9- the Begnion Arc (C14-17) is filler-ish, but it is this arc that ends up getting Elincia the army she needs to fight back against Ashnard. That is better than Ike being appointed head of some Crimean equivalent of SoV's Deliverance and fighting back successfully with just remnants of an army. So it's defensible.

For FE8, most of the monster battles are filler or filler-ish (Eir 11-12, Eph 11-12, the Gorgon nest fight), as is Eir 9.

For FE10, it's Part 4, namely the Hawk Army chapters and Ike's second battle, which are fillery. Though the lore, chats, and little revelations (Sanaki not being the true Apostle, Hetzel) are pleasant. Part 2 is filler, but the short story is so good I'd never give it up. The end of Part 3: 12-Endgame, feels forced just to lead into P4, though not exactly filler.

FE6 has its Western Isles fights as the filler, it would have been cool if Roy ended up being King of the Western Isles at the end, which a beta version of the story might have done.

FE4- Well Integrity recently called out C1 as filler, which is probably fair since it's a whole chapter of bandit bashing, but at the same time it does give us Shannan and Deirdre- very important characters in the scheme of FE4. And you need some filler to slowly add and digest new information, and to extend things that should be prolonged, throughout the series.

FE5? I don't know.

FE11- Most chapters are Marth moving somewhere while the enemy just reacts to him. So I don't know what to call filler and not filler here, beyond certain chapters like conquering enemy kingdoms, liberating Archanea and Altea, saving Hardin and Nyna, and getting Starlight. 

FE12- Anri's Way is filler-ish, although it does end with Marth getting the Lightsphere needed to defeat Hardin, so it has a purpose.

FE13- Valm! No surprise here, everyone knows this. But hey, they got the Geosphere/Vert out of it at least. Thousands dead just to collect one green jewel, which reminds me- why is the Falchion sealed? And why is it Tiki has to tell Chrom and co. about collecting the Gemstones? Why didn't Lucina who FP shows knew about the Awakening ritual? Why didn't she and her cohorts travel around collecting them for Chrom during the Plegia Arc and in the year between it and the Valm one?

 

This does not at all excuse Fates profundity of filler however. It is a common criticism that "nothing happens" in Birthright- you find two brothers, and charge into Nohr, making a pit stop for a Yato up. That is it.

Revelation is just excuse after excuse to recruit everyone in the first half, and the second half is a trip into Valla. A land in ruins, lifeless (literally you just fight ghosts over and over), desolate, featuring one boss three times over without any of the panache of a SRW villain you fight ten times over. Half the maps are kinda pretty, but the other half is dull. Your foe is very charismatic (sarcasm), and has anyone else ever noticed the land beneath Valla doesn't look at all like Nohr and Hoshido? What the heck is it and why is it there?

Conquest starts not so bad, but then devolves into getting Garon to dump his facade on a royal throne (and why is Hoshido's so special in the first place?). The Wind Tribe and Kitsune weren't in the way to Shirasagi. If you look at the map, C18-21 (Izumo-Kitsune Hamlet-Wind Tribe-Eternal Stairway) is a zigzag movement- how is that efficient for any journey military campaign or not? And why bother the Wind Tribe and Kitsune? Aren't they neutral parties in the conflict? And who would pass through the Wind Tribe given the narrow and windy paths we see when we fight them on CQ and Rev, and the sands on BR's battle with them? Mount Garou makes no sense in BR's movements either.

Then we get into Paralogues. Instead of use all these bonus chapters to build the world or extend on the relevant conflict, they exist just to add the children (and hint at Anankos I guess). A criticism I also made of FE13 and its Paralogues. Optional fights should have some greater significance, it doesn't have to be huge like Night of Farewells in FE7, but something.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just follow the pitch we were presented before the game was released: A royal torn between two lands has to choose between joining his bloodline who are defending themselves from Nohrian aggression or sticking with the conquerers out of loyalty.

Instead, what we got has Corrin blood related to neither set of siblings and the Conquest campaign trying yet failing to present Corrin as some dark hero trying to find a better way until he takes part in an unprovoked invasion of a peaceful kingdom for some amazing plan he can't tell his Hoshidan siblings about. Conquest should be a SELFISH path where you really don't give a damn about justice for Hoshido or "the greater good", you're sticking with the home you were raised and family you actually remember (no cheap amnesia please) over strangers from some kingdom you don't know.

Enough of the Children can be turned into non-Children. Iago and Zola become one character. Revelation (and by extension Anankos with Valla) gets taken out totally or gets seriously revamped to be less of a forced Golden Ending and Anankos to be less of a forced plot device villain. Corrin actually gets to kill off the opposing side's royals who don't die beforehand. Garon is contempous of Corrin but not over-the-top about it.

Edited by Kalken

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh sweet Jesus.

I actually have a huge treatise on what I personally would do to fix Fates's story, but the problem is that it borrows some elements from my as-of-yet unfinished narrative let's play, so I can't actually go over them here until I finish that or I risk spoiling a pretty big plot twist in my story. But basically it goes the route of making both sides sympathetic and following a noble cause.

However...

Upon playing Conquest more, a second idea for how the Fates story could have worked occurred to me, though not actually in Fates.

I actually think that Conquest would have been really interesting as a stand-alone game with a lowered emphasis on Hoshido and more of an emphasis on the politics of Nohr, and Corrin's attempt, with his siblings' cooperation, to take Garon down from within the system. Some sort of Game of Thrones style political thriller of subterfuge and deceit where you help the children of an evil empire stop their country's fell legacy once and for all, with Corrin being the last remaining member of the conquered bloodline of the divine dragon heroes. You'd have to balance doing the right thing and not getting caught defying Garon, the sorts of things Leo talked about in chapter 14, except actually shown and put into practice like in chapter 2. But again, the most important thing is that the siblings have to be in on it. They have to recognize their father is a monster who has to be stopped, because having it just be Corrin for the entire game leaves the other main characters absolutely no room to grow and develop as characters.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You touched on it, but a key problem with Fates's narrative is that too much is going on for how many Chapters actually advance the plot. I mean, at the MINIMUM the game has to split itself between 3 overall conflicts:

1. Hoshido VS Nohr.

2. The quest to reform Nohr.

3. Valla/Anankos/Faceless/Azura

Conquest works as a key example of this. Not only does the narrative have the problem of trying to keep Corrin as a paragon ala Marth, but it also has to fit in fighting Hoshido alongside working against Garon. Conquest has to resort to contrivances like Azura's Mirror Happens To Stop Working Before She And Corrin Can Show It To The Nohr Siblings So Corrin Needs To Invade Hoshido To Stop Garon just to have Corrin's Army fight Hoshidan characters after he's been established to not wish to do so.

Edited by Kalken

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Having to choose a side - great.

But make it an actual story choice, not "Birthright's story sucks less, Conquest has great gameplay, and Revelation is sandbox mode".  I really like the idea of a third route, but the execution jumped off of the bridge along with the rest of the cast.  I don't mind Birthright's story as much, because it's the tried-and-true "one kingdom goes into another kingdom to tell them to lay off".  Conquest had a lot of different paths - hell, have Garon split the siblings (butter up Xander, push Leo away, etc.), and then have Corrin pick up the political pieces.  Revelation also had a bunch of different, better directions it could've gone in.  Instead of some mystical third kingdom, have one of the neutral nations go rogue, and have them cause mayhem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I might be in the minority with that, but in my opinion, Birthright's plot is perfectly fine. Nothing extraordinaire, but not terrible, either - it's basically your average FE framework of the Evil Empire invading the Good Kingdom, with the added twist that the lord has close ties to the Evil side of the conflict. There are certainly scenes and character interactions that could do with a rework (I find BR!Xander horrible, for example), but as a whole, the plot would work as a standalone.

Conquest either needs a much, much more grey Nohr or a less asinine plan to overthrow Garon. Right now, CQ!Corrin just makes one horrible decision after the other which I found extremely frustrating to watch. Possible improvements could be the Nohrian siblings plotting to remove Garon from the throne (or maybe at first trying to remove Iago because they suspect that he corrupted Garon, before realizing that Daddy's gone to the dark side), or Corrin somehow trying to enforce peace or at least a truce between the kingdoms. But the current "save Hoshido by killing all the Hoshidans" plot is just dumb to its core.

Not sure about Rev - it's just too much of a mess to think of a way to improve it without throwing the whole concept of a invisible malevolent power influencing the war between Hoshido and Nohr out of the window.

Edited by ping

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 10/9/2017 at 8:52 PM, Alastor15243 said:

I actually think that Conquest would have been really interesting as a stand-alone game with a lowered emphasis on Hoshido and more of an emphasis on the politics of Nohr, and Corrin's attempt, with his siblings' cooperation, to take Garon down from within the system. Some sort of Game of Thrones style political thriller of subterfuge and deceit where you help the children of an evil empire stop their country's fell legacy once and for all, with Corrin being the last remaining member of the conquered bloodline of the divine dragon heroes. You'd have to balance doing the right thing and not getting caught defying Garon, the sorts of things Leo talked about in chapter 14, except actually shown and put into practice like in chapter 2. But again, the most important thing is that the siblings have to be in on it. They have to recognize their father is a monster who has to be stopped, because having it just be Corrin for the entire game leaves the other main characters absolutely no room to grow and develop as characters.

I considered such an idea. I don't think all the siblings have to be in on things though. Elise is innocent and apolitical. Camilla- does she display any political interest or ability as is? We're left with Xander and Leo, but this is workable.

Leo becomes the one who Corrin works with. Leo is the one who sees their father's madness and for the sake of the kingdom he once loved, has to stop him. Leo organizes the resistance and opposition forces for the day of overthrowing Garon. Elise and Camilla can be added to Leo and Corrin's side later on, but not at the start, with Camilla being the bigger concern Leo has of the two of them that they would leak information to their dear brother Xander.

Xander remains the loyal son and will not be easily convinced to overthrow his father. Hence Leo and Corrin somehow have to tiptoe around one of the people who know them intimately and the best. On top of escaping the surveillance of Iago the corrupt Prime Minister seeking to use Garon for his own ends, Garon himself, and Gunter- elevated to Garon's most prized and loyal (but not in the least corrupt) general.

Conquest then becomes fight after fight of doing Garon's bidding, while trying to cautiously assemble allies across Nohr and Hoshido and keeping their forces intact for the long awaited day of rebellion. Ice Tribe, Flame Tribe, Wind Tribe, Kitsune, Wolfskin, Cheve, and even after much convincing, Hoshido. Once in a while, the battles turn from being against the enemies of Nohr to a scrap in the shadows with Iago's men.

Eventually, the coup is launched, Xander as was feared it may be the case stays by his father, and everything disintegrates. But from failure, enough is salvaged to keep the hope of open rebellion, if not a quick coup d'etat, alive. Fighting hard against the many forces still loyal to Garon, Xander eventually betrays his father thus causing a tidal shift in the flow of the battle and now it is Iago and Garon who are placed on the defense. To salvage a final victory Garon turns himself into the Dusk Dragon Incarnate, but falls, regaining a moment of clarity in his death, and thanks his children for their disobedience- which is true loyalty.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thinking about it, you really don't need to change that much about conquest to improve the story. Just some quick thoughts:

1) Make the war less black and white with both factions using dirty tactics. For example, ch 17 ninja's should have been employed by corrupt Hoshidian officials. Make it clear that Hoshido has been using ninja to sabotage the Norhian economy which exacerbated the tension between the nations.

2) CH 18, make it clear that Zola is going to wipe out both royal family. Zola is secret working for a rival Nohr Prince whos one of the general bosses in the map. The plan of this rival prince is to wipe out both royal family's winning him the war and removing his rivals for the heir apparent. Saving the Hosidian royals teaches them that the Nohr royals do have honor and both sides gain a sense of respect for the other. This will better set up the ending where the surviving Hosidian royals are on good terms with the Nohr royals.

3) The final chs have Hoshido in chaos as Garon tries to crush the capital. Ryoma defeats Garon but not before Garon completes a ritual that cause Ryoma to be possessed and a portal to open from which the mysterious invaders enter this world.  A fully possessed Takumi goes on a berserk rampage with the mysterious invaders. You fight Ryoma but in the end he kills himself to break the curse. As he dies, he begs you to stop Takumi and save Hoshido. You face Takumi on the other side of the portal to close it and defeat him. Afterwards, Xander promises to help rebuild Hoshido and the surviving Hoshidan Royals are shocked that their bitter enemies have become their saviors but are thankful and gracious none the less.

See, not much really needs to be changed to make conquest's story decent. Its really the ending that needs to be revised the most. But you can keep all the key elements. The plot itself wasn't bad but the execution of the story was terrible.

Edited by wissenschaft

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...