Corrupt a wish: FE edition

[XRay]

Granted, but the Taguel dies and gets eaten.

I wish Fire Emblem was the series that got axed instead of Advance Wars.

[DragonFlames]

Granted, but this forum wouldn't have existed and we wouldn't be having these kinds of "what-if" scenarios. Also, no Forum Games, no funny/interesting discussions, no interesting member interviews, no nothing.
Okay, now I made myself sad...

Alternatively, future Advance Wars titles would have dropped every pretense to be anything BUT a waifu simulator and would only be missing the naughty-naughty-hanky-panky scenes to be a full on [word redacted, started with "p-", ended in "-orn"] game. Fanservice up the wazoo and every Ecchi Anime trope under the sun in one atrocious, buggy package!
And before anyone asks: yes, I do love coming up with silly euphemisms for German number 6.

I wish the next Fire Emblem would bring back some of the more over the top attack animations in the series, like GBA Knights, Generals and Swordmasters.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  The animation takes up so much processing power that it causes the game to slow down to 1 frame per second.  Also the animations that would have indicated a critical hit before are completely random as to whether they actually do critical hit damage or not.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game was a waifu simulator that was a full on porn game with fanservice up the wazoo and every ecchi anime trope under the sun, every character in the game got their own individual harem, full of well written characters that had supports consistent with the story, had no DLC or expansions due to the overwhelming amount of content in the game, was well received by the entirety of the Fire Emblem community despite being an atrocious, buggy package, while despite all of this, it becomes the highest selling Fire Emblem game that attracts several million new players who use this particular game as their entry game to the franchise.

[Hawkwing]

Short answer, in Spanish: No

The longer answer is that Fire Emblem looses its dignity in the process, the other games in the series are forgotten about, leading to an entire generation of gamers forgetting the foundation of the SRPG genre, and the game leads to an increase in the porn industry, which leads to an increase in rape, sexual assault, human trafficking, STD's, illegal fetishes, further decline in respect of the opposite gender, and an overall decline of morals in society worldwide.

DragonFlames isn't the only one who can corrupt wishes in that area. Although that corruption was asking for it.

...

I wish that chain swords (think Kratos) were a ranged option for, well, swords.

[Ercdouken]

Granted, they have super long range, high hit, and ignores weapon triangle, making them very broken, and making any units who can't use swords obsolete.

I wish Volke had more support options in Path of Radiance.

[DragonFlames]

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Short answer, in Spanish: No

The longer answer is that Fire Emblem looses its dignity in the process, the other games in the series are forgotten about, leading to an entire generation of gamers forgetting the foundation of the SRPG genre, and the game leads to an increase in the porn industry, which leads to an increase in rape, sexual assault, human trafficking, STD's, illegal fetishes, further decline in respect of the opposite gender, and an overall decline of morals in society worldwide.

DragonFlames isn't the only one who can corrupt wishes in that area. Although that corruption was asking for it.

Ho-leee garbage pile. I think this right here is the evilest wish corruption ever in the history of anything.

1 hour ago, Ercdouken said:

I wish Volke had more support options in Path of Radiance.

Granted, but they're all with characters he has zero chemistry with, so the supports are terribly written, because the writers need to make stuff up, which makes him look worse than he actually is.
(He isn't. Volke is a pretty cool character and I wish he did have more supports, but you know IntSys and many supports...)

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Free wish time!

I wish the next Fire Emblem game would make the next user give up on the franchise but allow the franchise to gain 10 new customers as a result and the same is applicable to every toher user who follows the previous user.

[WeAreNewcastle1053]

Granted, those ten new customers gained (for every user here that gives up on FE) actually do more harm than good to the franchise, and they tear FE apart and lead it in the wrong direction, towards fanservice and waifus and etc. to the point that FE ends up becoming R18+ (or the equivalent in your country) and becomes a pile of rubbish that IS cancels and even tries to erase from history when they finally come to their senses, even the previous games since they'd been somehow tainted by these crappy new games. And the users here that gave up on FE, including myself, can only sit back, watch the chaos unfold, and say; "I told you so..."
*sigh* I sure hope I did that one justice!

I wish Ryoma would stop subtly haunting my FE Warriors game... *awaits certain ruin*

Edited April 21, 2019 by WeAreNewcastle1053

[Hawkwing]

Granted. Now he's haunting every other device you own, forcing samurai facts any way he can, and trying to convince you to use Ryoma and Ryoma alone.

On 4/21/2019 at 1:28 PM, DragonFlames said:

Ho-leee garbage pile. I think this right here is the evilest wish corruption ever in the history of anything.

I mean, the universe imploding could be considered worse. The corruption I gave does go into more detail, though, and probably isn't too far from the truth. Shit like that does affect the people who engage in it, whether they know it or not, and it's never for the better.

...

I wish that there was an animation about Stahl, Kellam, and Donnel (and why not add Donnels mother while we're at it) taking a trip to a mini-golf course and playing through the whole thing.

[WeAreNewcastle1053]

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Granted. Now he's haunting every other device you own, forcing samurai facts any way he can, and trying to convince you to use Ryoma and Ryoma alone.

...

I wish that there was an animation about Stahl, Kellam, and Donnel (and why not add Donnels mother while we're at it) taking a trip to a mini-golf course and playing through the whole thing.

Granted, but the course itself grows incredibly dark and edgy and at the end they get brutally murdered by a creepypasta-esque Ryoma and you get redirected to some dark web page which puts a virus on your computer which then forces you to play the mini-golf course itself which then leads to a brutal jumpscare from a Grima-possessed Ryoma and your computer is finally bricked because the hard drive explodes. It happens to many other viewers worldwide, which forces IS to not only pull all Fire Emblem titles from the shelves and erase Awakening, Fates, Heroes and Warriors from history, but they have to pay billions of dollars in compensation to the traumatised viewers and are even tasked with the exorcism of quite a few of them, which of course, puts them out of business. Then a zombie outbreak occurs...

Isn't that the most evil wish ruin in the entire history of the universe?

 

I wish there were more opportunities for me to do evil wish ruins like these.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  Your corruptions only get worse and worse until people decide to stop taking you seriously until the point where you find yourself in an existential crisis with this thread wondering, "Why am I even doing this anymore?"  to where you decided to back away in shame and reflect to yourself in a long period where you are forced to look inward to yourself and try to discover what it is that caused you to head down such a dark path and contemplate how it was that you allowed yourself to fall so far from grace as a human being on this thread until another Fire Emblem game comes out and you finally find yourself inspired to wish for new corruptions again and are ready to head once more into the thread with a new sense of inspiration of corrupting more wishes... Only to find out that all of your ideas were already taken and that you now have no idea of what to do and you find yourself all the way back to square one.  Cycle repeat.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game catered as hard as possible to the fans who play the franchise for its difficulty, had drab black and gray aesthetics without a hint of anime influence, had no female characters who could be waifu potential, had the writing staff that wrote Planescape: Torment putting in their best effort ever, was 50 chapters long of gray/gray morality between all game factions, had no support conversations, had no bugs or technical difficulties, had only one DLC pack to include Archanea characters without any Awakening characters, and was the first game in the series to have superb writing while complementing the one ending in the game where the villain wins.

[DragonFlames]

Granted, but the "Elitist vs. Casual" divide will only get deeper and way more toxic instead of semi-joking and ironic like it is now. See Dark Souls/Bloodborne/Sekiro.

7 hours ago, Emperor_Siegfried said:

Granted.  Your corruptions only get worse and worse until people decide to stop taking you seriously until the point where you find yourself in an existential crisis with this thread wondering, "Why am I even doing this anymore?"  to where you decided to back away in shame and reflect to yourself in a long period where you are forced to look inward to yourself and try to discover what it is that caused you to head down such a dark path and contemplate how it was that you allowed yourself to fall so far from grace as a human being on this thread until another Fire Emblem game comes out and you finally find yourself inspired to wish for new corruptions again and are ready to head once more into the thread with a new sense of inspiration of corrupting more wishes... Only to find out that all of your ideas were already taken and that you now have no idea of what to do and you find yourself all the way back to square one.  Cycle repeat.

... Get out of my head, please.

11 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

I mean, the universe imploding could be considered worse. The corruption I gave does go into more detail, though, and probably isn't too far from the truth. Shit like that does affect the people who engage in it, whether they know it or not, and it's never for the better.

True enough, I guess. The key is to have the mental strength to not let things you see in fiction affect you in that way.

I wish Fire Emblem games were longer to have the opportunity to give every character ample screentime and/or to really flesh out the world. 20-25 chapters just don't cut it sometimes, I feel.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  All of the characters who are given more screen time all die on the chapter that it occurs on due to plot reasons and then their influence in the story is never brought up again and at the same time all of them are rendered pointless by big reveals in the plot to where it turns out their deaths could have been avoided if they didn't make a wrong move that the plot already determined they were going to make in the first place.  On top of that, the main character receives all of the credit for everything that his/her compatriots all struggled to achieve over such a long and arduous journey that their names are all forgotten like grains of salt falling into the ocean which the main character reflects on is the case and knows that s/he can't reveal all of their contributions to the conflict because doing so would break the fragile best outcome that was so hard fought and earned.  This story then prompts a bunch of fanfiction writers to take up the plot and struggle to find a way to maintain the same plot without killing the characters but then come to find that the plot only works when the characters die no matter how anti-climatic or meaningless they might have been seen at the time.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game would divide the fanbase so hard that it would ignite an eternal war between casuals and elitists over what the better side of the franchise is and IS only looks on laughing all the way to the bank with the hundreds of millions of dollars they make when they see the fanbase's deterioration into an anarchy of fans strangling each other.

[WeAreNewcastle1053]

Oooh, now you're asking for it!

Granted, this division in the fanbase only gets worse and worse, eventually leading to a imminent World War III (or IV, whichever you prefer), which drags in people who dislike or haven't even heard of Fire Emblem, causing mass destruction worldwide. After the war, priests and governments, aware of the cause of the war, summarise that all video games are unrefutably the number one cause of violence and ban them all, even going so far as to destroy all electronics, including computers that people just use for work, and even executing all employees in the video game companies, including IS, leading the world back into the dark days where fun is completely and utterly banned and there are those horribly boring church services with priests yawning into the microphones.

 

I wish that someone would make an article on the Fire Emblem memes that need to die.

Edited April 25, 2019 by WeAreNewcastle1053

[DragonFlames]

The article proceeds to list off all of them and gives very compelling reasons that not even the most hardcore memer can argue against.

Oh, wait! This is wish corruptions, not fulfilments! Er, uh... The list becomes a meme itself! There!

I wish Three Houses to be the best Fire Emblem yet. If only to get IntSys to stop shoving Fates in our face at every opportunity.

[Hawkwing]

Granted. Now IS won't stop shoving Three Houses into every Fire Emblem related event, no matter what it is about.

On 4/23/2019 at 4:19 AM, DragonFlames said:

True enough, I guess. The key is to have the mental strength to not let things you see in fiction affect you in that way.

I see. I disagree from a certain point of view, but that's because everything we watch can have some influence on us, whether larger or small, and we either agree or disagree with what is being promoted in our culture. There is more serious discussion to be had about that, but that's for elsewhere (it also goes into the conspiracy theory route more than I'd like, even if it's not as out there as other examples).

***

I wish that there was a skill/ability/character that could make an illusion of oneself, and affect the hit rates so that the enemy has a chance between attacking the duplicate, hitting the real one, and missing either.

[DragonFlames]

It is either stupidly overpowered or utterly useless with no middleground. Either way, it's fates'd.*

*fates (adj.) = a seemingly cool concept with an execution so terrible it is hard to put into words.
(to) fates (sth.) (verb) = to screw up a concept (good or bad) so bad, people will still chuck up all over themselves in rage several years later.
Everyone, let's make this a thing!

I wish the next FE game wasn't fates'd.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  Now the next game in the franchise goes a step further to where it's subtitle manages to become the next phrase that people want to use to the point of where no one even jokingly uses the phrase "fates'd" anymore.  Despite this the game manages to bring in ten million new fans who use the new game as an entry point to the series and are now dedicated fans of the franchise and bring in more money for IS than they could have ever imagined and it motivates them to focus more on this said demographic who becomes super loyal and dedicates itself to purchasing everything IS develops afterwards.  This results in the disgruntled portion of the fandom being cast to the side for good as a portion that does not get to have a feeling of being cared about at all and are now forced to rely on the rom hacks made by fans wishing for a series of releases similar to the ones of olden times only to find out that Nintendo gets even more serious about cracking down on these rom hacks than ever before and ensuring they never reach the hands of other players.  Thus it results in this portion of the Fire Emblem community to go sit and sulk in the corner next to the Melee fans and be bitter forever about how they'll never get another entry like the one they want while the rest of the fandom moves on without them.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game would kill the franchise and make IS go bankrupt and force Nintendo to go on a mission to erase all mentions of Fire Emblem from existence.

[DragonFlames]

Granted. Now Nintendo makes Pokémon the next "waifu" franchise and it will be every bit as weird as it sounds. Also, Moemon becomes a legitimate thing.

To be clear, I don't have any problems with nor objections to having dating sim elements in FE. Heck, one of my favourite games is Stella Glow, which is basically FE meets dating sim done incredibly right and I genuinely think future FE titles should take notes from Stella Glow on how to properly implement the whole dating sim aspects.
Nor do I have issues with the avatar system. Nor do I think Corrin is the worst thing to happen to FE (they can't be, because Innes, Sain, Inigo/Laslow, Soleil, Kiragi, Forrest, Sully, Kjelle, Donnel, Ricken, Hayato, Sothe, Soren, Peri, Charlotte, Jakob, Dwyer, Azura, Hinoka, Leo, Takumi, Ryoma, and Xander are a thing).

I wish Fire Emblem had less groan-inducing, unfunny memes (and yes, that includes "fates'd", even though it's not a meme yet).

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  Now the memes are among the most clever and inciteful ones to ever be written but since they get posted everywhere on the internet every 24/7, their value truly deteriorates and they aren't anything special anymore.  Thus resulting in the most groan-inducing, unfunny, and dankest of Fire Emblem memes to become the most sought after ones by those who manage to get so tired of seeing so much of the supposedly good ones everywhere.

2 hours ago, DragonFlames said:

Granted. Now Nintendo makes Pokémon the next "waifu" franchise and it will be every bit as weird as it sounds. Also, Moemon becomes a legitimate thing.

So like this or like this?  Or just flat out like this?  Whatever the direction I think it would only increase the appeal of the franchise... Some more than others obviously.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game was a literal currency maker so that everyone in the world would be able to print their own money and then bring about a collapse of every economy in the known world so it could revert the human race all the way back to the stone age.

[DragonFlames]

Granted, but it doesn't revert humanity back to the stone age. In fact, the collapse of the economy leads to a nuclear war that ends with the Earth's total annihilation.

... This is getting out of hand, isn't it? Let's try for a good ending to that story, shall we?

The collapse of every economy means the end of wage slavery and employee coercion around the world, ending the rule of corrupted politicians and corporate executives, since they have nothing to hold people hostage with. All corrupt politicians and corporate executives are promptly executed publicly, ushering in an era of lasting peace where people can truly work together to build a society that doesn't need money to function and where greed is a sin of the past. Instead of focusing on competition, cooperation is now the name of the game and humanity finds a way to quickly advance technology to reverse the effects of the man made climate change (natural climate change still occurs, though). Thus, a utopia is born where all people can live together in harmony.

I wish the next FE had an ending like that, actually.

Edited April 26, 2019 by DragonFlames
Forgot to make a wish. Whoops.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

59 minutes ago, DragonFlames said:

Granted, but it doesn't revert humanity back to the stone age. In fact, the collapse of the economy leads to a nuclear war that ends with the Earth's total annihilation.

... This is getting out of hand, isn't it? Let's try for a good ending to that story, shall we?

The collapse of every economy means the end of wage slavery and employee coercion around the world, ending the rule of corrupted politicians and corporate executives, since they have nothing to hold people hostage with. All corrupt politicians and corporate executives are promptly executed publicly, ushering in an era of lasting peace where people can truly work together to build a society that doesn't need money to function and where greed is a sin of the past. Instead of focusing on competition, cooperation is now the name of the game and humanity finds a way to quickly advance technology to reverse the effects of the man made climate change (natural climate change still occurs, though). Thus, a utopia is born where all people can live together in harmony.

So............ Wish uncorrupted?

1 hour ago, DragonFlames said:

I wish the next FE had an ending like that, actually.

Granted.  It comes at the cost of the most well written and likable characters in the history of the franchise all dying anti-climactic deaths that all of the non playable characters cheer for and proceed to give them the least dignified ways of being remembered that a human can endure while the players are left to be aggravated that the playable characters couldn't get a happily ever after like they thought they deserved.  On top of that, player's cant take solace in fanfiction reinterpretations since they continue to be shot down by Nintendo who manages to find a new one every 3 minutes after they've been posted or reposted.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game was released for the Nintendo 64 Disk Drive.

[Hawkwing]

The story, characters, and mechanics are all some of the best in the series. Unfortunately, the controller and button arrangements are unintuitive and the roundabout way you do simple tasks adds up fast. They also go overboard with the combat animations, as the frame rate slows down to single frames per second, and some of the spells cause the game to outright crash. Due to a programming oversight, the latter can happen even with the animations turned off.

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem game that had similar writing to the Lego Movie franchise.

[Comycat_Aleu]

4 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

The story, characters, and mechanics are all some of the best in the series. Unfortunately, the controller and button arrangements are unintuitive and the roundabout way you do simple tasks adds up fast. They also go overboard with the combat animations, as the frame rate slows down to single frames per second, and some of the spells cause the game to outright crash. Due to a programming oversight, the latter can happen even with the animations turned off.

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem game that had similar writing to the Lego Movie franchise.

Granted, but immediately after Nintendo ceases making FE games in favor of making cheap merchandise.

 

I wish there were tons of previous beast units all in one game, and they were balanced and well implemented.

[Hawkwing]

The beasts units are fun to use, well written, and manage to find that sweet spot between being useful without being overpowered. The human characters, on the other hand, are shallow, rare, and are either completely useless or one-man armies.

I wish/hope that Alm's brave alt doesn't have his infamous Gaiden armor.