Jump to content
SMEDIA

Corrupt a wish: FE edition

Recommended Posts

Granted, you miss every opportunity to ruin them when someone pops up to claim the corruption.

I wish Seliph would be awakened to find himself in Middle Earth where he would be selected by Nick Fury as Captain of the U.S.S. Enterprise to lead the war against Voldemort and the First Order in their evil plan to awaken Unicron to harvest all intelligent life in the galaxy by teaming up with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to infiltrate the Matrix to compete in the Hunger Games against Jack Sparrow in the Jurassic World theme park only to find that Buzz Lightyear was manipulating Elsa to make Batman enlist the help of James Bond to eliminate the X-Men from finding the next Blade Runner before Conan the Barbarian can make King Kong compete in a Street Fighter tournament in the newest Land Before Time sequel to see if SpongeBob SquarePants had a chance to expose the Simpsons as Power Rangers trying to find out which one of the Flintstones was Doctor Who and prevent the Last Airbender from joining the Walking Dead from being written into the Death Note before finding out that Shrek was the inevitable conclusive choice of who was masquerading around as Hannibal Lecter this whole time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but it' in a game that Kaga desigbed to be annoying and therefore is nearly impossible just because kf BS mechanics he threw in for fun.

 

I wish for Berwick saga to be considered a canon fe game by nintendo and therefore could be in heroes.

Edited by Benice

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but the only characters they bother with are Volcens and Disaad. They are both so true to game it results in Volcens implementing unnecessary time limits on your team, and Disaad coming with no equipment whatsoever. Both end up being more of a handicap than a help consequently. I wish that this wish gets corrupted. Checkmate.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Grnted, but the only way to go onto maps is by participating in a 15-minute face-petting session with Volcens every single time while Disaad says "Get a room, you two!"  And they also change Vanmillion to Vanthreepointonefour and add him as a replacmement for Loki with the same clothes.

 

I wish for the 1812 overture to be a map theme for the next fe game.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, Piotr Ilich Tchaikovsky raises from the dead and demands full royalties of 100% profit from the game and demands that not only the game but every piece of media that follows has to comply or it will be erased from existence when he dies approximately 7 hours after his temporary life back in the living.  Also once he dies, the money disappears as well so everyone is left poorer for what has been saved.

I wish Dorothea and Mercedes would sing Bella Notte to one another in the sweetest and most pure singing they can muster while laying with one another drenched in the water of Glowing Pond under the full moon with nothing but their soaked clothes and a bottle of wine between them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

... I think @Emperor_Siegfried just let us catch a glimpse into the depths of his fantasies concerning certain Fire Emblem females. I approve!
Your wish is granted, BUT both Dorothea and Mercedes get into an argument over who sang better, resulting in the two of them fighting with no clear winner. Said fight brings about a cataclysm that ultimately ends up in all of Fodlan being consumed by a vortex of dissonant tones and voices, ultimately drowning the continent in the screams of innocents. This in turn causes Fodlan itself to gain sentience, and it enslaves most of its inhabitants to nurture its desire for more human screams, leading to its brainwashed underlings brutally torturing the survivors until they die a slow, painful, agonizing death.

I wish for a prequel to Three Houses detailing Alois' career in the Knights of Seiros after he became Jeralt's squire.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but has so little story and really feels hollow, as well as containing a host of game-breaking glitches. Oh yeah, and it costs $30 AUD as DLC, when it's really not worth it.

I wish that Ryoma had the ability to remember all the save files someone creates in a Fates game, and reacted accordingly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted.  All he can do is say one word before getting cut off and then can't do anything to change his fate no matter what the outcome for him was whether it's him being the boss character or someone being careless and getting him killed.

I wish Ashe and Yuri would be the models for a nudist art class where they would be in very suggestive poses embracing one another and after class hours would "brush up" on their own skills to make sure they didn't go soft.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, Fire Emblem gets banned forever for child porn and all of Intelligent Systems are thrown in jail for paedophillia. Everyone who has ever played Fire Emblem then gets unfairly tracked down by the police and registered as paedophiles and the only way to escape is to burn all your electronic devices or bury them deep underground. That's what you get for ruining my wish to the point that I'd destroy my Fates games if it were real.

I wish there was a fatal glitch in Conquest Ch. 25 that caused the 3DS to immediately crash should the player manage to defeat Ryoma.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted.  Now Xander does the same thing in Birthright, making Revelation the only Fates game that doesn't have this game breaking feature.  There is also now a universal balancing act that must be enacted where every individual who has played one must find another to play the other or play the opposing game themselves.  If this balance is not maintained, Satan will be unleashed from an overcooked steak and Bob will drown everyone in hyper-realistic blood while Toph does a blind lets play of Hitler.exe. 

I wish this scene would happen in Three Houses:

Cloud is Dimitri, Andrea is M!Byleth, Madame M is Manuela, Aerith is Ingrid

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted but Ingrid dies immediately afterwards when Sephiroth!Cornelia sets her on fire. Reeve! Rhea then turns into a dragon and eats M!Byleth and Manuela.

I wish FE 4 and 5 got worldwide remasters.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but they only updated it to play on the Nintendo 64 in all its 3D glory, and the worldwide translation is in Braille.

I wish that it Three Houses didn't take around 60 hours to get to the timeskip portion of the game.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but the game starts directly at the timeskip and you lose some of the plot.

I wish there was a female hawk laguz character in the Tellius games.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but he gets killed by Catherine one chapter later, because he must pay for his betrayal.

 

I wish you could S support people with each other in echoes yourself

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted.  All of the S-supporting you do only results in all of it getting completely sidelined for the sake of the outcomes that are already predetermined.  On top of that, the S-supporting with people other than the ones already preprogrammed results in negative buffs.

I wish famous literary authors through all time would be transported to what would be their favorite FE worlds.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, but their families are transported to the favourite FE worlds of the authors too, and are brainwashed by and working for the main villain

 

I wish Fire Emblem Path of Radiance was put on nintendo switch onlime virtual console

Edited by Gordin

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted.  Nintendo sees the scalping prices on Ebay and decides that it's perfectly fair to charge $200 to purchase digitally.  On top of that, it has no save state system or even a way to save your progress since the save data is incompatible with the Switch for some reason.  Needless to say, everyone else follows suit with this method of charging people for old games.

I wish cretaceous dinosaurs were featured in a future game.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted, they're invincible beasts that hinder critical story progress and require hacks to defeat. You cannot recruit any of them and one chapter forces you to defeat them to win.

I wish there was a Genocide Route in Fire Emblem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You have to treat every map as if the objective is "rout the enemy", even the ones that have dozens of turns of reinforcements, you are forced to visit every village in order to slaughter all the residents, you have to kill every single member of your army, and finally somehow have both your lord and the final boss simultaneously kill themselves in order for the ending to play without it being registered as a game over. Have fun!

 

I wish that a critical attack animation for gauntlets is for the unit to suplex their opponent.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The animation is so crappily done that most people skip it.

I wish Felix's mom would have appeared, as well as both Sylvain's parents and Ingrid's parents.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Granted.  The Dead Dad Club is about to get A LOT bigger.

I wish Marth would just feed Grima a giant Snickers bar to calm him down instead of resorting to killing him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Marth rises from the grave (as a Terror instead of a Risen) and does just that after Grima has already destroyed the world.

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem Tower Defense game.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's a mobile app that's even more pay to win than Heroes.

I wish Dr. Phil would come to Fodlan and have Felix and Rodrigue on his show.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...