Jump to content

Chaos reigns when I take the reins! - Let's play Tear Ring saga, Ironman mode, while being terrible at Fire Emblem!


Saint Rubenio

Recommended Posts

5 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Might be a nice project to work on for someone looking to sharpen their singing and sound-mixing skills. Only real snag is the potential copyright. Then again, considering how niche Tear Ring Saga is...

Surprisingly an easy snare to escape, given fair use law allows parody... which is ultimately what I feel everything I've done firmly falls into. https://fairuse.stanford.edu/overview/fair-use/what-is-fair-use/
 

5 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

DANG! That is somehow hilarious, intriguing, and frightening all in one package.

I am now both interested and scared of researching sleepwalking.


There's a surprising amount of things people have done in their sleep. Sleep-eating, sleep-working, sleep-murder, sleep-sex (which on at least one occasion was used as a defense in a rape case). My own issue has lead to some frustration not because I've put on weight (that'd hardly be an issue given my metabolism is sufficient that I can live off junk food for a week with no weight gain) but rather because in a sleeping state I have rather little regard for whose food I'm taking, expiry dates, etc.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 905
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Bit of info about "Stealth Hunter" -- the Japanese name is ハイドハンター Haido Hantaa, which seems to be "Hide Hunter." (For what it's worth, there's also ハイドナイト Haido Naito "Hide Knight" unused in the game.) No clue if the first word was supposed to be "hide" as in "hidden" or as in "animal hide," so I went with the first and made it clearer as Stealth Hunter. Earlier ideas included Captain, though now that people mention it, Admiral would've been good, too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Part 57 - Lentzenmayhem.

Nintendo, you bastards, give me a date for Luigi's Mansion 3! The game looks too good!

Well, at the very least, they finally gave me designs for 3H that I actually like. Edgy!Dimitri's amazing, and although I initially disliked the older Edelgard, the design grew on me. Claude is still rather uninspired, in my opinion, but oh well, what can you do. It's better than what we had before. Only thing is, now I'm even more worried about Hanneman. Dude's old, the timeskip's yet another factor that decreases his chances of being playable. I know five years isn't that much, but still. There's one character I want to use, damnit, my favourites always die in everything. Forgive me for being worried.

Also I took a quick glance at the Treehouse 3H direct... and I know I'm probably alone here, but billions of billious blue blistering barnacles balderdash, Byleth's sleeves following his arms' movements is SO distracting! They should just trail behind him, not follow his god damned arms like there's some sort of weird phantom living in his coat! How can they do this!? And the worst part is, it's inconsistent! The sleeves don't always follow his arms - instead, half the time they just clip through his arms and the scenery! How could they possibly fuck this up so badly!?! THIS ISN'T FE! THAT'S IT, I AIN'T BUYING THIS GAME UNTIL THEY FIX BYLETH'S COAT!!

Oh, and the entire game's hideous, but THAT DOESN'T COMPARE TO BYLETH'S COAT BEING POORLY ANIMATED! #FIXBYLETH

...seriously though, the game seems better than I initially thought. Not quite hyped (yet, at least), but the whole academy part strikes me as a worse version of Berwick's town, and that's never a bad thing, considering Berwick is peak human achievement and nothing can beat it. Also, the fact that the school's basically just the prologue is good, very good. Some may think it's a shame they spoiled the big twist, but honestly, a lot of people like myself probably wouldn't even have bothered had they not revealed that it's, in fact, not Highschool of the Emblem DxD.

I still have one big complaint, though: boy is it ugly. It's horrendous, damnit! Graphics don't make or break a game by themselves, but this game's just awful, I'm sorry. Everything clips, the textures are horrendously low-quality (and that's just inexcusable for a console that also houses the likes of Smash Bros Ultimate and Super Mario Odyssey), the generic troops assigned to each unit keep disappearing and reappearing as the camera moves - heck, they don't even seem to do anything substantial! The shadows are funky! Map movements are as stiff as those from PoR, a 14-year-old game! The animations... kinda are, too! Is it just me? The girls at the direct seemed to love the game's looks! Am I alone here? Were they just paid to say those thin-- I mean, of course, but... what does everyone else think?

Repp:

Spoiler
On 6/9/2019 at 7:55 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

I have actually done this already.
Awesome. Good minion-- reader!

When you realize the real strategy in Kaga's games was setting that little feat up.
Kaga's a monster. But what a monster!

Yeah, I'm one of those people who almost never get the Jerme route because of the fact the healer experience counts towards Kenneth... and I'm honestly not the biggest fan of Raven... or Guy, or FE7 Bartre.
Yeah, and then there's the fact that Kenneth's chapter is better and so is its loot. Jerme's... a really unfortunate man.


I didn't intend for it to make you feel bad, given a part of the song is dedicated to travelling to Valhalla. Where those who fall in combat feast by night and practice battle by day, their wounds healing. Kind of a way of feeling slightly better about the whole thing when a unit dies.

Can't imagine him enjoying it too much, knowing he's left Mel behind to suffer.

I just ruined the whole concept, didn't I...

Yeah. Pretty good guess. Though Garo and Sasha are pretty strong contenders. Hell so are Runan and Maruj (though I still miss the plane animations). Anyway, I figure The Roger needed to live on in at least some way, and my new username was the best one I could think of.

Good way to honor him. Although, the Dakruon still exists, you know. He's one of the potential candidates for that one use.

Yeah. I kind of started that. To be fair, they both had dealings with Lentzenheimmer, and contributed about as much to your quest as each other (I mean, the shopkeep still sold you stuff, and Zieg gave Lentzie the verbal smackdown he needed)

Heck, throw Norton into the mix. He cut off Lentzie's eye, and he's helped so much, he's probably glitched out and looped right back to Zieg and Vega's contribution level. That totally counts, right?

A word in the english language that begins with "F" and ends with "UCK"?

  Reveal hidden contents

Firetruck

Bwahahahah... brilliant! Let me try. Here's a word in the english language that begins with C and ends with NT.

Spoiler

Count

Another one! An english word that begins with S and ends with a T.

Spoiler

Street

This is fun! Now for one that begins with D and ends with ICK

Spoiler
Kv5wulqf o

Meanwhile, if I were in the game, no one would know who I was because I'm so sporadic on my posting. Seriously, I think I've been nominated in the Interview thread twice, and each time got one vote. (If memory serves it was Pengaius and Hawkwing, not necessarily in that order).

Hey, the one time I had that, I was picked by the dice. That wasn't the greatest of rounds.

Wouldn't be the weirdest thing I've heard. I sleep-eat. Literally get up, go to the kitchen, and chow down on chocolate and so forth. Because why the hell not waste something I eat for the flavour on myself while I'm not even aware I'm doing it. Apeboy on the other hand, once tried to detach the hinges to his bedroom door in his sleep when he was a kid. Thought he was awake, and asked what he was doing. Turned out he wasn't awake.

Jesus Christ tie him to his bed before the ruins your house.

"I killed all those men, and for what?
A piece of land?
Where had my honour gone?
Can one call themself a man without honour?"

A reference, to be sure.

Hell, Apeboy just bought a bow that can put an arrow through a sheet of solid steel... though it's kind of lead to a "what the hell do we use as a target when it goes through everything conventional" moment. So needless to say it's not seeing much use.
...why in the world-- you know what, I won't ask.

How the hell is a unit who can die if you get unlucky this damn important to the plot?

Kaga was letting all his hatred for humanity flow out of his system before making his zen masterpiece, Berwick.

This sold way better than Berwick, which in turn outsold both Tellius FEs. Just a fun fact.


Anyway, I guess I'll throw out another song (Mind I've wrote both the ones I had ideas for at this point). I think I'll go with "I am the Law" (Parodying I am the Law, by Anthrax... but without a real name change) despite the lack of Law lately.. and the liberties taken to make it work.

  Reveal hidden contents

Fifteen years in the monastery
He was the best Bishop this side of Lee
A man so holy as to call forth Maerchen's good side
And that is something extremely easy to hide.
They call him Law, he works as a priest
So mess with Law, and you wind up deceased
An end to Gerxel is what he's striving for
This Bishop, he is the Law
With tome and staves he rules the streets
And every cultist he meets will taste defeat
Not even Death can overcome his might
Because he was born to shed his holy light.
When Gerxel started the current war
Pirates attacked and injured Law,
Katri escaped, but it seemed like Law's death,
Yet despite the attack this man still draws breath,
Respect this man - he earned it with his blood
Fear his tome – your sentence is in store... I AM THE LAW!
And you won't enslaves girls no more - I AM THE LAW
Turn corrupt barons into coleslaw - I AM THE LAW
Exposition is what I'm for - I AM THE LAW
Because in Blaad... I AM THE LAW
Reunited with Katri, He travels with Holmes,
And gives him advice, wherever he roams,
Having freed Granada, from the clutch of Gerxel's Claw,
This is the status, of Holmes and Law,
And while fallen heroes receive their respects,
To revive them with the Darkruon is what is next,
So he travels on this dire mission,
As he gives Holmes Exposition.
Gerxel - The evil cult
The deaths we've suffered is their fault.
LAW - It's what the bishop stands for
Gerxel is his enemy and he's going to war
Gerxel - The evil cult
The deaths we've suffered is their fault.
LAW - It's what the bishop stands for
Gerxel is his enemy and he's going to war

Hoo, boy... there are some things in there that I'll come back to in the future. Sit tight.

In the meantime, though!

Quote

Exposition is what I'm for - I AM THE LAW

Goddamnit, man, that was a painful update. My wrists still ache!

 

On 6/9/2019 at 7:57 PM, BrightBow said:

Dagdar is of course the kind of character that people tend to underestimate. But I don't think I've ever seen anyone claim he is the best unit altogether, even ignoring staff users.

I have. It seems like the general consensus at Reddit, anyway. I ate the tier lists up back when I couldn't live with myself because of all the hype I had. Everyone was like "OMIGOSH DAGDAH so GOOD he can GO to ENDGAME with BASES".

Seems like this led to a pretty funny situation where, instead of underestimating him like most, I overestimated him! Seriously was expecting more than the dude who got doubled by mages and got crit to death by every single ballista unless I slapped a scroll on his ass. Doubtlessly, he was a great asset in the earlygame, but he fell off. Hard.

I've got to say, between Xavier and Hicks, I really do not miss him. They both are way better than him; Xavier's grown well (even got a move point defending Leonster!) and his skillset's just too amazing, and Hicks is nearing every one of his caps (he never even got any scrolls, it was all his own growth).

It was a shame to lose the brave axe with Dagdar, but Xavier's master axe does the same job well.


In any case, it's strange how it took until Tear Ring Saga for charge to become a Command skill. At least it could have been limited to player phase.
I'm so happy that by the time of Berwick probability based skills were mostly phased out. You can't strategize around some 20% probability or whatever. And if enemies have those skills you have to treat it as a 100% certainty that they will trigger.

Yes, although there are some probability-based skills in Berwick, they're the minority, which is very good. Instead, Berwick's skills reward proper strategizing, with trade-offs such as cooldowns, inability to use after moving, making the units more vulnerable...

 

On 6/10/2019 at 12:40 AM, eclipse said:

I don't think Esther is going to lose any sleep if Arkis bites the dust. 😛

I would doubt it, yes.

 

On 6/10/2019 at 1:33 AM, Pengaius said:

Remind me, between Arkis and Roger, who is currently a corpse. 

It'll be you, if you don't shut up!

Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! I know!

You're... too excited about his very likely demise.

I mean she has been sleeping on the bench since the last time she had any story relevance. 😎

Sorry? I've been using her, you know! You must be really high to forget that. Either that or you're delusional. But nah, I think you're just high. On butter.

 

On 6/10/2019 at 1:35 AM, eclipse said:

Better than being Prototype Gaggles. 😛

Don't listen to him, he's high.

 

On 6/10/2019 at 3:40 AM, Hawkwing said:

So... The Chancellor of the place that I think murderprincess was a part of... no she was running from there... actually she could be from there... *Checks earlier updates* Ah, the Chancellor of Welt! Or was it two 'L's?

Hahahahahahahah, dude. How could you forget somebody so big?

Also, I miss Marlon.

Yeah, so do I. Him and Eugen had a really fun dynamic. If it makes you feel better, though, we'll see him again.

Also Also, you said this about our protagonists earlier:

Ah, back when we didn't have to deal with Holmes bullcrap.

Hahahahah, I remember that. To be fair, I always did say I liked Runan better.

Anyway, it appears that the Chancellor joined a cult in his earlier years, but then decided it was full of crap, made a bunch of cannons using a steel press, and became the corrupted leader of Act 1 town.

Ooohhhhh the steelpress lore! Now those were some fine headcanons we had going on there.

Or he escaped his prison and decided to join a cult, only to be thwarted by another brown haired prince.

Poetic justice at its finest. But nah, couldn't be. That'd imply he lost weight, which just isn't possible.

Lucky for you, he already did:

Cool. Come to me, views!

In other words, it all leads/led to Berwick.

I believe it.

Life itself leads to Berwick. The chosen ones by God are led to it throughout their lives. We are the master race. We are the master race... praise Kaga...

If you haven't noticed already, it also does it for the pictures I post some of the time.

You can tell what I copy-pasted from the internet and screenshotted for myself by doing so.

That's going to be awkward a few years down the line, if the servers for those sites die.

Then again if Imgur decides to wipe my account, half my LPs are going to be ruined. Oh, well. Somebody make snapshots of all my LPs for the wayback machine!

Poor Holmes? Hilariously enough, the next Hunger games thing I did was nothing but foxes. Guess who won.

...Jeremie Belpois, from Code Lyoko! I'm sure of it. The guy's an absolute unit, he could fight off all those foxes.

I don't remember, but he either died in a group attack or he died of dehydration.

Hahahah... fallen prey to the same fate Eugen threatened Narcus with. I can only imagine Eugen going "Well, as you were. I've got to go cave that blond drunkard's head in for letting you die, Milord! I'll come back and resurrect you later.".

Then he killed Holmes, blamed Fox, revived Runan with his superpowers, and flew away from the battlefield. That's canon now.

Also, I can relevantly post this now:

uzDe7c071tGuAygf2PzDyJknbRqTJ2v3HllFkuy0yFCkUeqvW5vrwyaGUs4-w68_lP2h5-PZkgHjYWYsUAAb4REN9lDQQxKs7SwyDddAv8UYcJL8Lz0LT4d5GrZRxw6wNe0ZH9dG

...aw, they died together! Maybe they lost their glasses, and that's how...

Let's take more than an eye...

Oh, I did a number on him. You'll see...

Uh... he could provide the power-ups?

I mean, he can barrier.

It is a pretty cool name, so I can't blame them there.

Agreed. I mean, it makes even this guy cool.

v4g81TU.png

Now that's an accomplishment.

I think that's Fates.

Could be, I don't know.

Who knows? I mean, the mechanic has a few drawbacks (you have one less unit on the field, it can potentially throw experience gains out of whack, weapons can be easily wasted if the other unit attacks when they didn't need to, and similar issues), bu it's telling that Fates and presumably Three Houses (are) nerfed/nerfing it.

One less unit means nothing if it means there's another one with double the power. Experience gains? This ain't 2008, Jagen is good and experience waste is no issue. Waste of weapons, I can sort of see, but it's waaaay too minor for the wondrous benefits.

Compare that to the closest thing to rescuing that there is in Berwick (I know, I know, sorry), the Guard skill, which Ward and Marcel have. It works like this: if the guarded character is attacked, the enemy enters combat with the guardian instead. However, the guardian suffers some heavy stat losses, and neither of the units can do anything but wait without stopping the skill's effects.

This was unbelievably useful in the last chapter I played, where I had Perceval, flimsy mage, destroy a dangerous ballista in the middle of a horde of enemies, and then had Marcel guard him from everything else. Marcel killed nobody and came closer to death that I'd liked, but that's better than what would've happened if he had his powers doubled - read, chapter over.

A few females show their cleavage, and there are a number of innuendos (Such as Clive and Mathilda's reunion conversation, and Jesse has the weirdly in-character "my body is your plaything, Mila" as his promotion quote). Enough to earn the rating, but it's handled tastefully for the most part.

I mean, there is such a thing as "human body" that exists and there's nothing you can do about that.

Now, my question is: what was Fates's rating?

That... would be different, to say the least.

I know there are some theories/leaks that paint her in a more interesting light, so we'll just have to wait and see. Although I'm not holding my breath, either.

Considering a good bunch of leaks were confirmed in the E3, perhaps this won't be a Grinch situation.

Awesome intro. I have a few nitpicks,

Let me guess, that one random shot of the moon that went on for like 5 seconds. For no good reason.

Yeah, it's got some clunky parts, but fuck me the part with Ward kneeling before the graves is so awesome, I made it my profile's cover pic!

Although, I've got to say, that part scares me. The intro's filled with events that happen in the game (only presented in a way so that you only know what's going on after playing the game), and I'm really afraid that there'll be some major deaths down the line, judging by that part.

but honestly this makes me sad that the 90's never had a movie that featured nothing but spritework. Heck, it would be awesome to see an animation company today make pixels look awesome for a larger audience.

Yeah, the problem is that, today, it seems most associate "spritework" with the myriads of nostalgia-pandering, NES-styled indie games that are completely hideous. People tend to forget that, between the NES and the Switch, there was such a thing as the SNES, which was capable of being (gasp!) beautiful.

YAY! New things to listen to while writing the reply!

Hahahah, good on you! Although, to be fair, that's an orchestrated version of the OST. Still, there isn't that much of a difference between the orchestrated versions and the ingame versions. Here, compare both versions of this one. Heck, I'd say I like the ingame version better, myself!

I was kinda aiming at the generic poses and the repetitive pegasus knight animations, but holy crap, you're right! They remind me of the PC versions physics engine of the Force Awakens (it's a terrible port, but at least it's playable, and the sequel is more stable), where the dangling cloth on Starkiller would occasionally become frozen.

Yeah, I really hope they fix that issue, because it's horrible.

Didn't wow me necessarily,

I mean, if I wanted to wow you, I'd send you something other than the first talking scene.

Ahem.

but I do appreciate the attention to detail and the willingness to make sprites for such a scene.

It's not just this one, either. There are no conversation backgrounds in this game: every single scene takes place in maps of some kind, and very few of them resort to the "dark screen behind the textboxes" solution.

I see that Ward is Berwicks Eugen, Faye is finally allowed to be a mercenary, Clifford fell on hard times, and why is Marcel wearing a dress?

Not quite, actually. Ward is kinda Eugen, but he trades off most of the sass for a playable status (in fact, he's kinda the second Lord! No such thing as units retreating when dying for the dialogue here, no sir. Ward game-overs you just like Reese). Faye is a myrmidon, and Marcel's not wearing a dress, c'mon.

You did nail Clifford, though, that's his character: he used to be this amazing knight, but he fell on hard times and now he's a drunken loser who does mercenary work to pay off his tabs.

Jokes aside, the artwork is very good. Who was the artist?

Kazuaki Morita. Not sure if it's the same guy that comes up when you google the name, though, considering that guy is still involved with Nintendo and doesn't seem to be an artist at all. You can find the artist's Pixiv in Aethin's blog.

Not at all. Remind me to ask my tech wiz friend to get the game on my laptop next time m family has a game night.

Sure, go ahead. The translation goes up to the first 31 maps, so there'll be more than enough content for one night. If your family's into this kind of game, I'm sure you'll enjoy yourselves. When you first see a bag, scream "A BAG! WE'RE RICH!". Nobody will get the reference, but somewhere in the world, there will be a very happy man.

Besides, do I need to bring up Blustone? Even if I haven't really played that game in a while...

Ahah, yes.

Meant to say "things of the sort", so... I suppose you won from a certain point of view...

I am winner! Wooohoooooo!

Unless I was in a situation where I could not change clothing, yeah I'd like to wear something different eventually.

That's the idea.

I suppose the world of TRS simultaneously invented helicopters and airplanes and then lost the technology. I blame Tom for blowing them all up.

Hahahahah, I can see that. Maybe he blew them up in frustration after Codha put him in the box.

It was more the "waifu" comment than anything else.

That was an attempt to annoy you, to be fair. I succeeded! Hahah!

It's a platonic love, the kind that comes about when a unit disembowels the enemy forces while not taking any scratches themselves, and for being a solid character in their own right outside of gameplay, so you get the best of both worlds.

I know what you mean. I love Sasha, but it's not illegal because I only love the way she'd make Josef Mengele blush upon taking a look at her list of war crimes. It's Kate that I love the other way. And Sierra has both! Ahem, I uh... distractions?

Again, I do understand we're you're coming from. 

Distractions.

Also, is this the first time you've called me "Hawky"?

Not sure. Could be, Hawky.

It's probably some convoluted sidequest that requires massacring a city of teddy bears, finding three ancient swords that have the power to slay an immortal being that turns out to just be another dragon, kidnapping some random kid so they don't answer the question of the century that gives Arkis a level, and placing16 chickens onto a dog onto a trampoline.

Bwahahahahahahahah okay that was awesome.

It's like an inverted version of that one meme.

Right?

This is honestly a reason why I hope that IS contiunes the trend they had with Awakening and Echoes. In the former, the lord can recruit everyone in the game (with one very specific exception, and even then the game makes it obvious who you have to recruit them with), so even if a characters mother was defeated, you still have the ability to grab a child unit. In the latter, you recruit characters outside of battle, so as long as they survive the fight, you can add them to your army afterwards. It helps remove bullcrap situations like this.

Bah, you casuals have it easy. Have you any idea what I had to go through to recruit Xavier?

Pain, without end.

I did meant to say "swims". To bad he's not named after another kind of fish , or else I could have done this joke:

Episode 1305: The Anakin's Cookbook

Hwahahahah, Luke destroyed Yoda. And then Yoda died and this is the last conversation he ever had with anyone.

I can only imagine Obi-Wan laughed very hard.

Eh, it's mostly what I wrote for the interview things so I didn't loose anything when the site inevitable logged me out, as well as writing down my thoughts and observations after ironmanning Awakening for the first time. And some ideas for forum games, before I put those in a different topic. Nowadays, I just use it to post screenshotted pictures/memes I made without taking up attachment space.

I see.

...Read my statement earlier about how humor doesn't work in this kind of situation.

Yes, indeed, I just wanted to say that.

No, just giving you my life motto.

Your life motto is a meme? Eh, I won't judge.

Good point.

Ah. It's Et Tu in English. Although I suppose I should have noticed that something seemed familiar.

Pretty sure they're both valid variants. I mean, this is something that happened millennia ago. Records weren't exactly precise back then. It's only natural multiple versions of the same quote would surface. Hell, for all we know he just died saying "GUUUUURRRRRGHHHHH" and that's it.

Thank you for introducing me to the word "fasteriskck". I shall use it in the future.

Go right ahead. No need to give me credit or anything.

Eugen needs to test out Holmes plot armor again. It'd be nice to know the limits of it.

It's not big enough to protect him from Eugen, that's for sure.

Add Libra from last year to that list. And Luthier from my last Echoes playthrough, even though Mila's turnwheel prevented it

Gah... why, FE? Why must you be so cruel to everybody?

I never noticed that Holmes had a frowning portrait

We've only seen it a couple times.

Like Runan's smile, it's only a few pixels off from his default portrait.

Yes.

Or The Rogers death and Mel leaving made him think twice about if it was worth it.

I mean, he didn't care for Krishna's death, but maybe meeting Richard was enough to make the venture not worth it to him.

I can see that. He'd probably trade off his entire party in exchange for a shot at Richard.

So... Holmes is an open-world protagonist, but the issue is that the player doesn't have control over him?

Sounds about right.

You're right, we're getting to know how the player character feels in the hands of a completionist. Just screaming "WHY DO YOU MAKE ME DO ANY OF THE THINGS YOU MAKE ME DOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?!?!?! WHAT IS THE PURPOSE!?"

And we transition to the outdoors!

Woo!

That's Holmes dad?!

He... looks like a sailor.

What's the family resemblance, besides boats?

None, but TRS never really tries to make relatives resemble each other. Remember Lina? Yeah...

So young green haired girl is an NPC.

Is her portrait unique, or is it used somewhere else?

Unique, I'm pretty sure.

Considering his earlier mood...

Image result for i have a bad feeling about this

A reasonable feeling.

...

While it doesn't excuse any of Holmes actions, this one line does a hell lot to explain them.

There is a lot of mutual hatred here, isn't there?

Yes... the moment you see this scene, you understand everything.

Kind of

Personally, this feels less like trolling, and more like being an asshole.

Hey I didn't say he was trolling, I said he was having fun. Being an asshole...

I wouldn't be surprised if it was made for this one moment.

Hah, fuckin' Kaga!

In other words, his previous sprite, but with slightly more armor and a sword.

Stealth hunter is a cool name, but it sounds more fitting for an airplane game. Wonder if this is a case of foreshadowing or something. Or Kaga just decided it sounded cool.

In the final chapter it turns into War Thunder out of nowhere. Now that'd be awesome.

Our first introduction to his new armor, and he's frowning.

As a nice comparison and contrast, Runan should smile when he get's promoted.

Maybe it'll happen, who knows.

Guess he has to have something going for him, at the very least.

Yes. Something not good for him, but hey!

Holmes and his dad's relationship: The abridged version.

Throw in "parents can eat shit" and it'll be complete.

...And once again, the game does an excellent job at showing that Admiral Vals is a flawed character in a short amount of time.

Eeeyup.

...This probably explains the lack of family resemblance, doesn't it?

Not really, he doesn't look much like his mother, either. You'll see when we meet her.

Also, depending on when Holmes figured this fact out, this may or may not answer the question I had about him reaction to recruiting Plum the way he did...

Ergh... please elaborate, because I don't really get it.

Sheesh. This chapter is like punching bag for Holmes, except it's not as hilarious as when Eugen decked him in the face.

To be fair, nothing can be as hilarious as when Eugen decked him in the face.

No wonder they hate each other. They remind each other of the their worst attributes.

That's quite the realistic dynamic, right there.

Nice comeback, Shigen.

And I suppose this is a reference to how every Fire Emblem game has to have one scene where the protagonist is cheered on by a crowd?

Probably.

04edcfbn oMay as well have a bird shit on my head while it happens. Like I need more people to laugh at me for how this day's been going.

Don't be so negative, you dumbass! You promoted! Enemy phase combat's great!

This makes me curious about how many points Holmes put into charisma.

Exactly 1. And he lost it when Eugen punched the bees out of him.

I know that you found this sequence to be humorous, but honestly there was too much vitriol between Holmes and his father for me to find it funny. While again, this doesn't excuse his idiotic and spiteful actions in the past, I now have a better idea of where they came from.

Yes, if you think about it carefully, it's pretty fucked up how much they despise each other. It's very obviously played for laughs, but...

Suffice to say, I like to believe Shigen when he says that Vals was tearing up seeing Holmes all grown up. Implies some degree of redeemability for both him and his relationship with Holmes.

Now this will be as cool as chapter 26B!

...Wait a second...

Hahahah!

On the lighter side of things, we get to see Lentzie get beat up in more ways than one!

Oh, I'm quite sure you'll be satisfied, this time.

I suppose Lentz knows that a lot of people want him dead, so he hired a bodyguard that really was only in it for the money to occupy him in the castle, where people would be most likely to assassinate him. As for why he didn't bring him outdoors... maybe Lentz was just that reliant on the reinforcements that never came that he never planned a back-up strategy?

Eh, makes sense enough, I suppose.

Poetic justice is a lot more common in real life than most people think.

Right.

"When the swords return to their scabbards" is an awesome line for these kind of situations.

Heheh, thanks. I'm pretty proud of it, myself.

Arkis saying anything that sends him to hell.

To be completely honest, knowing his track record, I think he's better off following Lentzie's order. He might screw up and tick off the wrong person. Which, in his case, is everybody in my army, excluding the clerics, but including the unplayable Malledus. REALLY including the unplayable Malledus. He'd be Arkis's worst nightmare.

...Oh wait, it's so Runan's army kills one of their own. Except the possibilities of that happening...

I don't see how that's supposed to help Lentzie get away. Could you help me understand?

...Might be more plausible if there was another character holding an axe next to Lina.

Except then there would need to be a line of solders telling the executioner that Arkis said something.

Except this is the series where character can hear each other yards away from each other.

...What point was I trying to make, again?

That Lentzenheimer is terrible.

Yeah, simply telling someone to stay silent is doubtfull to work. A gag would make more sense. Or ripping the jaw off and/or the tongue out, but that might be too permanent and result in death via blood loss.

Yeah, I don't think they wanted to go that far with poor Arkis. Still, a gag would've been perfect.

I honestly have to agree with this. It would be similar to the hostage situation in The Dark Knight, just with less people involved and without Batman. The only real snag I could see with the gag would be the possibility that Arkis could suffocate while wearing one under a helmet. It doesn't happen in fiction, but it could happen in real life, if Wikipedia is anything to go by, and knowing Kaga, he'd jump on the possibility to have Arkis pass out if the player takes too long or he does too much in a short amount of time.

Pffft. It'd be impossible to get him, then! You'll understand when I tell you how he's re-recruited.

And they have the scars to show for it. I can say that I was not expecting that.

'Cept for Frost, but I guess that's the upside of being a healer.

Ah, it's nothing too bad. Just scratches.

Ever the voice of reason.

Runan was and is shaping up to be a strong leader by the time this game is over.

Oh, just you wait...

Characters talking about pain after coming back from the dead is really something that should appear more often in fiction.

Then again, I could see it come off as sacrilegious to some people, so I suppose there's a reason why it's rare.

I did try to make Arran hesitant to bring it up. He probably would rather not talk about it.

A request like this makes me wonder if there will be some gameplay-story integration in the next update...

Ah, might be.

Love how Xyon turned Holmes own words against him. People have a knack with doing that against Holmes, don't they?

Can you blame them? It's so easy!

Guess if he's on his deathbed, Holmes knows how to be respectful.

Surprisingly enough.

Unless it's his dad, but as this update has proven, there's a reason for that.

Oh, goodness gracious...

At this point, there should be a counter about fictional songs on this lets play.

Or by then end, the number of forum jokes there are.

Come to think about it, we've amassed quite the compilation of thread jokes along the way, haven't we?

- Horseman.
- The Brilliant Dumbass.
- Merlinus hate.
- The Roger The Paladin
-
Juliattisnacordst
-

I'll let you guys complete the list.

 

On 6/10/2019 at 4:34 AM, John Cena said:

Long time lurker, first time poster.

Oh, hey! Welcome!

Poor The Roger The Paladin. 😢

...gaaahhh... why does every LP have to have one of THESE deaths...

When I played Tear Ring Saga a a few months ago I used this Let's Play as a form of a companion tool. Not necessarily as a guide, but usually after I finished a chapter.

Hah! That's cool. I'm glad to hear you got some enjoyment out of this... admittedly less trainwrecky than my other trainwrecks trainwreck.

Its also highly entertaining. Reading your Let's Play this also got me to try out Leonie in my playthrough and she wound up becoming one of my best units. I don't think she's good for LTC, but there's a lot of ways to get her kills.

Yeah, not denying that, but you really just need to slow down at Barbarossa's and afterwards she's set for life.

I'm still pretty new to Fire Emblem, but right now Tear Ring and Berwick (the 6 chapters I've played) are my favorite Fire Emblem-style games right now. Can't really explain why but I feel like units have niches and that with some of the higher growth rate games a lot of units just fall behind really quick and that the cores of the team feel smaller? Maybe its the map design? Berwick's Command Skills? 😮

Ahahah, whoa, starting with TRS and BS of all games? That's an interesting place to start. Also a shame, because after Berwick's all said and done, you probably will be unable to enjoy any other FEs. I mean, I can, but that's just nostalgic value. Berwick's the world's masterpiece. It should be taught in schools, preached in churches, worshipped in cults. Like the Bible, except better, because Berwick has Ward.

Just a little heads-up, though: when you get to the end of the translated portion of the game (chapter 9), you're going to suffer pain without end. Speaking from experience. Prepare some painkillers, is my advice. I recommend Fire Emblem: Thracia 776. Now that's a painkiller I can get behind.

I really appreciate you going the extra mile to show off 26A + 26B. Your story additions are also dope. Was satisfying seeing the Slaver get his comeuppance. Its very crazy to see how much of the game changes when certain units become unrecruitable.

Heh, thanks, appreciate the kind words.

Just want to wish you luck in the upcoming chapter. AMADOU~!

...ahh, I thought I'd seen you somewhere! You posted at the Berwick thread!

  Reveal hidden contents

I felt this chapter was the hardest one for me to complete. In an Iron Man run I'm pretty sure I'd lose multiple units. Arkis is boned.

Dammit, you! Why is everybody's first instinct to imply that I'm going to do bad?! I have a plan! For real, this time!

 

On 6/10/2019 at 9:46 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Not sure what the joke was, but I used to use the word as a stand-in for actual swearing in English assignments. There wasn't anything anyone could do to stop me because I'd only maybe use it once an assignment, it wasn't actually swearing, and it could be argued off as a personality quirk of the character I attributed it to.

Now that's an awesome strategy.
Yeah, I was a bit similar. I started attending classes again, and that drastically lowered the amount of posts I made for a while.

School's a bitch. Unless you're me. I'm lazy, so I get to make LPs in the middle of the school year.
That's only going into personal experience. Check this one out.

https://www.lookandlearn.com/blog/15523/chief-inspector-ledru-the-policeman-who-caught-himself/

Oh, whoa. That's amazing. Amazingly morbid, too. Poor man. I can't imagine how horrible it must be to find out you murdered somebody you didn't even know in cold blood while you were sleeping. Quite brave of him to reveal the truth and turn himself in for the sake of those around him. Heroic, even.

Or we could just compile the lot and make that Album. I have no idea who can sing it, given I'd utterly fail to produce quality. Also, we need to throw in the Thomas the Tank engine theme minus some notes to make it the "Tom the tank" theme.

That last one would be quite easy. Make it happen, somebody. I beseech you!

 

7 hours ago, Aethin said:

Bit of info about "Stealth Hunter" -- the Japanese name is ハイドハンター Haido Hantaa, which seems to be "Hide Hunter." (For what it's worth, there's also ハイドナイト Haido Naito "Hide Knight" unused in the game.) No clue if the first word was supposed to be "hide" as in "hidden" or as in "animal hide," so I went with the first and made it clearer as Stealth Hunter. Earlier ideas included Captain, though now that people mention it, Admiral would've been good, too.

Interesting. I can't imagine Holmes going out to fetch animal skin to sell to the highest bidder, so I think you made the right call. Still, taking a small creative liberty and just going with Admiral would've been better, in my humble opinion. Holmes is the complete opposite of the word "stealth".

Upp:

Spoiler
Oelddqm9 o982iscpq o7g1hddu7 o

Inv. management.

A7rwlbtp o

Today's map. Lentzie has a bunch of Shadow Knights, Myrmidons and one Dark Mage to keep us at bay. He also has an extremely ominous roofed room in the middle of the map. Three guesses as to what's inside. First two don't count.

So at first glance, this looks like an awful map. Maybe even worse than 26A, because instead of straight hallways, this is just one corridor that takes the army aaaaaaaaaaaall around the ominous room in the middle. By the looks of it, it's your classic "move units one tile at a time, kill enemies, repeat until throne".

However, unlike, say, Castle Ostia in FE6, this map is not only extremely fast-paced, it also takes careful planning and strategizing. Why? Well, first, let me show you our enemies. The Shadow Knights are sporting their usual devil lances. The Myrmidons, however...

Moldjzky o

Yeah. As combat units, they're terrible, but if you get hit, you'll lose an item, and you'll have to use your mugger (assuming you have one, which I didn't in my first run) to get it back.

However, keep in mind that muggers decrease the avoid of everyone around them. This is really, really bad, considering half the map is covered by two arbalest assholes, an Archer with a chu-ko-nu for those tighter parts of the corridor, and a High Mage with an AoE spell, tornado. Add to all that the Dark Mage with swarm midway through, and the resulting combination isn't pretty.

3qplgytt o

And as if that wasn't enough, there's the problem with Arkis. You know how you tell Arkis is Arkis? Different portrait, he speaks to himself in the first enemy phase, he doesn't try attacking? No, no and nope. Here's how you tell that this random Shadow Lancer is Arkis and not a random Shadow Lancer:

Vnkw9zij oRqkvlyka o

He's ever-so-slightly worse than his peers. If you leveled him up enough prior to this, he'll also still have his skills, which is the easiest way to tell him apart, but if you didn't (which is the right call), it helps that the rest of the Lancers all have the same stats.

"But wait, does this mean he'll actually follow Lentzie's orders?", I hear you say. Why, yes. He's going to put his best method acting skills to the test and become a legit Shadow Lancer. In fact, he's so into the role, it's likely to get him killed if you aren't careful. Here's where all the Myrmidons with thief daggers come into play: pry one off of a Myrmidon's cold, dead hands, and you can steal Arkis's gear, ensuring he doesn't kamikaze on Kreiss's lance or anything like that. Once he's unarmed, you can safely ignore him until you can free Lina and have her double back to talk to him.

But here's the thing: Notice how everything is set up to waste time in this map? The room in the middle that encourages advancing slowly, one unit at a time, to avoid getting shot too much; the Myrmidons whose weapons are just too good to pass; a Mage with swarm to inconvenience units trying to dash into the first landing; Arkis being a jackass... it's all there to encourage you to take 100 turns.

But you can't take 100 turns. Not in this map.

Vxilnqzg o

It's all this fucker's fault. This bastard is the single reason this map requires a lot more strategy and preparation than the rest of the game. This piece of shit forces you to be quick. You know what he does? He makes a beeline for the upper chest. And he doesn't escape towards the southern gate (where we start), or to the western part of the castle, ooohhh no, he merges through the castle walls and flees NORTH from the courtyard where the chest is. He needs 6-7 turns to make it to the chest, and once there, a single turn to get out of the map.

But it doesn't take that long for all hell to break loose: as soon as turn 3, Arkis will reach the hallway beyond the Dark Mage. Once he gets there, you have two choices: either murder him to get through fast, or waste a crapton of time getting him to move without hurting him.

So, yeah. In conclusion, you need to hurry. A lot. And no, you can't sacrifice the loot. You just can't. That loot is worth 10 Arkises put together, plus all the loot from 26A. It's that good.

Wdstmog8 o

But not to worry. I've got a solid plan.

Vapuczbk oNxjirtz0 o1p4hatf3 o

The plan is to have Lionel and Leonie haul ass. This is why I like Leonie: she completely invalidates this map. Worst case scenario, she'll have 6 move by now, and with her godly stats, she can afford to just rush in without a care in the world. This is the first time I've sent Lionel this way, but he's also a great asset in this chapter, as he'll have the same amount of guaranteed movement as Leonie, only he can fight back against the enemies. Together, I can't imagine they'll have much trouble getting to the Rogue before he can pilfer the chest.

Cihahqqp oNo6kc5o8 o

Lee gets the growth book from Kreiss. He's about to level up, so might as well.

Icxbizkn o

Eh. Very Lee.

8s6j980a oIffgujzw oAztgbm38 o

Narcus is here mostly for the chests, but while he gets to them, he might as well become a fourth healer.

Repi8g60 o

Okay, that's the first turn. Now the hard part: I need Lionel and Leonie not to lose their gear. If they get hit, it won't be the end of the world, but it'll be very annoying, as I'll have to make sure to kill the Myrmidons with Sasha's slow, 4-move ass. If they dodge, I can just blast them away with Kate's brave bow and keep going.

D0pw2lrh o

For some reason, the girls and Lina move about this first turn.

Pbnsuqee oHqfduqtr o

Ah, shit. Not these guys again! You murdered Lee outside, you fuckers!

Ic60qvht oN7pjxjo0 o

Leonie is a different story, though. She can't be harmed by the likes of them!

Osujikrp o

Time of truth. Don't disappoint me, Leonie!

2ncikzev o

Ah-ha! Good job. That sword will be ours soon!

3vf2crh9 oQx5eh8s3 o

Great! That's just great. Sweet. Perfect, Lionel!

O69c1pcn o

There he goes...

Gmhwzw6u o

I know, it's a shame, but there's really no need for more than two or three thief swords. The loot is more important.

J2bcni1x o

Man... she's kinda move screwed, but those stats are perfect.

T1wfm9st oCh6hezoh o

Lionel struggles a bit more. Seriously? 68% crit and you whiff it?

Iwpjvub9 oXyegpy5e o

Good thing Runan's here.

6mducfe2 oBdeygnxz oN91qrlix o

Now, time to get ourselves a thief's dag-- wait... her dismounted animations are...?

4xop9zoi o

Oh, yes! It's the Return of the Flying Murderprincess, everybody!

Lchcdk2w o

I'm so happy I got to make a GIF of that before the end of the game.

Dtdegg4u o

Not bad. Digging all the luck.

Gxawx67l oYmtw6ahy o

Ahh, Mug is so much fun when it's not locked to the game's worst unit.

7xvlmele oF5hkwp8a o

Okily dokily. One more Myrmidon and the Dark Mage to go.

Xiefw4pf oGwovrhw3 o8bnv5byt o

Seriously, why do they all have a tiny bit of crit?! It drives me up the wall!

Qkngn90f o6t2csice oTjzmmn9x o

Good! Good, good, good, perfect! My highest regards, Lionel, that was a great show!

80qpe0d6 oRgd0ugmj oW84vbnlj o

He even dodged this dumbass. I can already smell the Rogue... it's a foul stench. Let's rid the world of it!

J2qnfew3 oUf6esd0k oEndgbkax o

With the Myrmidon dead, we only need to take care of this idiot, since he's blocking the way forward. Rishel and Runan should suffice.

Spjnbzvn oMst24v2x oKntx68j4 o

But first, let's hand over the new dagger to Lionel. That way, we can starting working on disarming Arkis.

8gwcyfqv o

Very well. Onwards, everybody! We're on a very tight schedule!

Qgs9frgk o

Hwohohohohoh... finally, defense! That reminds me, I completely forgot to give him the dragon potion. Eh, maybe later. There's no time to spare right now.

1c2vymog o

Arkis didn't get to the hallway in time to cut us off entirely, but he's still standing in the middle of the way. Annoying prick...

Aqu5unad oMvkhrmm2 oJn3uxbi1 o

Hand over that lance, "Zemsellian".

5mbuwwzz o

...wait, leather shield...?

Hewdubxb oCd2dhs1o o

Oh, you've got to be kidding me...

Well. That's been Arkis, folks. If he goes for Leonie, he'll be safe, but her defense is so good, I wouldn't be surprised if he tried his luck against Runan or Lionel instead.

Yr2ouano o

Bah... so tempting... alas, Pengaius would weep. Can't have that, now, can we.

Xcpl4ikx oP2t1ytkv oQdc9phpj o

Rounda healing for everybody.

8wvas7o7 o

Fingers crossed, folks. Will Arkis go after the best Sniper, or will he commit suicide?

Yu9luaec o

Oh. There's a healer in the room? Well, that helps. Could you please go after Lionel now, Arkis?

Rx79mwxc oRrgh... don't fall yet, you fools! I cannot escape yet, I'd bump right into Lentzenheimer's lunatics... you need to keep the Razelians occupied!

Weaxzibx o

AAACK! NO, THAT'S HOW HE DIED IN THE OTHER MAP!

Da4adtak oZma0zkl9 o

Goodness gracious...

17yt83tk oRihss4lj o

Ha-- ACK flashbang my eyes!

Ewowvwkz oUttoajfk o

Would you look at that. He has a survival instinct. We'll deal with him in a minute, but first...

Rea8aitl o

Ahahah... hahahah! You who would think to take my precious booty...

Y431qqls oZ0hxr7rv o

Suffer the consequences of your misguided actions!

5wppeuyp o

Now, back to Arkis.

Z1kqegi2 o

Good.

Dvjfdav5 oOmklr4o9 o

BAD! RUNAN, NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? THIS ISN'T THE TIME TO BE A GOOD COMBAT LORD!

Wlpnjezr o

Jesus fuck. 1 HP, everybody. Had Runan gotten strength in that last level, that would've been the end of Arkis right there. And then we would've missed out on a great Eugen scene...

5shgn09b o

...phooey... man, that went about as well as I'd planned. But considering how everything tends to go awfully wrong at every turn, I'm glad to see that, for once, proper planning has triumphed the RNGoddess's devious schemes!

Vhhiskkg o

Narcus is already back to normal? That didn't take long at all. Oh, well.

Tf46jeui o

Oh, hey. Thanks for healing him up, kind Bishop, instead of somebody who can actually fight.

Rx79mwxc oWhat is that man doing!? Did he... lose his weapon!? Oh, goodness... useless buffoon, befitting of a leader like Lentzenheimer! What am I going to do now...?!

Psk9daxk o

Oh, no! Don't do that, man!

Dvath00u oRp5wl5gf o

I want your crossbow, you idiot! Don't try Leonie's patience! It'll be your undoing!

Xz6prwpg oIq2hq6pc oVzu87ibf o

It'd be nice to get these weapons as well, but I don't think we can make it there fast enough.

E9ruetsy oQpqgowle o

Good, very good! Leonie's really been showing off today.

Hdzbfml0 oOzougwks o

I forgot to show these, but these guys are the main source of combat for this map. There's a lot of them, and they're pretty bad, but I'd rather not have to fight them while under arbalest fire, so let's try to get to the courtyard and wait for them there.

Yaobupzm oVu8cohbl o

But first, this idiot needs to go!

Ffmt7nxz o

Sigh... you know, Lionel, for such a beautiful start as yours was, you've become painfully average.

Tchxcvew oR51biuny o90hvxdqo o

The way is clear! Forward!

Eup029nj o

Sure.

Q9rycdec o

Hmm... now there's an idea. But, nah. Not yet, at least.

Yr2cyv4y o

Let's go.

Wd3pj4lc o

Man, that healer must really love Arkis.

Rx79mwxc oFool! Damnable fool! Hopeless buffoon! Fight them barehanded if needed be, but don't let them get to this chamber before I can escape! I won't... I won't die for that deranged kid! Never! I'd rather go back to Wellt and hand myself over!

Ljzkug2h oErgh... should we tell him that we can hear him, loud and clear?

Guhpuhme oBah. Let him be. We're all going to die, anyway. He thinks he's got Lentzenheimer fooled, but there's a reason he put us in this room... there is no escape for us.

Copuooez oThat's a shame... but perhaps if we kill enough Razelians, he'll let us go! Let's do this, fellows!

Exgy1xgk o4slw5hxj oVq9kpfvw o

It's a good thing these guys fail so hard.

Ljzkug2h o...we are all going to die here, aren't we.

Copuooez oWell, perhaps if Mr. High'n'mighty Mage could help us with some of his spells!

Guhpuhme oThis magic isn't easy to use! I can't just throw fireballs about like it's nobody's business! Besides, I can't say I'd mind if Lentzenheimer lost.

Copuooez oWell, I do mind dying, Padre, so get off your ass and help!

Ljzkug2h oWill you all keep it down!? We don't need to start killing each other, the Razelians will do that for us just as well!

Rx79mwxc o...contemptuous fate... should've escaped to Salia... foolish kid...

Cjily9y8 o

I'd like to know why Lentzenheimer's got Gerxel troops even though Zieg abandoned him in the other route and is completely absent in this one. Well, let's make it LP canon that these are those "troops to cover my retreat" Zieg was talking about in 26A that we never got to see. Disregard the fact that they're all called "Zemsellian".

Dbffhctu o

Another one? Nice, they put two in this route and none in the other. Now that's a brilliant move, Kaga.

P5a9kfnv o

That's the range of the last two Myrmidons. Let's not let them reach us just yet. I'd like to leave them for last, so I can easily kill them with Sasha.

3akrxvhv oLgjfo0ob oLqfj8dp9 o

Okay, that works. The Lancers will be upon us in no time, though. Best steel ourselves!

9w2ltzkd oOkuooq12 oInvps2lq o

A-Agh! No, no! Too close, too close! Hurryyyyyyyyyyy the fuck outta theeeereeeee!

Sjl5htjr oFather Lee!

Q7cix2tv oUrk... K-Kreiss...

Sjl5htjr oLean on my shoulder, Father! Just a bit further, and we'll be out of their reach! Come on, you can do it, Father!

Q7cix2tv oY-yes...

Z976mccv o

Oh, thank goodness... I'm pretty sure they can't get him there.

Ljzkug2h oDrat! Almost got one!

Copuooez oWhaddaya mean, "almost"?! We're "almost" dead men, too! Which of those "almost" do you want to see the whole way through, huh!?

Ljzkug2h oDamnit, will you shut up and let me concentrate?! I think he's still within my reach...

Copuooez oBetter be, or else I'm gonna--

Guhpuhme oCalm down! Let the man aim in peace.

Rx79mwxc o...hmm... I wonder...

Vhslqivi o

All right, all we can do now is wait for the Arkis clones.

Nzjlvg8q o

But first things first, healing.

4ze9boel oEnteh... help me...

A3liakj5 oHuh? Letena...?

4ze9boel oFather Lee... he's in trouble. Please, lend me your power...

A3liakj5 oHow can you know that? We cannot see them anymore...

4ze9boel oEnteh!

A3liakj5 oAll right, all right! Hold on...

39nar73i o

Good. He's out of the Reaper's leest. For now, anyway.

Mtyqujbu o

AAAAAACKK! Goodness fuck, good thing I made sure to heal him up! I was convinced he was out of their reach!

Sjl5htjr oFather!!

Q7cix2tv o...I'm... I'm alive? I must have a guardian angel. And I believe I know her name...

Sjl5htjr oLetena... n-never mind that! We'll worry about it later! We need to move! Hurry, this way!

 

Ljzkug2h oWhat?! How is he still alive?! I don't believe this...

Copuooez oYou useless idiot! You clearly can't shoot to save your sorry hide! Give me that thing, mine's got too little range to it!

Ljzkug2h oHey! Stop it! You're going to break it!

Guhpuhme oL-Lay off the man, you!

Rx79mwxc o...perhaps not all is lost yet. These loud imbeciles might make for a good distraction, when the worst comes to the worst...

Pac4u0sg o

Ah, they're finally  here! Hahah... give 'em a warm welcome, guys!

Qz4omqu2 oMuuutk7i oLivhlyuq o

First blood! Wait, doesn't it look a little like Kate's spitting that arrow...?

Knbuqkcq o

You know, Kate, I find it increasingly difficult to justify your presence in the team beyond "LPer bias!". Could you stop with these levels, please? Why is it only you and Maruj...?

3hbggerj o

Whatever. That'll come in handy if I can stop putting Lee in range of arbalesters that crit him.

Ny6c2xos o

Sasha's going to screw us over a bit, now that she's caught up, but oh well, what can you do.

Sjl5htjr oAll right, Father... we should be safe here.

Q7cix2tv oKreiss, go now.

Sjl5htjr oWhat? Father, I am supposed to remain by your side at all times...

Q7cix2tv oMeriel and I can handle ourselves. Besides, in this little corner, nobody can come to harm us.

X4svuaba oYes, Sir Kreiss. You'll be more useful charging alongside the others, I think.

Sjl5htjr oHm... very well. But please, I beg of you both, don't move from here!

X4svuaba oAh, I've no intention of going anywhere. I have a little plan to aid you from here. Tee hee...

Q7cix2tv oOh?

X4svuaba oYou'll see, Bishop. Just you wait until I'm ready...

Xqp16xsd oSihinmju oWdc1sljv o

Oh, c'mon... Sasha, they barely have a chance to get you! You're not supposed to nerf yourself with Mug, only others! What's gotten into you? A conscience? I pray not! Dodge!

Rx79mwxc o...! Princess Sasha!!

Copuooez oMm? Somebody you know? Care to explain why she's so damn slippery?

Rx79mwxc o...this isn't good. If she's here, there'll be no end to my pain...

Ljzkug2h oWhat, that little girl? I think we can handle a girl so small and fragile. It's the others that we need to worry about...

Rx79mwxc oYou don't unders--

Rx79mwxc o...hmm... yes. Yes, you're right. Sorry, I overreacted.

Copuooez oHmph... what a lousy coward...

Clekrqmb o

Where's Arkis going? To Lina? Nah, I wouldn't be surprised if he's planning to run back into the throne room and go "Lord Lentzenheimer, they stole my weapon! What do I do now?". He's dumb enough to try that.

Tprk5b35 oX6ide4ou o

Yeah, no.

Qqtqngsk oYipafhcg o

Sasha, get the heck out of the way! I know 4 move doesn't allow for very fast movement, but...

G1iaj3gv oAlmhu0bw o

Surprisingly enough, Sasha's interference is barely impacting our performance at all. Man, I'm being uncharacteristically lucky today. Isn't that grand... b-but let's not say it too loud. This isn't over.

Fqd6bcgl o

Oh, is it turn 10 already? Well... I think it's time.

O3bbst60 o

Unleash the tactical nuke!

Wzsh2xhu o

Q7cix2tv oGoodness gracious! Saintly Yutona, what am I witnessing?!

X4svuaba oThe power of my grandfather, Sage Maios!

Q7cix2tv oIt's... unbelievable...!

E0bbfclp oQhedwtn8 oN8mk28ko o

Only managed to kill one, but with everyone wounded, they'll be much easier to defeat, and that one Bishop's going to have his hands too full to save them all!

Guhpuhme o...is everyone all right?

Ljzkug2h oI'm in one piece, I think.

Copuooez oWhat was that?! Looked like the sun itself had come down to kill us!

Rx79mwxc oOh, goodness... e-everybody's been gravely injured... where do I even start!?

Cassrrsj oAsh0phyu o6hdrxpi7 o

Wait... there's more than one Bishop? They healed Golgotha and both Myrmidons, so at least it's not like the situation's changed, but...

4m1nepas oD7qg0u5l o5ud8y2sm o

Hah! Yeah, right. As if you could hurt Kreiss of all people!

Kgaubd6v oZzsmgk6r o

Ah, Lionel! Damn your bad defense! No! NO! HE CAN'T DODGE ANYTHING WITH SASHA THERE! FUCK ME HE'S DEAD, THEY ALL GANG UP ON HIM AND TEAR HIM TO SHREDS!

Knhm4oiq o

Ergh... or, they'll all go after Norton. I... can't say I get it.

Hfd8dw7k oLmuymzgc oMtkhklns o

I'm confused, why would they go after Norton? Lionel was a sitting duck!

Kft6xxlp oOorywvus o

Unfortunately for them (but fortunately for me!), the smartest of the lot was also the lamest. He failed miserably.

Wq06d0or o

That was lucky, but let's not press my unlikely good fortune too much. Sasha, stand back!

Rajsqbps o

Oh hey, she could mount. No point in doing that, but sure.

A32v4ixv o

Now that he's free from Sasha's curse, Lionel can go back to being a badass.

Iwlspg41 oM36msvpf o

Defense! Very cool.

Ly6fhulq oHbgeke6f o

Ohohohohohoho... man, compare the two of 'em. Kreiss trades off a lil' bit of speed and luck for a whole lot more defense. He knows that dodgetanks <<<<< tanks. Sure, he has less move even when he's got his horse, but who cares, really? How are you this awesome, Kreiss?

Iypngl9c o9soiefyj o

Pretty sure Letena healed Lee there.

Nfrdihkt oN4upawjo o

Julia's got a herb for no apparent reason. Eh, might as well use it to save Paces a-Hundred Yet Still I Cure uses.

In other news, Norton replaces Lionel next to the wall. If anybody's going to be eating arrows, I'd prefer it was Norton.

Dvwdoqlj oGknj8jxg oBfgrloxk o

Good job, folks! It's almost over. Discounting Arkis, there's only 7 left of them.

Mupcey0w oPz3ey8zq oUb57wtl4 o

There go a couple more. Lionel couldn't quite do it. Meh.

Jdosz7ya o

No problem, that is easily fixed.

Gypnthge o

And another one down! I'm only using the Sunflame because I don't have anyone else left for trading shenanigans. It's not as if the thing's like FE6's legendaries, anyhow. I could have him only use it and it would most likely still last him the entire game.

J1ld9noy oR2a0qgzr o

Now that the dust is starting to settle, Narcus will be heading towards the loot. He also needs to open the door to the central chamber, so there's that. But the loot is more important.

6wu71cgk o7mg62hri o

Rx79mwxc oThis is looking bad... those weaklings outside will not last!

Guhpuhme oHm... my spell is ready. I can cast it right now.

Copuooez oWhat're ya waiting for then, old-timer? A formal invitation? Blow them all to hell!

Guhpuhme oHmm... let me focus...

Qdqgemdv o

Oh, shit! It's the Mage with the AoE spell! He hasn't done much of anything yet.

0ibkgenw o

...and, frankly, considering what he achieved the one time he moved, he might as well not have gotten out of bed today. All he accomplished was to give Norton a high critrate! Poor, poor fool!

Copuooez o...that's IT!?

Guhpuhme oAdmittedly, I was... expecting more.

Copuooez oOh, you useless son of a-- c'mere! I'll kill you myself and use your head as a throwing weapon!

Ljzkug2h oW-Wait! We're still not dead! If we work together, we can still--

Copuooez oYou'll be dead soon, if you get in my way, kid!

Ljzkug2h oA-Argh! Stop him!

Copuooez oNngh! Hands off me, pricks...!

Xl25qaqu oZrfjmmuf oNweh9b00 o

Oh-- oh, come now... 25%, everyone. 30-something% from the arbalest. And he got hit by them all.

Dy7pyimw oDhgvlkhd o

And of course, Wrath's making him obliterate everybody. Thankfully, I don't think there's much of anyone left that can reach him...

Zpaxneyd o

...oh, good grief.

Zpnfe6zt o

This can't be happening. Like, I can understand getting unlucky, but... two chapters in a row!? Really!?

Cnqviuqp oTyvpwp6u oR64z4brm o

G-BUUFFFUUUUUNNYYAAAAAA.... Reeeeeecchh! Okay, he survived. He's alive. He's alive, he's alive...

F8nd5xjh o

...he's FUCKING DEAD, ISN'T HE?!

6w4xhxl9 o

...

G8vxpyfb o

...well. 1.11%. More or less, he got luck since the one time I took a screenshot of his chance to get hit by the arbalest. I can't say I care for a few decimals, honestly. What matters is that it happened twice. In a row. And I was just saying that everything was going smoothly today.

The whole plan went smoothly. Everything was going unbelievably well. And then the RNGoddess flicked the switch and Lionel died. Just like that.

...

...pfft...

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHHAH... HAAHAHAHAHAH...! Hahah... ahah... hehehe... oohh.. ohohah... hah... hoo... oh, man... hah... ahh...

...

Not even pretending here, that was literally my reaction. I just began laughing my ass off, just because of how surreal this is. It really is fucking surreal. I know the pros say not to blame the RNG, but... what is this, man? It's like I'm always stuck with the worst-case scenario.

What was the saying, again? "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me"? Well, what happens when one's fooled 55 times? Whose shame is it, then? God?

2wsgllru o

Well, that's another badass gone. Thanks, RNGoddess. You're lovely, you knew that?

Sg5u9pnd o

I'd cry about Norton's support, but I mean, he doesn't need support. He's got enough defense to never die to anything, which in my case, is an imperative requirement for anybody to be considered usable. Quite frankly, if I had to pick between losing Lee like in the other route, and losing Lionel, I'd take this. It sucks, don't get me wrong, but it sucks less, so there's that.

Ugg3ooxq o

Who wants to bet that I'll also lose Kate before we can get to the good parts with her?

Fiiavr8h o

Poor Norton, man. He just lost a good friend. No wonder he's extra pissed off. Also, that Dakruon choice's gotten way too difficult in the span of two maps, hasn't it? Urk...

Dxqnnxmn o

My God, Norton. He's got the slowest sword arm this side of Lieberia, but if he makes it there, hoo boy... it ain't gonna be pretty.

Ssoiso9o oXbisuolt o

Well, it's over, at any rate. Literally the last dudes got Lionel. Can this situation possibly get any more laughable?

Oh, wait, it can. I still have to kill Letena off to stop her from being an idiot. Oh, c'mon... Letena, you better fuck Kreiss good and long after all of this!

Nlzvvsi4 o

With everyone else (and Lionel) dead, the Bishop finally has the time to heal the injuries Arkis took from the Aura Rain.

Fkbjgjs8 oWxvtl35n o

Not Narcus too, you fucks...

Bowt2bi3 oGeadlmjv o

Become Lee, Narcus. That'll give you a tiny bit more bulk. That's what you need right now.

F9vnsqjc o

While Narcus gets here, it's time to lure the Myrmidons closer to Sasha.

Pmwrgmzs oSlvn6war o

Bummer. But I suppose it had to happen eventually.

Ehf9xrnd o

Oh, for fuck's sake... I... unnnnhhh... I am so very tired.

Sftmzaca o

Luck is a cruel mistress. It leads you on, making you think things have finally taken a turn for the better, and then boom. Everything's shit. Life's shit. Bah.

Lh5m5fu2 oXtxbcatf oZ3o9k6fb o

...ohh, now you're just taking the piss... must... resist... urge... to punch screen... think of something nice...

Quote
G6bwpi5h oC5fzpi5l o
 
Xntledym o

...ah, much better, yes.

Cnc3algd oQa6uy3nd o

Hurray. We accomplished nothing.

52efxrrm oXgzk38hd oRnq7ud2j o

Thankfully, Narcus, much like Lee, can take two shots. Just barely, but he can. Otherwise, this would've been painful.

Rxl7vyuz o

Oh, fuck you. What's going on?! Why is everyone so incompetent all of sudden? I know, Sasha, but... Sasha wasn't anywhere near Lionel, and look how that went!

Dfjn6sj2 o

Well, the good news is, Narcus has nearly made it to the sweet loot.

2ijgsgkn o

And Leonie nailed the bastard this time around! Good!

Ufhgb9ia o

Bit of an odd moment to do this, but I suddenly remembered about it and wanted to get it out of the way before forgetting again.

Kjoml4o2 o7xnqppgj o4tutjqf0 o

That's more like it! Now he's actually on his averages!

Zvhqsd5c oWozfqqpy oO0v7uma8 o

Finally, our things! As well as more things.

7iynoquj oBo6gkd8c o

One more Myrmidon, and we're good to go. Don't fail me, guys!

5tkhqkt6 oUicn6oxx oCwaaijlh o

Those guys are so annoying... oh, but the hour of their defeat will soon arrive!

Copuooez oYou can stop trying. It's over. We're good as dead.

Ljzkug2h oWe can't give up! So long as we still live, we must do what we can! Didn't you say Lentzenheimer would let us go if we stopped the enemy?

Copuooez oDid I? Can't say I remember.

Guhpuhme oO Lord Gerxel... be with us in this, our hour of need...

Hrptgav5 oZhcrgaww oEobjl0jc o

Some Jeiganing from Rishel, and...

J36w5w6n oXx8znhc5 o

There, finally! At last, we can make some progress.

Aipt1rhf o

Hwahahahahahahah... she's so good, even without a mount. Love this girl, seriously.

0sny0z4h o

This is ours now, too!

9vr7eybx o

Narcus goes back to Narcus form.

Qhzy9uey o4kirymzi o

And he gets healed some more! Lee is this close to level 30. Let's hope he ends(?) his leveling career on a good note.

Tdfr88ul o

Norton is the one. Norton will get Runan through the game, no matter what, much like Garo'll carry Holmes. They're the best. Thank you, you ugly bastards, you.

Iragpdji o

Ahahah... it's time... it's finally time! Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

Wlzexirv o

The swift potion. You know what it does?

Tyacfjlw o

Yep. It's not this game's boots - it's better than the usual boots! Throw this sucker on Tom, and he'll suddenly have Kreiss's movement. Now that's awesome.

I was thinking the best two candidates for this are Tom and Garo. The idea of a speed tank is just too good to ignore, but on the other hand, Garo is my best combat unit that's held back by his bad movement. I'll let you guys decide. You've got until the route split. In the meantime, this sucker's going in the convoy. Feel free to propose somebody else, too, if you think there's a better option. No, Pengaius, Arkis is not a better option.

O5ldpvrs o

Leevel time! Let it be a good one, Lee.

Thpdikv8 o

Ah, yes, great! That's perfect, as far as I'm concerned.

Eqkkcleo o

I'm going to skip ahead a bit now, because all we're going to do for a few turns now is move forward and wait for Narcus to get to the middle room's door.

Czp97rnq oErkg8pub oSdthnkvx o

While we waited, I sent Runan and Leonie ahead to try and stop Arkis from...

...Really, Arkis? Are you really trying to go back to the throne room? What could possibly have possessed you to believe that's a good idea by any stretch of the imagination?! Lentzie's going to have Golgotha tear your head off! Get back here, you dumbass!

7xommc8a o

Well, whatever. Rishel does a magical cape flip, and...

Nra4sqvd o

Suddenly, Narcus is here!

71ot29ba o

Ah-HAH! It's payback ti--

Wait... only one Bishop? But I thought... didn't he heal three people that one turn? What's up with that?

Ljzkug2h oA-Ah! They're here!

Guhpuhme oMay the Lord save us all... we're done for!

Copuooez oI don't want to die! Gaaaaahhh! M-My weapon, give me back my weapon! I don't want to die unarmed and helpless like a rat!

Ljzkug2h oOh, who cares-- here it is! Go ahead and shoot me in the back of the head! It doesn't matter anymore!

Guhpuhme oO Gerxel... wait for me, your loyal servant, before the gates of Purgatory...!

Rx79mwxc o...this is it. Hang back, don't draw attention to yourself... let them bear the brunt of the enemy's anger...

...ooohhhhh the Myrmidons all had fruits, that's right! Heh, how didn't I think of that before. Well, anyway.

W2j9qyyx o

See that? I want that. Please give me that.

Xj09v4tw o

Ljzkug2h oArgh... I knew it. This was the only way it could've ended!

Humcvegg o

Ljzkug2h oGwah! Mother... I hope... Lord Lentzenheimer won't go after you... now that I've fallen...!

Wighvwvz o

Keep 'em coming!

Unkcq1h9 o

There goes the second (and last) arbalester!

Ljzkug2h o...thank you. It was truly tiresome to hear those idiots' incessant bickering.

Uforafww o

Rishel wears down the High Mage.

Rdlbhc6k o

We're done for now. Alas... I also have to kill off Letena to ensure she doesn't break Kreiss's heart, so...

4ze9boel oNngh... What's going on in there? There's so much noise...

A3liakj5 oLetena, it's too dangerous to go in. We must stay here, and--

4ze9boel oAh, I can't stand it! I think Sir Kreiss is in danger! I can't bear it!

Nganqhu7 o

4ze9boel oEnteh! Here, hold on to these for me!

A3liakj5 oWha-- Letena! Don't!

Igrrfnax o

4ze9boel oY-You will not harm Sir Kreiss!

Auqgbfeg oCi9itthy o

Oh, I can't believe it... her last actions in (this) life, and she fails miserably to do anything of note! She only silenced the Bishop! That wasn't the one I wanted silenced, you dolt!

Dfv8a0bi o9kgpuegg o

Oh, well. There we go. Brace for impact, girl... and please forgive me! You will thank me one day!

Fzpjqyyr o

A3liakj5 oLetena!! No!

U4x616vb oJktllcsz o

A3liakj5 oNo... what... what am I going to tell Sir Kreiss...?

Wkq7bdrq oVbfftcs7 o

Well, that's one use of that thing wasted, but at least there's still 10 left. Maruj will appreciate the thing.

Yp5wcoq5 o

Runan, double back and give Narcus his dagger!

Xdtugytu o

For starters, Narcus steals the bowman's--

Gs3xeqvr o

...

Tjg8k4au oDlimrcnm o3bppofdx o

...Kreiss steals the Mage's tome!

Ickkduv2 o

And now he's down!

Guhpuhme oGeneral Zieg... if you've escaped successfully, then... my work... is complete... I go to our Lord's side... without regrets...!

Ed521vj6 oOffwheex o

These guys will keep the bowman occupied while Sasha arrives to slit his throat.

Copuooez oY-You filthy... let go of me! What're you doing!? I ain't gonna surrender! I won't be killed like a dog, you dogs!

Rx79mwxc o...not yet... as soon as there's an opening... hmph. That idiot needs to last long enough, or they'll notice me...

Qhis1msf o

Hey! I want that staff of yours, too! Don't waste the uses while Sasha gets here!

Paysijsh o

So anyway, let's skip ahead to when she--

...

...oh, I don't... Arkis!

Eyw01q2b oLord Lentzenheimer, they stole my weapon! What do I do now?

Nc8hplwt oYou idiot! Go out there again unless you want the girl to die!

Eyw01q2b o...but how am I to fight without--

Nc8hplwt oDon't fight! Just let them kill you! Don't you get it yet!? You were never supposed to win!

Eyw01q2b o...

Nc8hplwt o...although... on second thought, so long as you're here, you'll make for a fine meatshield! Come here and die for your master, mutt of Runan!

Vlfmpzot oGwahahahahah! Hwahahahah!

Eyw01q2b o...

Woxr37yb o

Well, at any rate, Sasha's here.

Wjom2wnd oV6n9xsmd oRunjd56n o

You! Time to die! Hand over the loot!

Copuooez oA-Ack! N-no! N-n-n-n-no, wait! I've changed... I've changed my mind! I don't wanna die! Take me prisoner, please! I yield! I y--

Rijqfkxl o

Copuooez oG-Gwaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuurgh! Unnh... You're... the girl he was so scared of... now I get it... urk!

3oo9o7zk o

Nice! Never would say no to a bow that fires four times. Even if it weighs a ton and a half.

Dhmujwld o3vlc51fl o

Not much else left to do but to recruit Arkis, save the civilians, and confront the bastard himself and his bodyguard.

Yrua3ofa oEakfwym6 o7nmdwuk0 o

Oh, well. Might as well save him, I mean, he can't be worth too much experience, right?

Rxlbwysy o

HP 40% - Strength 10% - Skill 35% - Speed 55% - Defense 10% - Magic 40% - Luck 60% - Mastery 35% - MOVE 10%

...what am I looking at!? Where do I even start? Lina is a unit that has a M O V E M E N T   G R O W T H! As high as Leonie's! And she's a Cavalier, to boot! That makes her awesome, right? No! No, it doesn't, because she has a base strength of 3 on a 10% growth, a base defense of 2 (that's lower than Lee's right now), a base mastery of TWO! She can't use anything! She's completely useless! Lina's the best argument for anybody who wants to prove that horses and movement aren't the only things a unit needs to be good. You know all those people who say "horse = top tier"? Well, show them this! This is literally as horse as it gets! She's got a higher move base than normal, and a huge growth for it! And she's completely worthless, much like her worthless boyfriend!

She gains Canto, Vantage and Adept, but none of that matters because she's got a horrible strength growth and a horrible mastery. She can't fight worth beans. You know, at least the likes of Miranda, Ewan and Nino use magic, which, no matter how bad you are, will always deal at least SOME damage to cannon-fodder enemies! What is this bitch going to do, exactly? Nothing, that's what. She's there to re-recruit Arkis so they can both bond over their uselessness at the bench. Full stop. A completely unusable unit, and that's saying something, considering I've managed to make the likes of Matthis, Wade and Tom usable.

Ymmegjro o

Rx79mwxc oThey're distracted... NOW!

Gl41diog o

Hey, where do you think you're going? Come back, man! Sasha wants to play with you!

Rerityzh o

Whatever, I'll deal with that pesky Bishop later. For now, let's check out our bosses. Lentzie's the same as he was in 26A, but what about Golgotha?

Stvhejec o

...blistering barnacles, what the heck is that?! Golgotha is a godly Swordmaster with an awesome weapon that moves. He also has Astra, which I believe I've mentioned in the past. If it triggers, he'll throw no less than five swings at his unfortunate opponent. Not something you want to be on the receiving end of.

Jfwonsgo oB3oruqtc o

Let's face this challenge the only way I know how to: with Norton, and some insurance charms!

Ls9wuvm8 o

Here he comes!

Uijufly6 oN7tjswsq oLi3azkme o

Very simple. Golgotha's a really mysterious character.

Sdejd6uf oBfqjkvvz o

Thankfully, the old man...

B7vvjw4v o

Just can't compare to Norton.

4jabgbrc oIudoexnw o

Norton best swordsman in Lieberia confirmed.

Llwvz5tb oNa0ekcq6 oXz9thm4g o

There we go, it's over. It barely even started at all!

Ob3qjb5m o

I can't say the same to you, I'm afraid. But hey, thanks!

Xgl2wvns o

Movement, girl! That's literally all you need right now! I mean, you don't need anything, it would just make me a very happy man.

N6qvao9z oMc0za1bm oJezb0ht5 o

Nc8hplwt oThat useless Golgotha... I can't believe it! Such a waste of gold... you! Mutt of Runan! Get up and come here! Protect your master!

Eyw01q2b o...if you didn't have Lina, I swear...

Nc8hplwt oI don't recall ordering you to speak!

Eyw01q2b o...

Kwo7h0jd o

ARKIS! The hell are you doing!? Are you seriously shielding him!? This game's AI, man! It's so brilliant... and brilliantly dumb, at the same time!

Jayfkbrz o

Rejoin the good guys, you dumbass. And count your lucky stars that I even bothered to save you.

Ttrf98c0 oOvlt6qbt o

Zxqkvuce oI was, but I was rescued! You don't need to worry about me anymore. You can stop fighting now.

B8qnojud oThank goodness... Man, that outfit is stuffy! No wonder those Shadow Knights are always so irritable...

0zfd96rn o You're one to talk!

3hlgnhmn o

4lt3brpp o Oh, good lord...

Zxqkvuce oGo get him, Sweetie! I'll be fighting right alongside you!

B8qnojud oS-Sweetie?

Zxqkvuce o...Was that a little too forward?

B8qnojud oNah, I kinda like it. Let's go, Lina!

3up1drui o

Yeah, let's go. Let's go get killed, because Lentzie completely obliterates both of the brainless lovebirds. Bah... join your girlfriend in the bench, you idiot, and make way for the actual heroes of this story.

Lkiawhli oAhgbyi2e o

Namely, the ugly guy who's going to be doing the exact same thing he did in the other route. I hope, at least.

Obypsanq o
 
X60isllr o
 
Rtmrcem9 o

 

Jw8tv9on oRyqhyifn o

PWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! AGAIN, HE DID IT AGAIN! HE HUMILLIATED THE BASTARD YET AGAIN! Ahhh life's good sometimes.

95u75pgc o1w15mkkn o

Lentzenheimer, you've been a thorn in everybody's side for too long. It's time for some old-fashioned revenge, courtesy of the woman you attempted to kill AND have killed!

Qomczp1y o
 
C3m74xtr o

Tza0nwom oWhat's wrong, Lentzenheimer? You look like you've seen a ghost.

Qzgpos9m oDamn that incompetent Vega... They told me he was the best of the best!

P1zzgcas o Well, they bamboozled you. Now he's a shopkeep at Fort Ligria, and you're about to die!

Tza0nwom oYou never can trust an assassin. Why don't you try killing me yourself? I'll fight you right here and now.

Fcvimxao o

Dude, have you seen the state of you? You're going to be joining mommy and daddy real soon.

Aozbtv3q oRvatzzpg o

I hope they're watching this!

Gsi5lpgo o

KA-BOOM! It's all over. This time, it's really over.

Hf9fymue o

Bleh. But this is the reason I trained her, and now it's done. She's done it, and for that, I am proud of her.

Ioafnr0d o4mpgqkzm o

Tza0nwom oIt's over, Lentzenheimer.

Qzgpos9m oW-W-Wait...! I'll make you a deal! I'll lift the bounty on you... A-And here, you can have the Lukuud! What do you say? Not a bad deal, right?

Tza0nwom o...Pathetic.

Qzgpos9m oY-You're lowering your sword? Oh, thank you! Bless you, Julia! I'll make it up to you, I swear!

0zfd96rn o Your arm is gone, you idiot. She's just leaving you to bleed out.

Slofxiab o

Tza0nwom oHe knew that my sword is meant for those who would threaten me and my friends, not for killing the innocent. And while you're far from innocent, worm, you're also no longer a threat. That's why I lowered my sword.

Tza0nwom oNow do us all a favor and crawl in a hole somewhere to die.

F4aswdy8 o ...Jesus fuck! She may be awful, but she has a way with words! She just murdered him without murdering him!

Qsrouqhe o

4lt3brpp o Oh, shit!

Jjtmzetg oJfpugvfl o

0zfd96rn o You know, you could've just stabbed her, instead of standing there and letting her know that she's fallen right into your trap in America.

Ozacffhh o

The screen goes dark, and...

Dcn2gzfm o

SPLAT!

7ssiuhca o

The insane manchild is killed for the third, and final, time.

3mpzrbyi oJp3o7q1i o

Man... I usually do this with Vega to get the event Julia has in the other route, but goodness gracious, that was so awesome. Way better than Vega's version! Vega just throws a petty insult at Lentzie and grabs the sword. Here, Lentzenheimer is so scared shitless, he hands over the sword before trying to stab Julia with a dagger, I assume. I like to think that she murders him with his own sword. Just adding to the poetic justice even more. Old Dholm must be laughing to tears down in hell.

Cb76romg o

Killing Lentzie with Julia nets you the Lukuud.

Cvsesiwd o

Look at that thing. It's not even locked to her! Imagine Sasha soaring through the skies with this beauty... oh, boy. Now there's an idea.

A46vgjsm o

I could capture right now, but we're not quite done.

Roj54b3m o

This chicken continues to run, for example! Ergh... into a cell, for some unfathomable reason.

Rx79mwxc oHah... hahh... huff... o-oh, Saintly Yutona, that child is a veritable hellspawn! I pray that this is the right cell...

38ti9te7 oHellooooo~? Are you in here? Don't be afraid! I won't hurt you too much, I promise! Tee hee~!

Tkfukxsh o

Rx79mwxc o...yes! Yes, this is the one! The secret passage...! Why did the ancient Razelians even put a secret passage in a cell? Maybe this wasn't always one...

38ti9te7 oAhah! I found you! You lose~!

Rx79mwxc oGah! What am I doing, wasting time like this!? Run!

V2ybz1rs o

38ti9te7 oEheheheheh--

38ti9te7 oHey... where'd you go?

Opeu0fcl oD'awww... that's no fun.

Rjrobal2 o

All right, then. Let's rescue the civilians.

Thfxiyov o

Ergh...

Qfwjgzws o

...oh, so that's why this guy is named "crossdresser" in the portraits folder Aethin sent me!

Hqhsopz1 o

Oh no. What a nightmare. What am I going to do now. I have fallen right into their trap. In America. So scurry. A brilliant plan, Lentzen-- oh, nevermind, you're already resting in pieces. Literally!

Zsuwmrhi o

...yeah, they didn't last long at all.

Gaz0ic0l o

One of 'em got Leonie this level, and that's about it. Probably her worst level thus far, which is quite telling. Also, they all had money bags, so that's a pretty sizeable chunk of money we got out of them. It's nothing more than a nifty little bonus compared to the move potion, but it's still better than 26A's crap herbs.

I7opt4rg o

See, the real reason I wanted to wait until after Golgotha and Lentzenheimer's deaths to open that door was so I could deliver on my promise and, well, actually give Arkis a level! Let's see if he can pull it off without dying horribly.

Wf2nqn5y oKsqzjmbe o8ppp8bzp o

First, you help him a little.

Ftsnhg69 oLelxslln oSx22ffg4 o

Oh, my! He actually did... well? I cannot believe it myself!

Cqln9sem o

He still got wrecked in return, though. Lee...

Zfkcp3tw oCknjiwbw o

Thank you.

Nxwr3qji oIlpd4clm o

Jesus, that's an angry slash! Dude's probably overexcited by the prospect of actually doing something!

T9yyevts o

...er...

Lnuvf3ao o

Welp. I was counting on him getting enough experience from chipping to level up, but since he just ruined the Rogue with a crit, he couldn't quite get enough.

Sooo yeah. That's been Arkis. Can't say I didn't try.

H1ev9cxv o

Maybe I'll give him a level in some other map, if I've the deployment slots. Read, it won't happen. Sorry, not sorry.

Oh, well. In any case! Whoa, what a rollercoaster! This map has had it all. Plans going well, luck being awful, drama, comedy, death, unhealthy amounts of gore... what an update! I personally loved making it. Please tell me if I went a little overboard with the character dialogue. It was just too much fun, I couldn't contain myself! And with that, I leave you. Farewell, and we shall see each other again soon! Adios, amigos!

Death count: Attrom
                        Juliattisnacordst
                        Sharon
                        Krishna
                        Indiana Jones
                        Lee

                        The Roger The Paladin
                        Lionel
                        Letena

*26A only

Reset count: 2 (Runan: 1 - Katri: 1)

Dullahan's done with my incompetence: 7

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1effsrbm o...Hwahahahah! And then-- and then, she cut your throat, just like that! Bwahahahahahah! You should've seen your face! I'm laughing just thinking about it!

Qzgpos9m oThis truly is hell. No doubt about it. Where even is Mother?

1effsrbm oYour mother? Hah! You killed her in cold blood, and now you want to run crying to her? How the tables have turned! Well, sorry to disappoint you, but she's up there, because unlike you and I, she was a good person. Ah, if only I hadn't let my greed get the best of me... perhaps I'd be up there with her.

1effsrbm oBut, looking on the bright side, us being here means I get to "repay" you for leaving me to die at Zemsellia!

Qzgpos9m oFather...!

1effsrbm oWhat? Come on, out with it, boy! You can't scare me any longer! You've lost that dumb sword of yours, and you know why? BECAUSE YOU WILLINGLY HANDED IT OVER! Hehehehehehahahahahah!

Qzgpos9m oUrrrghhh...! Runan Selius...! This is all your fault...! Curse you, Runan Selius! I CURSE YOUR NAME! RUNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN SELIUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS!!!

 

 

 

Rmyu7cpq o...where did I go wrong... when did I let my family turn into such a mess...

      8v5hn3pn o      If you think your fate was bad, wait until I tell you about mine, ma'am.

Zpnioeae oAt least you still had a family. I barely even had myself when I died!

Rmyu7cpq o...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This chapter was one of the biggest pains outside of 34. I could never get the Swift Potion from here in my attempts.

you win some, you lose some

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The girls at the direct seemed to love the game's looks! Am I alone here? Were they just paid to say those thin-- I mean, of course, but... what does everyone else think?

I'm not the most positive about the game in general, but I do think the latest showing did make it look significantly better. I'm still not a fan of the art style or anything because it's a little rough.

Edited by Tryhard
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Runan: Die, you bastard!
Lina: No, Lord Runan! This is not a Shadow Knight! It's Arkis!
Runan: Oh, I see.
Runan: Die, Arkis!

Kind of a shame he is still alive, though. Especially considering those who died in his stead. At this rate Lina may have to take on Gwenchaos.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He's ever-so-slightly worse than his peers.

I do love the way that Arkis, who is completely new to the #shadowlancerlife is only slightly worse than the fully trained soldiers, and is not only generally less experienced in combat (level difference of 6) but spent most of that time as a horseback fighter, yet still he manages to be faster than them, tldr: shadow lancers suck

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

BAD! RUNAN, NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? THIS ISN'T THE TIME TO BE A GOOD COMBAT LORD!

Good thing poorly levelled under-trained Arkis is still strong enough to withstand heavily invested Runan adept procs

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Man, that healer must really love Arkis.

I may have bribed a few soldiers into making sure Arkis wouldn't die

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

G8vxpyfb o

Lionel, more like Dienel

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Feel free to propose somebody else, too, if you think there's a better option.

Well I'd suggest...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

No, Pengaius, Arkis is not a better option.

aww... I was going to suggest Lee for farther healing range, sheesh

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

U4x616vb o

👌YEETena👌

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, my! He actually did... well? I cannot believe it myself!

Unmounted Arkis, given practically no exp

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sooo yeah. That's been Arkis. Can't say I didn't try.

I mean you could have set up a choke point to give him more than one kill

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Maybe I'll give him a level in some other map, if I've the deployment slots. Read, it won't happen. Sorry, not sorry.

Well, Lionel's spot just opened up, just sayin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Nintendo, you bastards, give me a date for Luigi's Mansion 3! The game looks too good!

Well, at the very least, they finally gave me designs for 3H that I actually like. Edgy!Dimitri's amazing, and although I initially disliked the older Edelgard, the design grew on me. Claude is still rather uninspired, in my opinion, but oh well, what can you do. It's better than what we had before. Only thing is, now I'm even more worried about Hanneman. Dude's old, the timeskip's yet another factor that decreases his chances of being playable. I know five years isn't that much, but still. There's one character I want to use, damnit, my favourites always die in everything. Forgive me for being worried.

Yeah, I'll admit, way back when Luigi's Mansion 3 was announced I played through the first two in preparation. Between that, Banjo&Kazooie in smash ultimate, Link's Awakening remake (my personal favourite 2D Zelda), Breath of the Wild's sequel, and the new design on Dmitri, I'm pretty happy with E3.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahah... brilliant! Let me try. Here's a word in the english language that begins with C and ends with NT.

Also of note is that it ends in UNT. Not just NT.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
 

Street

This is fun! Now for one that begins with D and ends with ICK

 

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQak5NkpM38KXz6BuzZtOi
 

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Good way to honor him. Although, the Dakruon still exists, you know. He's one of the potential candidates for that one use.

Yeah, but I'm not counting my chickens before they hatch. Besides, I needed the new user name. Mad Manakete was a bit generic.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jesus Christ tie him to his bed before the ruins your house.

He moved out quite a while back. Not my problem anymore.
 

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

A reference, to be sure.

A bizarre one yet. A facebook troll that used to frequent a page I visited went by the name of Boss Hogg. That was perhaps his only post that didn't involve his genitals. I believe with Holmes similar sentiments, I have deduced Hogg's true identity after these 8 long years. It was Kaga.
 

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

We are the master race.

Careful. That's the type of talk that got VICETOLUCT banned.
 

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

- Horseman.
- The Brilliant Dumbass.
- Merlinus hate.
- The Roger The Paladin
-
Juliattisnacordst
-

-Runan smile/split personality
- Roger the knight and The Roger the Paladin are the same guy
-Holmes is mentally handicapped
-Maerchen is neutred
-Slaver Hate
-Maruj Plane
-Why is Zeiss on the prep screen
-Badass Matthis
- Tom's a Dodge-Tank
- Song parodies
- Lee puns
- Arkis accidentally insults people
-edgy shop-keep
-Footballman
-Sp00ky axemen (well that was last LP)
-paces a hundred yet I cure
-Sasha's a monster

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Icxbizkn o

 

SkillfulLee.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
N91qrlix o

Now, time to get ourselves a thief's dag-- wait... her dismounted animations are...?

Wally's at therapy. He's seen things that he couldn't handle.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
 

Oh. There's a healer in the room? Well, that helps. Could you please go after Lionel now, Arkis?

Rx79mwxc oRrgh... don't fall yet, you fools! I cannot escape yet, I'd bump right into Lentzenheimer's lunatics... you need to keep the Razelians occupied!

So that healer actually went to the effort of healing Arkis? What the hell?
 

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sjl5htjr oLean on my shoulder, Father! Just a bit further, and we'll be out of their reach! Come on, you can do it, Father!

*Leen

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Zpnfe6zt o

This can't be happening. Like, I can understand getting unlucky, but... two chapters in a row!? Really!?

Three if you count 26a. My God. Mirror factory incident confirmed.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

U4x616vb oJktllcsz o

A3liakj5 oNo... what... what am I going to tell Sir Kreiss...?

At least this death was intentional.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Rxlbwysy o

HP 40% - Strength 10% - Skill 35% - Speed 55% - Defense 10% - Magic 40% - Luck 60% - Mastery 35% - MOVE 10%

Well, we have the worst cav of all time. Even Fiona can't compete.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
4jabgbrc oIudoexnw o

 

No one tanks like Norton,
No one shanks like Norton,
No one decimates enemy ranks like Norton.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eyw01q2b oLord Lentzenheimer, they stole my weapon! What do I do now?

Nc8hplwt oYou idiot! Go out there again unless you want the girl to die!

Eyw01q2b o...but how am I to fight without--

Nc8hplwt oDon't fight! Just let them kill you! Don't you get it yet!? You were never supposed to win!

Eyw01q2b o...

Pengaius must have loved this chapter for the Arkis relevance.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Fcvimxao o

Dude, have you seen the state of you? You're going to be joining mommy and daddy real soon.

Post Norton, Lentzenheimer isn't seeing much at all.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
3mpzrbyi oJp3o7q1i o

Man... I usually do this with Vega to get the event Julia has in the other route, but goodness gracious, that was so awesome. Way better than Vega's version! Vega just throws a petty insult at Lentzie and grabs the sword. Here, Lentzenheimer is so scared shitless, he hands over the sword before trying to stab Julia with a dagger, I assume. I like to think that she murders him with his own sword. Just adding to the poetic justice even more. Old Dholm must be laughing to tears down in hell.

Sorry Zeig. You just got one upped. That shopkeep must be upset too.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Rx79mwxc o...yes! Yes, this is the one! The secret passage...! Why did the ancient Razelians even put a secret passage in a cell? Maybe this wasn't always one...

38ti9te7 oAhah! I found you! You lose~!

Rx79mwxc oGah! What am I doing, wasting time like this!? Run!

V2ybz1rs o

38ti9te7 oEheheheheh--

38ti9te7 oHey... where'd you go?

Opeu0fcl oD'awww... that's no fun.

Don't be so sad Murderprincess. There'll be other victims.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Rmyu7cpq o...where did I go wrong... when did I let my family turn into such a mess...

      8v5hn3pn o      If you think your fate was bad, wait until I tell you about mine, ma'am.

Zpnioeae oAt least you still had a family. I barely even had myself when I died!

Rmyu7cpq o...

Surprised we don't have a low percent crit help group here.

Edited by The Roger The Paladin
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 6/11/2019 at 12:35 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Surprisingly an easy snare to escape, given fair use law allows parody... which is ultimately what I feel everything I've done firmly falls into. https://fairuse.stanford.edu/overview/fair-use/what-is-fair-use/

Ah, copyright laws and fair use. Concepts that, for better and worse, have extremely broad definitions.

I really do wonder if a revision of them would be worth the trouble, or if it would end up doing more harm than good.

On 6/11/2019 at 12:35 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

There's a surprising amount of things people have done in their sleep. Sleep-eating, sleep-working, sleep-murder, sleep-sex (which on at least one occasion was used as a defense in a rape case). My own issue has lead to some frustration not because I've put on weight (that'd hardly be an issue given my metabolism is sufficient that I can live off junk food for a week with no weight gain) but rather because in a sleeping state I have rather little regard for whose food I'm taking, expiry dates, etc.

...I think I have a fear of sleep-walking now.

On 6/13/2019 at 7:40 AM, Aethin said:

it of info about "Stealth Hunter" -- the Japanese name is ハイドハンター Haido Hantaa, which seems to be "Hide Hunter." (For what it's worth, there's also ハイドナイト Haido Naito "Hide Knight" unused in the game.) No clue if the first word was supposed to be "hide" as in "hidden" or as in "animal hide," so I went with the first and made it clearer as Stealth Hunter. Earlier ideas included Captain, though now that people mention it, Admiral would've been good, too.

My guess would be that it's "hide" as in "animal hide", but I also have little knowledge of the Japanese language (other than WW2 facts about why the Japanese forces were able to decode English so easily, and the Navajo Code Talker). I do find it to be an odd name regardless, though. Unless it's referencing that Holmes route has more monster enemies than Runan, but even then there's nothing that's implied that Holmes skinned and sold the monsters he killed. Captain and Admiral sound like solid alternative names.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nintendo, you bastards, give me a date for Luigi's Mansion 3! The game looks too good!

It seems that Nintendo is combining the best of 1 and 2. I realy need to get around to buying a switch. There are already good games on there, even more are coming.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, at the very least, they finally gave me designs for 3H that I actually like. Edgy!Dimitri's amazing, and although I initially disliked the older Edelgard, the design grew on me. Claude is still rather uninspired, in my opinion, but oh well, what can you do. It's better than what we had before. Only thing is, now I'm even more worried about Hanneman. Dude's old, the timeskip's yet another factor that decreases his chances of being playable. I know five years isn't that much, but still. There's one character I want to use, damnit, my favourites always die in everything. Forgive me for being worried.

Claude is a Fire Emblem lord with a beard, so that's a win in my books. Dmitri went from the least interesting guy to the most, and I could see Edelgard supposedly having two routes.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Also I took a quick glance at the Treehouse 3H direct... and I know I'm probably alone here, but billions of billious blue blistering barnacles balderdash, Byleth's sleeves following his arms' movements is SO distracting! They should just trail behind him, not follow his god damned arms like there's some sort of weird phantom living in his coat! How can they do this!? And the worst part is, it's inconsistent! The sleeves don't always follow his arms - instead, half the time they just clip through his arms and the scenery! How could they possibly fuck this up so badly!?! THIS ISN'T FE! THAT'S IT, I AIN'T BUYING THIS GAME UNTIL THEY FIX BYLETH'S COAT!!

Oh, and the entire game's hideous, but THAT DOESN'T COMPARE TO BYLETH'S COAT BEING POORLY ANIMATED! #FIXBYLETH

I didn't really have time this week to look in detail at the Direct, but from the little I've seen... Yeah, I'm annoyed that they kept Echoes clipping issues, since that was my biggest criticism towards the game graphically.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I still have one big complaint, though: boy is it ugly. It's horrendous, damnit! Graphics don't make or break a game by themselves, but this game's just awful, I'm sorry. Everything clips, the textures are horrendously low-quality (and that's just inexcusable for a console that also houses the likes of Smash Bros Ultimate and Super Mario Odyssey), the generic troops assigned to each unit keep disappearing and reappearing as the camera moves - heck, they don't even seem to do anything substantial! The shadows are funky! Map movements are as stiff as those from PoR, a 14-year-old game! The animations... kinda are, too! Is it just me? The girls at the direct seemed to love the game's looks! Am I alone here? Were they just paid to say those thin-- I mean, of course, but... what does everyone else think

I constantly have to remind myself that IS had 4-5 years to work with the engine they used for the 3DS games, so Echoes looked and moved great for a reason. Meanwhile, Three Houses is their first game on the Switch, and I know Awakening played it safe (maybe a little too safe) animation and graphics wise, so I'm not surprised that the game isn't amazing graphically

That said, while I know that the graphics won't impact my enjoyment of the gameplay at all, this is really the first time where the animations and look of the game actually bother me at points. Just, the odd small details irk me, and I can see them building up over time. I know the Switch isn't a powerhouse, but the game looks like it could pass for Playstation 2 game at points, in a bad way.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahahahah, dude. How could you forget somebody so big?

Once again, I remember what a character did while forgetting the names of locations.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, so do I. Him and Eugen had a really fun dynamic. If it makes you feel better, though, we'll see him again.

I'm glad to hear that he'll come back.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah, I remember that. To be fair, I always did say I liked Runan better.

Yeah, you did. I'm still missing the days back when the worst we could say about Holmes was that he was a little rude. Although from a certain point of view, you could have been talking about gameplay performance back there, where Holmes actually does have some credit for being the "better protagonist".

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Poetic justice at its finest. But nah, couldn't be. That'd imply he lost weight, which just isn't possible.

Maybe the Loptyr cult has some effective weight loss programs? I mean, there has to be some reason why they could have grown so big. Although that might put their persecution in a different light... (you know, besides the "worshiping an evil dragon" thing).

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Life itself leads to Berwick. The chosen ones by God are led to it throughout their lives. We are the master race. We are the master race... praise Kaga...

...This may have crossed over a line form being your favorite game to obsession somewhere...

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Jeremie Belpois, from Code Lyoko! I'm sure of it. The guy's an absolute unit, he could fight off all those foxes.

Don't know who the guy was, so I didn't add him. Looking back, I think I blanked on foxes to add, so it ended up having several unrelated characters participate. Despite that, I think the sheer wackiness and mental pictures that arouse from the game more than make up for that:

Spoiler

unknown.png?width=428&height=670unknown.pngunknown.png

unknown.png

Spoiler

For the record, Wang refers to Lo Wang from Shadow Warrior. And Sami and Spencer are the families cats:

IMG_20190428_143857675_HDR.jpg?width=377

 

 

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Then he killed Holmes, blamed Fox, revived Runan with his superpowers, and flew away from the battlefield. That's canon now.

And then Stupidfox decided to follow Eugen's example and die gloriously in battle, but was too competent.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...aw, they died together! Maybe they lost their glasses, and that's how...

They tried to team up on Stupidfox. Which is ironic considering they're the smartest people in that game.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, I did a number on him. You'll see...

*Hype Intensifies*

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Agreed. I mean, it makes even this guy cool.

v4g81TU.png

Now that's an accomplishment.

I can't tell whether those lines are trying to hard to be cool or if they're actually cool.

I see what you mean by the name making a difference.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Compare that to the closest thing to rescuing that there is in Berwick (I know, I know, sorry), the Guard skill, which Ward and Marcel have. It works like this: if the guarded character is attacked, the enemy enters combat with the guardian instead. However, the guardian suffers some heavy stat losses, and neither of the units can do anything but wait without stopping the skill's effects.

This was unbelievably useful in the last chapter I played, where I had Perceval, flimsy mage, destroy a dangerous ballista in the middle of a horde of enemies, and then had Marcel guard him from everything else. Marcel killed nobody and came closer to death that I'd liked, but that's better than what would've happened if he had his powers doubled - read, chapter over.

Seems like a useful skill that requires some planning to get a use out of. It seems like it could easily backfire if you're not careful, as well.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, there is such a thing as "human body" that exists and there's nothing you can do about that.

I know. I'm just explaining why Echoes got that rating despite having less fanservice than Fates.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Now, my question is: what was Fates's rating?

Fire Emblem Fates: Conquest
 

Platform: Nintendo 3DS
Rating Category: T.png
Content Descriptors: Animated Blood, Fantasy Violence, Suggestive Themes
Other: Online Interactions Not Rated by the ESRB (Nintendo 3DS)
Rating Summary: This is a role-playing game in which players assume the role of a warrior battling evil forces (e.g., soldiers, demons). Battles are depicted from an overhead perspective, with characters moving around a grid while taking turns selecting attack moves from a menu. Attacks are presented in short animated sequences: characters striking each other with swords, lances, axes, and pistols. Cutscenes also depict violent acts: characters stabbing themselves or sacrificing themselves for others (e.g., jumping in the way of an attack). A handful of scenes depict silhouetted splashes of blood or brief mist-like sprays when characters are struck. A handful of female characters are depicted wearing low-cut outfits that reveal large amounts of cleavage; in one cutscene, the camera (from a first-person perspective) zooms-in on a female character's cleavage.
 
Scarily, considering the amount of fanservice and innuendos the game has, it probably would have been rated M a decade ago.
On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Let me guess, that one random shot of the moon that went on for like 5 seconds. For no good reason.

Nah, more the "just use the in-game graphics and animations and position them in a way that makes them look fancy" line of thinking that is strangely prevalent in most strategy games.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, the problem is that, today, it seems most associate "spritework" with the myriads of nostalgia-pandering, NES-styled indie games that are completely hideous. People tend to forget that, between the NES and the Switch, there was such a thing as the SNES, which was capable of being (gasp!) beautiful.

There's also the Castlevania games and King of Fighters, which feature some really impressive spritework as well. And I know that Wario Land: Shake it has over 2000 sprites for Wario alone (although to be fair, they were made by Production I.G., which apparently has a lot of high quality works to their name).

That kind of high-quality spritework isn't forgotten, but there definitely is a lot more work that needs to be put into it than the comparatively simple NES graphics.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahah, good on you! Although, to be fair, that's an orchestrated version of the OST. Still, there isn't that much of a difference between the orchestrated versions and the ingame versions. Here, compare both versions of this one. Heck, I'd say I like the ingame version better, myself!

I think I have to agree with you there. The ingame version does sound better.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, if I wanted to wow you, I'd send you something other than the first talking scene.

Ahem.

Eyw01q2b o "Welp. I'm completely and utterly fasteriskcked. Sorry, horse."

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

It's not just this one, either. There are no conversation backgrounds in this game: every single scene takes place in maps of some kind, and very few of them resort to the "dark screen behind the textboxes" solution.

I see what you mean by them being impressive now.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Not quite, actually. Ward is kinda Eugen, but he trades off most of the sass for a playable status (in fact, he's kinda the second Lord! No such thing as units retreating when dying for the dialogue here, no sir. Ward game-overs you just like Reese). Faye is a myrmidon, and Marcel's not wearing a dress, c'mon.

So Kaga did "Lord with beard" first, Faye is going by Gaiden/SoV promotion rules, and Marcel is wearing a long skirt?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You did nail Clifford, though, that's his character: he used to be this amazing knight, but he fell on hard times and now he's a drunken loser who does mercenary work to pay off his tabs.

IVilFyvjxHxvBTRaNBCpUb9cA5rSWpok9hqkUbSv5VeQ_JMuo_-758b4OGstpXPuSvSm2tea2z48TNcTMDXW_xdHKrKa-iXVpmi2G8srhO_SsjwtHkhamngdHrEEGMuIUe44z1AJ

I had too.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah, I can see that. Maybe he blew them up in frustration after Codha put him in the box.

I can see that being actual canon now. Tom decided that no one should be placed inside of a container, and launched himself to blow them all up. Unfortunately, he was too strong, and they all exploded.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

That was an attempt to annoy you, to be fair. I succeeded! Hahah!

I was suspecting that.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahahahahahah okay that was awesome.

Thank you.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahah, Luke destroyed Yoda. And then Yoda died and this is the last conversation he ever had with anyone.

I can only imagine Obi-Wan laughed very hard.

Laughing out of being reunited with an old friend, or that Yoda died an anticlimactic death?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Your life motto is a meme? Eh, I won't judge.

I had it before I knew of the song. And there's no "you" inside of the saying.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Pretty sure they're both valid variants. I mean, this is something that happened millennia ago. Records weren't exactly precise back then. It's only natural multiple versions of the same quote would surface. Hell, for all we know he just died saying "GUUUUURRRRRGHHHHH" and that's it.

It comes from Shakespeare's play anyway. Caesar probably didn't have a lot to say after being stabbed several times.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gah... why, FE? Why must you be so cruel to everybody?

I could add Kellam and Henry to that list for my current Ironman, but that's only of dead characters. And it wasn't due to unlucky RNG, but me overestimating the defense of the former and the speed of the latter. Donnel also fell in his recruitment chapter because I forgot to look at the enemies hit rate, but at least he lived story-wise, even if he didn't join us.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can see that. He'd probably trade off his entire party in exchange for a shot at Richard.

GvJxyCU3TprvYbVv9KtAMLDckVYTwEHrRmVQUtuZvbUEX5NI6MCYGIqfhSwAX_RE5DaDy3sb8KRo-JSWfNP5tgnPS5D0YuKSIdFH_j0eoBLBWnqh78T3Q8t-VWIs-m59PZnuvHN7djsN2FnZ1ixrQyH1sKl5XZ6v1X-gBCFzuCqnV76YtOG__KQHxyK4l-W-opoinEO2nEPaEoxm0Vyqm79aQCD62gsFSMPIYAkHMUThllP4PwInoBaq27t64byF2Wd-EYgYLURO1eRK

That scene was from a different camera angle then I remembered, and I don't know how to flip individual pictures yet (it flipped the entire thing whenever I tried). Oh well

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You're right, we're getting to know how the player character feels in the hands of a completionist. Just screaming "WHY DO YOU MAKE ME DO ANY OF THE THINGS YOU MAKE ME DOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?!?!?! WHAT IS THE PURPOSE!?"

 Sounds like an idea for the Ludum Dare. Although half of them would probably be pretentious "being the protagonist in fiction would actually suck" deals.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey I didn't say he was trolling, I said he was having fun. Being an asshole...

Good point.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

In the final chapter it turns into War Thunder out of nowhere. Now that'd be awesome.

I have a plan for a joke about this. I'll make it later since I don't want to go through a bout of copy-pasting again.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Not really, he doesn't look much like his mother, either. You'll see when we meet her.

This brings up other implications. None of them good.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ergh... please elaborate, because I don't really get it.

Looking back, it seemed that Holmes had seen Plum's situation before to the point that he didn't take it that seriously. That was still one one of his lowest moments in the entire game, but considering when/how he learned of his fathers, uh, lack of chastity, that may have affected how he looked at those kind of issues. I also have the feeling that there's a lot that happened off-screen that has jaded him to the point that he doesn't find it horrifying anymore.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

To be fair, nothing can be as hilarious as when Eugen decked him in the face.

Good point.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Exactly 1. And he lost it when Eugen punched the bees out of him.

For better or worse. Had Eugen punched two points out of him, it could have resulted in a computer glitch that turned the negative one into 255. Now that would have broken the game in a different way.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Suffice to say, I like to believe Shigen when he says that Vals was tearing up seeing Holmes all grown up. Implies some degree of redeemability for both him and his relationship with Holmes.

Considering that Vals is flawed, and that real life relations between parents and children can be incredibly complex, I also believe Shigen.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, I'm quite sure you'll be satisfied, this time.

*Hype Intensifies*

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Heheh, thanks. I'm pretty proud of it, myself.

You're welcome.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

To be completely honest, knowing his track record, I think he's better off following Lentzie's order. He might screw up and tick off the wrong person. Which, in his case, is everybody in my army, excluding the clerics, but including the unplayable Malledus. REALLY including the unplayable Malledus. He'd be Arkis's worst nightmare.

I meant to say "prevent Arkis from saying anything that would send him to hell". I would post that gif about spelling errors, but that might be a "too soon" situation in light of recent events.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't see how that's supposed to help Lentzie get away. Could you help me understand?

They would be shocked that they killed one of their own men, which another enemy unit could capitalize on and attack them while they are distracted.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, I don't think they wanted to go that far with poor Arkis.

That's one of those twists on a clique I want to see someday. Inste**ad of shutting someone up with a gag, the enemy either threatens to punch the talkative persons jaw off, or they just do so. Somewhat similar to subverting the "bad guy grabs females arm to contain her" by having said bad guy break said arm doing so.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Still, a gag would've been perfect.

I could say the same about a few of characters in this game. Except then people might get the wrong idea of what kind of game TRS is.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, just you wait...

*Hype Intensifies* Combo 3!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

So, yeah. In conclusion, you need to hurry. A lot. And no, you can't sacrifice the loot. You just can't. That loot is worth 10 Arkises put together, plus all the loot from 26A. It's that good.

So while Chapter 26A has bullcrap with the enemies are hidden, 26B requires juggling several things at once and dashing through a map.

This should be an inteeresting update to watch.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Wdstmog8 o

But not to worry. I've got a solid plan.

I forgot that killing edges are black in this game.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Gmhwzw6u o

I know, it's a shame, but there's really no need for more than two or three thief swords. The loot is more important.

So you can't get a dropable item if the enemy is killed with a ranged attack? I'm trying to remember if that was brought up before.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Lchcdk2w o

I'm so happy I got to make a GIF of that before the end of the game.

For some reason, I'm reminded of Kenjutsu training in Sword of the Samurai.

Probably because the Zemsllian is holding his sword properly, and they go down without an issue.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

J2qnfew3 oUf6esd0k oEndgbkax o

I missed this games magic effects. We haven't seen some of them in a while.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
8gwcyfqv o

Very well. Onwards, everybody! We're on a very tight schedule!

That's the thief dagger?

It looks... poorly made (in-universe, I mean). Which makes sense since if the thief didn't have the money to buy a decent weapon.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Dvjfdav5 oOmklr4o9 o

BAD! RUNAN, NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? THIS ISN'T THE TIME TO BE A GOOD COMBAT LORD!

Runan looks like he's doing the mercenary dance while turning his arm into a sword/lance in the first picture, while he gains an extra head and leg and scissor hands in the second picture.

Maybe he's secretly an animorph?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Jesus fuck. 1 HP, everybody. Had Runan gotten strength in that last level, that would've been the end of Arkis right there. And then we would've missed out on a great Eugen scene...

You have the strangest luck.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Dvath00u oRp5wl5gf o

That arrow looks like some kind of specialized arrow that Hawkeye uses in the MCU films.

Drawing arrows was not this games strong point, was it?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

90hvxdqo o

Why is Letena wearing very little for a cleric?

Thinking back, though, this reminds me in a bad way of Plum...

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h oErgh... should we tell him that we can hear him, loud and clear?

Guhpuhme oBah. Let him be. We're all going to die, anyway. He thinks he's got Lentzenheimer fooled, but there's a reason he put us in this room... there is no escape for us.

Copuooez oThat's a shame... but perhaps if we kill enough Razelians, he'll let us go! Let's do this, fellows!

Minion Misadventures!

These are always a joy to see!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h o...we are all going to die here, aren't we.

The fate that all mooks must accept.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Invps2lq o

Deja Vu. The worst kind of Deja vu

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h oDrat! Almost got one!

Copuooez oWhaddaya mean, "almost"?! We're "almost" dead men, too! Which of those "almost" do you want to see the whole way through, huh!?

Ljzkug2h oDamnit, will you shut up and let me concentrate?! I think he's still within my reach...

Copuooez oBetter be, or else I'm gonna--e 

Guhpuhme oCalm down! Let the man aim in peace.

These dialogues are gold.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

A3liakj5 oHow can you know that? We cannot see them anymore...

This raises the question of how the in the world healers now where to use physic in-universe, when they can't see the other person through walls or when they're halfway across the map and all that.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sjl5htjr oFather!!

Q7cix2tv o...I'm... I'm alive? I must have a guardian angel. And I believe I know her name...

Sjl5htjr oLetena... n-never mind that! We'll worry about it later! We need to move! Hurry, this way!

I see that that update was a case of foreshadowing.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Rx79mwxc o...perhaps not all is lost yet. These loud imbeciles might make for a good distraction, when the worst comes to the worst...

Pragmatism for the win!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Muuutk7i o

First blood! Wait, doesn't it look a little like Kate's spitting that arrow...?

Agree. Maybe she pulled back on the bow too hard.

Which reminds me; In Darklands, there's an actual mechanic where if a character has extremely high strength, it's possible for them to break flails and bows because they swung the latter or pulled the string too hard. Granted, it's rare, and the strength they need to be add is no small feat to reach, but it is hilarious that something like that exists in the game.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

X4svuaba oAh, I've no intention of going anywhere. I have a little plan to aid you from here. Tee hee...

In-universe foreshadowing!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h oWhat, that little girl? I think we can handle a girl so small and fragile. It's the others that we need to worry about...

Rx79mwxc oYou don't unders--

Rx79mwxc o...hmm... yes. Yes, you're right. Sorry, I overreacted.

The librarian is letting his fellow morgans walk into the lions den, to be torn apart by the beasts inside. Except Sasha isn't a wild ani-

You know what? That's a distinction without a difference. I hope those morgans didn't want peaceful deaths...

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Where's Arkis going? To Lina? Nah, I wouldn't be surprised if he's planning to run back into the throne room and go "Lord Lentzenheimer, they stole my weapon! What do I do now?". He's dumb enough to try that.

In other words, he's a clueless employee that's going to his supervisor to ask how to handle a situation that he's never encountered before.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Rx79mwxc oOh, goodness... e-everybody's been gravely injured... where do I even start!?

The plight of every healer.

No wonder experienced support players are so snarky and jaded.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Hfd8dw7k oLmuymzgc oMtkhklns o

I'm confused, why would they go after Norton? Lionel was a sitting duck!

The Shadow Warriors decided they needed a tank on their team, and Norton would join them because defeat=Friendship to them. Unfortunately for them, Norton defeat=destroy.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Qdqgemdv o

Oh, shit! It's the Mage with the AoE spell! He hasn't done much of anything yet.

0ibkgenw o

...and, frankly, considering what he achieved the one time he moved, he might as well not have gotten out of bed today. All he accomplished was to give Norton a high critrate! Poor, poor fool!

Considering how dangerous tornadoes can be in real life, that is hilariously pathetic.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Copuooez o...that's IT!?

Guhpuhme oAdmittedly, I was... expecting more.

Copuooez oOh, you useless son of a-- c'mere! I'll kill you myself and use your head as a throwing weapon!

Ljzkug2h oW-Wait! We're still not dead! If we work together, we can still--

Copuooez oYou'll be dead soon, if you get in my way, kid!

Ljzkug2h oA-Argh! Stop him!

Copuooez oNngh! Hands off me, pricks...!

This banter is beautiful, and it's a shame they always have to die.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

G8vxpyfb o

Farewell, Lionel. You were a strong man, but alas...

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHHAH... HAAHAHAHAHAH...! Hahah... ahah... hehehe... oohh.. ohohah... hah... hoo... oh, man... hah... ahh...

...

Not even pretending here, that was literally my reaction. I just began laughing my ass off, just because of how surreal this is. It really is fucking surreal. I know the pros say not to blame the RNG, but... what is this, man? It's like I'm always stuck with the worst-case scenario.

Yeah, honestly, I'd probably do the same.

Better than the "welp!" that I tend to say.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Fiiavr8h o

Poor Norton, man. He just lost a good friend. No wonder he's extra pissed off. Also, that Dakruon choice's gotten way too difficult in the span of two maps, hasn't it? Urk...

Norton's so mad, he turned his swords into a pair of giant scissors.

But seriously there's something extremely cathartic about having the friend/relative/lover/spouse of a dead unit avenge the deceased.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Wxvtl35n o

Not Narcus too, you fucks...

That's... a pretty odd position.

It looks like he's doing some kind of goofy walk.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Geadlmjv o

Become Lee, Narcus. That'll give you a tiny bit more bulk. That's what you need right now.

Lee healeeng (Narcus!)Lee is an image I was not expecting to see.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ehf9xrnd o

It looks like their sword bent at an odd angle. Is it made of plastic or foam or something?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Xtxbcatf o

Especially when the sword looks normal here.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...ohh, now you're just taking the piss... must... resist... urge... to punch screen... think of something nice...

Quote
G6bwpi5h oC5fzpi5l o
 
Xntledym o

...ah, much better, yes.

This came back, and I believe it was mentioned earlier.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

And he gets healed some more! Lee is this close to level 30. Let's hope he ends(?) his leveling career on a good note.

I can understand the reluctance to use the word "end" in any game with permadeath.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I was thinking the best two candidates for this are Tom and Garo. The idea of a speed tank is just too good to ignore, but on the other hand, Garo is my best combat unit that's held back by his bad movement. I'll let you guys decide. You've got until the route split. In the meantime, this sucker's going in the convoy. Feel free to propose somebody else, too, if you think there's a better option. No, Pengaius, Arkis is not a better option.

I'll place my vote now and say Garo. Tom already has some solid movement options because of his skills, but Garo doesn't.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
7xommc8a o

Well, whatever. Rishel does a magical cape flip, and...

It looks like Rishel is waving good-bye to someone off screen.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h oA-Ah! They're here!

Guhpuhme oMay the Lord save us all... we're done for!

Copuooez oI don't want to die! Gaaaaahhh! M-My weapon, give me back my weapon! I don't want to die unarmed and helpless like a rat!

Ljzkug2h oOh, who cares-- here it is! Go ahead and shoot me in the back of the head! It doesn't matter anymore!

Guhpuhme oO Gerxel... wait for me, your loyal servant, before the gates of Purgatory...!

Rx79mwxc o...this is it. Hang back, don't draw attention to yourself... let them bear the brunt of the enemy's anger...

And here's the sad part of Minion Misadventures.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h oGwah! Mother... I hope... Lord Lentzenheimer won't go after you... now that I've fallen...!

And you just had to rub salt in that wound, didn't you?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ljzkug2h o...thank you. It was truly tiresome to hear those idiots' incessant bickering.

Well, that's one way to look at death.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

We're done for now. Alas... I also have to kill off Letena to ensure she doesn't break Kreiss's heart, so...

xnVjg9.gif

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nc8hplwt oDon't fight! Just let them kill you! Don't you get it yet!? You were never supposed to win!

 Eyw01q2b o...

Lentz actually took advantage of his terrible tactical ability to do something.

And he still failed.

Really, though, I kinda like this line and change of events.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Copuooez oG-Gwaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuurgh! Unnh... You're... the girl he was so scared of... now I get it... urk!

Thou may have been the meanest minion of the banter, but alas, you did not deserve this fate.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

3oo9o7zk o

Nice! Never would say no to a bow that fires four times. Even if it weighs a ton and a half.

AKA how Brave weapons should be balanced.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...what am I looking at!? Where do I even start? Lina is a unit that has a M O V E M E N T   G R O W T H! As high as Leonie's! And she's a Cavalier, to boot! That makes her awesome, right? No! No, it doesn't, because she has a base strength of 3 on a 10% growth, a base defense of 2 (that's lower than Lee's right now), a base mastery of TWO! She can't use anything! She's completely useless! Lina's the best argument for anybody who wants to prove that horses and movement aren't the only things a unit needs to be good. You know all those people who say "horse = top tier"? Well, show them this! This is literally as horse as it gets! She's got a higher move base than normal, and a huge growth for it! And she's completely worthless, much like her worthless boyfriend!

She gains Canto, Vantage and Adept, but none of that matters because she's got a horrible strength growth and a horrible mastery. She can't fight worth beans. You know, at least the likes of Miranda, Ewan and Nino use magic, which, no matter how bad you are, will always deal at least SOME damage to cannon-fodder enemies! What is this bitch going to do, exactly? Nothing, that's what. She's there to re-recruit Arkis so they can both bond over their uselessness at the bench. Full stop. A completely unusable unit, and that's saying something, considering I've managed to make the likes of Matthis, Wade and Tom usable.

In other words, there exists a statistically worse joke unit than Evil Goatee man.

I am amazed. Although considering their mutual sulkiness, I can see why sh'es Arkis's betrothed.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gl41diog o

Hey, where do you think you're going? Come back, man! Sasha wants to play with you!

Did this turn into a horror game? For the Librarian?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Stvhejec o

...blistering barnacles, what the heck is that?! Golgotha is a godly Swordmaster with an awesome weapon that moves. He also has Astra, which I believe I've mentioned in the past. If it triggers, he'll throw no less than five swings at his unfortunate opponent. Not something you want to be on the receiving end of.

I see what you mean by him being relevant last time. That is one heck of a bodyguard.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Li3azkme o

Very simple. Golgotha's a really mysterious character.

And a merc only in it for the money. No wonder Lentz hired him.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sdejd6uf o

Did he give Norton the finger, or is he making a "come-at-me!" gesture?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
4jabgbrc oIudoexnw o

Norton best swordsman in Lieberia confirmed.

He may not have the speediest sword arm, be he has the strength to make up for it.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
Obypsanq o
 
X60isllr o
 
Rtmrcem9 o

HYPE INTENSIFIES!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
95u75pgc o1w15mkkn o

Lentzenheimer, you've been a thorn in everybody's side for too long. It's time for some old-fashioned revenge, courtesy of the woman you attempted to kill AND have killed!

This can't get any better. Death by poetic justice.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

C3m74xtr o

Hahahahaha Brutal!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gsi5lpgo o

KA-BOOM! It's all over. This time, it's really over.

The right kind of anticlimax.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

4mpgqkzm o

This keeps getting better and better.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Tza0nwom oHe knew that my sword is meant for those who would threaten me and my friends, not for killing the innocent. And while you're far from innocent, worm, you're also no longer a threat. That's why I lowered my sword.

Tza0nwom oNow do us all a favor and crawl in a hole somewhere to die.

F4aswdy8 o ...Jesus fuck! She may be awful, but she has a way with words! She just murdered him without murdering him!

And you took the words out of my mouth. Except for the Jesus and cursing part.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Fitting music for a backstabbing.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
7ssiuhca o

The insane manchild is killed for the third, and final, time.

And now he has blood from the mouth. He is dead, dead, and dead!

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Man... I usually do this with Vega to get the event Julia has in the other route, but goodness gracious, that was so awesome. Way better than Vega's version! Vega just throws a petty insult at Lentzie and grabs the sword. Here, Lentzenheimer is so scared shitless, he hands over the sword before trying to stab Julia with a dagger, I assume. I like to think that she murders him with his own sword. Just adding to the poetic justice even more. Old Dholm must be laughing to tears down in hell.

Guess this is the reward for using the weaker unit.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Look at that thing. It's not even locked to her! Imagine Sasha soaring through the skies with this beauty... oh, boy. Now there's an idea.

Carrying on Lentz's legacy, except in a way that doesn't want to give her a nasty death.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Rx79mwxc o...yes! Yes, this is the one! The secret passage...! Why did the ancient Razelians even put a secret passage in a cell? Maybe this wasn't always one...

Ever play the Elder Scrolls, Librarian?

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

38ti9te7 oAhah! I found you! You lose~!

Rx79mwxc oGah! What am I doing, wasting time like this!? Run!

Yep. This is a horror game for him.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wf2nqn5y oKsqzjmbe o8ppp8bzp o

No joke; My first thought when I saw this was "why is Arkis wearing a skirt?"

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:
T9yyevts o

...er...

Well, considering how long he's been benched, he get's an A for effort.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sooo yeah. That's been Arkis. Can't say I didn't try.

Well, you deserve a hand for trying. Oh look! Here's one that someone's not using anymore...

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, well. In any case! Whoa, what a rollercoaster! This map has had it all. Plans going well, luck being awful, drama, comedy, death, unhealthy amounts of gore... what an update! I personally loved making it. Please tell me if I went a little overboard with the character dialogue. It was just too much fun, I couldn't contain myself! And with that, I leave you. Farewell, and we shall see each other again soon! Adios, amigos!

The amount of character dialogue was fine, and it's always enjoyable! That said, I can see why it's uncommon. It's possible to have it be too much of a good thing if it happened every other update.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Qzgpos9m oThis truly is hell. No doubt about it. Where even is Mother?

I could say how Hell is actually a horrifying place and I wouldn't wish my worst (real life) enemy there, but that's a discussion for elsewhere.

On 6/13/2019 at 6:23 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Rmyu7cpq o...where did I go wrong... when did I let my family turn into such a mess...

      8v5hn3pn o      If you think your fate was bad, wait until I tell you about mine, ma'am.

Zpnioeae oAt least you still had a family. I barely even had myself when I died!

Rmyu7cpq o...

I only have one small, inty-bity, teenie-tiny little question:

Spoiler

WHERE IN HELL IS THE SLAVER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

...Man, that was a long update. took me 5 hours to write, and I think I'm a little sleep deprived from yesterday, so that explains any weirdness. Still, I have fun making these, and look forward to the next update.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

WHERE IN HELL IS THE SLAVER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Ever hear the legend that inspired the Jack O'Lantern? It was of a man named Jack who had personally slighted the Devil, so hell would not take him, but who was far too wicked for heaven. His spirit was condemned to wander the Earth, with nothing but a Lantern as guidance. Long story short, I think Slaver copped a similar deal. Never to truly pass on to the afterlife. After all, if one legend gives the devil standards....
 

16 hours ago, Hawkwing said:
On 6/11/2019 at 2:35 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

 

Ah, copyright laws and fair use. Concepts that, for better and worse, have extremely broad definitions.

I really do wonder if a revision of them would be worth the trouble, or if it would end up doing more harm than good.


I paid a bit of attention to copyright law. There's a surprising amount of stuff that's fell into the public domain either by sheer age (Dracula, fairly recently Tarzan), lack of renewal (the Charles Biro version of Daredevil, completely unrelated to Marvel's one, who wore a suit the was split down the middle Red & Blue with a spike belt. This character was mute, and was raised by "Australian pygmies" (which is weird, because while there was a race of pygmy in Australia, they were, according to records wiped out when the group collectively referred to as Indigineous Australians arrived... quite long ago) after his parents were killed by his uncle for their fortune on a trip to a mine they owned. As one may expect of a character in such a position, he fought using boomerangs, and his archnemesis was the Claw, who could best be described as an intelligent Kaiju.

 

 

17 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

...I think I have a fear of sleep-walking now.

Personally I'm more worried about sleep paralysis. The hallucinations it brings can be horrific.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Part 57 - Leif no more!

So I was reading Hawkwing's reply, and it occured to me that it might be fun to make a Hunger Games of the thread. So let's have it, then. I recommend you read it, you'll find it's quite hilarious.

Spoiler
Wrmmtg9j o

Behold, the contestants! Team 1 is me, me and Bismarck because why not. Team 2 is the readers. I had to fit every single reader except for Hawky and Butterman into a single Morgan. Please take no offense that you weren't all included: I'm just hoping something silly happens like Butterman killing Arkis or Hawky dying first. Team 3 is the invincible badasses. I root for them or Eugen, personally. Team 4 is Wellt. Team 5 is despicable people (didn't put the slaver because he was so despicable, he glitched out and disappeared from existance). Team 6 is the Cavaliers. Team 7 is Elibe, with the best people from Elibe. Team 8 is fucking horrible and I don't want to talk about it. Team 9 doesn't have a reason to exist. Team 10 is very generic. Team 11 is Runan and Eugen. Eugen appears twice because he's Eugen. Then there's team 12, which is evil people. Not to be confused with the despicable people.

Let the games begin!

Ianzbbxb o

For starters, E--

...oh, you can't be serious. The first casualty is NORTON?! Norton of all people! Why the fuck not. Well, this is clearly non-canon if Norton dies so easily!

Then again, it is Eugen...

Oh, and he's the only one that dies in the Bloodbath. Some bloodbath it turned out to be.

Rcj0bbzb o

There's very witty historical commentary that can be done here, but I won't try it.

Hkox0mdj o

This is the part where I started to laugh my ass off.

Zqr8rkvb o

Tom!? Tom dies next!? And to Marcus, FE6's Eugen! What the heck is going on!?

Also, what the hell was I doing chasing Mel? C'mon, me, you know better than that, she's to be married!

Xslasmqz o

For some reason, Maerchen was suicidal throughout the whole thing. All he ever did was ask people to kill him. But nobody wanted to bother. Lentzenheimer probably enjoyed seeing him squirm. I mean, try to watch while keeping the blood from getting into his one eye. Or maybe he just couldn't kill him with his one arm.

Bykwgwpp o

This is just here because Indy's name works hilariously well.

Ftinmj6l o

Hah! Well, look how the tables have turned! Who's gay for Eugen now, huh? Bet Eugen's on top, too.

Khfctvat o

Then--

...

...you've got to be kidding-- I GOT KILLED BY THE BRILLIANT DUMBASS! THE BRILLIANT DUMBASS OF ALL PEOPLE! AND ALONGSIDE HOLMES, AGAIN, OF ALL PEOPLE! C'MON! WHAT IS THIS?!

Ynwnqeji o

Well, there go the completely unrelated characters that I added for no reason at all. They probably insulted the King, and Dougy was having none of that.

F3oyjeuz o

No comment.

Awgdhr1n o

Awwww they're probably for Mel!

Tuwtvgyw o

Aha! The two badasses still alive murder that piece of crap. Thanks, guys. Truly appreciate the avengement.

Syatw1yo o

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! This. This is the most perfect picture in the entire thing. Like, this is random, right? It could not have been any more perfect! I didn't edit anything, in fact, I'll give you the code later in case you want to check out the entire thing in detail!

Ts3ojacs o

Insert historical commentary here.

Eyvpvteq o

Well, of course. Guen, you're too irresponsible. Why do you go around wearing a crown of thorns? This is what happens, see?

Yp79yma4 o

From one Jeigan to the other. Honor of the old men.

Oynccpof o

Then Maerchen begs literally every reader of the thread to kill him, but nobody cares, so he's sad.

Zudprson o

Holy shit!

That's... a turn of events I wasn't expecting. Perhaps Mel's the real threat we should be fearing?

6jwk9ha9 o

...

...ah... sorry, dozed off there. What's happening?

...

...GWAT!?

I randomly died. All I did in the entire thing was chase after Mel for no reason, get spooked by a Horseman, and then die of... something. Nice. Fucking beautiful. Even this old-as-balls, randomly-generated battle royale simulator doesn't pull any punches!

Znviek6n o

Of course, and then Runan betrays me. Damn you, Gotoh! Ruining everything as usual!

8xvmoat2 o

Garo kills one of the Eugens. This is completely out of character, and I elect to consider that this Eugen was an evil clone of Eugen, hence why Garo killed him.

Zrltoh91 o

Dude-- Hawkwing, what the hell!? Why!? Did Butterman pay you to do this!? I'll skin you aliv-- never mind I'm dead, but somebody will kill you in my stead, you'll see!

Ihrvdz4z o

...wh... why? The Roger dies of The Thirst, and Bismarck dies to Butterman. This is clearly the worst timeline.

Q0cfviyd o

Lionel, too, betrays me, and then literally all the readers of the thread pass out on a pile.

D6zetivd o

Jesus Christ on a bike, Mel! Slow down! I get that your boyfriend died after doing... basically nothing at all the entire time, but you don't need to go apeshit and start killing everyone!

Raof9qjg o

Poor Brigadier was never a very fortunate man.

S4wpymxw o

Pffffwahahahahah... I swear, I had so much fun with this. It's just, it could've been a completely unremarkable hodgepodge, but instead, things were either perfectly fitting or horribly wrong. No in-betweens. My "great" luck strikes again! Now, go and win, Eugen. I believe in you!

Qtmgq16f o

Goodness gracious. Even if she doesn't win, I'm pretty sure Mel's going to have the biggest kill count. Is this what she's been up to since she left after The Roger's untimely death?

Gjpovogv o

Well, you know what? At least this little asshole died a death as pathetic as mine. Small victories.

Hmve1pjc o

...and then Maerchen died in exactly the same way. Man, that pit's the real MVP of the game.

Skqwzshr o

Oh, what?! No! It started so well, but now it's derailing into an absolute trainwreck! Everyone's dying randomly!

R7pym1vh o

...oh, you... this is... what!? I mean, I'm not worried, Eugen has the power of inmortality and giving no fucks, but he's still disqualified! Who'll win now? Indiana Jones?

Athryakz o

HAWKWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! STOP KILLING EVERYONE I LIKE AND KILL ARKIS!

Qminybtv o

I--

...

OH, NOW THIS IS FUCKING PERSONAL. ARKIS, I'LL SEE YOU DEAD, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!

U2zklpah o

WHAT!? WHAT?!?!? NO, NO, NO! ARKIS IS WELL ON HIS WAY TO WIN! LOT DIES BECAUSE BUTTERMAN FALLS ON HIM?! HOW HEAVY CAN A STICK OF BUTTER POSSIBLY BE?! LOT WAS LITERALLY, NOT NEARLY OR FIGURATIVELY, LITERALLY INVINCIBLE ALL OF FE6! WHAT HAPPENED!? DID HE FEEL PITY FOR THE OTHERS AND DECIDED TO DIE TO GIVE THEM A FIGHTING CHANCE?!!

Fwmnzzqh o

Sure, kill him as well. You kill Indy and Esther, but then fail to beat Arkis? You disappoint me, Hawky.

Yzvjejle o

All the readers commit mass suicide.

That's a sentence I said. Huh.

Evkofeft o

Ah, Runan's still here! With Kreiss's unbelievable death, it's Runan, a mook, the friggin' Horseman and Arkis. Arkis...

C'mon, Runan! I believe in you! You can--

Iibth6h0 o

...mook?

Crwiviy6 o

...

You know it's a sad day when I root for the Horseman.

5dic1fb4 o

...

M12jpgyg o

...

So... Everything was leading to this... Of course... Right...

Arkis... Arkis...

 

 

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!

I WON'T ACCEPT... I CAN'T ACCEPT... THIS IS NO GAME!

RNG...! THE RNG IS EVERYTHING! RNG IS ABSOLUTE!

YOU'D LET TRANSPARENT MECHANICS SOIL YOUR GAME DESIGNS?

...

A-ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGHHH...!

...

This is the last time I let myself fall for the RNGoddess's tricks. Rigged, that was rigged! It was fucking rigged! The RNGoddess is out to get me! You, Hawkwing... you're the one who inspired me to do this! You led me into this mess! It's all your fault! You... you're Butterman! That's right! You're Butterman's secret identity, you led me to this disaster, and now you're probably laughing!

But I'll have the last laugh! Arkis will die, and I'll see to it that his is a slow and painful demise!

N...Nnnnnnnnnnnngggghhhhhhhh...!

Code: IzniDm3R

I respond:

Spoiler
On 6/14/2019 at 12:32 AM, Tryhard said:

This chapter was one of the biggest pains outside of 34. I could never get the Swift Potion from here in my attempts.

you win some, you lose some

Damnit all, and the worst part is, I didn't even lose because of faulty plans, I lost because RNG.

I'm not the most positive about the game in general, but I do think the latest showing did make it look significantly better. I'm still not a fan of the art style or anything because it's a little rough.

Well, if nothing else, now I've a protagonist that truly piques my interest. Before, I liked Edelgard and Dimitri equally, but "like" really only meant "eh, might be okay I guess" for both. Now I can safely say I'll pick Dimitri if I get the game, because his old version is so ridiculously amazing. Seriously, he wears a blue version of Hardin's cape. Anything Hardin is automatically good in my book.

 

On 6/14/2019 at 1:52 AM, BrightBow said:

Runan: Die, you bastard!
Lina: No, Lord Runan! This is not a Shadow Knight! It's Arkis!
Runan: Oh, I see.
Runan: Die, Arkis!

Canon.

Kind of a shame he is still alive, though. Especially considering those who died in his stead. At this rate Lina may have to take on Gwenchaos.

Oh, not Lina. I'd sooner cancel the LP. Or use Arkis, so he inevitably dies.

 

On 6/14/2019 at 5:09 AM, Pengaius said:

I do love the way that Arkis, who is completely new to the #shadowlancerlife is only slightly worse than the fully trained soldiers, and is not only generally less experienced in combat (level difference of 6) but spent most of that time as a horseback fighter, yet still he manages to be faster than them, tldr: shadow lancers suck

10/10 the punchline.

Good thing poorly levelled under-trained Arkis is still strong enough to withstand heavily invested Runan adept procs

More like the Thief's Dagger is a bad weapon.

I may have bribed a few soldiers into making sure Arkis wouldn't die

You bribed the Royal Historian of Wellt? Were you the one who tipped him off about the secret passage?

Lionel, more like Dienel

Damn you!

Well I'd suggest...

aww... I was going to suggest Lee for farther healing range, sheesh

The Paces a-Hundred Yet Still I Hear exists.

👌YEETena👌

Urk!

Unmounted Arkis, given practically no exp

It's a Thief. A Thief. And he still got 2-shot. Also, what butter are you on? He's at least level 6!

I mean you could have set up a choke point to give him more than one kill

Yeah, but no.

Well, Lionel's spot just opened up, just sayin

Ah, not to worry. I had no space for Esther last time, but now that won't be a problem any more.

 

On 6/14/2019 at 6:46 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Yeah, I'll admit, way back when Luigi's Mansion 3 was announced I played through the first two in preparation. Between that, Banjo&Kazooie in smash ultimate, Link's Awakening remake (my personal favourite 2D Zelda), Breath of the Wild's sequel, and the new design on Dmitri, I'm pretty happy with E3.

All right, that's good.

Man, seems like for an awful lot of people "the new design on Dimitri" was the main highlight of the new 3H trailer, eh?

Can't say I'm any different. I will kill every last one of them, my man. Every last one of those generic schoolkids.

Also of note is that it ends in UNT. Not just NT.

Right, it was even more perfect than I thought.

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQak5NkpM38KXz6BuzZtOi


Come now, don't ignore my version.

Yeah, but I'm not counting my chickens before they hatch. Besides, I needed the new user name. Mad Manakete was a bit generic.

Okay then. Although, I don't believe it was so generic. If it was the name of a FE final boss, sure, but it was the name of a FE fan. Big difference.

He moved out quite a while back. Not my problem anymore.
Ah, I see.

A bizarre one yet. A facebook troll that used to frequent a page I visited went by the name of Boss Hogg. That was perhaps his only post that didn't involve his genitals. I believe with Holmes similar sentiments, I have deduced Hogg's true identity after these 8 long years. It was Kaga.
Ahh...

Kaga did it first then. Not sure what, but, something.

Careful. That's the type of talk that got VICETOLUCT banned.

Who?

Lemme look him up...

Quote

I think that the biggest fantasy race we need in Fire Emblem is Jews, that way we can kill tons of jews in Fire Emblem because Jewish pigs are shit!

That was an experience.

I've got to say, though, you got a little carried away there. Like, c'mon. Comparing me to that? This dude was being an effortless troll, whereas I put thought behind my crackpot Berwick cultist statements. I spend full minutes writing paragraphs of unrelated information, and when you least expect it, I assault your braincells with pro-Kaga propaganda! Before long, my far-reaching plan to infuse Berwick into the minds of all shall be realized! All shall play Berwick! ALL HAIL KAGA! ALL HAIL EUGEN! ALL HAIL BERWICK! Mmmhmm, hahahahahah, AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

...please don't ban meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

-Runan smile/split personality
- Roger the knight and The Roger the Paladin are the same guy
-Holmes is mentally handicapped
-Maerchen is neutred
-Slaver Hate
-Maruj Plane
-Why is Zeiss on the prep screen
-Badass Matthis
- Tom's a Dodge-Tank
- Song parodies
- Lee puns
- Arkis accidentally insults people
-edgy shop-keep
-Footballman
-Sp00ky axemen (well that was last LP)
-paces a hundred yet I cure
-Sasha's a monster

Holy shit. Bwahahahahahah. Amazing! And you even forgot some. Where's General Lawrence?

SkillfulLee.

Hah!

Wally's at therapy. He's seen things that he couldn't handle.

Doubt Sasha would allow him to just leave to have therapy. He's more likely fighting against the chains.

So that healer actually went to the effort of healing Arkis? What the hell?
He was desperate.

*Leen

Gwahahahahaahahahah, okay, amazing.

Three if you count 26a. My God. Mirror factory incident confirmed.

Urgh... why... why me?

At least this death was intentional.

I don't know if that makes it better or worse.

Well, we have the worst cav of all time. Even Fiona can't compete.

Hah! At least she has a strength growth!

No one tanks like Norton,
No one shanks like Norton,
No one decimates enemy ranks like Norton.

Mm hmm mm... what a badass, Norton.

Pengaius must have loved this chapter for the Arkis relevance.

You mean how Arkis showed his dumbest side yet, somehow managing to one-up himself?

Post Norton, Lentzenheimer isn't seeing much at all.

O O F

Sorry Zeig. You just got one upped. That shopkeep must be upset too.

The shopkeep can go finger himself. Zieg's still cool, but yeah, Julia's got him beat.

Don't be so sad Murderprincess. There'll be other victims.

Oh, will there ever be.

Surprised we don't have a low percent crit help group here.

I tried asking them to allow me to record one of their sessions, but they said something along the lines of "we have nothing to say to you you killed us" and hung up.

Maybe I reached the wrong number.

 

On 6/14/2019 at 8:14 AM, eclipse said:

Lionel for Arkis.  Somehow, I feel like you got the short end of the stick.

"Somehow"? You "feel"?

 

On 6/15/2019 at 10:19 PM, Hawkwing said:

It seems that Nintendo is combining the best of 1 and 2. I realy need to get around to buying a switch. There are already good games on there, even more are coming.

Go ahead. I bought it a year ago, and I already have a pretty hefty library for what my console libraries usually look like. And it'll only get bigger.

Claude is a Fire Emblem lord with a beard, so that's a win in my books.

It'd be one in mine as well, but his beard is so pathetic, I just can't accept it as a win.

Dmitri went from the least interesting guy to the most, and I could see Edelgard supposedly having two routes.

I agree with this.

I didn't really have time this week to look in detail at the Direct, but from the little I've seen... Yeah, I'm annoyed that they kept Echoes clipping issues, since that was my biggest criticism towards the game graphically.

I constantly have to remind myself that IS had 4-5 years to work with the engine they used for the 3DS games, so Echoes looked and moved great for a reason. Meanwhile, Three Houses is their first game on the Switch, and I know Awakening played it safe (maybe a little too safe) animation and graphics wise, so I'm not surprised that the game isn't amazing graphically

I suppose I can understand that, but still. Quite the letdown, graphically.

That said, while I know that the graphics won't impact my enjoyment of the gameplay at all, this is really the first time where the animations and look of the game actually bother me at points. Just, the odd small details irk me, and I can see them building up over time. I know the Switch isn't a powerhouse, but the game looks like it could pass for Playstation 2 game at points, in a bad way.

Yeah, this is pretty much my opinion.

Friendly reminder that Berwick Saga is a Playstation 2 game.

Once again, I remember what a character did while forgetting the names of locations.

As usual.

I'm glad to hear that he'll come back.

Yep.

Yeah, you did. I'm still missing the days back when the worst we could say about Holmes was that he was a little rude. Although from a certain point of view, you could have been talking about gameplay performance back there, where Holmes actually does have some credit for being the "better protagonist".

Yeah, no denying that he's better than Runan as a unit. He's a great Archer, only he's insufferable.

Maybe the Loptyr cult has some effective weight loss programs? I mean, there has to be some reason why they could have grown so big. Although that might put their persecution in a different light... (you know, besides the "worshiping an evil dragon" thing).

Loptous did nothing wrong?

...This may have crossed over a line form being your favorite game to obsession somewhere...

Nonsense! I am perfectly sane! Here's a picture of me saving a kitty falling from a tree. No insane person would save a kitty falling from a tree, right? Well, I have, and here is the proof:

Ltfyndlj o

See? Sane.

Don't know who the guy was, so I didn't add him.

Oh, you've got no childhood, then. Remember when I said I was never a movie or show kid? Well, that one show is my entire childhood. Code Lyoko, man. That shit was the shit back in my day. I understand it wasn't such a hit in the States, but here in Spain, it's my entire generation's childhood. I'm currently in the middle of rewatching it after so many years, and let me tell you, maybe it's just the nostalgia, but it manages to be good in spite of a thousand flaws that it has. Kinda like Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Or Fire Emblem. Or... me! Fascinating. It appears my whole life has lead to one, singular realization: Berwick Saga. Are you playing Berwick Saga yet?

Looking back, I think I blanked on foxes to add, so it ended up having several unrelated characters participate. Despite that, I think the sheer wackiness and mental pictures that arouse from the game more than make up for that:

  Reveal hidden contents

unknown.png?width=428&height=670unknown.pngunknown.png

unknown.png

  Reveal hidden contents

For the record, Wang refers to Lo Wang from Shadow Warrior. And Sami and Spencer are the families cats:

IMG_20190428_143857675_HDR.jpg?width=377

 

I need to do one of these. In fact, I will do one of these right now!

...well, I tried, but then I tried to edit the cast size and it just erased all my progress. 20 min progress, I might add. Well.

Let's go again!

*And then Arkis won*

...remind me that I must now hate you for life.

And then Stupidfox decided to follow Eugen's example and die gloriously in battle, but was too competent.

Hwahahahahahahaha, nobody dies quite like Eugen.

They tried to team up on Stupidfox. Which is ironic considering they're the smartest people in that game.

Poor them.

*Hype Intensifies*

Woohoo! I won!

I can't tell whether those lines are trying to hard to be cool or if they're actually cool.

I see what you mean by the name making a difference.

The lines weren't what I intended you to focus on. It was the edgy-ass haircut covering one eye. Also, the fact that he's literally pink.

Seems like a useful skill that requires some planning to get a use out of. It seems like it could easily backfire if you're not careful, as well.

That's exactly what it is.

I know. I'm just explaining why Echoes got that rating despite having less fanservice than Fates.

Yeah, I just wanted to complain because I love complaining.

Fire Emblem Fates: Conquest
 

Platform: Nintendo 3DS
Rating Category: T.png
Content Descriptors: Animated Blood, Fantasy Violence, Suggestive Themes
Other: Online Interactions Not Rated by the ESRB (Nintendo 3DS)
Rating Summary: This is a role-playing game in which players assume the role of a warrior battling evil forces (e.g., soldiers, demons). Battles are depicted from an overhead perspective, with characters moving around a grid while taking turns selecting attack moves from a menu. Attacks are presented in short animated sequences: characters striking each other with swords, lances, axes, and pistols. Cutscenes also depict violent acts: characters stabbing themselves or sacrificing themselves for others (e.g., jumping in the way of an attack). A handful of scenes depict silhouetted splashes of blood or brief mist-like sprays when characters are struck. A handful of female characters are depicted wearing low-cut outfits that reveal large amounts of cleavage; in one cutscene, the camera (from a first-person perspective) zooms-in on a female character's cleavage.
 
Scarily, considering the amount of fanservice and innuendos the game has, it probably would have been rated M a decade ago.
Jeez...

Nah, more the "just use the in-game graphics and animations and position them in a way that makes them look fancy" line of thinking that is strangely prevalent in most strategy games.

Ah, I understand. Well, I like it, but to each their own.

There's also the Castlevania games and King of Fighters, which feature some really impressive spritework as well. And I know that Wario Land: Shake it has over 2000 sprites for Wario alone (although to be fair, they were made by Production I.G., which apparently has a lot of high quality works to their name).

That kind of high-quality spritework isn't forgotten, but there definitely is a lot more work that needs to be put into it than the comparatively simple NES graphics.

It's not forgotten, but there's so much crap out there, it's hard to find the real gems.

I think I have to agree with you there. The ingame version does sound better.

I like most ingame versions better, myself. You should check out the ingame playlist, now that I've sent it to you. It's horrendously hard to find.

Eyw01q2b o "Welp. I'm completely and utterly fasteriskcked. Sorry, horse."

Hahahahah, oh, you spared no time before you stole that expression, eh?

I see what you mean by them being impressive now.

Right? Ahah...

So Kaga did "Lord with beard" first, Faye is going by Gaiden/SoV promotion rules, and Marcel is wearing a long skirt?

No, Faye is just a plain Myrmidon who promotes to Swordmaster. Also, no, Marcel isn't wearing a skirt, give up.

IVilFyvjxHxvBTRaNBCpUb9cA5rSWpok9hqkUbSv5VeQ_JMuo_-758b4OGstpXPuSvSm2tea2z48TNcTMDXW_xdHKrKa-iXVpmi2G8srhO_SsjwtHkhamngdHrEEGMuIUe44z1AJ

...

I have to say. This came to my mind. I was praying it wasn't what you were getting at. Clearly my prayers went unanswered. Is it because of all the times I've stated that I don't believe in God...?

I had too.

Why, you...!

By the way I love how the picture is called literally "Clifford joke.png"

I can see that being actual canon now. Tom decided that no one should be placed inside of a container, and launched himself to blow them all up. Unfortunately, he was too strong, and they all exploded.

He had good intentions.

I was suspecting that.

Ah, don't try to save face now.

Thank you.

Laughing out of being reunited with an old friend, or that Yoda died an anticlimactic death?

Knowing Obi? Probably both, but more the latter than the former.

I had it before I knew of the song. And there's no "you" inside of the saying.

I guess so, but still.

It comes from Shakespeare's play anyway. Caesar probably didn't have a lot to say after being stabbed several times.

Like I said, "GUUUUUUUURGHHHHH".

I could add Kellam and Henry to that list for my current Ironman, but that's only of dead characters. And it wasn't due to unlucky RNG, but me overestimating the defense of the former and the speed of the latter. Donnel also fell in his recruitment chapter because I forgot to look at the enemies hit rate, but at least he lived story-wise, even if he didn't join us.

Fuck you, FE. Seriously.

GvJxyCU3TprvYbVv9KtAMLDckVYTwEHrRmVQUtuZvbUEX5NI6MCYGIqfhSwAX_RE5DaDy3sb8KRo-JSWfNP5tgnPS5D0YuKSIdFH_j0eoBLBWnqh78T3Q8t-VWIs-m59PZnuvHN7djsN2FnZ1ixrQyH1sKl5XZ6v1X-gBCFzuCqnV76YtOG__KQHxyK4l-W-opoinEO2nEPaEoxm0Vyqm79aQCD62gsFSMPIYAkHMUThllP4PwInoBaq27t64byF2Wd-EYgYLURO1eRK

That scene was from a different camera angle then I remembered, and I don't know how to flip individual pictures yet (it flipped the entire thing whenever I tried). Oh well

Ahahah, Avengers memes. I wish they were as self-explanatory as the ones from Star Wars. This one is, of course, but...

 Sounds like an idea for the Ludum Dare. Although half of them would probably be pretentious "being the protagonist in fiction would actually suck" deals.

Most likely, yes.

Good point.

Yeah...

I have a plan for a joke about this. I'll make it later since I don't want to go through a bout of copy-pasting again.

Oki-dokie.

This brings up other implications. None of them good.

Ergh...

Looking back, it seemed that Holmes had seen Plum's situation before to the point that he didn't take it that seriously. That was still one one of his lowest moments in the entire game, but considering when/how he learned of his fathers, uh, lack of chastity, that may have affected how he looked at those kind of issues. I also have the feeling that there's a lot that happened off-screen that has jaded him to the point that he doesn't find it horrifying anymore.

Ah, I see. That sounds... sadly, plausible.

Good point.

Again! I'm on a roll of good points today. Let's have three more, and then I'll have FIVE POINTS!!

For better or worse. Had Eugen punched two points out of him, it could have resulted in a computer glitch that turned the negative one into 255. Now that would have broken the game in a different way.

Jeez, now that's an interesting mental image... not-stupid Holmes!

Considering that Vals is flawed, and that real life relations between parents and children can be incredibly complex, I also believe Shigen.

Indeed.

*Hype Intensifies*

Ahah, as intended.

You're welcome.

I meant to say "prevent Arkis from saying anything that would send him to hell". I would post that gif about spelling errors, but that might be a "too soon" situation in light of recent events.

The important thing is that Arkis is awful.

They would be shocked that they killed one of their own men, which another enemy unit could capitalize on and attack them while they are distracted.

Hmm, okay, but it's still Arkis. I can't imagine Runan being too bothered.

That's one of those twists on a clique I want to see someday. Inste**ad of shutting someone up with a gag, the enemy either threatens to punch the talkative persons jaw off, or they just do so. Somewhat similar to subverting the "bad guy grabs females arm to contain her" by having said bad guy break said arm doing so.

There's the downside that you pretty much cannot use that character any more after that. Losing a jaw is kind of a big deal.

I could say the same about a few of characters in this game. Except then people might get the wrong idea of what kind of game TRS is.

Hwahahahah, oh, my goodness. What "wrong idea"? It's a game that hates the player, like its creator. But not as much as Thracia, I can tell you that much.

*Hype Intensifies* Combo 3!

Ahah, excellent.

So while Chapter 26A has bullcrap with the enemies are hidden, 26B requires juggling several things at once and dashing through a map.

This should be an inteeresting update to watch.

Oh, it was.

I forgot that killing edges are black in this game.

You forget everything, so that's no surprise.

So you can't get a dropable item if the enemy is killed with a ranged attack? I'm trying to remember if that was brought up before.

You can't with Steal, I'm pretty sure, but with Mug it doesn't matter.

For some reason, I'm reminded of Kenjutsu training in Sword of the Samurai.

Probably because the Zemsllian is holding his sword properly, and they go down without an issue.

Zemsllian.

I missed this games magic effects. We haven't seen some of them in a while.

Right.

That's the thief dagger?

It looks... poorly made (in-universe, I mean). Which makes sense since if the thief didn't have the money to buy a decent weapon.

No, actually, that's the Sol sword. Notice it's bright red?

Runan looks like he's doing the mercenary dance while turning his arm into a sword/lance in the first picture, while he gains an extra head and leg and scissor hands in the second picture.

It's a trail, damnit! It signifies fast movement!

Maybe he's secretly an animorph?

Eh... no.

You have the strangest luck.

Refer to the Hunger Games thing. Still mad about that.

That arrow looks like some kind of specialized arrow that Hawkeye uses in the MCU films.

Drawing arrows was not this games strong point, was it?

Noooot quite. If we were to rate the game based solely on its arrow design, it'd get a solid 2/10.

Why is Letena wearing very little for a cleric?

Thinking back, though, this reminds me in a bad way of Plum...

Every cleric has the same sprite.

Minion Misadventures!

These are always a joy to see!

Ah, I'm glad you're glad!

The fate that all mooks must accept.

A shame.

Deja Vu. The worst kind of Deja vu

My thoughts exactly.

These dialogues are gold.

Hahah, thanks.

This raises the question of how the in the world healers now where to use physic in-universe, when they can't see the other person through walls or when they're halfway across the map and all that.

Eeeeee magic snort snort?

I see that that update was a case of foreshadowing.

More or less.

Pragmatism for the win!

That's the Royal Historian of Wellt for ya.

Agree. Maybe she pulled back on the bow too hard.

Imagine if that was an actual mechanic.

Which reminds me; In Darklands, there's an actual mechanic where if a character has extremely high strength, it's possible for them to break flails and bows because they swung the latter or pulled the string too hard. Granted, it's rare, and the strength they need to be add is no small feat to reach, but it is hilarious that something like that exists in the game.

...kinda like this, yeah!

In-universe foreshadowing!

Very heavy-handed foreshadowing, but oh well.

The librarian is letting his fellow morgans walk into the lions den, to be torn apart by the beasts inside. Except Sasha isn't a wild ani-

You know what? That's a distinction without a difference. I hope those morgans didn't want peaceful deaths...

Who doesn't want a peaceful death?

In other words, he's a clueless employee that's going to his supervisor to ask how to handle a situation that he's never encountered before.

Yes, except he's also being blackmailed into working, so I can't imagine Lentzie will do much to help.

The plight of every healer.

No wonder experienced support players are so snarky and jaded.

Long-time TF2 Medic main here. Draw your own conclusions!

The Shadow Warriors decided they needed a tank on their team, and Norton would join them because defeat=Friendship to them. Unfortunately for them, Norton defeat=destroy.

It's Norton, what did you expect?

Considering how dangerous tornadoes can be in real life, that is hilariously pathetic.

Very much so. It'll be a little better in Maruj's hands.

This banter is beautiful, and it's a shame they always have to die.

That's the fate of every mook, as you said.

Farewell, Lionel. You were a strong man, but alas...

Too squishy.

Yeah, honestly, I'd probably do the same.

Better than the "welp!" that I tend to say.

I tend to get kinda mad, actually. But this was just starting to get ridiculous.

Norton's so mad, he turned his swords into a pair of giant scissors.

But seriously there's something extremely cathartic about having the friend/relative/lover/spouse of a dead unit avenge the deceased.

And then he took Lentzenheimer's other eye for it! Kinda. I wanted to imply that Norton just barely missed the eye so that, you know, it made sense that he was still up and about to get disarmed by Julia.

That's... a pretty odd position.

It looks like he's doing some kind of goofy walk.

It makes more sense when he's armed. He holds his sword behind his back with a reverse grip.

Lee healeeng (Narcus!)Lee is an image I was not expecting to see.

Same.

It looks like their sword bent at an odd angle. Is it made of plastic or foam or something?

Especially when the sword looks normal here.

It's probably just you.

This came back, and I believe it was mentioned earlier.

I mean, this moment is mentioned in nearly every update.

I can understand the reluctance to use the word "end" in any game with permadeath.

Argh... That wasn't what I meant! He's going to get an occult book, so it's not quite the end of his leveling career! You didn't have to jinx it again! It was not necessary!

I'll place my vote now and say Garo. Tom already has some solid movement options because of his skills, but Garo doesn't.

Actually, they both have the same movement. 4 is Garo's base, and with his skills, Tom also reaches 4.

It looks like Rishel is waving good-bye to someone off screen.

Hah! Kinda does.

And here's the sad part of Minion Misadventures.

An inevitable part, sadly.

And you just had to rub salt in that wound, didn't you?

...yeah.

Well, that's one way to look at death.

He was the only one who never spoke, if you remember.

xnVjg9.gif

Oh, come now, I've been warning you that this'd happen since she joined.

Lentz actually took advantage of his terrible tactical ability to do something.

And he still failed.

Lentzenheimer.txt

Really, though, I kinda like this line and change of events.

Thanks. I had to make something up for Arkis's extremely dumb movements.

Thou may have been the meanest minion of the banter, but alas, you did not deserve this fate.

Nobody deserves death by Sasha. Nobody. It's a fate worse than death.

AKA how Brave weapons should be balanced.

It's a decent way, that's right.

In other words, there exists a statistically worse joke unit than Evil Goatee man.

I am amazed. Although considering their mutual sulkiness, I can see why sh'es Arkis's betrothed.

Hahahahahahaha, poor Arkis.

Did this turn into a horror game? For the Royal Historian of Wellt*?

Yes. Just, a plain "yes".

I see what you mean by him being relevant last time. That is one heck of a bodyguard.

He's the boss of the chapter. Lentzenheimer's just a bonus.

And a merc only in it for the money. No wonder Lentz hired him.

Anybody with a conscience would've already betrayed him.

Did he give Norton the finger, or is he making a "come-at-me!" gesture?

I don't know, old man Swordmaster animations are weird.

He may not have the speediest sword arm, be he has the strength to make up for it.

To more than make up for it!

HYPE INTENSIFIES!

YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!

This can't get any better. Death by poetic justice.

And we get the Lukuud on top of that! You can't get it by stealing it or mugging him, so it's important to keep Julia or Vega with Runan.

Hahahahaha Brutal!

I told you I did a number on him.

The right kind of anticlimax.

Losing an arm? Anticlimax?

This keeps getting better and better.

Hah, I knew you'd like it.

And you took the words out of my mouth. Except for the Jesus and cursing part.

What, you wouldn't say Jesus fuck? Because it feels nice to say Jesus fuck. C'mon, give it a try: Jesus fuck!

Fitting music for a backstabbing.

Very much so. It's also the generic enemy phase combat theme for Runan.

And now he has blood from the mouth. He is dead, dead, and dead!

...also the detail that his throat is cut open.

Guess this is the reward for using the weaker unit.

A reward I am most happy with.

Carrying on Lentz's legacy, except in a way that doesn't want to give her a nasty death.

Yeah, she's going to be an absolute monster with that, but, a monster on our side, so that's all nice and dandy.

Ever play the Elder Scrolls, Royal Historian of Wellt*?

Doubt it.

Yep. This is a horror game for him.

I mean, he knows Sasha. Of course it is.

No joke; My first thought when I saw this was "why is Arkis wearing a skirt?"

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahah. Gold.

Well, considering how long he's been benched, he get's an A for effort.

He gets an F for "Fuck all" from me.

Well, you deserve a hand for trying. Oh look! Here's one that someone's not using anymore...

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahah... fuckin' savage, man! As if Lentzie wasn't dead enough as it is!

The amount of character dialogue was fine, and it's always enjoyable! That said, I can see why it's uncommon. It's possible to have it be too much of a good thing if it happened every other update.

Yeah, it'd get tiresome if I did it every other day.

I could say how Hell is actually a horrifying place and I wouldn't wish my worst (real life) enemy there, but that's a discussion for elsewhere.

Yes, this was just a joke.

I only have one small, inty-bity, teenie-tiny little question:

  Reveal hidden contents

WHERE IN HELL IS THE SLAVER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Lentzie and Dholm being stuck together is their own personal hell. The Slaver's likely stuck on a treadmill in the deepest circles of hell, naked, while heavily-dressed underaged girls use flamethrowers on him. Yes, that'd be a good start, I think.

...Man, that was a long update. took me 5 hours to write, and I think I'm a little sleep deprived from yesterday, so that explains any weirdness. Still, I have fun making these, and look forward to the next update.

No weirdness that I could notice!

 

Holmes is an idiot:

Spoiler

The last time, we quite literally ripped Lentzenheimer to shreds. Sadly, we lost Lionel and Letena along the way.

Abjd41i9 o

Runan doesn't seem to care much about that, though.

Ih49ob2i oHard to believe it's been two years since we fled to Admiral Vals's in Granada...

Um606rva oIndeed... Two whole years...

Usuqm1o4 o

F4aswdy8 o Bwahahahahahah. Love how he doesn't even spend two seconds celebrating their triumphant return before he starts screaming for Arkis's head to be brought to him on a pike.

Kzudxvlr oPbixj96t o

P1zzgcas o Ah, you're sorry. How nice. It's too bad that I'm personally mad at you, eh?

Ih49ob2i oYou're sorry?!

P1zzgcas o I'm going to enjoy this, aren't I.

Ih49ob2i oDo you really think that apologizing can excuse you, you bloody fool?! Don't you realize what you've done? You deserted your comrades, fled to Lentzenheimer's side, joined the ranks of the Cult...

K3ergjo0 o

F4aswdy8 o Ahahahahahahah! About as Eugen as I expected! Is he seriously about to behead Arkis right here, in the middle of the throne room? In front of the whole army? In front of Kreiss and Lina?! And isn't he supposed to be the guy who can't swing a sword anymore? What, he's gonna saw his head off? Blistering fucking barnacles, this guy's amazing!

Jzntrjyw oAq3dul49 o

4lt3brpp o No! Get out of here, you dimwit! I will not have the execution of Arkis stopped by the likes of you... Arkis impersonator!

0zfd96rn o This does beg the question, though... if Lina dies after recruiting Arkis, what happens? Does Runan interfere instead, or does Eugen succeed in decapitating Arkis in the middle of the throne room like it's nobody's business?

Ih49ob2i oAnd who would you be, little girl?

Zxqkvuce oMy name is Lina, Sir Kreiss's younger sister. Lentzenheimer was holding me hostage to force Sir Arkis to fight against you, his allies! He was not acting of his own volition! He's not the one at fault! If you have to punish someone, punish me for being carelessly captured!

4lt3brpp oTHAT WAS ALSO HIS FAULT IDIOT

Ih49ob2i oI could hardly do such a thing, milady. But why would you vouch for Arkis?

Zxqkvuce oSir Arkis and I are betrothed. I couldn't bear to see my love come to harm!

B8qnojud oLina...

Zxqkvuce oIf it's anyone's fault, it's my own! I won't let you touch Sir Arkis!

Ih49ob2i oWell, that's just too bad. I would much rather not harm a pretty young lady such as yourself, but what can you do.

Zxqkvuce oEEP! Arkis, help me!

B8qnojud oH-Help you?! The old fart's insane! There's no helping anybody when he's involved!

Ih49ob2i oWHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING, RUNNING?! COME AND FACE ME! I'VE STILL GOT SOME FIGHTING SPIRIT LEFT IN ME--

Um606rva oEugen. That would be enough, thank you. I'll take over from here.

Ih49ob2i oBut Lord Runan--

Um606rva oEugen. Need I repeat myself?

Ih49ob2i o...

Xmjjrass o

F4aswdy8 o He already had his sword unsheathed?! This whole scene, man! This is the most Eugen scene since the time Eugen dunked on Holmes, hook, line and sinker! Ahah!

Um606rva oAs for you, Arkis, I want your guarantee that nothing like this will ever happen again.

B8qnojud oYou have my word. Lord Runan, and General Eugen... My deepest apologies.

0zfd96rn o Well, looks like he's been forgiven. Woo. How does Eugen react to this turn of events?

Ih49ob2i oYou're damn lucky your fiancee was here. You're forgiven, but only because of her. You've got a lot of maturing to do, lad! Letting your lady get captured, and being forced to do the enemy's bidding... You dishonor the Knights of Razelia!

Zvm9mdnz o
 
M6bm3dem o

F4aswdy8 o Why, by still murdering Arkis, even though Runan ordered him not to! Bwahahahahah... okay, this almost makes up for him killing Dougy and winning the Hunger Games. Now he just needs to die in horrible pain and misery, after watching his little girlfriend die similarly in front of his eyes, and we'll be even.

B8qnojud oI get it, I get it. I'm no good as a knight. Can you please stop rubbing it in?

Zxqkvuce oGeneral Eugen, leave him to me! I'll watch over Sir Arkis, and I'll make sure he becomes a knight worthy of your praise!

Ih49ob2i oThat's not a bad idea. I can tell you're much more reliable than your poor excuse for a fiance.

0zfd96rn o Dude, she has no strength! Are you just trying to humiliate the guy-- oh. Right, you are. No objections, no objections!

Ih49ob2i oI'll leave Arkis in your capable hands.

Zxqkvuce oThank you, General Eugen! I shall do my utmost!

Zxqkvuce oDid you hear that, Sir Arkis? We get to train together from now on!

0zfd96rn o I'd make a dirty joke about how she's going to train with his pole, but Arkis is so pathetic, he'd probably take her teasing seriously and just hand her his lance. And then Eugen would materialize out of nowhere to whack him on the back of the head for being such a dumbass.

0zfd96rn o Also, she's 14, so I should probably not do these kinds of jokes with her. That's also a reason, but the main reason is that Arkis is awful.

Iiwycdcx o
 
Oaz67hzc o
 
Skjiyf7n o

 

 

2xwurpzj o

F4aswdy8 o Hwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Perfect! The perfect way to end a perfect scene! Could this be the runner-up to Eugen punching Holmes? I think it may be.

Vr1ro63b o

P1zzgcas o Also, I'm pretty sure Eugen's exiting footsteps are meant to be Juliattisnacordst's grandpa (again) entering the room, but Eugen doesn't appear again in this scene, so I like to think he left like a boss and this old fellow happened to come in at the same time.

Um606rva oThen I will go to address them. I owe them at least that for all the suffering they've had to endure in my absence.

Ha0dg21k oOh my, I forgot something important! Allow me to give you this, milord.

Um606rva oSuch ornate armor...

U0usy4lf o

P1zzgcas o Ah, yes. I think we can all guess what's coming.

Um606rva oAnd he left it to me?

Ha0dg21k oNaturally, Lord Runan. This armor, among other things, he instructed me to give to you when you became a man.

0zfd96rn o Who even are you? General Lawrence?

Ha0dg21k oYou might not know this, milord, but before he left for Nolzeria, Lord Gramud went through his entire state to prepare for your succession.

Um606rva oDid he really? Perhaps he predicted that things would go sour at the peace conference in Nolzeria...

Ha0dg21k oLord Gramud did always try to be prepared for the worst.

P1zzgcas o Some nice characterization for Runan's father. I like it. Dads in FE all too often tend to be "dad that dies" and nothing more, especially the ones that die before the game. However, from all we've heard of Gramud, we can get a sense of the kind of man he was - the kind of absolute badass that would have Eugen as his most trusted general. By the way, can I just say "you may not know this" should be used more often instead of "as you know"? Feels a lot more natural for expositional purposes.

Ha0dg21k oRegardless, do try on the armor, Lord Runan. I know it'll suit you well.

Dhrbzzgb o

Here it is, everyone!

8zicekv2 oOozvykdx o

The moment Runan ceases to be a lame Leif clone (although the "lame" part is highly debatable), and becomes...

Rnvwdlkj o

Er, blue? Where's the "ornate" part?

5cr08xl8 o

Oh, I see. Well, he just went from okay swordlocked guy to a swordsman that could go toe-to-toe with Shigen.

Obmhzl6e o

...Oh, I SEE!

Holy shit, he's dashing! I love Runan's promoted armor. It's decorated just enough that it doesn't feel overbearing, but still quite grand. I love it, one of my favourite designs in the game.

Ha0dg21k oSimply splendid, milord Runan! You're the very image of Lord Gramud in his younger days! The citizens will certainly be very moved to see you in his old attire. Let us go to the balcony, then. The people await their hero!

P1zzgcas o Much like Holmes, Runan gets to deliver a speech. Only, he doesn't fail miserably, like Holmes.

Xlsswvt2 o

Ha0dg21k oLong live Lord Runan Selius!

Ndg1ytfy o
 
Cwag7pql o

Llibn6rp oTwo years ago, I failed to protect my home, and you, the people I'd sworn to defend. I ran to fight another day, while you were left behind to suffer under the Emperor's tyranny. I have soiled the legacy and good name of my father, Duke Gramud.

Llibn6rp oBut despite my failures, I promise you this: As your duke, I will forever be your sword and your shield, fighting for the cause of truth and justice both here in Razelia and throughout all of Lieberia. As general of the allied forces, the Champions of Yutona, I will liberate our great kingdom and return peace to our realm. Now that Razelia is freed, our next goal shall be to reclaim the Royal Palace of Reeve, which still remains under Imperial control.

Chnuixzj o

Llibn6rp oFor the future of both our kingdoms, we must not let hatred embitter us.

Ny3tjzqp o
 
Q5g6tyz3 o

 

 

 

4mcp9h0t o

Simply magnificent. I can totally picture Eugen tearing up in the shadows, forcefully hugging Arkis while he screams "ack! Let go of me, old-timer!" and Lina giggles in the background.

And then Eugen grabs Arkis by the hair and slams his face against the wall.

Anyway. Notice that Runan's disappeared? That's the last time we'll see him until the end of the third act, when the plot sandstorms leave to haunt other realms and Holmes goes to Razelia. Quite the good note to end the act on, if I may say so myself.

Noesrzad o

Sadly, we've got filler to get through. To be precise, one chapter and six whole mandatory skirmishes. I've still not quite decided how I'll handle them. The "plot update, gameplay update" format I've been keeping thus far is going to make this rather inconvenient, but I'll manage.

Dwiprbny o

Finally, it's time to go to Yr and see what's so crazy about it.

Vr5sddgs o

Well, the first crazy thing about it is the music. Seriously, listen to that. Remember the other two Best Map Themes Ever? Well, this is another Best Map Theme Ever. Glorious. Much like the other Best Map Themes Ever, though, this one's sadly very rare. It only ever plays here, just like Northern Continent only plays in the Temple of Mars and the Hidden Village. At least May Victory Find Us is slightly more common.

Olntj70f o

Gmhhyxnn oIt's the Guardians... They've broken out of the tower!

04edcfbn oWhat kind of Guardians?

Gmhhyxnn oBewitched monsters and the like. The White Sage Monster used to keep them in the old prison cells of the Tower and used them to ward off invaders and thieves. They're normally harmless to civilians...

04edcfbn oBut something's got them riled up, huh?

0zfd96rn o Oh, brother. From Lentzenheimer, Eugen, and that epic speech and armor, to generic monsters summoned by the game's Gotoh (whose name I can't be bothered to correct). But at least Holmes hasn't been stupid yet--

992fhlbc o

4lt3brpp o Me and my fucking mouth... what do you mean, you've got "a few ideas"? No, you don't! Nobody's broken into the tower! You have no reason at all to even believe somebody may've broken into the tower! You would, if Krishna was still alive, because then, you would've discovered just five minutes ago that Krishna ran off with the Dakruon, making this her most likely destination! As it is, this is just one more instance of the story snapping in half due to the death of yet another unit that requires good die rolls in order to survive! Why is it always Holmes's route that does this?! It's like the whole deal with Plum consumed all of the Asshole Points for Runan's route, and Kaga had to just drop the rest of his terrible ideas in Holmes's!

Gmhhyxnn oThat, or maybe the White Sage's spell on them has started to wear off. He has been dead for centuries...

0zfd96rn o Wait, what? But wasn't he...?

On 4/27/2019 at 1:21 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Muvphmfm oWait, didn't you say before that Sage Morse was Eisenbach and Guenchaos's teacher? How could he have also been alive almost three hundred years ago to do that?

Isjtcw0y o

0zfd96rn o...ooooooooookaaaaaaaaaay, that's a contradiction.

Gmhhyxnn oRegardless, these monsters don't stand a chance against Yoda. Nothing to panic about.

04edcfbn oThink we ought to help him anyway?

Gmhhyxnn oMight as well... Let's try to make it to the Tower. I'm sure he's on his way there already.

0zfd96rn o Nice, a filler chapter. Well, if nothing else, it seems we're going to see this Yoda, at last.

Awbpnrd5 o
 
Xppckrid o
 
Bbsv8v0l o
 
Kqsolj29 o
 
Cihl5bbt o
 
3xujmhk4 o
 
52wrk0ft o
 
B4bxwegw o
 
Utowh7p8 o

 

 

 

Gnsbq7mj o

 

 

 

All righto, then. Next time, fillers and Yoda. Does that not sound like fun? Next time, next time.

I do want to address something before hitting "submit reply", though. We'll get the chance to revive people in just a couple of updates. The time has come to start with the suggestions. Krishna is coming back, unless you can convince me otherwise. I'll save a use to revive Letena at the end. That leaves one use up for grabs. Feel free to suggest who you want to bring back in the replies!

Till then, do fare well. See you all next time, in this very same place!

Death count: Attrom
                        Juliattisnacordst
                        Sharon
                        Krishna
                        Indiana Jones
                        Lee

                        The Roger The Paladin
                        Lionel
                        Letena

*26A only

Reset count: 2 (Runan: 1 - Katri: 1)

Dullahan's done with my incompetence: 7

 

BONUS: The deleted scenes from chapters 26A and B! Here they are. They're not much, but there are some awesome lines sprinkled here and there, so take a look.

Spoiler
48avocno o

First, the outro to Chapter 25 if you seize the keep Simon and his goons were guarding.

Um606rva oI wanted to avoid troubling the citizens living near the northern fortress. It seemed to be the best course of action.

Ih49ob2i oA prudent decision, milord. Besides, this way we have a more direct route to Castle Razelia. I'm looking forward to seeing that brat Lentzenheimer's surprised face!

0zfd96rn o It doesn't make any sense (what citizens? There are more people living in the desert, there's nobody anywhere near Zepp's fortress!), and it lacks the build-up for Barker and Julius. I prefer 26A's version, myself.

M1wbvcqn o

In the intro of 26A, there's a scene with Lina that I omitted because, in the LP, she'd already been captured alongside Arkis.

Zxqkvuce oReally?! Lord Runan is back? I'm going to go help out!

Ha0dg21k oWhat are you saying, Lina? Be a good girl and let the knights handle the dangerous bits. There's no need for you to get involved.

Zxqkvuce oBut I'm almost a knight too... almost!

0zfd96rn o 2 mastery. Just saying. Then again, Arkis was a knight back in chapter 1 when he only had 3, so I suppose she's right. Still, says something about the Razelian army's standards, that 3 mastery's the bare minimum they require to enter knighthood.

Zxqkvuce oI've been praciticing my riding and my swordsmanship a lot! You've seen it, right, Grandfather?

Ha0dg21k oYes, yes, but fighting a stuffed dummy and a real soldier are very different. You're not even close to combat-ready.

Qzevcpen o

0zfd96rn o Wait, what? Where did that come from? Arkis left with Runan! And Grandpa Kreiss knows this, as we'll find out later. Why'd he say something like that?

Ha0dg21k oBesides, who was it who ran home crying the other day saying she wasn't strong enough to protect her fiance?

P1zzgcas o Ah, the irony.

Ha0dg21k oI'm sorry, Lina, but I just don't think you're ready. Until Kreiss comes to get you, it'll be beest for everyone if you wait here.

Z48vpqb7 o

This is what he says if you visit his house in 26A. I sneakily avoided it, of course.

Ha0dg21k oThank you kindly!

0zfd96rn o See what I told you? This guy knows that Arkis is fine! If he thought Arkis was captured by Lentzie, he wouldn't so nonchalantly ask for him to be brought here! What was that line from earlier, then? A leftover from a beta version of the chapter?

Cskdcspr o

Oh, well. Leaving that silliness aside, here's Kreiss recruiting Lina.

Sjl5htjr oThank you, Grandfather. I hope my little sister hasn't been giving you too much trouble.

Ha0dg21k oNonsense! She's been a dear! Most of the time, anyway. I know she'll be glad to see you. I'll go and get her.

Otu9glfz o

Zxqkvuce oLord Brother!?

Sjl5htjr oHello, Lina. You're looking as energetic as ever.

Zxqkvuce oI'm so glad you're okay, Lord Brother! Ever since you left with Lord Runan during the Battle of Granada, I couldn't stop worrying about you... It's been so lonely here with just Grandfather to keep me company.

Sjl5htjr oI'm sorry I had to leave you like that. But we're back together now, so don't worry your pretty little head, Lina.

Zxqkvuce oReally?! You mean I can come with you?

J9by41se o

P1zzgcas o Hahahahah... Poor Kreiss. If she'd tried emulating him instead of his friend, she might've actually been a good unit. Alas...

Zxqkvuce oI've already decided, Lord Brother! I'm going to stay true to the family legacy and become a knight myself! I've been training really hard with Grandfather while you were gone!

Sjl5htjr oWait, Lina, let's talk this over first...

Belqup7p o

Ha0dg21k oI've been telling her that she's still not ready to fight in a real battle, but she'll learn a lot more at your side than from my drilling exercises. Do take her with you, won't you, my boy?

Sjl5htjr o...I understand, Grandfather. I'll look after her and train her.

Tpbyx1sw o

0zfd96rn o You mean never?

Zxqkvuce oYes, Lord Brother! I promise!

Jgh4asig o

That was painless enough, but let's check out Arkis's version now.

Kh8446hp o

B8qnojud oIn case you didn't notice, there's a war out there that I've been fighting in. It's been a struggle just to get here. Lina's here, right? I've come to pay her a visit.

Ha0dg21k oWell, it's about damn time! War or no war, you don't just leave your fiancee behind like that! If my granddaughter wasn't so smitten with you, I'd have called off the wedding ages ago.

0zfd96rn o Okay, let's be fair with Arkis for a moment. How was he supposed to come see Lina? He was all the way in Wellt in Runan's army, and as if that wasn't enough of a problem, there's Lentzenheimer to take into account. If anything, you should be proud that he didn't just desert the army and sold his soul to Lentzenheimer in order to return to her side. Like... he kinda does, in... 26B...

0zfd96rn o Why was I trying to defend him, again?

Ha0dg21k oAll right, wait here. I'll go get her.

5ptdzzme o

B8qnojud oGeez, I finally get a chance to visit, and that's the welcome I get?

Zxqkvuce oWelcome back, Sir Arkis! I'm glad to see you safe and sound.

B8qnojud oS-Same here... You've gotten taller since I last saw you. Have you been eating properly?

Zxqkvuce oPlease, Sir Arkis, I'm fourteen. I'm not an child(sic) that needs looking after.

B8qnojud oWhy does everyone keep saying that? You ARE still a child, Lina.

0zfd96rn o A child that was ready to lose her head to save you from your own temerary bravado. If she's a child, you're a goddamned fetus, Arkis!

Ha0dg21k oYes, yes, she's still young now, but give her a few years, and she'll have blossomed into a fine young woman! There's no need to rush things, even if you are engaged.

Xotpuzyf o

Ha0dg21k oDon't be like that, Arkis. You wouldn't want to upset your fiancee, now would you? And especially not your future in-laws...

Lgnhtosu o

F4aswdy8 o ...okay, now this whole scene was worth it.

B8qnojud oUgh... I'm not exactly opposed to it... everything's just moving too fast, that's all.

Zxqkvuce oSir Arkis? I want to go with you and fight for Lord Runan, too...

B8qnojud oCome again?

Zxqkvuce oI've been training really hard to become a knight just like you! I promise I won't slow you down! Honest!

3sedsb1r o

0zfd96rn o Particular? He let Zieg's suspicious ass join! He lets Sasha's insanity slide! He puts up with Enteh's "mysteriousness"! He has Holmes as his best friend, for crying out loud!

Ha0dg21k oOh, I'm sure it'll be fine if you put in a good word for her. Besides, you're a fine knight, so protecting her shouldn't be any issue.

0zfd96rn o Need I say anything?

B8qnojud oDon't try and butter me up, you old geezer.

0zfd96rn o Also, Pengaius must be having the time of his life reading this one sentence.

B8qnojud oYou're just setting me up so I have to spend more time with her.

B8qnojud o...Fine. I got it, I got it. Gather your things, Lina. And from now on, you be careful to never go off by yourself. Stay by my side at all times, got it?

Wto0tkax o

0zfd96rn o I'm sure. Fun fact: going through 26A gets Lina and Arkis a bad ending. You need to go through 26B to get them their good ending. Now I regret everything...

6dop8pt2 o

Tragically, Arkis passed away inmediately after the visit, fallen prey to Lentzenheimer's Super Secret Stealth Att--

Njuabvmt o

...this guy's set out to annoy me, hasn't he?

Mxt1mq22 o

Whatever. Last deleted scene: the real intro to 26B.

Ih49ob2i oYour orders, milord?

Um606rva oKeep pushing forward, of course! Onward, to the castle!

0zfd96rn o But you're already in the castle...

Well, at any rate, that's it. What do you think about these scenes? Are you worried about the nonexistent civilians as well? Do you ship Arkis and Kreiss's grandfather? Tell me in the replies.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's remarkable how well that scene resonates with Arkis being such a poor unit. It's like he was supposed to be shitty. And hey, there is even a shop you can put Arkis in.
I put my money on that whole scene just skipping if Lena dies after recruiting Arkis. Gonna have to try that out on my next run. This seems like a good thing to use the Save Staff for.

Since we are not going to see Krishnea in the tower, maybe now I could explain the issue that I brought up about Krishnea holding a Thunder Sword when she leaves the party.
When we would see Krishnea again, it would be in one of the floors of the tower as an NPC, who supposedly got herself injured and can't move. Since she is alone inside a locked room, she should in theory be save until you reach her.
Unfortunately the game doesn't actually prevent her from moving. And unlike every other character leaving the party, she keeps her items. So if she has a Thunder Sword, she will try to attack over the walls and put herself in range of the enemies. And the enemies in the tower are statistically tough. They may wreck her before you get the opportunity to get out the Physics.

It's unfortunate that she of all people doesn't follow the usual rules of people leaving the party. I suppose the reason she gets to keep her weapons is because she is practically never actually gone. She would only leave at the end of the previous map and would be back before the end of this series of random battles. And getting her back should be a foregone conclusion, since you have to talk to her with Shigen, who always has to be deployed and is not allowed to die.

Edited by BrightBow
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Wrmmtg9j o

Behold, the contestants! Team 1 is me, me and Bismarck because why not. Team 2 is the readers. I had to fit every single reader except for Hawky and Butterman into a single Morgan. Please take no offense that you weren't all included

What are you talking about? I'm right there in Team 4.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Hkox0mdj o

This is the part where I started to laugh my ass off.

@Pengaius is suddenly straight for Arkis.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Xslasmqz o

For some reason, Maerchen was suicidal throughout the whole thing. All he ever did was ask people to kill him. But nobody wanted to bother. Lentzenheimer probably enjoyed seeing him squirm. I mean, try to watch while keeping the blood from getting into his one eye. Or maybe he just couldn't kill him with his one arm.

Lentzenheimer probably is the type where consent is a turn-off. Yes, the implication there is intentional. He's scum.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Bykwgwpp o

This is just here because Indy's name works hilariously well.

This is art.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Khfctvat o

Then--

...

...you've got to be kidding-- I GOT KILLED BY THE BRILLIANT DUMBASS! THE BRILLIANT DUMBASS OF ALL PEOPLE! AND ALONGSIDE HOLMES, AGAIN, OF ALL PEOPLE! C'MON! WHAT IS THIS?!

This was the crowning achievement of the brilliant dumbass' life.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Syatw1yo o

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! This. This is the most perfect picture in the entire thing. Like, this is random, right? It could not have been any more perfect! I didn't edit anything, in fact, I'll give you the code later in case you want to check out the entire thing in detail!

I stand corrected. This is art.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Ihrvdz4z o

...wh... why? The Roger dies of The Thirst, and Bismarck dies to Butterman. This is clearly the worst timeline.

Q0cfviyd o

Lionel, too, betrays me, and then literally all the readers of the thread pass out on a pile.

*All the readers except me, Hawkwing and Butterman. Because I'm dead because go figure carrying three litres of water everywhere wasn't enough.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Yzvjejle o

All the readers commit mass suicide.

That's a sentence I said. Huh.

Yeah well, look at how ridiculous this time line got.

 

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is the last time I let myself fall for the RNGoddess's tricks. Rigged, that was rigged! It was fucking rigged! The RNGoddess is out to get me! You, Hawkwing... you're the one who inspired me to do this! You led me into this mess! It's all your fault! You... you're Butterman! That's right! You're Butterman's secret identity, you led me to this disaster, and now you're probably laughing!

But I'll have the last laugh! Arkis will die, and I'll see to it that his is a slow and painful demise! 

Up until he killed Dougy, I imagine you would have preferred Arkis winning to the Horseman.

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I've got to say, though, you got a little carried away there. Like, c'mon. Comparing me to that? This dude was being an effortless troll, whereas I put thought behind my crackpot Berwick cultist statements.

Honestly, I just felt like referencing that guy, given last year it used to be inane top tens/"x is a rip-off of y" threads until inevitably he forced the ban with the very post you quoted. Besides, you brought it to mind with "master race" talk. Mind you, every time I hear "hobbits" that thread pops into mind these days (given they were one of the fictional races listed)

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Holy shit. Bwahahahahahah. Amazing! And you even forgot some. Where's General Lawrence?

There's an incredible meta-joke to a list of jokes not containing General Lawrence when his absence in game is what caused the joke in the first place. Doubly so when it was unintended.

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I tried asking them to allow me to record one of their sessions, but they said something along the lines of "we have nothing to say to you you killed us" and hung up.

Maybe I reached the wrong number.

Yeah, I'm thinking you just got the help group for "ex-minions of brilliant dumbasses" by mistake. Or perhaps the "Four Horsemen" club in hell, which is kind of like a biker's gang, but with Horsemen, and in hell. And the name's a lie because there's more than 4 of them.

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:


Come now, don't ignore my version.

Yeah, but I couldn't not make a joke about the fact there was an outlaw by the name of Richard Barter who went by the alias "Rattlesnake Dick".

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahahahaha, nobody dies quite like Eugen.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o This does beg the question, though... if Lina dies after recruiting Arkis, what happens? Does Runan interfere instead, or does Eugen succeed in decapitating Arkis in the middle of the throne room like it's nobody's business?

Eugen succeeds, but Arkis isn't using his head anyway, so you don't lose a unit.
 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Zvm9mdnz o

Is Kaga low key having a dig at what he did with Abel and Est? Or is the intended use for Lina and Arkis as the shopkeeps?
 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Now he just needs to die in horrible pain and misery, after watching his little girlfriend die similarly in front of his eyes, and we'll be even.

Little harsh... on Lina anyway.
 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

B8qnojud oDon't try and butter me up, you old geezer.

0zfd96rn o Also, Pengaius must be having the time of his life reading this one sentence.

Kaga does it first: Pengauis jokes edition.
 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

I do want to address something before hitting "submit reply", though. We'll get the chance to revive people in just a couple of updates. The time has come to start with the suggestions. Krishna is coming back, unless you can convince me otherwise. I'll save a use to revive Letena at the end. That leaves one use up for grabs. Feel free to suggest who you want to bring back in the replies!

Till then, do fare well. See you all next time, in this very same place!


I've got my suggestion in my name. It's not changing. He's not been dead long, so issues with level shouldn't be as severe as with someone like Attrom, Sharon or Juliatisnacordst who died earlier and Mel would probably appreciate it. Lionel would also be a solid candidate, but his name's not as fun, and as you said... he had started to be average. Having addressed the competition I believe my argument is solid (after all, you've established Krishna and Letena, Indiana Jones is immune for some reason, and Lee is safeLee in the army in this route)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Also, what the hell was I doing chasing Mel? C'mon, me, you know better than that, she's to be married!

Correction: She "was" to be married.

Edited by BrightBow
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since Plum finally met dad, I'm nominating Lionel.  Assuming Lina and Arkis get married, he can forcefully invite himself to the wedding by reminding them that he died for their sake.  And then he can eat all the food or something.

Also, badassness is like talent - it can exist within a person, but in order to truly shine, it must be honed.  I suspect Kreiss' grandpa gave Eugen a few pointers in his younger days!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5cb9146756990_CantcommentonLP.png.015ea44bb42137aeccf132c9893fbe3a.png

On 6/16/2019 at 9:36 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Ever hear the legend that inspired the Jack O'Lantern? It was of a man named Jack who had personally slighted the Devil, so hell would not take him, but who was far too wicked for heaven. His spirit was condemned to wander the Earth, with nothing but a Lantern as guidance. Long story short, I think Slaver copped a similar deal. Never to truly pass on to the afterlife. After all, if one legend gives the devil standards....

Huh, I did not know of that story. That's actually pretty interesting.

So what's the connection to pumpkins?

On 6/16/2019 at 9:36 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

I paid a bit of attention to copyright law. There's a surprising amount of stuff that's fell into the public domain either by sheer age (Dracula, fairly recently Tarzan), lack of renewal (the Charles Biro version of Daredevil, completely unrelated to Marvel's one, who wore a suit the was split down the middle Red & Blue with a spike belt. This character was mute, and was raised by "Australian pygmies" (which is weird, because while there was a race of pygmy in Australia, they were, according to records wiped out when the group collectively referred to as Indigineous Australians arrived... quite long ago) after his parents were killed by his uncle for their fortune on a trip to a mine they owned. As one may expect of a character in such a position, he fought using boomerangs, and his archnemesis was the Claw, who could best be described as an intelligent Kaiju.

Interesting. Out of question, is that online online somewhere as a PDF or something?

On 6/16/2019 at 9:36 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Personally I'm more worried about sleep paralysis. The hallucinations it brings can be horrific.

*Looks it up*

Yeah, I can see how that can be considered scarier. I do not blame you in the slightest.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Team 2 is the readers. I had to fit every single reader except for Hawky and Butterman into a single Morgan.

I am both honored and concerned about getting my own character slot.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Hkox0mdj o

This is the part where I started to laugh my ass off.

Was Arkis being a girl intentional or did you forget to change the gender?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Bykwgwpp o

This is just here because Indy's name works hilariously well.

It's a genius name that works regardless of context.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Syatw1yo o

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! This. This is the most perfect picture in the entire thing. Like, this is random, right? It could not have been any more perfect! I didn't edit anything, in fact, I'll give you the code later in case you want to check out the entire thing in detail!

Reminds me of the first time I did the Hunger games simulation. I chose Blustone characters, and there were coincidences that I couldn't make up if I tried. That reminds me that I actually thought about posting the highlights as a FftF topic, but that happened around a month ago. Might get to it when erratic posting gets to it.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
8xvmoat2 o

Garo kills one of the Eugens. This is completely out of character, and I elect to consider that this Eugen was an evil clone of Eugen, hence why Garo killed him.

Or He's Eugen in the timeline where he was elected president, and put into practice the belief that everyone should die in battle.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Zrltoh91 o

Dude-- Hawkwing, what the hell!? Why!? Did Butterman pay you to do this!? I'll skin you aliv-- never mind I'm dead, but somebody will kill you in my stead, you'll see!

An important rule of combat: Always observe and use the environment.

And maybe don't have knife fights near cliffs.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Raof9qjg o

Poor Brigadier was never a very fortunate man.

He never was.

And Indy's name continues to produce hilarious results.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Gjpovogv o

Well, you know what? At least this little asshole died a death as pathetic as mine. Small victories.

Hmve1pjc o

...and then Maerchen died in exactly the same way. Man, that pit's the real MVP of the game.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Xslasmqz o

Looks like their fates were joined.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Skqwzshr o

Oh, what?! No! It started so well, but now it's derailing into an absolute trainwreck! Everyone's dying randomly!

Mel entered the Oregon Trail by accident, and forgot to rest for 4 days.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Athryakz o

HAWKWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! STOP KILLING EVERYONE I LIKE AND KILL ARKIS!

Well, I strangled him for no reason at all.

In truth, it was to prove that I was the superior player of The Emperors Tomb.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Fwmnzzqh o

Sure, kill him as well. You kill Indy and Esther, but then fail to beat Arkis? You disappoint me, Hawky.

I looked at the code you linked at the end. Turns out, I was actually quite diplomatic throughout most of the game. Guess I failed my speech roll at a critical point.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Yzvjejle o

All the readers commit mass suicide.

That's a sentence I said. Huh.

That's a sentence I never expected to read.

This whole thing is gold.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Iibth6h0 o

Maybe Runan was so lost in his imagination about how gorily Arkis would die that he forgot how to set the mine?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

M12jpgyg o

Welp. Guess that was a thing.

On the bright side, maybe this will make it up to Butterman after Arkis failed to level up.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It'd be one in mine as well, but his beard is so pathetic, I just can't accept it as a win.

I'm just happy that the door is open for Lords to have beards in their own game. Within time, we'll reach the point where the phrase "it looks like a bear crawled onto his chin and died" will appropriately describe an FE character!

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I suppose I can understand that, but still. Quite the letdown, graphically.

If they're a bright spot in this, it's that the menus look great, you can finally free roam the battle maps, and the next game will probably be a significant improvement in this area.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nonsense! I am perfectly sane! Here's a picture of me saving a kitty falling from a tree. No insane person would save a kitty falling from a tree, right? Well, I have, and here is the proof:

Ltfyndlj o

See? Sane.

Several things:

- How did you make that a gif?

- You thought you were subtle, but I saw through your trickery! You want us to play Berwick Saga!

- The sun joke is great.

- I hope you have soft shoes or a safety net or something down there for the cat to safely land on.

- No wonder you lost control of casting spells. Your hands and arms are in the middle of your torso, and they don't have any fingers or opposable thumbs.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, you've got no childhood, then. Remember when I said I was never a movie or show kid? Well, that one show is my entire childhood. Code Lyoko, man. That shit was the shit back in my day. I understand it wasn't such a hit in the States, but here in Spain, it's my entire generation's childhood. I'm currently in the middle of rewatching it after so many years, and let me tell you, maybe it's just the nostalgia, but it manages to be good in spite of a thousand flaws that it has. Kinda like Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Or Fire Emblem. Or... me! Fascinating. It appears my whole life has lead to one, singular realization: Berwick Saga. Are you playing Berwick Saga yet?

I looked it up, and now I'm wondering if I've seen it before. Nothing more than part of a single episode, but the combination of 2D and 3D animation, and having there be both a real world and a computer world, seems very familiar to me. I don't remember where or when I first saw it, either, but thanks for jogging my memory for something that happened over a decade back.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

The lines weren't what I intended you to focus on. It was the edgy-ass haircut covering one eye. Also, the fact that he's literally pink.

Maybe I'm just so conditioned to seeing anime characters with ridiculous hair that I no longer notice.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, I understand. Well, I like it, but to each their own.

Depends on the game, honestly. Sometimes, it works well. Sometimes, it works very well. Other times, well...

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah, oh, you spared no time before you stole that expression, eh?

Didn't you say that I could use it free of charge earlier?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...

I have to say. This came to my mind. I was praying it wasn't what you were getting at. Clearly my prayers went unanswered. Is it because of all the times I've stated that I don't believe in God...?

The idea came the moment I saw the name.

Besides, I need more practice on Paint.net anyway.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

By the way I love how the picture is called literally "Clifford joke.png"

Spoiler

 

LECBrZP2g0POviNVXKDWo7EKmDIZvBQgvcenzYGejYhZbqsItRsV0sWeMl8DWj5VJmsq6MRmiH9s4yySaIdtoBLBWkKyI4aCnPvVeVkaYwXrIsV6VmlkVLDDEkP5E3ACr9NPj77h

 

fqJx_13j_91LfIaWK3aF5N8e1uDisv_gmXvD5mY-q6at_-vP-5cuZ3psaqkoqWZwVGPVT96bsrffIGLy7g38Pxy0rwV88MLCgZgLbamzQRDeusP1gELhG5j4mzNmiRqKAWzjM53g

I range in how creative I am with the names.

Light spoilers for a joke I'll do a short scroll down.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

No, Faye is just a plain Myrmidon who promotes to Swordmaster. Also, no, Marcel isn't wearing a skirt, give up.

The Faye joke was about how mercenaries promote into myrmidons in Echoes, yet despite being a villager, she can't become one. As for Marcel, okay then, what is the non-metal cloth that is hanging around their waist that extend to past their knees?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahah, Avengers memes. I wish they were as self-explanatory as the ones from Star Wars. This one is, of course, but...

Actually...

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oki-dokie.

Since it's later...

U5areb5h oGirl, bring out my old sword and armor so I can give them to my son. It's time you stopped playing archer and took up a real weapon for once.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnThey won't be necessary.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnIn truth, I never wanted to become a sea captain. Or an admiral Or even an adventurer.

U5areb5h oWhat?!?

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnI wanna be a plane!

LtIoLSD7jjVM2Cbmr82yGrlDG3qpBMMzS_lyvu2ih12Ay6f-XhMYNb6IYex75JZXIf99UnC2oViXqj1AfQ8y-6Xl6C4p-brsTW26I_1e1nI-SY1fv7r7N73AcR5tlHPYwSTzMohO

fcflsoHngxZziYZ1zxhF1KJ9CjhTOA2wJDZr9aDP2dBkfB7b4iPnq4dhfRmr9kP719PH3tlgyabq9hdNYxkJ1AVM0no6zH7IulD7qFQvnbT9FaUEeE3bX5s975KmX9ldxIAC3VQc

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BWHAAAAAT?!?!

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1B...
zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BI spent my whole life... learning how to fly...

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BAnd then this dastard becomes a Stealth Hunter without even trying!

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BWhy did you promote me, Ruben?!

f_VoSudK1lleXpsH0-ODc3c-pWPDk4VmT5emHpQvK967UDbBpc2gn7njN71vKCUkldq40H5Fkq3iEsyf5cZ3C_0-JM1-O-Eay2ghCo62o3X7WrZEbAPl9bxfhjGSq-Mjv4byfnGfHey, I held a funeral for your plane pose! And it was either a promotion or you joined the bench alongside Alician!

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Again! I'm on a roll of good points today. Let's have three more, and then I'll have FIVE POINTS!!

It's honestly a shame that the OVA isn't referenced more in the series itself. Sure, I don't want it to acknowledge memes to the point it distracts from supports and story moments, but throwing this dog a few more bones would be nice to see.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Jeez, now that's an interesting mental image... not-stupid Holmes!

It is extremely difficult yet somehow possible to picture such a thing existing.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

There's the downside that you pretty much cannot use that character any more after that. Losing a jaw is kind of a big deal.

I'd beg to differ..., but yeah. That would really only work in a weird and creepy series where body horror and grotesque things are common.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahah, oh, my goodness. What "wrong idea"?

This is one of those moments where I forgot to think the entire joke through.

Lets just say that I learned the hard way that I should take TV Tropes seriously when they say that a single trope is very constant, that I should really stop looking up random games online, and that a plot being interesting and the things you can do in it can be two very different things.

Thankfully, I stockpiled a lot of brain bleach.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It's a game that hates the player, like its creator. But not as much as Thracia, I can tell you that much.

Speaking of which, how's the gameplay of Thracia? I know that you've talked about the game before, but I'm curious on your thoughts about the unique mechanics and difficulty and the like.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

You forget everything, so that's no surprise.

Fair point. Being preoccupied with classes and job searching doesn't help.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

No, actually, that's the Sol sword. Notice it's bright red?

Right. ...Man, I need to check these things again. I mean, I did a few days ago when rereading past updates, but still.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It's a trail, damnit! It signifies fast movement!

I know. But it's fun to joke about when in still-frame.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Noooot quite. If we were to rate the game based solely on its arrow design, it'd get a solid 2/10.

1/5 "I can tell it's an arrow".

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Every cleric has the same sprite.

Really? Then why does... Eteth...Enteh, right? Have a long dress?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Eeeeee magic snort snort?

Magic; The plot device that mends plot holes as easily as it creates them.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Who doesn't want a peaceful death?

Vikings who want to go to Vahalla, people wanting to die knowing the limits of their strength, Eugen...

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Long-time TF2 Medic main here. Draw your own conclusions!

I have/shall!

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

And then he took Lentzenheimer's other eye for it! Kinda. I wanted to imply that Norton just barely missed the eye so that, you know, it made sense that he was still up and about to get disarmed by Julia.

Or his eye was chapped up, but still intact?

I've heard about someone getting a paper cut in their eye before, so it's not too far fetched.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It makes more sense when he's armed. He holds his sword behind his back with a reverse grip.

Right. I believe we saw that animation before.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually, they both have the same movement. 4 is Garo's base, and with his skills, Tom also reaches 4.

Right.

Well, still goes to Garo. Tom has Ballista and bow options.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

He was the only one who never spoke, if you remember.

That's the problem with Morgans. They can blend in together if you don't pay attention.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, come now, I've been warning you that this'd happen since she joined.

I looked back, and you are right that she has very limited availability and usefulness.

I feel like I'm missing something about her having to die, though.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nobody deserves death by Sasha. Nobody. It's a fate worse than death.

Except the slaver.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Anybody with a conscience would've already betrayed him.

"I mean, somebody has to take the money away from evil overlords."- Golgotha

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Losing an arm? Anticlimax?

Nah, I mean Julia killing him with absolutely no effort.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...also the detail that his throat is cut open.

Even better! Add an extra Dead!

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahah... fuckin' savage, man! As if Lentzie wasn't dead enough as it is!

The moment I saw that his arm was missing, I knew I had to put that joke somewhere.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

P1zzgcas o I'm going to enjoy this, aren't I.

We all are.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
K3ergjo0 o

F4aswdy8 o Ahahahahahahah! About as Eugen as I expected! Is he seriously about to behead Arkis right here, in the middle of the throne room? In front of the whole army? In front of Kreiss and Lina?! And isn't he supposed to be the guy who can't swing a sword anymore? What, he's gonna saw his head off? Blistering fucking barnacles, this guy's amazing!

He'd karate chop Arkis's head off if needbe.

A few sentances in and this is already rivaling Eugen punching Holmes.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o This does beg the question, though... if Lina dies after recruiting Arkis, what happens? Does Runan interfere instead, or does Eugen succeed in decapitating Arkis in the middle of the throne room like it's nobody's business?

Runan would probably intervene. He probably thinks enough blood was spilled regaining their home, and killing even a deserted soldier isn't worth it.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

F4aswdy8 o He already had his sword unsheathed?! This whole scene, man! This is the most Eugen scene since the time Eugen dunked on Holmes, hook, line and sinker! Ahah!

The small detail about his sword being unsheathed adds so much.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Zvm9mdnz o
 
M6bm3dem o

He would, but it seems that this grumpy shopkeeper bought it first. To bad he didn't learn his lesson in patience.

Also, insert *If words could do damage, Eugen would break the game* jokes.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ih49ob2i oThat's not a bad idea. I can tell you're much more reliable than your poor excuse for a fiance.

I would not be surprised if Kaga gave Lina crappy growths just to make this joke.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
2xwurpzj o

F4aswdy8 o Hwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Perfect! The perfect way to end a perfect scene! Could this be the runner-up to Eugen punching Holmes? I think it may be.

All that's missing is sunglasses and an explosion.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
U0usy4lf o

P1zzgcas o Ah, yes. I think we can all guess what's coming.

Promotion time!

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Holy shit, he's dashing! I love Runan's promoted armor. It's decorated just enough that it doesn't feel overbearing, but still quite grand. I love it, one of my favourite designs in the game.

Except for the swearing you took the words out of my mouth.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Q5g6tyz3 o

I love (naratively anyway) the comparisons and contrasts between these Holmes and Runans promotions and speeches. Really does seem like they're two sides of the same coin here.

Also, that was a great speech. Looks like Runan actually has some points in Charisma (and Intelligence, but we knew that already).

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, the first crazy thing about it is the music. Seriously, listen to that. Remember the other two Best Map Themes Ever? Well, this is another Best Map Theme Ever. Glorious. Much like the other Best Map Themes Ever, though, this one's sadly very rare. It only ever plays here, just like Northern Continent only plays in the Temple of Mars and the Hidden Village. At least May Victory Find Us is slightly more common.

It is a good song I agree.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gmhhyxnn oIt's the Guardians... They've broken out of the tower!

04edcfbn oWhat kind of Guardians?

The Guardians of the Galaxy? The Guardians from the Rise of the Guardians? The 16 Colossi? The Newspaper?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gmhhyxnn oBewitched monsters and the like.

Oh

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
992fhlbc o

4lt3brpp o Me and my fucking mouth... what do you mean, you've got "a few ideas"? No, you don't! Nobody's broken into the tower! You have no reason at all to even believe somebody may've broken into the tower! You would, if Krishna was still alive, because then, you would've discovered just five minutes ago that Krishna ran off with the Dakruon, making this her most likely destination! As it is, this is just one more instance of the story snapping in half due to the death of yet another unit that requires good die rolls in order to survive! Why is it always Holmes's route that does this?! It's like the whole deal with Plum consumed all of the Asshole Points for Runan's route, and Kaga had to just drop the rest of his terrible ideas in Holmes's!

Well, Runan's route has Zach disappearing of the face of the planet, but yeah. I wouldn't be surprised if Kaga learned from these mistake regarding character deaths affecting the story and planned ahead in Berwick Saga.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o...ooooooooookaaaaaaaaaay, that's a contradiction.

Maybe it's an in-universe confusion?

I mean, the Elder Scrolls has books  that intentionally have contradictory facts and events when compared with each other to give the world a sense that something was rewritten for some reason and that just like in real life, you cannot know the full story of events you did not witness.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
52wrk0ft o
 
B4bxwegw o

I'm trying to think of something fancy to say, but it keeps eluding me. I really like Shigens line right here, for some reason.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o 2 mastery. Just saying. Then again, Arkis was a knight back in chapter 1 when he only had 3, so I suppose she's right. Still, says something about the Razelian army's standards, that 3 mastery's the bare minimum they require to enter knighthood.

I suppose they were looking for cannon fodder instead of elite soldiers at the time.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ha0dg21k oI'm sorry, Lina, but I just don't think you're ready. Until Kreiss comes to get you, it'll be beest for everyone if you wait here.

*Beest*

The Lee puns are starting to affect even unrelated things...

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o Why was I trying to defend him, again?

That he was fighting in a war and thus logically couldn't see his fiancee until they were on the same continent.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Lgnhtosu o

F4aswdy8 o ...okay, now this whole scene was worth it.

Guess it's Arkis's turn to be the punching bag. And for people to turn his own words on him.

Are we certain that Arkis isn't a half-brother to Holmes?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

B8qnojud oDon't try and butter me up, you old geezer.

0zfd96rn o Also, Pengaius must be having the time of his life reading this one sentence.

This is either a hilarious coincidence, or Kaga saw into the future, knew that a kid would love both butter and Arkis, and decided to make him a sucky unit out of pure spite.

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o I'm sure. Fun fact: going through 26A gets Lina and Arkis a bad ending. You need to go through 26B to get them their good ending. Now I regret everything...

What's the difference?

On 6/18/2019 at 8:03 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Mxt1mq22 o

Well, that explains the cells at least. Outside of Lina, they were kinda just there otherwise.

***

Man, I really shouldn't have put this off for so long. Life got busy, and everytime I sat down and started writing, I realized early on that I wouldn't have time to finish.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Interesting. Out of question, is that online online somewhere as a PDF or something?

Of course. This site is entirely dedicated to containing all those Golden Age/Silver Age stories from comics that have had the trademark lapse. My personal favourite is the "Steel Sterling" origin from Zip Comics (also by Charles Biro), where the protagonist gets Superman-esque invulnerability... by diving into a vat of molten steel. Which, of course would be sufficiently heated that you'd liquify your flesh before you ever made contact. Actually I'll include a picture of that because it's great.

F2GxjkR.jpg

https://comicbookplus.com/?cid=1507

 

 

2 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Huh, I did not know of that story. That's actually pretty interesting.

So what's the connection to pumpkins?

 

I'm actually not sure beyond the Jack O'Lantern taking it's name from the myth.

2 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

*Looks it up*

Yeah, I can see how that can be considered scarier. I do not blame you in the slightest.


Back in high school I had two incidents I assume were sleep paralysis. The former, I woke up to these strange inhuman figures in my room. I can't give a good description because of the darkness, but a voice in my mind told me "go back to sleep", and when I failed to instantly comply I felt a shock through my body not different from being zapped with one of those trick pens.

The second incident was a little stranger, because it involved this unusual woman-thing (while it looked human my mind screamed it was a succubus due to the purple glow it gave off). When it tried to force itself on me, if you get my meaning, I overcame the paralysis to stab it in the chest with the knife I kept in my bedframe (due to a phobia of burglars), and kicked it off as I sat up. It tore what I'd describe as a portal (though to what I couldn't see, whatever was on the other side just emitted that same purple glow, but stronger) in the back of my door and disappeared through it. I've tried to write it off as sleep paralysis hallucinations or a dream ever since... but there's two issues. That door is typically left open, but it was definitely shut now (a feat considering it doesn't shut properly unless you put some force to it), and the knife in question was now absent from my bedframe. To this day, over a decade hence, I have never found it again. Funny that.

 

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

U5areb5h oGirl, bring out my old sword and armor so I can give them to my son. It's time you stopped playing archer and took up a real weapon for once.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnThey won't be necessary.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnIn truth, I never wanted to become a sea captain. Or an admiral Or even an adventurer.

U5areb5h oWhat?!?

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnI wanna be a plane!

"The smell of fresh exhaust fumes, the crash of the sound barrier, and with my co-pilot by my side, we'd sing, sing, sing".
I'd do a lumberjack song parody, but honestly any punchline would amount to the obvious (Holmes is an idiot).

 

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:
On 6/18/2019 at 10:03 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Vikings who want to go to Vahalla, people wanting to die knowing the limits of their strength, Eugen...

Eugen confirmed for Viking. Hence why he's so SAVAGE.

 

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

I love (naratively anyway) the comparisons and contrasts between these Holmes and Runans promotions and speeches. Really does seem like they're two sides of the same coin here.

Also, that was a great speech. Looks like Runan actually has some points in Charisma (and Intelligence, but we knew that already).

Does that coin happen to be a silver dollar belonging to one Harvey Dent? Because one side of that coin is definitely looking a lot worse than the other.

 

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

Guess it's Arkis's turn to be the punching bag. And for people to turn his own words on him.

Are we certain that Arkis isn't a half-brother to Holmes?

Well, if Attrom is... we've got a possible filler for that ending that's broken without him.

 

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

This is either a hilarious coincidence, or Kaga saw into the future, knew that a kid would love both butter and Arkis, and decided to make him a sucky unit out of pure spite.

Plot twist. Kaga's a time traveller. That's how he does everything first.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Part 58 - Possibly the most broken update thus far.

All right! I just finished Thracia 776.

https://images2.imgbox.com/b5/80/FeNQqabF_o.png

I also just got to Chapter 10 of Thracia 776. Again. Well, I can't say I didn't like it, that's for sure! I'll take the bad route this time, and see what's so bad about it.

Anyway, I really liked the game. I even had fun recruiting Xavier! Without the sleep sword! Can you believe it?!

I liked most of the maps. The gaidens are evil, but still, about half of them are still fun. The difficulty, contrary to popular belief, is not that high, due to enemies being rather weak. It's mostly bullshit mechanics that screw you over if you don't know they're coming - which, admittedly, is crap (still don't forgive the time 8 Sorcerers spawned on top of Dagdar), but it does ensure that, on a second playthrough, the enjoyment of the game grows that much higher. Capturing really changes how things work, and the fact that literally everyone can be used thanks to scrolls and universal 20 caps is extremely good for someone like me, who likes having variety in FE. Case in point, my best unit from the last run.

Mc2vgjoy o

This guy. After Brighton died, I came to terms with the fact that I wasn't going to have an Axe Knight. I didn't like this dude's design or his sprite, so I didn't intend to use him at first. However, in the chapter after Hicks joined, there were a bunch of Cavaliers pursuing Leif's army. Having no other axe users than the really awful Knight, I was basically forced to use Hicks. His performance in that one chapter impressed me so much, I decided I'd use him after all. And boy, was he ever a great unit. No scrolls involved, either: the only one I ever gave him was the Od scroll, which only increases the skill growth by 30% and does nothing else (well it does block critical hits, but that's something all the scrolls do). And if you think that's impressive, I took this screenshot before the final chapter - by the time Veld fell (by the way, I feel he's a liiiiiil bit underrated. He's awful, but he's more of a threat than Idoun. Also, he has the best final boss theme for whatever reason), he had capped speed and defense as well.

Goodspeed, you magnificent fucking man.

Other highlights from the run include Salem, who capped all offensive stats, had 40 HP by the end of the midgame, 14 defense at the end of the game, A dark and Vantage to erase his enemies before they could even try him, and the worst's worst hairdo; Cyas, whose new name is ugly as ass and who's also sorely underrated (no, I did not wish at any point that I had Sety. Why get one demigod when I can take my other demigods closer to being actual gods?); and Leif, who was, against all odds, a great combat unit. I'm so proud of my entire team, and overall, I really enjoyed myself with the game.

There were a couple of snags along the way, though. Crit-happy ballistae are the main one. By God, Kaga, was there really any need to put a thousand of those everywhere? When I successfully beat chapter 22 without warpskipping (I even killed Reinhardt! With Leif!), only to watch Salem get hit critically to death at the very end, I nearly lost the will to continue. That's fucking bullshit. Sure, you can sorta fix it with scrolls (which double as crit-canceling items), but there's not always one for everyone. Also, there were a few too many chapters that seemed to encourage warpskipping as the right way to play. It was not like Shadow Dragon, where there's no obvious drawback to it, but none to not warpskipping either. In Thracia's lategame (particularly in chapter 22), it seemed as though everything was set in order to force me to warpskip. They couldn't make me, but by God was it awful.

Still, overall, really enjoyable experience. It helped that I didn't go in entirely blind, since I already knew the more infamous crap from all my years as a FE fan. I can't imagine myself finding most gaidens without prior knowledge.

Rvu7k8ls o

In this second run, I've decided to challenge myself to using the Knight, a strong contender for the second-worst Knight in the entire series (Wendy's unbeatable, I'm afraid), in a game that hates Knights. I'll still recruit Xavier, because how could I not, but damn. That's a man I can get behind. Thanks, every scroll available in the earlygame!

That's enough of Thracia for now, though. On to Kaga's other outing, where Knights are still bad and I still use them.

Seriously, this update:

Spoiler
On 6/18/2019 at 4:17 PM, BrightBow said:

It's remarkable how well that scene resonates with Arkis being such a poor unit. It's like he was supposed to be shitty. And hey, there is even a shop you can put Arkis in.
I put my money on that whole scene just skipping if Lena dies after recruiting Arkis. Gonna have to try that out on my next run. This seems like a good thing to use the Save Staff for.

I actually went out of my way and tried all possible outcomes (Lina dies, Arkis dies, both Lina and Arkis die). The results were... a little disappointing, but eh. Check them out at the end of the update.

Since we are not going to see Krishnea in the tower, maybe now I could explain the issue that I brought up about Krishnea holding a Thunder Sword when she leaves the party.
When we would see Krishnea again, it would be in one of the floors of the tower as an NPC, who supposedly got herself injured and can't move. Since she is alone inside a locked room, she should in theory be save until you reach her.
Unfortunately the game doesn't actually prevent her from moving. And unlike every other character leaving the party, she keeps her items. So if she has a Thunder Sword, she will try to attack over the walls and put herself in range of the enemies. And the enemies in the tower are statistically tough. They may wreck her before you get the opportunity to get out the Physics.

Ah, I see. To be fair, my Krishna was trained, so she would've had an easier time than most Krishnas, but still.

It's unfortunate that she of all people doesn't follow the usual rules of people leaving the party. I suppose the reason she gets to keep her weapons is because she is practically never actually gone. She would only leave at the end of the previous map and would be back before the end of this series of random battles. And getting her back should be a foregone conclusion, since you have to talk to her with Shigen, who always has to be deployed and is not allowed to die.

I'd argue that her leaving with all her items fits her character. She's a thief, after all. Makes sense that someone like her would go "eh, sure they won't miss these, I'll probably need 'em more than them".

Also, you don't recruit her with Shigen, but with Holmes. More on that later.

 

On 6/18/2019 at 6:04 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

What are you talking about? I'm right there in Team 4.
Ahah, right.

@Pengaius is suddenly straight for Arkis.

Who could've foreseen that?!

Lentzenheimer probably is the type where consent is a turn-off. Yes, the implication there is intentional. He's scum.

I mean, remember the time he was out searching for cheap prostitutes? Maybe it wasn't prostitutes that he wanted. Urgh... glad I cut his eyes, his arm and his throat.

This is art.

I agree completely.

This was the crowning achievement of the brilliant dumbass' life.

Yes, considering he died five minutes later.

I stand corrected. This is art.

Hahahahahahah, yeah, I almost choked to death laughing at that. What even were the chances of that happening?

*All the readers except me, Hawkwing and Butterman. Because I'm dead because go figure carrying three litres of water everywhere wasn't enough.

Maybe you saw your girlfriend laughing maniacally, standing over Sasha's corpse, and felt life was meaningless, so you stopped drinking?

Yeah well, look at how ridiculous this time line got.

Too much. Then again, the actual timeline ain't that different, with all my units dying to 1%s...

Up until he killed Dougy, I imagine you would have preferred Arkis winning to the Horseman.

I'll be entirely forthcoming with you: I was hoping they'd both bite it.

Honestly, I just felt like referencing that guy, given last year it used to be inane top tens/"x is a rip-off of y" threads until inevitably he forced the ban with the very post you quoted. Besides, you brought it to mind with "master race" talk. Mind you, every time I hear "hobbits" that thread pops into mind these days (given they were one of the fictional races listed)

Ah, I understand.

Well, not complaining. You gave me the chance to talk about Berwick again.

There's an incredible meta-joke to a list of jokes not containing General Lawrence when his absence in game is what caused the joke in the first place. Doubly so when it was unintended.

It's like, the guy's an absolute mystery. Mentioned in passing by Richard, most people would've forgotten about him by now. But not me. I'm always on the lookout for potential General Lawrences.

...even though I often forget about the joke, myself... it's like, General Lawrence's superpower is to make people forget about him!

Yeah, I'm thinking you just got the help group for "ex-minions of brilliant dumbasses" by mistake. Or perhaps the "Four Horsemen" club in hell, which is kind of like a biker's gang, but with Horsemen, and in hell. And the name's a lie because there's more than 4 of them.

Or maybe it's the Navarre + Clarine club. It's Navarre, Rutger, Clarine, and Vega's happiness. They have the stereotypical dart board with my face on it.

Navarres and Clarine: Very Edgy Team

Avrkxcwh o

Yeah, but I couldn't not make a joke about the fact there was an outlaw by the name of Richard Barter who went by the alias "Rattlesnake Dick".

Rattlesnake Richard.

Lehph8nb o

Hahahahahahahah, nah, I doubt Norton would be like that. He's not an arrogant dickhead. He's just Rock Solid.

Eugen succeeds, but Arkis isn't using his head anyway, so you don't lose a unit.
Pffffft. Okay, I was not expecting that. Thank you.

Is Kaga low key having a dig at what he did with Abel and Est?

Probably. Or maybe it's a small liberty by Aethin, referencing exactly that. I suppose he'll enlighten us, if he can.

Or is the intended use for Lina and Arkis as the shopkeeps?
Doubt it. We'll see why in the future.

Little harsh... on Lina anyway.
Yeah, you're right. She doesn't deserve to die because of her stupid fiance.

Kaga does it first: Pengauis jokes edition.

Kaga truly does everything first. One of these days, I'll find out that he also played through his games while roasting himself first.

I've got my suggestion in my name. It's not changing. He's not been dead long, so issues with level shouldn't be as severe as with someone like Attrom, Sharon or Juliatisnacordst who died earlier and Mel would probably appreciate it. Lionel would also be a solid candidate, but his name's not as fun, and as you said... he had started to be average. Having addressed the competition I believe my argument is solid (after all, you've established Krishna and Letena, Indiana Jones is immune for some reason, and Lee is safeLee in the army in this route)

Very well, duly noted.

 

On 6/18/2019 at 8:20 PM, eclipse said:

Since Plum finally met dad, I'm nominating Lionel.  Assuming Lina and Arkis get married, he can forcefully invite himself to the wedding by reminding them that he died for their sake.  And then he can eat all the food or something.

Hahahahahahah, hey, I think he'd probably have more fun haunting them as a ghost.

That being said, this is one heck of a shitty situation. It's screw over Mel by reviving Lionel, or screw over Norton and Lionel's offscreen family by reviving The Roger. Ah, fuck. Choices, choices...

Also, badassness is like talent - it can exist within a person, but in order to truly shine, it must be honed.  I suspect Kreiss' grandpa gave Eugen a few pointers in his younger days!

Hwahahahah, I can totally see that. The quip at Arkis was godly, Eugen tier.

 

On 6/19/2019 at 4:09 PM, ranger016 said:

I vote for The Roger, because most of the late game maps are indoor so Lionel would be a bit more useful there..

Makes sense-- wait, wait, hold your horses! You make a solid case for Lionel, but then vote for The Roger? What's up with th--

Oh, right. All my readers want my death. I almost forgot.

 

3 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

5cb9146756990_CantcommentonLP.png.015ea44bb42137aeccf132c9893fbe3a.png

I knew it was a good idea to go to sleep instead of rushing the proofreading!

Huh, I did not know of that story. That's actually pretty interesting.

So what's the connection to pumpkins?

I can answer that: you know the reason he was "too wicked to go to Heaven"? It's because he enjoyed pumping his kin in his free time.

...

...

...please forgive me.

I am both honored and concerned about getting my own character slot.

You got killed by Arkis. I'd be concerned all right.

Was Arkis being a girl intentional or did you forget to change the gender?

Ahah... what do you think?

It's a genius name that works regardless of context.

Indeed.

Reminds me of the first time I did the Hunger games simulation. I chose Blustone characters, and there were coincidences that I couldn't make up if I tried. That reminds me that I actually thought about posting the highlights as a FftF topic, but that happened around a month ago. Might get to it when erratic posting gets to it.

How does a horseman scaring me off remind you of Blustone? Are we playable characters in that game too? Is the horseman a hard counter for me?

Or He's Eugen in the timeline where he was elected president, and put into practice the belief that everyone should die in battle.

Hwahahahahah, I can just imagine the exchange.

Cyvsoplb o P-Please, sire! I've done nothin' wrong!

Ih49ob2i oThat's right you haven't. Now, you must kill me, so I can die a knight's death!

Cyvsoplb o...what?

Ih49ob2i oGo on, take this sword! Right in the heart!

Cyvsoplb o...but I don't... I don't think I...

Ih49ob2i oDo it, or I'll kill you!

Cyvsoplb o A-Ah! All right, all right!

An important rule of combat: Always observe and use the environment.

And maybe don't have knife fights near cliffs.

Stop being all grandiose and go and kill Arkis! Arkis!

He never was.

And Indy's name continues to produce hilarious results.

There was no reason to die, that's why he didn't.

Looks like their fates were joined.

Maerchen and Lentzenheimer? A match made in Hell, that one.

Mel entered the Oregon Trail by accident, and forgot to rest for 4 days.

I also thought of Oregon Trail when everyone started to die of dysentery of all things.

Well, I strangled him for no reason at all.

And I hate you for it.

In truth, it was to prove that I was the superior player of The Emperors Tomb.

Superior to... the game's titular character? Okay.

I looked at the code you linked at the end. Turns out, I was actually quite diplomatic throughout most of the game. Guess I failed my speech roll at a critical point.

Yeah, you were pretty peaceful until you started to murder everyone. Also, I wasn't joking when I said The Roger did nothing at all. Say what you will, but he at least didn't betray his morals. Unlike Mel...

That's a sentence I never expected to read.

This whole thing is gold.

Ahah, right? I wasn't expecting it to be so good when I started.

Maybe Runan was so lost in his imagination about how gorily Arkis would die that he forgot how to set the mine?

I can imagine that.

Welp. Guess that was a thing.

On the bright side, maybe this will make it up to Butterman after Arkis failed to level up.

Speaking of the devil, he hasn't replied. In fact, half the normal repliers vanished in this update, until you made it back in the last minute. I wonder what's up with that.

I'm just happy that the door is open for Lords to have beards in their own game. Within time, we'll reach the point where the phrase "it looks like a bear crawled onto his chin and died" will appropriately describe an FE character!

Ward.

Still, yeah. It'd be great to have Ward in mainline FEs. Or Eugen. I don't know who I'd want more, they're both amazing...

If they're a bright spot in this, it's that the menus look great, you can finally free roam the battle maps, and the next game will probably be a significant improvement in this area.

Yes, I agree with the menus. Although, I still feel Shadow Dragon's menus are nicer to look at.

Several things:

- How did you make that a gif?

gifmaker.me. Basically inserted a bunch of frames that were the drawing, and one that was the subliminal message, and then adjusted the speed of the GIF so the message would be readable.

- You thought you were subtle, but I saw through your trickery! You want us to play Berwick Saga!

Urgh! Lord Kaga... please forgive me...

- The sun joke is great.

Hahah, thanks.

- I hope you have soft shoes or a safety net or something down there for the cat to safely land on.

What? I totally caught it! Can't you see?

- No wonder you lost control of casting spells. Your hands and arms are in the middle of your torso, and they don't have any fingers or opposable thumbs.

Actually, the darker green thing is a cape, so my arms are coming out from under the cape. Ergh... in the middle of my torso, yes. And the fingers are because I'm bad at drawing.

I looked it up, and now I'm wondering if I've seen it before. Nothing more than part of a single episode, but the combination of 2D and 3D animation, and having there be both a real world and a computer world, seems very familiar to me. I don't remember where or when I first saw it, either, but thanks for jogging my memory for something that happened over a decade back.

I can believe that, it had a very memorable style to it.

Maybe I'm just so conditioned to seeing anime characters with ridiculous hair that I no longer notice.

I guess, but even as far as anime goes, Wolf is really anime. Doesn't help that he's in the DSFE games, which have semi-realistic designs... and then there's him.

Depends on the game, honestly. Sometimes, it works well. Sometimes, it works very well. Other times, well...

What do you mean, "Well..."? That's the best scene of them all!

Didn't you say that I could use it free of charge earlier?

Yeah, I was just amazed by your speed.

The idea came the moment I saw the name.

Besides, I need more practice on Paint.net anyway.

Oh, well. I'll forgive you.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

LECBrZP2g0POviNVXKDWo7EKmDIZvBQgvcenzYGejYhZbqsItRsV0sWeMl8DWj5VJmsq6MRmiH9s4yySaIdtoBLBWkKyI4aCnPvVeVkaYwXrIsV6VmlkVLDDEkP5E3ACr9NPj77h

 

fqJx_13j_91LfIaWK3aF5N8e1uDisv_gmXvD5mY-q6at_-vP-5cuZ3psaqkoqWZwVGPVT96bsrffIGLy7g38Pxy0rwV88MLCgZgLbamzQRDeusP1gELhG5j4mzNmiRqKAWzjM53g

I range in how creative I am with the names.

Light spoilers for a joke I'll do a short scroll down.

Hahah, well, if it makes you feel better, I'm not much better at it.

The Faye joke was about how mercenaries promote into myrmidons in Echoes, yet despite being a villager, she can't become one.

Ah, I see.

As for Marcel, okay then, what is the non-metal cloth that is hanging around their waist that extend to past their knees?

Well...

Wait, "their"? He's clearly a man!

And the blue cloth is obviously a cape!

Actually...

Ahahahah... okay, that was hilariously stupid of the main character.

Since it's later...

U5areb5h oGirl, bring out my old sword and armor so I can give them to my son. It's time you stopped playing archer and took up a real weapon for once.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnThey won't be necessary.

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnIn truth, I never wanted to become a sea captain. Or an admiral Or even an adventurer.

U5areb5h oWhat?!?

ITs79gL97ym0gMq2s6aobw5y5wBumeWhRE2vj0GMgYCuWq503_VXZW6Oiy0kZBLulpeerUV8TNN7s3BnCe-Z3XtV0F53iVOMHFVSFfjkNh9_fpv5_lpi3dSQrGwKYW-0ol7_0hfnI wanna be a plane!

LtIoLSD7jjVM2Cbmr82yGrlDG3qpBMMzS_lyvu2ih12Ay6f-XhMYNb6IYex75JZXIf99UnC2oViXqj1AfQ8y-6Xl6C4p-brsTW26I_1e1nI-SY1fv7r7N73AcR5tlHPYwSTzMohO

fcflsoHngxZziYZ1zxhF1KJ9CjhTOA2wJDZr9aDP2dBkfB7b4iPnq4dhfRmr9kP719PH3tlgyabq9hdNYxkJ1AVM0no6zH7IulD7qFQvnbT9FaUEeE3bX5s975KmX9ldxIAC3VQc

Oh my god.

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BWHAAAAAT?!?!

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1B...
zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BI spent my whole life... learning how to fly...

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BAnd then this dastard becomes a Stealth Hunter without even trying!

zr4fMEjUa6yGHmJfrOSwqJasDoURiMmV42i_yog-Eof-tJpRmerQ-7egUpcJrk0xOt62yWto-_7KVftwUZE-m8pqrWORJvO2tVOoobgFJLInYvpvQjsdWO2btkbXdHh4y6KSrf1BWhy did you promote me, Ruben?!

f_VoSudK1lleXpsH0-ODc3c-pWPDk4VmT5emHpQvK967UDbBpc2gn7njN71vKCUkldq40H5Fkq3iEsyf5cZ3C_0-JM1-O-Eay2ghCo62o3X7WrZEbAPl9bxfhjGSq-Mjv4byfnGfHey, I held a funeral for your plane pose! And it was either a promotion or you joined the bench alongside Alician!

Hahahahaha... I love how you used my evil version. Of course, I haven't released the others. I probably should, shouldn't I.

It's honestly a shame that the OVA isn't referenced more in the series itself. Sure, I don't want it to acknowledge memes to the point it distracts from supports and story moments, but throwing this dog a few more bones would be nice to see.

To be fair, they probably forgot about it, like the entire world until the memes.

It is extremely difficult yet somehow possible to picture such a thing existing.

My brain hurts, I should probably stop trying.

I'd beg to differ..., but yeah. That would really only work in a weird and creepy series where body horror and grotesque things are common.

EEXXXELENTCH

EEUUGH

Yeah that about sums it up.

This is one of those moments where I forgot to think the entire joke through.

Gee, really?

Lets just say that I learned the hard way that I should take TV Tropes seriously when they say that a single trope is very constant, that I should really stop looking up random games online, and that a plot being interesting and the things you can do in it can be two very different things.

Thankfully, I stockpiled a lot of brain bleach.

...okay? I get it, I think?

Speaking of which, how's the gameplay of Thracia? I know that you've talked about the game before, but I'm curious on your thoughts about the unique mechanics and difficulty and the like.

See above.

Fair point. Being preoccupied with classes and job searching doesn't help.

Ah, I'm sorry.

Right. ...Man, I need to check these things again. I mean, I did a few days ago when rereading past updates, but still.

Hey, don't worry about it. It's all right.

I know. But it's fun to joke about when in still-frame.

Okay, but spare me some mad rants, then.

1/5 "I can tell it's an arrow".

Hahahahah, well, it's better than the map animations. Arrows are just white lines there.

Really? Then why does... Eteth...Enteh, right? Have a long dress?

She's a Shaman, not a Cleric. Also, yes, you got her name right.

Magic; The plot device that mends plot holes as easily as it creates them.

Just behind God in the scale of convenient things.

Vikings who want to go to Vahalla, people wanting to die knowing the limits of their strength, Eugen...

Pfffhwahahahahahah, I love how you specified Eugen. Because he has no reason at all to die in battle, he just feels like it.

I have/shall!

Good!

Or his eye was chapped up, but still intact?

Those are contradictory statements, ain't they?

I've heard about someone getting a paper cut in their eye before, so it's not too far fetched.

Well, when I was younger, me and my dad were in a pool, and my dad had the bright idea to dive up to me and scare me.

I panicked, kicked him in the face and somehow managed to slash his eye with my toenail. We spent the remainder of the holidays in the hospital. He never tried going in a pool with me again.

Incidentally, when I was even younger (maybe 6?), I had a swimming teacher that was fond of picking up children and throwing them into the pool like rocks. I hated that, so when the man tried it, I somehow managed to grab on to his finger. The finger went pop, and the teacher never tried to throw me into the pool ever again.

I've... a problematic record when it comes to pools.

Right. I believe we saw that animation before.

Probably from an enemy Thief.

Right.

Well, still goes to Garo. Tom has Ballista and bow options.

Oki-dokie, duly noted.

That's the problem with Morgans. They can blend in together if you don't pay attention.

Hahah, yes.

I looked back, and you are right that she has very limited availability and usefulness.

I feel like I'm missing something about her having to die, though.

I want Kreiss to have a happy ending with her, which is only possible by skipping the event where she leaves the army and tries to convince Kreiss to do the same. How do I do that? Simple: by murdering her and bringing her back for the ending. I know, that's awful, but still. I broke my back ten times over trying to get Kreiss laid, by God I'm gonna get him laid.

Except the slaver.

Ahahah, right.

"I mean, somebody has to take the money away from evil overlords."- Golgotha

Doing God's work right there.

Nah, I mean Julia killing him with absolutely no effort.

That's the best way to end it!

Even better! Add an extra Dead!

There were many deads for Lentzie that day.

The moment I saw that his arm was missing, I knew I had to put that joke somewhere.

I'm glad you did.

We all are.

Except for Pengaius.

He'd karate chop Arkis's head off if needbe.

I can see that.

A few sentances in and this is already rivaling Eugen punching Holmes.

Hahahahah, yes it is.

Runan would probably intervene. He probably thinks enough blood was spilled regaining their home, and killing even a deserted soldier isn't worth it.

Well... more on that later.

The small detail about his sword being unsheathed adds so much.

Yeah, you can tell he was eager to get his hands bloodied.

He would, but it seems that this grumpy shopkeeper bought it first. To bad he didn't learn his lesson in patience.

Hahahah, poor Arkis.

Also, insert *If words could do damage, Eugen would break the game* jokes.

I'd make a counter for Eugen being a badass, but there aren't enough numbers in the universe to represent that.

I would not be surprised if Kaga gave Lina crappy growths just to make this joke.

He probably did, the absolute mad lad.

All that's missing is sunglasses and an explosion.

9wi3x9nt o

Promotion time!

Yup!

Except for the swearing you took the words out of my mouth.

Always with the swearing... blast it, man! Holy shasteriskt, stop being so uptight!

I love (naratively anyway) the comparisons and contrasts between these Holmes and Runans promotions and speeches. Really does seem like they're two sides of the same coin here.

Yeah, it's a really nice detail.

Also, that was a great speech. Looks like Runan actually has some points in Charisma (and Intelligence, but we knew that already).

Actually, he gains the skill Charisma when he promotes. As does Holmes. Go figure.

It is a good song I agree.

Of course you do. How could you not?

The Guardians of the Galaxy? The Guardians from the Rise of the Guardians? The 16 Colossi? The Newspaper?

Oh

If you thought that was underwhelming, wait until you get to this update.

Well, Runan's route has Zach disappearing of the face of the planet, but yeah.

Actually, that... that was also in Holmes's route.

I wouldn't be surprised if Kaga learned from these mistake regarding character deaths affecting the story and planned ahead in Berwick Saga.

Probably so, since, while characters talk a lot more than they do in normal FEs, it's all optional chapters, scenes and sidequests, so they can safely skip that stuff if the unit is dead. Good shit, good shit.

Maybe it's an in-universe confusion?

I mean, the Elder Scrolls has books  that intentionally have contradictory facts and events when compared with each other to give the world a sense that something was rewritten for some reason and that just like in real life, you cannot know the full story of events you did not witness.

I guess we'll find out... I hope... I pray...

I'm trying to think of something fancy to say, but it keeps eluding me. I really like Shigens line right here, for some reason.

Thanks.

I suppose they were looking for cannon fodder instead of elite soldiers at the time.

I can just imagine Eugen picking the most pathetic-looking people to sacrifice for the survival of his liege.

Kreiss pulled through. Arkis didn't.

*Beest*

The Lee puns are starting to affect even unrelated things...

What a hilarious typo.

That he was fighting in a war and thus logically couldn't see his fiancee until they were on the same continent.

I love it when you take my retorical questions and answer them literally.

Guess it's Arkis's turn to be the punching bag. And for people to turn his own words on him.

Are we certain that Arkis isn't a half-brother to Holmes?

I mean, it could be, we never meet his mother or his father. It could perfectly be good ol' Valentinus.

This is either a hilarious coincidence, or Kaga saw into the future, knew that a kid would love both butter and Arkis, and decided to make him a sucky unit out of pure spite.

That would be such a... Kaga move!

What's the difference?

If I'm not mistaken, if you go 26A Arkis keeps on hating Lina for being an annoying child (the irony), but if you go 26B, he begins to see her more as a grown woman, and begins actually falling for her.

Well, that explains the cells at least. Outside of Lina, they were kinda just there otherwise.

My idea was to establish the hostages in the conversation with Matthis, but I... kinda forgot. Oh, well.

***

Man, I really shouldn't have put this off for so long. Life got busy, and everytime I sat down and started writing, I realized early on that I wouldn't have time to finish.

Ah, don't worry. It's perfectly fine: it seems that update was cursed or something.

 

45 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

Eugen confirmed for Viking. Hence why he's so SAVAGE.

Sxjywyrp o

Is kinda sad:

Spoiler
Xnmerkuo o

Le plan. That's French for "map", actually. There really isn't any need for any plans in this chapter. What you see is what you get: bunch of ballsacks, bunch of skeletons, couple Ogres, and a lamentable boss that's definitely fallen from grace since the first time we met it, way back in the Caves of Mermel. Contrary what it may first feel like, the Myrmidons aren't our foes this time around.

66cbpszq o

Quite the contrary, Yr's natives will mop the floor with the monsters. Literally the only reason to hurry up is that the Ogres will destroy the unguarded house at the bottom of the map, and, well, we've got Sierra, so...

Cjubzbwn o0ptia8kz oXwxqkpfg o

Yeah. It doesn't matter. This is the most pathetic map since the one map that was just San and Frau being dumbasses, or the one map that was exactly the same except with a bunch of weak generics and Zachariah. Coincidentally, and much like those two maps, this one is also a place that can be entered freely from the world map. This is important, because the houses contain stuff of interest. I won't be visiting them today. I want to save them for after we've climbed to the top of the Tower of Morse, and have revived some units.

Oszso1bv o92hyhaj8 o

That's because these houses teach skills, as well as fun puns. They're one-time deals, but I mean, I'll gladly take one of every single skill in the game. Well, except for Flurry. Don't know what's up with that. Maybe they figured it's too OP. Or maybe it's because the "power of x" pun would be too ridiculous in Flurry's case?

Ekyuhfzf o

For the time being, let's refuse the wise old dude's offer. Sierra has no need for an overhyped skill such as Astra.

Txthxtbb o1dcavojj oBwyyphik o

The first thing that happens is that the Swordfighters fight a few ballsacks with their swords. Killed a couple of 'em, even.

Jxpoywtx o97885jus o32tu4bra o

Then Sierra faces some danger. Emphasis on "some". There isn't much danger to go around. If danger was edible, world hunger would go unresolved.

Xakdpo5a o

Well. Not much else for me to say. This chapter's really just a glorified skirmish. Same deal as Fort Ligria, except this is a chapter because... dunno, guess they wanted to force the player to hear that awesome theme in some way. Can't say I'm opposed to the idea.

Fkc6c1va o

An interesting little tidbit is that, despite having every terrain skill, Tom only gets 3 move in this map. I have no idea why that is.

Texh8go2 o

Half the team's going to be completely useless today.

Csoo0mv0 o

Sierra whips out nosferatu. There's little danger, but I want even fewer risk involved.

Ek2psrf2 o

Hey. Actually usable. I'll take it.

Lln6xwij oP8xvsuvk o0urwoiqa o

The enemies move forward, except the one fighting Sierra, who retreats.

1pqnjo42 o

...and we just keep moving forward. Having fun yet, with this thread that's all about entertainment?

Adrzoyux oN7pswdlk oAiuvefor o

You know, I think I once saw one of these guys die. It was a sad day, but it's not this run, so it is irrelevant at this point in time.

Nu7lg0pg o1dbxb9f1 o

Holmes gets some sword training in. Not bad, for your first fight.

Ziexn70f oDdyijoq3 o

Just for fun, I decided to have Frau do something. She failed.

1rwpvauo o

Sierra dealt with everything as usual.

9khnlz07 o

I want to feed the bosskill to Garo. If it feels like I'm overleveling him, that's because I am. I know he's rammed all of his caps already - be patient, and you'll see.

6n0gq7xy o

This guy decided it was a great idea to go after the boss.

7k9m4571 o

What did you expect?

Yp6m9yll oBn6rwwot oFsioawmm o

Sierra kills some more skeletons.

Kenlqafo oRjijc7p0 o

Oh, hey. He lived. Woo.

Uzjw9i35 o

The Ogres are here. They're the only dangerous part about the map, since they have killer axes and a metric fuckton of strength. Sierra's got reviving items in case things go south, so there's no danger at all.

Idgbbfol oGdlwg7nm o78eflegt o

These fellows only have 4 move, too, so I can just zap the first one, and the other one won't be able to reach the Astral house.

I6frlwmk o

Bad, Sierra. Bad.

Wbqw3sv9 oUjv9cycq oOffr4yr1 o

Okay, good.

Rlawy0ga o

Gee, how scary. I might actually lose my miracle charm.

Pfcwq03i oHzhytmvi o84eypf9m o

Yeah, fool couldn't even do that much. Go home, Ogre, you had your chance to be relevant, and you failed.

4mjgucbw oP89opk3n o

With that out of the way, let's take a look at Holmes's animations. He's still ultra-depressed.

5z2slegz o

...Oi! What're you doing? I only meant to show off your animations!

Aujx0lap o

Well, off he goes. I'll just rewind to give the kill to Garo. You'll forgive this tiny itsy bitsy little cheat, won't you?

3wt7c4qw o

Okay, he's suddenly a hunchback--

Beqdxbh7 oMkds53mf o

BLISTERING BARNACLES! THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE'S DOING?!

Wu4becsk oJz72ir32 o

Well. I've got to hand it to you, Holmes: that was epic.

P2iez5hu o

A shame it ain't canon. Ah, he'll get his chance another day.

Ioy5jjtq o

Getting the stats he still can get. Some skill, mayhap?

Ht6bahmk o

Well, I didn't mean this kind of skill, but okay, sign me right up!

So yeah, this is what I've been hyping up all this time. Starting at level 28 and all the way up to level 31, Garo starts learning skills like a madman. What kind of skills? Wrath, obviously, Flurry, Nihil and Lethality.

Nihil and Lethality are cute bonuses, but... Wrath and Flurry. You know how hilariously good Mintz is thanks to those skills? Now imagine them on a guy who's all capped. Yeah. This is why using Garo is fun, even if it's not the best thing to do. Get him an occult book and a ton of expereince, and maybe the move potion to help that lackluster pace of his (wink wink nudge nudge), and he'll become an absolute force of nature that will break the game in ten tiny pieces - at least!

Utonufhw oSwskrxzs o

That done, I decided to grind Plum up a little bit, in hopes she'd get some magic for better heals. She failed miserably. Well, she managed to gain enough mastery to use the Paces a-Hundred Yet Still I Cure. It could be worse.

Vypmargf o

Let's visit instead of capture. Nice attention to detail, although I wonder if this is on Kaga, or Aethin.

J1rlrhld o

Okay, let me explain myself. Keeping the rewind function on slows down the emulator when I speed things up. Normally I keep it enabled to get better shots of combat and to catch any text that I may've missed (and, admittedly, to correct the occasional missclick). However, when I was dance-grinding Plum, I turned it off so as not to die of terminal boredom. The result is that, when I entered the Tower of Morse, Shigen's line flashed on-screen for a second and then I pressed C by mistake and missed it.

Now, I know this doesn't explain why this is so shitty. It wouldn't have taken me more than a minute to do one of my fake ingame scenes. In fact, it took me longer to do this. But... c'mon, I wanted to let my artistic spirit loose for once! Can you blame me?!

Vklwwyag o

Anyhow, enter Yoda. Does he look like you expected him to? For me, spot on except for the handlebar. I did not see that coming, but I love it.

Gmhhyxnn oHow have things been here while I was away?

Tbmbi8q0 oPretty dull. The Imperial Army attacked a couple of times, but they're just small fries. They came, they fought, they ran away.

Gmhhyxnn oNot surprising. They didn't stand a chance.

X2enb3ok o

P1zzgcas o What's that? You thought this update wouldn't feature Holmes being an idiot because it's a gameplay update without dialogue? Hah! How adorable.

0zfd96rn o They've been talking for exactly 15 seconds (yeah, I timed it), and already Holmes is losing his nerve over literally nothing. If Julia is in this route, Yoda tells her she sucks and teaches her Astra by basically cutting her to ribbons until she has only 1 HP left, in which case I can understand Holmes getting tired of waiting. However, it seems I've managed to find exactly the right things to do in order to completely destroy the coherence of Holmes's route. I'll be honest with you guys: I'll take her confrontation with Lentzenheimer over Holmes being slightly less broken and a mediocre skill any day.

Gmhhyxnn oSorry about that...

0zfd96rn o Sorry about what?! You've been talking for 15 seconds! He's the one who should be sorry!

Gmhhyxnn oYes, we're finished. See you later, Dad. We're going to head out now.

Tbmbi8q0 oWait, Shigen. You drove the Empire out of Granada, right? Then there's no more danger to Yr Village. How about I come along with you?

P1zzgcas o Against all odds, this man is not a Gotoh. Instead, he's joining right here and now. Good, this is good. I'll take you along, Yoda, if nobody has any objections.

04edcfbn oAre you... Are you serious...? I mean, uh...

0zfd96rn o ...May I ask why you have objections, Holmes?

Tbmbi8q0 oSpit it out, Holmes. Do you want me to come or not?

04edcfbn oI-It's all right with me... It's... fine with you too, right, Shigen?

Gmhhyxnn o......

0zfd96rn o I don't understand, what's the problem?

D2bobaae o

Oh, you're just going to cut to the map and not even bother to explain what's Holmes's problem this time around. Well, fine. Two can play at that game - I won't bother talking about Yoda as a unit either. Not today.

...also, yes, that's the end of the update. See the title? I wasn't lying. This has to be the most pathetic update in the entire LP. I hope you enjoyed it. See you next time, when, hopefully, more interesting things will happen. Toddles.

...ah, that's no way to finish the update. You know what? Let's finish with something completely different.

5mvv1ntn o

I was curious as to what happens if Lina dies after recruiting Arkis, so I quickly went back to my 26B save and quickly solo'd the chapter with Norton, Leonie and Runan. While doing so, I found something pretty interesting: there's more than one option for map animations.

Qqgk7cae oLlqqjhb3 oVpgrzdym o

Picking the "stills" option makes this cute little window appear whenever somebody fights. It's basically the same as normal fights, except without any cool transitions or animations. Nifty, I like it.

Akarhdac o

Oh, and what do you know, it appears I was wrong all along. This dude doesn't escape to the north. Instead, he's heading back into the castle. Strange, I could've sworn he ran away the same turn he got the potion. Oh, well, whatever. It still would've been too cumbersome to get the move potion from him, since I would've had to keep him trapped while simultaneously fending off the Gerxel lancers and dodging arbalest bolts.

Fyobvphz o5w7fne2z o

For once, the non-canon run didn't make me angry. All the levels were awful, so I wasn't left wishing this was what actually happened. Norton did get a point of speed, but I'll take a point of strength over that for him.

P97y8wfy o

Since we're here, let's test out all the potential scenarios. First, what would've happened if Arkis went and fought Lentzenheimer like he said he would.

Qlqvqs90 o4api9mgu o

Surprisingly little death on Arkis's part happened. Interesting.

U7sb9klt o

Now watch your girlfriend die instead.

C26s17zc o

Ahahah! What a story, Lina.

Gwje8adv o

In this case, what happens is that...

Qclgmdcx o

...the game skips everything. Of course. Well, it's LP canon that Eugen just quietly decapitated Arkis while Runan talked to the old guy.

Iqmszjme oUr42td2a o8wnhiw6l o

Oki-dokie, let's check what'd happen if Arkis fell to Lentzenheimer's blade instead.

Pqhcrgut o

Sadly, not the canon end for you. How I wish this were the canon ending for you. Killed by the game's most pathetic major villain. You do not deserve the honor of being executed - or even just threatened - by Eugen.

Zcvhtm10 oCqmlntvf o

I just wanted to show off Norton tanking a critical hit from Lukuud like it's nobody's business.

Luy2nsx3 oU3wtkz4d o

In this case, something actually happens!

Um606rva oYes, I saw... She was weeping, saying that Arkis was only trying to protect her... Has she calmed down a bit?

Ih49ob2i oIndeed she has, milord. What's more, she says she wants to join our forces and fight in Arkis's place to regain his lost honor.

Um606rva oI don't know about that... Isn't she a bit too young?

Ih49ob2i oShe's certainly on the green side,

0zfd96rn o Ba dum tssss...

Ih49ob2i obut I did happen to catch a glimpse of her skill during the battle earlier.

0zfd96rn o She didn't swing her sword a single time, Eugen. What drugs are you on?

K87gtehn o

4lt3brpp o ...whatever it is, it's potent.

Um606rva oI'll trust your judgment, then. Just warn her to stay off the front lines for the time being.

Ih49ob2i oOf course, Lord Runan. I'm sure she'll make an excellent knight.

0zfd96rn o Tragic. I liked it better when they both survived. Sure, Arkis lived on and all, but... man, that was one awesome scene.

U0exmfqa oE1em0cop o

One last possible scenario: they both bite the dust.

9ojakrn8 oJ3wczbum o5cuyeczh o

Skip. Okay, I wasn't expecting anything more.

D2bobaae o

Back to the present, now.

Well... that was still an awfully uneventful update, but eh. At least we got to see Norton tanking a crit from the Lukuud, and Arkis dying. That's something. Next time, we climb the Tower of Morse. See you then.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Z5updt5a o
 
Nhpag8mt o
 
Dhqiio75 o
 
Ecb3wijl o
 
Rbukru63 o
 
Aygxgsjh o
 
Hu42cdns o

Jy60qu9p o

Cus3k7h3 o
 
Fblaasgq o
 
9fm6fr0b o
 
So8msvqh o
 
Vjln23oz o
 
Xlovtet2 o
 
Qwphpyce o
 
Ioxfzy7w o
 
Vbslthhz o
 
Rv1gqnxu o

 

 

 

Zg5wptr7 o
 
Ipzap11u o
 
Gwvivb9n o
 
Iajnfhjg o
 
Tmhz3qwe o
 
7nrlvafz o
 
Dkwimcp6 o

 

 

 

 

 

To be continued.

Death count: Attrom
                        Juliattisnacordst
                        Sharon
                        Krishna
                        Indiana Jones
                        Lee

                        The Roger The Paladin
                        Lionel
                        Letena

*26A only

Reset count: 2 (Runan: 1 - Katri: 1)

Dullahan's done with my incompetence: 7

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Figures. The game generally isn't one for tiny variations in scenes. It's all or nothing.

Anyway, I would imagine that Holmes was just very intimidated by having someone as powerful and experienced as Yoda under his command.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

29 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sxjywyrp o

It suits him.

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Beqdxbh7 oMkds53mf o

BLISTERING BARNACLES! THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE'S DOING?!

Wu4becsk oJz72ir32 o

Well. I've got to hand it to you, Holmes: that was epic.

When you go from never having used a sword to that in between battles, you have to wonder why he was using a bow to begin with.
 

37 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Vklwwyag o

Anyhow, enter Yoda. Does he look like you expected him to? For me, spot on except for the handlebar. I did not see that coming, but I love it.

Looks to me like Mycen's long lost brother.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Vbslthhz o

Wait... that Morgan is the real Morgan? What a twist! It all makes sense now. You set this up ever since starting to use Morgan clones right back last LP so we would be used to Morgans being no one important. And here we are. The original Morgan. Well, I see what you meant about the other thing way back when I joked about Martel coming back for vengeance.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

So long story short, I visited my grandmother yesterday, and we met at a pizza transit place that had some 80's merchandise about. Anyway, there was an arcade cabinet that had a lot of 80's arcade games on it, and best of all it was free! I played 1943 out of curiosity, had a fun time (the music is simple yet awesome!), and saw this:

0Tq9bDaysH3y30IJJPl6szd6OmmcbEu2NCMLb4YMXq7z3N_IW7fdev-UnbjF27_3g2nEAXUQEHfe5_labKFDdef9_mrwM0ddkrB3bsHIo7ML2X_02lKldO6fiKEOH14vcKDzA62U

I know it's a historical name, but make of that what you will.

On 6/22/2019 at 6:07 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Of course. This site is entirely dedicated to containing all those Golden Age/Silver Age stories from comics that have had the trademark lapse. My personal favourite is the "Steel Sterling" origin from Zip Comics (also by Charles Biro), where the protagonist gets Superman-esque invulnerability... by diving into a vat of molten steel. Which, of course would be sufficiently heated that you'd liquify your flesh before you ever made contact. Actually I'll include a picture of that because it's great.

F2GxjkR.jpg

https://comicbookplus.com/?cid=1507

Ah, back when we didn't know that radiation had no positive affects and when it was easy to hide that certain types of science were unrealistic. For better and worse, you can't get away with that kind of stuff nowadays.

Thanks for the link. I'll definitely be looking through it.

On 6/22/2019 at 6:07 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Back in high school I had two incidents I assume were sleep paralysis. The former, I woke up to these strange inhuman figures in my room. I can't give a good description because of the darkness, but a voice in my mind told me "go back to sleep", and when I failed to instantly comply I felt a shock through my body not different from being zapped with one of those trick pens.

The second incident was a little stranger, because it involved this unusual woman-thing (while it looked human my mind screamed it was a succubus due to the purple glow it gave off). When it tried to force itself on me, if you get my meaning, I overcame the paralysis to stab it in the chest with the knife I kept in my bedframe (due to a phobia of burglars), and kicked it off as I sat up. It tore what I'd describe as a portal (though to what I couldn't see, whatever was on the other side just emitted that same purple glow, but stronger) in the back of my door and disappeared through it. I've tried to write it off as sleep paralysis hallucinations or a dream ever since... but there's two issues. That door is typically left open, but it was definitely shut now (a feat considering it doesn't shut properly unless you put some force to it), and the knife in question was now absent from my bedframe. To this day, over a decade hence, I have never found it again. Funny that.

Hmmmm.... Interesting.

I may need to do research into sleep paralysis, to see what other kinds of stories there are.

On 6/22/2019 at 6:07 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Does that coin happen to be a silver dollar belonging to one Harvey Dent? Because one side of that coin is definitely looking a lot worse than the other.

Possibly. Is there now a theory that Runan and Holmes promotions somehow caused Harvey Dent's coin to be marred in some kind of crossover butterfly effect?

On 6/22/2019 at 6:07 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Plot twist. Kaga's a time traveller. That's how he does everything first.

That... makes a concerning amount of sense.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

The difficulty, contrary to popular belief, is not that high, due to enemies being rather weak. It's mostly bullshit mechanics that screw you over if you don't know they're coming - which, admittedly, is crap (still don't forgive the time 8 Sorcerers spawned on top of Dagdar), but it does ensure that, on a second playthrough, the enjoyment of the game grows that much higher.

I remember hearing before that the enemies in Thracia are actually pretty weak. While I'm impressed that the game doesn't go the "give enemies higher stats" route for difficulty, I can't say that I'm a fan of them compensating through the mechanics. Thracia is still a game I'd like to try out someday, but being honest I'm not a big fan of stamina mechanics in a majority of games , and Thracia 776 doesn't sound like it will be an exception. I also have concerns about staves missing, considering how I tend to be sparse in using healing staves unless I need to (the exception being Echoes, because HP is easy to regain in that game, and recently Awakening, but only after you start getting cash because healing items are reasonably priced). Seeing them in action might change my mind, or it might not.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Capturing really changes how things work, and the fact that literally everyone can be used thanks to scrolls and universal 20 caps is extremely good for someone like me, who likes having variety in FE. Case in point, my best unit from the last run.

From what I can tell, Thracia, Awakening, and Echoes/Gaiden are three games in the series that are best at making everyone viable, even though they accomplish this in different ways.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Avrkxcwh o

Is there any game in this series that you haven't done yet? You're making me wish these will become actual, real life games.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can answer that: you know the reason he was "too wicked to go to Heaven"? It's because he enjoyed pumping his kin in his free time.

Related image

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...please forgive me.

You are forgiven.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahah... what do you think?

... I don't want to know.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

How does a horseman scaring me off remind you of Blustone? Are we playable characters in that game too? Is the horseman a hard counter for me?

No, I mean that the coincidences are hilarious and remind me of the one I did with Blustone. For some of the more obvious jokes and a sneak peak of a shitepost I've been meaning to do for nearly a month now:

Spoiler

Lantern questions his sanity.

Spoiler

sT8HZ5gPX_NuHN1ujTxS6IwjB0NMVXEt0J9YWaDVZy0lf7ggYGYEPafWVpCbs8vGPtqkscQ3bpUYd3_flu5TOl8uQqHE_NWmWkfsK50csbRzIDJ8x45mc-qjCa7FGr8b2l93cK9-

It's for Beyond the Bounds and not Blustone, but eh. It's the same universe and characters.

Tyltyl fishes.

Spoiler

dRhCuiQ4oPxVqNB8pUWP0z9B51R1y3wytfPG5hhf5ODxG2WWcOtJQqIdZsNfDnjVKdeNBLZ-vaUIsukdFLT0ZdTQ5ZopHlWrXRjhVPEL4lgZM_gPifFrGzgBLsFoxyqj8nk6TY2w

 

Lantern, Westfield, and Lapis confront each other, but grab what they want slowly to avoid conflict.

An adventure game protagonist, an NPC, and a level 1 hunter in a gacha game realize their place in the world and decide to act accordingly.

 

Lantern discovers a river.

Being an adventure game protagonist has its perks.

 

Lantern cooks his food before putting his fire out.

The perks of being an adventure game protagonist.

 

Lapis ambushes Lantern and kills him.

The downside of being an adventure game protagonist.

 

Acerola, Gullvieg, and Westfield successfully ambush and kill Random Bandit Dude, Gerard, and Denali.

A healer, a story character that is also playable, and an NPC kill an NPC, a story character that is also playable, and a healer.

 

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Superior to... the game's titular character? Okay.

I remember blanking on my original joke when writing that. I believe I originally intended to say that I slew him to prove that I was his superior in hand-to-hand combat, despite the fact that in real life, I have next to no actual martial arts ability.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, I agree with the menus. Although, I still feel Shadow Dragon's menus are nicer to look at.

Yeah, Shadow Dragons are rather nice to look at.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

gifmaker.me. Basically inserted a bunch of frames that were the drawing, and one that was the subliminal message, and then adjusted the speed of the GIF so the message would be readable.

I see. May have to look at that later.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

What? I totally caught it! Can't you see?

...Define "caught".

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually, the darker green thing is a cape, so my arms are coming out from under the cape. Ergh... in the middle of my torso, yes. And the fingers are because I'm bad at drawing.

I always do wonder how people are able to draw things on a computer and have them turn out nice. Without a drawing tablet, I mean.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can believe that, it had a very memorable style to it.

Somewhat unrelated, but searching up Code Lyoko got me thinking about another show that I also only saw once as a kid outside of my home. It was about this kid that was a bald monk that could wield the power of water but had a vastly different art style from The Last Airbender, so I knew it wasn't that. All I remember from the only episode I saw was that all this dudes friends were captured, one via bag of kidnapping (which, alongside Peter Pan 2: Return to Neverland, traumatized me as a kid and gave me a fear of being kidnapped that way. Thank goodness it's an impractical method and thus rarely seen) by a ninja. The bald monk kid was the only guy to complete this challenge of taking a glass of water across a desert, and then saved his friends.

For the longest time, I had absolutely no idea what the show was called. I believed it was on Cartoon Network, but previous attempts to look it up proved fruitless. Then one lucky day I noticed a trope on TV tropes that I thought used a picture from the show. I thought it was the show that I had seen so many years ago, but certain details and designs threw me off. I also didn't have any luck finding the episode that I had seen all those years ago, but after being refreshed on Code Lyoko and deciding that instead of asking the thread what that show was, I decided I might as well try to find it again. I did a bit more searching, found out that the show was called "Xiaolin Showdown", and after being a bit more specific with the search engine, I even found out the episode! It was called "Royal Rumble", and may have been an important episode because there was a villainous teamup, and apparently I remembered several details incorrectly (I thought a ninja had a snowmobile, but in turns out they were just running fast on the snow, I remembered the haircut of one character but forgot they wore a (cowboy) hat, and I thought one character was a larger jerk than what they actually were), but I was so glad to finally find something that I was questioning since I was a youngling that I didn't care!

This has no relevance to anything. I just wanted to bring up that the last update was released so late partially because of a busy week and partially because I got distracted by the videos I linked, TV Tropes, and finding a show I had not seen in years. By the way, I saw Toy Story 4 today, which is why this reply came out later than planned!

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait, "their"? He's clearly a man!

It's a habit. Partially because I don't give a damn about gender, and partially because I know someone is going to be hounded by SJW's for making that mistake. I have my gripes about the whole issue (namely, that not giving a damn about the differences because they really are insubstantial will solve the problem more easily than providing more choices, which needlessly complicates it), but that's a discussion for elsewhere.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

And the blue cloth is obviously a cape!

*Inhales*

WHAT THE HECK IS THE WHITE CLOTH THAT I SPECIFICALLY SPECIFIED WAS AROUND HIS WAIST?!?!?!

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahah... okay, that was hilariously stupid of the main character.

Holmes was the perfect stand-in.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahaha... I love how you used my evil version. Of course, I haven't released the others. I probably should, shouldn't I.

I forgot where I found that, but yeah, it was the only one available, and I thought it was fitting for the joke.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

EEXXXELENTCH

EEUUGH

Yeah that about sums it up.

Fair point.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gee, really?

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...okay? I get it, I think?

Yeah, I didn't plan on you responding that way, and I didn't think the whole joke through, so...

Spoiler

Yeah, I accidentally walked into a fetish game a few years back. Somehow wandered onto its TV Tropes page, was curious about its plot, somehow didn't give too much thought to the fact that is said that gagging was all over the place, and decided it couldn't hurt to give a look on youtube. Needless to say, I learned the hard way that I should have given more weight to that warning. Still don't know if I just happened to see more story than gameplay tropes, or if the site really was light on mentioning how integral kidnapping is in that game. Especially since the game updated when I looked at it's TV Trope page again later to get an answer to that question, so I don't know if the original was less or as clear about that.

To give credit where it's due, if you remove the gratuitous fanservice, the plot actually was pretty solid. A protagonist having to debate whether they should usurp someone who is a noble and competent ruler but betrayed them in order to gain that position is something I wouldn't mind seeing in a less disturbing context.

I still need to break that habit of looking up games that occasionally sound interesting, though. Thankfully, though those just tended to be weird instead of disturbing.

 

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah, well, it's better than the map animations. Arrows are just white lines there.

0/5 Is that an arrow or a laser from an atari game?

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

She's a Shaman, not a Cleric. Also, yes, you got her name right.

I see.

Unrelated note, but I occasionally forget that some characters are promoted due to the lack of differences between the promoted and unpromoted sprites.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Just behind God in the scale of convenient things.

I don't really see God used much in fiction, honestly. Or at least in that way.

Not hard to see why, though, given that it's hard to use Him without resulting in increased scrutiny from readers and critics alike.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Those are contradictory statements, ain't they?

Not really? You can get get your arm, hand, leg, etc. chopped and slashed to ribbons, but still be attached to your body and be identifiable as an arm. So Lentz's eye could be ripped and in several pieces but still be identified (and maybe function) as an eye.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, when I was younger, me and my dad were in a pool, and my dad had the bright idea to dive up to me and scare me.

I panicked, kicked him in the face and somehow managed to slash his eye with my toenail. We spent the remainder of the holidays in the hospital. He never tried going in a pool with me again.

Incidentally, when I was even younger (maybe 6?), I had a swimming teacher that was fond of picking up children and throwing them into the pool like rocks. I hated that, so when the man tried it, I somehow managed to grab on to his finger. The finger went pop, and the teacher never tried to throw me into the pool ever again.

I've... a problematic record when it comes to pools.

Ouch.

I just remember it taking a while before I was willing to swim in a deep end and dive underwater. I have a hard time holding my breath underwater, mostly because I breath through my nose, and I found out later in my life that I don't have a large lung capacity.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Probably from an enemy Thief.

Thought so.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I want Kreiss to have a happy ending with her, which is only possible by skipping the event where she leaves the army and tries to convince Kreiss to do the same. How do I do that? Simple: by murdering her and bringing her back for the ending. I know, that's awful, but still. I broke my back ten times over trying to get Kreiss laid, by God I'm gonna get him laid.

Watch as Kreiss sufferes a groin attack as retaliation/karma for castrating Maerchen

Seriously, what the heck was Kaga thinking when he wrote this entire sidequest? It started out okay. You had to go out of your way to continue it, but how many other videogames are guilty of that. Then it started taking nosedive after nosedive....

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

That's the best way to end it!

Hence why I said it was the right kind of anticlimax. Lentz didn't deserve a flashy death.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I'd make a counter for Eugen being a badass, but there aren't enough numbers in the universe to represent that.

It may as well be "every time Eugen walks in a room and opens his mouth".

You could maybe make a counter about everytime Eugen fails at tactics, though.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

9wi3x9nt o

On the one hand, I am sad that I didn't see Eugen with sunglasses.

On the other hand, this badassadry more than makes up for it.

I would say that every scene with Eugen deserves having an explosion now, but that would probably do more harm than good for the story.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually, he gains the skill Charisma when he promotes. As does Holmes. Go figure.

Huh, guess my RPG joke was actually relevant.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

If you thought that was underwhelming, wait until you get to this update.

I forgot the Guardians of Ga'Hoole. I take it that none of the enemies in the next update will show a semblance of personality?

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually, that... that was also in Holmes's route.

It was?

...Well, I stand corrected. Runan really doesn't have any glaring issues in it's plot. Aside from the slaver, but that problem is shared between both routes.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Probably so, since, while characters talk a lot more than they do in normal FEs, it's all optional chapters, scenes and sidequests, so they can safely skip that stuff if the unit is dead. Good shit, good shit.

That's a pretty good way of handling it. Probably comes with some snags, but they can be mitigated by planning around them, which I assume Berwick does.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can just imagine Eugen picking the most pathetic-looking people to sacrifice for the survival of his liege.

In other words, Eugen was one of the few people okay with Shadow Dragons Gaiden mechanic.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

If I'm not mistaken, if you go 26A Arkis keeps on hating Lina for being an annoying child (the irony), but if you go 26B, he begins to see her more as a grown woman, and begins actually falling for her.

In other words, Arkis respects her for saving his life.

I can see that.

I can also see Arkis saving himself from that situation if he used the little he had of a brain.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Xnmerkuo o

Le plan. That's French for "map", actually. There really isn't any need for any plans in this chapter. What you see is what you get: bunch of ballsacks, bunch of skeletons, couple Ogres, and a lamentable boss that's definitely fallen from grace since the first time we met it, way back in the Caves of Mermel. Contrary what it may first feel like, the Myrmidons aren't our foes this time around.

So... there's not even any moments for Gaurdians of other media to comment on or for minion misadventures?

Man this level is lame. At least I can say that it visually looks nice.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
66cbpszq o

Quite the contrary, Yr's natives will mop the floor with the monsters. Literally the only reason to hurry up is that the Ogres will destroy the unguarded house at the bottom of the map, and, well, we've got Sierra, so...

There's absolutely no challenge to this map aside from massive RNG screwage, then.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah. It doesn't matter. This is the most pathetic map since the one map that was just San and Frau being dumbasses, or the one map that was exactly the same except with a bunch of weak generics and Zachariah. Coincidentally, and much like those two maps, this one is also a place that can be entered freely from the world map. This is important, because the houses contain stuff of interest. I won't be visiting them today. I want to save them for after we've climbed to the top of the Tower of Morse, and have revived some units.

In other words, the maps with the least interesting battles also have the most prominence, at least on the world map.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
6n0gq7xy o

This guy decided it was a great idea to go after the boss.

7k9m4571 o

What did you expect?

Guess he thought that he was the protagonist of this story, and that Holmes and co. were just interesting NPC's to add flavor to the world...

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Kenlqafo oRjijc7p0 o

Oh, hey. He lived. Woo.

...And then he quickly learned his place in this universe, and decided to take his second chance.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
4mjgucbw oP89opk3n o

With that out of the way, let's take a look at Holmes's animations. He's still ultra-depressed.

04edcfbn o Sigh. You again. You hairy ballsacks are even more ugly up close. And now I have to get my hands dirty with a sword.

04edcfbn o What did I do to turn my luck so south?

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
5z2slegz o

...Oi! What're you doing? I only meant to show off your animations!

04edcfbn o Okay, you know what? I'm actually pissed by how this week has been going.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Aujx0lap o

04edcfbn oWhy don't I practice on you!

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
3wt7c4qw o

Okay, he's suddenly a hunchback--

It looks like he's dragging his sword along the ground while running to create those sparks.

That, or his sword is on fire, and he's having an angry staring contest with a giant eyeball while trying to put it out.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Beqdxbh7 oMkds53mf o

BLISTERING BARNACLES! THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE'S DOING?!

Okay, now I'm confused. The first picture looks like he's doing a backflip, but the second looks like he's doing a front flip.

Actually, it looks more like he's running on the spherical surface of the monster in the second screenshot.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Wu4becsk oJz72ir32 o

Well. I've got to hand it to you, Holmes: that was epic.

Who knew that Holmes could nail a superhero landing so well?

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Ht6bahmk o

Well, I didn't mean this kind of skill, but okay, sign me right up!

So yeah, this is what I've been hyping up all this time. Starting at level 28 and all the way up to level 31, Garo starts learning skills like a madman. What kind of skills? Wrath, obviously, Flurry, Nihil and Lethality.

Nihil and Lethality are cute bonuses, but... Wrath and Flurry. You know how hilariously good Mintz is thanks to those skills? Now imagine them on a guy who's all capped. Yeah. This is why using Garo is fun, even if it's not the best thing to do. Get him an occult book and a ton of expereince, and maybe the move potion to help that lackluster pace of his (wink wink nudge nudge), and he'll become an absolute force of nature that will break the game in ten tiny pieces - at least!

Ah, so there was a reason you were sticking by him all this time. Aside from Garo turning out awesome, that is.

Definitely give him the move potion. He gets my vote once more!

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
J1rlrhld o

Okay, let me explain myself. Keeping the rewind function on slows down the emulator when I speed things up. Normally I keep it enabled to get better shots of combat and to catch any text that I may've missed (and, admittedly, to correct the occasional missclick). However, when I was dance-grinding Plum, I turned it off so as not to die of terminal boredom. The result is that, when I entered the Tower of Morse, Shigen's line flashed on-screen for a second and then I pressed C by mistake and missed it.

Now, I know this doesn't explain why this is so shitty. It wouldn't have taken me more than a minute to do one of my fake ingame scenes. In fact, it took me longer to do this. But... c'mon, I wanted to let my artistic spirit loose for once! Can you blame me?!

It certainly caught me off guard in a good way, to say the least. Not a bad way to make up for missing the screenshot.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Vklwwyag o

Anyhow, enter Yoda. Does he look like you expected him to? For me, spot on except for the handlebar. I did not see that coming, but I love it.

He looks like the Dojo man from earlier. But when comparing the two, I noticed several differences in the hair, clothing, and face. And Yoda has a sword that's barely visible in the portrait. I have to give some props to the artist for making the differences subtle since at first glance it looks like another pallete swap.

He may not have the green skin, point ears, and small height, but I do not mind this Yoda at all.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

P1zzgcas o What's that? You thought this update wouldn't feature Holmes being an idiot because it's a gameplay update without dialogue? Hah! How adorable.

0zfd96rn o They've been talking for exactly 15 seconds (yeah, I timed it), and already Holmes is losing his nerve over literally nothing. If Julia is in this route, Yoda tells her she sucks and teaches her Astra by basically cutting her to ribbons until she has only 1 HP left, in which case I can understand Holmes getting tired of waiting. However, it seems I've managed to find exactly the right things to do in order to completely destroy the coherence of Holmes's route. I'll be honest with you guys: I'll take her confrontation with Lentzenheimer over Holmes being slightly less broken and a mediocre skill any day.

I'm going to go the route that Holmes was still "recovering" per se of meeting his father again, and him seeing an actually good father-son relation that he never had didn't help his mood, leading to him responding in a typical Holmes manner.

Also, I don't know whether Yoda gains or looses points for teaching Julia a skill by pretty much having her be at the receiving end of it. Guess it depends on how the scene is handled.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gmhhyxnn oSorry about that...

0zfd96rn o Sorry about what?! You've been talking for 15 seconds! He's the one who should be sorry!

Building off the above, Shigen probably understands that Holmes is ticked, and is either apologizing because he knows that those kind of wounds take time to heal, and Holmes seeing them talk without spite probably didn't help in said healing process, and/or it's so the conversation is dropped so that a pointless argument is avoided.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o I don't understand, what's the problem?

Maybe as others have said and Holmes doesn't really have anyone legendary on his crew, so this is a new experience for him? Or he doesn't know what to think about having a guy he backmouthed earlier that (if Julia was here) nearly cut another person to shreds as a lesson deciding to join his army.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Qqgk7cae oLlqqjhb3 oVpgrzdym o

Picking the "stills" option makes this cute little window appear whenever somebody fights. It's basically the same as normal fights, except without any cool transitions or animations. Nifty, I like it.

In other words, it's a staring contest that turns deadly.

Or it's how the original gaiden handled skipping animations.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
C26s17zc o

Ahahah! What a story, Lina.

That's... a pretty pitiful wound to die to.

Unless she was stabbed in the face and it went all the way through. Then it makes a bit more sense.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...the game skips everything. Of course. Well, it's LP canon that Eugen just quietly decapitated Arkis while Runan talked to the old guy.

Or he just walks away like a badass, leaving Arkis to die via the resulting explosion.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ih49ob2i oShe's certainly on the green side,

0zfd96rn o Ba dum tssss...

Anime color hair puns!

They're actually pretty rare, now that I think about it.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zfd96rn o She didn't swing her sword a single time, Eugen. What drugs are you on?

K87gtehn o

4lt3brpp o ...whatever it is, it's potent.

So in this alternative universe, Eugen is a stoner?

...I have many questions now about what else is different in this alternative timeline...

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
9ojakrn8 oJ3wczbum o5cuyeczh o

Skip. Okay, I wasn't expecting anything more.

If the both die, then the old man knows that Runan is 'ex' and Runan decides to address "the".

Perhaps Runan has a codename in this AU? Or The Roger lacks The "Roger" part of The Roger?

So many questions!

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Jy60qu9p o

Right, I forgot to comment on this guy last time.

I'm curious who this new guy is.

Also, there are two Part 57's.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
Zg5wptr7 o
 
Ipzap11u o
 
Gwvivb9n o
 
Iajnfhjg o

Okay, even if this guy didn't appear earlier in the story and I was just jumping in right now, these responses are epic.

On 6/22/2019 at 7:19 AM, Saint Rubenio said:
7nrlvafz o
 
Dkwimcp6 o

Ah, it's a device instead of magic. Interesting...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

0Tq9bDaysH3y30IJJPl6szd6OmmcbEu2NCMLb4YMXq7z3N_IW7fdev-UnbjF27_3g2nEAXUQEHfe5_labKFDdef9_mrwM0ddkrB3bsHIo7ML2X_02lKldO6fiKEOH14vcKDzA62U

I know it's a historical name, but make of that what you will.

Time traveller Kaga theory confirmed.

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:
On 6/22/2019 at 8:07 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

 

Possibly. Is there now a theory that Runan and Holmes promotions somehow caused Harvey Dent's coin to be marred in some kind of crossover butterfly effect?

I was actually implicating Holmes was the marred side of the coin. Kind of a bad reflection of Runan. Mind Dent was pretty damaged from before the acid, it was just the straw that broke the camel's back. A 90s telling of his origin showed the reason for the double-headed silver dollar was because his abusive father used to offer him a chance to avoid the beating if he could get tails on a coin-flip. When he gave Dent the coin years later... it became obvious why he could never win. Sort of like Ruben with 1% crits.
 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

From what I can tell, Thracia, Awakening, and Echoes/Gaiden are three games in the series that are best at making everyone viable, even though they accomplish this in different ways.

That said... I've never seen anyway to take Nomah or Luthier into endgame without them being a liability due to being doubled easily. Booey and Clive used to be on this list... but then I had runs which kind of fixed that. Valbar... I don't know how he survived in retrospect but the witches kept targetting other units due to their wonky AI.
 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

In other words, Eugen was one of the few people okay with Shadow Dragons Gaiden mechanic. 

He most likely invented it.
 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

I can also see Arkis saving himself from that situation if he used the little he had of a brain.

Like telling someone in battle he was Arkis, putting on a fake fight, and faking death so that they wouldn't kill Lina, only to rejoin the moment she was safe? Mind you Lentzenheimer is enough of a scumbag I'm surprised there wasn't an order to kill Lina the moment Arkis had left because he didn't expect him back.
 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

That's... a pretty pitiful wound to die to.

Unless she was stabbed in the face and it went all the way through. Then it makes a bit more sense.

Well, look at Lina's stats. She could probably die to a paper cut.
 

1 hour ago, Hawkwing said:

Right, I forgot to comment on this guy last time.

I'm curious who this new guy is.

Also, there are two Part 57's.

The actual Morgan from Binding Blade... who kind of was a loose end last LP because of being from the non-canon Route B. The guy who, by being a palette swap boss with no plot significance, became a joke about being the most generic boss in Fire Emblem (to the point Ruben reinforces this with endless palette swaps of him on generic enemy portraits). So in irony the most plot irrelevant character of all time becomes plot relevant thanks to Ruben.... taking the joke full circle. This is a brick joke that started last LP in Chapter 11B and has only finally landed.

https://fireemblem.fandom.com/wiki/Morgan_(The_Binding_Blade)

Edited by The Roger The Paladin
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...