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This is pretty much "Explain a movie plot badly" for Fire Emblem, except it's not just limited to the overall story. It can be about supports, cut-scenes, story events, gameplay, etc.

For some examples:

King creates decades long conspiracy, escalates a minor conflict into a continental war, and ends up sacrificing his life, all to get rid of one insane person.

Spoiler

Rudolf entrusts Alm to Mycen, supports Desaix to get Zofia to declare a full out war, and dies so that Alm takes the throne of Rigel. And one goal of this plan was to kill the insane Duma.

Man turns food testing event into a diplomatic marriage proposal to aid with race relations. Woman licks his eyes.

Spoiler

Stalh and Panne's support chain.

A rabbit, a candyman, and a historic cosplayer all join army on the spot to prevent assassination attempt.

Spoiler

Chapter 6 of Fire Emblem Awakening.

Desperate heroes go back in time to the previous generation to prevent a zombie apocalypse. End up fighting in a different conflict entirely.

Spoiler

The child characters appear very close to the beginning of the Valm arc, which has very little to do with stopping Grima.

Priestess goes on pilgrimage to the main temple of her goddess. Accidentally eradicates criminal empire along the way.

Spoiler

Celica's route in Act 2 and 3 of Gaiden/Shadows of Valentia.

Calvary kill ten attackers by standing still in a corridor.

Spoiler

Due to how the defense stat works, cavaliers can make good tanks during the enemy phase, despite real life cavalry not at all being ideal for defense.

 

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28 minutes ago, Von Ithipathachai said:

A pegasister recruits a gay man into the MLP fandom

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Please don't hurt me mods, I don't mean anything bad by this

. . .uh, what.

Anyway. . .

Get trained, get ripped, get out.

Spoiler

The very basic life of Ike.

 

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A fat pig lit my dream girl on fire, so I lit the fat bacon on fire.

Spoiler

Book II Heroes.

 

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Red-haired man invites Blue-haired man and his friends to a BBQ, where the main course is the Blue-haired man and his friends.

Spoiler

End of Chapter 5 of Genealogy of the Holy War.

Kidnapped child faces existential crisis.

Spoiler

Fates' decision route split thing.

 

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Cult leader stalks teenage girl to sacrifice her to his god while avoiding her alcoholic chaperone.

Spoiler

Jedah, Celica, and Saber.

 

Edited by Dragoncat
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9 minutes ago, Von Ithipathachai said:

That legit sounds like some kind of weird 60's/70's B-movie.

Lol.

A fat man who collects exotic animals gets attacked by one of the birds and the bird escapes.

Spoiler

Reyson punching Oliver.

 

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Man that really loves women hits on an underage girl.

Spoiler

Sain X Rebecca's support conversations. Sain is in his 20s whilst older than Kent while Rebecca is 15.

 

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Unsupervised children start an army.

Spoiler

Basically the beginning of Chapter 6 in FE4.

Unsupervised children join an army.

Spoiler

Beginning of Gaiden/Echoes.

Man gets intimate with dragon woman.

Spoiler

Roy's (possible) conception.

 

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Boy whose best friend's alter-ego is a ballista lord goes around the continent forming a harem which includes his childhood friend, a pegasister, a Sacaean nomad, a teenage hooker, his teacher, a half-dragon shaman, the sister of the psycho who killed his childhood friend's dad, and culminates in piercing a dragon woman (also an acquaintance of psyho dude) with his blade. Along the way he picks up a priestess who's also the handmaiden of psycho dude's sister, the daughter of two FE7 prepromotes, a girl who isn't in Kansas anymore, a girl who wants to go to Neverland and start a fast food chain, a tree with a sword, two more pegasisters, a monotreme who mothered ancient Greek monsters, a ginger thief girl, Princess Minerva from Macedonia in Archanea, the daughter of an Avenger, a little dragon girl they have to babysit, and an old woman they picked up in Canada to babysit the little girl in their stead.

Spoiler

Binding Blade in a nutshell.

Whew that was a mouthful.

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I love these things

Local Duke marries chick he's known for five minutes, accidentally conquers most of the continent, and, as a reward, gets invited to barbecue, after that, the Duke's son must kill his inbred half-brother, while also getting hit on by some chick who absolutely isn't his half-sister.

Spoiler

Genealogy of the Holy War

 

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NTR protagonist accidentaly conquer the world and get killed in a barbecue

 

Spoiler

Fe4 part 1 ending

Light novel protagonist conquer the world for a slime in order to kill him and then an edgy teen attack

 

Spoiler

Conquest epilogue

 

Edited by Flere210
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Once there was a lord in a medieval fantasy setting. He fought in a war against the bad guys. He killed them all with some help from friends he made along the way. Some of which disappeared without a trace after the war because reasons. Also there were dragons and magic and a character that died that the lord really regrets dying but you had no choice but for it to happen.

Know what? I don't think this one needs a spoiler. It's your favourite Fire Emblem.

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A young man and his friends go to see a winter wonderland with his other friend.

The other friend turns out to be a real spicy meatball.

Spoiler

Birthright Chapter 17.

Man thinks he has a short expiration date, but another friend tells him it is starting to feel like a month.

Spoiler

Why Book 3 will make better sense binge-played. Along with every other book. Where’s chapter 4?

Redhead shows ugly dude that the redhead is better than what it looks like.

Spoiler

The finale of the Mangs Shadow Dragon Let’s Play, where Radd beats Medeus.

 

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