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SF's "Write Your Butt Off" Competition HD II.5 Remix

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Just now, Ottservia said:

I know I was just impulsively saying that because I felt like it but thanks for the kind words. 

XD I live to serve XP

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53 minutes ago, DarthR0xas said:

Yo dude you have a yuri fetish?

I just find the idea of two anime girls loving each other cute

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True to what I said, I rushed this one out. It's mostly just conversation pieces so no fancy prose at all. The bit with Renning in particular I could have done a lot more with to give a sense of space. But I didn't want to miss this deadline. I'll leave an author's note saying which story this is based off of at the end and why specifically I wanted to write about this one.

Huzzah They're Dead

Words: 1484

Spoiler

There was a knock on the door. Lord Degore muttered as he scrambled out of bed to answer it. In the hallway stood a tall man with blond hair and a large black cloak. “How fair you this evening dear Lucan,” he asked. “Hope I woke you not.”

               “Wake me? It’s the middle of the bloody knight. Of course you woke me. What is it?”

               “Trouble has entered our fair lands. The Riven Bridge has been taken, seized by Daein.”

               “What? War?” Lord Degore rubbed is chin. “I see. Well I can’t say I’m entirely surprised. That new king of theirs, Ashnard, he does seem the sort.”

               “Fortune smilest on us not, for our king very much is surprised. We are defenceless.”

               “How defenceless?”

               “Pack your things and go defenceless.”

               “Now? In the middle of the night?”

               “Better now than whence the common folk find out.”

               “Damnit,” Degore muttered. “Okay, okay. Thanks for telling me Bastian.”

               “Wish I could stay longer. Alas there are many other souls that need be informed.”

               Degore closed the door on his midnight visitor and retreated back into his quarters. He glanced over at his bed. It was empty. He and his wife hadn’t slept together in years. He couldn’t even recall the last time they’d spoken together. He climbed the stairs up to what was previously the servants room, and was now the bedroom of the lady of the house. He didn’t bother knocking as he barged in. “Get your things,” he ordered, without looking at his wife. “Crimea is under attack. You’re to take the children and flee.”

               “What? Now?”

               He ignored her as puller apart her wardrobe finding something appropriate to wear. Leave it up to her and she’d choose something impractical. He spent as little time as he could in the room before leaving, descending down the stairs back to his own bedroom. To his surprise he found his son Mordred waiting for him down there.

               “Father,” he said. “What’s going on? What’s all the commotion?”

               “Daein has invaded. You’re to leave with your mother and sister immediately.”

               “What of you? What are you going to do father?”

               “I’m the head of this house. There are duties I need to attend to.”

               “And Kieran? Is he staying too?”

               “Well he’s a member of the Royal Knights. He’ll likely be fighting.” Lord Degore had spared a thought for his second son. It had been over a year since they had seen each other.

               “If he’s fighting, so am I,” Mordred announced.

               “Don’t be a fool, boy. Your brother’s likely going to get himself killed in this war and he’s at least had some training. You wouldn’t know the right end of a sword to carry.”

               “I’m not a boy anymore,” Mordred protested. So Lord Degore hit him.

               “You want to prove to me you’re a man, then take care of your mother and sister.”

               Mordred had only a glare as a response. He was used to getting his own way.

               “Stop looking at me like that and help me dress. I must offer my services to the king.”

               Instead of the king he got an audience with the King’s brother, Renning. Though to call it an audience was a bit much. He had to jog after the man as he hurried from one side of the castle to the other.

               “What’s your name?” Renning asked.

               “I am the Lord of Degore. I’m here to offer my services to you.”

               “Honestly unless you know how to hold a lance, you’re better off fleeing. This invasion has come at a particularly bad time for us. The Daein army have free rein from the border to the capital. I need to organize a sortie at once.”

               “You’re going out to fight them?”

               “There’s no other choice.”

               “Why not a siege?”

               Renning shook his head. “That would just give them free access to the rest of the country. We have to conserve as many of our forces as possible and turn this in to a gruella war. They can take the capital, but they’ll never take Crimea.”

               “And what of the king?”

               “I’d prefer he depart immediately, but he wishes to stay with the people for as long as possible. At least he’s agreed to move his daughter to a more secure location.”

               “Wait, the king has a daughter?”

               “Yes. It’s likely I’ll be dead by this time next week, so we need as many people to know about her as possible now. What did you say your name is?”

               “Eh, Degore. Lucan Degore.”

               “You didn’t know about the princess?”

               “No. No idea.”

               “Don’t you have a son in the Fifth Platoon?”

               “Well yes, I have a son in the royal knights, but I don’t know off hand which platoon he is in.”

               “I’m certain you do. Kieran Degore. My protégée, Geoffrey, has pointed him out to me. He says he’s a good soldier.”

               “Kieran? A good soldier?”

               “You seem surprised.”

               “Well I can only praise the training of the Crimean Royal Knights if that’s the case. My son is an oaf.”

               “Well I hope for the princess’s sake he’s not. He’ll be one of the men guarding her.”

               “Oh goddess help us,” Lord Degore said, shaking his head.

               “Look, I don’t have much more time to talk to you.” Lord Renning climbed onto a horse. Degore hadn’t even realized they’d walked as far as the stables. “If you want to make yourself useful I can only tell you to assist with the evacuation.”

               Degore returned to his quarters. He was surprised to see his wife standing in the entrance hall wearing a long hooded cloak. “What are you still doing here?” he asked. “I told you to go.”

               “Mordred won’t come with us.”

               “Stupid child,” Degore muttered as he pushed past. “Mordred,” he shouted. “Mordred?”

               “He’s not here,” his wife said. “He’s run off somewhere.”

               “Blasted child,” Degroe swore. “Alright, you take Nim and go.”

               “I can’t go alone. Come with me.”

               It was entirely unexpected. This was a woman who barely acknowledged his existence. “I can’t do that.”

               “Why not?”

               “I am a servant of the crown. My place is here. By the king’s side. Now go. Get my children to safety.”

               “What about Mordred?”

               “I know where he is.”

 

               Degore found Mordred on the roof, looking up at the stars. It was the place Degore had taken him regularly as a child. “I should have run off to somewhere less obvious. A bar would have been a good idea.”

               “Why won’t you go, Mordred?”

               “I’ll only go if you come with me, father, but I know you won’t.”

               “Why?”
               “You wish to serve your king; I wish to serve my father. There’s nothing strange about that.”

               “You are my heir. If you wish to serve me you can do it best by escaping. I need you to continue our family name.”

               Mordred shook his head. “I’m not serving house Degore. I’m serving you, father. I love you. I’ll not leave your side.”

               Part of Degore wanted to his Mordred for being such a fool. Part of him wanted to hug him. The latter part run out. “You are my son,” he whispered in Mordred’s ear. “It is no surprise you are like me.”

 

               The wyverns arrived by noon the next day. From that same rooftop rampart they could spy an ocean of black armour approaching from the east. Inside the Degore apartments stood about three dozen people. Mostly men, though a few women. From their dress Degore could guess the majority of them were servants who had stayed behind for reasons similar to his own.

               “We’ve sent an army out to meet Daein,” he announced. “And it’s an army that has no hope of winning. Its only purpose is to delay that bastard Ashnard from getting here. Meanwhile our families are fleeing the city en masse. Once Ashnard seizes this city, he will begin scouring the countryside. Our families need every second they can get to flee further from this chaos.” He drew his fencing rapier and held it vertically in front of his face. “Once they take this city, let’s give them another hopeless battle. For delaying them by seconds is worth it. Grab a knife, a club, anything you can find.” He swung his sword for emphasis. “And let’s give these Daein bastards hell. Let’s show them Crimea will not go down without a fight."

 

 Author's Note

Spoiler

 

So this story is obviously based off the backstory alluded to in Ana's story two rounds back. I kind of got some flak for pointing out how psychopathic it was for Kieran to rejoice at the death of his father and brother in the midst of the brutal sacking of his capital by an invading army. So I wanted to explore that situation a bit by writing basically a brutish character who's facing death and show him as still fundamentally human. Hopefully I achieved that much. There's also some key details with that I was given that points a different picture than Ana likely didn't intend. Namely that Kieran's sister and mother likely survived (because if not his happiness at his father and brother dying overwhelming his sorrow of his mother and sister dying is kind of even more messed up). So if they were able to escape, how come his father and brother didn't? We also have confirmation in Path of Radiance that a lot of nobles did manage to go underground and continue the fight, so it's more likely they chose to stay. 

That's all the subject I wanted to write about, but actually finding the time and motivation to do it was a bit difficult. So it's ended up a bit on the rushed and short side. I would have liked to have done a bit deeper a dive into things. Maybe include King Ramon in it too, but I have other more pressing projects. So simply expressing the idea in something of an abridged form works well enough for me.

Also wow. Reading up on Kieran’s supports for this story, he’s claimed to have fought crocodiles and giant scorpions. In a bizarre coincidence I once wrote a comedic choose your own adventure story set in Hatari where Tauroneo could wind up fighting both crocodiles and a giant scorpion. I had no clue at the time those things were actually canon to Tellius. He also fought a giant spider too but unfortunately that didn’t happen to be coincidentally included in my bizarre story.

 

 

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46 minutes ago, Azure loves his Half Elves said:

I think I might need more time to complete my story. Is that alright?

How much time?

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6 minutes ago, Azure loves his Half Elves said:

Give me two more days. I’ll be sure to post my story by then.

If not, go without me. My entry will become unofficial.

I'll give you 24 hours. Report your progress either tonight or tomorrow morning and we'll reevaluate.

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...Wow. Not one, but TWO people wrote entries based off of my stuff for this? I'm really amazed. I didn't think anybody here cared all that much about my stuff. I don't consider myself a bad writer, but I certainly don't think I'm superb at it either. Just better than I was, say, ten years ago. And way better than I was around fifteen years ago. I shudder to think about the garbage I wrote back then. lol

I suppose I ought to comment on both, though so far I've only gone through @Ottservia's. And I can't say I particularly like the direction you took with it, Otts. Mainly the fact that you had Robin stay alive in the end like Awakening actually does if he/she kills Grima. Even though I've gone with Awakening's route for my usual fiction there, I have to admit it's kind of dumb that Robin came back because BONDS! 😕 Robin staying dead is more emotional and more realistic imo. Otherwise though, I think you did a good job with this. It does what you're trying to make it do. I may not agree with the concept, but that's all I don't agree with. It's like how I don't care for Sci-Fi stories. They're not my thing, but I'm sure many are still well written.

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4 minutes ago, Anacybele said:

I suppose I ought to comment on both, though so far I've only gone through @Ottservia's. And I can't say I particularly like the direction you took with it, Otts. Mainly the fact that you had Robin stay alive in the end like Awakening actually does if he/she kills Grima. Even though I've gone with Awakening's route for my usual fiction there, I have to admit it's kind of dumb that Robin came back because BONDS! 😕 Robin staying dead is more emotional and more realistic imo. Otherwise though, I think you did a good job with this. It does what you're trying to make it do. I may not agree with the concept, but that's all I don't agree with. It's like how I don't care for Sci-Fi stories. They're not my thing, but I'm sure many are still well written.

There were a couple ideas I wanted to go for with this piece as a lot of it was more metaphorical than anything realistic as Robin is in purgatory more or less. Basically one of the core ideas of awakening’s narrative was that of overcoming the past and not repeating one’s mistakes to continue the endless cycle of failure. In that Robin is drowning in an endless sea of her own despair, anguish, and hatred. Grima is more or less a physical embodiment of those emotions and well they’re both dead so it makes sense for him(her?) to be there and torment Robin as they usually do. The implication I was going for was that Robin was drowning because she gave into those emotions before killing Grima in your fic. She gave into her hatred, her despair, her anguish, and her anger. She didn’t kill Grima out of a selfless desire to protect everyone. She did it out of a selfish desire to satisfy her own personal vendetta. So in that way she didn’t truly kill Grima as she gave into the very emotions he embodies. I wanted her to face the consequences of that.

The second idea I was going for was the idea of her dying to see Frederick again but because she was selfish she doesn’t get too. She is able to come back but Frederick is not and I wanted to kind of explore the feelings and emotions that kind of situation would give rise too. Like even in death she can’t be with the one she loves because she died for selfish reasons. She simply has to accept that he’s dead and move on and that’s generally one of the core ideas I was going for

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It is with great frustration that I click 'acknowledge' on my warning before the intended date, but this had to be shared. Special thanks to @Scoot for providing the base piece to work with, and to Owl City for writing Firebird as it assisted the writing process here.

Notes:

Spoiler

PLEASE someone get the reference in the Council's name.

Corrin did not realize the power he discovered in his Anna Supports. Fates Anna was sweating in her Outlaw boots while passing it off as just a name discovery.

The news on the computer is a trailer for BN7. I swear this is not an attack on Anon.

Yes, I did use a non-participation entry, if that means this has to be non-participation then ok.

(censored) you Integrity.

That is all.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to writing my Narcian parody of Mi Mi Mi.

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6 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

There were a couple ideas I wanted to go for with this piece as a lot of it was more metaphorical than anything realistic as Robin is in purgatory more or less. Basically one of the core ideas of awakening’s narrative was that of overcoming the past and not repeating one’s mistakes to continue the endless cycle of failure. In that Robin is drowning in an endless sea of her own despair, anguish, and hatred. Grima is more or less a physical embodiment of those emotions and well they’re both dead so it makes sense for him(her?) to be there and torment Robin as they usually do. The implication I was going for was that Robin was drowning because she gave into those emotions before killing Grima in your fic. She gave into her hatred, her despair, her anguish, and her anger. She didn’t kill Grima out of a selfless desire to protect everyone. She did it out of a selfish desire to satisfy her own personal vendetta. So in that way she didn’t truly kill Grima as she gave into the very emotions he embodies. I wanted her to face the consequences of that.

The second idea I was going for was the idea of her dying to see Frederick again but because she was selfish she doesn’t get too. She is able to come back but Frederick is not and I wanted to kind of explore the feelings and emotions that kind of situation would give rise too. Like even in death she can’t be with the one she loves because she died for selfish reasons. She simply has to accept that he’s dead and move on and that’s generally one of the core ideas I was going for

Oh. I suppose I understand then. It's at least not all about the "bonds of friendship" nonsense.

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8 minutes ago, Anacybele said:

Oh. I suppose I understand then. It's at least not all about the "bonds of friendship" nonsense.

Hey don’t knock the power of friendship that shit is goated. I will admit to being a sucker for it. The power of love and friendship was an idea I was going for regardless as that’s what allows her want to breathe again. Like it’s more metaphorical if nothing else. You drown in an ocean of your own despair and don’t know what to do but your friends are by your side and will help you pick yourself back up. I just generally find messages like that sweet and heartwarming. The idea that you’re not alone that there are people by your side who care about you and have faith in you. And knowing that is what gives you the strength to keep moving forward. It’s generally a message that we could all stand to hear. You’re not alone.

Edited by Ottservia

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12 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

Hey don’t knock the power of friendship that shit is goated. I will admit to being a sucker for it. The power of love and friendship was an idea I was going for regardless as that’s what allows her want to breathe again. Like it’s more metaphorical if nothing else. You drown in an ocean of your own despair and don’t know what to do but your friends are by your side and will help you pick yourself back up. I just generally find messages like that sweet and heartwarming. The idea that you’re not alone that there are people by your side who care about you and have faith in you. And knowing that is what gives you the strength to keep moving forward. It’s generally a message that we could all stand to hear. You’re not alone.

It's all fine and dandy being surrounded by people who truly love and care about you, sure. I won't argue with that.

But "the power of friendship" doing stuff like bringing a seemingly dead person back to life? Or defeating evil? Yeah, no. Take it from all the real life soldiers who fall in war who probably were friends with each other. Their bonds didn't protect them. Sorry, but I just don't believe in that cheesy stuff, especially as someone who doesn't even try to make friends anymore. I am alone and happy with it.

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2 minutes ago, Anacybele said:

It's all fine and dandy being surrounded by people who truly love and care about you, sure. I won't argue with that.

But "the power of friendship" doing stuff like bringing a seemingly dead person back to life? Or defeating evil? Yeah, no. Take it from all the real life soldiers who fall in war who probably were friends with each other. Their bonds didn't protect them. Sorry, but I just don't believe in that cheesy stuff, especially as someone who doesn't even try to make friends anymore. I am alone and happy with it.

Is it unrealistic? Maybe but storytelling is inherently unrealistic so that doesn’t matter. It’s just a feeling I feel like we all can relate too. The pain of loneliness is one too hard to bear if you ask me. No one to talk to or share your feelings with. It’s unbearable really. As someone who has had darker than average thoughts the idea of someone out there who does legitimately care are thoughts that have prevented the worst case scenario but I digress. Stories like that just mean a lot to me. because well I’m just a person who puts a lot of value in others’ faith in me. It allows me to keep “rolling on” as it were

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25 minutes ago, SoulWeaver said:

It is with great frustration that I click 'acknowledge' on my warning before the intended date, but this had to be shared.

Glad to have you back, Soul.

Now get to the Ruined World threat before I take this boot and this mask and so help me-

25 minutes ago, SoulWeaver said:

Special thanks to @Scoot for providing the base piece to work with, and to Owl City for writing Firebird as it assisted the writing process here.

Oh hey I like Owl City. This story was like a megacrossover. I can see a continuity of nonsense arising and it pleases me.

Remember this moment, it will become relevant later. You're gonna be trembling a year, bet.

30 minutes ago, SoulWeaver said:

The news on the computer is a trailer for BN7. I swear this is not an attack on Anon.

I don't know what the big deal is, the trailer's been out for over two years.

 

32 minutes ago, SoulWeaver said:

(censored)

I'm earnestly glad nobody reads these threads, but thank goodness nobody reads these threads.

Non-participant entries are okay as long as you didn't write them.

2 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

Is it unrealistic? Maybe but storytelling is inherently unrealistic so that doesn’t matter.

By virtue of not being real a story is unbound by anything, yet it has an obligation to convey the social reality properly, lest it peddle delusions to the already deceived generations of men.

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2 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

Is it unrealistic? Maybe but storytelling is inherently unrealistic so that doesn’t matter. It’s just a feeling I feel like we all can relate too. The pain of loneliness is one too hard to bear if you ask me. No one to talk to or share your feelings with. It’s unbearable really. As someone who has had darker than average thoughts the idea of someone out there who does legitimately care are thoughts that have prevented the worst case scenario but I digress. Stories like that just mean a lot to me. because well I’m just a person who puts a lot of value in others’ faith in me. It allows me to keep “rolling on” as it were

Storytelling is unrealistic? Then why is there a thing called nonfiction?

Also, you're foolish to put value in other people having faith in you. Take it from me, someone who's dealt with far more bullies and fake "friends" than anything else. I've been lied to, used, and even rudely pranked. In school once, I received a note that some unknown person in another class had a crush on me. Turned out to be completely fake. That incident started me down the path I'm on now. Gradually, I grew more and more disinterested in the ideas of friends and romance and whatnot and now I've lost all interest in them completely. I'm only keeping the one friend I've had since before much of that in Dragoncat and that's all. I've known her and talked to her for too long to just tell her I won't be friends anymore all because I don't care about friends anymore. Otherwise, I would've cut contact with her too. And even then, I don't think her friendship would really help me succeed in anything. To get success I believe I have to work for it myself and nothing more.

And anyway, I only know her online. It's not the same as having a friend in person, even if you talk daily for hours. Physically, I'm still alone and just fine.

Simply put though, too many people used me, lied to me, hurt me in some other way, or pretended to have faith in me or be my friend when they really weren't and I'm not letting myself get into those situations anymore. There have also been cases where I mistakenly hurt others with my own flaws since I'm also not good at socializing. I've even tried to improve myself, but that's never been enough either. I don't care about people anymore, I'd generally rather be by myself and not have to deal with them.

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1 minute ago, Anacybele said:

Then why is there a thing called nonfiction?

Nonfiction ain't storytelling, though-It's things such as math textbooks, etc. Anything that involves telling a story, even a historical one, would generally be considered fiction, with maybe a few exceptions.

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1 minute ago, Benice said:

Nonfiction ain't storytelling, though-It's things such as math textbooks, etc. Anything that involves telling a story, even a historical one, would generally be considered fiction, with maybe a few exceptions.

...What? Seriously, what? I've definitely heard of nonfiction that tells stories. It's just true stories in this case and in the form of writing.

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Just now, Anacybele said:

...What? Seriously, what? I've definitely heard of nonfiction that tells stories. It's just true stories in this case and in the form of writing.

Again, with few exceptions-Most nonfiction stories, such as retelling of historical events, have historical inaccuracies, new characters and other shenanigains, which is why I hesitate to say there's a large pool of truly nonfiction media.

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10 minutes ago, Anacybele said:

Storytelling is unrealistic? Then why is there a thing called nonfiction?

Also, you're foolish to put value in other people having faith in you. Take it from me, someone who's dealt with far more bullies and fake "friends" than anything else. I've been lied to, used, and even rudely pranked. In school once, I received a note that some unknown person in another class had a crush on me. Turned out to be completely fake. That incident started me down the path I'm on now. Gradually, I grew more and more disinterested in the ideas of friends and romance and whatnot and now I've lost all interest in them completely. I'm only keeping the one friend I've had since before much of that in Dragoncat and that's all. I've known her and talked to her for too long to just tell her I won't be friends anymore all because I don't care about friends anymore. Otherwise, I would've cut contact with her too. And even then, I don't think her friendship would really help me succeed in anything. To get success I believe I have to work for it myself and nothing more.

And anyway, I only know her online. It's not the same as having a friend in person, even if you talk daily for hours. Physically, I'm still alone and just fine.

Simply put though, too many people used me, lied to me, hurt me in some other way, or pretended to have faith in me or be my friend when they really weren't and I'm not letting myself get into those situations anymore. There have also been cases where I mistakenly hurt others with my own flaws since I'm also not good at socializing. I've even tried to improve myself, but that's never been enough either. I don't care about people anymore, I'd generally rather be by myself and not have to deal with them.

You sound like an anime villain ngl but I digress. Agree to disagree on this one

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Continuity of Nonsense:

Let me know if I missed anything.

50 minutes ago, Anacybele said:

Also, you're foolish to put value in other people having faith in you.

You are fool, Mega Man.

The world is full of degenerates whose company is more a burden than anything else, but that makes those few decent friends all the more precious. In this miserable world where you have no allies and are beset by enemies on all sides, don't you at least want a friend?

39 minutes ago, Benice said:

Again, with few exceptions-Most nonfiction stories, such as retelling of historical events, have historical inaccuracies, new characters and other shenanigains, which is why I hesitate to say there's a large pool of truly nonfiction media.

Yeah that's a huge problem, actually. It's why I don't watch a lot of historical fiction films. Gives ya wrong impressions.

Edited by AnonymousSpeed

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