Transgender People in the World Today and a Confession

[Azure the Scale Tipper]

Well, you are still you, Rezzy. Even though we do not talk much, I do support you.

Basically echoing sentiments I agree with.

[BrightBow]

You know, I'm not very socially skilled, to say the least. So normally I'd shy away from commenting on the issues of sensitive personal issues out of fear of making things worse. But given this particular subject, I suppose just showing support is valuable enough to not submit to my cowardice for once. 

I'm glad to hear that you were able to express yourself openly. God knows I tend to fail that kind of thing on far more mundane subjects. I wish you nothing but the best moving forward.

[Rezzy]

1 hour ago, EricaofRenais said:

You are you and I support you for having the will to be able to live your life and to come out as who you truly are.  Life is hard enough without having to hide who you are, I hope you can now move forward and just be you without the stress of hiding a part of yourself.

Thanks!

1 hour ago, Dayni said:

I'll be honest, this changes nothing about how I've known you around these forums over the years. You are who you are now and this changes nothing personally.

I consider that a positive. I hope others who learn about it from now on can accept you as a whole regardless.

And yeah, looking at the picture I'm pretty sure you'd blend in fine 😛

I hope so, I'm worried about getting clocked right away all the time.

1 hour ago, Shoblongoo said:

You know my thoughts on the matter. Glad you’re at a place in life where you feel loved and supported enough to come out. For whatever it’s worth IRL; you’re always among friends here at The Forest.

Thanks, it seems to be a positive reception so far.

54 minutes ago, The Geek said:

Being trans doesn't make you any less of a woman than a cis woman.  We all support you, and thank you for telling your story.

I try to keep telling myself that's the case.

37 minutes ago, Mukmuk said:

Even though we've never met, I fully support you. Thanks for being brave enough to come out- your gender doesn't define who you are. 

Again, I applaud your bravery, and bravo 🙏

Thanks, I don't think we've talked before, but I appreciate it all the same.

20 minutes ago, Azure, Roundabouted Out said:

Well, you are still you, Rezzy. Even though we do not talk much, I do support you.

Basically echoing sentiments I agree with.

Thanks Azure

17 minutes ago, BrightBow said:

You know, I'm not very socially skilled, to say the least. So normally I'd shy away from commenting on the issues of sensitive personal issues out of fear of making things worse. But given this particular subject, I suppose just showing support is valuable enough to not submit to my cowardice for once. 

I'm glad to hear that you were able to express yourself openly. God knows I tend to fail that kind of thing on far more mundane subjects. I wish you nothing but the best moving forward.

I hope people don't worry about offending me.  I really hope people aren't afraid to speak freely around me.  If anyone ever has questions for me, or just about being trans in general, I'm always eager to help clear up any confusion.

[Jave]

As long as you're happy and you feel comfortable with who you identify yourself with, that's all that matters.

For me, you're still the same Rezzy I've known and loved for years.

[Parrhesia]

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough in the community to come out; I'm glad the community is proving supportive. You've got my support, as well. Here's hoping that your mother comes around to seeing the light.

[Maddie]

@Rezzy Thanks for the support and I hope you don't mind me messaging you on Discord. It'll feel better having someone to talk to rather than keeping it to myself.

[Strullemia]

I've seen you quite a bit on this forum and while we've never talked you seem like a good person  and really trans or not the way I see it that's all that matters. After all it's your happiness that matters most.

I'm happy for you to see that you have the strength to come out and I hope that your mother will be able to accept you too.

[Xander]

Sorry you've had to live like that for your entire life. 

[Rezzy]

8 hours ago, Jave said:

As long as you're happy and you feel comfortable with who you identify yourself with, that's all that matters.

For me, you're still the same Rezzy I've known and loved for years.

Thanks, Jave, I've loved talking with you over on the FEH board.

5 hours ago, Parrhesia said:

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough in the community to come out; I'm glad the community is proving supportive. You've got my support, as well. Here's hoping that your mother comes around to seeing the light.

Thank you, that means a lot.  Frankly, I wasn't sure how this was going to go, but I've been gradually telling people lately, and felt it was time to take off the mask.

5 hours ago, Edegard1902 said:

@Rezzy Thanks for the support and I hope you don't mind me messaging you on Discord. It'll feel better having someone to talk to rather than keeping it to myself.

Yep, feel free to message me anytime and send a friend request.

3 hours ago, Hekselka said:

I've seen you quite a bit on this forum and while we've never talked you seem like a good person  and really trans or not the way I see it that's all that matters. After all it's your happiness that matters most.

I'm happy for you to see that you have the strength to come out and I hope that your mother will be able to accept you too.

I hope so

58 minutes ago, Xander said:

Sorry you've had to live like that for your entire life. 

I won't lie, it's been tough.  I wish I hadn't been born this way.

[Dark Holy Elf]

To echo others here, I know what you've had to go through is tough, but I'm so happy that you feel comfortable coming out to us here. I also think it's wonderful that you have a partner who understands and accepts you (and would that we lived in a world where that would be as common for trans individuals as cis individuals).

Please do not feel guilty about hiding a bit of yourself from us. I for one always appreciated how you shared details of your personal life with us (your partner, parenthood, your work as a doctor). What little you held back was for completely understandable reasons. I'm just happy you feel able to share with us now.

[Karimlan]

First of all, I'd like to say that I envy that dirty blond hair and how you can whip it back and forth.

Seriously speaking, there are worse communities/cliques to come out to than this one. A personal friend of mine from Singapore used to play guitar for one of the most extreme metal acts to hail from this part of Asia (Impiety) broke off from the band back in, what, 2010-2012; I forget now. He has since moved to Cambodia and came out less than a year hence. I'm pretty sure that her act raised a few eyebrows from underground metal fans, but those of us whom he's very close to respect and accept her for who she is. I do too.

Ditto with you, even though I only know you by name. 

[Integrity]

i will T-pose on your haters free of charge

[Specta]

it's pretty dope that you felt like sharing that part of you with us all

keep doing you girl

[Rezzy]

8 hours ago, Dark Holy Elf said:

To echo others here, I know what you've had to go through is tough, but I'm so happy that you feel comfortable coming out to us here. I also think it's wonderful that you have a partner who understands and accepts you (and would that we lived in a world where that would be as common for trans individuals as cis individuals).

Please do not feel guilty about hiding a bit of yourself from us. I for one always appreciated how you shared details of your personal life with us (your partner, parenthood, your work as a doctor). What little you held back was for completely understandable reasons. I'm just happy you feel able to share with us now.

Thanks for understanding.

8 hours ago, Karimlan said:

First of all, I'd like to say that I envy that dirty blond hair and how you can whip it back and forth.

Seriously speaking, there are worse communities/cliques to come out to than this one. A personal friend of mine from Singapore used to play guitar for one of the most extreme metal acts to hail from this part of Asia (Impiety) broke off from the band back in, what, 2010-2012; I forget now. He has since moved to Cambodia and came out less than a year hence. I'm pretty sure that her act raised a few eyebrows from underground metal fans, but those of us whom he's very close to respect and accept her for who she is. I do too.

Ditto with you, even though I only know you by name. 

Thanks, my goal is to grow my hair all the way down half my back again.
I'm not familiar with metal, but that sounds interesting.

2 hours ago, Integrity said:

i will T-pose on your haters free of charge

I hope you won't need to.

17 minutes ago, Specta said:

it's pretty dope that you felt like sharing that part of you with us all

keep doing you girl

Thanks, hope I'm accepted into the community of Rachels.  I've had the name picked out since I was 12.

[Johann]

It warms my heart just knowing you're doing well, doubly so that everyone here has been supportive. The world has a lot to learn about how to treat trans people with respect, so I initially feared something terrible had happened when I saw the thread title. Even if it feels a little mushy to say so on the internet, we all love you.

[Rezzy]

10 minutes ago, Johann said:

It warms my heart just knowing you're doing well, doubly so that everyone here has been supportive. The world has a lot to learn about how to treat trans people with respect, so I initially feared something terrible had happened when I saw the thread title. Even if it feels a little mushy to say so on the internet, we all love you.

Oh, hi Johann, hadn't seen you for a while, glad to see you're doing well.  Hope I didn't scare you too much.  As someone who's grown up over the past 3 decades or so, it's a difference world from the 90s, when I first started feeling this way.  It was barely even talked about back then, except as the occasional joke.

I still like using your Grima in Allegiance Battles.

[Dr. C]

On 10/7/2019 at 3:13 PM, Rezzy said:

So, this has been a long time coming.  I have a confession to make to all of you.  I am transgender MTF.  I was born male, but have presented as cis female to all of you for years.  This was never meant as anything meant to be maliciously deceptive, and everything else I've ever said is true.  I'm 33, I'm married with two kids, and I'm a doctor.

I'm not proud of the fact that I'm trans, and did not want to draw attention to it, but as I got to know all of you, I wanted to share certain things about myself, like the joys of parenthood.  The user who has popped here time to time is actually my wife, not my husband, and has known I was trans since before we were married.

Whenever transgender issues come into the news, it's almost always in a bad light, and many people in the LGBT community don't do us any favors.  I just wanted to be treated like anybody else and known for being Rezzy, not just "that trans person".

There are myriad reasons I've hid who I really was.  One major one was fear of social rejection.  I've now come out to almost all of my IRL friends and to my mother.  I'm hoping to do the same for the rest of my family, but things haven't been the best since telling my mother, since she's been avoiding me since i first told her, despite saying she still loved me on the day I told her.

The next major reason was fear of not being able to pursue my chosen career.  I felt being openly trans would have hurt any chance I had of ever being a doctor, so I hid it.

The last major reason was that I always wanted kids of my own, but thankfully, I was able to find a woman who accepted me for what I was, and willing to start a family with me.

 

I'm done hiding who I really am, but never really hid anything about myself besides my birth sex, and the friendships I've forged here are genuine, at least on my end.  If anyone has questions, either publicly, or privately, I will be happy to answer.

Wow that was powerful.

[XRay]

Thank you for sharing. Coming out is difficult, especially when being used to trying to keep things a secret for so long. I am honored that you feel we are deserving of getting to know you better.

[Rezzy]

9 hours ago, Dr. C said:

Wow that was powerful.

Thanks, I think

3 hours ago, XRay said:

Thank you for sharing. Coming out is difficult, especially when being used to trying to keep things a secret for so long. I am honored that you feel we are deserving of getting to know you better.

Yeah, it's been rough not really being able to be myself all these years.  Ironically, online is closer to the true Rezzy than IRL has been.

[Karimlan]

36 minutes ago, Rezzy said:

Ironically, online is closer to the true Rezzy than IRL has been.

It'll be amusing to know that online is closer to the true forumers (and by extension, Discord-ers) than IRL would be; it's just that most of us haven't felt comfortable enough in our own skins yet.

[The Roger The Paladin]

35 minutes ago, Rezzy said:

Yeah, it's been rough not really being able to be myself all these years.  Ironically, online is closer to the true Rezzy than IRL has been.

I'd say that makes it hard to consider what you did a deception. You didn't pretend to be someone you weren't. I mean, I'm sure everyone has something or other they don't talk about that they're particularly self-conscious about, no matter how trivial it may seem to others.

[Espurrhoodie]

20 minutes ago, Karimlan said:

It'll be amusing to know that online is closer to the true forumers (and by extension, Discord-ers) than IRL would be; it's just that most of us haven't felt comfortable enough in our own skins yet.

Yeah, pretty much. I'm nothing like how I am IRL.

Then again I don't get out much and have no friends. And I'm nearly as socially awkward as Bernadetta (unless it's something like Comic-Con).

[Maddie]

@Espurrhoodie I felt hurt when the other characters were telling Bernadetta that being in her room was unhealthy and she should make friends. If your socially awkward like I am you can't just 'go and make friends'. Also despite not being religious I kind of realised I am like Marianne most of the time IRL and the fact is I want to talk to people but I don't know what to say.

[Espurrhoodie]

2 minutes ago, Edegard1902 said:

@Espurrhoodie I felt hurt when the other characters were telling Bernadetta that being in her room was unhealthy and she should make friends. If your socially awkward like I am you can't just 'go and make friends'. Also despite not being religious I kind of realised I am like Marianne most of the time IRL and the fact is I want to talk to people but I don't know what to say.

Same here, bro.

Same.

[Rezzy]

12 minutes ago, Edegard1902 said:

@Espurrhoodie I felt hurt when the other characters were telling Bernadetta that being in her room was unhealthy and she should make friends. If your socially awkward like I am you can't just 'go and make friends'. Also despite not being religious I kind of realised I am like Marianne most of the time IRL and the fact is I want to talk to people but I don't know what to say.

 

9 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Same here, bro.

Same.

Yeah, Marianne's suicidal depression hit a little too close to home for me.