Espurr plays old DS shovelware (and some others)! Suffering through: Kung Fu Panda 2

[Espurrhoodie]

32 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Ok I like that word play.

This game is kind of half and half.

The good:

The art/graphics are decent.

The music is nice, albiet repetitive. It won't be number 1 on the list considering that LEGO LOTR/Harry Potter actually use the soundtrack of LOTR/Harry Potter (meaning: WE GET TO HEAR THE SHIRE THEME! :D), but it'll be number 4 at least.

The controls are responsive.

The minigames are decent.

The bad:

The repetitive-ness.

The massive amounts of bloating.

The burping, which scarred me for life.

39 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

I am a little curious about the logistic of that, as it sounds like the game doesn't know how waterwheels work, but it could just be how it was summarized.

Possibly just how I summarized that.

 

39 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Thanks for sating my morbid curiosity on the subject.

You're welcome!

 

27 minutes ago, Dragoncat said:

The Snuggly Duckling sounds like a Ducktales troll smutfic.

Oh god no.

Out of curiousity, how should I do the scoring for these games, and should I count out Nintendogs and the LEGO games when it comes to said scoring?

[Espurrhoodie]

Ya wanna know something I just realised?

Flynn didn't reveal his name to actually be Eugene.

THEY FORGOT THAT!

[Espurrhoodie]

Espurr plays Tangled! (part 6)

Hey guys, you know how I mentioned that I'd get pissed if my mug broke?

Well my mug broke.

It is now a pencil holder.

Also, my DS is better at holding in my headphones than my tablet.

Okay game, at this point of the movie, Rapunzel should be calling Flynn "Eugene". HIS NAME IS EUGENE! (Although according to the TV series for Tangled that takes place after the movie, his name is actually Harold instead of Eugene and he's a prince. I'm not counting that since the show came out in 2015 I think)

"Maybe they care about spoilers?" You may ask.

..... Let me tell you about how the Wreck-it Ralph game SPOILS THE ENTIRE MOVIE IN THE FIRST FIVE MINUTES! AND THAT GAME CAME OUT BEFORE THE MOVIE!

Sigh. Anyway, Flynn, or as I should be calling him, Eugene, is a wanted man. So we need to paint the posters to confuse the guards into thinking Eugene isn't wanted.

I think Stormtroopers are more competent than these guys.

Okay, painting in the gaps in his teeth here was hard:

I'm not sure if it had something to do with how small the space is or if it's the game's ability to register things.

Okay, reiterating my point before:

THE GUARD WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SEE HER EDIT THE POSTER!

Afteer talking to the incredibly dumb guard, we need to talk to another guard to let us in. I have no clue why, but he looked angry when he said we could get in. I would have taken a picture, but my dog was on me so I couldn't move. Something weird to note is that it says "gain entrance in the village". Isn't Corona (the name of the place, apparently) a kingdom? Unless I'm just dumb.

After getting in, I tapped on some place that caused Rapunzel to say "look at all of those pretty dresses" even though there weren't any dresses visible.

Anyway, a guard mentions that he goes to dinner when the clock strikes the hour and that finding Flynn will be the next guy's problem. So we need to change the clock.

Again, these are the dumbest guards I've ever seen.

Anyway, we find a lantern maker, but unfortunately, he's out of supplies. But he says that he can make more if we give him supplies. Namely, wood, silk, and a candle. Sounds about right. The guy that had the broken mug has a shop where he blows glass where we can get wood. But he wants Rapunzel to help him with making glass unicorns first.

That actually sounds like a fair trade. Anyway, matching minigame time. After completing it, we get wood and stuff for Dgamer. Only one of those is useful. We give the wood to the lantern maker, who tells us that the dress shop might have extra silk. Again, sounds about right that a dress shop would have leftover/excess silk. The dress shop is owned by the mime from the Snuggly Duckling. Surprisingly, there isn't any minigame. He just gives us the silk.

After giving the silk to the lantern maker, he says that the cupcake shop might have extra candles. Uhhh.... I'm not sure if they would have candles for a lantern.

Wait, if my memory is correct, the lanterns didn't have candles in the movie. There was a weird ring on the bottom that was on fire. Like this:

I guess it sort of is a candle, but why would a cupcake shop have that?

It looks like all of these stores are owned by Snuggly Duckling thugs. The store owner says that he can't give us candles until he's finished making cupcakes because he's not sure if he'd have any leftover. So, unsurprisingly, we need to make cupcakes. Weirdly, in the minigame, there are no candles.

Anyway, there isn't anything else the guy can do but make the lanterns, so he tells Eugene and Rapunzel to wait and explore until he's done.

A mother is infuriated because she can't find her kids, so she asks Rapunzel to help her find them. I think these are the girls that braid her hair. After looking behind a bush I see- IS THAT NINA TUCKER?!:

Oh, wow, Nina! I'd make a joke here, but I don't wanna spoil FMA for the one person who doesn't know what happens to Nina.

Anyway, while I was typing all of that, the dialogue I had with Nina skipped. My fault. Don't know what she said. Apparently we found all of the girls even though I only saw two girls when there were three in the movie.

(actually, I think Nina's portrait was just an edit of Nadya's. They fused together. FMA spoiler in the spoiler):

Spoiler

"Not this shit again."- Nina Tucker

At least it wasn't with your dog this time, Nina.

Their mother invites us into her house and asks us about our journey. Somehow this triggers a card minigame. After the minigame, she gives us a brush. I refuse to brush Rapunzel's hair.

Okay, I had a weird convo with Gothel after leaving the mother's house. She told Rapunzel to turn around to the tower and scolded Rapunzel for traveling with a wanted thief. Rapunzel just says "OH" and the convo ends there. Did they plan for more but didn't finish?

Anyway, that's the end of this chapter! The next chapter is the festival of lights! See you on Thursday!

[NinjaMonkey]

On 11/22/2019 at 3:04 PM, Espurrhoodie said:

I should watch ProtonJon's LP of that game.

I'd wait until he finishes it... whenever that will be!

Anyway, I find this to be strangely entertaining, so well done on that!

[Espurrhoodie]

3 minutes ago, NinjaMonkey said:

I'd wait until he finishes it... whenever that will be!

Anyway, I find this to be strangely entertaining, so well done on that!

Thanks!

[Eltosian Kadath]

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

 

..... Let me tell you about how the Wreck-it Ralph game SPOILS THE ENTIRE MOVIE IN THE FIRST FIVE MINUTES! AND THAT GAME CAME OUT BEFORE THE MOVIE!

...I am kinda stunned by how callously cruel that is.

 

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Okay, reiterating my point before:

THE GUARD WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SEE HER EDIT THE POSTER!

You know I am willing to suspend my disbelief about guards being dumb enough to be fooled by those painted wanted posters, but when they literally watch you tamper with them...that is just a step too far

.

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

 

Anyway, a guard mentions that he goes to dinner when the clock strikes the hour and that finding Flynn will be the next guy's problem. So we need to change the clock.

Again, these are the dumbest guards I've ever seen.

I am reminded of the utterly nonsensical Metal Gear 2 puzzle where you have to hatch and owl, and make it hoot to convince a guard that night has fallen.

 

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

The guy that had the broken mug has a shop where he blows glass where we can get wood. But he wants Rapunzel to help him with making glass unicorns first.

That seems rather random, as you would want a fuel that burns better (like charcoal in ancient times) to get the heat needed for glass production. Than again the wood could be there for other uses, like heating the building.

 

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

 

Oh, wow, Nina! I'd make a joke here, but I don't wanna spoil FMA for the one person who doesn't know what happens to Nina.

1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

 

(actually, I think Nina's portrait was just an edit of Nadya's. They fused together. FMA spoiler in the spoiler):

In context that is a rather dark joke. Poor Nina.

 

[Espurrhoodie]

46 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

...I am kinda stunned by how callously cruel that is.

Kinda weird that Disney would do that.

 

46 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

You know I am willing to suspend my disbelief about guards being dumb enough to be fooled by those painted wanted posters, but when they literally watch you tamper with them...that is just a step too far

Yeah!

 

47 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

I am reminded of the utterly nonsensical Metal Gear 2 puzzle where you have to hatch and owl, and make it hoot to convince a guard that night has fallen.

Wait, what? That actually happened? That surpasses this in terms of weirdness.

 

48 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

That seems rather random, as you would want a fuel that burns better (like charcoal in ancient times) to get the heat needed for glass production. Than again the wood could be there for other uses, like heating the building.

Oooh! That does make a bit more sense.

 

49 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

In context that is a rather dark joke. Poor Nina.

I can't believe Nina reincarnated.

[The Roger The Paladin]

7 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Hey guys, you know how I mentioned that I'd get pissed if my mug broke?

Well my mug broke.

It is now a pencil holder.

Feels like one of those things where you pre-empt something by joking about it. I seem to do that a lot.

 

4 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Kinda weird that Disney would do that.

Well.. technically it'd be whoever developed the game. Though you'd think there'd be some quality control there. I mean... I recall that Disney got so pissed when the "Fantasia" game on the Mega drive sucked that they ended up doing the artwork for the Aladdin game that came later. Look at that one's visuals... and tell me how it's came to this. I miss you consistent quality control.

[Espurrhoodie]

On 12/4/2019 at 1:18 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Feels like one of those things where you pre-empt something by joking about it. I seem to do that a lot.

Why do the gods do this to me?

 

On 12/4/2019 at 1:18 AM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Well.. technically it'd be whoever developed the game. Though you'd think there'd be some quality control there. I mean... I recall that Disney got so pissed when the "Fantasia" game on the Mega drive sucked that they ended up doing the artwork for the Aladdin game that came later. Look at that one's visuals... and tell me how it's came to this. I miss you consistent quality control.

Actually, Disney did seemingly have a hand in Wreck-it Ralph. In fact, in this promo (noted primarily for the VA not sounding like John C. Reilly) it uses some footage from the Wii version of the game (which is just the DS version but with better graphics):

Espurr plays Tangled! (FINALE!)

Would anyone be interested in seeing me play Project Mirai DX (or adding it to the poll)? It's not shovelware (in fact, I think it's one of the best looking 3DS games), but it is licensed (it's a Vocaloid game).

Back to the game.

We get the lanterns from the lantern maker, and we're already assaulted with a minigame where we have to make the lanterns.

And then after that minigame, we have to paint the lanterns.

Game, calm down plz. I just started.

After that, I run into another minigame where you have to paint a banner for the festival of lights. Although this one was technically optional, I tapped on the banner so I can't skip it, unfortunately.

Into the festival of ligh- oh shit I tapped on lanterns not realising it would lead to a minigame. It's the Snake clone.

The controls for this minigame.... are bad. They're unresponsive and it's hard to control.

Anyway after talking to Eugene (or as the game still calls him, Flynn even though Rapunzel should be calling him Eugene at this point), we board the boat. And then we talk to Eugene again. And then again. And then we talk to the Stabbington brothers because Eugene left to get thrown in jail. And then Gothel knocks them out. And then we talk to Gothel as she gaslights Rapunzel more. AND THEN WE GET A RANDOM PUZZLE MINIGAME! Where we fix Rapunzel's heart(?).

I think that takes the cake with random, out of place minigames. Wouldn't destroying Rapunzel's heart work as a better metaphor since she's heartbroken at Eugene's perceived betrayal?

And that ends the chapter? With exposition about how the Snuggly Duckling thugs broke Eugene out of prison?

Way to make one the best scenes in the movie lame.

Fuck it. One more chapter.

Okay, apparently there are only three sundrops in this entire chapter.

After talking to Gothel and cementing her status as "Mother of the Year" with Ragyo Kiryuin, Lusamine, and Sonia, I find a random big glowing sundrop I'm supposed to tap.

Not even a minigame where you drag sundrops to Rapunzel. You just tap it and she remembers she's the lost princess and then talks to Gothel about it.

Out of all the scenes I expected to get a minigame made out of (the scene where Rapunzel remembers), it doesn't.

Really weird.

Anyway, Eugene pops in randomly and gives Rapunzel a spiel about listening to her heart and remembering and whatnot. Which somehow segways into a cardmatching minigame. And somehow he hasn't gotten stabbed yet. Even though in the movie, he gets stabbed instantly.

After talking to Go- oh fuck it's the minigame with bad controls.

Okay, it seems most of my issues came from me using the Circle Pad like an idiot instead of using the +Pad, but it's still really laggy (Also, why are we collecting pages?).

Eugene got stabbed in the middle of that, somehow. After helping him cut Rapunzel's hair, Gothel dies and then we have to cry over his dead body. Fact: grabbing the tears was a pain. They moved really jittery, and they had small registry boxes.

OH GOD RAPUNZEL'S HAIR LOOKS AWFUL!:

It looks very obvious that it was edited and it's very jarring. Same thing with that conversation after Eugene gets revived. It's literally just:

"Flynn!"

"I like your hair."

"Thanks!"

After leaving through the window, we end the chapter.

Yeah, I'll finish this game.

We talk to the Queen and- oh for the love of Sothis in a handbag, HER PORTRAIT LOOKS BETTER EDITED THAN RAPUNZEL'S! IT'S JUST A RESKIN OF NINA'S MOM! HECK, NINA'S PORTRAIT WAS A BETTER LOOKING RESKIN!

Sigh. Rapunzel's mom asks her to help with some flower arrangements, so, unsurprisingly, minigame.

I was hoping I could talk to Nadya since it occured to me that I don't think I've taken a picture of her, but it made me do a forced puzzle minigame where I fixed a dress. And then she yeeted herself out of existance.

After a quick conversation with Rapunzel's dad, we can go out of the castle. We are required to go and talk to the guy from the Snuggly Duckling with the warthog.

Speaking of animals, what happened to Pascal? Did the game forget about him?

Anyway, we have another puzzle minigame because the guy's warthog ate his invitation.

After that, we go into the main courtyard and talk to various guests. And a bell minigame, but who cares? After going into the main hall, we talk to Eugene and fix an issue with the seating arrangements. So another card minigame. 

Eugene suggests that he and Rapunzel get some fresh air, and then the King and Queen suggest that Rapunzel paint a portrait of them.

And Maximus. For some reason, Rapunzel still had her long hair.

After all of that, we are finally DONE!

Maybe I can stay on schedule for the next game? Hopefully. I doubt it.

I'll set up the next poll later tonight. I'm a bit worn out.

[Eltosian Kadath]

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Would anyone be interested in seeing me play Project Mirai DX (or adding it to the poll)? It's not shovelware (in fact, I think it's one of the best looking 3DS games), but it is licensed (it's a Vocaloid game).

If the Lego games are in the poll you might as well add it as well.

 

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Although this one was technically optional, I tapped on the banner so I can't skip it, unfortunately.

Into the festival of ligh- oh shit I tapped on lanterns not realising it would lead to a minigame. It's the Snake clone.

Do you think they are trying to punish you for your curiosity, or do they think those extra minigames are supposed to be a reward.

 

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

And that ends the chapter? With exposition about how the Snuggly Duckling thugs broke Eugene out of prison?

Way to make one the best scenes in the movie lame.

They are getting lazy with the minigames in the end huh.

 

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Not even a minigame where you drag sundrops to Rapunzel. You just tap it and she remembers she's the lost princess and then talks to Gothel about it.

...Wow a literal resolve the plot button. This is clearly where the

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

we fix Rapunzel's heart(?).

minigame should have been (or maybe a fix Repunzel's brain minigame?)

 

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Okay, it seems most of my issues came from me using the Circle Pad like an idiot instead of using the +Pad, but it's still really laggy (Also, why are we collecting pages?).

Huh, I guess that makes sense as this was originally a DS game. Hopefully its a little more bearable with more responsive controls. As towards the page question maybe they are symbolic of memories, or its a "story book" reference... yeah its kinda random.

 

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

OH GOD RAPUNZEL'S HAIR LOOKS AWFUL!:

It looks very obvious that it was edited and it's very jarring. Same thing with that conversation after Eugene gets revived. It's literally just:

"Flynn!"

"I like your hair."

"Thanks!"

Jeeze, that is an awkwardly bad edit, and the dialogue only enhances that feeling.

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

HER PORTRAIT LOOKS BETTER EDITED THAN RAPUNZEL'S! IT'S JUST A RESKIN OF NINA'S MOM! HECK, NINA'S PORTRAIT WAS A BETTER LOOKING RESKIN!

That is an incredibly low bar to pass.

 

Edited December 8, 2019 by Eltosian Kadath

[Espurrhoodie]

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

If the Lego games are in the poll you might as well add it as well.

Fair point. I might add Project Diva Switch when it comes out as well.

EDIT: I also figured out the obvious issue regarding me not being able to take screenshots while I'm playing it (since it is a rhythm game) by linking to the PVs on Youtube and then linking a translation.

 

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Do you think they are trying to punish you for your curiosity, or do they think those extra minigames are supposed to be a reward.

Punish me, maybe.

 

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

They are getting lazy with the minigames in the end huh.

It wasn't a minigame, it was tge "end of chapter" dialogue.

 

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Wow a literal resolve the plot button. This is clearly where the

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

we fix Rapunzel's heart(?).

minigame should have been (or maybe a fix Repunzel's brain minigame?)

Yeah. The one place I was expecting a minigame there wasn't.

 

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Huh, I guess that makes sense as this was originally a DS game. Hopefully its a little more bearable with more responsive controls. As towards the page question maybe they are symbolic of memories, or its a "story book" reference... yeah its kinda random.

Only barely.

Not as random as Flynn/Eugene getting stabbed. He gets stabbed by Gothel as soon as he enters in the movie.

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

Jeeze, that is an awkwardly bad edit, and the dialogue only enhances that feeling.

In the movie, he says something like "did you know I've always had a thing for brunettes?" and then Rapunzel cries and hugs/kisses him.

 

28 minutes ago, Eltosian Kadath said:

That is an incredibly low bar to pass.

Nina's looked pretty much seamless, though. I didn't recognise it was an edit of Nadya's until I looked at her face more.

Edited December 8, 2019 by Espurrhoodie

[The Roger The Paladin]

13 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Actually, Disney did seemingly have a hand in Wreck-it Ralph. In fact, in this promo (noted primarily for the VA not sounding like John C. Reilly) it uses some footage from the Wii version of the game (which is just the DS version but with better graphics):

Well... that reflects terribly...

 

14 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

igh. Rapunzel's mom asks her to help with some flower arrangements, so, unsurprisingly, minigame.

I was hoping I could talk to Nadya since it occured to me that I don't think I've taken a picture of her, but it made me do a forced puzzle minigame where I fixed a dress. And then she yeeted herself out of existance.

After a quick conversation with Rapunzel's dad, we can go out of the castle. We are required to go and talk to the guy from the Snuggly Duckling with the warthog.

Speaking of animals, what happened to Pascal? Did the game forget about him?

Anyway, we have another puzzle minigame because the guy's warthog ate his invitation.

After that, we go into the main courtyard and talk to various guests. And a bell minigame, but who cares? After going into the main hall, we talk to Eugene and fix an issue with the seating arrangements. So another card minigame. 

Eugene suggests that he and Rapunzel get some fresh air, and then the King and Queen suggest that Rapunzel paint a portrait of them.

And Maximus. For some reason, Rapunzel still had her long hair.

After all of that, we are finally DONE!

Maybe I can stay on schedule for the next game? Hopefully. I doubt it.

I'll set up the next poll later tonight. I'm a bit worn out.

Who'd have thunk the shovel-ware would have a segment set after the conflict. I don't know what to make of that. Pascal obviously was just blending into the backgrounds, being a chameleon and all.

[Espurrhoodie]

The new poll is up! Vote for what I play next!

Also, sidenote: when I inevitably play Project Mirai I will fangirl about Vocaloid way too much. I love Vocaloid.

[Espurrhoodie]

How do I do a tie breaker? Power Rangers Samurai, Shrek Forever After, and Quest for Zhu all have 1 vote.

[Espurrhoodie]

Okay! Shrek Forever After it is!

Fun fact: I've never completed this game.

Oh boy.

[NinjaMonkey]

On 12/7/2019 at 9:39 PM, Espurrhoodie said:

Wouldn't destroying Rapunzel's heart work as a better metaphor since she's heartbroken at Eugene's perceived betrayal?

The point is that she's heartbroken at Eugene's "betrayal" and you have to fix her heart to make her feel better.

[Espurrhoodie]

6 minutes ago, NinjaMonkey said:

The point is that she's heartbroken at Eugene's "betrayal" and you have to fix her heart to make her feel better.

Ah. That makes sense! Thanks!

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Maybe if you beat this game you can call yourself an Ogre achiever.

[Espurrhoodie]

1 hour ago, Emperor_Siegfried said:

Maybe if you beat this game you can call yourself an Ogre achiever.

Considering that I've never finished this game, I guess you could say that.

I'll do episode 1 tomorrow, but after this week, I'll have Monday and Wednesday free for 3 weeks.

[Espurrhoodie]

Espurr goes through immense pain and suffering playing Shrek Forever After! (part 1)

Well, at least the title screen uses the actual score from Shrek! (The main theme of Shrek, I think there's an actual name for that track, but I can't remember it)

The title screen looks like a shitpost to me. I don't know why, but it does:

According to one of the files I erased, I collected three of something. No clue what.

Anyway, the game begins with Rumplestiltskin (henceforth called Rumple because I don't want to spell that entire name) expositing the beginning of the movie, y'know, the part where he tries to trick the king and queen into making a contract with him and turning their souls into Soul Gems and making them Puella Magi and forcing them to fight witches or something. And.... whatever this is:

This game is voice acted, but I can't tell if the audio is reused from the movie (mostly due to the way Rumple said "and rob me of what's rightfully MINE" sounding familiar), or if they just grabbed random people off the street to voice act. I dunno, I haven't seen this movie in at least 5 years.

After Rumple's rants we cut to-OH SWEET SOTHIS IN A HANDBAG THIS GAME LOOKS AWFUL!:

I'm pretty sure Rapsittie Kids Believe in Santa is higher quality than this. Even then that thing has whatever this is:

And also this masterpiece.

Okay, definitely random people off the street. Shrek sounds like a Scottish Dracula with a cold and Fiona sounds like she needs to check if she's clinically still alive. Actually, both of them do. Fiona asks Shrek if he picked up diapers from the store, and he says no, and comments that he's not the ogre he used to be. And then we're yeeted into a tutorial with Rumple.

While I haven't seen the movie in years, I did watch a rather interesting analysis of this movie (link here) about 5 minutes before I started going through immense pain and suffering. Shrek and Fiona get into an argument before Shrek leaves and meet Rumple. Not that.

Fact: my DS randomly started dying so I had to take a break. Unfortunately, I got booted to the hubworld when I turned it back on. So I had to delete my save because I'm pretty sure all of you want to see my pain and anguish while playing this.

Rumple's model looks terrifying. The fact the photo I took is really close up doesn't help. I don't know why he looks like he's bathing in the moonlight. I thought it had something to do with the fact that I'm in pitch darkness as I'm doing this (it's 6 PM here), but I turned the light on and nothing worked. I think it's my camera.

Okay, Rumple is definitely Walt Dohrn (his VA in the movie). That or a good impersonation of him.

Lovely, my headphones crapped out on me and now I can only hear out of one side. Palutena have mercy on my left ear.

Anyway, Rumple offers to make a contract with Shrek for him to become a- Oh wait I already made a Madoka reference.

I have to write Shrek's name using my stylus. No, this isn't the touchscreen controls being weird, I just have crap handwriting.

 

Anyway, onto the actual gameplay. This game is a 3D platformer. I don't know why, but the controls feel... off somehow. You use the Dpad to move (although I might use the circle pad due to force of habit), the B button to jump and double jump, the Y button to attack, hold L and R (or yell in the mic) to roar, and push X to grab an object to throw it with Y. Decently simple.

Attacking especially feels off. I don't know why, but everythig feels off with the controls.

One of the, I dunno, objectives? Is to collect a bunch of hourglasses. I think they might be this game's currency.

There's a brief portion where you control Donkey and break a bunch of boxes. Unsurprisingly, Donkey looks horrible.

Okay, I'm taking a break from the headphones, my left ear feels weird.

I found a random crystal ball. No clue what that does.

There isn't really much to say about this. It's the tutorial.

I found something called a "memento", which can be used to unlock upgrades to Shrek. Can we upgrade the visuals?

Anyway, that ends the first level!

I checked the menu, and it seems the hourglasses are for unlocking alternate costumes. It also seems like you need 5 mementoes to unlock an upgrade.

That's it for episode 1!

Wait...

I mentioned earlier that on one of my save files, it looked like I collected 3 of something. If my memory is correct, there is a memento in every level.

I only completed three levels of this thing.

I hope this isn't a sign for the future.

[Dragoncat]

5 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

OH SWEET SOTHIS IN A HANDBAG

[Espurrhoodie]

7 minutes ago, Dragoncat said:

That was quick.

[Dragoncat]

9 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

That was quick.

Doesn't take long to make a simple edit like that.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Shrek Forever After, but every time Espurr gets creeped by the visuals, All Star by Smash Mouth plays.

[Espurrhoodie]

27 minutes ago, Emperor_Siegfried said:

Shrek Forever After, but every time Espurr gets creeped by the visuals, All Star by Smash Mouth plays.

If I ever do a video recording of this game, you can bet that I'd do that.