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I think I farted really close in my cat's face.


XRay
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My cat is under my blanket with me, but she keeps pushing my thighs and butt with her paws. I generally do not mind, but she often times relaxes her claws so they poke out of her paws a bit, so sometimes I feel like something spikey is poking me. My cat relaxed her claws more than usual just so it feels more spikey and she just had to keep making biscuits on my butt, and I guess my butt subconsciously had enough of it and let a huge aromatic one rip. I lift the blanket a little to check if she is okay and see if she wanted to come out. She laid there and did not scurry out, but she had her head tilted back a bit as if she looked disgusted and took the full blast of the fart straight to her face.

I know I keep my butt pretty clean so it does not smell, but you can at least nap in a position where you are not putting your whiskers so close to my butt.

 

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One time when I was 8 or 9 I was watching Harry Potter on one of those portable DVD players and my dog was sitting right next to my head and then he let one rip.

A few weeks ago, my grandma was carrying the same dog upstairs with her to bed and then she started smelling something weird and she thought there was a gas leak so she started looking all over the place to see where there was a leak until she realised that it was just the silent but deadly dog.

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4 hours ago, MyLuckyHaiku said:

This topic is the epitome of humanity.

2 hours ago, Hilda said:

I am speechless. This Information is all I needed for my life.

25 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

art.

I am glad my magnum opus made a significant contribution to the world's body of knowledge/literature.

3 hours ago, Espurrhoodie said:

One time when I was 8 or 9 I was watching Harry Potter on one of those portable DVD players and my dog was sitting right next to my head and then he let one rip.

A few weeks ago, my grandma was carrying the same dog upstairs with her to bed and then she started smelling something weird and she thought there was a gas leak so she started looking all over the place to see where there was a leak until she realised that it was just the silent but deadly dog.

I can confirm dogs can be silent but deadly. I had to puppy sit once for my uncle. The puppy did not fart, but the puppy does have a really strong dog smell, and smells a little poopy too. My poor kitty threw up about half dozen times throughout those two days when she walks past my bathroom (that is where I kept the puppy).

27 minutes ago, Captain Karnage said:

For the cat

 

F

Here is another one.

F

I farted in her face again a while later, although it was a much smaller fart. I guess this is how you know if your pet really loves you, if they are willing to sleep under the same blanket as you and smell your fart.

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2 minutes ago, XRay said:

I am glad my magnum opus made a significant contribution to the world's body of knowledge/literature.

Actually me saying "art" was me adding an "art" to @Captain Karnage's F to make "fart" because I have the maturity of a 10 year old.

This is art, though.

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6 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

Actually me saying "art" was me adding an "art" to @Captain Karnage's F to make "fart" because I have the maturity of a 10 year old.

This is art, though.

Fart art is the best art.

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I guess this is the day of F-Arts with animals. My latest pet (and first cat), Nolah (secretly named after Nolan and Noah), ended up with a similar situation to yours today, although the blast was 'probably' smaller. She just lifted the blanked like nothing happened, walked to my side and just looked me into the eyes..with the most disrespect and disgust that I ever experienced.. 

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1 minute ago, Freohr Datia said:

 

take solace in the fact that you're already better than Integrity, who farts on the cat intentionally to assert his dominance

Somebody sig this.

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29 minutes ago, BergelomeuSantos said:

I guess this is the day of F-Arts with animals. My latest pet (and first cat), Nolah (secretly named after Nolan and Noah), ended up with a similar situation to yours today, although the blast was 'probably' smaller. She just lifted the blanked like nothing happened, walked to my side and just looked me into the eyes..with the most disrespect and disgust that I ever experienced.. 

I would love to see that reaction! Sounds funny.

25 minutes ago, Freohr Datia said:

f

take solace in the fact that you're already better than Integrity, who farts on the cat intentionally to assert his dominance

I intentionally farted on my cat once since I was curious to see what her reaction would be.

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11 hours ago, Freohr Datia said:

take solace in the fact that you're already better than Integrity, who farts on the cat intentionally to assert his dominance

My stepdad does that to my mom.

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1 hour ago, Espurrhoodie said:

My mom and stepdad like to antagonize eachother.

Interesting. What is the next step in the arms race? Sneeze on your hand and then lightly slap someone? Scratch your buttcrack and poke someone in the nose with the scratching finger?

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3 hours ago, XRay said:

Interesting. What is the next step in the arms race? Sneeze on your hand and then lightly slap someone? Scratch your buttcrack and poke someone in the nose with the scratching finger?

I don't even want to know.

 

1 hour ago, Dragoncat said:

@Espurrhoodie Your parents are neanderthals and I find that hilarious.

I can't believe that's my gene pool.

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4 minutes ago, Espurrhoodie said:

I don't even want to know.

As the Latin saying goes, "si vis pacem, para bellum"—if you want peace, prepare for war. I recommend researching and investing in a nuclear weapon, such as wearing a pair of socks for a whole month without washing it, and then you will have a pair of weapons that you can dual wield for self defense.

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