screenshot lp The League shall fall if I'm in control - A bad tactician plays Berwick Saga, Ironman mode!

[Benice]

1 minute ago, Spara said:

I've been following along with this LP for a while, finally decided to create an account on here

Hey, hey, hey! Welcome to the forest, we're glad to have you here! Hope you'll enjoy your stay.

Another has joined the Berwick cause! Yeaaah! Let's make Esteban and Owen win the best FE character competition! (I mean, unless you prefer other people. Then vote for them instead.)

And, uh, addendum, I guess.

Spoiler

Not gonna lie, chapters 4 and 5 of Three Houses were SUPER easy. Hoping it gets tougher again, 'cause fighter Lysithea is still viable...

Anyways, trying to take down the Death knight with no Dark Spikes will be tough. Hopin' to let Fighter!Lysithea get the final blow!

Also, fighter Lysithea at base level can deal three damage to the death knight with no rallies or bonuses. Fun fact!

 

[The Roger The Paladin]

 

Spoiler

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

That's... even more than I had thought. Not that map reuse was ever my biggest problem with the game. It's the fact that those maps suck. Bad design, awful cartography.

Hell, even the ones that don't suck every time tend to suck in at least one incarnation. Enemy layout/objectives is a part of map design... and they will botch it in at least one version... more if you count the optional "free day/exp maps" that exist for grinding.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!

Three Houses is the most replayable game in the series, everyone. Four routes! Wow! Bwahahahahahah... Amazing. I admire the willpower of those people who replay the game four times in a row because "muh routes"... 'cause holy shit, there's no incentive to doing it.

I'm worse. I did seven (though there was a break between the first two and the latter five) for all the supports. Not counting Byleth's S supports because...  well, no one in their right mind is playing through a game that many times for Byleth's S supports. The sad part is, right after I'm finished... Jeritza announced. Then I just say "fuck it" and watch his supports on youtube. Regrets? Eh. By the end of it I came up with ways to get old Gilbert or Dedue or Raphael to physical invulnerability (if not magical). So no. I was laughing too hard.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't think I have the talent to draw such a thing.

Plot twist. Elaine is the first of the Magypsies, and the entire putting a dragon to sleep with pins thing was in fact revenge on her parent's parenting. Too far-fetched? I mean I don't think any of the Magypsies ever resembled Elaine... but...

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Which one?

Either Joker making Smash Bros or Tokyo Mirage Sessions depending which you're asking about. You know, the FE x SMT crossover... that ended up something rather different again.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

This looks like a job for Footballman. His prayers can surely bring the hand of the Goddess to protec

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I wouldn't know.

I mean, that helm is distinct. Shame they stopped wearing the capes from Wind Waker, or the resemblance would be stronger yet.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Nah, that guy was just an asshole for the sake of being an asshole. He could've just surrendered. But no, gotta be loyal and die for no reason.

Though when you think about it, Camus' life worked a lot better for him after he died and became Zeke. Funny how he got rewarded for his stubborness, but Nyna got punished in his stead.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Heheheheheh... Wait, but didn't TRS's Simon die to Sylpheed instead? That book ain't an axe!

I mean, Simon Belmont had issues with books too. Just look at the Long Library level in Super Castlevania IV. Or maybe not, because it's an exceptionally easy level for one so late in the game. That said, Drac's a hell of a hoarder. That library level is clearly bigger than my entire house. How many books does this guy have? Then again, is it hoarding if you have the room for it and an eternal life to use it all in? Not to mention hordes of minions and apparently a librarian and library card system for the castle's residents to use (as established in Symphony of the Night)?

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

That is quite the Reeseble pun.

Spoiler

It's also rather multi-layered. See, way back in 1967, Stan Lee and Gene Colan introduced a character quite unlike anything that came before to the Marvel universe. A fellow called Captain Marvel, and alien with Super Strength, flight, leaping abilities, beams (albeit from a weapon). In Marvel Super Heroes 12, aliens of the race known as the Kree came to Earth... with a mission. Their goal was to set the planet up for invasion. The infiltrator would be this captain from the fleet... a Captain Mar-Vell. He was accidentally exposed early in his mission due to the fact his superior officer, Yon-Rogg, had a thing for the good Captain's Fiancee, and "accidentally" activated the Kree's Sentry Robot to destroy the base Mar-Vell's human guise of Walter Lawson was working at/sabotaging. The intent being to remove the captain from his competition. When Mar-Vell stopped the robot in self-interest, he was mistaken for a Super Hero by the public, who heard his name as Captain Marvel. Basically, the series continued in this manner. Mar-Vell trying to sabotage Earth but running into foes that helped maintain the image he was a hero in his other identity. Villains like Super Skrull who was from the Skrull empire, long-time enemies of the Kree, and naturally ready to fight him even if they had the same plan in mind, heroes like the Sub-mariner who had a bad reputation (well deserved, Subby's kind of a dick when it comes to anything not relating to his native Atlantis, but he actually was stopping Mar-Vell's sabotage and got blamed by the media here), and so on. The catch is, this story could only go on so long. Eventually, after about 13 issues worth of increasingly half-hearted sabotage attempts (as he began to grow to like Earth), Yon-Rogg fucked up an attempt to kill Mar-Vell, and killed his fiancee instead. That was it. Mar-Vell would rebel against the Kree Empire like nothing before, and the man once known as it's greatest hero, would become branded it's greatest traitor. Yon-Rogg would die, and Mar-Vell would become the hero he'd been mistaken for. He'd save the universe from the infamous Thanos on no less than three occasions. Which might lead you to wonder, why a hero of such note is forgotten in this day and age. Answer is easy. He died. Published in February of 1982, was the first Marvel Graphic Novel: The Death of Captain Marvel. This was no joke or false advertising. It was no "possible future" tale. Captain Marvel discovered that he had cancer... and he was terminal. He struggled for months across the graphic novel with the knowledge he was going to die in bed, instead of a warrior's death in battle. And so it were, he fell. Unlike numerous other characters in comics, he never came back, Sure, at least five other people would claim the name (one of them going so far as to claim the movie despite being the third shortest serving of the lot). Hell one of these five even thought they were him resurrected due to false memories. But that's all they were. Captain Marvel started his career as naught but a cog in the wheels of intergalactic conquest, a subversion of the hero beyond the stars piece so popularized by Superman. But he died every bit what he originally was created to subvert. And when he died, he took some of the magic with him, because no series using his name on someone else has lasted the thirteen years his did. Unless you count that guy who says Shazam over at the competition... who had the name first.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

What do you mean? I just googled it, and he died in may...

...Oh my God I just realized, I posted that in 10/11... It didn't even occur to me!

Wait, no, sorry, that's 11/10. Because Americans have to do everything backwards. I swear, I'll never understand the Imperial system...

Just going to politely point out September is the 9 in 9/11. ... and we're definitely in September. You posted on 9/10, or September 10th. (I'm acutely aware of the date because a friend has a dog with the day after as a birthday of all things). Point is... just in time for jokes on the next day.
As for why September is the ninth month, October the Tenth, November the 11th, and December the 12 despite the start of each implicating they're two months earlier than they are... you can blame the insertion of July and August into the Calendar in the reign of Augustus Caesar to honor himself and the deceased Julius. By shoving them in the middle of the Calendar, the names for the last four months have become lies by virtue of no-longer applicable pre-fixes. Why the hell they didn't just put them at the end of the year is beyond me. I'm also pretty sure that this is why February is slightly shorter than other months. Because even though the added months, they kept the length of the year. Meaning other months had to be culled. And Augustus was not having a shorter month than Julius. Hence both new months needed as many days.
Now while it's easy to divide 365 days by ten months (36 days for five, 37 for the other five), doing it for 12 is havoc. Long story short, egotistical Roman emporer makes the calendar more complex than it needs to be, and undoing it now would take even more effort.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

There's also status effects. In 95% of RPGs I've played, status effects are useless. You know, things like sleep and poison. In most other RPGs I've seen they miss all the time or barely have an effect. In this game they're paramount. Kinda like how Berwick Saga values equipment and skills above raw stats.

Funny that. Ever play Final Fantasy IX? Because in that one it's entirely possible to beat the whole game at level 1 if you use the right abilities/equipment to take advantage of enemy's preferred elemental options and just ruin their day.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

A panther. Not an anthropomorphic, humanoid-looking panther. A regular panther

I hate panthers. They're frigging assholes in my experience.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

I am glad you feel that way. Never been too into Zelda, myself. Or open-ended games, for that matter. Every single open-ended game I've played has been like this: I play it, I love it, I get hopelessly sidetracked by sidequests for like 60-80 hours, then I get bored and drop it halfway through the story. They're not games that I do not enjoy, but it's difficult for me to commit to them.

Breath of the Wild barely has any story stuff to begin with... and most of it's optional. This game, if you're good enough you can go from the tutorial area straight to Ganon. I mean, you most likely won't win before your weapons break. But that said there's like four dungeons and they're all barely there. This one's all about the optional shit.
I mean, Majora's Mask kind of had most of it's content in optional sidequests too, but the dungeons were definitely a lot bigger there. Point is, Breath of thw Wild has a focus on doing what you want over filling out the story. Beating the dungeons this time amounts to making that last boss easier and getting some abilities.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Always fun when games do that, huh. What, got a brother or sister or anyone who wants to play the game as well? Want to try different things on a different save? Nope, fuck you, gotta find some tedious workaround.

I think if you have multiple accounts on your Switch/Wii U you get a slot if you use them. Not sure.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, guess he'll go down in history as the guy with the warfare metaphors for love and the really weird laugh. Not that his character arc makes him look that much better.

Being an OG Sinon knight isn't good for one's health is it?

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

I've been too sick to edit it, but I wanted to do this pun anyway because I was waiting since last update.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

......

Okay, let me stop here for a moment, because this is the first time I'm seeing this. I swear, long skill lists are my bane... Never have the patience to read. Holy shit, I legit just froze when I noticed Magicbane on the screenshot.

Where was I? Yes, Grauve. He's amazing. And that's not all:

Looks like you were in Grauve danger.

On 9/15/2020 at 5:46 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

This is the best I could manage. So yeah. I kept that guy alive for absolutely nothing. Well... No, that's going too far, but... damnit, two skill points and 60 EXP is awful. Adel, damnit...! Am I gonna have to spend the rest of the game savescumming to get him spear points? I mean... would you guys be all right with that?

Meh... Let's see our turn count.

Well... that went about as well as my health. Every time I start to come good, I end up back at square one and it's killing me. I mean not literally... but some of the changes to basic procedure due to loss of balance from inner ear disruption is ridiculous.

 

[Saint Rubenio]

Part 64 - Axel did nothing wrong.

An announcement. It's not yet 100% certain, but if I am admitted, I will soon begin some new studies. I have to move, too, though not too far from home. I've got a laptop now, so it shouldn't impact the LP in any major way, but given I'll have less time, I might slow down just a tad.

...On the other hand, the start of the year for my course has been postponed. My best guess is that they're having trouble figuring out how to arrange a classroom full of people with computers (not necessarily laptops, either) while mantaining a safe distance. So even if I'm admitted, I haven't the slightest idea when we'll start. I'll keep you informed, if you care at all, but... yeah. Proceeding as normal for the moment.

Okay, maybe he did some things wrong:

Spoiler

On 9/15/2020 at 2:50 AM, Pengaius said:

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Leon? More like Leoff. 

Gosh... darn it, fuck. Aaaarrgh!

Also I'm totally fine with you scumming spear level, heck you straight up hack the game and I'd be cool with it (probably helps that I still have no idea what's going on 90% of the time)

Hah! All right, then.

In other news I've started my first ever proper ironman (lord dies file is over) for shadow dragon (H1 because I'm not a masochist like Roger). I have to do the wooden cavalry next (yaaay. what fun.) and I've only lost Lena, Darros and Hardin, so it's not too bad.

Let me guess: that is no longer the case after Wooden Cavalry.

The only really out there unit choices I've made are dark mage Cord and former-curate, now sage Brother Navarre. 

I hope Navarre dies.

...Nah, but I do hope he gets hurt. Beat the edge out of him.

Sorry for not replying every update but I still can't follow along with the gameplay well enough to say anything more meaningful than death puns. 

That's fine. Any way you can get enjoyment out of this is fine by me. Even if it's... uh, entirely at my expense.

 

 

On 9/15/2020 at 2:55 AM, This boi uses Nino said:

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Bwahahaha! Not so eager to kill me now are you? Uwee hee hee!

Did you just do the Valtome laugh?

...I think I'm seriously eager to kill you, now. I shall do just that. In lieu of an specific address, I believe it prudent to bomb Mexico instead.

I know I know! That's why I'm like "wtf, me!"

I mean, I guess she could go off with someone outside the group. That's a possibility too.

Without more info, that theory sounds good enough.

I suppose it does.

Hmm? Ah! ... god damn it...

Hahahahaha... ahhh, I'm so sorry...

Because shut up was deformed to shat ap and then it went from there...

A-Ah...

I've heard something along those lines, yes... I may look into it.

It'd be a good idea, in my humble opinion.

I'm the Lord and Saviour!
I have your back to the wall!
Strike without grace!
Drink from the wine of the wrath of god
ONEMOREGODREJECTED!

...Scratch that- even Volo isn't awful enough for this.

I looked it up so I know! But 1.- You're still touching a representation of me and 2.- you said you were gonna kill me for real so then you would have to touch me.

Okay, well, I win because I said so. How's that for an argument?

Double eyebrows are an SMT thing.

For extra uselessness. No, seriously, what are eyebrows good for?

...Ahh, they keep sweat and other fluids from getting into the eyes. Interesting...

No it's like a small bug. Not a big demon, no vore present, St.

You know, that just adds to the list. It's not just ryona and vore, it's also microphilia. Three different types of fun in one package! Sure sounds like a neat little series.

Yes, yes. I caught on to that.

Good. It's very important that you do. I wouldn't want to associate SMT to that. Or anything, for that matter.

I see...

I don't see, and I'm glad I don't.

Hmm....

You should give it a try, and tell me how it goes. Since you're the big-shot SMT fan and all...

Ah right...

Yeah, the bad ones were the ones with names.

Precisely why I said that.

Hah!

What is it?

Here, take a look!

huh, like there's a conjunction or sth missing there.

I don't think there is.

This portrait looks epic yo!

Thanks! It wasn't easy to make.

coomer?

How dare you. Take that back before I kill you!

oof....

Yes. Oof is the word.

huh... yeah it's an intense thing I see.

Quite. You don't know it until you try it.

Also I just want to see this through to the end, sucks that this map started out well and now went to shit, all because you didn't want to take out the courier.

In fairness, if I hadn't taken out the courier they still would've showed up.

Fucking finally indeed!

Yeah...

well shit.

No comments on the death portrait? Aww... Well, I'm sure among all the readers, at least someone will react to it.

That is 100,000 though! IT'S A LOT!

...Wait, what?

No, you dummy! The final zero is a D! Y'know, the D from Denarii? It's 10,000D!

And yeah I skimmed over the update sorry but it was too painful and the map was starting to annoy me too. I know you put effort into it but god damn it's too much...

Don't worry about it. This second part got way long, and it was basically just "we get hit 300 times then barely make it out". You didn't miss out on that much.

hahaha 219? WOW hahahaha (yes I didn't quote it I know)

LTC LP this is not.

Also it's unfortunate on the whole Adel not getting more weapon skill thing... damn Kaga knows everything!

Kaga is a dick who hates Adel. But I'll make something out of him, or he'll die trying.

Thank you, and my command is for your well to be fare as well, see ya!

I shall obey. But just this once!

Or given that this at the start of the LP when you quote it. hello!

Hey, how's your day?

 

 

On 9/15/2020 at 5:22 AM, Benice said:

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Oooooof...

Welp, next time! Or your playthrough, actually!

Uhh... Yeah, I've got some news for you, pal.

I would have redone chapter 10 if I'd known, buuuuuuuuut now I'm at chapter 11, so not really worth it after bending over backwards for both Impossible dream and Devil in the valley. Killing all of the assassins is tough!

Yeah, don't even bother.

Or (ab)using Dean! One day, I wanna let Faye land the final blow, as a crit would deal damage, right?

That wouldn't work. If you attack Chaos with Faye in chapter 3, it leads to the scripted battle.

...That said, Faye does damage Chaos a bit in the scripted battle. I wonder what happens if he's low enough that she could kill him there...

They truly are the Gardyans of the fort. Their Simonstrous damage will repel all attacks on Remagen!

I can't come up with an Ozama pun. Damnit all...

Well, death is a bad thing for her. I found that she made the best use out of it, since Aegina makes amazing use of the Blessed Brace, and Percy...Well, I didn't use him. I was going to, since Arrowbane + magic should be amazing, but his first impression in my recent run was to get crippled by an archer...

I see... Well, that just means you don't have to endure his copious missing.

No, actually! Not at all! I deployed him for the first time in chapter 6's main mission! My main party is:

• Faye, level 21. Casuals: Zweihander fixes almost all of Marcel's problems, it's great! Pros: Zweihander is a really good weapon for Faye.

Galaxy brains: Screw swords, Derrick is best unit.

• Enid, level 22.
• Aegina, level 21, (STILL ONLY HAS 21 WIND MAGIC WHYY)

Friendly reminder that the one time I got her to promote it was in chapter 12-2.

• Estie, level 21.    47 Bow skill is nice for Pascanion. Although he gets aim at about the point that he reaches 100 hit without help.

Estie... Pffffft! Not gonna lie, I used him in my second run and I quite liked him, but... Hard pass on the Pascanion. Devil bow is just... no, thanks.

• Ruby, level 17-Gave her the Raze Etoile-Mostly because she's my primary tank.
• Adel and Leon, level 14 apiece
• Reese, level 11
• And now, Kramer at level eight, (I WANT THE ALBATROSS, I'M MISSING ONLY TWO ERZIE ITEMS-THE DARK AXE AND THE ALBATROSS! WHERE DO I GET A DARK AXE?!)

Chapter 12.

• And Faramir at 17-I'm just tryin' to get him for Faye's ending.

Should be as easy as hiring him a couple times. Maybe feed him some food at the Pavilion.

Also, I checked, definitely don't have Clifford permanently recruited-Still in the tavern. Do I need to hire him to permanently recruit him?

No, you just need a promoted Ruby and he's instantly recruited. You must've also seen all the other Clifford and Ruby events. If you missed one, that's too bad.

Eyyy! No, not at all. I just wanted something common enough to hopefully pique your interest. (Although at this point it's probably just out of obligation to make me happy.)

To be fair, Elaine x Rick Ashley does sound like a pretty fun ship.

Hey, in other news, I finally got to play Three Houses! It...Hasn't been too bad so far-Nothing spectacular, but serviceable enough.

Of course, everything seems good after FE9, even with buffed enemies. I may do it again sometime, with scaling buffs rather than flat ones.

Hah!

Then again, I am using Mage Raphael and Warrior Lysithea as my main two units, soo...

That's one of 3H's legit good points. The customization. Sure, it does ruin the difficulty and makes Ironmanning unfeasible, but it's fun to build up unlikely units.

(YES I'M PLAYING VW FIRST, I LIKE PLAYING AS THE IRRELEVANT CHARACTER!)

I mean, fine by me. I can understand why people would like Claude. He's a complete waste of a character, but he's hot, so he appeals to the fanbase.

...in my case, Claude makes me doubly angry because his fellow students are my favorites, but I can't stand him. This resulted in me stealing half of his students in all my runs. And then murdering him with glee.

...Or, well, I intended to. But I quit CF to have more time to play Sun God's Wrath, upon realizing that I was having a stupid amount of fun with the ol' fangame whereas with 3H I was just... "meh", is the best way to explain it.

It appears that I erred in my math-If you played the game A route/A route through to the good ending, there would be 31 maps played-Six additional ones also can be played out for a total of 37 maps-You will always miss six maps if play through the game, for a total of 84% shared maps in every playthrough.

Meanwhile, in Three Houses, there are 53% shared maps. I apologize.

Why must you disappoint me so, Benice?

(I mean, you do have to play through the same 12 maps 48 times to get all four routes, though...)

Yeah, still really shitty, considering the replayability was one of the most marketed points.

I totally agree-I also don't know if Azure Moon uses the same maps as Silver Snow and Verdant Wind at all-pretty sure CF is the only one without any shared maps. Besides the first 12, that is.

CF and AM seem to be the best routes, CF being the most unique and AM the most solid of the recycled there. SS is a bad copy of AM, and Claude is a bad copy of SS, so it's like... it gets shittier and shittier.

Well. My hope of you showing that citizen request didn't go very far...

No it didn't.

I like how he literally just Validars it and comes back to life. Twice. He does it in Klamp's map too.

Yeah, that was one hell of a nasty surprise.

Also, does the arc just end if you don't capture Luveil, or does she get Theodore'd?

I have no idea, actually. I imagine it does, so please, be sure to capture her.

Y'know, I don't even mind Luveil getting this portrait, she deserves it even if she did Tsundere it all along.

To be honest, I love Luveil's portrait. Considered using it for this one thing, but eventually prefered to put Webber to good use once more.

What I hear the teachers say when they're talking about math.

Pffft!

He'd better get a spot in the death list.

Well, I mean...

No, see, he's actually Grauve and he drowned but he didn't get the memo and had some great quotes after that.

Hahahahah... Honestly though, it'd kinda sad that Grauve is the best part of Esteban's character arc. Heck, not as much as Burroughs, but he, too, feels like an irrelevant secondary in his own arc.

0/10 UPDATE, NO SUPER ENGINEER

Uh...

-12 UPDATE OUT OF TEN

Are you going to do this every time I lose Faye?

Yo, twinsies! Only I didn't grind Adel up...I'm just that good, y'know?

Yeah, right. Psch!

(Okay, well, 187 turns IIRC. My more recent attempt was 65 turns.)

Ahahahahaha... Well, it's a bit less than me, I guess.

Anyways, that was a really great update! Thanks!

No, thank YOU for the compliment!

 

 

On 9/15/2020 at 8:42 AM, ranger016 said:

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I managed to get the lancers to split up and two of them went north while the rest went south along with the ballistae, made this part a lot easier and probably why I managed to beat this map, also probably why my Burroughs didn't die here.

Yeah, you definitely lucked out a bit there.

By the way, I am currently trying to beat Chaos in chapter 3 on my rerun to get Volo's event and it is really tough, Dean deals only 10 damage with vangeful, Axel needs to block the pirate reinforcements so I can't just pulverize him. Atleast Chaos doesn't seem to attack Ward while he is guarding the priest or this would be impossible.

Why not use someone else to block the pirate reinforcements? Just keep Axel there until someone else can get to the fort, then replace him. I mean, probably too late for advice now, but...

I probably should have just get Faye killed but don't want to kill her off for someone I don't even care about. 

Yeah, that's true. I think she dies permanently in chapter 3, too. That's really shitty.

so only Adel and Sherlock remains of the original Sinon knights, Ward and Reese doesn't count since they are immortal.

Holy shit, that's so depressing...

Another day, another Ruben LP ruined by horsemen..

I'm cursed, I tell you. Cursed! You should know, you've been there from the start. Even if you never said much.

It was just waiting for you to let your guard down.

Typical fuckin' chapter 9.

I was really surprised to see you never tried it before, it is by far the best bow that can be gotten so early.

I was seduced by the Apeiron's increased cripple chance.

Well, he did manage to beat Reese, the war would already be over by now if not for Gram.

And he died right after...

The war would be over by now if I didn't have the ability to turn back time.

Now this is the Ward I know, he holds the record of the highest amount of deaths in my army...even more than all of the army combined. Makes me wonder exactly how bad I am at these games.

Well, I mean... Ward is pretty difficult to down at first, but as the game progresses his inability to level up starts to catch up to him. He never becomes outright bad or anything, but he does become a more average unit by the end.

Poor Faramir...

For someone I refuse to hire, I sure use his services a lot.

As far as I remember, if the other archer was still alive he does give you a warning but it doesn't make sense everyone else just ignores their boss and goes after them.

It's not like they couldn't program them not to attack - Grauve himself never does, I tested it!

Saphira could be useful since she doesn't die and seems grow much faster than Izerna. She had the same amount of light skill as Izerna at lv 5 while Izerna was lv 10 promoted. Not to mention her promoted skill makes the final map much easier. As for Izerna, promoting her gives you the cripple healing orb which Owen can use as well at lv 30.

Lv 23* don't forget he has Expert. Unless it randomly works differently for Izerna's orb, he should be able to use it soon-ish.

Faye: Am I a joke to you?

Hah! Right, I forgot about her there...

That's...not 10k either, that's 1m. I can't believe the one chest I never tried to get had to have one of the most useful things in the game, I realised too late that Axel can't open chests and I didn't bring any thieves.

Yes you are STILL blind, I wish dad ever gave me this much find.

Wha-- another one!? I didn't think that D was so difficult to tell apart from the zeros!

Anyway, yeah. That's a D. It's only 10k. Which, hey, still. Plenty of money, since this chapter didn't give Dad Funds.

So much time wasted for just 2 skill points...and to think I was thinking of doing the same tactics too in my current run.

Yeah, it doesn't work so well, I'm afraid. It'd probably be better to just savescum on every chance you get.

That's honestly pretty clever.

Right? I was rather blown away, myself!

That's a pretty good amount as well...

1000. Again, the last thing is a D. This isn't Shadow Dragon.

Just amazing...

I don't imagine Volcens will be too pleased, given his love for arbitrary time limits.

 

 

On 9/15/2020 at 1:02 PM, BrightBow said:

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Or just keep using small shields? I tried using M-shields with Elbert, but even with Shieldfaire he ended up eating too many attacks for my liking, so I gave up on that.

I know what I'm doing.

......

Ahahahahahahaha!

I know what I'm doing - Ruben, 2020.

Farewell Virido. You really were Kaga's biggest troll move.
Although apparently Aethin made that one a lot worse then it was. Still a troll move, given you had no way of telling that you were going to get quizzed.

I actually pulled it off on my first try. It caught me off guard, but I was able to remember the correct spelling.

On the bright side, with Leon and Christine dead, there is a lot less reason to deal with all the hide enemies in chapter 10.

Yeah, that's about the only good thing. I don't have to deal with as many sidequests. They weren't even that good - miracle on Reese is okay, I guess, but he's already immortal, and

 

...Okay, maybe it'll hurt to lose a blood ruby (that's what Serenes calls it anyway, might be different in the translation). I don't even know what it makes, but considering the only other repairstone left in the game is tied to making all of Lumiere's items... I seriously hope it's not used there.

Well, this stings. Too bad you can't even get that free repair from getting all the bounty targets anymore.

Yeah... I'm honestly worried I won't be able to repair it, now. I want to preserve the Rossweisse more than anything. By God, what a bow.

Indeed.

I'm glad we agree on something, for once.

Although Axel might at least be able to hit things with the Sun Brace.

What's your problem with Axel? What about Perceval, huh? Perceval couldn't hit the broad side of a barn, but I don't see you nagging about it!

The map started with the revelation that Sinon's strategy of starting a suicidal surprise attack was already leaked to the enemy. So I'd say it already started out pretty bad.

That is true. I wonder who leaked the info... Hmmm... Could it be...

 

Virgil!?

I know, right? You'd think it would be at the shoals or somewhere else where you guys have a disadvantage in terrain.

Haha, nah that'd be stupid.

How? He stands behind the Gigas Knight. Unless he moves out of the way, Ward can't reach.

Oh, hush, you with your... logic and... reason... I know what I'm doing!

She just talked all this good shit about her new powers and her friends... and yet it's still good old Faramir keeping her from an early grave.

Not a word out of you, Faramir. Not one word.

......

...Sigh... You know, maybe you were right. Maybe I should just go back home, and--

Your friends are worthy warriors, and so are you. The tactician is the problem...

Huh?

I said, the tactician is the problem.

R-Right... sorry, I'm not used to hearing you say much.

Well, one of these days I'm going to grab that guy by the cape and he's going to hear a couple of things.

......

May have been better to try Overwatch instead.

C'mon, again? Can't I do anything right, ever?

If Sylvis had stopped this guy with Overwatch, not only would Reese have been left with enough HP to survive a Gigas Knight strike, but also the Gigas Knight wouldn't even have been able to reach this turn since the Archer wouldn't have been able to move out of the way.
Since she has Ember arrows, she would still have been able to stop the Gigas Knight next turn with Overwatch.

Yes, that would all have been great, if I wasn't allergic to the idea of hurting the knight. And look, if I had damaged him there, Adel would've gotten even less points out of him.

Backseat gaming is fun.

Hahahahahahah! Yes, but you know what is even more fun than backseat gaming? Getting backseat gaming'd! I should know, it's so much fun to have someone to tell you that you're bad and why!

That's 9 Repair Stone charges, btw.

Okay, maybe I won't repair it.

Yeah. Would be nice if Sinon's knight could afford a nicer grave for Leon then the shoddy one Clifford got.

We'll just have to check it out.

The Doru joins the Pike as one of these weapons that's nice in concept but just ends up being a bit too underpowered.
I mean, you need 4 other guys just to reach the same accuracy as an Iron Spear. Even with a whole group of enemies with that thing, it just doesn't add to all that much.
I guess you could get up to 6 Defense from it, but then you are completely surrounded and can't be reached anyway, and the guys surrounding you don't get the same boost, so I'd say it still amounts to a whole bunch of nothing.

Doesn't help that it's not easy to get your hands on Dorus.

Couldn't you just keep the door closed until you are done with the Gigas Knight and then just talk to the engineer without fighting this guy?

But... But the chest! The houses! The spy, the bag! And... goddamnit, my boss kill! You don't just leave the map without killing the boss!

I think the damage reflect can only occur at 0 range. Heck, I didn't even see the reflect happen until my 3rd run.

Ah... Well, that's good to know.

You'd think he of all people would realize that this is just not a good line. Like enemy soldiers would be all that opposed to killing you and take degrading pictures with your corpse.

I mean, last time someone used the line on me, I was literally unable to take the fort even after he died. And... in fairness, we didn't take Remagen back, either. We just brought down the bridge, so now they're stuck on the other side. Even though the... the island is right there. Maybe they just have nobody who knows how to operate the bridge? We did leave it up...

I think you missed part of his orders:

Hahahahahahah... The fact that you used comic sans just kills me.

Gotta love how they are armed just so they can die easier.

So much garbage...

A yes, because bailing out on turn 20 is the mark of a good healer. And Owen is so much better at tanking hits with that +2 HP of his.

Btw, Izerna also learns Versatile after her extremely quick promotion. So she can have Holy active at all time.

......

Okay, maybe I'm starting to regret some things. I had no idea she learned Versatile...

But I've come this far, and I must stick to my guns. Owen best healer. You wait and see! Mark my words, and mark 'em well: I, Ruben, shall be the one to prove you wrong, or Owen will die trying!

Eh, he'd somehow have lost Magicbane before his next appearance anyway.

True enough.

And also because he is the only one who doesn't come rushing you down.
Unfortunately Kaga won't be this nice when this kind of objective appears next time.

Sheesh...

Maybe Aesimus is the latin word for "stool"?

Call an ambulance. I'm choking to death. This is too good.

The power of the Pickaxe.

You know what I would've liked? If the pickaxe was an Erzheimer item. Just... a regular ol' pickaxe, among all the other rare weapons. Mind, in the context of this game, the pickaxe would also be a rare weapon. I think there's only, like, two enemy axemen hidden away in early sidequests who use it.

Leon is dead. Faye is dead again. Reese and Ward died in several alternate realities. Tons of valuable equipment wasted. And it's only the start of the month. Poor Reese.

Well, he should've known better than to hire a tactician such as myself.

...Wait, never mind, he didn't. I just forced myself into the position by booting the game.

 

 

On 9/16/2020 at 12:18 PM, Aethin said:

The chat with the spy is incredibly dull in the Japanese version, so I took some artistic liberty here.

Literal translation:

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Spy: You're the Lord of Sinon, right?

Reese: You... I see. You're the undercover agent, right?

Spy: Yes, I am called Ethan... though that is just a pseudonym. Please deliver this document to General Brighton.

Reese: Understood, I'll do it. What will you do after this?

Spy: I will move on to my next mission. I shall pray for your victory, milord. Now then, I must go...

Bleh... Yeah, good call.

My translation explained:

  Hide contents

Spy: ...Are you the one who fights with ardor?

The name Reese comes from Old Welsh ris, meaning "ardor" or "fiery one."

Spy: The foxes know my name as Ethan, but the earth and sky know otherwise.

Foxes are intended to represent other crafty individuals (=spies), due to their association with tricksters in mythology. Likewise, "earth" and "sky" are often mother and father deities (Gaea & Uranus, Nut & Geb, Dyauṣpitṛ & Pṛthvīmātā, An & Ki, etc.), hence 'Ethan' is not the name that the spy's parents gave to him.

Spy: These words must be delivered to the Town of the Radiant Summit.

The name "Brighton" /'bɹaɪ.tən/ originally comes from a town in England. The town's name is shortened from Brighthelmstone /'bɹaɪ.təlmz.tən/, thought to be derived from Middle English Briȝthelm's-Town /'briç.təlmz.tuːn/, "Briȝthelm" being a person's name. The name Briȝthelm, meanwhile, reflects the Old English name Beorhthelm /'be͜orxt.xelm/ which is a transparent compound of beorht + helm(a) = "bright helm," as in "glorious leadership." (Here I've creatively reinterpreted "helm" as "summit," hence "radiant summit.")

Spy: This crow is called to new murders, though he calls back to thee fondly.

Crows, like foxes, are customarily associated with tricksters. "Murders" is a double entendre with (A) the fact that groups of crows can be called "murders" and (B) actual murders, since y'know, he is a spy. "Calling back fondly" is just meant to mean that he's being friendly as he leaves.

Spy: Farewell, fiery heir to the son of Aesimus...

As Ruben noted, Aesimus is the father of a mythological figure named Sinon, hence "fiery heir to Sinon." As for "fiery," this again refers to the meaning of Reese.

I love the amount of effort you put into this one exchange.

The spy's message, on the other hand (which I assume we will see in the next update), is more or less directly translated from the Japanese version, i.e., it's nonsensical.

Wait, you can actually see the spy's message? I was unable to figure out how to do it... You can read Lynette's letters from the "key items" list, but not the spy's report! Either it's unused text, or I'm missing something here.

As for some comment that I don't feel like finding again--I actually didn't write any of the unit reviews on the FE Wikia except for Derrick's, and even that was adapted from an earlier version.  Most of the Berwick pages were not written by me, in fact! Just the bad ones.

Oh. Well, shoot. Who be dissing my man Adel, then?

 

19 hours ago, Golb89 said:

[Addendums]

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How dare you. That axe belongs to either Axel or Derrick! Are you called Axel or Derrick? No, right? Then fuck off!

 

*Insert Volcens and/or his purple omologue Ruben the less-than-ideal tactician here*

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iplsih/pre_cc_meme/

You serious? That's not accurate at all! I'm not ever "willing" to take such risks! It just... happens, goddamnit! This definitely fits Volcyboy better!

 

[Replies]

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I DO know of it, in the sense i've read the title, the cover picture, the synopsys and then i never looked at it ever again because i hate that kind of anime.

...Wait, what? You hate that kind of anime? Okay, color me baffled, because I was NOT expecting that at all. What even do you mean by "that kind of anime"? Mystery? Anime where people die? Is that it? Wait, but isn't that exactly the kind of story GFL has...?

Basically, i know it as much as you know Gintama. Sort of.

Ah.

...Well, the most I know about Gintama is that it features Caillou punching people in the nuts, and that I wouldn't enjoy it. So yeah. You're probably right.

That is not the counter-reference I expected. Especially from an Italian man.

As a matter of fact, you might be right...

Hah! I'm a genius. A genius, dammit!

Uh uh...(2)

Oh, please...

https://youtu.be/z1WsM1EmPDc?t=5009

Half-naked lady says some vagely sexual things

My face:

Nope, but they can have serve the same "purpose" in certain stages...

Pfffft...

(Also, not pictured among those was the Command Tower, which works pretty much the same as those obelisks)

Ah.

That's still too wholesome, and even an ass like myself has to admit it.

No.

Hah! What a shame.

Nope, but she met someone who's very close.

Maybe.

Call me blind, but I cannot see Derrick anywhere. I can only see Satan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kp1z8EzZ5Hs

If he had a hammer, he'd still be profoundly ineffective. Hammers in KagaSaga aren't like hammers in FE. In Vestaria in particular they suck.

Well, you can't actually miss in AK so...

(You can dodge and crit though, but only with the appropriate skills and/or talents)

I'm sure Perceval could manage to miss even if it was impossible.

 

Ahh, I spoke too soon, didn't I...

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/hsn8h5/stand_by_me/

Kitties are too cute.

(And this too, free of charge)

There's no kitties there! Get out!

Nope, but as you mentioned before she might be instead.

Nah, that one's just Valter.

 

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/irpn39/aaaaaaaa_by_啊纯在被窝/

I don't get this one. Is there an AK character called AAAAAAAAA? Because, to be honest, it wouldn't surprise me, given some of the names...

Speaking of:

https://youtu.be/ioxPFmrIuJU?t=1312

"Wait, that guy is a doctor?!"

"Always Aak been"

You know, I've never quite understood the "always has been" meme. What, have we fallen so low that now we're turning random phrases into memes?

(Ironically, he is classified as neither medic, supporter nor even sniper...)

(Oh, and fans ship them)

Please. Do you not know the fanbase you are a part of? It'd surprise me more if they didn't ship everyone with everything!

Also:

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iqrkwd/gavial_doesnt_hurt_anyone_she_just_initiates/

Hah!

And since you mentioned him:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/it3jpj/triggerhappy_me_every_goddamn_cc/

 

No, seriously, what's with Arknights and TF2? They have little to do with one another! One is a gacha, whereas the other one is good!

Uh uh...(3)

(JJ: she'll just fillet your fish)

(I mean, that's very clearly an anime about fishing: what else did you expect?)

I don't know what to expect from anime in general. Except for women in sensible clothing. That is something I do not expect from anime in general.

That's a heron though.

Well, pelicans, herons... it's all the same.

(Also, that's not actually how things went: notice how i purposedly bothered to hide the timer in all those screenshoots even though it's usually a massive pain in the @ss to do so)

Ahhh, you sneaky little bastard you.

[Addendum]

When i first read this i thought you were talking about Kramer after he pulled an "Aakrkis" on you.

When did Kramer pull an Arkis on me, though?

Like this. And this.

Waifus. That's your answer. Shitty business practices are tolerable because... waifus.

...Yeah, sorry. Still hate the whole genre.

This on the other hand...

A D E L

Yeah, that's sensed and all, but is there anything in the game that explicitely tells you who can and can't ride horses?

Yes.

See those icons below the unit's equipped weapon, on the upper right corner? If there's a horse, the unit has a mount. If there's a horse with a red X on it, the unit can mount but has no steed to do so. If there is no horse, the unit cannot mount ever.

Not really: she just happens to find lots of swords lying abandoned around and sell them for cash (which the other characters will end up spending entirely on food and alcohol)

Ah.

...Can you explain the pussy window, though?

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/hdoyye/just_walk_around_the_amusement_park_with_skadi_i/

Clearly you cannot. But that's all right - it's not like anyone can.

But it does make it massively flawed to the point you'll feel stupid for having played it up to that point.

Hah! Guess I was too stupid to feel stupid, then, because I legitimately enjoyed the final battle of TLP. It's better than generic dragon!

TLP's finale was pure garbage: nevermind TSGW's, even Corrupt Teocracy's was nowhere as awful!

I disagree. But it's all right. You can hate the games I like, and I can hate the games you like. I'd ask you to not be negative every single time I bring up TLP, but then again, our whole dynamic is that you constantly talk about the games you like and I hate on them, so... meh. Hate away. Bottom-line, everyone's entitled to their own opinion.

You know the difference, though? TLP does not prey on ludopaths and children with a thinly-veiled gambling system.

Hah!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kemono_Michi

Watched it when it aired last year (it was my favorite of the season for reasons you wouldn't understand), so no: i simply got reminded of it the moment i read "stolen sword".

I see. And you are correct: I do not understand. This ain't my cup o' tea.

Though, thinking about it, the MC would have definitely gotten along with Vanilla (and every single other AK character, but her in primis)

Oh, the pantyshot... W-Why must anime be like that!? Cease! Cease!

You are welcome.

Yeah, all right.

 

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If by "investigate" you mean "crush a bunch of heads with an axe"...

You'd still be wrong. We failed miserably.

New gal? Eh... At least she's covered up, but I don't think I like the design.

Still like 5x older than the UE.

(And it took 5x the time for it to finally crumble in pieces...)

Oh, dear...

 

 

This one has an attitude I can get behind. And a name that sounds like a name. And a design that is... pretty good, actually. What little exposed skin there is is exposed in a pretty badass manner. Even the dumb animal ears are barely visible. Not bad, Arknights!

(Yes, I know you've showed her before - last time I didn't really stop to check the design out)

Meanwhile, elsewhere...

Hah!

 

Bagpipe? Really?

I won't. I've a right to be lazy.

Until the brave die because their tactician is bad.

Me every time you reply.

Nah just kidding.

Or am I?

Nah I am.

You go first, generic anime girl.

Pffft! Okay, I think like this one.

Shut up and get out. Your name is so dumb I cannot stand it.

Oh, no. Not one of these. I hate these...!

Yes. This one. This one's better.

https://www.awkwardzombie.com/awkward-zombie/study-aid

Hah, I've seen that one! It's pretty hilarious.

Meanwhile, elsewhere...(2)

Hoarding in a nutshell.

I agree, they're bastards, each and every one of them.

Oh, fuck you up the ass. And your hat, too!

I wish it wasn't.

Best character confirmed. I still hate the game, though. But I like her in particular. Kinda like Hanneman, though... not quite the same.

Hush, you.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fzqyv8/a_cat_is_fine_too/

Bleeehhh... I mean, we still have Ward. Not that he can be used in half of the game's maps, but...

 

 

I still don't think I like your jacket. It looks weird.

See, this jacket is a lot cooler.

 

This one doesn't even know how to use a jacket!

BerwickSaga.png

 

I really don't think you qualify, though.

 

 

Kinky.

 

 

Pff-- Plod? That's a new one...

 

 

> Me when I see buff anime gal with an attitude

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New one? This one seems... rather unremarkable, actually. She does nothing spectacularly wrong or right. She just... exists. Cool trenchcoat, though.

 

Yes, I agree.

[Bonus]

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https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iszcva/w_in_three_houses_uniform_by_tao/

Yes! Two games I despise, together! That is what I needed this morning! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to commit suicide. Toddles~!

 

 

18 hours ago, Dayni said:

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I did a thing!

True, but you can't buy what's never being sold.

Yeah, that's exactly the problem.

I fully expect Ireland's going to hugely lose out from Brexit on the Ninty front as we're grouped with the UK as it is.

Oof... I'm so sorry, you guys.

That meme is barely 2 years old and I'm pretty sure someone's still referencing it.

It probably is still being referenced over at DeviantArt.

I have to wonder who to ask about map design and figure out just how objective that can be, I certainly am out of the loop.

All jokes aside, I don't think 3H has the worst map design in the series, but out of the games that I've played, it's definitely the most mediocre. That's a good word for it: mediocre. It's not so terrible that it makes me want to fly to Japan and bomb IntSys's headquarters, but the maps are so tiny, so straightforward and there's so little going on most of the time that it's just... a snoozefest from start to finish.

Not helping is the huge mistakes they made with the Kill Commander maps, where half the time the commander is hiding behind a wall 8 tiles away from the team, so you can just warp up to them and end them in one or two turns (looking at you, Cornelia and Hubert...). And since there's unlimited supplies of warp in this game, well... It's perhaps even more warpskippable than Shadow Dragon. Which is sad.

So yeah, that's my honest-to-God, no-joke opinion. They're not horrible, but they're not great, or even good. They're just... serviceable enough, that if the game had no other flaws, I could probably overlook this one. A shame that is not the case.

I was getting most of them for paralogues anyway, so by the time I got to chapter 12 and realised it was more than possible to just finish getting the two I'd skipped over I decided to just do it. Dorothea might be involved in getting the opera group, maybe.

Ahh, I understand. Well, good luck with the last few recruits, if you still have any pending.

I was actually musing which way I'd prefer in gameplay and honestly I have no answer.

Ahhh.

Well, in this case it goes without saying, but I like the way the game handles it.

I have never seen this generic man before in my life.

Flashback time!

Quote

In the church, we find one of the few scenes in this game without a background.

Also, a portrait-less person! I pondered deeply on how to handle these situations. I've decided to use a neutral portrait for all of them. I pray that my solution is to your satisfaction.

...You can't go another step, can you? Very well. Let's rest at this church.

I have to keep going... We have to mend the schism the Pope has wrought on our Church... That means first freeing our brothers, but if I succumb before I can even do that...

You need only resist for a short while longer. Once we reach Navaron, I believe that the Verian Archbishop may be able to free you from the curse.

It will never work... Even an archbishop wouldn't have the power to undo Pope Urbanus's magic...

Oh! Razites! But that doesn't make sense, that guy's not wearing a garbage bag, and his flesh isn't bleach-white! And they don't seem like they're the bad guys!

Wait, someone's coming... Stay here and hide for a moment!

Not sure if I've linked it at any point, but this is also the theme that plays in the temple in Narvia.

...I suppose not. Perhaps I'll make myself some tea to ease the soreness of my journey...

O-- HOLY SHIT HE APPEARED OUT OF NOWHERE, RUN GRIMM RUN IT'S A TRAP! A TRAP!

An... absolutely beautiful... trap...

I mean, we don't have much evidence the extremists aren't on top.

They very much are, but what I was trying to say is that they're not everyone in the church. It's not great or anything, but I like that they at least try to make the evil church less of a completely evil church (even if I do feel they were more successful in TRS, thanks mainly to Zieg).

They didn't have to start a romantic relationship, but all that being said I don't blame here.

It's not like he remembered he had a family, until it was too late that is.

I also forgot to mention Fates Arthur's Japanese name is Harold. Yep. Either that is a brilliant tier coincidence or holy shit the one localiser who knew Berwick has too much power. Because it's not like Arthur was actively known outside those who'd played Genealogy and Harold is here.

...Oh wow... I already knew about that, but I hadn't realized... Hah! Fuckin' IntSys, I swear. What's next? Will the next big bad in FE be called Reese?

Incidentally, this is why I always find it funny when people give fan translators hell for not religiously sticking with IntSys's name translations. For example, the whole Vergil debacle. I mean, sure, IntSys said Belf, but Belf sucks so much... Also, the Safy/Safiya/Safie nonsense with Project Exile. It's true that the translator's reason for changing Safy was kinda iffy, but Safy is a really weird-looking name (looks more like a hypocorism than a real name), and the fact that they also transliterated Carrion speaks volumes of how little they care about properly translating the names for the Heroes ballot list.

Add to all that the fact that IntSys have screwed up proper translations completely many times in the past, and, well... I just don't see why anyone should invariably look to the Heroes CyL list for names. Theirs should not be taken as the Word of God, since they're so prone to making mistakes or going for the easiest transliteration. Especially when translating the Kaga games - since Kaga isn't even a part of IntSys anymore, IntSys's name translations are no more official than the ones the fans can come up with.

You left the cliffhanger.

When will the day come that I stop being given opportunities for cliffhangers...

Meanwhile I can get too dragged into the main quest and miss opportunities as a result (See: my experience with ESIV: Oblivion)

Hah, that's the opposite problem!

Really though, these games are too big for me. I like them, but I can never experience everything before I get tired of the gameplay loop.

What's worse is it's my brother's copy and I don't want to be taking it off him as a result, though he seems surprisingly accommodating about that.

Well, I hope he continues being so!

RIP Deathmatch.

Ouch...

Jeez I don't know how to respond to this.

That was such a lame anime moment.

Bwahahahahahahahahah...

Fun fact: Here in Spain, we get these American reality shows, but for some reason each and every one of them have the most pathetic dubbing work ever. How bad is it? Well, you can hear the original voices underneath the spanish dub. I'm not kidding.

Not only that, but it seems all of these shows are dubbed by the same company, because they have two old guy voices, one woman voice, three male adult voices and one child voice. I'm not kidding, everyone sounds the same in every American reality show that's brought here.

I guess he decided going for Ward was reliable enough because reset option?

I don't know, but I'm still angry 64 updates later.

Adel getting goodish level ups.

He's doomed.

Well... Not today, anyway.

How come it's horsemen are one of the most reliable reservoirs of salt in this series of LPs?

It's true for all of them.

Hah! That's true, isn't it? I think the one time they never did much of note was TRS. Heck, in FE6 they killed the entire Sacae route!

Everyone glows when miracles happen.

So I see the sacred hearts got that right at least.

Sacred what?

We're in a dire strait here, that we're in bargaining phase already.

It's always the bargaining phase with the RNGoddess.

Good job Larentia, it's all at risk now.

I mean, it was over the moment Reese got slept. 0 defense and 0 avoid!

Death continues to be dodged I see.

How would she do against full yandere Faye?

At this point she's had so many brushes with death that I worry for her sanity.

Doom is at 100%

Gah...

Congrats on the insomnia diagnosis.

Thanks.

ACCEPT THAT WE FAILED, BERWICK'S DUCKED

IT'S ONLY DUCKED WHEN I SAY IT'S DUCKED!

...please ignore the thread title. I have said nothing. Nothing!

This is a real groundhog day in Berwick.

Imagine if Ward joined Christine now, all to disapprove of Elbert.

Pffft... You think he'd still refuse to acknowledge her even in the afterlife?

Might as well I guess.

Of course.

Imagine him dancing around the arrows firing at him.

Best generic, definitely. Well, other than spy guy.

I think you'll like this one.

You're right, I do like this one. It has Senator Nanomachines in it!

Well that's Berwick saved.

Hurray... urk.

See?

Bah...

So that's a shame, RIP randomer's arc.

On the other hand, this and another map are easier, so...

That seems like it's be better for another map.

Enemies aren't good enough to use this effectively, unfortunately.

Or Kaga Saga heroes.

Pffft. I'd like to see that. Kaga's take on the gacha genre. He'd somehow make it into not an awful thing that I hate!

I guess that worked out.

So close to doomed.

Even I can't have that much bad luck in a row.

Never try to assume Kaga doesn't hate your levels.

Never did. Have you seen Berwick growths? I think everyone has 20s in everything!

Grauve is an absolute unit.

Too much of an absolute unit.

Also he pulls a Hubert if Esteban lives, what the actual fuck game?

Yes, he does. However, because the game doesn't do it ten thousand times, and because he gives such a badass line when he returns, it's actually satisfying when it happens.

The skillset and shield combined should be illegal.

It really should be...

RIP man in sun void.

Oh, if only you knew...

Also that is some paranoia.

I am always paranoid. Horsemen could be hiding under every nook and cranny!

Kaga hates your levels.

Kaga is funny like that.

Axel, don't kill yourself, I didn't say you were irredeemable.

Well I know you did it, but drama.

Ergh... Well, more on that later. And earlier, too, considering the update title.

So much fucking yolo here.

Too much. Too much. I didn't even know the danger I was in...

Make him a charred, blackened corpse?

Like I did with Seamus in TRS? That's not a bad idea... but I wanted to try something new.

I guess.

Hey-- Don't "guess", we made it out! In worse shape than before, but we're outta there, at least.

GET THAT MONEY MONEY MONEY

I T ' S   A   D !

Okay, that is.

I am glad you agree.

This generic absolutely should be recruitable.

Call him Telemachus.

Pffft... Telemachus... ahahahahahahahahah! Imagine killing Almachus with Telemachus. If Almachus is a boss at all, of course. I won't say.

This was way better than I expected.

Thank Aethin for that.

Of course.

Thanks Kaga, I hate it.

Not gonna lie-- so do I. The only footage I've seen of promoted Adel featured him with 30 spear points exactly... in the final mission of the game. It is not reassuring, let me tell you that much.

No wonder the update took so long.

The pain was enough of a delay.

Not helping was the fact that it was so long. Seriously, I think that was the longest update so far. Goodness...

Time is an illusion, and so is the desolation of your resources.

Wait, that's not true at all.

...Why did you have to remind me...

Good news, my laptop is fixed. It should come back soon. I will have it back soon.

I will pray for your laptop. Or, well, I would if I ever prayed. As it is, the most I know are like 4 verses of Our Father. But the intention is what counts, y'know?

In covid news, we might have had the first cabinet having to self-isolate because our minister for health had symptoms. Then it got undone in hours when he was cleared as negative. With the potential trainwreck and Brexit I think the ride is about to start going fast, oh joy.

Hoo, boy... Good luck, everyone.

 

17 hours ago, Spara said:

Hello, everybody!

Eyy, new reader! Please, do come in, get confortable! We have imaginary cookies!

I've been following along with this LP for a while, finally decided to create an account on here. It's been a fun ride reading the updates and seeing whom fate takes to the grave and who cheats death by pure luck. I'll probably start responding to posts and whatnot once I get myself situated here.

I can only hope that you have at least a little bit of fun.

Plus, I love this game. 4 playthroughs deep, may try an ironman myself when I'm not busy with school. I did a couple casual playthroughs to start, then a pseudo-ranked (35/35/30/33), then a PMU. 

Wow, that's more runs than I've done! Yeah, this game is an absolute joy.

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Also, won't Leon's death stop Adel's character arc from completing? Pretty sure he's important to the next scene in the arc.

I was worried about that myself, but as it turns out, the scene still plays, only with Leon's part at the end removed.

Also, it's kinda oddly well-timed that this update has some stuff referring to Greek myth and Harold/Arthur, when I myself learned of the Harold-Arthur namechange in the Fates translation AND finished reading The Odyssey today. 

Hah! That's rather crazy.

Good luck on 9-2 and 10-m, Ruben.

Thanks. I'm gonna need it, probably. Though, to be honest, I'm more afraid of 11-2, 12-2 and 13...

Looking forward to the next updates!

I'm glad you are! Here, have one.

 

16 hours ago, Benice said:

Hey, hey, hey! Welcome to the forest, we're glad to have you here! Hope you'll enjoy your stay.

Another has joined the Berwick cause! Yeaaah! Let's make Esteban and Owen win the best FE character competition! (I mean, unless you prefer other people. Then vote for them instead.)

Heck yeah, let's go! I mean, we all know that a Three Houses character is going to win, but just the fact that there's KagaSaga characters in the list is enough for me, really.

And, uh, addendum, I guess.

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Not gonna lie, chapters 4 and 5 of Three Houses were SUPER easy. Hoping it gets tougher again, 'cause fighter Lysithea is still viable...

Hoping it gets tougher again

Hahahahahahahahahahah...

Why do you think I ended up hating the game?

Anyways, trying to take down the Death knight with no Dark Spikes will be tough. Hopin' to let Fighter!Lysithea get the final blow!

From my experience, on hard difficulty DK is the only challenge the game has to offer outside of the dickmoves that it occassionally pulls to make you waste divine pulse uses. So yeah. Have fun with that.

Also, fighter Lysithea at base level can deal three damage to the death knight with no rallies or bonuses. Fun fact!

What an absolute unit, this character that I do not like. Seriously, I know she has good reasons to be angsty, but mercilessly bullying Ignatz for the crime of being a good person made me want to throw her at the Death Knight without dark spikes, not gonna lie.

 

 

8 hours ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

 

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Hell, even the ones that don't suck every time tend to suck in at least one incarnation. Enemy layout/objectives is a part of map design... and they will botch it in at least one version... more if you count the optional "free day/exp maps" that exist for grinding.

Jikes...

I'm worse. I did seven (though there was a break between the first two and the latter five) for all the supports. Not counting Byleth's S supports because...  well, no one in their right mind is playing through a game that many times for Byleth's S supports. The sad part is, right after I'm finished... Jeritza announced. Then I just say "fuck it" and watch his supports on youtube. Regrets? Eh. By the end of it I came up with ways to get old Gilbert or Dedue or Raphael to physical invulnerability (if not magical). So no. I was laughing too hard.

Well hey, if you had fun, that's what matters.

Plot twist. Elaine is the first of the Magypsies, and the entire putting a dragon to sleep with pins thing was in fact revenge on her parent's parenting.

Oh wow...

Too far-fetched? I mean I don't think any of the Magypsies ever resembled Elaine... but...

I mean, the only Magypsie that even so much as shares her hair color is Locria, and... well... I'd... much rather not draw that parallel.

Either Joker making Smash Bros or Tokyo Mirage Sessions depending which you're asking about. You know, the FE x SMT crossover... that ended up something rather different again.

Ohhh, right. Huh. Funny how you can draw a direct connection from Smash Bros to softcore ryona porn if you just dig deep enough. Or, y'know, if Youtube decides it really wants you to see it.

This looks like a job for Footballman. His prayers can surely bring the hand of the Goddess to protec

Uh-oh, broken image! Broken image alert!

I mean, that helm is distinct. Shame they stopped wearing the capes from Wind Waker, or the resemblance would be stronger yet.

The image is broken! I cannot see...!

Though when you think about it, Camus' life worked a lot better for him after he died and became Zeke. Funny how he got rewarded for his stubborness, but Nyna got punished in his stead.

True enough... Which, honestly, is so unfair to Nyna. Girl did absolutely nothing, and then literally everything that could go wrong with her life does. Doesn't even get a happy ending or anything, her life is garbage from start to finish.

I mean, Simon Belmont had issues with books too. Just look at the Long Library level in Super Castlevania IV. Or maybe not, because it's an exceptionally easy level for one so late in the game. That said, Drac's a hell of a hoarder. That library level is clearly bigger than my entire house. How many books does this guy have? Then again, is it hoarding if you have the room for it and an eternal life to use it all in? Not to mention hordes of minions and apparently a librarian and library card system for the castle's residents to use (as established in Symphony of the Night)?

Castlevania seems to have a habit of making inanimate objects into fearsome enemies. There is also a certain boss that employs weaponized books...

  Reveal hidden contents

It's also rather multi-layered. See, way back in 1967, Stan Lee and Gene Colan introduced a character quite unlike anything that came before to the Marvel universe. A fellow called Captain Marvel, and alien with Super Strength, flight, leaping abilities, beams (albeit from a weapon). In Marvel Super Heroes 12, aliens of the race known as the Kree came to Earth... with a mission. Their goal was to set the planet up for invasion. The infiltrator would be this captain from the fleet... a Captain Mar-Vell. He was accidentally exposed early in his mission due to the fact his superior officer, Yon-Rogg, had a thing for the good Captain's Fiancee, and "accidentally" activated the Kree's Sentry Robot to destroy the base Mar-Vell's human guise of Walter Lawson was working at/sabotaging. The intent being to remove the captain from his competition. When Mar-Vell stopped the robot in self-interest, he was mistaken for a Super Hero by the public, who heard his name as Captain Marvel. Basically, the series continued in this manner. Mar-Vell trying to sabotage Earth but running into foes that helped maintain the image he was a hero in his other identity. Villains like Super Skrull who was from the Skrull empire, long-time enemies of the Kree, and naturally ready to fight him even if they had the same plan in mind, heroes like the Sub-mariner who had a bad reputation (well deserved, Subby's kind of a dick when it comes to anything not relating to his native Atlantis, but he actually was stopping Mar-Vell's sabotage and got blamed by the media here), and so on. The catch is, this story could only go on so long. Eventually, after about 13 issues worth of increasingly half-hearted sabotage attempts (as he began to grow to like Earth), Yon-Rogg fucked up an attempt to kill Mar-Vell, and killed his fiancee instead. That was it. Mar-Vell would rebel against the Kree Empire like nothing before, and the man once known as it's greatest hero, would become branded it's greatest traitor. Yon-Rogg would die, and Mar-Vell would become the hero he'd been mistaken for. He'd save the universe from the infamous Thanos on no less than three occasions. Which might lead you to wonder, why a hero of such note is forgotten in this day and age. Answer is easy. He died. Published in February of 1982, was the first Marvel Graphic Novel: The Death of Captain Marvel. This was no joke or false advertising. It was no "possible future" tale. Captain Marvel discovered that he had cancer... and he was terminal. He struggled for months across the graphic novel with the knowledge he was going to die in bed, instead of a warrior's death in battle. And so it were, he fell. Unlike numerous other characters in comics, he never came back, Sure, at least five other people would claim the name (one of them going so far as to claim the movie despite being the third shortest serving of the lot). Hell one of these five even thought they were him resurrected due to false memories. But that's all they were. Captain Marvel started his career as naught but a cog in the wheels of intergalactic conquest, a subversion of the hero beyond the stars piece so popularized by Superman. But he died every bit what he originally was created to subvert. And when he died, he took some of the magic with him, because no series using his name on someone else has lasted the thirteen years his did. Unless you count that guy who says Shazam over at the competition... who had the name first.

Surprise exposition dump!

...Honestly though, I'm glad I read through all that, because it's so cool. Accidental hero pulls an Arran. I love it.

Just going to politely point out September is the 9 in 9/11.

...Goddamnit, I can't even blame the 'murican system here. That was entirely my brain fart.

... and we're definitely in September. You posted on 9/10, or September 10th. (I'm acutely aware of the date because a friend has a dog with the day after as a birthday of all things). Point is... just in time for jokes on the next day.
As for why September is the ninth month, October the Tenth, November the 11th, and December the 12 despite the start of each implicating they're two months earlier than they are... you can blame the insertion of July and August into the Calendar in the reign of Augustus Caesar to honor himself and the deceased Julius. By shoving them in the middle of the Calendar, the names for the last four months have become lies by virtue of no-longer applicable pre-fixes. Why the hell they didn't just put them at the end of the year is beyond me. I'm also pretty sure that this is why February is slightly shorter than other months. Because even though the added months, they kept the length of the year. Meaning other months had to be culled. And Augustus was not having a shorter month than Julius. Hence both new months needed as many days.
Now while it's easy to divide 365 days by ten months (36 days for five, 37 for the other five), doing it for 12 is havoc. Long story short, egotistical Roman emporer makes the calendar more complex than it needs to be, and undoing it now would take even more effort.

I never knew that. Huh. You never go to bed without learning something new. Especially when you have The Roger replying to your thread.

Funny that. Ever play Final Fantasy IX? Because in that one it's entirely possible to beat the whole game at level 1 if you use the right abilities/equipment to take advantage of enemy's preferred elemental options and just ruin their day.

Oh wow. That's cool, actually.

I hate panthers. They're frigging assholes in my experience.

......

You know, I'm glad you used "frigging" here. Had you employed the F-word, it would've hit... uh, far too close to the topic at hand.

And by "too close", I mean you would've been right on the money. Yeah. Needless to say, I so regretted clicking on that video. That game was deranged.

Breath of the Wild barely has any story stuff to begin with... and most of it's optional. This game, if you're good enough you can go from the tutorial area straight to Ganon. I mean, you most likely won't win before your weapons break. But that said there's like four dungeons and they're all barely there. This one's all about the optional shit.
I mean, Majora's Mask kind of had most of it's content in optional sidequests too, but the dungeons were definitely a lot bigger there. Point is, Breath of thw Wild has a focus on doing what you want over filling out the story. Beating the dungeons this time amounts to making that last boss easier and getting some abilities.

That's an interesting approach... But knowing me, I'd never get to Ganon. My Guy from Oblivion became the new Prince of Madness and then spent his days drowning in booze at his home in Skingrad, Henry of Skalitz settled down and spent the rest of his life serving as bailiff of Pribyslavitz, and my character from the one time I played Skyrim just remained a student of the university of magic. No doubt Link would end up just letting the world be taken over while he stands around at some town somewhere.

I think if you have multiple accounts on your Switch/Wii U you get a slot if you use them. Not sure.

That's what I meant, though. You need to do some sort of workaround because the devs didn't feel like letting you have multiple save files. It was understandable back in the day, when capacity was much more limited, but nowadays? There is no reason to limit the player's ability to save.

Being an OG Sinon knight isn't good for one's health is it?

I've been too sick to edit it, but I wanted to do this pun anyway because I was waiting since last update.

Yeah, it's fine. I mean, it works well enough, once you know that his actual name is... Well, Marvell.

Looks like you were in Grauve danger.

Pfhah!

Well... that went about as well as my health. Every time I start to come good, I end up back at square one and it's killing me. I mean not literally... but some of the changes to basic procedure due to loss of balance from inner ear disruption is ridiculous.

Sheesh... I hope you can leave this vicious cycle soon enough. Sounds too rough...

 

 

But he's still the best:

Spoiler

Last time... well, what Roswick said. It really was as well done as always. Which is to say, not.

Thank you, Your Grace. We were also able to rescue 60 engineers from enemy clutches.

Wha-- 60!? Did you sneak away to Alex's before the battle? Or did it also say 6D in the report?

All things considered, everything seems to have gone splendidly. The Imperial Army will have no choice but to halt its invasion until they can repair the bridge.

How long do you believe it will take them to repair it?

For the Empire? Hm... I imagine they will have it rebuilt within a month's time.

Just one month...

What? Has Volcens imprisoned Bernstol, too?

...Yes? What of it, Your Grace?

Have you heard no news about it?

I have not. Has the situation changed?

Yes, it has...

......

...Duke Roswick...?

...Lord Reese, I fear I have some dreadful news I must tell you.

Oh, no... the music has stopped, too... No... Don't tell me--!

What!? NO! NOT THE BERNSTOOL!!!

Why does anyone read my stuff, again?

...N-No... That can't be...

Can it be? Will we finally get to watch emotional Reese? So far, the only time he ever came close to it was the time he claimed he'd love to have dinner with the abbey priestesses... Quick, Roswick, whip up something to eat! We must exploit this moment of weakness! It's our only chance to see him cry!

I have yet to hear the full details, but I was told that he fell in battle attempting to recapture Berion. Although he and the soldiers of the Western Front fought bravely, they were utterly wiped out.

......

I am sorry... I know it would be only natural for you to return to Sinon to reclaim your father's honor, but... I know that His Majesty would never allow it...

I thank you for your sympathy... But I...

Have you no sense at all, Vanmilion?! Lord Reese and I are talking! Get out this instant!

Y-Yes... My apologies, Father...

...Actually, Your Grace... I think I should like to be alone for a while... Excuse me...

Well, so far, he appears to be the least sad newly-orphaned child (don't forget, he's a minor) in the history of mankind. But at least he seems just a bit sad. It's something.

Father...?

I never would have imagined that this would happen...

Really? I'm more surprised it didn't happen earlier. He lasted longer than all the FE dads not named Eliwood! Heck, he sent all those Dad Funds alongside Lynette's letters, and the Gram, and the two free Sinon Stallions... Those gestures alone make him a more involved dad than Jer--

Wait, now that I've mentioned her... Oh fuck, if the Western Front's fallen, then... Shit, Lynette!

 

The graveyard's looking awfully empty today. Maybe Reese was just so sad that he couldn't bear the sight of tombstones, so he had them all removed before coming here to brood?

 

Ward...

Duke Roswick told me the news... Lord Reese, if your desire is to return to Sinon, the other knights and I would happily accompany you.

I worry for the people of Sinon... And for Lynette's sake most of all...

You have fulfilled your duties here with loyalty and diligence. If you wish to return home, there would be no shame in doing so.

...No, I can't do that. I gave Father my word. I won't go back on my promise.

Your promise, milord...?

Before I left Sinon, I made a vow to my Father...

Triumphant, but rather bittersweet-sounding. I think it fits, myself.

...Oh, god fucking damnit, Bernstool! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

...Oh, god fucking damnit, me! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

Yes, Father...

You are to go to His Majesty and serve him on my behalf. You will obey his orders and serve him loyally no matter what should occur, even unto the bitter end. If you act selfishly in your own interests, you will forever stain the name of the House of Sinon.

I understand, Father...

Oh yeah, because fuck Lynette, right? I'm sure she'd appreciate receiving word of her beloved onii-chan's death soon after your own. I'm also sure the people of Sinon will be glad to hear that, with their leader gone, his heir will give them all the middle finger and stay in Navaron while they're overrun by Raze.

You must fulfill your duties until the very end. If you cannot do this, then I cannot trust you to go in my stead.

...Will you give me your word, Reese? Will you vow to remain loyal to His Majesty, no matter what happens?

Yes, I give you my word, Father! I will never do anything to bring dishonor upon you!

Very well! Then there is nothing more that needs to be said. The time for parting has come.

Yes, no "I love you, son"s, no "please come back to us alive"s... nah. Fuck all that. What matters is that Volcens is satisfied. Urgh... These are you last words "as his father"? We've had quest-giving strangers more warm than that!

Thank you, Father! And you as well...

Goodness, I think we now know where Reese got his utter lack of humanity... Ol' 'Stool wasn't much better, was he...

...But ever since I made that promise, my choice was already made.

Milord...

Ward. Tell no one about Father's death.

And to top it all off, Reese won't tell the soldiers from Sinon (all... two of them that are still alive) that their liege is dead. They don't have a right to know, I guess. Of course, if we told them, they might want to return, and a soldier back home is a soldier that won't kill themselves fighting for us, eh Reese?

Yes, Lord Reese... As you wish...

...What?

This is going to be depressing, isn't it...

Ahh, fiddlesticks...

...And yet I know it is true.

When Duke Bernard was here, the fight had gone well, and the Duchy of Serenia was reclaimed from the traitor Count Piers... But after the Duke was exiled, Father stood alone against the Imperial Army.

Every day, the people around him schemed and lied, and more of them turned their backs on the kingdom. Father tried to hide it, but it tortured him on the inside, while the war exhausted him of all that he had left. And yet there was nothing I could do to comfort him, not even at the end...

The Western Front has fallen. Even as I now write, the Empire is marching through Serenia on their way here to Sinon.

Those who remain of the castle guard are preparing for the final battle. Now that Father is gone, the duty falls upon me to protect our people.

Thank goodness you're there, too. If it were up to Bernstool and Reese, they could all burn for all they care. Our duty to His Very Important Majesty is the only thing that matters.

I'm afraid this will be my last letter to you.

As promised, I have made you a circlet from the Tulsa yarn that Duke Bernard bought for me. Just as Father said, it may not be quite your style... But please don't laugh. I worked hard on it.

 

Well, fuck. Lynette's most likely dead, too...

Reese didn't even react to the letter. For fuck's sake, Reese, I swear...

Anyway, the circlet. It negates critical hits. I'm assuming it works when it's in Reese's inventory, because our favorite cold-blooded psychopath won't equip it. He doesn't even have the decency to try on his most-likely-deceased sister's final gift... Jesus fucking Christ, Reese...

 

 

 

For the last time, Lord Reese, I will not take that.

Why? Is it because of our current debts? Must I withdraw something before you'll accept this?

No, you don't-- That's not it! A thing like this could only be a keepsake. I don't deal in keepsakes. All the money in the world wouldn't be enough compensation for the person that such items are important to--

It's just a circlet. My sister made it for me, and now I am turning it into funds to spend on supplying my army. What am I doing wrong, exactly?

Your sister? My sister never did such a thing for me... What would she think if she knew you're trying to pawn off her gifts?! Please, Lord Reese, think this through!

She is dead. She cannot think any longer.

...!

Now take the circlet.

No. Find someone else. I will have nothing to do with this--

Heeyyy, Lord Reese! Funny to see you here! What's this about a circlet I'm hearing?

Well, you see--

No! Stop, Reese! That thing negates critical hits! You cannot get rid of it, it'll be useful against assassins!

...What...?

...Of course, he has to ruin everything... Just as always... Damned tactician...!

...I hate my job... I really do...

 

 

 

Okay, now that all that depressing stuff is out of the way, it's time for other things. First off, I want to confirm once and for all that we do not have 100k money. It was a D, goddamnit! A dee!

Let's send Ozama back to Raze for moneys.

Nice moneys, too. 2000! Not too bad, not at all!

Erzheimer, too, has moneys to give to us.

Slowly but surely, we're completing the collection.

And now, it's time to go deliver a message!

Thanks for your hard work. I'll get to decoding it straightaway. It should give us valuable information for the difficult battles ahead of us. With any luck, we might be able to gain the upper hand in this war.

I pray you are right. We need all the help we can get if we want to turn things around.

I am most grateful, General.

I look forward to watching you and your Sinon Knights' successes in the future.

I will give it my all, sir.

More cash! Great.

Long-Lost Daddy is gone here because I recorded it first. But it's way longer, so let's do Imperial Spears before it.

Good afternoon, Mr. Danton.

Much like in the shields sidequests, we are given a choice. And much like in the shields sidequest, upon refusing, Danton comes up with an excuse for why he doesn't need spears anymore that he never mentions if you do give him some.

He was stoppin' by to see if we wanted to buy any of the Imperial supplies they'd found for cheap.

That sounds like a fortunate happenstance indeed!

Right? It was completely out of the blue. So now...

...Yes?

Well, I don't know how to put this without comin' right out and sayin' it...

Come now, Danton. There is no shame in it. Man or woman, the most important thing is that--

Those spears Orlando and I asked you to get...

...You do not need them anymore?

Y-Yeah...

Oh.

I'm sorry, Lady Tianna...

Don't worry, that is no problem. It is simply one less thing that Lord Reese will have to worry about.

Well, I still feel kinda bad... But thanks anyway, Lady Tianna.

We do have spears, though, so you may have them.

You brought them here for us? I'm touched, Lady Tianna! Thank you!

You're quite welcome. It was no trouble at all.

Just like the others, they're made from such good raw materials...

I pray you will be able to make great use of them, then.

Sorry for askin' you and Lord Reese to help us with our jobs.

That's quite all right. It is as General Ward said to me. Soldiers entrust their lives to their equipment on the battlefield, so it is only natural that they should want to help the craftsmen who make it.

General Ward said that, did he? I always knew I liked him.

This exchange seems familiar... well, I went back and checked, and it's more or less the same as the one in the shields sidequest from chapter 4, down to Ward saying something positive about the craftsmen offscreen. Intentional? Could be.

Well, here's your money for the spears you brought us.

Thank you very much.

We're good here for now, but I'll let you know if we're ever on the lookout for some other materials.

I will do my best to help you in any way that I can. Thank you for your hard work!

Brighton gave us more.

Long-Lost Daddy time now.

Will this amount be sufficient?

Yes, it certainly will! Thank you so very much! Now I can get to making this into medicine...

Thank goodness you were able to get it in time... Um... Sir Adel... How was Mr. Matthew faring?

He seemed healthy, and he was not hurt in the battle, fortunately... But he was clearly having some troubles in his old age. For one thing, he kept mistaking me for his son... Also, it looked like his granddaughter was taking care of the farm now.

I see... I suppose that must mean that Deckard's still missing...

What's wrong?

Miss Lumiere, who are you talking about?

Mr. Matthew's son, Deckard... He left home many years ago, and he never went back. Do you know someone by that name?

Yeah... It was my dad's name...

Oh, shoot! I mean, just from the sidequest title it was easy to see this one coming.

What...?

And? Tell us more, Mr. Virgil.

...A long time ago, my father used to be a military commander. He retired after years of battle, but his old wounds caught up with him when I was still a boy.

......

When he was on his deathbed, he said to me. "Son, promise me you'll never become a soldier.

And so that's what I did... That's why I'm in this profession...

......

Turns out, the one who wasted his life was Deckard, after all...

...Thank you for your help, Sir Adel. I'll make the medicine as fast as I can, and then I'll bring it to that village in need. Here, this is a tincture used as a base for many potions. I was considering selling it, but then I thought you or one of the other knights might find it pretty useful. And I have to thank you somehow. So please, take it.

Oh, nice! I know exactly what to do with this.

 

Why does everyone spend their nights standing around on this hill?

...Sir Adel?

Huh...?

I'm sorry for disturbing you... I asked Lady Tianna where I might find you, and she told me you would definitely be here...

Oh, I see... Have you heard anything from Virgil about his medicine?

Yes, he said that he safely delivered the medicine in time.

He saved a lot of people's lives... He's an incredible man.

I wonder if the part about Deckard's old wounds killing him stuck with Adel... certainly seems that way. But you can't become an apothecary yet, man. If you do, you'll get even less spears points than you already do! How would I promote you then?

...I guess we've gone off-topic. Do you need me for something?

Well... I want to apologize.

Apologize? What for?

When I sent word to the Sinon knights for Mr. Virgil's request... I didn't know that you would be the one who was sent.

Meanwhile, three updates ago...

Quote

I like how, in spite of their awkwardness due to Leon's shitty advice, Lumiere still called for Adel first and foremost. Guess she hasn't forgotten about the time he took points for her, even if he did follow up with a completely dumb attempt at flirting.

...I'm so sorry, Adel.

And when you came, I was worried that since I had asked it of you, you would refuse...

No, I should be the one apologizing. Back before... I was being stupid. It's no wonder you turned me down.

Sir Adel... There's something I've wanted to ask you for a while now...

Yes?

Have I... made you hate me?

...Huh?

Ahahahahahahah... The music even stops when Lumiere makes her question, for extra dramatic effect.

Um... Back then, it was the second time we'd ever really spoken... I couldn't accept your key...

(This music starts to play here)

I didn't know how I could... But I truly was happy. Just knowing that you had feelings for me, Sir Adel, my heart was nearly bursting from my chest...

Because... For a long time now, since you've been in this city, I've... I've felt the same way about you...

Ohhhhh! Oho! Isn't that convenient? Turns out, Leon was wrong in every way imaginable! All those men courting her, but she only had eyes for... uh, the random soldier dude she'd never talked to before. Personally, I don't get what she could've seen in him when Derrick was right there up for grabs, but it's her loss.

...But after what happened, I couldn't find the words to speak to you... Oh, why am I saying any of this? You must despise me so...

Sorry... I'm feeling a bit light-headed...

Hwahahahahahahahh... The absolute dork really did just back away from her. Dude, be careful. The cliff's right there. You don't want your little romance to end with a wet plunge. Uh... not that kind of wet plunge, anyway.

I'm not used to this kind of thing... What should I say...? Well, maybe now's as good a time as any to try one of those lines again...

No, you imbecile! You didn't even need to say anything for her to fall in love with you! Forget Leon, just be yourself!

Say, Lumiere... Would you like to hold on to my key from now on?

I'm sorry, Sir Adel... Your room key, I can't accept.

But...

But...?

Yes! Yes! Adel has won! Well... No, that's not right. Adel has failed at every turn. It's Lumiere that's done all the work.

Lumiere...!

And then they had hot steamy sex and were happy together until I got Adel murdered in battle.

Incidentally, if Leon was still alive, he'd be revealed to be stalking them from the woods, and would express how proud he is of Adel. Unfortunately, Leon had an accident, so he could not be creepy tonight.

And now, for something completely different: we're going to pay for Burroughs's ballista.

I mean, now that I have 5200D...

Yes, understood.

Music.

He sure didn't waste any time. Five minutes, and he's already showing off...

Looking good there, buddy! The Empire doesn't stand a chance against us now!

Look at how new and shiny it is!

Are we looking at the same ballista? It looks like nobody has dusted that thing off in a hundred years! Which is quite impressive, considering it probably hasn't existed for longer than a year, if that!

Be careful around her, boys! I worked hard to get her! Well, in a manner of speaking. She's mine to use, at least...

Oh hey, you're that new guy! Burroughs, right? The guy Lord Reese scouted out in person?

Yeah. That's me.

Your sources are unreliable. His strength blows, as do the rest of his stats. But who cares? He can use ballistae!

Nice to meet you, Burroughs!

Glad to have you on the team!

Bwahahahahahahahah... Confused Ward is my favorite Ward.

There he is, all prepped and ready! He'll probably come to the next mission. I have to show him off at some point.

Now... no more delays. It's time for the main event.

Hoo, boy... This does not look great.

Yeah, I brought it... I don't want any of it. Just take it and go.

You're a funny guy, Axel... I just don't get how you think. When did you grow a conscience? Was it because of that little girl? Doesn't really matter, I guess. Now that I've got the treasure, I don't care about you anymore. Goodbye, Axel.

Whoa, whoa! Axel!

 

...Doros said the same thing. I don't care about the treasure. But I can't let you live, either.

What's so funny?

Ha ha ha... It's you, Axel! Looking... at your face right now... You know what I see? It's the same look... you had in your eyes... all those years ago...

...!

And you'll end up in the same filthy pit in hell as the rest of us...

...I know. Go on ahead and save a place for me, will you?

 

 

 

This will play throughout the rest of the event.

How dreadful...

Sister, take this treasure and find a treatment for Ciel's eyes. I... I can't see her anymore. I have no right. ...No, even this money is wrong. It's proof that I'm a murderer. Ciel wouldn't want to be healed thanks to this blood money...

But still... Still, I...

 

......

...I'm a thief and a murderer. Like Gibry said, there's already a place waiting for me in hell.

Mr. Axel... Where will you go now? What will you do?

I'll do what I'm good at. I'll keep fighting against the rest of the damned like myself... That's the only good that someone like me can do anymore...

Mr. Axel... I don't believe you're an evil person. Those tears on your eyes are proof of that.

Hah... Sister Luciana, you should've been a poet.

...Take care of her.

...Goddamnit, someone is cutting onions in my living room again...

So yeah. Axel has sacrificed his last chance at redemption to ensure Ciel's bright future, and believing that he's without hope of salvation, he has proceeded to remove himself from her life, even though she was the only purpose he had in life at this point.

Not sure what it is about this character arc that got me good, but... fuck. I got teary eyed all over again in this second viewing... Damn it all, Axel...

 

Oh, by the way, in case you've forgotten - the whole purpose of that sidequest wasn't just to make us feel depressed. By doing this event, Axel permanently joins the army. With the treasure in Luciana's hands, Axel no longer needs to work as a mercenary to get the money for Ciel's treatment.

Frankly, I'd gladly pay his fee for the rest of the game if it got him to walk back to his daughter...

Tell me something, Axel. What's your reason for wanting to join my army all of a sudden?

I got bored of bein' a mercenary. That's all. Thought it might be better to come work directly for you instead. You wouldn't have to pay my fees anymore, either. It's a good deal for you too, right?

Like hell it is! I might get you killed before you can stop being an idiot and go back to your daughter! Leave my team, damn you! Leave...! Reese, you're always giving new recruits a hard time! Go on, do your thing!

True, I don't have any particular reason to refuse your request...

REESE

Sounds like it's settled, then!

Even the laugh is sad. Goddamnit, everything is making me sad right now. Can I get something stupid to nitpick, so I can go back to being my usual dickhead?

...Gaaaaaahhh... Axel has joined...

Time for some more depression. As if we needed more.

Yes, I found him...

Was it him? Was it Harold?

...No, he wasn't. He looked similar, but he was a completely different person.

Worst part is, Arthur probably means that...

Oh, I see... So he's still missing...

No, Mother... Please listen to me.

Arthur...?

It can't be...

I heard it from a firsthand witness. He died in the battle of Randenberg nearly three years ago.

I'd expected it for a long time, but... But Arthur, are you certain...?

I'm afraid so... But I will do all I can to live up to his legacy. Mother, I promise that I will protect you and Mark as a worthy knight.

Arthur...

Oki-dokie! So, Devil in the Valley or The Supply Base.

We will do Supply Base first, because Devil in the Valley terrifies me.

 

So... this fellow. I won't make the obvious joke with this person's name. I will instead make the slightly less obvious joke with this person's name.

Wind speed is nominal... All right, get ready, men! Fire!

 

Eyy, there's Klamp, too!

Of course, General. I've often heard many good things about you.

Okay, I know I said I wouldn't make the obvious joke, but... c'mon. It's like Kaga knew what would happen. This is perfect.

I'm honored, Lord Reese, but to tell the truth, it's all I can do just to keep the front line from falling apart... So, Lord Reese, what did you think of our little exercise just now?

Well...

Please, speak freely. Give me your honest opinion. In what area do you think my army is most lacking?

Quality equipment, perhaps?

Exactly, Lord Reese! That's precisely the case! It's only natural that we've fallen behind the Empire in the development of artillery. The Imperial Army has conscripted entire corps of engineers specifically for designing and testing prototypes... Whereas we are relying on hired workshops and guilds to develop them for us. We can't keep up.

But that gap can be closed by supplementing other areas like high-mobility cavalry, can't it? Wouldn't it be better to focus on outmaneuvering the enemy with what we already have?

Ah, but I mean no offense. We need optimism like yours in these difficult times.

Funniest thing is, unfortunate name aside, this fellow seems to be the nicest Verian general we've seen so far.

True, you can certainly overcome weakness with such skill... The Knights of Sinon are experts in the art of mounted combat. It would be no issue for you. My soldiers, however, are no warriors. They are farmers, cooks, and potters... Young boys scared for their lives. For my soldiers, such a feat is simply not possible.

I see... Then what will you do, General?

...That's why I asked you to meet me in secret like this.

Lately, we've been hearing reports of the Empire importing large shipments of lumber to one of their bases. I worry what machinations may be in the works inside that base... I can only imagine one thing they would want so much wood for.

You believe they're trying to create more weapons for the war?

Yes, and we have good reason to believe so. The materials they've stockpiled would easily be enough to construct at least twenty ballistae. What's more, I don't think the Empire will be waiting much longer before they deploy them. Our scouts have reported large objects covered in dark cloth in the base.

C'mon! That's so rude! The platoon healer isn't fat, he's just a bit chubby!

These objects were later wheeled away to Goddess knows where. I presume they're some sort of prototype weaponry...

......

I am well aware that what I am asking of you is difficult.

Not as difficult as the other sidequest! That one has assassins! Assassins!

...But I believe your Sinon Knights are the only ones who can successfully pull off this mission. Lord Reese... If the enemy manages to complete their new weapons... the entire Eastern Front may collapse, just as the West has. Please, Lord Reese...

...I understand.

Thank you, Lord Reese... I'm counting on you.

Let's do some preps. First, Rossweisse is repaired with Lendel's repairstone. At the end of the day, I think I'd rather have this mastodon of a bow at full health than the good shield.

Next, let's pay Leon a visit. Hey, his grave isn't shitty like Clifford's!

 

 

Things are back.

A few people gear up. Sherlock only needs one more level to use the apollyon, so he picks one up from Sylvis. I'm still hoping I can give him a promotion, even if it's a rather late one.

Perceval, come here. It's missing time.

Hey, Reiss!

Yes?

Here's an axe.

An axe?! Axes! Yes, give me!

There you go!

Thank you so much for this axe! Do you see that, Pejj?! An axe!

An axe, yes. Pretty bad axe, too.

But still... Axes!

...Sigh...

Now... We only have one miracle charm left, and as much as it pains me, it's not going to Axel. Owen is far more important to the team than either Enid or Axel. I cannot let him die so easily.

Round of vulneraries for everyone, and...

This thing I forgot to do earlier. With Virgil's soma, we'll craft the liquid strength.

It is going to Faye. Why? Well, stats being as relatively unimportant as they are in this game, nobody really needs this too desperately. Faye is not only a safe option (since Faramir ensures she cannot die), she also has one very specific purpose for strength later on in the game. And also, buff myrmidon jokes. So yeah. Benice's waifu it is.

I'm not sure if that's a mistranslation. Our mission isn't to steal, it's to destroy. But well, no matter. Next time, we meet the second-biggest meme among the japanese Berwick fanbase, right behind Derrick. That meme did not survive the transition to english, but it'll still be a bit funny due to unrelated circumstances that I'll be sure to point out. In any case, look forward to that and, hopefully, to no deaths in the Supply Base! See you all. No farewells this time. Gotta change things up from time to time. As they say, variety is the spice of life! So, see ya~!

 

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban
                        Czene
                        Clifford
                        Elbert
                        Leon

                        Faye x 3

* Unavailable

Capture count: 2 (Daoud, Elbert)

Cripple count: 1 (Perceval)

Reset count: 6 (Reese: 1, Ward: 3, Abus: 2)

 

Current perfect streak: -219 maps

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

 

[Spara]

Spoiler

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What!? NO! NOT THE BERNSTOOL!!!

Why does anyone read my stuff, again?

 

Aren't stools made to be sat on? Is this some kind of elaborate "FE Dads are born to die" joke?

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Your sources are unreliable. His strength blows, as do the rest of his stats. But who cares? He can use ballistae!

I dunno, man, my last Burroughs managed to get more non-bracketed Strength levels than Faye in 1/3 of the level ups. He got 2 points while she got 1. 

 

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Thanks. I'm gonna need it, probably. Though, to be honest, I'm more afraid of 11-2, 12-2 and 13...

Am I a sadist for thinking The Heretic God is quite possibly the best map in the entire game? I think the only problem with it is just the occasional assassin spawns in the top-left. If Larentia survives, though, I doubt it'll be too bad. 

 

Also, still kinda sad that Christine died before you could recruit Esteban. He's one of my favorite units to use, even though he sucks (same goes for Adel). Plus, the Pastacannon doesn't backfire at 50 bow skill, so using him in Endgame after training him is a hell of a power trip. My last one could ORKO all of Chaos's squad in that map, in part because I was lucky enough to have him constantly skate the tops of his str/spd brackets (he never leveled defense to make up for it). At least Adel's still here to kick some ass. 

Quick little side-rant here: Living in the US during COVID is honestly pretty depressing. We hit yet another spike in cases, and yet people in Florida are going on maskless, no-social-distancing family parades in department stores (sadly, not even exaggerating -  people will literally go in groups of 10-20, cram down store isles, and shout and yell). A lot of colleges and universities (luckily not mine) still moved all their students to campus, even though very few of them are having actual in-person classes, which exposes both the local community and the communities of the students to more cases just so the schools can charge the students room, board, and other stuff. I'm not usually the cynic, but it's pretty hard to watch. At least some of the state governments are somewhat competent, but that does not make up for the circus shows that are Georgia and Florida. 

The worst part is that it feels like so many Americans are totally averse to putting cloth on their faces. I know of plenty of schools that will send children home for tiny dress code violations, but refuse to take action when someone doesn't wear a mask. 

[Pengaius]

Spoiler

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let me guess: that is no longer the case after Wooden Cavalry.

Yup, I just lost Catria at Gra Bastion because what reason would there be for a flier to not self recruit in range of a longbow. But hey at least nobody died on wooden cavalry, ha ha... hah.

 

[ranger016]

Spoiler

  

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why not use someone else to block the pirate reinforcements? Just keep Axel there until someone else can get to the fort, then replace him. I mean, probably too late for advice now, but...

Yeah, was thinking that as well, probably will have to restart the map either way thanks to not having enough vulneraries.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm cursed, I tell you. Cursed! You should know, you've been there from the start. Even if you never said much.

Atleast the sword user curse seems to have left, or maybe Faye have been enough sacrifice for this time...

I like reading and lurking more than writing, your LP are probably the first thread where I continued to comment more than once or twice.

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I mean... Ward is pretty difficult to down at first, but as the game progresses his inability to level up starts to catch up to him. He never becomes outright bad or anything, but he does become a more average unit by the end.

Good to know I am not just really bad to use him properly, not getting exp is definitely a minus for him and the other prepromotes not named Sylvis.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's not like they couldn't program them not to attack - Grauve himself never does, I tested it!

Yeah, it's just Kaga being Kaga..

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Lv 23* don't forget he has Expert. Unless it randomly works differently for Izerna's orb, he should be able to use it soon-ish.

Right, I remember getting to use it with Owen as soon as I got it but didn't remember how.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wha-- another one!? I didn't think that D was so difficult to tell apart from the zeros!

Anyway, yeah. That's a D. It's only 10k. Which, hey, still. Plenty of money, since this chapter didn't give Dad Funds.

I have no idea what you are talking about. Ofcourse I knew it was 10000D

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't imagine Volcens will be too pleased, given his love for arbitrary time limits.

I don't think he even remembers sending the Sinon knights in such a mission.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wha-- 60!? Did you sneak away to Alex's before the battle? Or did it also say 6D in the report?

He did need an excuse for why this mission took so long.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why does anyone read my stuff, again?

RIP best dad stool, you were great.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, so far, he appears to be the least sad newly-orphaned child (don't forget, he's a minor) in the history of mankind. But at least he seems just a bit sad. It's something.

I think Holmes could compete with him for that position though, too bad Vals didn't die.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, no "I love you, son"s, no "please come back to us alive"s... nah. Fuck all that. What matters is that Volcens is satisfied. Urgh... These are you last words "as his father"? We've had quest-giving strangers more warm than that!

Well, knowing Volcens, this was probably the correct decision. He probably would have Reese imprisoned as a traitor if he tried to go back to Sinon.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Reese didn't even react to the letter. For fuck's sake, Reese, I swear...

I was surprised by the lack of response after this letter as well, would it really hurt to have even a simple "..." after this?

Spoiler

 

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

For the last time, Lord Reese, I will not take that.

Why? Is it because of our current debts? Must I withdraw something before you'll accept this?

No, you don't-- That's not it! A thing like this could only be a keepsake. I don't deal in keepsakes. All the money in the world wouldn't be enough compensation for the person that such items are important to--

It's just a circlet. My sister made it for me, and now I am turning it into funds to spend on supplying my army. What am I doing wrong, exactly?

Your sister? My sister never did such a thing for me... What would she think if she knew you're trying to pawn off her gifts?! Please, Lord Reese, think this through!

She is dead. She cannot think any longer.

...!

Now take the circlet.

No. Find someone else. I will have nothing to do with this--

Knowing Reese, I wouldn't even be surprised if you told this actually was in the game.

 

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

There he is, all prepped and ready! He'll probably come to the next mission. I have to show him off at some point.

Character aside, he is a great unit for defeating annoying opponents like ballistae, crossbowmen and softening up knights.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So yeah. Axel has sacrificed his last chance at redemption to ensure Ciel's bright future, and believing that he's without hope of salvation, he has proceeded to remove himself from her life, even though she was the only purpose he had in life at this point.

Not sure what it is about this character arc that got me good, but... fuck. I got teary eyed all over again in this second viewing... Damn it all, Axel...

That was pretty depressing, Axel's character arc is one of my favorites along with Arthur's, hope you can keep both alive by the end...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Worst part is, Arthur probably means that...

Well, telling her the truth would probably hurt their relationship even more, not to mention Harold would probably seen as a traitor if his condition became known.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, but I mean no offense. We need optimism like yours in these difficult times.

Wise words...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

In any case, look forward to that and, hopefully, to no deaths in the Supply Base! See you all. No farewells this time. Gotta change things up from time to time. As they say, variety is the spice of life! So, see ya~!

Flags everywhere, Ah, but I mean no offense. We need optimism like yours in these difficult times.

 

[BrightBow]

 

Spoiler

 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That is true. I wonder who leaked the info... Hmmm... Could it be...

 

Virgil!?

Nah. It has to be Ward. We know he is working for the Empire, after all.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahahah... The fact that you used comic sans just kills me.

Good to hear. I spent way to much time coming up with a good way to express that "Trump altering a hurricane map with a sharpie" look.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I have yet to hear the full details, but I was told that he fell in battle attempting to recapture Berion. Although he and the soldiers of the Western Front fought bravely, they were utterly wiped out.

 Initially things were looking up. But after Zephyrus lead a charge against their mothership and destroyed it, the Pyronians panicked and retreated to their home planet, turning the battle in the Empire's favor.

 I suppose in the future I will know better then to doubt your judgement, General.

  Nonsense. I am glad I can at least count on you to question my decisions. These days honest minds are hard to come by in the Imperial army, thanks to Faisal bringing in all those bootlickers.

 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, no "I love you, son"s, no "please come back to us alive"s... nah. Fuck all that. What matters is that Volcens is satisfied. Urgh... These are you last words "as his father"? We've had quest-giving strangers more warm than that!

Such a pointless flashback. It didn't add anything that couldn't also have been expressed by Reese simply saying "Father told me to stay loyal to Volcens no matter what happens to Sinon." The only scene he shares with Reese and it's completely wasted.
Fortunately he is better developed in Lynette's letters, at least.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ward. Tell no one about Father's death.

Why? And how?
Not sure how the state of the entire Western front can be kept from the others.

This cliff scene is so strange.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is going to be depressing, isn't it...

Guess Lynette has to pick up the slack and salvage this mess. The cliff scene I mean, not the Western front. I mean, the Western front too. But that's not what I meant in that case.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Those who remain of the castle guard are preparing for the final battle. Now that Father is gone, the duty falls upon me to protect our people.

Yo Reese, how are you feeling about your decision to deny Lynette's request to join the knights of Sinon?
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

As promised, I have made you a circlet from the Tulsa yarn that Duke Bernard bought for me. Just as Father said, it may not be quite your style... But please don't laugh. I worked hard on it.

Funnily enough one of the many unused designs of Reese actually wears a circlet like that. Although that one is not even that different from final Reese. It's just the collar and eye color. ...kinda makes me wish he would actually be shown wearing it from her on now, come to think of it. Maybe it could even be his promotion trigger.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Must have been nice for her to not be an orphan for a year or so. Too bad.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Anyway, the circlet. It negates critical hits. I'm assuming it works when it's in Reese's inventory, because our favorite cold-blooded psychopath won't equip it. He doesn't even have the decency to try on his most-likely-deceased sister's final gift... Jesus fucking Christ, Reese...

Not his fault his class doesn't allow to equip accessories.

And yeah, it works by being in his inventory. You can see in battle forecasts that enemy crit chances are reduced to 0 now.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, now that all that depressing stuff is out of the way, it's time for other things.

What are you talking about? The world's crappiest father's day ain't over yet.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I still feel kinda bad... But thanks anyway, Lady Tianna.

So are you guys still going to sell those Prototype Spears next chapter or...?
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Doros said the same thing. I don't care about the treasure. But I can't let you live, either.

 You can call me Axel. I'm currently 33 years old. Not that you'd care, but I reside in northeast Navaron's industrial district. Also, I've yet to marry. In order to make a living, I work as a mercenary. After a long day's work, I return home no later than 8 PM. I don't like smoking, but do enjoy the occasional drink. I'm always in bed by 11 PM, and I make it a point to get no less than 8 hours of sleep each night. Before bed, I drink a warm glass of milk, it's always coupled with 20 minutes of stretching to decompress from the long work day. Sweet dreams are the usual result of this. I then awake as refreshed and recharged as a newborn child, ready to take on the day's challenges, and after my last checkup I was given a clean bill of health.

Hey, what's the big idea creeper? Why are you telling me all this crap?

 For as long as I can remember I've done everything in my power to live a productive life that allows me to pursue a lasting inner peace. This may be a foreign concept, but I choose not to concern my self with winning or losing, life's troubles, or enemies who bring sleepless nights. That is how I cope with this backwards life we find ourselves living. It's what brings me happiness in a world fraught with hardship and misery. Of course, if I were ever to engage in combat, I would win the battle without question.

...

  In other words, Gibry: You are an irksome troublemaker who stands to hinder my sleep. You, old friend, are the enemy.

  But before you have the chance to utter a word of this to another soul, I shall eradicate you.

  I'll sleep soundly tonight. I can already feel it.

 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Probably shouldn't have murdered her parents then.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Mr. Axel... I don't believe you're an evil person. Those tears on your eyes are proof of that.

He just murdered a guy in cold blood. Stabbed in the back and all.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I got bored of bein' a mercenary. That's all. Thought it might be better to come work directly for you instead. You wouldn't have to pay my fees anymore, either. It's a good deal for you too, right?

Guess it's better to miss out on money then to miss out on a chance to stimulate that old murder boner.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 Arthur...

 Yes?

 As someone whose father actually did die for real... I don't think you should let your family believe a lie.

 ...
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So... this fellow. I won't make the obvious joke with this person's name. I will instead make the slightly less obvious joke with this person's name.

We just came from the plague too. And now we got this guy, trying to spread his deadly load over great distances to as many people as possible. Great.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

With the destroyed Remagen bridge separating us from the Empire's forces, I don't think we will be sabotaging anything anytime soon.
 

21 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...But I believe your Sinon Knights are the only ones who can successfully pull off this mission. Lord Reese... If the enemy manages to complete their new weapons... the entire Eastern Front may collapse, just as the West has. Please, Lord Reese...

Of course. They would have a R&D installation near Navaron, miles ahead of the frontline. What was a thinking?

 

Edited September 18, 2020 by BrightBow

[Punished Dayni]

Spoiler

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

All jokes aside, I don't think 3H has the worst map design in the series, but out of the games that I've played, it's definitely the most mediocre. That's a good word for it: mediocre. It's not so terrible that it makes me want to fly to Japan and bomb IntSys's headquarters, but the maps are so tiny, so straightforward and there's so little going on most of the time that it's just... a snoozefest from start to finish.

Not helping is the huge mistakes they made with the Kill Commander maps, where half the time the commander is hiding behind a wall 8 tiles away from the team, so you can just warp up to them and end them in one or two turns (looking at you, Cornelia and Hubert...). And since there's unlimited supplies of warp in this game, well... It's perhaps even more warpskippable than Shadow Dragon. Which is sad.

So yeah, that's my honest-to-God, no-joke opinion. They're not horrible, but they're not great, or even good. They're just... serviceable enough, that if the game had no other flaws, I could probably overlook this one. A shame that is not the case.

  I ask myself if that's the case and I'd love to see if someone actually bothered to do a full analysis of the series.

More warpskippable only works when you have a sufficient range and certainly you're right there for sure with some (Off the top of my head). Stride, on the other hand...... that's some broken fun. Both together is of course just a recipe for stupid fast clearing. I also usually prefer to deal with most everything, rather not risk having anything left behind. Warp being reusable I think wasn't a bad idea, because there is an incentive to actually use these as opposed to hoarding them "just in case" and its limited use means you need to have the plan to use it in that example (with Cornelia being an easy case).

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Flashback time!

I was not asking for this.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahh, I understand. Well, good luck with the last few recruits, if you still have any pending.

Eheh, I recruited Dorthea and Annette last.

My real issue is getting around to playing the next two chapters. Because there's a lot of things going on as it stands.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Oh wow... I already knew about that, but I hadn't realized... Hah! Fuckin' IntSys, I swear. What's next? Will the next big bad in FE be called Reese?

Incidentally, this is why I always find it funny when people give fan translators hell for not religiously sticking with IntSys's name translations. For example, the whole Vergil debacle. I mean, sure, IntSys said Belf, but Belf sucks so much... Also, the Safy/Safiya/Safie nonsense with Project Exile. It's true that the translator's reason for changing Safy was kinda iffy, but Safy is a really weird-looking name (looks more like a hypocorism than a real name), and the fact that they also transliterated Carrion speaks volumes of how little they care about properly translating the names for the Heroes ballot list.

Add to all that the fact that IntSys have screwed up proper translations completely many times in the past, and, well... I just don't see why anyone should invariably look to the Heroes CyL list for names. Theirs should not be taken as the Word of God, since they're so prone to making mistakes or going for the easiest transliteration. Especially when translating the Kaga games - since Kaga isn't even a part of IntSys anymore, IntSys's name translations are no more official than the ones the fans can come up with.

The beauty of it is that the localisers almost certainly didn't realise this. If there's some guy in Treehouse who had played both Genealogy and Berwick before Fates was released that would be insanely unlikely.

Are we still giving fan translators guff over the names?

The fact that these lists get changes for a game that has no official localisation beyond that list is a bit of a stretch to say that there's no right to do so (This is not a discussion of the quality of those changes). And I must be honest, but the claim that IS can't have any legitmacy over what is their IP seems to be a bit of an extremist position to take. That being said, you can say that the only person who could claim that legitimacy is Tsujiyoki as the last person who was around from then who still works with IS in any capacity if we take the logical conclusion. That's of course ignoring that when it comes to the localisation of the games that's not even IS necessarily involved any more. Specifically for Heroes I'm not sure what the dynamic is without checking, but I'm confident in thinking that it's not IS directly over it.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So I see the sacred hearts got that right at least.

Sacred what?

Sacred Hearts are an image of Jesus Christ that tend to depict him with a bright red heart that is either reflective of light or essentially emit light.

They were more of a thing among older generations here, but they have the association of being holy and of course I can't help but think of a recent documentary where I saw a building blown up and a Sacred Heart untouched by the bomb.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This has a cursed end.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! That's true, isn't it? I think the one time they never did much of note was TRS. Heck, in FE6 they killed the entire Sacae route!

You forgot Shirou being the worst.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Lord Reese, I fear I have some dreadful news I must tell you.

Oh, no... the music has stopped, too... No... Don't tell me--!

Reese right now:

MY FIGHT MONEY!

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Have you no sense at all, Vanmilion?! Lord Reese and I are talking! Get out this instant!

Y-Yes... My apologies, Father...

...Actually, Your Grace... I think I should like to be alone for a while... Excuse me...

Sheesh, poor Vanmillion, making such an unforced error.

I mean it's apparent for Reese.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The graveyard's looking awfully empty today. Maybe Reese was just so sad that he couldn't bear the sight of tombstones, so he had them all removed before coming here to brood?

SO MANY HILLS FOR PEOPLE TO GO TO.

Is Navaron the City of the Hills or no man?

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Duke Roswick told me the news... Lord Reese, if your desire is to return to Sinon, the other knights and I would happily accompany you.

I worry for the people of Sinon... And for Lynette's sake most of all...

Reese caring that others could be in danger.

Who is this man and what has he done to Reese?

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Oh, god fucking damnit, Bernstool! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

...Oh, god fucking damnit, me! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

Oh, god fucking dammit, me! Would it have killed me to have a good response to this?

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh yeah, because fuck Lynette, right? I'm sure she'd appreciate receiving word of her beloved onii-chan's death soon after your own. I'm also sure the people of Sinon will be glad to hear that, with their leader gone, his heir will give them all the middle finger and stay in Navaron while they're overrun by Raze.

You must fulfill your duties until the very end. If you cannot do this, then I cannot trust you to go in my stead.

Feudal systems for you.

Bernstol was too used to the system.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, no "I love you, son"s, no "please come back to us alive"s... nah. Fuck all that. What matters is that Volcens is satisfied. Urgh... These are you last words "as his father"? We've had quest-giving strangers more warm than that!

See what I mean by Reese thinking about something beyond duty being a sign he's been replaced?

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahh, fiddlesticks...

...And yet I know it is true.

When Duke Bernard was here, the fight had gone well, and the Duchy of Serenia was reclaimed from the traitor Count Piers... But after the Duke was exiled, Father stood alone against the Imperial Army.

Every day, the people around him schemed and lied, and more of them turned their backs on the kingdom. Father tried to hide it, but it tortured him on the inside, while the war exhausted him of all that he had left. And yet there was nothing I could do to comfort him, not even at the end...

The Western Front has fallen. Even as I now write, the Empire is marching through Serenia on their way here to Sinon.

Those who remain of the castle guard are preparing for the final battle. Now that Father is gone, the duty falls upon me to protect our people.

I'm afraid this will be my last letter to you.

As promised, I have made you a circlet from the Tulsa yarn that Duke Bernard bought for me. Just as Father said, it may not be quite your style... But please don't laugh. I worked hard on it.

That's a lot going wrong at once. I guess Berwick is breaking at the seams.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, fuck. Lynette's most likely dead, too...

Reese didn't even react to the letter. For fuck's sake, Reese, I swear...

I think he's officially numbed himself to the pain and killed what little emotion was left.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Miss Lumiere, who are you talking about?

Mr. Matthew's son, Deckard... He left home many years ago, and he never went back. Do you know someone by that name?

Yeah... It was my dad's name...

Oh, shoot! I mean, just from the sidequest title it was easy to see this one coming.

What...?

And? Tell us more, Mr. Virgil.

...A long time ago, my father used to be a military commander. He retired after years of battle, but his old wounds caught up with him when I was still a boy.

......

When he was on his deathbed, he said to me. "Son, promise me you'll never become a soldier.

I mean, Deckard did manage to do something.

It's a shame it broke him as well. And ensured he didn't see his son grow.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Turns out, the one who wasted his life was Deckard, after all...

...Thank you for your help, Sir Adel. I'll make the medicine as fast as I can, and then I'll bring it to that village in need. Here, this is a tincture used as a base for many potions. I was considering selling it, but then I thought you or one of the other knights might find it pretty useful. And I have to thank you somehow. So please, take it.

I don't necessarily think he wasted it, more that he couldn't find himself following his father and lived his life, even with regrets. Deckard might disagree.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And when you came, I was worried that since I had asked it of you, you would refuse...

No, I should be the one apologizing. Back before... I was being stupid. It's no wonder you turned me down.

More misunderstandings ended, hooray I guess.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

(This music starts to play here)

I didn't know how I could... But I truly was happy. Just knowing that you had feelings for me, Sir Adel, my heart was nearly bursting from my chest...

Because... For a long time now, since you've been in this city, I've... I've felt the same way about you...

Ohhhhh! Oho! Isn't that convenient? Turns out, Leon was wrong in every way imaginable! All those men courting her, but she only had eyes for... uh, the random soldier dude she'd never talked to before. Personally, I don't get what she could've seen in him when Derrick was right there up for grabs, but it's her loss.

...But after what happened, I couldn't find the words to speak to you... Oh, why am I saying any of this? You must despise me so...

Derrick probably cares about the past more.

😜

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And then they had hot steamy sex and were happy together until I got Adel murdered in battle.

Incidentally, if Leon was still alive, he'd be revealed to be stalking them from the woods, and would express how proud he is of Adel. Unfortunately, Leon had an accident, so he could not be creepy tonight.

Almost a relief he died right before his arc could happen.

Sarcasm of course.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

...Doros said the same thing. I don't care about the treasure. But I can't let you live, either.

Brutal, man.

This is why you should have found that avoid gem Gibry.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And you'll end up in the same filthy pit in hell as the rest of us...

...I know. Go on ahead and save a place for me, will you?

Well, at least he knows it wasn't right.

Right before ending the man quite thoroughly.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This will play throughout the rest of the event.

How dreadful...

Sister, take this treasure and find a treatment for Ciel's eyes. I... I can't see her anymore. I have no right. ...No, even this money is wrong. It's proof that I'm a murderer. Ciel wouldn't want to be healed thanks to this blood money...

Me right now:

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

......

...I'm a thief and a murderer. Like Gibry said, there's already a place waiting for me in hell.

He's not wrong.

But at least he tried to be better than Gibry, come on!

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So yeah. Axel has sacrificed his last chance at redemption to ensure Ciel's bright future, and believing that he's without hope of salvation, he has proceeded to remove himself from her life, even though she was the only purpose he had in life at this point.

Not sure what it is about this character arc that got me good, but... fuck. I got teary eyed all over again in this second viewing... Damn it all, Axel...

RIP Axel's happiness, why must you have ended it yourself?

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, by the way, in case you've forgotten - the whole purpose of that sidequest wasn't just to make us feel depressed. By doing this event, Axel permanently joins the army. With the treasure in Luciana's hands, Axel no longer needs to work as a mercenary to get the money for Ciel's treatment.

Frankly, I'd gladly pay his fee for the rest of the game if it got him to walk back to his daughter...

True.

Also she wasn't adopted by him.

I kinda want a happy end, but Kaga won't.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Even the laugh is sad. Goddamnit, everything is making me sad right now. Can I get something stupid to nitpick, so I can go back to being my usual dickhead?

That, that's a face hiding the pain, which of course Reese wouldn't realise.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Was it him? Was it Harold?

...No, he wasn't. He looked similar, but he was a completely different person.

Worst part is, Arthur probably means that...

RIP HarOld.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Of course, General. I've often heard many good things about you.

Okay, I know I said I wouldn't make the obvious joke, but... c'mon. It's like Kaga knew what would happen. This is perfect.

Reese truly is the baddies.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, but I mean no offense. We need optimism like yours in these difficult times.

Funniest thing is, unfortunate name aside, this fellow seems to be the nicest Verian general we've seen so far.

True, you can certainly overcome weakness with such skill... The Knights of Sinon are experts in the art of mounted combat. It would be no issue for you. My soldiers, however, are no warriors. They are farmers, cooks, and potters... Young boys scared for their lives. For my soldiers, such a feat is simply not possible.

Certainly the most pragmatic as well.

Why isn't he working with Roswick to change the- Oh right, Volcens.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Not as difficult as the other sidequest! That one has assassins! Assassins!

...But I believe your Sinon Knights are the only ones who can successfully pull off this mission. Lord Reese... If the enemy manages to complete their new weapons... the entire Eastern Front may collapse, just as the West has. Please, Lord Reese...

Wait, isn't that the sea?

So we're going to have a sea map, right?

(Hush about Bornia)

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Kira wins.

Kira also would save if he just killed Urbanus already.

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Thank you so much for this axe! Do you see that, Pejj?! An axe!

An axe, yes. Pretty bad axe, too.

But still... Axes!

AXES

20 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It is going to Faye. Why? Well, stats being as relatively unimportant as they are in this game, nobody really needs this too desperately. Faye is not only a safe option (since Faramir ensures she cannot die), she also has one very specific purpose for strength later on in the game. And also, buff myrmidon jokes. So yeah. Benice's waifu it is.

Buff Myrmidon!

So I assume that's for Chaos.

So for another Aggretsuko, turns out another character is voiced by Edelgard's VA and she's in a superior position to Bernetsuko, which of course got more noticeable when she starts helping her. Once again, thanks 3H.

Off topic, the 3DS is finally dead. Also my laptop returned.

Also on courses, I've got one starting too next week. It's part time though.

[Golb89]

On 9/18/2020 at 1:17 AM, Spara said:

Quick little side-rant here: Living in the US during COVID is honestly pretty depressing. We hit yet another spike in cases, and yet people in Florida are going on maskless, no-social-distancing family parades in department stores (sadly, not even exaggerating -  people will literally go in groups of 10-20, cram down store isles, and shout and yell). A lot of colleges and universities (luckily not mine) still moved all their students to campus, even though very few of them are having actual in-person classes, which exposes both the local community and the communities of the students to more cases just so the schools can charge the students room, board, and other stuff. I'm not usually the cynic, but it's pretty hard to watch. At least some of the state governments are somewhat competent, but that does not make up for the circus shows that are Georgia and Florida. 

The worst part is that it feels like so many Americans are totally averse to putting cloth on their faces. I know of plenty of schools that will send children home for tiny dress code violations, but refuse to take action when someone doesn't wear a mask. 

Show them these comics and they'll all behave:

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fm5ces/covid19_awareness_message/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fqydrv/covid19_awareness_message_part_2/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fma0eo/a_covid19_situation_update_from_rhodes_island/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fumvzx/spread_the_word_not_the_virus/

Maybe.

[Hanes]

Spoiler

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

An announcement. It's not yet 100% certain, but if I am admitted, I will soon begin some new studies. I have to move, too, though not too far from home. I've got a laptop now, so it shouldn't impact the LP in any major way, but given I'll have less time, I might slow down just a tad.

...On the other hand, the start of the year for my course has been postponed. My best guess is that they're having trouble figuring out how to arrange a classroom full of people with computers (not necessarily laptops, either) while mantaining a safe distance. So even if I'm admitted, I haven't the slightest idea when we'll start. I'll keep you informed, if you care at all, but... yeah. Proceeding as normal for the moment.

I see... I've been in school for some time now, I forget if I asked you before, but what are you going to study?

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Did you just do the Valtome laugh?

...I think I'm seriously eager to kill you, now. I shall do just that. In lieu of an specific address, I believe it prudent to bomb Mexico instead.

Ah.... heeheehee... the Valtome laugh? I have no idea what you mean.

Bomb Mexico? Well it's only fair for my threat to bomb Spain...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahaha... ahhh, I'm so sorry...

Nah it was pretty funny... though dark...

I actually usually forget what I'm replying to, but these out-of-context lines confuse me so now I have my previous responses up to see what's up hehehe...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Scratch that- even Volo isn't awful enough for this.

Awful? It's great! Even better all those lines (except the last one) are in the bible, the book of revelations iirc.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, well, I win because I said so. How's that for an argument?

Ok Ben Shapiro.

Legit he be like "Let's say for the sake of argument that scenario that is not practically possible in any way happened, what would you do now huh? Checkmate atheists/liberals/college students".

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

For extra uselessness. No, seriously, what are eyebrows good for?

...Ahh, they keep sweat and other fluids from getting into the eyes. Interesting...

A long time ago I read somewhere that they help protect you from light above, like the sun and what not...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, that just adds to the list. It's not just ryona and vore, it's also microphilia. Three different types of fun in one package! Sure sounds like a neat little series.

What... omg look maybe it sounds bad but it's not. Play it!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You should give it a try, and tell me how it goes. Since you're the big-shot SMT fan and all...

>big-shot

Sure. I know very little lol, I like Nocturne a lot and that's it so war. Also played Devil Survivor 2.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Here, take a look!

I... isn't this the one I was talking about? I didn't know that Claudia was her name but I did read it.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't think there is.

Really? Well iirc there was, but oh well. If I'm not a lazy fat-ass I'll look for it.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Thanks! It wasn't easy to make.

Did you make it? Woah! That's pretty epic man!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Quite. You don't know it until you try it.

Well I have started, in a sense I guess. I started my FE7 LP but on Youtube (and non ironman), here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKSVCfxf7_o&t

 

Yes the voice... it's embarrassing : (

Quote

In fairness, if I hadn't taken out the courier they still would've showed up.

Ah, I thought if the courier died they wouldn't show up, I thought that's why you were so pent up over it.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No comments on the death portrait? Aww... Well, I'm sure among all the readers, at least someone will react to it.

Oh, well let me check it...

ah yeah it was definitely something alright, though I didn't mind it much.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Wait, what?

No, you dummy! The final zero is a D! Y'know, the D from Denarii? It's 10,000D!

Ah! Hehehe... I goofed.... I dun goof'd. Haha... Imagine IF IT WAS 100,000! Ahhhh....

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I shall obey. But just this once!

Th-then the meme is dead? no more inb4 Ruben's? Ha! The chain has been broken even from it's theoretical plausible revival... !

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, how's your day?

It's alright... I'm one day late because I was grounded yesterday... yeah... but today is good.



Hey you missed my standalone post on how I beat Gaiden and updated my colors. Oh well I'll say it again. I beat gaiden and it was fun, well some parts were fun, others weren't. Alm with a bow is epic

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wha-- 60!? Did you sneak away to Alex's before the battle? Or did it also say 6D in the report?

Hahaha! Ah new meme... lol!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

What!? NO! NOT THE BERNSTOOL!!!

Why does anyone read my stuff, again?

...N-No... That can't be...

Huh, I thought maybe Berwick would let him live... damn.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Actually, Your Grace... I think I should like to be alone for a while... Excuse me...

Well, so far, he appears to be the least sad newly-orphaned child (don't forget, he's a minor) in the history of mankind. But at least he seems just a bit sad. It's something.

Oh a minor? I should have expected that I guess. Was Sigurd the only adult lord we had with Kaga? I don't actually know.

Also I'm still waiting to see what happens with Reese, allow me to continue reading...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Oh, god fucking damnit, Bernstool! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

...Oh, god fucking damnit, me! Would it have killed you to phrase that differently?!

pfft... haahaha!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, no "I love you, son"s, no "please come back to us alive"s... nah. Fuck all that. What matters is that Volcens is satisfied. Urgh... These are you last words "as his father"? We've had quest-giving strangers more warm than that!

Thank you, Father! And you as well...

Another peeve of mine, father. Like does anyone irl call their dad father? It's such a weird way to call someone, like you would call them that when mentioning them to someone else, not to your dad himself.

Ok so like I told you before, it makes no sense that these are BernStooool's last words "as a father", what's up with them?

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Thank goodness you're there, too. If it were up to Bernstool and Reese, they could all burn for all they care. Our duty to His Very Important Majesty is the only thing that matters.

And repeating father a million times, and saying the absolute worst last words "as a father"... like B R UH, what was that? Actually this comment on his words should go up... give me one second...

Ok I just wrote it atop the previous quoted thing, now messy timelines for replies are canon in my posts, uwee hee hee, Bwahahaha! kee hee hee! Yar har har! Mwahahaha!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Reese didn't even react to the letter. For fuck's sake, Reese, I swear...

Anyway, the circlet. It negates critical hits. I'm assuming it works when it's in Reese's inventory, because our favorite cold-blooded psychopath won't equip it. He doesn't even have the decency to try on his most-likely-deceased sister's final gift... Jesus fucking Christ, Reese...

I'm sure at this point Kaga wasn't even trying to make him into a psychopath and now we find symbolism and whatnot of it through small details...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

For the last time, Lord Reese, I will not take that.

Why? Is it because of our current debts? Must I withdraw something before you'll accept this?

No, you don't-- That's not it! A thing like this could only be a keepsake. I don't deal in keepsakes. All the money in the world wouldn't be enough compensation for the person that such items are important to--

It's just a circlet. My sister made it for me, and now I am turning it into funds to spend on supplying my army. What am I doing wrong, exactly?

Your sister? My sister never did such a thing for me... What would she think if she knew you're trying to pawn off her gifts?! Please, Lord Reese, think this through!

She is dead. She cannot think any longer.

...!

Now take the circlet.

No. Find someone else. I will have nothing to do with this--

Heeyyy, Lord Reese! Funny to see you here! What's this about a circlet I'm hearing?

Well, you see--

No! Stop, Reese! That thing negates critical hits! You cannot get rid of it, it'll be useful against assassins!

...What...?

...Of course, he has to ruin everything... Just as always... Damned tactician...!

...I hate my job... I really do...

Hehehe, this was a good side-plot. Also I love how Conman's file isn't even capitalized, it's as motivated as he is that it doesn't even have proper capitalization.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

General Ward said that, did he? I always knew I liked him.

This exchange seems familiar... well, I went back and checked, and it's more or less the same as the one in the shields sidequest from chapter 4, down to Ward saying something positive about the craftsmen offscreen. Intentional? Could be.

Cool attention to detail, I suppose.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Mr. Matthew's son, Deckard... He left home many years ago, and he never went back. Do you know someone by that name?

Yeah... It was my dad's name...

Oh, shoot! I mean, just from the sidequest title it was easy to see this one coming.

easy but not for dummie-dum here reading stories... 

But also, if someone runs away, wouldn't they change their name to reduce possibilities of being found? Maybe not.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Because... For a long time now, since you've been in this city, I've... I've felt the same way about you...

Ohhhhh! Oho! Isn't that convenient? Turns out, Leon was wrong in every way imaginable! All those men courting her, but she only had eyes for... uh, the random soldier dude she'd never talked to before. Personally, I don't get what she could've seen in him when Derrick was right there up for grabs, but it's her loss.

Ah ofc. Anime must be convenient and so when someone likes someone, they like each other back or it's weird or mean.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes! Yes! Adel has won! Well... No, that's not right. Adel has failed at every turn. It's Lumiere that's done all the work.

Lumiere...!

kewl. Now Adel get's eBic Bussy

 

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, now that I have 5200D...

Woah! Man That ballista is 52,000... You only have 12,000 how can you pay for that??????///???

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hoo, boy... This does not look great.

Yeah, I brought it... I don't want any of it. Just take it and go.

You're a funny guy, Axel... I just don't get how you think. When did you grow a conscience? Was it because of that little girl? Doesn't really matter, I guess. Now that I've got the treasure, I don't care about you anymore. Goodbye, Axel.

Whoa, whoa! Axel!

 

...Doros said the same thing. I don't care about the treasure. But I can't let you live, either.

What's so funny?

Ha ha ha... It's you, Axel! Looking... at your face right now... You know what I see? It's the same look... you had in your eyes... all those years ago...

...!

And you'll end up in the same filthy pit in hell as the rest of us...

...I know. Go on ahead and save a place for me, will you?

 

 

That was something interesting alright.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Goddamnit, someone is cutting onions in my living room again...

So yeah. Axel has sacrificed his last chance at redemption to ensure Ciel's bright future, and believing that he's without hope of salvation, he has proceeded to remove himself from her life, even though she was the only purpose he had in life at this point.

Not sure what it is about this character arc that got me good, but... fuck. I got teary eyed all over again in this second viewing... Damn it all, Axel...

Ouch man... this really sucks...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Like hell it is! I might get you killed before you can stop being an idiot and go back to your daughter! Leave my team, damn you! Leave...! Reese, you're always giving new recruits a hard time! Go on, do your thing!

True, I don't have any particular reason to refuse your request...

REESE

HAHAHAHA! The one time we want Reese to be like he is, he decides not to be difficult...

Coincidentally, I wanna know what Reese thinks of the tactician calling him a psychopath and all that... maybe we could have a character arc where he's not straight-faced out of will or out of nature. Hmm....

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I'd expected it for a long time, but... But Arthur, are you certain...?

I'm afraid so... But I will do all I can to live up to his legacy. Mother, I promise that I will protect you and Mark as a worthy knight.

Arthur...

Ah.... well damn... it sucks because on the one hand Arthur is lying to his mom, but telling her the truth would be painful too... Well Arthur isn't lying if he interpret his words metaphorically I guess, but factually it is.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wind speed is nominal... All right, get ready, men! Fire!

Yay, crown! Reminds me of when you talked about how people perceive spanish as an alien language or sth and used words from it for sciency stuff (though really it's more of a latin thing). Anyways, yes Corona funni, let's move on.

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, and we have good reason to believe so. The materials they've stockpiled would easily be enough to construct at least twenty ballistae. What's more, I don't think the Empire will be waiting much longer before they deploy them. Our scouts have reported large objects covered in dark cloth in the base.

C'mon! That's so rude! The platoon healer isn't fat, he's just a bit chubby!

HAHAHhahahahHahak! lmao...

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, Reiss!

Yes?

Here's an axe.

An axe?! Axes! Yes, give me!

There you go!

Thank you so much for this axe! Do you see that, Pejj?! An axe!

An axe, yes. Pretty bad axe, too.

But still... Axes!

...Sigh...

Axes!

 Hmm? Tactician who's this guy that wants to join the game?

 [Yes I should have used malhumor, whatever, it wasn't immediately findable so my fat ass won't get it, these are my (Nino's) notes btw] Hu-you! Nino! How did one of my readers enter my LP?

Heath.png [Heath is my pfp in other places, in fact everywhere else I go by "Hanes"] I uh... don't know? ...

Axes?

Axes! Hey this guy's perfect! Bring him along next visit!

 (Well he is always here in every update...) Axes! Of course!

Heath.png Axes!



Ok but really this update is perhaps the most enjoyable for me so far, all these side-conversations you made where fun to read, so now I even wanted to make my own.

Que pedo wey a mi ni me usaste en tu side-story de la side-story

Heat.png Se me olvido que estabas ahi, jejejee

Mierda...

 Y ahora porque no estamos hablando en ingles? Hachas!

 Ni idea, Hachas!

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No farewells this time. Gotta change things up from time to time. As they say, variety is the spice of life! So, see ya~!

Ah... well that's a good thing. I'm excited for the next meme!

Have a good one! ... oh wait I forgot to quote something!
 

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Exactly, Lord Reese! That's precisely the case! It's only natural that we've fallen behind the Empire in the development of artillery. The Imperial Army has conscripted entire corps of engineers specifically for designing and testing prototypes... Whereas we are relying on hired workshops and guilds to develop them for us. We can't keep up.

But that gap can be closed by supplementing other areas like high-mobility cavalry, can't it? Wouldn't it be better to focus on outmaneuvering the enemy with what we already have?

Hey credit where credit is due, at least Reese knows strategy, to an extent I mean. But for example the FE7 lords know jack-shit other than the power of friendship.

Also if what we're ding is taking down civilian cargo a la Lusitania then that further expands on Reese's psychopath character.

Venga, son civiles enemigos. Que bien nos hace no matar a posibles futuros soldados enemigos?

Heath.png Maldita sea Reese... 

On 9/17/2020 at 4:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Clifford

Oh yeah also this. Why? I just decided to put it here to remind you.

La mas grande cagada de nuestro tactician

Heath.png Y porque aun lo tienes contratado?

 No veo ninguno mas. Y por si fuera poco tiene buen conocimiento de donde encontrar todos los objetos de Erzheimer y sabe la variedad de enemigos en lugares a los que aun no hemos ido, no se como lo hace pero mola.

 

[Benice]

Spoiler

 

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

An announcement. It's not yet 100% certain, but if I am admitted, I will soon begin some new studies. I have to move, too, though not too far from home. I've got a laptop now, so it shouldn't impact the LP in any major way, but given I'll have less time, I might slow down just a tad.

...On the other hand, the start of the year for my course has been postponed. My best guess is that they're having trouble figuring out how to arrange a classroom full of people with computers (not necessarily laptops, either) while mantaining a safe distance. So even if I'm admitted, I haven't the slightest idea when we'll start. I'll keep you informed, if you care at all, but... yeah. Proceeding as normal for the moment.

Hey, congrats! It's exciting to move on into a new phase of life, and I hope you have a smooth transition! Make sure you take care of yourself and move at any pace you need to for the LP.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...That said, Faye does damage Chaos a bit in the scripted battle. I wonder what happens if he's low enough that she could kill him there...

I think I will go check this out soon, actually!

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't come up with an Ozama pun. Damnit all...

To be fair, only an Ozamaster of puns would be able to find one that's relevant.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

but... Hard pass on the Pascanion. Devil bow is just... no, thanks.

It's possible that my Estie's been hard blessed, (since, as far as I am aware, Weapon skill isn't effected by braketing) but he's been getting bow skill left, right and centre, and his base is quite good, so I don't know if it's that unreasonable to get to 0% devil effect.

...Then again...Level 23...Before chapter 11...

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Chapter 12.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No, you just need a promoted Ruby and he's instantly recruited. You must've also seen all the other Clifford and Ruby events. If you missed one, that's too bad.

I...I guess that's what I did? Oh well.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

That's one of 3H's legit good points. The customization. Sure, it does ruin the difficulty and makes Ironmanning unfeasible, but it's fun to build up unlikely units.

Indeed-I like the choice and options, (heck, I thought that the game would be really good but would be bogged down by the endless monastery sessions, but the opposite occurred-I've liked the monastery quite a bit, but the maps have been...Well...Miklan's map was basically chapter 8 of FE6. Including the game sometimes killing off your unit with nothing you can do about it-I killed Miklan on enemy phase, which caused the whole monster thing to happen, which sends everybody to in front of his position.

...Including my damaged Hilda, who was placed in the range of an enemy archer and was killed. R.I.P Loser, guess she wasn't as tough as she thought.

Anyways, my whole point being that I hope the keep the customization less custom? The amount of options would have made the game impossible to properly balanced, since a bit too tough could softlock, (as maddening eloquently proves) so they have to keep it easy enough for the most pathetic of combos to win.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, fine by me. I can understand why people would like Claude. He's a complete waste of a character, but he's hot, so he appeals to the fanbase.

Eh, I chose him simply because he was irrelevant. It is really sad how Three Houses is basically Two Houses and the copypasta.

Well, that and the fact that Mage Raphael and Warrior Lysithea are both GD.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...in my case, Claude makes me doubly angry because his fellow students are my favorites, but I can't stand him. This resulted in me stealing half of his students in all my runs. And then murdering him with glee.

Am I the only one in the "My favorite two characters in Three Houses are widely recognized as the worst non-Cereal/Cyril character" club? I don't know why Raphael and Ignatz are so reviled...They're, in my opinion, stronger (as characters) than the other people in GD. They kinda remind me of Wade and Lot, actually, in terms of dynamic.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah... Honestly though, it'd kinda sad that Grauve is the best part of Esteban's character arc. Heck, not as much as Burroughs, but he, too, feels like an irrelevant secondary in his own arc.

-10000/10 UPDATE WOULD NOT RECOMMEND

I do kinda agree, though. I don't feel like Estie truly Burrough'd it, but he didn't take centre stage for most of it. He did play an important role in it, at least...

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Are you going to do this every time I lose Faye?

Yes.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No, thank YOU for the compliment!

Thanks! My most recent update on my Berwick LP was very good, I agree!

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Heck yeah, let's go! I mean, we all know that a Three Houses character is going to win, but just the fact that there's KagaSaga characters in the list is enough for me, really.

I mean, Nils beat Edelgard.

Nils.

 

 

Nils.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahahahahahahah...

Why do you think I ended up hating the game?

Yeah, I realize now that it's just gonna be really easy.

Cripes, this turned into a rant. Welp, spoilering it!

Spoiler

 

But still, not meaning to throw anybody under the bus, since everyone views things differently, I heard some very promising things about Three Houses' difficulty, including that Three Houses has the best difficulty curve of any FE, since it starts of easier then gets quite hard around chapter 7. (Which admittedly, I haven't yet reached, but I was already pressing X to doubt at this point, since from what else I'd heard of Three Houses, the difficulty curve was unlikely to be good because a difficulty curve requires difficulty.

...And I was also told that Three Houses is one of the hardest FE games and that it was harder than Thracia. And it had me, you know? I really thought it would be! I game over'd three times in chapter 1! (Mostly due to stupidity, but it punished me for goofing around and not actually placing my weaker units in places where they were safe, and again, I was told that the game's difficulty picked up, and naive as I was three days ago, I thought that Three Houses wouldn't be so popular if it weren't fun.)But then...Map design retired. Or died. I guess. I don't know if it's just me, but the maps are much bigger and emptier than FE6's maps-and those are generally large. Like, in the one in the red canyon, I swear I spent about eight turns just moving across the canyon with my hearty group of 4-movement students.

 

But then I broke the game by accident. I went out of my way to incapacitate multiple units, but the game still snapped right in half. It was really fun to try taking out the Death knight without, "Best character tactical nuke waifu very fun to use Lysithea" as I really did need to think out my moves. I really did like that. And then Lysithea being able to ORKO the boss brought me back to the fact that the enemies were weak sauce. (On that note, dissolving the game isn't really that fun IMO-sometimes, it's very satisfying just to ruin everything with one high-firepower unit, but just trivializing the game isn't. It's awesome just to annihilate everything with Enid and Pallas Leia because you really have to bust your butt to do it, and once you get the payoff, it's phenomenal.

 

So, for me, I have enjoyed some of it, and it's certainly a decent and enjoyable game, yet it's still super disappointing compared to what people say it is. My meme units actually being good and discovering what each unit can do is really fun, but breaking the game by accident isn't. I tried to make the game hard for myself by ruining a really good uni and focusing on a terrible one. Much like Path of Radiance, it's just so...Overrated, y'know? The cast and plot are good, but not THAT good, and the gameplay isn't anywhere near what people say it is-I haven't yet actually had to Turnwheel for any mistakes I made, and you know me. Mistakes are my specialty in terms of FE! (I did have to turnwheel for the Hilda thing, as well as rigging hits for Lysithea in the earlygame because I was too tired to bother moving anyone decent over there.)

 

Also, enemy gambits really, really suck and simply are annoying rather than difficult. I think that one of the biggest problems with FE16 is that it wants to be a player-phase game, but it does it with enemy quality that is danged near 0. I think that this game would have REALLY benefitted from having a Jagen in a class with high movement for the early maps who could deal with those infernal gambits, who are basically "lmao no countering for you, get annoyed" since they weren't dangerous and it's really hard to Player phase when everybody has the same movement as the enemy. I'd rather see them have high enemy quality or give them offense-boosting skills, such as death blow or darting blow so there's actually a reason to take 'em out on player phase...

 

Thank you for listening to my TED talk, please leave a tip.

 

 

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

What an absolute unit, this character that I do not like. Seriously, I know she has good reasons to be angsty, but mercilessly bullying Ignatz for the crime of being a good person made me want to throw her at the Death Knight without dark spikes, not gonna lie.

Yep, me too. I never really liked her, but her being mean to my boy Iggy was too much-

Ignatz: Hi! Hope you're having a great day!

Lysithea: Go away idiot child.

Ignatz: You know, I feel like everybody's exaggerating about you being childish, you're certainly much more mature than me. I don't mind being treated like a child so much, myself, though.

Lysithea: BE ASHAMED OF YOUR VERY EXISTENCE! NOBODY LIKES YOU!

Ignatz: Why am I so insensitive?

 

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

From my experience, on hard difficulty DK is the only challenge the game has to offer outside of the dickmoves that it occassionally pulls to make you waste divine pulse uses. So yeah. Have fun with that.

Hoooooorrrraaaaaaaaaaaaay!

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Have you no sense at all, Vanmilion?! Lord Reese and I are talking! Get out this instant!

Y-Yes... My apologies, Father...

He has vanmillion apologies to make for this.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Your sources are unreliable. His strength blows, as do the rest of his stats. But who cares? He can use ballistae!

Mine got strongth on his first level. Ahahahaaaa!

And then he got hit by the Triple-fire bow. Twice.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Can I get something stupid to nitpick, so I can go back to being my usual dickhead?

Probablyn ot , sinc ethe grammar was good at this spart.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Not as difficult as the other sidequest! That one has assassins! Assassins!

Imagine not knowing those were there and getting your ballistician killed by one. As for why he was over there...

It was a long story...

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon! That's so rude! The platoon healer isn't fat, he's just a bit chubby!

 

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

It is going to Faye. Why?

Because of my threats of assassination?

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

So yeah. Benice's waifu it is.

YE

1/10 UPDATE, WOULD RECOMMEND

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No farewells this time.

Actually...

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

farewell

I'm afraid you are mistaken.

On 9/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Next time, we meet the second-biggest meme among the japanese Berwick fanbase, right behind Derrick. That meme did not survive the transition to english, but it'll still be a bit funny due to unrelated circumstances that I'll be sure to point out.

Oh good, I always wondered what the deal was of Gorzavaleus sharing a portrait with Aethin, the best unit.

(If I actually got Gorzavleus' name right, I will be very proud of myself.)

 

 

[Golb89]

[Addendums/Edits]

Spoiler

On 9/10/2020 at 3:39 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, I've no idea how to even describe that. But I think the fanbase's depiction of Saria might be the ultimate waifu. So there's that.

  https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/itwb4w/whats_your_type/

(This didn't exist when i started typing that comment and then i kept forgetting about it until long after i had already posted it)

 

On 9/10/2020 at 3:39 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Impossible. He'd use his super collector powers to materialize himself next to the vendor before anyone could get to the thing first.

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iq89lj/title/

(Same as the above)

 

[Replies]

Spoiler

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

How dare you. That axe belongs to either Axel or Derrick! Are you called Axel or Derrick? No, right? Then fuck off!

If you had deployed her instead of Derrick, you wouldn't have lost Clifford. Maybe.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

That is not the counter-reference I expected.

But it's the one you deserve get.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! What a shame.

She went to fight the lone and seemingly underarmed boss by herself, got rekt and labeled as an idiot: just like Faye at the beginning of that swamp chapter.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Call me blind, but I cannot see Derrick anywhere. I can only see Satan.

Exactly.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

If he had a hammer, he'd still be profoundly ineffective. Hammers in KagaSaga aren't like hammers in FE. In Vestaria in particular they suck.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gnx02a/whack_a_kroos/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nah, that one's just Valter.

Not sure how you managed to see Valter there: at most she might be Seth instead.

  

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

No, seriously, what's with Arknights and TF2? They have little to do with one another! One is a gacha, whereas the other one is good!

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iw7jkf/e_artist_milra/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

When did Kramer pull an Arkis on me, though?

I expected him to do so in his paralogue: with all the enphasis you were putting on his love for swords, that didn't seem too far-fetched.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Waifus. That's your answer. Shitty business practices are tolerable because... waifus.

Pretty sure your question was how we can tolerate not pulling waifus (and gramps), and the answer to that is quite literally pulling other waifus (especially if they are the ones i actually wanted)

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

New gal? Eh... At least she's covered up, but I don't think I like the design.

On 9/8/2020 at 4:16 AM, Golb89 said:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/imgs3w/my_experience_with_utage/

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iokn6e/utage_apologizes/

(Incidentally, she's the 4* version of the "random old man")

  (Though strictly speaking she IS new)

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

(Yes, I know you've showed her before - last time I didn't really stop to check the design out)

Before the before:

Quote

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/g5ay1y/ggbc_10_a_friendly_smile/

Also, you most likely completely forgot about her too, but in case you were wondering how she's been faring:

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iv2xyy/encephal_zero_chapter_3/

Rest of the episodes conveniently placed here or here, though the current arc can be mostly summarized like this:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iux9g5/pov_you_are_zima_in_the_current_arc_of_nhimzys/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nah just kidding.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Bagpipe? Really?

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Shut up and get out. Your name is so dumb I cannot stand it.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/irbju5/that_special_feeling_when_hiring_bagpipe_art_by_茶冰/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, no. Not one of these. I hate these...!

...these tailors!

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes. This one. This one's better.

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Bleeehhh... I mean, we still have Ward. Not that he can be used in half of the game's maps, but...

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivupsf/rhodes_island_without_exusiai_kumamotoaichi/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iw8jgm/rhodes_island_without_exusiai_omake_by_熊本愛知/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I still don't think I like your jacket. It looks weird.

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/is6m9v/utage_has_some_really_big_clothes/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I really don't think you qualify, though.

Fun fact: her base skill is supposed to increase the probability to find clue #2, but actually finds clue #5 instead, which used to be Indra's specialty before... except very few people have her since she's rare af and thus clue #5 was the rarest of them all (now that's clue #4, aka Istina's specialty)

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Kinky.

It'd actually be rad if she attacked with her nails instead of her sword, especially since her trait basically makes her drain health from the enemies she hits (though that'd apply to her grampa too, which could be awkward...)

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

New one? This one seems... rather unremarkable, actually. She does nothing spectacularly wrong or right. She just... exists. Cool trenchcoat, though.

You've actually seen her before too... kind of.

Also, it's impossible to convey this with images, but her artwork doesn't fit her voice and character in the least: in fact, fancomics usually do a much better job at portraying her actual self.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gy3b3e/chibi_comic_exusiai_and_franka_in_vs/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iadr8a/please_dont_prank_me_franka_by_udon/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/hpz2w8/franka_is_thinking_too_much/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gmqi3x/lizers_with_lizer_6/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gm1mp3/liskarm_birthday_prank_by_franka/

 

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes! Two games I despise, together! That is what I needed this morning! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to commit suicide. Toddles~!

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/ivxb5g/a_number_of_dokutahs_talked_about_fehs_surtr_in/

You are welcome.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Part 59 - The albatross takes off.

Spoiler

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Last time, Clifford died because I'm a complete idiot. Clifford.

Last time:

And that's how Clifford died due to poison damage. Clifford.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Tianna didn't mention that we failed to recover half the treasures, did she...

Also last time:

On 9/17/2020 at 3:04 AM, Golb89 said:

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

But what of the sword Balmung? Surely he wishes to keep that?

It is certainly a valuable relic, but it is ultimately an ordinary sword. We have no immediate need of it.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...There are others who I believe can make better use of it.

Very well... I will notify Kramer to hand over the sword to you, Lord Reese...

......

Quote

On 9/17/2020 at 11:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nah just kidding.

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wonderful! I will tell him, Lord Reese.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Lord... Lord Reese...! I will repay this honor with my own body and soul! I vow to be your loyal servant!

Also, mercenaries before permanent recruitment:

And after:

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahhh, there we go. He just obtains the skill out of thin air. How convenient.

Why not just let him have the skill since the beginning? He IS a 2H swords wielder after all: heck, if i remember correctly even Volo can wield blades and he's (probably) a mirmydon!

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

But wait, wasn't he supposed to have disappeared while chasing after stolen relics in back-alleys markets around the city? Did i accidentally miss an update?

Then again, i DID say he was definitely gonna be alright so...

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon, I lost Verda's treasure and Clifford. Cut me some slack.

Quote

On 9/17/2020 at 3:04 AM, Golb89 said:

 

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

So yeah. We handed a cursed sword over to Erzheimer, and now he's all possessed. Who could've possibly foreseen that?

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, so here's Ward. What will he do now, I wonder? Perhaps he'll remind him of all the loved ones, like his vase, and his orbs...

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Or, he'll just bum-rush the guy. That's fine too.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Bwahahahahahahahaha... Ward: General of Sinon, part-time ghostbuster. He literally busted the ghost out of Erzheimer!

Ward's past revealed:

https://gogoanime.so/category/yuragi-sou-no-yuuna-san

(Somehow, the summary completely omits that hiw way to fight back against ghosts and exorcise them is by literally punchin them in the face)

Maybe.

(That'd explain his hatred for young girls though)

(Also, i do NOT actually recommend that garbage of an anime in the least)

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

The Pyrenees? Ah, so they're coming to Spain, then! I'll be sure to intercept them.

He said "north" though, meaning they are actually moving from Spain to France instead.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait, if it's a known fact that they take that route to avoid the eyes of the law... How come the eyes of the law haven't reinforced the security in that route? Oh wait, right, Volcens is in charge of the eyes of the law. Carry on.

On 9/17/2020 at 3:04 AM, Golb89 said:

  

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I will investigate this

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

May, to be precise.

On 9/17/2020 at 3:04 AM, Golb89 said:

  

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

......

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Jesus fucking Christ, Marcel! She's been manipulated into going to Slaver Central, which is... apparently in northern Spain!

Southern France, actually.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sir Marcel, perhaps you were not aware, but women are more than just dolls that can walk and talk.

But less than dolls that can walk, talk AND shoot, of course.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yet if we do not act, that purity will be sullied by crimes unspeakable.

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Surely you cannot allow that. Is that not so, Sir Marcel? Will you or will you not fulfill your responsibilities as a knight?

...I understand.

And that's how Daoud saved the day instead of Marcel.

Maybe.

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

It won't bring the money back, but I'd give up any amount of money to have my little girl back.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/i2vqzn/dont_make_me_do_this_nian/

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Mr. Savat asked me to fill in for Cecily while she's away. If you're in need of any shields, please don't hesitate to ask!

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/h0cqa0/ah_yes_me_my_girlfriend_and_her_500_pounds_shield/

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

First, Marcel picks up enough shields to solo a couple maps, and some healing. To be honest, I'm not sure two vulneraries will be enough. Maybe I'll have to give him more later, just to be safe.

(Another chance for you to quote this properly)

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sylvis sells her freeze arrows and picks up ember ones.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivbj12/ceobes_vocabulary_by_kiharu/

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

That is that. Next time, snow map with force-deployed knight. Sounds good?

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/df727z/arcticstorm_crisis/

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, it's gonna be great. Pick up your coats, because we'll be heading on an expedition to the frozen peaks!

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/c43inf/this_really_is_arctic_warfare/

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

 

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Until then, you know what you're supposed to do. Same as always! Haha, bye!

Next* episode's preview:

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/clj4ts/record_of_arctic_warfare/

Maybe.

 

*:

On 8/31/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah...

 

[Bonus]

Spoiler

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4A8Sn8ZrPg

 

[Bonus2]

Spoiler

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ir70d7/bruh_why_bagpipe_eats_so_many_t4_roccs/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivu6me/arknights_comic_47_mines_2/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ipzzeq/bagpipe_likes_her_orirock_nice_and_crunchy_byu/

 

Edited September 20, 2020 by Golb89

[Saint Rubenio]

Part 65 - The horseman's redemption.

People die:

Spoiler

On 9/18/2020 at 1:17 AM, Spara said:

  Hide contents

Aren't stools made to be sat on? Is this some kind of elaborate "FE Dads are born to die" joke?

To be honest, I couldn't think of a better line. And since he's a stool, well...

And yeah, FE dads are born to die. Bernstol at least lasted a while.

I dunno, man, my last Burroughs managed to get more non-bracketed Strength levels than Faye in 1/3 of the level ups. He got 2 points while she got 1. 

Hah! That's pretty awesome. Even if strength is completely useless for Burroughs, because ballistae bypass it just like crossbows.

Am I a sadist for thinking The Heretic God is quite possibly the best map in the entire game? I think the only problem with it is just the occasional assassin spawns in the top-left. If Larentia survives, though, I doubt it'll be too bad. 

It is pretty damn awesome in terms of what happens in it. It's also difficult as hell, so I'm terrified of it. And if Larentia dies, well... it's going to be even more difficult as hell.

Also, still kinda sad that Christine died before you could recruit Esteban. He's one of my favorite units to use, even though he sucks (same goes for Adel). Plus, the Pastacannon doesn't backfire at 50 bow skill, so using him in Endgame after training him is a hell of a power trip. My last one could ORKO all of Chaos's squad in that map, in part because I was lucky enough to have him constantly skate the tops of his str/spd brackets (he never leveled defense to make up for it). At least Adel's still here to kick some ass. 

Yeah, Esteban's cool. I'm sad I couldn't use him, but eh. Sylvis exists anyway.

Quick little side-rant here: Living in the US during COVID is honestly pretty depressing. We hit yet another spike in cases, and yet people in Florida are going on maskless, no-social-distancing family parades in department stores (sadly, not even exaggerating -  people will literally go in groups of 10-20, cram down store isles, and shout and yell). A lot of colleges and universities (luckily not mine) still moved all their students to campus, even though very few of them are having actual in-person classes, which exposes both the local community and the communities of the students to more cases just so the schools can charge the students room, board, and other stuff. I'm not usually the cynic, but it's pretty hard to watch. At least some of the state governments are somewhat competent, but that does not make up for the circus shows that are Georgia and Florida. 

The worst part is that it feels like so many Americans are totally averse to putting cloth on their faces. I know of plenty of schools that will send children home for tiny dress code violations, but refuse to take action when someone doesn't wear a mask. 

Yeah, from what I've gathered, the US is kinda falling apart in this pandemic. My heart goes out to you and to all other US readers. Not that Spain is much better off, but... well, not quite the disaster you guys face.

 

On 9/18/2020 at 1:36 AM, Pengaius said:

  Hide contents

Yup, I just lost Catria at Gra Bastion because what reason would there be for a flier to not self recruit in range of a longbow.

Hah, that actually happened to me once! Well, kinda. Marth was helping pin down a sniper against a wall, and then those two just decided to turn blue before the sniper moved.

But hey at least nobody died on wooden cavalry, ha ha... hah.

Congratz for that, at least.

 

 

On 9/18/2020 at 8:10 AM, ranger016 said:

  Hide contents

  Yeah, was thinking that as well, probably will have to restart the map either way thanks to not having enough vulneraries.

Ahh, the eternal problem. Until Owen begins to exist.

Atleast the sword user curse seems to have left, or maybe Faye have been enough sacrifice for this time...

Hahahahahahah... I'd wager the RNGoddess is rather satisfied with Faye's three deaths so far. Three not counting all her scripted ass kickings. The poor girl can't catch a break.

I like reading and lurking more than writing, your LP are probably the first thread where I continued to comment more than once or twice.

I am quite honored! I, too, am more of a lurker than anything. Outside the LPs of course. Imagine being a lurker in your own LP. How would that even work?

Good to know I am not just really bad to use him properly, not getting exp is definitely a minus for him and the other prepromotes not named Sylvis.

I'm not sure if to call Sylvis a prepromote, honestly. She's called sniper, starts off awesome and can't promote, but she also grows really fast and really well (unless your name is Saint Rubenio, apparently), so... it's like, she has the best of both worlds.

Yeah, it's just Kaga being Kaga..

Good ol' Kaga.

Right, I remember getting to use it with Owen as soon as I got it but didn't remember how.

That's probably how. Level 23 is not that difficult for him. Heck, I think my own Owen is level 22 right now.

I have no idea what you are talking about. Ofcourse I knew it was 10000D

Ahahahahah... It's all right, I forgive you. Looking at it again, I can understand the confusion.

I don't think he even remembers sending the Sinon knights in such a mission.

Volcens probably doesn't remember much of anything outside of his daily session of gawking at himself on the mirror.

He did need an excuse for why this mission took so long.

Pffft. True enough.

RIP best dad stool, you were great.

My coffers are going to look so lonely without him...

I think Holmes could compete with him for that position though, too bad Vals didn't die.

I'm not sure that's a fair comparison. Holmes despised his father, and to be honest? Rightfully so. On the other hand, Reese... I don't know, but I think we're supposed to believe that he kinda liked his dad.

Well, knowing Volcens, this was probably the correct decision. He probably would have Reese imprisoned as a traitor if he tried to go back to Sinon.

Volcens would have Reese branded a traitor for taking a little too long to help a band of injured survivors out of a canyon. It really doesn't take much with him.

I was surprised by the lack of response after this letter as well, would it really hurt to have even a simple "..." after this?

That would've been enough, but... meh.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Knowing Reese, I wouldn't even be surprised if you told this actually was in the game.

Hahahahahah... Of course.

Character aside, he is a great unit for defeating annoying opponents like ballistae, crossbowmen and softening up knights.

Oh yeah, he's pretty damn great as a unit.

That was pretty depressing, Axel's character arc is one of my favorites along with Arthur's, hope you can keep both alive by the end...

I hope so too. Arthur's not exactly one of my favorites, but I do like him, and he's my best non-Ward tank right now. Losing him would be problematic. And, well, as for Axel... I've already said multiple times before how his death would break my heart.

Well, telling her the truth would probably hurt their relationship even more, not to mention Harold would probably seen as a traitor if his condition became known.

Yeah, this was clearly the only valid option.

Wise words...

From a man called Corona. Seriously, this is the most Kaga moment ever. How? How did he do it?

Flags everywhere, Ah, but I mean no offense. We need optimism like yours in these difficult times.

Pffft... Ahahahahahahahah, oh you bastard...!

 

 

On 9/18/2020 at 2:57 PM, BrightBow said:

 

  Hide contents

Nah. It has to be Ward. We know he is working for the Empire, after all.

Pffft! True enough. I think you're onto something here.

Good to hear. I spent way to much time coming up with a good way to express that "Trump altering a hurricane map with a sharpie" look.

Hwahahahahahahah... That's a good analogy.

 Initially things were looking up. But after Zephyrus lead a charge against their mothership and destroyed it, the Pyronians panicked and retreated to their home planet, turning the battle in the Empire's favor.

 I suppose in the future I will know better then to doubt your judgement, General.

  Nonsense. I am glad I can at least count on you to question my decisions. These days honest minds are hard to come by in the Imperial army, thanks to Faisal bringing in all those bootlickers

I want a Berwick Saga spinoff that's entirely this. Bernstool and his army of aliens against General Paranoia and OG Levail.

Such a pointless flashback. It didn't add anything that couldn't also have been expressed by Reese simply saying "Father told me to stay loyal to Volcens no matter what happens to Sinon." The only scene he shares with Reese and it's completely wasted.
Fortunately he is better developed in Lynette's letters, at least.

It's kinda sad that he gets more character out of the letters that he doesn't even write than the two scenes where he appears in person.

Why? And how?
Not sure how the state of the entire Western front can be kept from the others.

Yeah, I wondered about this too. You'd think they'd rather hear the news from their lord rather than some gossiper at the tavern.

This cliff scene is so strange.

It really is. I guess it was to be expected, though. Reese is usually incapable of emotion, so when he actually feels a twinge of something, he loses it and begins to act irrationally. By all means, it's likely that Ward told the army the news behind his back. Ward has problems with young girls, but he's nowhere near the heartless monster that Reese appears to be.

Guess Lynette has to pick up the slack and salvage this mess. The cliff scene I mean, not the Western front. I mean, the Western front too. But that's not what I meant in that case.

Her letter really was better than the damn cliff scene.

Yo Reese, how are you feeling about your decision to deny Lynette's request to join the knights of Sinon?

Considering the fact that Adel and Sherlock are the only survivors among the OG knights, I probably would've gotten her killed anyway.

Funnily enough one of the many unused designs of Reese actually wears a circlet like that. Although that one is not even that different from final Reese. It's just the collar and eye color. ...kinda makes me wish he would actually be shown wearing it from her on now, come to think of it. Maybe it could even be his promotion trigger.

That would've been cool, yeah. I like the amount of unused designs there are for Reese. There's Reese, Reese with blue hair and a red cape (which, ironically, fits his unpromoted battle palette better), Reese looking to the left, Reese looking to the left with absolutely fabulous hair, Reese looking to the left with silver hair, badly-drawn Reese...

Must have been nice for her to not be an orphan for a year or so. Too bad.

Jikes...

Not his fault his class doesn't allow to equip accessories.

I guess so, but...

And yeah, it works by being in his inventory. You can see in battle forecasts that enemy crit chances are reduced to 0 now.

He just keeps it in his pocket.

What are you talking about? The world's crappiest father's day ain't over yet.

Let me rest, okay? One can only take so much depression at once.

So are you guys still going to sell those Prototype Spears next chapter or...?

The excuse is just plain weird.

 You can call me Axel. I'm currently 33 years old. Not that you'd care, but I reside in northeast Navaron's villa district. Also, I've yet to marry. In order to make a living, I work as a mercenary. After a long day's work, I return home no later than 8 PM. I don't like smoking, but do enjoy the occasional drink. I'm always in bed by 11 PM, and I make it a point to get no less than 8 hours of sleep each night. Before bed, I drink a warm glass of milk, it's always coupled with 20 minutes of stretching to decompress from the long work day. Sweet dreams are the usual result of this. I then awake as refreshed and recharged as a newborn child, ready to take on the day's challenges, and after my last checkup I was given a clean bill of health.

Hey, what's the big idea creeper? Why are you telling me all this crap?

 For as long as I can remember I've done everything in my power to live a productive life that allows me to pursue a lasting inner peace. This may be a foreign concept, but I choose not to concern my self with winning or losing, life's troubles, or enemies who bring sleepless nights. That is how I cope with this backwards life we find ourselves living. It's what brings me happiness in a world fraught with hardship and misery. Of course, if I were ever to engage in combat, I would win the battle without question.

...

  In other words, Gibry: You are an irksome troublemaker who stands to hinder my sleep. You, old friend, are the enemy.

  But before you have the chance to utter a word of this to another soul, I shall eradicate you.

  I'll sleep soundly tonight. I can already feel it.

I feel there's a reference here. Is this the Yoshiwhatever Kira fellow again? Nah, this doesn't sound like anime dialogue... It's probably from a movie. But I've googled multiple parts that seem quotable and I can't find anything... Please explain the joke to me.

Probably shouldn't have murdered her parents then.

It's never confirmed, you dolt.

He just murdered a guy in cold blood. Stabbed in the back and all.

Well, yeah, but... First: It wasn't a stab, it was an overhead blow. And second: It's Gibry. C'mon, really. Guy threatened to murder a little girl. Are you really about to cry over that guy's corpse just to make Axel look bad? Is that how far you're willing to go?

Guess it's better to miss out on money then to miss out on a chance to stimulate that old murder boner.

Now you're just taking the piss.

 Arthur...

 Yes?

 As someone whose father actually did die for real... I don't think you should let your family believe a lie.

 ...

 

Ohhh man one of my parents died.

 

First time?

 

Oh no, it's actually a lie. He's alive and well.

 

......

We just came from the plague too. And now we got this guy, trying to spread his deadly load over great distances to as many people as possible. Great.

Eerrrgh... not gonna lie, "spread his deadly load" doesn't exactly evoke the image of a terrifying virus. It is still a rather terrifying image, though.

With the destroyed Remagen bridge separating us from the Empire's forces, I don't think we will be sabotaging anything anytime soon.

Of course. They would have a R&D installation near Navaron, miles ahead of the frontline. What was a thinking?

Hey, why bother wasting funds on transportation when you can just build the things within enemy territory? Saves time and money, as long as they don't notice you! And given the enemy is led by Volcens...

 

 

 

On 9/18/2020 at 7:54 PM, Dayni said:

  Hide contents

  I ask myself if that's the case and I'd love to see if someone actually bothered to do a full analysis of the series.

Hmm. I'd be interested in such a thing, too.

More warpskippable only works when you have a sufficient range and certainly you're right there for sure with some (Off the top of my head). Stride, on the other hand...... that's some broken fun. Both together is of course just a recipe for stupid fast clearing. I also usually prefer to deal with most everything, rather not risk having anything left behind. Warp being reusable I think wasn't a bad idea, because there is an incentive to actually use these as opposed to hoarding them "just in case" and its limited use means you need to have the plan to use it in that example (with Cornelia being an easy case).

Fair enough, I suppose.

I was not asking for this.

Oh. Call me a dummy, then.

Eheh, I recruited Dorthea and Annette last.

My real issue is getting around to playing the next two chapters. Because there's a lot of things going on as it stands.

Sheesh... I do hope you are able to continue.

The beauty of it is that the localisers almost certainly didn't realise this. If there's some guy in Treehouse who had played both Genealogy and Berwick before Fates was released that would be insanely unlikely.

Probably not the case... It's an equally insane coincidence, most likely.

Are we still giving fan translators guff over the names?

Yes. Very much, yes. Do you know the amount of people who claimed they'd keep waiting for a third Thracia translation (or learn Japanese) because they changed Safy to Safiya and Sleuf to Schroff? Too many.

Heck, I think it was barely a couple weeks ago that some guy went to the Lil' Manster thread and started bitching all condescendingly about how the translations aren't using the CyL names. Oh no. They're using Callion instead of Corpse. What a nightmare.

The fact that these lists get changes for a game that has no official localisation beyond that list is a bit of a stretch to say that there's no right to do so (This is not a discussion of the quality of those changes). And I must be honest, but the claim that IS can't have any legitmacy over what is their IP seems to be a bit of an extremist position to take.

Hey, I didn't say that. At the end of the day, it's their games, and if they were to translate/remake the games, they'd have every right to change Vergil's name to Belf, even if I hate it. But from things like Carrion and the Nimue and Murdoch mishaps, you can clearly tell that they don't put too much effort into the CyL list. Which is fine, I mean, its sole purpose is for people to click on the faces so they can lose to Camilla and Three Houses characters. Why spend so much time pondering over the best way to translate one of 700~ names?

For this reason, I believe that to claim that fanslations that deviate from this list in any way are completely wrong and not worth using is just plain dumb. Sure, it's the official list of names from IntSys, but at the same time it's such a blatantly obvious quick-fix that I don't think it should be instantly accepted as the absolute truth. If the translator does some research into the original name, and realizes that there's a better translation, go for it. If the translation looks like shit and you want to slightly change it into something that actually sounds like a name, go for it. That's what I think.

That being said, you can say that the only person who could claim that legitimacy is Tsujiyoki as the last person who was around from then who still works with IS in any capacity if we take the logical conclusion. That's of course ignoring that when it comes to the localisation of the games that's not even IS necessarily involved any more. Specifically for Heroes I'm not sure what the dynamic is without checking, but I'm confident in thinking that it's not IS directly over it.

Yeah, you're completely right here. I'll admit, the "IntSys has no say in anything because Kaga left" part was probably going too far, especially considering that IntSys themselves usually aren't in charge of the translations. I take that part back. Sorry.

Sacred Hearts are an image of Jesus Christ that tend to depict him with a bright red heart that is either reflective of light or essentially emit light.

They were more of a thing among older generations here, but they have the association of being holy and of course I can't help but think of a recent documentary where I saw a building blown up and a Sacred Heart untouched by the bomb.

Hah. That's cool.

This has a cursed end.

I wouldn't know, I haven't watched the movie. Because I'm awful like that.

You forgot Shirou being the worst.

It's Shirou. I'd be more surprised if I had remembered.

Reese right now:

MY FIGHT MONEY!

Hahahahahahah... that's why he immediately went to Halfmann with the circlet.

Sheesh, poor Vanmillion, making such an unforced error.

I mean it's apparent for Reese.

I don't think Reese cares. He's Reese.

SO MANY HILLS FOR PEOPLE TO GO TO.

Is Navaron the City of the Hills or no man?

They originally wanted to call it Hillaron, but that sounded stupid.

Reese caring that others could be in danger.

Who is this man and what has he done to Reese?

Is this Kaga doing Those Who Slither In The Dark first?

...I have to say, I still think Nightcrawlers would've been such a better name for them. TWSITD is just so stupidly long. Not that it's their biggest issue. Everything about them is an issue, up to and including what they do to other characters.

Oh, god fucking dammit, me! Would it have killed me to have a good response to this?

Maybe it would've, so let's be happy you didn't.

Feudal systems for you.

Bernstol was too used to the system.

Poor Bernstol. We're talking shit about him after his untimely demise.

See what I mean by Reese thinking about something beyond duty being a sign he's been replaced?

Yes... Clearly something wrong is in the works.

That's a lot going wrong at once. I guess Berwick is breaking at the seams.

Hasn't it been since the beginning of the game?

I think he's officially numbed himself to the pain and killed what little emotion was left.

R.I.P. Reese's tiny heart. It has fully shrivelled up. All the stews in the world couldn't help him now.

I mean, Deckard did manage to do something.

It's a shame it broke him as well. And ensured he didn't see his son grow.

He did something, but was it truly worth it?

I don't necessarily think he wasted it, more that he couldn't find himself following his father and lived his life, even with regrets. Deckard might disagree.

I mean, the fact that he warned his son against following his footsteps is quite telling.

More misunderstandings ended, hooray I guess.

Yahoo.

Derrick probably cares about the past more.

😜

Hey, now... Aren't we jumping to conclusions a bit much?

Almost a relief he died right before his arc could happen.

Sarcasm of course.

Gaaahh...

Brutal, man.

This is why you should have found that avoid gem Gibry.

Gibry cared more for the money. But as it turns out, money can't protect you from axes to the back of the head.

Well, at least he knows it wasn't right.

Right before ending the man quite thoroughly.

Hey, at least he didn't leave him to bleed out in the darkness. That's something.

Me right now:

What an interesting coincidence, that was me the first time watching these scenes.

...And the second.

He's not wrong.

But at least he tried to be better than Gibry, come on!

He tried, and he was, in my opinion. Not that being better than Gibry is too difficult, but I mean, Axel gave everything up for Ciel's sake.

RIP Axel's happiness, why must you have ended it yourself?

Meeehhh...

True.

Also she wasn't adopted by him.

Not quite, but c'mon.

I kinda want a happy end, but Kaga won't.

Well... Actually? Kaga might. You know who might not? The RNGoddess. If Axel dies now, it's going to be the most heartbreaking death in all my LPs. For me, anyway.

That, that's a face hiding the pain, which of course Reese wouldn't realise.

And nobody was surprised.

RIP HarOld.

He dead. Totally.

Reese truly is the baddies.

He's... he's got issues, all right.

Certainly the most pragmatic as well.

Why isn't he working with Roswick to change the- Oh right, Volcens.

Knowing Volcyboy, he probably intentionally underfunds Crown's division just because he's a decent man.

Wait, isn't that the sea?

So we're going to have a sea map, right?

...No. Not at all, in fact. How did you draw that conclusion?

(Hush about Bornia)

Nah, Bornia is next chapter.

Kira wins.

Kira also would save if he just killed Urbanus already.

I'LL TAKE A POTATO CHIP

AND   E A T   I T   !

AXES

TOOLS FOR WOODCUTTING!

And also Gibrycutting.

Buff Myrmidon!

Buff! Buff!

So I assume that's for Chaos.

You assume correctly. Or... do you?

So for another Aggretsuko, turns out another character is voiced by Edelgard's VA and she's in a superior position to Bernetsuko, which of course got more noticeable when she starts helping her. Once again, thanks 3H.

I still don't think anything will ever top the fact that Peppy Hare was voiced by the TF2 soldier. Do you have any idea the amount of hours I played Star Fox 64 on my Wii U, and yet I had no idea until the man died?

Off topic, the 3DS is finally dead. Also my laptop returned.

Is it? Damn... Let us have an F in chat.

Also on courses, I've got one starting too next week. It's part time though.

My situation's... uh, muddier, let's leave it at that.

 

On 9/19/2020 at 1:47 AM, Golb89 said:

Show them these comics and they'll all behave:

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fm5ces/covid19_awareness_message/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fqydrv/covid19_awareness_message_part_2/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fma0eo/a_covid19_situation_update_from_rhodes_island/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/fumvzx/spread_the_word_not_the_virus/

Maybe.

If there is one thing we humans are good at, it's being stupid. I'm not sure if even anime girls would be enough to dissaude people.

 

On 9/19/2020 at 6:11 AM, This boi uses Nino said:

  Hide contents

I see... I've been in school for some time now, I forget if I asked you before, but what are you going to study?

It's another programming course. But... well, there's been a bit of a change of plans.

Ah.... heeheehee... the Valtome laugh? I have no idea what you mean.

Grrr... I'll have you know, I find Valtome to be the most offensive, disgusting, ridiculous character in all of Tellius. So if you wanted to get me ranting...!

You have not succeeded. That's really all I have to say about him.

Bomb Mexico? Well it's only fair for my threat to bomb Spain...

Yes, I do believe bombing Mexico would be a fairly adequate course of action.

Nah it was pretty funny... though dark...

Yeah, but I still feel bad. This is my favorite arc we're pissing on...

I actually usually forget what I'm replying to, but these out-of-context lines confuse me so now I have my previous responses up to see what's up hehehe...

Ahh, it happens to you too!

Awful? It's great! Even better all those lines (except the last one) are in the bible, the book of revelations iirc.

Yeah, I don't deny that. I meant "awful" in a good way. Probably should've made it more clear. I forgot that people can't read my mind for a second.

Ok Ben Shapiro.

Saint Rubenio DESTROYS Boi who uses bad unit with FACTS and LOGIC

Legit he be like "Let's say for the sake of argument that scenario that is not practically possible in any way happened, what would you do now huh? Checkmate atheists/liberals/college students".

M Y   W I F E   I S   A   D O C T O R

A long time ago I read somewhere that they help protect you from light above, like the sun and what not...

That's cool too. Who knew eyebrows were so useful.

What... omg look maybe it sounds bad but it's not. Play it!

Hahaha, don't worry, I'm just messing with ya. I'll put it in the list. So far it's a list with games in it. The 25 it'll have one new game. Maybe. See if you can guess which one it is.

>big-shot

Sure. I know very little lol, I like Nocturne a lot and that's it so war. Also played Devil Survivor 2.

Play Giten Megami Tensei. Very pleasant game, from what I've heard.

I... isn't this the one I was talking about? I didn't know that Claudia was her name but I did read it.

Ahh, well, that's fine then, no problem.

Really? Well iirc there was, but oh well. If I'm not a lazy fat-ass I'll look for it.

Hah!

Did you make it? Woah! That's pretty epic man!

Yeah. One of these days I really should share my sheet of sprites. They're nothing too amazing, but I'm rather proud of a few of them.

Well I have started, in a sense I guess. I started my FE7 LP but on Youtube (and non ironman), here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKSVCfxf7_o&t

Eyyyyy! Let me give you a like.

Yes the voice... it's embarrassing : (

Hahahahahahaha, you sound like a regular person with a cold!

Wait... "como hacer tu fnaf fanmade"? Ahahahahahahah! That's not something I was expecting to see there. No offense or anything, it's just... really not what I was expecting.

Oh my God and you used a note to type the instructions on camera... All that video was missing is this.

Ah, I thought if the courier died they wouldn't show up, I thought that's why you were so pent up over it.

They would've showed up later, according to the experts. In fact, now that I think about it, one time I killed the courier and the reinforcements showed up on top of Reese while he made his way to the spy.

Oh, well let me check it...

ah yeah it was definitely something alright, though I didn't mind it much.

Aww... Well, it's all right.

Ah! Hehehe... I goofed.... I dun goof'd. Haha... Imagine IF IT WAS 100,000! Ahhhh....

If it was 100,000 it'd be great. Unfortunately, Berwick Saga is a well designed game.

...Most of the time.

Th-then the meme is dead? no more inb4 Ruben's? Ha! The chain has been broken even from it's theoretical plausible revival... !

Ahah, I have foiled you! A winner is me!

It's alright... I'm one day late because I was grounded yesterday... yeah... but today is good.

Grounded? Whatever did you do? Were you caught playing Fiya Emburem when you should've been studying?

Hey you missed my standalone post on how I beat Gaiden and updated my colors. Oh well I'll say it again. I beat gaiden and it was fun, well some parts were fun, others weren't. Alm with a bow is epic

You can have Alm equip a bow? What...? How!?

Also, yeah, I missed the post, sorry. Let me check out the rankings...

Well, damn! You've played far more games than I have, lol.

Hahaha! Ah new meme... lol!

Maybe. Or maybe not. It's not as funny as Bernstool, I'm afraid...

Huh, I thought maybe Berwick would let him live... damn.

Yeah, the red flags are pretty obvious, but he makes it so far that one starts to hope.

Oh a minor? I should have expected that I guess. Was Sigurd the only adult lord we had with Kaga? I don't actually know.

Hmmm... TRS Runan was like 16, Vestaria Zade may've even been 15 if I recall correctly, Alm and Marth were definitely minors, heck Seliph even looks like a girl that's how young he is...

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe book 2 Marth made it to 18. Maybe. Beyond that, though, yeah. Sigurd.

Also, Ward. I know he doesn't look like a Kaga lord, but he's very much a Kaga lord. I mean, he game overs you if he dies!

Also I'm still waiting to see what happens with Reese, allow me to continue reading...

Go!

pfft... haahaha!

Another peeve of mine, father. Like does anyone irl call their dad father? It's such a weird way to call someone, like you would call them that when mentioning them to someone else, not to your dad himself.

I'm pretty sure this is a thing of the past. Back when people were more formal, and it was more important to show your parents proper respect. Also back when father could beat son without repercussion, and mother was a maid without pay.

...I... don't think those were such good ol' times.

Ok so like I told you before, it makes no sense that these are BernStooool's last words "as a father", what's up with them?

You're asking me? I don't fuckin' know either!

And repeating father a million times, and saying the absolute worst last words "as a father"... like B R UH, what was that?

I think it's as I said: Reese inherited his cold heart made of stone from his father.

Actually this comment on his words should go up... give me one second...

Ok I just wrote it atop the previous quoted thing, now messy timelines for replies are canon in my posts, uwee hee hee, Bwahahaha! kee hee hee! Yar har har! Mwahahaha!

You are EVIL! You're more of a schemer than Claude! You actually make schemes, for one thing.

I'm sure at this point Kaga wasn't even trying to make him into a psychopath and now we find symbolism and whatnot of it through small details...

I don't think he was ever trying to do that. It just happened. Maybe he felt Runan losing his cool a couple of times in TRS was too much emotion for his Marth lord.

Hehehe, this was a good side-plot. Also I love how Conman's file isn't even capitalized, it's as motivated as he is that it doesn't even have proper capitalization.

Back then I named him after his profession. I hadn't yet come up with the idea to characterize him as a reluctant loan shark with a heart of gold. If I could I'd probably change more than a couple names at this point.

Cool attention to detail, I suppose.

It is neat. Berwick Saga 10/10 game.

easy but not for dummie-dum here reading stories... 

Hah! It's fine, don't worry about it. As long as you're smart enough to realize Volcens is a dumbass...

But also, if someone runs away, wouldn't they change their name to reduce possibilities of being found? Maybe not.

Ehh, I don't think he'd bother. It's not like he was running away with their money.

Ah ofc. Anime must be convenient and so when someone likes someone, they like each other back or it's weird or mean.

It always seems to be one extreme or the other with anime, eh...

kewl. Now Adel get's eBic Bussy

EBIC

Woah! Man That ballista is 52,000... You only have 12,000 how can you pay for that??????///???

Inflation. Denariis are worth shit these days. Rumors say it's because King Volcens had the brilliant idea to print money. He forgot that denariis are coins.

That was something interesting alright.

Yes, very grey morality.

Ouch man... this really sucks...

Is really does, does it not?

HAHAHAHA! The one time we want Reese to be like he is, he decides not to be difficult...

Fuck him, seriously.

Coincidentally, I wanna know what Reese thinks of the tactician calling him a psychopath and all that... maybe we could have a character arc where he's not straight-faced out of will or out of nature. Hmm....

I don't think it's anything to worry about, as long as I am able to fulfill my duty to my liege and my promise to my father.

Spoken like... like you, Reese. Spoken like you.

I WOULD STILL TREAD LIGHTLY IF I WERE YOU, WORM

Aaaack!

Ah.... well damn... it sucks because on the one hand Arthur is lying to his mom, but telling her the truth would be painful too... Well Arthur isn't lying if he interpret his words metaphorically I guess, but factually it is.

Arthur be like "what I said was true... from a certain point of view."

Yay, crown! Reminds me of when you talked about how people perceive spanish as an alien language or sth and used words from it for sciency stuff (though really it's more of a latin thing).

I just know that I found it funny that he was named Corona. You know, even before the Corona happened.

Anyways, yes Corona funni, let's move on.

Please.

HAHAHhahahahHahak! lmao...

It ain't lmao-worthy! The poor healer...

Axes!

 Hmm? Tactician who's this guy that wants to join the game?

 [Yes I should have used malhumor, whatever, it wasn't immediately findable so my fat ass won't get it, these are my (Nino's) notes btw] Hu-you! Nino! How did one of my readers enter my LP?

Heath.png [Heath is my pfp in other places, in fact everywhere else I go by "Hanes"] I uh... don't know? ...

Axes?

Axes! Hey this guy's perfect! Bring him along next visit!

 (Well he is always here in every update...) Axes! Of course!

Heath.png Axes!

Ahahahahahah... Good one. I like how the formatting is a complete mess.

Ok but really this update is perhaps the most enjoyable for me so far, all these side-conversations you made where fun to read, so now I even wanted to make my own.

I'm happy to hear that.

Que pedo wey a mi ni me usaste en tu side-story de la side-story

Heat.png Se me olvido que estabas ahi, jejejee

Mierda...

 Y ahora porque no estamos hablando en ingles? Hachas!

 Ni idea, Hachas!

Let's talk in german now! Uh... Auf wiedersehen dummkopf!

Ah... well that's a good thing. I'm excited for the next meme!

Hah! Very well, then.

Have a good one! ... oh wait I forgot to quote something!

Oh no!

Hey credit where credit is due, at least Reese knows strategy, to an extent I mean. But for example the FE7 lords know jack-shit other than the power of friendship.

I wonder how a meeting between them would go. They're emotional guys with no knowledge of anything practical, while Reese is quite competent but also a heartless psychopath.

Also if what we're ding is taking down civilian cargo a la Lusitania then that further expands on Reese's psychopath character.

Ahahahahah!

Nah, that was Holmes in TRS.

Venga, son civiles enemigos. Que bien nos hace no matar a posibles futuros soldados enemigos?

Será hijo de p--

Heath.png Maldita sea Reese... 

Oh yeah also this. Why? I just decided to put it here to remind you.

Cabrón...

La mas grande cagada de nuestro tactician

Heath.png Y porque aun lo tienes contratado?

 No veo ninguno mas. Y por si fuera poco tiene buen conocimiento de donde encontrar todos los objetos de Erzheimer y sabe la variedad de enemigos en lugares a los que aun no hemos ido, no se como lo hace pero mola.

Wait-- Reese! Since when do you speak spanish?

Sp... anish...?

Yeah, spanish!

What are you talking about, tactician? This is the dialect of the Ligan region!

Wait, what...? Isn't that right below us-- Wait, hold up! If they speak spanish in the country to the south... we're speaking english here... and Volcens... then that means...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I'M SERVING THE UNITED STATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!

United... what? I mean, I guess we ARE a union of states... But it's called the Berwick League, if you forgot.

 

 

 

On 9/19/2020 at 8:33 AM, Benice said:

  Hide contents

Hey, congrats! It's exciting to move on into a new phase of life, and I hope you have a smooth transition! Make sure you take care of yourself and move at any pace you need to for the LP.

Well, corona has made things rather inconvenient. I'll have to find something else to do with myself the rest of the year.

I think I will go check this out soon, actually!

Please do, and let me know of the results.

To be fair, only an Ozamaster of puns would be able to find one that's relevant.

Hah! You bastard, you.

It's possible that my Estie's been hard blessed, (since, as far as I am aware, Weapon skill isn't effected by braketing) but he's been getting bow skill left, right and centre, and his base is quite good, so I don't know if it's that unreasonable to get to 0% devil effect.

Well, his growth is pretty good, it's not that surprising. 80%, to be precise. Holy moly.

...Then again...Level 23...Before chapter 11...

That probably helps, too. I used him in my second run and I don't think he ever got Pursuit at all! Though, to be fair, in this game I tend to not stick to one particular team. I like using a lot of people. That's bad for anyone's individual growth.

Ahahahahahahah... I like how you can hear AVGN go "cutscenes" at the start of the video.

Incidentally, what's with people and Ruby profile pictures? You have adopted her portrait, Brightbow has her combat animations... what gives?

I...I guess that's what I did? Oh well.

A shame. But he's too good for you, anyway. Literally!

Indeed-I like the choice and options, (heck, I thought that the game would be really good but would be bogged down by the endless monastery sessions, but the opposite occurred-I've liked the monastery quite a bit, but the maps have been...Well...Miklan's map was basically chapter 8 of FE6. Including the game sometimes killing off your unit with nothing you can do about it-I killed Miklan on enemy phase, which caused the whole monster thing to happen, which sends everybody to in front of his position.

...Including my damaged Hilda, who was placed in the range of an enemy archer and was killed. R.I.P Loser, guess she wasn't as tough as she thought.

Rest in pieces, character I also don't like.

Anyways, my whole point being that I hope the keep the customization less custom? The amount of options would have made the game impossible to properly balanced, since a bit too tough could softlock, (as maddening eloquently proves) so they have to keep it easy enough for the most pathetic of combos to win.

Yeah, I agree with you here.

Eh, I chose him simply because he was irrelevant. It is really sad how Three Houses is basically Two Houses and the copypasta.

I like dumb things too, but Claude... infuriates me, because I can't help but wonder... If they didn't have to waste budget, resources and time on developing Claude, would the rest of the game have been better?

Well, that and the fact that Mage Raphael and Warrior Lysithea are both GD.

Mage Raphael. I love it.

Am I the only one in the "My favorite two characters in Three Houses are widely recognized as the worst non-Cereal/Cyril character" club? I don't know why Raphael and Ignatz are so reviled...They're, in my opinion, stronger (as characters) than the other people in GD. They kinda remind me of Wade and Lot, actually, in terms of dynamic.

Hah! I agree, actually. Not so much Raphael, but Ignatz is one of my favorites. I like his design, and I like his personality and character too, even if it's rather simple. Heck, I like him better than a lot of the guys with sob stories that everyone loses their heads over. I don't care if Sylvain has "good reasons" to act like he does, he's a misogynistic piece of shit.

More than anything, though, I like Ignatz's transition to the timeskip. Legit one of the best changes in the entire game. Not only is his updated design one of my top 3 designs in the entire game, he also becomes an absolute badass. Seriously, when he went "I wasn't about to let you go" I was like "wha--that my boy Iggy? Really?!"

Lastly, "Let me paint you a picture!" Up there with "Aha! A weakpoint!" for my favorite critical quotes in the game. He's just great all around. But, of course, people don't like good characters, so Ignatz and Hanneman are forgotten, Leonie is hated and Hilda, Dorothea and Claude are the fan favorites. Yuck.

-10000/10 UPDATE WOULD NOT RECOMMEND

Gaaah!

I do kinda agree, though. I don't feel like Estie truly Burrough'd it, but he didn't take centre stage for most of it. He did play an important role in it, at least...

Yeah, "irrelevant" secondary was going too far. He was just a secondary, not an irrelevant one. Burroughs is the one who does absolutely nothing in his own arc. Which is rather meta humor, when you think about it. It's like even Kaga didn't like his bragging, so he messed with him by making him completely useless.

Yes.

...Is it really necessary?

Thanks! My most recent update on my Berwick LP was very good, I agree!

Hey... Ahh, it's fine. I agree with you there too.

I mean, Nils beat Edelgard.

Nils.

 

 

Nils.

I am rather proud of Serenes. Though not as much as I could be.

Yeah, I realize now that it's just gonna be really easy.

Cripes, this turned into a rant. Welp, spoilering it!

Yes! Rant! Gimme gimme gimme.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

But still, not meaning to throw anybody under the bus, since everyone views things differently, I heard some very promising things about Three Houses' difficulty, including that Three Houses has the best difficulty curve of any FE, since it starts of easier then gets quite hard around chapter 7. (Which admittedly, I haven't yet reached, but I was already pressing X to doubt at this point, since from what else I'd heard of Three Houses, the difficulty curve was unlikely to be good because a difficulty curve requires difficulty.

...And I was also told that Three Houses is one of the hardest FE games and that it was harder than Thracia. And it had me, you know? I really thought it would be! I game over'd three times in chapter 1! (Mostly due to stupidity, but it punished me for goofing around and not actually placing my weaker units in places where they were safe, and again, I was told that the game's difficulty picked up, and naive as I was three days ago, I thought that Three Houses wouldn't be so popular if it weren't fun.)But then...Map design retired. Or died. I guess. I don't know if it's just me, but the maps are much bigger and emptier than FE6's maps-and those are generally large. Like, in the one in the red canyon, I swear I spent about eight turns just moving across the canyon with my hearty group of 4-movement students.

 

But then I broke the game by accident. I went out of my way to incapacitate multiple units, but the game still snapped right in half. It was really fun to try taking out the Death knight without, "Best character tactical nuke waifu very fun to use Lysithea" as I really did need to think out my moves. I really did like that. And then Lysithea being able to ORKO the boss brought me back to the fact that the enemies were weak sauce. (On that note, dissolving the game isn't really that fun IMO-sometimes, it's very satisfying just to ruin everything with one high-firepower unit, but just trivializing the game isn't. It's awesome just to annihilate everything with Enid and Pallas Leia because you really have to bust your butt to do it, and once you get the payoff, it's phenomenal.

 

So, for me, I have enjoyed some of it, and it's certainly a decent and enjoyable game, yet it's still super disappointing compared to what people say it is. My meme units actually being good and discovering what each unit can do is really fun, but breaking the game by accident isn't. I tried to make the game hard for myself by ruining a really good uni and focusing on a terrible one. Much like Path of Radiance, it's just so...Overrated, y'know? The cast and plot are good, but not THAT good, and the gameplay isn't anywhere near what people say it is-I haven't yet actually had to Turnwheel for any mistakes I made, and you know me. Mistakes are my specialty in terms of FE! (I did have to turnwheel for the Hilda thing, as well as rigging hits for Lysithea in the earlygame because I was too tired to bother moving anyone decent over there.)

 

Also, enemy gambits really, really suck and simply are annoying rather than difficult. I think that one of the biggest problems with FE16 is that it wants to be a player-phase game, but it does it with enemy quality that is danged near 0. I think that this game would have REALLY benefitted from having a Jagen in a class with high movement for the early maps who could deal with those infernal gambits, who are basically "lmao no countering for you, get annoyed" since they weren't dangerous and it's really hard to Player phase when everybody has the same movement as the enemy. I'd rather see them have high enemy quality or give them offense-boosting skills, such as death blow or darting blow so there's actually a reason to take 'em out on player phase...

 

Thank you for listening to my TED talk, please leave a tip.

 

I've nothing to add. I agree with all of this entirely.

Yep, me too. I never really liked her, but her being mean to my boy Iggy was too much-

Ignatz: Hi! Hope you're having a great day!

Lysithea: Go away idiot child.

Ignatz: You know, I feel like everybody's exaggerating about you being childish, you're certainly much more mature than me. I don't mind being treated like a child so much, myself, though.

Lysithea: BE ASHAMED OF YOUR VERY EXISTENCE! NOBODY LIKES YOU!

Ignatz: Why am I so insensitive?

Yeah... It's really awful. In the B support he finally gets sick of her shit and lashes out at her (by which I mean, he yells at her to leave him alone already), and she literally goes, and I quote, "Maybe I...went a bit far that time... But he's so stubborn despite his ineptitude. I can't just leave it be. He's so foolish—constantly making a mess of things." Yeah, how about I make a mess of your face until you apologize to the man? At least she calms down in the A support... But unfortunately, it's not as satisfying as it should be, because she never apologizes.

The worst part is that I've seen people defending Lysithea. Saying stupid shit like "she just wants him to man up!". Oh, yeah? Then I guess all those victims of bullying committing suicide at the ripe age of 12 were just little pussies, huh? At some point, even the cute smol waifu with the terrible sob story has to be held accountable. If she's an asshole, she's an asshole. And before someone says it - yes, I know she has "reasons". Well, guess what, that doesn't excuse being a piece of shit to the kindest person in the academy.

Hoooooorrrraaaaaaaaaaaaay!

Yay... rejoicing...

He has vanmillion apologies to make for this.

Hahahahahah! I'll never get tired of Vanmilion puns, seriously. Even though we've already made, like, vanmillion of these puns.

Mine got strongth on his first level. Ahahahaaaa!

Well, we'll see about my Burrie!

...Nah, I like Burroughs better. I don't know what it is about that name, but it feels so... satisfying to say. Burroughs.

And then he got hit by the Triple-fire bow. Twice.

...Oof...

Probablyn ot , sinc ethe grammar was good at this spart.

...You did that on purpose, I'm assuming.

Either way, this hurt to read.

Imagine not knowing those were there and getting your ballistician killed by one. As for why he was over there...

It was a long story...

Long is right, it must've taken you like 12 turns to get him there, just to die!

I humbly thank you for your recognition.

Because of my threats of assassination?

No.

YE

1/10 UPDATE, WOULD RECOMMEND

O-One!? You son of a bi--

Actually...

I'm afraid you are mistaken.

How dare you.

Oh good, I always wondered what the deal was of Gorzavaleus sharing a portrait with Aethin, the best unit.

Explanation just below.

(If I actually got Gorzavleus' name right, I will be very proud of myself.)

No. No you did not. It's Gorzevalus.

 

 

10 hours ago, Golb89 said:

[Addendums/Edits]

  Hide contents

  https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/itwb4w/whats_your_type/

Pfft...

(This didn't exist when i started typing that comment and then i kept forgetting about it until long after i had already posted it)

I forgive your crimes.

Except the crime of talking to me about gacha games constantly.

...Nah, I forgive you for that one too.

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iq89lj/title/

(Same as the above)

She kinda looks like Clara, though. How's that work?

 

[Replies]

  Hide contents

If you had deployed her instead of Derrick, you wouldn't have lost Clifford. Maybe.

If I had deployed her instead of Derrick, the game wouldn't be my favorite game because it'd have shitty Arknight characters instead of Derrick.

But it's the one you deserve get.

I guess that's it, then.

She went to fight the lone and seemingly underarmed boss by herself, got rekt and labeled as an idiot: just like Faye at the beginning of that swamp chapter.

Hah! I see now.

Exactly.

Grr...

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gnx02a/whack_a_kroos/

I like this piece of fanart. I don't like the guy's hair, but I appreciate the sentiment.

Not sure how you managed to see Valter there: at most she might be Seth instead.

 Isn't she the one acting all creepy in other fanarts? That's very Valterish.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iw7jkf/e_artist_milra/

You know, this guy disembowels baboons to harvest their hearts so he can put them in people. AND he lost his medical license. Are you sure you want him around your beloved animal waifus?

I expected him to do so in his paralogue: with all the enphasis you were putting on his love for swords, that didn't seem too far-fetched.

Well, no.

Pretty sure your question was how we can tolerate not pulling waifus (and gramps), and the answer to that is quite literally pulling other waifus (especially if they are the ones i actually wanted)

I guess that works when you like every single characer. But when you're me trying to play Heroes, and you pull like five of the same Fates ninja instead of Wrys, well... leaves a sour taste in the mouth, y'know?

  (Though strictly speaking she IS new)

Ah.

Before the before:

Also, you most likely completely forgot about her too, but in case you were wondering how she's been faring:

I wasn't. I don't really spend much time wondering about Arknights characters. I have better things to think about, like the fact that we're all going to die one day.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iv2xyy/encephal_zero_chapter_3/

I cannot say I understand what's going on.

Rest of the episodes conveniently placed here or here, though the current arc can be mostly summarized like this:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iux9g5/pov_you_are_zima_in_the_current_arc_of_nhimzys/

Whoa!

Every time I see this gal's name, I think of Franco. Franco being the fascist dictator that ruled Spain up to 1975, when he died of old age. So yeah. This fellow.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/irbju5/that_special_feeling_when_hiring_bagpipe_art_by_茶冰/

She even has a scottish pattern on her skirt...

...these tailors!

This kind of character is so boring. They're the same every time.

Yes. Good. More of this one, and I'll sigh slightly less loud when I receive the notifications that you've replied to the thread.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivupsf/rhodes_island_without_exusiai_kumamotoaichi/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iw8jgm/rhodes_island_without_exusiai_omake_by_熊本愛知/

Ah.

I don't understand, what even is an Excusesai supposed to be?

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/is6m9v/utage_has_some_really_big_clothes/

Yeah, that rihgt there is why I don't like her design. It's weird.

Fun fact: her base skill is supposed to increase the probability to find clue #2, but actually finds clue #5 instead, which used to be Indra's specialty before... except very few people have her since she's rare af and thus clue #5 was the rarest of them all (now that's clue #4, aka Istina's specialty)

Ah, thanks for the information.

What in the world are you talking about, though...?

It'd actually be rad if she attacked with her nails instead of her sword, especially since her trait basically makes her drain health from the enemies she hits (though that'd apply to her grampa too, which could be awkward...)

That'd take effort on the devs' part. And it's not like they want to make a good game. Long as the cash keeps flowing in...

You've actually seen her before too... kind of.

Well... Okay.

Also, it's impossible to convey this with images, but her artwork doesn't fit her voice and character in the least: in fact, fancomics usually do a much better job at portraying her actual self.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gy3b3e/chibi_comic_exusiai_and_franka_in_vs/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iadr8a/please_dont_prank_me_franka_by_udon/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/hpz2w8/franka_is_thinking_too_much/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gmqi3x/lizers_with_lizer_6/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gm1mp3/liskarm_birthday_prank_by_franka/

Ah, so instead of unremarkable her character is kinda garbage. Got it.

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/ivxb5g/a_number_of_dokutahs_talked_about_fehs_surtr_in/

You are welcome.

Yes! Yes! By far the worst part of a franchise I like, plus the game that I don't like! Good! Best crossover!

 

  Hide contents

Last time:

And that's how Clifford died due to poison damage. Clifford.

Yes.

Also last time:

 

You really like this one, don't you?

 

Yey, anime.

Also, mercenaries before permanent recruitment:

And after:

That's not nearly depressing enough to represent Axel.

Why not just let him have the skill since the beginning? He IS a 2H swords wielder after all: heck, if i remember correctly even Volo can wield blades and he's (probably) a mirmydon!

To be honest, I don't get it either.

Money.

But wait, wasn't he supposed to have disappeared while chasing after stolen relics in back-alleys markets around the city? Did i accidentally miss an update?

No, you didn't miss anything. He just returns after that scene, no fanfare or anything.

Then again, i DID say he was definitely gonna be alright so...

Yes, you were quite correct.

 

 

Oblivion potatoheads are too funny, I swear.

Ward's past revealed:

https://gogoanime.so/category/yuragi-sou-no-yuuna-san

Yeah, one glance at the cover art and I can safely tell you that's not it.

Either that, or that's how he gained his burning hatred for young girls.

(Somehow, the summary completely omits that hiw way to fight back against ghosts and exorcise them is by literally punchin them in the face)

Hah! It really is like Ward!

Maybe.

(That'd explain his hatred for young girls though)

Hah! See, you agree: Generic anime sucks!

(Also, i do NOT actually recommend that garbage of an anime in the least)

Oh.

...Well, that's not something I was expecting. It looks like all the rest to me.

He said "north" though, meaning they are actually moving from Spain to France instead.

Well, who cares.

  

  

Hah! I think I played the GBA game once. I didn't get far.

Southern France, actually.

It's both, goddamnit!

But less than dolls that can walk, talk AND shoot, of course.

Sylvis would kick her ass. That's all I have to say.

And that's how Daoud saved the day instead of Marcel.

Maybe.

Hah!

Yes. Yes you are. I hate your kind. It's so transparent... nothing more than a vapid attempt at waifu-bait. You have no character, goddamnit! None!

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/i2vqzn/dont_make_me_do_this_nian/

Wha... what? Am I witnessing rape? Should I call the cops...?

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/h0cqa0/ah_yes_me_my_girlfriend_and_her_500_pounds_shield/

I've seen this one before!

(Another chance for you to quote this properly)

There it is!

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivbj12/ceobes_vocabulary_by_kiharu/

That is too appropriate for comfort.

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/df727z/arcticstorm_crisis/

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/c43inf/this_really_is_arctic_warfare/

Uh... yes, all of this, kinda.

Next* episode's preview:

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/clj4ts/record_of_arctic_warfare/

Maybe.

No, I would doubt so.

*:

Hah...

Uh... kinda, yes.

 

[Bonus]

  Hide contents

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4A8Sn8ZrPg

That's kind of a random bonus. It's good, though, so I don't mind.

 

[Bonus2]

  Hide contents

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ir70d7/bruh_why_bagpipe_eats_so_many_t4_roccs/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ivu6me/arknights_comic_47_mines_2/

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/ipzzeq/bagpipe_likes_her_orirock_nice_and_crunchy_byu/

A most riveting story.

 

 

When they are killed*:

Spoiler

Le map music.

Le map team. I know, two knights. Next map is not kind to them, and I'd like them to get some screentime in this chapter, so here they are.

Le map full view. I like this one. See all those barriers? They're breakable. The whole shtick of this map is that we're supposed to open up some paths for us, without leaving the enemy too many openings. The object is to seize the fort on the upper right corner, but we'll also want to destroy the barracks. Not only do they spawn reinforcements, they also contain items.

Let's go. Today's Imperial commander is Gorzevalus, who is a meme in Japan. Aethin explained the reason to me: Gorzevalus's japanese name is ゴーゼワロス.

ゴーゼ looks like an emoji, as you can plainly see, and ワロス is a slang for laughing. Thus, people found him very risible indeed, leading to stuff like this video's existence (notice the date), or this thing that Aethin sent to me:

It's a shame that there was no way for this meme to survive the translation, but thankfully, I still have the perfect filename for this guy.

Prepare to launch our counter-offensive!

Sir, we've only just finished working on the defensive wall, and it'll take time to get everyone ready...

You bloody imbeciles! The enemy is right there! Grab some men who look ready and send them out to meet them!

But sir...! We need more time to---

We either defend this base now, or we die trying! You got that?!

Sir, yes sir!

Simple objectives today.

First turn consists of moving.

...Yeah, that's it.

Bedeviled fiends... Fine then! We'll have to use our new weapon! Mobilize the springalds!

We've only got a handful that are actually built and tested!

We've got no other choice!

But they're just not finished! And the ballisticians haven't been trained to use them properly yet!

As long as it shoots, I don't care! We'll find someone to do it! Now hurry up and get them ready for deployment!

Understood... They should be able to handle about two shots, the way they are... Get the springalds ready!

Hell...!

Ballistae with 80% hit. Holy... shit. F durability is awful, though. A shame I can't capture this guy. The springald, even if it'd break in no time, could be useful, and Burroughs could use the extra bolts.

Anyway, let's get working on the fences. 30 HP is okay.

Ah! A hidden archer!

Play fair, you dingus!

Adel finishes, and promptly parks his horse on top of the fallen fence.

This never gets old, I swear.

All right, Sherlock. Prove to me that I was not mistaken in temporarily entrusting the Rossweisse to you.

Okay, good. Pretty sure that wasn't the Rossweisse, but still. Good.

More enemies! More! More!

I do believe it is about time.

Ballista animations in this game are so pretty.

Don't forget that Burroughs starts with 87 experience for some undiscernible reason. Thus...

Ahahahahahahahahah! Yes! Every other stat is more or less useless for Burroughs (by all means he should never be getting within reach of enemies with his ginormous range), so accuracy and power might as well be a perfect level for him. Nice! Good start, very good start.

...Except, I just checked the Serenes wiki, and much like crossbows, ballistae ignore the user's strength. So yeah. Even that is completely useless. Accuracy is all Burroughs wants.

It doesn't matter. Much like Marcel, I don't care about his stats as much as his level itself. Level 7 is when he learns Aim. Aim is really important for Burroughs - since he cannot attack after moving (barring glitches I won't be using), Aim more or less grants him a flat 30% accuracy improvement forever. So yeah. Let's get him there as soon as possible.

(Incidentally, maybe it goes without saying, but just in case, I'll say it: he has crossbow skill, but he cannot use crossbows, only ballistae)

Ahahahahahah... I love this guy.

Now, you. You must die. Pay the price for hiding from my eyes!

The rest of the army advances.

Fuck, new enemies coming from the barracks!

Sniper arrows + Rossweisse. Even Sherlock can hit things like this.

Still hoping to get him to level 15 before chapter 13. Preferably before chapter 12, too. You see, there is something I'd like him to do in chapter 12-2. Here's hoping he doesn't die before that...

More!

Mo-- Oaack!

Hahahahahahahaha! You cannot defeat the Adel!

You're up, Perceval. Let us see how you fare this day.

About as well as every other day, I see.

Fine then. Burroughs can do it.

Seriously, how can this moron with a rusty ballista hit more things than a mage with years of training under his belt?

Oh boy. A hidden archer with Overwatch. Thanks...

Yeah no.

By sheer luck, I was having Ruby move to the hex next to the archer.

Thanks to this unexpected bout of good look, Ruby gets to miss the guy. Uuuurrrrghhhhh...

That is better.

look at that mess.

What say you guys we give the Zweihander a shot? Surely there's no way he could miss twice! It'd be... unscientific.

Nice! That is quite wonderful.

Ahh, shit.

Hoaaah!

I think it's time for Adel to leave. He has seen everything.

Thus, he tosses a verutum at the guy and then runs back.

This proves I am an idiot. Percy...!

Ahahahahahahah! He has so much experience missing that he's been able to transform that into the ability to make enemies miss as well! I don't know if I've said it before, but I love this guy's cape games. Really, anyone who does cape flips is awesome in my book. It's why I love Lyon's animations so much. Best FE villain just for that. And, you know, the rest. I'm a Lyon stan, always been. Maybe that's why I liked Pelleas as much as I did...

Anyway, Perceval's cape movements cannot save him from the fate of having horrible screenshots of his attacks taken by me. Seriously, I swear every time I press F12 the thunder isn't even on screen.

'Notha kill for the bowman.

And thus... Derrick leads the charge! About time!

Fuck. You know, Derrick actually gets one of the few support bonuses that matter in this game. Whereas most of them are something dumb like 1 or 2% hit, Derrick gets a whole 10% hit, plus 2% crit. Unfortunately, I didn't field that person today.

That's my Percy, actually landing attacks!

Bleh. Well, he has another one.

Burroughs advances. I'm pretty sure he now can hit everyone above Derrick. Wonderful.

Now, these guys.

Give 'em a warm welcome, Ruby!

Eyy, an injury! His gear blows, but funds are never bad. Especially now that both Bernstool and Lynette are too dead to send us cash.

Not bad. I think we'll soon be able to storm the fort.

About another seven hours, I think... Any faster would be impossible. (14 turns)

I don't really give a damn what you think is impossible, soldier. Get it done in five! (10 turns)

Bwahahahahahahahah... That wasn't my addition, by the way. The game really does go back on its own hint two lines later. Lovely.

What good will these weapons do if you can't get them ready until after the base is lost, huh?

Now, since it's turn 5, I decided this'd be the perfect opportunity to savescum a spear level for Adel. It really isn't a Saint Rubenio LP without some rule breaking.

...except it wasn't necessary, because he got the thing on the first try! Ahhh, am I proud of ya, my boy! Please don't die.

He could leave with Canto, but he won't. Either the enemies smash their heads against the solid concrete wall that is Derrick, or they get denied by Vantadel. Either serves our purpose.

You fool! You have only made her more powerful!

Ah, fuck!

Well, it's fine... But he's starting to look worse for wear...

You! Crippled, now!

Fuck's sake...

What did I just say?

What!?

Hah hah! You cannot get me! I have perfected the secret techniques of the ancient kung-fu masters of yore! I am indestructible!

Fine, then. You can die, since you think you're so great.

Hmph... Archers. I don't like archers. They're coarse, and rough, and you know the rest.

Please die.

Motherfucker...

It is time, Sherlock. Show everybody what you are capable of! DOUBLE-SHOT!

Sher-- Sherlock!

No matter.

...Fuaaaahhh...

He couldn't double, but at least he dodged. It's something.

Clearly there is only one man I can count on. Or woman. I'm not entirely sure what's underneath all that armor. Sun God's Wrath already pulled a sneaky on me. I'm not about to fall for it twice!

See? Derrick is the best unit in games.

A bit further and he can level up.

Arturo is next. Please do things.

Well done.

...Fork.

Meh. Let's go. Marcel, get some experience.

Nice!

Thoroughly unsuccessful on both sides.

I want these archers dead. To that end, Burroughs will keep chancing his shaky hitrate against them.

Nice! But I still can't wait for you to get Aim.

That served a second purpose: the archer had the hidden skill that makes enemies gain the provoked status when they're attacked. As a result, this idiot is going to try to circle all around the fences and through the hills to get to Burroughs. Hah!

...Oh, you've got to be kidding me... How I hate when this happens! Random magic points are the worst. On the enemy, anyway.

That is better.

Well, leaving aside the fail from earlier, Sherlock is doing quite well today! It's just like I've been saying all game. Sherlock just needs good equipment.

He could move aside, but I mean, why.

Hmm... let's be very careful. I know Gorzevalus moves, but I'm not quite sure just how far. The flags are marking the ballista's range. We'd better watch out for that, too.

Let us only advance with our greatest tanks.

And by that I mean Derrick.

What...? What just happened?

Hmm... if my hex counting is correct, Adel should be able to throw a verutum and return to safety, no risks involved.

Adel, no...

Whatever. Get back. It's up to Derrick to tank.

Hah! You still believe yourselves capable of defeating me!? Have you not learned from your failures?! Fools! And now, I shall unleash--

Guaaaah! Dammit, I was completely useless...!

Can we please not repeat the embarrassment of the last fight, Derrick?

Thanks.

Meh.

It's fine.

Adel, c'mon! You cannot follow your friend into the light. Lumiere is on this side!

Ah, fuck... Here we go.

Well, I mean, 5 damage isn't really all that--

DERRICK!

I think I forgot to show it, but I bought a brand new physic orb from Yumil. Owen only had one use left.

Phew... Imagine losing Derrick. Maybe I should just make him an unofficial game over unit...

Hmph.

Oh, c'mon-- Derrick, please stop...!

Eh? What is happening?

...Wait... isn't this the one guy who was ordering the red guy around? The one who said "I don't care if there's noone trained to shoot the springalds, get them ready and we'll find someone"? Hah! Guess he didn't find anyone. Had to do it himself!

Also, he broke the thing. Sucker.

It really couldn't take more than two shots, huh...? Hurry up and get it repaired!

The ballista slides back into the barracks.

"We'll find someone to do it", eh? Good show, I must say. Clearly firing ballistae is exactly the same as firing crossbows, isn't it?

Keep talking to me like that, and I'll have you court-martialled! Now shut up and do your job!

Sigh...

Well, that's great. Now we just have to worry about Gorzevalus.

C'mon, Derrick, get a grip. Let's have a level for you!

Nice!

Speed for the meme! C'mon!

It's not speed, but I still like it.

Oh, c'mon. Marcel, really? You have, like, 97% shield rate! How do you miss it!?

This worked now.

And with that-- You piece of fuckin'... No! Perceval!

Sherlock it is, again. Jeigan the bastard!

I swear, Percy, if you miss this, I'm going to be mildly annoyed.

Good. Now get magic.

Eh, not bad! Maybe now he'll be one-shot by less things. And accuracy is never a bad gain for this guy.

Burroughs moves closer.

I should probably deal with this guy before he kills Burroughs on his first map, though.

That looks like it might work.

Fair enough.

Killing archers is fun. Let's give it another shot.

Or, you know, we can fail. That's fun too.

Another soldier down. I'm hoping I can give Marcel at least one level. That's my goal for the day, as far as he's concerned at least.

Let's stop for a moment, and take a look at the reason I can't just charge in.

See, I don't want to die. If this guy crits one of my units and then Gorzevalus decides to charge, I'll be upset. So let's handle this with care, shall we?

Not going too badly. I think I'll have Arthur lure Gorzevalus closer next turn. If he moves this far, that is.

No movement. All right.

Things have gotten awfully quiet, haven't they? I wonder what's going on out there...

Quiet?! With all the noise you're making with your tools? Kling, klang, klung-- it's insufferable!

Really? I like it very much.

You won't like what happens if you keep yapping away instead of working!

Okay, okay, no need to get all sultry...

Nice. Marcel cannot climb the hill. Excellent. Thank you, Kaga, for the love letter to armored units that is this game.

Anyway, this archer came out of the barracks as reinforcements. Let's give the new archer a warm welcome, shall we?

That's cold, man.

Hey now, don't take it out on Larentia. We'll give you your warm welcome at a later point in time.

Ruby has made it all the way up. That guy has a range 1 spear. She can soften him up now, and wait for the other dude to come after her.

Ohh, he's kinda angry now. If she could dodge this too, it'd be nice.

Love ya, girl.

Healing for Derrick. He's earned it, after failing twice to shield himself from ballista bolts.

Oh, please... Larentia's getting peppered now!

Oh God, the Euthyphro is yellow again... The only regular spear around is the slim spear Ruby has been carrying forever. The reason for this is that I'm dumb.

...Son of a gun...

Fine then. Let's chance it with the harpoon.

Good. I like it.

...Fucking hell-- Really, me? Did you really just do that?

Hmmm... Well, at any rate, it appears Gorzevalus isn't advancing yet.

Let's move cautiously. Staying out of the knight's range for now.

Damnit-- I can see one of them coming up the hill... I think they've managed to storm into the base!

I thought there were more than enough guards...

You-- What are you doing, wasting time talking!? What's taking you so long, anyway!? I said to have the springalds ready in 5 hours!

It's not been 5 hours yet!

...Grrr... Faster, faster!

Ahh, there we go. 29% chance could be worse. We can make this work.

See? Ruby is good. I totally didn't just train her to get her dad, only to lose him immediately.

To keep Perceval and Sherlock from having to waste time running around the fence, Adel and Derrick will make an opening for them.

Meanwhile, Arthur lures in the wrong enemy, but it's fine.

There we go.

Oh, shit! This one cavalier next to Gorzevalus does move!

For all the good it did h-- Ohhh, come on! Arturo, seriously! Why is everyone failing to use their shields today?

So Gorzevalus and the guy he spoke to in the cutscene (named "Associate") don't move, but the second cavalier (named "Guard" like the rest of the map's enemies) does move. Got it.

New turn time! First, since Arturo is dumb, he has to heal.

C'mon. Please. Arturo. I'm having you stand on the front for a reason. Right now you're taking the reason away from me.

Fine, go help him, Sherlock.

As well as Burroughs. Not that he's helping Arthur in particular, but... Well, the important thing is that he's helping someone. Go!

Ahhh, that's excellent! Absolutely magnificent.

...Pfhah! Really? Sure, great idea! Now Larentia can't get to you! Woo... Except there's a crippling flaw to your plan. More on that later.

No rush, though. Let's first get this spearman.

More hit.

Oh! Well, that wasn't what I was expecting, but sure. The less archers, the better.

...Oh my God he had a chance to die right there. If Sherlock hadn't hit the archer, the archer not only could've hit him back, he would also have been able to continue moving, most likely shooting him again.

Damnit, I moved Perceval already... Ehh, he probably woulda missed anyways.

Let's get Larentia closer to the other group. Because why not.

Ah! Sherlock under attack! Again!

And once again, he has succeeded. Seriously, quite impressed with his performance so far. Keep at it.

Ahhh, well that's so nice! Yeah, you park yourself next to Marcel. See how that works out for ya.

Seriously, these guys are so stupid. Hey, with the way I took these screenshots, it seems like Marcel has a seamless transition to his second hit. But nah, he returns to his idle position before his second swing.

Anyway, accuracy for Marcel.

We've taken the entrance. Not too much left till we win.

I still need to somehow get rid of that knight... I'm terrified of that 6% crit.

How does Sherlock do?

Pitifully, but... eh. Maybe if I put him in heal mode, he'll run away someplace else? Might give us some more room to maneuver. Once again, Sherlock! Prove your worth! DOUBLE-SHOT!

What-- Sherlock!? Not again...!

Okay, okay, no problem. Grant me the power of retrial! ONE-TWO!

...I think someone hasn't read the update title. You're not supposed to be acting like this today, Sherlock.

Oh my God, Arturo... Would it KILL YOU, to use your damn SHIELD!? Graaaaahh!

We're not making progress. Perceval, I know it is foolish to count on you, but let's try it.

You know, I haven't the faintest idea why I tried that. Pretty sure Percy would've died if he got hit twice by the archer, which he very much could have.

Yey, more accuracy. Only 13 points and he promotes. Probably at, like, chapter 13.

And now I have to use up a physic use. Thanks, Artie. Really nice.

I'm not sure who we're targeting here.

Whoever it was, they do not exist any longer.

Now... I know this looks terrible, but remember that Overwatch only triggers when the units enters the overwatcher's range. Since Ruby is already inside it, he can't pull it off.

Truly the brilliantest of plans, this guy's.

And now...

Fucking hell, Berwick Saga...

It's all or nothing with this guy. Either he doesn't get hit and then hits back with grace, or he fails completely. No middle ground.

Sigh... whatever. Adel. Do your thing.

If you could get through the shield and kill him, it'd be ideal, but if not, I'm fine with some basic Jeiganing.

I provided two options and you decided to go for option C: piss off the tactician.

Hurray. We're still here. And it's turn 10. That means we're getting ballistae, on top of everything else.

...Three... Two... One...!

AH-HAH! FIVE HOURS! THE TIME OF THEIR END IS AT HAND! COME FORTH, MY CAVALRY OF WOOD! LET US--

...Wait... What the hell!? Where's the wheels on this one?! And the one I used before is still split in half!

I told you, man! There's just no way I could get it ready in--

DAMNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT! WE'RE GOING TO DIE, YOU AND I! HURRY IT UP! HURRY! HURRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Okay, okay, no need to shout into my ear, goodness...

 

...Huh. Hah! I guess the fake-out was fake. Turn 14 it is, then. Good, that gives us a bit more leeway.

I hate you so much, Perceval.

Okay, attempt nº 2. Let's get that archer capture.

No? Okay, then. You asked for it! You're dying now.

Go away, Larentia. I am slightly upset at you.

Ahhhhhhhh, now you've done it! If you had just continued to bully Arturo, you may've gotten out of this one alive. But you just had to go after unassuming-looking Adel.

Hahahahahahahahah! Who cares about promotion? This hilarity is irreplaceable!

Hmm... Perhaps if I try another Overwatch with Sherlock, I could stop this guy...

Or, I could just stop him forever with Burroughs. That works too.

Anyone still have any doubts about this man's performance?

CKKK... OOOCKKK... CCCOCKKKKKKK...!!!

Now we have all the time in the world to kill this cavalier.

There we go. Trying to keep Sherlock out of Gorzevalus's range. I still don't trust him.

You had your chance to surrender via limb fracture. Now you'll be captured by the Reaper instead.

Now, about this knight... Perceval kills him. Allow me to point out, however, that he can miss. This means that he will miss. And if we do this, he'll get blasted away by the knight in retaliation. We must be wary...

To that end, let us use up our moves until the knight waits.

...he's not going to wait, is he.

Of course not. Baaah...

That was a complete waste of a turn, and now there's a ton of enemies. I'm glad I haven't touched the barracks yet... Sure, that's three enemies, but they're trapped back there, since the only ways out are through the small forest and Adel, or down the hill and Marcel.

Here's the idea: Derrick may be able to entirely tank the knight's normal damage, only taking the crit's extra. Then he shouldn't die. Shouldn't. I hope he doesn't. I pray he doesn't.

I really don't think that's going to work, pal.

Ah, shoot... that's no good.

This has nothing to do with anything, but I'd like to point this guy out. Is this some kind of punishment or something? Why is he there?

...G... Guysh...? H-Hello...? *hic* What'sh going on...? Shounds like a... b-big fight... awww, my h-head... Lasht time I... drink on duty... Ain't worth the cell time...

There's a chance that this might work. I don't want Burroughs to end the map at 99 EXP, so it'd be great if this could work out.

Oooohhh, c'mon...! If you keep doing stuff like this, everyone will know you were bullshitting them when you were bragging about how you're some kind of big-shot sharpshooter, specially sought out by Reese! Don't you want to preserve your image?

Okay, then. It can't be helped: Adel must go on the offensive.

Quite successfully, too! Proud of ya, man.

Sherlock finishes.

Not another one

Oh, God, here we go... It has started...!

Please don't crit him... he's too important to die here...! Not that he'd die if you crit him, but still! Please...!

Oh, phew...

Yes! Derrick is winner!

Percy time.

Ahhh, it definitely was Percy time, yes! Yes!

Fuck me, what now...

Fuck it-- we're advancing right now. Those barracks need to go down or I'm getting ballistae spawned on top of my army.

ArthuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRR!!

Good dodge.

Let's start to work on the barracks, then. Breaking them would be nice.

It's only faintly visible in this screenshot, but there's smoke on top of the barrack now. Cool.

You failed, Perceval. Now let a real mage show you how it's done.

But first, he'll cast a thunderbolt on his pee-pee. Okay, sure, different strokes for different folks, and all that.

There we go! See, Perceval? See that thing Owen just did? It's called "not missing". You should try it, it's really fun.

Lookin' good!

It's turn 13. First things first, let's make sure Gorzevalus doesn't get any funny ideas. Derrick, block the way forth!

What...? Still not moving? But I was pretty sure... Ah, whatever. We'll see.

Attempt nº 2, Arturo. Again.

Glad I can always count on you to succeed on the second try.

He can reach Owen, but if you notice, he's glowing red, so he'll go after Artie instead.

Sherlock sets up an Overwatch, because might as well.

I'd like to point out that Burroughs cannot cross the downed fence, even with Hurry. He's stuck down there, but that is all right. He's done a good job. I'll just try to get him one more kill, because ending the map at 99 is too cruel, and then he may rest easy.

There we go, just like that.

More accuracy?

Haha yes! Three cheers for the ballistician!

While moving back to allow Sherlock to shoot the last soldier, Adel whacks this barrack.

All according to plan.

Nice, that's great too. Only 5 more points to 30. Really, it's more difficult to get this guy to level 15 than it is to get him to his skill threshold.

Ruby--

No! You spend too much time hanging out with Arthur.

At least there's that.

Overworld magic is also really pretty in this game.

And that's our first barrack downed! 250D is not great, but there are far juicier items hidden about the place, so let's not give up.

Oh, please... Arthur, can you stop making a mockery of yourself already?

You do it, Sherlock.

No, seriously, what is happening today? Why is Sherlock being the reliable one in this map?

A shame he didn't get strength. But it's all right, I suppose. It's not like he's ever going to catch up to Sylvis. Not in stats, anyway. He has other perks.

Ah, finally! For some unfathomable reason, Gorzevalus has a unique battle theme. I mean, we've heard it before, but this is the first time it shows up as a battle theme. Gorzevalus shares it with... plot-critical lategame bosses. Not only that - plot-critical lategame bosses when confronted by specific units. Otherwise they just have Fight to the Death. I'm pretty sure Gorzevalus is the only enemy in the entire game that always uses this theme. So he's entirely unique in that aspect.

I can only assume Kaga knew he'd become a meme before he even released the game.

You sure, Gorzevalus? You a hundred percent sure?

Yeah, good luck getting through that. 13 years have passed, but Derrick's epicness is timeless!

S'ppose I should talk about this guy now.

Gorzevalus has a full knight kit that I'd like to capture him for. He also begins to move at some point, unless you set up a Derrickade to impede his advance. Undisplayed is his secret skill, Translate, which allows me to play Berwick Saga. This makes him the top tier unit of all games. Beyond that, though, he's a pretty standard boss.

Incidentally, the associate has Vantage. The one cavalier that charged Arthur also had Vantage, but since Adel Vantaged him back, we never got to see it.

Vantage this, motherfucker!

Hahahahahah...!

Well, that's one less thing to worry about. You know what I should probably worry about, though? It's turn 14.

Bah, we'll worry about that when it becomes a problem. For now, Owen gives back the thunder orb. Percy might as well keep lightning, since he can now use it.

Associate heals. Sure, whatever rocks your boat.

Can I count on you, Perceval?

Good.

More work on the barracks.

...Haaaah...!

Phew... Injured, too? It seems today is the day of all injuries, no cripplings.

Oh God... Oh Raze... Oh my...! BAAAAAAAHH! MOVE YOUR ASS, OR YOU'LL BE DEAD BEFORE THE WHOLE PLACE CRUMBLES DOWN ON US!

I'm... trying...! Just gotta... screw this wheel tight, and...!

Okay, quick. Let's try to down these barracks before they can--

That'll be plenty! All right... Prepare yourselves, you Berwick League dogs!

Fuck.

Fuck!

FUCK!

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! PERCEVAL!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH, NOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

...This guy takes himself way too seriously...

All right, so here's the deal: the enemy only has one move. Owen can take one ballista bolt OR one crossbow bolt. Then we can heal him. Perceval dies to the ballista, so he flees for his life.

Hwahahahahahahah! Look at them running for their lives! What a sight to behold! Ahh, it was worth the wait after all!

On his way out of harm's way, Perceval lightnings a fellow.

This happens again.

The crossbowman. Quick, get the crossbowman.

You can't be serious-- I can't afford this!

Oh, he's angry. Good, that works. But I still have to take down the ballista before it crushes us... Ohh, man...! Okay, get outta here, Larentia.

Yes! Run! Keep runnning! I HAVE SO MUCH POWER! MWAHAHAH, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Sherlock! You're our last hope...!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ohh, phew... Good. Good. We're alive. Oh, thank goodness...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-- NO, WHAT?! MY BALLISTA!

That was quite a bit of experience, from killing an immobile, defenseless target.

What!? No, this wasn't supposed to go like this! Quick, another one! Give me the other springald!

"As long as it shoots, I don't care", he said... "We'll find someone to do it", he said...

Associate tries to shank Derrick. He is... semi-successful.

...Hah! oh, I can't believe I didn't realize! I can just protect Owen with Marcel. Yeah, that's a great idea--

...Paaaahhhh...!?

Shoot, no! The archer!

It was at this point that I panicked and completely fogot that the guy was angry at Larentia.

Oh yeah, Guard. Such a useful waste of Marcel's turn.

Oh man.

Hah! You were mistaken in confronting this guy, now that he's got an orb with high accuracy!

Another one? How many more of these, in this one map!?

The crossbowman and Arturo fight, with varying degrees of success.

Oh God. Okay, I better shield Percy with Adel...

Bad idea. Bad fuckin' idea! Dammit, I regretted this as soon as I pressed A!

...A? No, that's not right... what's the confirm button for this game, again? Since I've not played many PS games, I'm not familiar with their button distribution. As far as I'm concerned, it's X to confirm and Z to go back. Tab to go fast.

Oh yeah, a thousand dees.

Well, was it worth it, Ruben? Was it? Urgh...

That's more like it.

Derrick tosses a francisca at Associate. Fails.

Guard tries what so many others before him have. Fails.

NOAAAHHH! ANOTHER BALLISTA!? HOW MANY MORE DO THEY HAVE?!

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAH! I'M BACK! AHAH--

OH, C'MON! NOT THIS BALLISTA TOO! C'MON, MAN!

All right, then. I'll spare the ballista.

BWAAAAAAGH! Aa... uugh... N-No...

Oh, goodness... Sir!

Y-You...

...!

...Tell my wife... My sweet, dear... Mary... I... with all my heart, I... love her... Urk...!

Wait-- What's your wife's full name!? Where're you from?! What's she look like!? Tell me more! I can't find her like this...!

......

Damnit all! No! No! Sir, wake up...! Sir...!

...hoo... Goodness, Sherlock. That's twice you've saved everyone's hides today. You're on fire today! On fire, I tell you!

D vs G: the 2020 remake.

Now, for this crossbowguy. He's still angry at Arthur, but I want him out of my hair soon as possible.

Just like so.

Okay-- now I think that's Burroughs's last contribution to the map. Finishing off Adel's opponent.

Not bad! A couple more kills and he'll gain Aim.

Derrick continues to singlehandedly fend off the boss and his pal.

Now-- Please, kill the barracks before they can shit out even more ballistae.

Oh, God, now they're trying to bring the building down on my head...! No! H-Hold on! I'm here! D-Don't do this! I'm just an engineer! I don't know how to fight, I'm unarmed! Please, spare me...!

C'MOOOOOOOOOOOOON! STOP IT!

FUCK OFF, ARTHUR, SERIOUSLY. WORST UNIT 0/10.

I intended to have Owen nuke one of the barracks with hellfire, but that is no longer possible, because Arthur is the most incompetent member of my army.

Gotta heal Derrick. I don't want any nasty surprises. His shielding rate is not 100%, and Gorzevalus is quite powerful.

Don't stop. Keep destroying those barracks!

A horse! There was a horse in the building!

I will take it.

He doesn't pretend to be a plane in the overworld. What a shame...

...Well? What's in the barracks? Ahh, I forgot to screenshot it. Well, by all probability it was just something like a silver coin.

Fuck, more archers on top of us. No ballistae, though... that's nice.

Let's take care of this one swiftly.

That's not-- noo, Marcel... You won't get your level like this!

Oh, man. he's coming at Derrick with his knight sword now!

Hoah!

Arthur, please don't force me to employ Sherlock again.

Nice. Perfect shot of his experience, too.

Arthur killed the injured archer with Overwatch. The one Marcel softened up is instead finished off by Adel.

Oh, please... What's with everyone today!?

That's more like the Derrick I know.

I think it's about time you went to sleep. You've wasted Derrick's time long enough.

Seriously impressed by Sherlock today. I mean, it's mostly his equipment being good, but still...

Level, be good! I command it!

YES! YES! STRENGTH! AHAHAHAHAHAH, YES! TODAY IS THE DAY THAT HORSEMEN DO NOT PISS ME OFF!

Larentia Adepts a barrack to near destruction.

Meanwhile, Ruby and Percy bring another one to full destruction!

This is okay.

No, seriously. You are an embarrassment to the Sinon Knights, Arthur. And to think, we granted you the title of Paladin... Paladunce, more like!

More axes.

Cool, bolts for Burroughs! It's only 8, not a full pack. Still, every little bit helps!

Kuuuuuhhh! See, this is what I was worried about...

N-No, please! H-Have mercy, I'm begging you! I-I have a wife and child, too! I cannot fight, I'm no threat to you! Please...!

...All right. I'll let you out before I bring this cheap shack down.

Phew... Oh, thank you, thank you!

Let me just... draw my arrow back-- Oh, whoops!

Sherlock downs the second ballista-spawning barrack. Revenge!

...A-A-Aaaaahhh! NO! MOMMYYYYYYYYYY--!

...?

Anyway, if you reeeeeeeeally squint your eyes, you might see that his bow level increased to 27.

......

......

...Okay, you can go now.

...U-Uhh... u-uhh... N-Never again... T-This isn't worth the peanuts I get paid...! I-I'm getting a new pair of pants, and then I'm quitting the army!

Ah, now it went down. That took long enough.

Owen will have to leave soon. First, however, he must heal up Derrick.

Cool!

About time you stopped fucking about.

Another barrack down. Only one left. Well, and the supply tents near Ruby.

Aww shiet!

It's this, to be precise. Sure, 3 strikes, but 1 might, 20% hitrate, F durability... yeah, this thing is no chu-ko-nu. And since Sylvis already has a better chu-ko-nu, we can safely hand this over to our favorite nerdy billionaire.

Underneath these cloth awnings, we find materials. Here is a gold dust.

Oh boy. I wonder how that's gonna go down.

You mean, the same as always? No...

Here's a fun little feature. We can set the units to standby.

And there we go, now the game won't waste my time pulling the cursor down to Burroughs.

I'll have Marcel deal with this guy and the trapped axeman. That way he can level up at last. Damn, he's gaining experience really slowly now.

I don't understand, why did you use your knight sword for no reason once, only to then go back to throwing?

Anyway.

This is a really long update, isn't it?

It's about time to confront Gorzevalus. First, a flourishing.

It did not work, because Arturo is determined to make me mad at him today.

Oh, shit!

That's better. Gotta love when enemies get injured when they die.

Zerika steel here. I can't remember what this thing makes. We'll find out next update, maybe.

And with that, we enter turn 20! Owen leaves, but with only two enemies left on the map, he shouldn't be needed, anyway.

No more pilum? Good.

Now, Perceval with lightning will be the best option to cripple Gorzevalus if we manage to injure him. If we don't, however... meh. We'll see, then.

You're free!

Mmh... mmngah... amh? Ah, I wash wondering where everyone had gone... Eeeyyyy, wait a minute... *hic* ye're not... ye're not one of the guysh... Who're...?

...! ENEMY RAID! DEFENSIVE MANEUVERS! YOU'LL NEVER GET PAST ME, BERWICK BASTARDS! BERSTERDS! Hah, whaddaya think 'bout that one? I came up with it aaaaaaaall by myself! Get it, bersterds? Since you're from the Berwick league, bastards, berwick... get it? Eh? Eh?

Please fight me already.

That's the last time you do that.

...Probably.

Now, here's the deal. Larentia will windsweep the guy with the harpoon. I have little hope of being able to injure him this way, but it's worth a try.

Good news: got through the shield. Bad news: no injury.

Guess we'll just... keep this up for a while.

Replace Derrick with this dumbass, maybe?

AAAAACK! C'mon, it wasn't that bad...!

Yes, it was.

O-Okay, I guess it... really was a bad pun... So... rry...

Cool, 2 levels till movement.

I spent a good while tanking the guy while trying to injure him (I'll spare you the details, this is a long enough update as it is), but to no avail. I'm afraid the guy just refused.

This is my last hope: a lucky crippling with lightning.

Alas...

'Twas not to be. It is a difficult choice to make, but... I must kill Aethin.

Truly the saddest of Camuses. Who will translate Holy Sword of Silvanister now? Not that I'd demand it of Aethin anyway, he deserves to rest after Berwick.

Ahahahahahah... Jokes aside, I like his death quote. To tell you the truth, Gorzy, you put up a good fight, and your battle plan was pretty good. We were just superior.

Halfway to level 12. Not bad. Maybe by next chapter, he'll be able to nab that promotion. Unless he dies. That's always a possibility under my command.

Now, I had the most hilarious idea: Adel will destroy some fences. They don't grant experience, but as we've seen, they do grant skill points. I'm hoping to get a spear point or three out of this.

While Adel does that, I'll visit the two houses.

I want to protect this forest, but I'm too powerless to help... At the very least, take this guy with you to fight in my stead.

Hwahahahahahahah! This is the kind of insane idea only Kaga could come up with. This axe disappears after this map (guess we just gave it back), and it has 40 might. 40. Of course, with 10% hit, this is completely useless against people. Fairly certain this is intended to be used against the buildings.

Unfortunately, the house is so out of the way, that even if you send Larentia to get it the first turn, it'll arrive a bit too late to do much. Still, appreciate the thought.

 

But now... I can't stand seeing it being used for warfare... Please, take back our precious home for us...

Free vulnerary! I'll take it.

Just like last time, 30 spear skill would've been a pipe dream - but I did manage to get him to 22, at least. If we can keep this pace up... Hm. Maybe. The dream may not be dead yet.

To finish, Derrick seizes. Of course he does, he's the leader! I like how derelict the camp ended up looking like after Adel was done with it. Looks like a damn hurricane came through!

All right, that's what you call a success! Everything went well. Well, except the end. We were unable to capture Aethin. A shame. But still, beyond that! Nobody died! After three maps in a row with casualties, it's so nice to finally be able to leave a map without anger in my heart. Ahhh, that feels good. It feels great, goddamnit! Yes! Woooooohoooooo! I am winner! Anyway. Next time, we go back to Corona with the good news. See you then, and now, I am going to say the F-word: Farewell!

 

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban
                        Czene
                        Clifford
                        Elbert
                        Leon

                        Faye x 3

* Unavailable

Capture count: 2 (Daoud, Elbert)

Cripple count: 1 (Perceval)

Reset count: 6 (Reese: 1, Ward: 3, Abus: 2)

 

Current perfect streak: -218 maps

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

* Unless they're Faye.

[Punished Dayni]

Spoiler

18 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Fair enough, I suppose.

  It is also true that 3H overuses Defeat boss, encouraging the attempts to find these starts.

18 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh. Call me a dummy, then.

Don't worry about it.

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sheesh... I do hope you are able to continue.

Funny reading this after you commenting on my update swearing about Reunion at Dawn.

12 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes. Very much, yes. Do you know the amount of people who claimed they'd keep waiting for a third Thracia translation (or learn Japanese) because they changed Safy to Safiya and Sleuf to Schroff? Too many.

Heck, I think it was barely a couple weeks ago that some guy went to the Lil' Manster thread and started bitching all condescendingly about how the translations aren't using the CyL names. Oh no. They're using Callion instead of Corpse. What a nightmare.

Meanwhile, the patch they're apparently more willing to take is the reason we meme about Bandit Kempf.

12 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, I didn't say that. At the end of the day, it's their games, and if they were to translate/remake the games, they'd have every right to change Vergil's name to Belf, even if I hate it. But from things like Carrion and the Nimue and Murdoch mishaps, you can clearly tell that they don't put too much effort into the CyL list. Which is fine, I mean, its sole purpose is for people to click on the faces so they can lose to Camilla and Three Houses characters. Why spend so much time pondering over the best way to translate one of 700~ names?

For this reason, I believe that to claim that fanslations that deviate from this list in any way are completely wrong and not worth using is just plain dumb. Sure, it's the official list of names from IntSys, but at the same time it's such a blatantly obvious quick-fix that I don't think it should be instantly accepted as the absolute truth. If the translator does some research into the original name, and realizes that there's a better translation, go for it. If the translation looks like shit and you want to slightly change it into something that actually sounds like a name, go for it. That's what I think.

To be fair, a large percentage of those names won't ever need to be changed and the proportion that might get changed are going to depend on how localisation is handled. They also can't lose to Camilla since she already won one.

I know I don't feel the Belf anger, but still.

12 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, you're completely right here. I'll admit, the "IntSys has no say in anything because Kaga left" part was probably going too far, especially considering that IntSys themselves usually aren't in charge of the translations. I take that part back. Sorry.

Aren't directly for sure. That is something that isn't as fixed any more with increasing online interaction, but the timezones in particular act as a deterrent for now.

It will be fascinating to see what happens with any remakes in future, because IS seem to have tried to keep the names consistent across releases with 3H and I wonder what the result would be especially for Judgral titles.

13 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I wouldn't know, I haven't watched the movie. Because I'm awful like that.

ReesexWard is not the ship I'd expect is what I'm meaning.

As for Groundhog Day, it's a grand enough comedy.

14 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, now... Aren't we jumping to conclusions a bit much?

Maybe.

I still stand by my theory.

15 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...No. Not at all, in fact. How did you draw that conclusion?

Bornia's the only land border, correct?

There wasn't any others as far as I remembered.

16 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I still don't think anything will ever top the fact that Peppy Hare was voiced by the TF2 soldier. Do you have any idea the amount of hours I played Star Fox 64 on my Wii U, and yet I had no idea until the man died?

Do a barrel roll has a very different context in TF2.

I'd forgotten that man had died.

19 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Le map full view. I like this one. See all those barriers? They're breakable. The whole shtick of this map is that we're supposed to open up some paths for us, without leaving the enemy too many openings. The object is to seize the fort on the upper right corner, but we'll also want to destroy the barracks. Not only do they spawn reinforcements, they also contain items.

I feel like it's Age of Empires with all these palisades.

As for the items, so like that one RD map but you don't have to enter before destroying them to get the item?

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let's go. Today's Imperial commander is Gorzevalus, who is a meme in Japan. Aethin explained the reason to me: Gorzevalus's japanese name is ゴーゼワロス.

ゴーゼ looks like an emoji, as you can plainly see, and ワロス is a slang for laughing. Thus, people found him very risible indeed, leading to stuff like this video's existence (notice the date), or this thing that Aethin sent to me:

Alright, I guess that meme doesn't work because I don't get Japanese all that well.

That 2007 video's amazingly pixely.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Now that is a batter Tales title than Phantasia.

21 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

We either defend this base now, or we die trying! You got that?!

He's pretty intense.

Really not the laugh riot his name should be.

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ballista animations in this game are so pretty.

Did he set the bolt the first time he pulled, or did he have to redo it to fire?

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahahahah! Yes! Every other stat is more or less useless for Burroughs (by all means he should never be getting within reach of enemies with his ginormous range), so accuracy and power might as well be a perfect level for him. Nice! Good start, very good start.

...Except, I just checked the Serenes wiki, and much like crossbows, ballistae ignore the user's strength. So yeah. Even that is completely useless. Accuracy is all Burroughs wants.

It doesn't matter. Much like Marcel, I don't care about his stats as much as his level itself. Level 7 is when he learns Aim. Aim is really important for Burroughs - since he cannot attack after moving (barring glitches I won't be using), Aim more or less grants him a flat 30% accuracy improvement forever. So yeah. Let's get him there as soon as possible.

(Incidentally, maybe it goes without saying, but just in case, I'll say it: he has crossbow skill, but he cannot use crossbows, only ballistae)

So he literally only cares about two stats.

Alright.

25 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Anyway, Perceval's cape movements cannot save him from the fate of having horrible screenshots of his attacks taken by me. Seriously, I swear every time I press F12 the thunder isn't even on screen.

I mean, it is lightning, you shouldn't really find it that easy to catch on a picture.

25 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Fuck. You know, Derrick actually gets one of the few support bonuses that matter in this game. Whereas most of them are something dumb like 1 or 2% hit, Derrick gets a whole 10% hit, plus 2% crit. Unfortunately, I didn't field that person today.

Really making my theory add up with this line.

28 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

About another seven hours, I think... Any faster would be impossible. (14 turns)

I don't really give a damn what you think is impossible, soldier. Get it done in five! (10 turns)

Bwahahahahahahahah... That wasn't my addition, by the way. The game really does go back on its own hint two lines later. Lovely.

Sure, why not be clear about that?

The contradiction could confuse people.

35 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Wait... isn't this the one guy who was ordering the red guy around? The one who said "I don't care if there's noone trained to shoot the springalds, get them ready and we'll find someone"? Hah! Guess he didn't find anyone. Had to do it himself!

Also, he broke the thing. Sucker.

It really couldn't take more than two shots, huh...? Hurry up and get it repaired!

That or he thinks he's a crackshot.

Considering Derrick didn't raise his shield he might have been accurate.

36 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's not speed, but I still like it.

Derrick actually getting strength.

That's some surprise to be sure.

40 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You won't like what happens if you keep yapping away instead of working!

Okay, okay, no need to get all sultry...

Wait, is the engineer into people barking orders at him?

I shouldn't judge, but he should probably get help for that.

48 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Seriously, these guys are so stupid. Hey, with the way I took these screenshots, it seems like Marcel has a seamless transition to his second hit. But nah, he returns to his idle position before his second swing.

A shame that there was no doubling pose.

Though his idle pose is nice and all, so maybe they decided that was enough of a reason.

51 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

AH-HAH! FIVE HOURS! THE TIME OF THEIR END IS AT HAND! COME FORTH, MY CAVALRY OF WOOD! LET US--

...Wait... What the hell!? Where's the wheels on this one?! And the one I used before is still split in half!

I told you, man! There's just no way I could get it ready in--

DAMNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT! WE'RE GOING TO DIE, YOU AND I! HURRY IT UP! HURRY! HURRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Okay, okay, no need to shout into my ear, goodness...

 

...Huh. Hah! I guess the fake-out was fake. Turn 14 it is, then. Good, that gives us a bit more leeway.

Did you lie about when the reinforcements would come, Kaga?

Oh you!

53 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This has nothing to do with anything, but I'd like to point this guy out. Is this some kind of punishment or something? Why is he there?

...G... Guysh...? H-Hello...? *hic* What'sh going on...? Shounds like a... b-big fight... awww, my h-head... Lasht time I... drink on duty... Ain't worth the cell time...

As a surprise?

I assume he got stuck there, either because of stupidity or because he's in the drunk tank.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That'll be plenty! All right... Prepare yourselves, you Berwick League dogs!

Fuck.

That's pretty astute of the gunner if he understands the meta.

Not that it matters to you, but still.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bad idea. Bad fuckin' idea! Dammit, I regretted this as soon as I pressed A!

...A? No, that's not right... what's the confirm button for this game, again? Since I've not played many PS games, I'm not familiar with their button distribution. As far as I'm concerned, it's X to confirm and Z to go back. Tab to go fast.

Considering it's Japanese, the confirm button's probably circle, x is to go back and I know there's a button for square in combat for Berwick.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Derrick tosses a francisca at Associate. Fails.

This second image is amazing to me. It's perfectly straight.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...hoo... Goodness, Sherlock. That's twice you've saved everyone's hides today. You're on fire today! On fire, I tell you!

Sherlock's a surprisingly helpful unit this time around.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I will take it.

Pocketing the horse shouldn't be possible.

But here we are.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

YES! YES! STRENGTH! AHAHAHAHAHAH, YES! TODAY IS THE DAY THAT HORSEMEN DO NOT PISS ME OFF!

He realised Sylvis could possibly get more strength.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let me just... draw my arrow back-- Oh, whoops!

Sherlock downs the second ballista-spawning barrack. Revenge!

...A-A-Aaaaahhh! NO! MOMMYYYYYYYYYY--!

Poor engineer-

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...U-Uhh... u-uhh... N-Never again... T-This isn't worth the peanuts I get paid...! I-I'm getting a new pair of pants, and then I'm quitting the army!

Ah, now it went down. That took long enough.

Okay, never mind.

I can't think of an FE that would handle a falling asset like that.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And there we go, now the game won't waste my time pulling the cursor down to Burroughs.

Burroughs needed another chance!

Why leave him there?

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You're free!

Mmh... mmngah... amh? Ah, I wash wondering where everyone had gone... Eeeyyyy, wait a minute... *hic* ye're not... ye're not one of the guysh... Who're...?

...! ENEMY RAID! DEFENSIVE MANEUVERS! YOU'LL NEVER GET PAST ME, BERWICK BASTARDS! BERSTERDS! Hah, whaddaya think 'bout that one? I came up with it aaaaaaaall by myself! Get it, bersterds? Since you're from the Berwick league, bastards, berwick... get it? Eh? Eh?

Please fight me already.

Berstards would have been better 2/10.

Right! I'll do you for that!

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... Jokes aside, I like his death quote. To tell you the truth, Gorzy, you put up a good fight, and your battle plan was pretty good. We were just superior.

Fair is fair, he was a tough nut.

Shame he faced some tougher nuts this time.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahahahah! This is the kind of insane idea only Kaga could come up with. This axe disappears after this map (guess we just gave it back), and it has 40 might. 40. Of course, with 10% hit, this is completely useless against people. Fairly certain this is intended to be used against the buildings.

Unfortunately, the house is so out of the way, that even if you send Larentia to get it the first turn, it'll arrive a bit too late to do much. Still, appreciate the thought.

That is a meme weapon.

Imagine if you could keep it, but it had F durability. That'd be a lot of fun to see imo.

So, the course induction started and there's a ton of online module stuff to do. Yay.

Also, good day to post the next part.

[BrightBow]

 

Spoiler

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I feel there's a reference here. Is this the Yoshiwhatever Kira fellow again? Nah, this doesn't sound like anime dialogue... It's probably from a movie. But I've googled multiple parts that seem quotable and I can't find anything... Please explain the joke to me.

It is indeed good old Yoshiwhatever Kira.

Spoiler

 

 

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eerrrgh... not gonna lie, "spread his deadly load" doesn't exactly evoke the image of a terrifying virus. It is still a rather terrifying image, though.

Yeah, on second thought that phrasing does kinda make it sound more like that one time when Spiderman killed Mary Jane with his radioactive sperm.
 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Huh. Hah! I guess the fake-out was fake. Turn 14 it is, then. Good, that gives us a bit more leeway.

Fake-out? 10 turns was referring to the turns needed from when the dialog occurred. I don't know which turn that dialog occurs, but I know that in your case you already had Derrick inside the breach. So it has to have been several turns in.

 

 

[Hanes]

Spoiler

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, from what I've gathered, the US is kinda falling apart in this pandemic. My heart goes out to you and to all other US readers. Not that Spain is much better off, but... well, not quite the disaster you guys face.

Well you guys panicked like a few months ago but you acted decisively and it stopped spreading as much, that at least is commendable. I guess you have the EU around to judge your country and they aren't an ocean away like the US with Nato, but I'll still commend your culture for not being THAT selfish.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's another programming course. But... well, there's been a bit of a change of plans.

Oof...

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Grrr... I'll have you know, I find Valtome to be the most offensive, disgusting, ridiculous character in all of Tellius. So if you wanted to get me ranting...!

You have not succeeded. That's really all I have to say about him.

Bwahahaha hehehe... guess it's not Ranting Roo-(trash)bin time yet. Keeheehee 

no offense

Quote

Yes, I do believe bombing Mexico would be a fairly adequate course of action.

An eye for an eye...

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahh, it happens to you too!

Well when lines can be used in other conversations as well, like when I say "I see" then yeah I can't quite figure it out can I?

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, I don't deny that. I meant "awful" in a good way. Probably should've made it more clear. I forgot that people can't read my mind for a second.

Well eh, I didn't mind it too much, wasn't being serious either. Anyways reading minds is uncool and a privacy violation, you know what would be cool? Being able to send to someone else the same ideas you have without having to say them out loud, like have our neuro-electrical mind process just pass to someone else in the combination that will make them understand what I mean, or want to do, etc.

Gowther in the Seven Deadly Sins Anime actually does this in the final episode of Season 1, sends everyone a brain shock so they all get in on the plan to defeat the big bad guy of that arc, it's really cool

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Saint Rubenio DESTROYS Boi who uses bad unit with FACTS and LOGIC

Wrong! Haven't used Nino in ages, like I said somewhere after in my last update, now I'm known as Hanes around places and have a Heath profile picture.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

M Y   W I F E   I S   A   D O C T O R

Did he ever say that? Lol.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahaha, don't worry, I'm just messing with ya. I'll put it in the list. So far it's a list with games in it. The 25 it'll have one new game. Maybe. See if you can guess which one it is.

I do not keep up to date with release dates so yeah idk. Also you had me confused there for a bit about what you meant by 25. Small tip: next time say The 25th or maybe even "On the 25th" so it's clear it's a date.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Play Giten Megami Tensei. Very pleasant game, from what I've heard.

Hehe... yeaaaaah...

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah. One of these days I really should share my sheet of sprites. They're nothing too amazing, but I'm rather proud of a few of them.

Being proud is alright, that would be cool. I remeber you shared your BWS portrait collection, but I haven't searched for it since it was on new topics.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahahaha, you sound like a regular person with a cold!

Yeah I'm not too happy of my voice... I'm 16! Not 12... 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait... "como hacer tu fnaf fanmade"? Ahahahahahahah! That's not something I was expecting to see there. No offense or anything, it's just... really not what I was expecting.

Dude I legit unlisted every video I had before, I don't get why that one is still there. Guess I'll go and double-check if it is unlisted, but I legit clicked on a box to unlist ALL my vids. I thought maybe it would show as a placeholder until I put a new video... anyways I have enough skill to program in Scratch if I want to, I'm just lazy as balls.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh my God and you used a note to type the instructions on camera... All that video was missing is this.

Yeah... wait it's not that song is it? *clicks on it* OMG you and I watched the same video on old youtube tutorials didn't you? Bwa- hehehehe!

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

They would've showed up later, according to the experts. In fact, now that I think about it, one time I killed the courier and the reinforcements showed up on top of Reese while he made his way to the spy.

Duly Noted. Also that's a funny thing for them to stand on Reese... before getting demolished lel.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

If it was 100,000 it'd be great. Unfortunately, Berwick Saga is a well designed game.

...Most of the time.

Yeah... damn it Adel!

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Grounded? Whatever did you do? Were you caught playing Fiya Emburem when you should've been studying?

I pissed off my dad, recently I've been more rebellious than before because I've released my frustrations on him. I don't like him one bit. Also everytime he grounds me he brings Fire Emblem up and tells me to stop acting like a know-it-all because I play the game but like... when the fuck did I say I think I'm smart because of it? Oh well this isn't the place to bring in my familial problems.

On the topic of Fire Emblem, I played some Souls of the Forest Reverse Lunatic and damn! I finally got every treasure on that defense map (Chapter 6) it was such an experience wow, but I'm definitely proud of myself! Even if some treasures are a bigger pain than what it's worth (like a Secret Book) it still gives me bragging rights.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You can have Alm equip a bow? What...? How!?

Also, yeah, I missed the post, sorry. Let me check out the rankings...

Well, damn! You've played far more games than I have, lol.

Yeah well played means like maybe halfway, maybe just one or two chapters. I've touched them in other words.

Yeah! Once you promote Alm, he equips a bow! That's why you do Celica's maps first, it gets him his promotion once Celica goes to speak to the old sage in Sage's Hamlet, then Alm has to go to a Shrine and gets a big fat promotion bonus (which makes him relevant even on hard if he's base level holy fuck) which also allows him to use bows... give him a killer bow, plus have someone else killer bow too and... yeah Hunter's volley is how you trivialize Nuibaba's abode.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hmmm... TRS Runan was like 16, Vestaria Zade may've even been 15 if I recall correctly, Alm and Marth were definitely minors, heck Seliph even looks like a girl that's how young he is...

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe book 2 Marth made it to 18. Maybe. Beyond that, though, yeah. Sigurd.

Alright, though Seliph has ponytails I guess is what makes him look girly, on the other hand it means he's cute but still tall and epic. That's a combination... hehe I think I like it.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Also, Ward. I know he doesn't look like a Kaga lord, but he's very much a Kaga lord. I mean, he game overs you if he dies!

Ward game overs? That's really cool I guess, or rather Kaga didn't want to write a story without Ward so he just made it impossible to kill him.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm pretty sure this is a thing of the past. Back when people were more formal, and it was more important to show your parents proper respect. Also back when father could beat son without repercussion, and mother was a maid without pay.

...I... don't think those were such good ol' times.

I guess that makes more sense.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You are EVIL! You're more of a schemer than Claude! You actually make schemes, for one thing.

Wow what a high bar. I made a Scheme and am schemier than Claude. Truly amazing. Hehe

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Back then I named him after his profession. I hadn't yet come up with the idea to characterize him as a reluctant loan shark with a heart of gold. If I could I'd probably change more than a couple names at this point.

That's a cool detail.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! It's fine, don't worry about it. As long as you're smart enough to realize Volcens is a dumbass...

:thinking: Yeah I guess.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Inflation. Denariis are worth shit these days. Rumors say it's because King Volcens had the brilliant idea to print money. He forgot that denariis are coins.

Hahahahaha! Jajajajaa! Ok that's funny

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Fuck him, seriously.

Hehehehehehe 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't think it's anything to worry about, as long as I am able to fulfill my duty to my liege and my promise to my father.

Spoken like... like you, Reese. Spoken like you.

I WOULD STILL TREAD LIGHTLY IF I WERE YOU, WORM

Aaaack!

Reesemomento.png

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Arthur be like "what I said was true... from a certain point of view."

Is that a meme? Cuz whether it is or not, it's a fantastic phrase.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... Good one. I like how the formatting is a complete mess.

Ah yeah formatting, maybe I'll put in effort next time.

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let's talk in german now! Uh... Auf wiedersehen dummkopf!

Ah... reminds me of the fact I had to drop german class today because my dad wanted me to take a class and well it took up 2, damn it I liked that class a lot.... ugh...

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Será hijo de p--

HAHAHAHAHAH

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait-- Reese! Since when do you speak spanish?

Sp... anish...?

Yeah, spanish!

What are you talking about, tactician? This is the dialect of the Ligan region!

Wait, what...? Isn't that right below us-- Wait, hold up! If they speak spanish in the country to the south... we're speaking english here... and Volcens... then that means...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I'M SERVING THE UNITED STATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!

United... what? I mean, I guess we ARE a union of states... But it's called the Berwick League, if you forgot.

Hehehe, well shit. We serve the US woooo freedom, 'murica!

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Le map music.

Oh right this one i forgot where I heard it before, it's pretty good. I think I saw it in an earlier map, which it is too epic for.

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let's go. Today's Imperial commander is Gorzevalus, who is a meme in Japan. Aethin explained the reason to me: Gorzevalus's japanese name is ゴーゼワロス.

ゴーゼ looks like an emoji, as you can plainly see, and ワロス is a slang for laughing. Thus, people found him very risible indeed, leading to stuff like this video's existence (notice the date), or this thing that Aethin sent to me:

I see his romanization is not exactly identical to his name, I won't challenge Aethin on it because I don't know when something must be changed but here if I go by what I know, it's "Go-zewarosu", you can interpret a "-" (elongated vowel) as an r because we can do the same in here, you can make a vowel longer and not say the r and it sounds somewhat the same way, and formally writing an r symbol in japanese can make it be interpreted as an L because japanese. Anyways, the u at the end too because those aren't pronounced. But the biggest change I noticed was wa to va...

Also what an ancient video yeah...

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Yeah, that's it.

Gaiden: Guys please move for one turn
Sociedad: Guacala, mal juego

Berwick: Guys please move for one turn
Sociedad: Ala que bello juego

En fin, la hipotalamo.

12 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ballistae with 80% hit. Holy... shit. F durability is awful, though. A shame I can't capture this guy. The springald, even if it'd break in no time, could be useful, and Burroughs could use the extra bolts.

Yeah 80 hit is sexy.

12 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This never gets old, I swear.

it legitimately is a good skill that helps him stay relevant or atleast have a niche of his own, negating enemy phase counters somewhat reliably is godlike. At teh very least he can probably safely lure enemies (that he can counterattack).

12 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ballista animations in this game are so pretty.

They are pretty cool.

 

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Don't forget that Burroughs starts with 87 experience for some undiscernible reason. Thus...

Ahahahahahahahahah! Yes! Every other stat is more or less useless for Burroughs (by all means he should never be getting within reach of enemies with his ginormous range), so accuracy and power might as well be a perfect level for him. Nice! Good start, very good start.

...Except, I just checked the Serenes wiki, and much like crossbows, ballistae ignore the user's strength. So yeah. Even that is completely useless. Accuracy is all Burroughs wants.

87 XP? huh... Woooo Strength! Oh wait just accuracy matters... well that's still cool.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahahahahaha! You cannot defeat the Adel!

Adel fun

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Seriously, how can this moron with a rusty ballista hit more things than a mage with years of training under his belt?

Come on man he's still depressed 😞 well ok it's been some time but poor Percie, if only the RNG was kind to him...

Quote

Ahahahahahahah! He has so much experience missing that he's been able to transform that into the ability to make enemies miss as well! I don't know if I've said it before, but I love this guy's cape games. Really, anyone who does cape flips is awesome in my book. It's why I love Lyon's animations so much. Best FE villain just for that. And, you know, the rest. I'm a Lyon stan, always been. Maybe that's why I liked Pelleas as much as I did...

What a bane to transform into a boon... heh! Though please Percy hit!

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Anyway, Perceval's cape movements cannot save him from the fate of having horrible screenshots of his attacks taken by me. Seriously, I swear every time I press F12 the thunder isn't even on screen.

Lol! It's true though lel. Though tbh you must be sorta self-narrating when taking these screenshots and it's like 10 million per battle, so I won't give you flak for it.

Also yay he hit!

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

About another seven hours, I think... Any faster would be impossible. (14 turns)

I don't really give a damn what you think is impossible, soldier. Get it done in five! (10 turns)

Bwahahahahahahahah... That wasn't my addition, by the way. The game really does go back on its own hint two lines later. Lovely.

A-....are you Valthome? Hm? Hmm? HMMMM? Is that why you pointed me the finger? I think I found out the phony! Uwee Hee Hee Keehaaaaa!

Anyways, I thought the same thing, does the game think we're stupid? Also 10 turns sounds like a lot of time.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Now, since it's turn 5, I decided this'd be the perfect opportunity to savescum a spear level for Adel. It really isn't a Saint Rubenio LP without some rule breaking.

...except it wasn't necessary, because he got the thing on the first try! Ahhh, am I proud of ya, my boy! Please don't die.

Ha! Same thing happens to me sometimes, I use a savestate for one risky thing but I end up not needing it because I get it first try so I justify myself by saying "Well uh, I didn't end up using it anyways", lol. Also *just* (and that's probably me undershotting how long it will take) 10 more spear points for promo, woo!

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hmph... Archers. I don't like archers. They're coarse, and rough, and you know the rest.

heh...

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It is time, Sherlock. Show everybody what you are capable of! DOUBLE-SHOT!

Sher-- Sherlock!

Aw man... but unironically I've heard that once he gets good endgame bows, he becomes a menace thanks to just casually being able to shoot like 6 or 8 times in some turns.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, leaving aside the fail from earlier, Sherlock is doing quite well today! It's just like I've been saying all game. Sherlock just needs good equipment.

Hey so it's not just a small niche thing, it's probably majorly decided on.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Killing archers is fun. Let's give it another shot.

On this screenshot I thought Ruby was flying.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Seriously, these guys are so stupid. Hey, with the way I took these screenshots, it seems like Marcel has a seamless transition to his second hit. But nah, he returns to his idle position before his second swing.

Aww... that would have been pretty cool, the transition I mean!

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

We've taken the entrance. Not too much left till we win.

*Looks at side scroll bar* Yeaaaaah....

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, I haven't the faintest idea why I tried that. Pretty sure Percy would've died if he got hit twice by the archer, which he very much could have.

Perhaps your brain has unconsciously stopped caring about Perceval.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Now... I know this looks terrible, but remember that Overwatch only triggers when the units enters the overwatcher's range. Since Ruby is already inside it, he can't pull it off.

How does overwatch work btw?

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I provided two options and you decided to go for option C: piss off the tactician.

Lmao, but it's true.

13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Huh. Hah! I guess the fake-out was fake. Turn 14 it is, then. Good, that gives us a bit more leeway.

Huh... well then, 14 turns, even more plausible. Though tbf you're ironmanning so it's understandable why you go so slow.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

CKKK... OOOCKKK... CCCOCKKKKKKK...!!!

and ball torture?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...G... Guysh...? H-Hello...? *hic* What'sh going on...? Shounds like a... b-big fight... awww, my h-head... Lasht time I... drink on duty... Ain't worth the cell time...

Pfft yeah, I didn't notice. The hell is he doing in that cell? Did he have anything interesting? Maybe it's a way for Kaga to make it easy to cripple him since he can't suicide on you and thus be able to get money? I have no idea.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

But first, he'll cast a thunderbolt on his pee-pee. Okay, sure, different strokes for different folks, and all that.

I've... never heard that phrase before...

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Haha yes! Three cheers for the ballistician!

Yo that's really cool! And just one more level for aim... that's gonna be awesome!

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Overworld magic is also really pretty in this game.

Just like Owen.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And that's our first barrack downed! 250D is not great, but there are far juicier items hidden about the place, so let's not give up.

Tell you what, I once again thought that was 2500 moneys, lel.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A shame he didn't get strength. But it's all right, I suppose. It's not like he's ever going to catch up to Sylvis. Not in stats, anyway. He has other perks.

Like being good! Haha shots fired :)

Quote

Ah, finally! For some unfathomable reason, Gorzevalus has a unique battle theme. I mean, we've heard it before, but this is the first time it shows up as a battle theme. Gorzevalus shares it with... plot-critical lategame bosses. Not only that - plot-critical lategame bosses when confronted by specific units. Otherwise they just have Fight to the Death. I'm pretty sure Gorzevalus is the only enemy in the entire game that always uses this theme. So he's entirely unique in that aspect.

I can only assume Kaga knew he'd become a meme before he even released the game.

Kaga the ultimate memelord doesn't embrace the memes, he makes them in advance!

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, good luck getting through that. 13 years have passed, but Derrick's epicness is timeless!

13? Oh wait this world does happen in TRS's world right? Guess he is a TRS character or something somehow?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

All right, so here's the deal: the enemy only has one move. Owen can take one ballista bolt OR one crossbow bolt. Then we can heal him. Perceval dies to the ballista, so he flees for his life.

Hwahahahahahahah! Look at them running for their lives! What a sight to behold! Ahh, it was worth the wait after all!

Hot damn, that's a nasty situation...

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! You were mistaken in confronting this guy, now that he's got an orb with high accuracy!

Then why was he using inaccurate weaponry before if he had better alternatives?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...A? No, that's not right... what's the confirm button for this game, again? Since I've not played many PS games, I'm not familiar with their button distribution. As far as I'm concerned, it's X to confirm and Z to go back. Tab to go fast.

Uh... I think on a PS2 game it would be the cross button, or X

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

BWAAAAAAGH! Aa... uugh... N-No...

Oh, goodness... Sir!

Y-You...

...!

...Tell my wife... My sweet, dear... Mary... I... with all my heart, I... love her... Urk...!

Wait-- What's your wife's full name!? Where're you from?! What's she look like!? Tell me more! I can't find her like this...!

......

Damnit all! No! No! Sir, wake up...! Sir...!

War movies be like: _______
No but really they are like that, and suddenly war stops for a person to stop fighting and look at their friend lel.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He doesn't pretend to be a plane in the overworld. What a shame...

Hehehe... also if he missed this, it would give a whole new meaning to "Can't hit the broad side of a barn"

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

YES! YES! STRENGTH! AHAHAHAHAHAH, YES! TODAY IS THE DAY THAT HORSEMEN DO NOT PISS ME OFF!

YAY! I'm happy for you, this map has gone perfectly! I mean there were downs but so many good things too!

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, now it went down. That took long enough.

Pfft, Sherlock be as sadistic as Valery now?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Here's a fun little feature. We can set the units to standby.

Oh that's cool!

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is a really long update, isn't it?

Not as bad as the last map's one, or well just long I should say, though it even got on my nerves. This one was satisfying to see, despite the ocassional setbacks.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That's better. Gotta love when enemies get injured when they die.

How do you know he got injured? Because the HP bar got to be more red when hurt than usual?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You're free!

Mmh... mmngah... amh? Ah, I wash wondering where everyone had gone... Eeeyyyy, wait a minute... *hic* ye're not... ye're not one of the guysh... Who're...?

...! ENEMY RAID! DEFENSIVE MANEUVERS! YOU'LL NEVER GET PAST ME, BERWICK BASTARDS! BERSTERDS! Hah, whaddaya think 'bout that one? I came up with it aaaaaaaall by myself! Get it, bersterds? Since you're from the Berwick league, bastards, berwick... get it? Eh? Eh?

Please fight me already.

Hehehehe... quite a humorous side-story thingy.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Cool, 2 levels till movement.

Movement would be sexy.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Truly the saddest of Camuses. Who will translate Holy Sword of Silvanister now? Not that I'd demand it of Aethin anyway, he deserves to rest after Berwick.

You've made so many jokes about Translator and so far by now, I can't understand why just now I understood the joke... it's Aethin's pfp! And I only needed you to, you know, name drop him!

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahahahah! This is the kind of insane idea only Kaga could come up with. This axe disappears after this map (guess we just gave it back), and it has 40 might. 40. Of course, with 10% hit, this is completely useless against people. Fairly certain this is intended to be used against the buildings.

That is funny, and cool.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

All right, that's what you call a success! Everything went well. Well, except the end. We were unable to capture Aethin. A shame. But still, beyond that! Nobody died! After three maps in a row with casualties, it's so nice to finally be able to leave a map without anger in my heart. Ahhh, that feels good. It feels great, goddamnit! Yes! Woooooohoooooo! I am winner! Anyway. Next time, we go back to Corona with the good news. See you then, and now, I am going to say the F-word: Farewell!

Yeah! Hehe, it's nice to read such an update now.

Farewell,

or hello. You know how these things work, till later!



Except, one last thing. Everyone being at 90s in EXP means they will be close to leveling up next chapter, so that will be fun, even with the only-kill exp of this game.

Ok this is probably one of my longest replies ever damn.

[Hanes]

wait random edit, I haven't played every FE game wtf? Ugh my colors in my banner fucked up. I haven't played: Revelations and SIlver Snow. And that's it.

[Benice]

Spoiler

 

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, corona has made things rather inconvenient. I'll have to find something else to do with myself the rest of the year.

Well crud, I don't even know what to say anymore, since you've already played Berwick. I always say Berwick but... Eh, may as well go with it.

You should play Berwick! It's a danged amazing game!

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Please do, and let me know of the results.

Indeed I will. When I find the time between dying in Cog of Destiny, mountains of Math and trying to sleep more than  an hour a week.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, his growth is pretty good, it's not that surprising. 80%, to be precise. Holy moly.

Nice. I wonder if that effects the out of combat skill growths, or if it's totally different?

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

That probably helps, too. I used him in my second run and I don't think he ever got Pursuit at all! Though, to be fair, in this game I tend to not stick to one particular team. I like using a lot of people. That's bad for anyone's individual growth.

True, I always try to spread it around, but sooner or later one unit ends up doing much of the heavy lifting. It was actually Ruby in this run! Well, in the earlygame. Enid carried hard for a few chapters, (she got to level 22 without me even looking!) and Estie did some huge damage once trained. It wasn't actually that hard to use him, since his base skill of 22 his quite good.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahah... I like how you can hear AVGN go "cutscenes" at the start of the video.

Oh, that's funny, actually! I didn't notice that.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Incidentally, what's with people and Ruby profile pictures? You have adopted her portrait, Brightbow has her combat animations... what gives?

Eh, I would have gone with Sophie or Faye, but Ruby allows me to have a Morshu reference in my name.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Rest in pieces, character I also don't like.

I was mostly using her 'cause she was really bad.

And now she's not.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I like dumb things too, but Claude... infuriates me, because I can't help but wonder... If they didn't have to waste budget, resources and time on developing Claude, would the rest of the game have been better?

Probably...Or maybe they could have pushed back the release date for a few months? It could have been budget, though.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Mage Raphael. I love it.

Indeed. I swore that he'd land the final blow on Nemesis. I thought that going with two really awful units would make the game hard...

That said, Lorenz's paralogue was fantastic. I truly enjoyed that one, easily one of the better maps I've played as of late.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! I agree, actually. Not so much Raphael, but Ignatz is one of my favorites. I like his design, and I like his personality and character too, even if it's rather simple. Heck, I like him better than a lot of the guys with sob stories that everyone loses their heads over. I don't care if Sylvain has "good reasons" to act like he does, he's a misogynistic piece of shit.

I'm of the mind that good backstory =/= good character. There's plenty of characters with no backstory who are very strong, (Eliwood, for example) and characters with very simple backstories who are equally good. That's probably why I don't like much of the cast of Three Houses- a lot of them are Backstorybots. Like Bernadetta. And Sylvain. And Felix. Because why wouldn't the edgy swordlord be the best unit in the game.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

More than anything, though, I like Ignatz's transition to the timeskip. Legit one of the best changes in the entire game. Not only is his updated design one of my top 3 designs in the entire game, he also becomes an absolute badass. Seriously, when he went "I wasn't about to let you go" I was like "wha--that my boy Iggy? Really?!"

Huh. Haven't made it there yet, but we shall see.

Also, I'm getting serious warning flags that Jeralt will die. I'm calling it now. I sorta doubt that it'll be well-done, though, since Byleth seems to have basically no emotional connection to his pops.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah... It's really awful. In the B support he finally gets sick of her shit and lashes out at her (by which I mean, he yells at her to leave him alone already), and she literally goes, and I quote, "Maybe I...went a bit far that time... But he's so stubborn despite his ineptitude. I can't just leave it be. He's so foolish—constantly making a mess of things." Yeah, how about I make a mess of your face until you apologize to the man? At least she calms down in the A support... But unfortunately, it's not as satisfying as it should be, because she never apologizes.

WHY IS THIS THE UNIT WHO DOES THIS:

IF IT WERE SOMEONE WHO I LIKED, I WOULDN'T MIND SO MUCH, BUT NO! IT'S THE ONE WHO'S MINAS-TIER EVIL!!!!!!!!

No...No, that's too far. Even Lys isn't that bad.

And I'm also sad because even as a fighter she's been really good. I can't believe it...

But I know who I'm hiring to give her flowers for her birthday, and it is a certain lady knight with Raijin arrows and a Gastraphetes.

speaking of lady knights, in chapter 11 there's that one lady knight with a portrait for no reason. I...I went through Heck and back to attack her, but no battle quote or anything. Is she part of someone's character arc, or did Kaga just add that in to lure naive souls like me?

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, we'll see about my Burrie!

...Nah, I like Burroughs better. I don't know what it is about that name, but it feels so... satisfying to say. Burroughs.

It is satisfying.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Long is right, it must've taken you like 12 turns to get him there, just to die!

Ah, I actually just got Fritz to go on the wrong side of the river. And He was in prime position to get him! Until Assassin said no.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

No. No you did not. It's Gorzevalus.

Guuuhhh!

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Le map team. I know, two knights. Next map is not kind to them, and I'd like them to get some screentime in this chapter, so here they are.

Did Marcel even see combat once here?

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahahahah! This is the kind of insane idea only Kaga could come up with. This axe disappears after this map (guess we just gave it back), and it has 40 might. 40. Of course, with 10% hit, this is completely useless against people. Fairly certain this is intended to be used against the buildings.

Oooooooh...Hah. I always wondered if there was a reason for this.

 

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh. Marcel did do something.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

About as well as every other day, I see.

According to Kaga's notes, Perceval and Enid actually did try to hook up with Enid before her promotion event, but Perceval missed and ended up in Alex's bar.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Maybe by next chapter, he'll be able to nab that promotion. Unless he dies. That's always a possibility under my command.

Nah, neither Devil in the Valley nor chapter 10 should pose huge threats to an archer. Then again, with all the hidden enemies in both...

Also, Yalong is evil.

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

This is my last hope: a lucky crippling with lightning.

Please. It'll take up all the luck you have saved up just to have Percy hit!

On 9/21/2020 at 7:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, it was.

Marcel is a savage 12 year old. I wonder if Cecily knows that he's this spicy.

 

 

[Spara]

Spoiler

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, from what I've gathered, the US is kinda falling apart in this pandemic. My heart goes out to you and to all other US readers. Not that Spain is much better off, but... well, not quite the disaster you guys face.

It definitely could be worse, but it's infuriating nonetheless. Plus, at least we get to make "welcome to the party, pal" jokes in spite of ourselves. That's kinda fun.

 

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahahahah! Yes! Every other stat is more or less useless for Burroughs (by all means he should never be getting within reach of enemies with his ginormous range), so accuracy and power might as well be a perfect level for him. Nice! Good start, very good start.

...Except, I just checked the Serenes wiki, and much like crossbows, ballistae ignore the user's strength. So yeah. Even that is completely useless. Accuracy is all Burroughs wants.

It's already happening. Now your Faye is gonna be strength-cursed for the rest of the game. Sorry. 

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

About another seven hours, I think... Any faster would be impossible. (14 turns)

I don't really give a damn what you think is impossible, soldier. Get it done in five! (10 turns)

I think this dialogue is written this way to say that the springalds will appear 10 turns after the turn this dialogue appears, not 10 turns after the map starts. I think that's why they just kinda did nothing on turns 10 and 14, and they started coming out on turn 15 which (I believe) is 10 turns after this convo.

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It's this, to be precise. Sure, 3 strikes, but 1 might, 20% hitrate, F durability... yeah, this thing is no chu-ko-nu. And since Sylvis already has a better chu-ko-nu, we can safely hand this over to our favorite nerdy billionaire.

If Sylvis bites the dust (god forbid, she's great), you can stack this with killer arrows and triple shot on Sherlock and pray to the RNG gods against Thor. 

Speaking of whom, how many units are gonna die to him? After the Elbert escapade, I'd guess at least another one. A word of warning: if you don't kill Thor a few turns after you discover him, he'll leave the cave. Learned that the hard way in my ranked run, where I saved just as Volo and Czene were trying to escape and, right on my turn save, the bastard came flying out. They survived, but Czene had to play a very deadly game of cat-and-mouse. 

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Who will translate Holy Sword of Silvanister now? Not that I'd demand it of Aethin anyway, he deserves to rest after Berwick.

Who needs a translation? The r/FE discord's kagasaga channel has been pretty active in HSoS discussion as of late, and AggroIncarnate's spreadsheet is pretty nice. 

In all seriousness, I really want to see what happens next in the story. Zephgarus has some videos of a very, very rough translation going through chapter 15 or so, which gives the general idea, but VS1's great writing really pulled me in. 

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahahahah! This is the kind of insane idea only Kaga could come up with. This axe disappears after this map (guess we just gave it back), and it has 40 might. 40. Of course, with 10% hit, this is completely useless against people. Fairly certain this is intended to be used against the buildings

God, I love this kind of thing. It's a fun little temporary bonus, and I'm glad that Kaga stuck with his good ol' jank in future games. Apparently HSoS has some stuff ripped straight out of or inspired by Berwick, like the Cavalry Lance not being able to counter/be countered or a playable thief with Canto. 

On 9/21/2020 at 10:15 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Just like last time, 30 spear skill would've been a pipe dream - but I did manage to get him to 22, at least. If we can keep this pace up... Hm. Maybe. The dream may not be dead yet.

Ah yes, one of the units who actually gets worse when promoting. Lances don't mesh well with Adel's kit, the stats are kinda negligible, and losing LtCav movement hurts. Plus, I think his unmounted movement type also changes from Infantry to Knight, which further hurts on maps like 14-m. He's still one of my favorite units to use because vantage-tanking is so fun, but the promotion's pretty stupid. 

For variety stuff, I'm gonna throw in some music and other stuff I've done recently.

Music: I've been listening to some of Neil Cicierega's mashups lately. If you don't know who he is, you might know of the Harry Potter Puppet Pals or the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. This track probably gives the best idea of his work: 

FE stuff: been doing a randomized FE10 run. Some fun stuff includes a STR/RES capped Cat Micaiah, a GK Nolan with 30 more STR/SKL/DEF than RES/SPD (made the caps for each tier 30/40/50), and Sentinel Heather with like 45 speed. When I finish, I might do FE12 blind. I played FE3 book 2 over a year ago, finally am getting around to this one.  

[BrightBow]

On 9/21/2020 at 4:15 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Incidentally, what's with people and Ruby profile pictures? You have adopted her portrait, Brightbow has her combat animations... what gives?

It's just that the tournament scene made it very easy to record her idle. It's a lot harder during actual gameplay where you need the help of an enemy with an intro quote.

And Sylvis doesn't have much of an idle. Her cape just moves ever so slightly.

[Saint Rubenio]

Part 66 - Robber general.

For those of you who don't care about the fanfic, this might be the shortest update to date. How interesting, given it follows what's perhaps the largest update to date. So yeah. Just a heads up.

Grand dad:

Spoiler

On 9/21/2020 at 9:12 PM, Dayni said:

  Hide contents

  It is also true that 3H overuses Defeat boss, encouraging the attempts to find these starts.

Good. We agree to an extent.

Don't worry about it.

I will if I want to!

Funny reading this after you commenting on my update swearing about Reunion at Dawn.

Hah! Yeah. It was some great timing. Gotta say, the dig at the fact that I didn't finish the shitty map was uncalled for

Meanwhile, the patch they're apparently more willing to take is the reason we meme about Bandit Kempf.

At this point it's just nostalgia. Still remember the outrage over the Pugi change to Bhuj. Then IntSys changed it too when they added Osian to Heroes, and people had to shut up and take it. That was satisfying, if I'm being honest.

To be fair, a large percentage of those names won't ever need to be changed and the proportion that might get changed are going to depend on how localisation is handled.

True enough, but... I mean, I know I always use the same example, but shit like Carrion exists in the list. I'd think it's just common sense not to call a person Corpse, even if IntSys said so.

They also can't lose to Camilla since she already won one.

Maybe so, but aren't there still, like, ten big tiddy Heroes OCs that can win? The likes of... Plumeria, is one of them? Triandra? Freyja? Laegjarn? Laevatein? Mirabillis? You know, those gals that look like they belong in a cheap knock-off gacha scam, not in official Fire Emblem.

I cannot understand the appear of such characters, personally (well, that's a lie - I do understand the two appeals they have, I just don't think it's enough), but last I checked they consistently rank extremely high on the polls. Far above, y'know, real FE characters. I mean, hell, I just checked, and Moody Loli from Heroes got second place in the second poll. What gives?

I know I don't feel the Belf anger, but still.

Well, to be honest, most of the time I don't either. I like Vergil better, but eh. Who cares, really. At the end of the day, they're just names. That's another reason why the outrage isn't reasonable. Sure, I don't like Carrion, but if a translation patch that is otherwise of a high quality calls him Carrion, I'm still going to use it. That'd be like using the completely broken TRS translation over Aethin's version because I liked Marajah better than Maruj.

Aren't directly for sure. That is something that isn't as fixed any more with increasing online interaction, but the timezones in particular act as a deterrent for now.

True, true. I made the mistake of considering speaking of involved in the making of FE as if they were one singular entity. It's like KagaSaga - Kaga is the name we all know, but behind these games there's far more people than just him. It's a big issue with the industry as a whole, I feel. Too many people critical to the development of games just don't get the credit they deserve.

...You know, since the subject came up, I'd just like to say - I'd be happy if IntSys stopped handing their games to Treehouse. They have such an awful track record... pretty much every single game they've translated (in this series, at least) is filled to the brim with incoherences, mistranslations and typos. Meanwhile, the guys who did Shadow Dragon were only held back by the relatively barebones script. Imagine Shadow Dragon's beautiful prose with a bigger story like Three Houses's or Radiant Dawn's. Maybe then Claude wouldn't have been terrible!

It will be fascinating to see what happens with any remakes in future, because IS seem to have tried to keep the names consistent across releases with 3H and I wonder what the result would be especially for Judgral titles.

Well, as I've said in the past, I just want a FE6 remake. FE4 could probably use a remake more, but FE6 is a game that, in my opinion, only has two major flaws: story and polish. And, lo and behold, those are exactly the two things that Echoes did best. A FE6 remake has the potential to be truly great, if they handle it like they did Echoes. Literally all of its issues could be fixed.

...Of course, that's when they decide to add an avatar and the game will be ruined. But I have faith. They didn't do that with Echoes.

Anyway, what does this have to do with the whole name thing? Nothing, I just wanted to once again state that a FE6 remake would be the perfect next installment for me. Anything else, I will pass up on until well after release. Heck, even with a FE6 remake I'd be cautious. Because fuck me if they're going to slip another 3H into my pocket. Never again.

ReesexWard is not the ship I'd expect is what I'm meaning.

Hah! Well, I mean... They certainly have better chemistry than Reese and his sister-formerly-in-heat-now-very-cold.

As for Groundhog Day, it's a grand enough comedy.

Quite grand, I imagine. It's quite the famous film.

Maybe.

I still stand by my theory.

Do you?

Bornia's the only land border, correct?

There wasn't any others as far as I remembered.

With Remagen bridge down, the Lowlands don't count. Aside from Bornia, we also border Liga, but that's mostly a desert nation, not optimal for an invasion. We went there the one map where Enid got her final point of magic, remember?

Do a barrel roll has a very different context in TF2.

Yes, quite.

I'd forgotten that man had died.

He did. There was a bit of a tribute to the man in TF2, they put a statue of the Soldier in most of the game's maps for a month.

Then the situation got ugly when the tryhards started to scream about people saluting the statue instead of "playing the game". I swear, there are some real shitheads in the TF2 community. I'm not even talking competitive matches - people get mad when other players spend five seconds standing around in casual matches. Like, c'mon. Who cares, really?

I feel like it's Age of Empires with all these palisades.

Maybe Gorzevalus is just a big AoE player?

As for the items, so like that one RD map but you don't have to enter before destroying them to get the item?

Yes, more or less.

Alright, I guess that meme doesn't work because I don't get Japanese all that well.

Yeah, as I said, it would've been difficult to keep the meme. Would've required to name him something like "Uwulol", and that's just... no.

That 2007 video's amazingly pixely.

Isn't it? I just love that it exists. The video itself is nothing special, but knowing the context, it's two memes duking it out all the way back in 2007. It really does feel like a time capsule.

Now that is a batter Tales title than Phantasia.

Hah! I wish I understood the joke.

He's pretty intense.

Really not the laugh riot his name should be.

Aethin mentioned somewhere (I think it was his blog) that Gorzevalus was named by the scenario designer who wrote the mission's plot. An extremely serious man, apparently, so he clearly did not intend for the boss to be humorous in any way.

Did he set the bolt the first time he pulled, or did he have to redo it to fire?

I considered poking fun at him for failing miserably, actually. But to tell you the truth, I'm not quite sure what that's supposed to look like.

So he literally only cares about two stats.

Alright.

Nope. He only cares about one. Of course, HP and defense would be fine to survive the occasional hit, but letting him get hit at all is a bad idea, with his unfixable movement and unarmedness.

I mean, it is lightning, you shouldn't really find it that easy to catch on a picture.

Fair enough.

Really making my theory add up with this line.

Now I'm picturing you carefully examining every single one of Derrick's battle forecasts to see who's close to him when he gains the 10 hit and 4 crit.

By all means, knock yourself out.

Sure, why not be clear about that?

The contradiction could confuse people.

To be honest, it did confuse me. 9.99/10 game.

That or he thinks he's a crackshot.

Considering Derrick didn't raise his shield he might have been accurate.

Derrick realized that he wouldn't need to use more than 2% of his power against the likes of that idiot.

That, and Owen was right there.

Derrick actually getting strength.

That's some surprise to be sure.

I just love that he's still around. Worst unit in the game, surviving the top tier paladin. That's some shit. Of course, it helps that I dote on him like my own child, whereas I threw Clifford into all sorts of danger under the assumption that he was invincible.

Wait, is the engineer into people barking orders at him?

Quote

sultry

 

(of weather) uncomfortably warm and with air that is slightly wet

 

There you go. He's just saying something along the lines of "don't get your knickers in a knot".

I shouldn't judge, but he should probably get help for that.

Kinkshaming, are we? Well, what if it's consensual? Maybe those two are a couple, and they both know that they enjoy that kind of dynamic! How's that?

...Actually, that only makes the way it ended more depressing... and it implies a certain degree of infidelity, so... Yeah. Probably for the best that we don't go with this explanation...

A shame that there was no doubling pose.

Yeah.

Though his idle pose is nice and all, so maybe they decided that was enough of a reason.

Marcel has too much swag to not return to his idle pose.

Did you lie about when the reinforcements would come, Kaga?

Oh you!

Kaga is kind like that.

As a surprise?

I assume he got stuck there, either because of stupidity or because he's in the drunk tank.

Let's go with that.

That's pretty astute of the gunner if he understands the meta.

Not that it matters to you, but still.

It is, yes.

Considering it's Japanese, the confirm button's probably circle, x is to go back and I know there's a button for square in combat for Berwick.

I think it worked like that for TRS, and the buttons are mostly the same, so it's fair to assume it goes like that here, yes.

This second image is amazing to me. It's perfectly straight.

I imagine the folks over at r/catriasarmpit would like the other image better.

Sherlock's a surprisingly helpful unit this time around.

Yes. It's a first for him. Hopefully, more to come.

Pocketing the horse shouldn't be possible.

But here we are.

I didn't pocket it, actually. I pocketed one of the shields, then picked up the horse.

I'm glad for the misunderstanding, though, because it gave birth to this image.

He realised Sylvis could possibly get more strength.

I mean, given the way she grows for me...

...I phrased that poorly, didn't I? If it were anyone else, it'd be fine, but I need to watch my words around Sylvis. People are quick to assume.

Poor engineer-

Okay, never mind.

I pulled a sneaky on you.

I can't think of an FE that would handle a falling asset like that.

To be fair, it did fall right after the attack. It was just the skill gain notification that delayed it slightly.

Burroughs needed another chance!

Why leave him there?

Learn to read, dammit! I clearly said that he couldn't cross the downed fence! As for the rest of the map, well... if Marcel can't climb up cliffs, what chance does poor Burroughs have?

Berstards would have been better 2/10.

I hate you.

Right! I'll do you for that!

Yes! Go Marcel!

Fair is fair, he was a tough nut.

Shame he faced some tougher nuts this time.

Like... Sherlock.

Damn, poor guy... if it was Sylvis, at least... but no. It was the guy who's spent the entire game being a scrub.

That is a meme weapon.

Imagine if you could keep it, but it had F durability. That'd be a lot of fun to see imo.

It may only have one shot, but what a shot!

So, the course induction started and there's a ton of online module stuff to do. Yay.

Better than catching the corona, I guess.

Also, good day to post the next part.

Okay, the guy's camouflage is great.

Also, I do not get it.

 

On 9/21/2020 at 9:38 PM, BrightBow said:

 

  Hide contents

 

It is indeed good old Yoshiwhatever Kira.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

Yeah, that looks nothing like Axel, sorry.

...Reese, though...

Yeah, on second thought that phrasing does kinda make it sound more like that one time when Spiderman killed Mary Jane with his radioactive sperm.

Ahahahahahahahahah! Amazing.

Fake-out? 10 turns was referring to the turns needed from when the dialog occurred. I don't know which turn that dialog occurs, but I know that in your case you already had Derrick inside the breach. So it has to have been several turns in.

That's an interesting coincidence, then, since the ballistae do appear on turn 14. Maybe the "fake-out" was supposed to be a way for Kaga to show the exact turn it'd happen in a sort of roundabout way? How... peculiar.

 

 

On 9/22/2020 at 6:55 AM, This boi uses Nino said:

  Hide contents

Well you guys panicked like a few months ago but you acted decisively and it stopped spreading as much, that at least is commendable. I guess you have the EU around to judge your country and they aren't an ocean away like the US with Nato, but I'll still commend your culture for not being THAT selfish.

Well, thanks for the compliment, I suppose.

Oof...

Back in June, they told me I should apply for the course in September, for a number of reasons that do not include failing the last year (I actually did quite well). Then in September it turns out they have to cut the extraordinary spots due to management problems with corona. So I was left twiddling my thumbs.

At least I got this laptop out of it. It runs better than my last computer, and I get to take my games to places!

Bwahahaha hehehe... guess it's not Ranting Roo-(trash)bin time yet. Keeheehee 

no offense

Roobin? That's not even how you say my name...! You of all people should know!

An eye for an eye...

Makes the whole world blind.

- Mahatma Ghandi (maybe)

 

But I win, so it's worth it.

- Ruben "Saint Rubenio" Fernandez

Well when lines can be used in other conversations as well, like when I say "I see" then yeah I can't quite figure it out can I?

No worries. Happens to me too, is what I was trying to say.

Well eh, I didn't mind it too much, wasn't being serious either. Anyways reading minds is uncool and a privacy violation, you know what would be cool? Being able to send to someone else the same ideas you have without having to say them out loud, like have our neuro-electrical mind process just pass to someone else in the combination that will make them understand what I mean, or want to do, etc.

That'd be interesting. But how would you tune out annoying people then?

Gowther in the Seven Deadly Sins Anime actually does this in the final episode of Season 1, sends everyone a brain shock so they all get in on the plan to defeat the big bad guy of that arc, it's really cool

Seven Deadly Sins... Isn't that the one with the giant waifu and redhead Ned Flanders that's absurdly powerful?

Wrong! Haven't used Nino in ages, like I said somewhere after in my last update, now I'm known as Hanes around places and have a Heath profile picture.

Well, then next time I'll call you by your name: Heinz.

Sorry

Did he ever say that? Lol.

Apparently he says it all the time. Wouldn't know, myself. I've never really watched him.

I do not keep up to date with release dates so yeah idk. Also you had me confused there for a bit about what you meant by 25. Small tip: next time say The 25th or maybe even "On the 25th" so it's clear it's a date.

Well... It was the remake of Mafia 1, but they just announced, 3 days from release, that they've added Denuvo. I'm not fond of Denuvo, so... eh. I think I might wait on it. At least a few days, see what people say about it. I mean, I already intended to wait, but now I'm more sure, if that makes any sense.

Hehe... yeaaaaah...

Actually... Well, on the off-chance that you care about spoilers for that game, I'll put it in a box:

Spoiler

While trying to find the game's name, I discovered that you apparently spend the whole game searching for that one girl's body parts so you can revive her. And you can actually succeed, from what I gathered. So... yeah. It wasn't just gore porn for the sake of gore porn. It's sets up the driving force of the entire game's plot. That one scene.

Being proud is alright, that would be cool. I remeber you shared your BWS portrait collection, but I haven't searched for it since it was on new topics.

That... wasn't my BWS portrait collection, actually. That was the portrait dump Aethin generously sent to me when I told him I'd be LPing Berwick Saga. It's all the portraits in the game (including unused ones that I occassionally use for my things), but it does not contain any of my own making.

Yeah I'm not too happy of my voice... I'm 16! Not 12... 

You don't sound 12, though. Slightly nasal voice in the video, but nothing too embarrassing, I'd say.

Dude I legit unlisted every video I had before, I don't get why that one is still there. Guess I'll go and double-check if it is unlisted, but I legit clicked on a box to unlist ALL my vids. I thought maybe it would show as a placeholder until I put a new video...

Yeah, the video is hidden, but that's kinda useless when it is also featured on your channel's front page.

anyways I have enough skill to program in Scratch if I want to, I'm just lazy as balls.

Scratch is pretty cool. Nifty little learning tool.

Yeah... wait it's not that song is it? *clicks on it* OMG you and I watched the same video on old youtube tutorials didn't you? Bwa- hehehehe!

It's the most infamous tutorial song from the early 2000s. You, I and every other kid from our generation has heard it.

Duly Noted. Also that's a funny thing for them to stand on Reese... before getting demolished lel.

From what I recall, they demolished me, actually. Took a few retries to beat them, and they got away with a captured Adel.

Yeah... damn it Adel!

Damn you and your promotion thresholds!

I pissed off my dad, recently I've been more rebellious than before because I've released my frustrations on him. I don't like him one bit.

Ouch... Well, I won't pry. I'm sorry I made you bring it up.

Also everytime he grounds me he brings Fire Emblem up and tells me to stop acting like a know-it-all because I play the game but like... when the fuck did I say I think I'm smart because of it? Oh well this isn't the place to bring in my familial problems.

My condolences. My dad and I have never seen eye-to-eye when it comes to our likes and dislikes, but he's been a good dad and we are in good terms. Can't complain, in that respect.

On the topic of Fire Emblem, I played some Souls of the Forest Reverse Lunatic and damn! I finally got every treasure on that defense map (Chapter 6) it was such an experience wow, but I'm definitely proud of myself! Even if some treasures are a bigger pain than what it's worth (like a Secret Book) it still gives me bragging rights.

That sounds cool. Though I'm busy replaying Sun God's Wrath. Not sure what to think about the fact that I considered replaying a number of FEs, including my supposed favorite FE12, but ended up going for the fangame. Seriously, I love that game too much. Such a fun FE. Unless you're one of those guys who plays for the story only, then I don't imagine you'll enjoy it as much as I do.

Yeah well played means like maybe halfway, maybe just one or two chapters. I've touched them in other words.

Ah, well, if we count that, I've "played" FE4, too. Never made it past the first castle. In fact, I don't think I ever made it far enough to recruit friggin' Quan and company. But I've played it.
 
Yeah! Once you promote Alm, he equips a bow! That's why you do Celica's maps first, it gets him his promotion once Celica goes to speak to the old sage in Sage's Hamlet, then Alm has to go to a Shrine and gets a big fat promotion bonus (which makes him relevant even on hard if he's base level holy fuck) which also allows him to use bows... give him a killer bow, plus have someone else killer bow too and... yeah Hunter's volley is how you trivialize Nuibaba's abode.

How interesting.

Alright, though Seliph has ponytails I guess is what makes him look girly, on the other hand it means he's cute but still tall and epic. That's a combination... hehe I think I like it.

Haha Boi is in love with Seliph.

Ward game overs? That's really cool I guess, or rather Kaga didn't want to write a story without Ward so he just made it impossible to kill him.

In previous games, he always made the advisor a NPC. Vestaria Saga, too. IntSys makes them a unit that retreats upon dying. Pretty sure Berwick Saga is the only one where the advisor behaves like a lord (heck, he even shares Reese's peculiar availability). Considering that and the fact that he has a lot more moments for himself than most other advisor types, I'd say he easily qualifies as a protagonist.

I guess that makes more sense.

It does, doesn't it?

Wow what a high bar. I made a Scheme and am schemier than Claude. Truly amazing. Hehe

I mean, Claude's biggest scheme in 3H is "I hope that Teach cures Dimitri of his Edginess so they may come to rescue my ass from the Empire." Not even kidding.

That's a cool detail.

Thanks!

:thinking: Yeah I guess.

What is there to think about? He's Volcens! It should come to you as soon as you hear the name!

Hahahahaha! Jajajajaa! Ok that's funny

Haha, thanks!

Hehehehehehe 

It's not funny. Screw him, goddamnit!

Reesemomento.png

Quite, yes.

Is that a meme? Cuz whether it is or not, it's a fantastic phrase.

It's a reference to Star Wars. I swear like 90% of that franchise's lines are memeable.

Ah yeah formatting, maybe I'll put in effort next time.

Pfft... Please do.

Ah... reminds me of the fact I had to drop german class today because my dad wanted me to take a class and well it took up 2, damn it I liked that class a lot.... ugh...

Oh... I'm so sorry, I keep reminding you of such things...

HAHAHAHAHAH

Hehehe, well shit. We serve the US woooo freedom, 'murica!

Where did this hamburger come from?

Oh right this one i forgot where I heard it before, it's pretty good. I think I saw it in an earlier map, which it is too epic for.

I mean, Berwick music is epic in general.

I see his romanization is not exactly identical to his name, I won't challenge Aethin on it because I don't know when something must be changed but here if I go by what I know, it's "Go-zewarosu", you can interpret a "-" (elongated vowel) as an r because we can do the same in here, you can make a vowel longer and not say the r and it sounds somewhat the same way, and formally writing an r symbol in japanese can make it be interpreted as an L because japanese. Anyways, the u at the end too because those aren't pronounced. But the biggest change I noticed was wa to va...

As somebody who doesn't speak japanese, I think it's important to change the names to a certain extent so they look like names to westerners. Of course, you shouldn't chance something like "Bartholomew" to "Joey", but Gozewarosu is just... no, that doesn't look like anything. Gorzevalus is close enough that it makes sense as a translation, while also looking like a plausible old-timey name. Even though I'm pretty sure it isn't.

It actually surprises me. For the longest time I thought it was some sort of ancient name that nobody uses anymore, maybe a ye olde version of "Gonzalo" or something, but I googled it and the only results are Berwick-related. Huh. There's also a couple of unrelated images from this LP, and... fucking Arknights memes. Arknights memes. When googling Gorzevalus. Thanks, Golb. You ruined Gorzevalus. Good job.

Also what an ancient video yeah...

It's history!

Gaiden: Guys please move for one turn
Sociedad: Guacala, mal juego

Berwick: Guys please move for one turn
Sociedad: Ala que bello juego

En fin, la hipotalamo.

The difference is that in Berwick you spend one turn moving. In Gaiden you spend one turn fighting.

...Okay, maybe not, but-- Berwick is still a damned masterpiece, and that's final, goddamnit!

Yeah 80 hit is sexy.

Not when it's on the enemy, it's not!

it legitimately is a good skill that helps him stay relevant or atleast have a niche of his own, negating enemy phase counters somewhat reliably is godlike. At teh very least he can probably safely lure enemies (that he can counterattack).

Yeah... Range 1 becomes a lot more common as the game goes on, but Adel is still fun to use even this far into it.

They are pretty cool.

Really, I don't think there's a single animation in this game that's bad. Some make less sense than others, but everyone is fabulous.

87 XP? huh... Woooo Strength! Oh wait just accuracy matters... well that's still cool.

Quite.

Adel fun

Adel good.

Come on man he's still depressed 😞 well ok it's been some time but poor Percie, if only the RNG was kind to him...

Maybe he'd be able to stop feeling so inadequate... It'd probably help if I stopped bullying him, too.

What a bane to transform into a boon... heh! Though please Percy hit!

He's quite talented at being a talentless hack. But, hey, I can't complain. I mean, it's not like I can cast thunderbolts!

Lol! It's true though lel. Though tbh you must be sorta self-narrating when taking these screenshots and it's like 10 million per battle, so I won't give you flak for it.

Well, I don't really self-narrate. I just try to take the flashiest combat shots possible. Thunder just goes by too fast.

Also yay he hit!

An unbelievable occurrence!

A-....are you Valthome? Hm? Hmm? HMMMM? Is that why you pointed me the finger? I think I found out the phony! Uwee Hee Hee Keehaaaaa!

Wait, what? Where did this come from? Did you quote the wrong thing...? Are you high? You're high, aren't you?

Anyways, I thought the same thing, does the game think we're stupid?

Kaga made the game. It goes without saying. He doesn't just think we're stupid, he also hates us.

Also 10 turns sounds like a lot of time.

Well... Yeah, but I'd rather not lose people by rushing.

Ha! Same thing happens to me sometimes, I use a savestate for one risky thing but I end up not needing it because I get it first try so I justify myself by saying "Well uh, I didn't end up using it anyways", lol. Also *just* (and that's probably me undershotting how long it will take) 10 more spear points for promo, woo!

Hahahahahaha... Ahh, the wonders of accidental virtue.

heh...

Ah, so you got this one.

Aw man... but unironically I've heard that once he gets good endgame bows, he becomes a menace thanks to just casually being able to shoot like 6 or 8 times in some turns.

That's a bit of an exaggeration, but... yeah, after promotion he becomes a monster with the right bow. He just takes a while to get going, is all.

Hey so it's not just a small niche thing, it's probably majorly decided on.

So I've heard, yes.

On this screenshot I thought Ruby was flying.

Hah!

Aww... that would have been pretty cool, the transition I mean!

Well, it's still cool.

*Looks at side scroll bar* Yeaaaaah....

I don't know how the update got so long, I swear.

Perhaps your brain has unconsciously stopped caring about Perceval.

Brain, damnit! We don't need more deaths! Especially not mages. They don't exactly grow on trees in this game, y'know!

How does overwatch work btw?

The moment a unit enters the overwatcher's range, the overwatcher shoots. If the target gets hit, they're stopped in their tracks and cannot act. Of course, for this to work the target has to cross the border of the overwatcher's range. Hence why it failed when Ruby was already standing within 2 hexes of the archer. She was inside his range, so she didn't need to enter it.

Lmao, but it's true.

Well, it's all right. I'm relatively happy with him, since he got to 22 spear points.

Huh... well then, 14 turns, even more plausible. Though tbf you're ironmanning so it's understandable why you go so slow.

I am kinda slow in general, to be fair. Though these days I've become a bit ballsier in my strategies, when I'm not Ironmanning. The risk of losing people forever is just too terrifying.

and ball torture?

Hey, now...

Pfft yeah, I didn't notice. The hell is he doing in that cell? Did he have anything interesting? Maybe it's a way for Kaga to make it easy to cripple him since he can't suicide on you and thus be able to get money? I have no idea.

He has nothing interesting, so... Pretty sure it was just a mistake.

I've... never heard that phrase before...

Well, it exists.

Yo that's really cool! And just one more level for aim... that's gonna be awesome!

He already barely missed in this map. Imagine with 30 more hit on top of his regular accuracy.

Just like Owen.

Look how the tables have turned.

Tell you what, I once again thought that was 2500 moneys, lel.

Get glasses!

Like being good! Haha shots fired 🙂

Did you just insult my waifu? Those bombs cannot arrive soon enough.

Kaga the ultimate memelord doesn't embrace the memes, he makes them in advance!

You know what they say, he does it first!

13? Oh wait this world does happen in TRS's world right? Guess he is a TRS character or something somehow?

...No. It's a... a reference to the ancient video I shared. Berwick takes place hundreds of years after TRS. The connections are small at best.

Hot damn, that's a nasty situation...

As it turned out, it wasn't quite so bad. Thanks, Sherlie!

Then why was he using inaccurate weaponry before if he had better alternatives?

Because before he didn't. Lightning requires level 7. Also, it only has range 1. He'll have to go back to thunder for that sweet bow range.

Uh... I think on a PS2 game it would be the cross button, or X

This is a japanese game, though. It's circle overthere. For... some reason.

War movies be like: _______
No but really they are like that, and suddenly war stops for a person to stop fighting and look at their friend lel.

I mean, isn't this the same series(es...?) where time freezes while two people have a casual chat in the middle of the battlefield?

Hehehe... also if he missed this, it would give a whole new meaning to "Can't hit the broad side of a barn"

Hah! Now I kinda wish he had missed.

YAY! I'm happy for you, this map has gone perfectly! I mean there were downs but so many good things too!

Yeah!

Pfft, Sherlock be as sadistic as Valery now?

Not really, the engineer lived.

Oh that's cool!

Berwick Saga: Pinnacle of QoL.

Not as bad as the last map's one, or well just long I should say, though it even got on my nerves. This one was satisfying to see, despite the ocassional setbacks.

Wait... are you saying... you enjoy updates more... when I don't suffer?

You've gotta be the first.

...Nah, actually most people (Butterman notwithstanding) do seem to enjoy my victories more. For some reason.

How do you know he got injured? Because the HP bar got to be more red when hurt than usual?

The damage text is green. Usually it's blue.

Hehehehe... quite a humorous side-story thingy.

Thanks. I do try.

Movement would be sexy.

Especially when his base movement is 3.

You've made so many jokes about Translator and so far by now, I can't understand why just now I understood the joke... it's Aethin's pfp! And I only needed you to, you know, name drop him!

Pffft... Good one, Heinz. Good one.

That is funny, and cool.

Also completely useless.

Yeah! Hehe, it's nice to read such an update now.

I am glad you think so.

Farewell,

or hello. You know how these things work, till later!

Hey, how's things going today?

Except, one last thing. Everyone being at 90s in EXP means they will be close to leveling up next chapter, so that will be fun, even with the only-kill exp of this game.

True enough.

Ok this is probably one of my longest replies ever damn.

Don't worry about it. It was a long update.

 

On 9/22/2020 at 6:56 AM, This boi uses Nino said:

wait random edit, I haven't played every FE game wtf? Ugh my colors in my banner fucked up. I haven't played: Revelations and SIlver Snow. And that's it.

Actually, last I checked the colors were fine.

 

On 9/23/2020 at 4:54 AM, Benice said:

  Hide contents

Well crud, I don't even know what to say anymore, since you've already played Berwick. I always say Berwick but... Eh, may as well go with it.

You should play Berwick! It's a danged amazing game!

So I've heard.

...Wait, wasn't my LP what got you to play Berwick in the first place...? What kind of vicious cycle shit is this!?

Indeed I will. When I find the time between dying in Cog of Destiny, mountains of Math and trying to sleep more than  an hour a week.

Jikes...

Nice. I wonder if that effects the out of combat skill growths, or if it's totally different?

There's a formula. You can find it in the "calculations" section for Berwick Saga here in Serenes.

True, I always try to spread it around, but sooner or later one unit ends up doing much of the heavy lifting. It was actually Ruby in this run! Well, in the earlygame. Enid carried hard for a few chapters, (she got to level 22 without me even looking!) and Estie did some huge damage once trained. It wasn't actually that hard to use him, since his base skill of 22 his quite good.

I see... I'm not sure who's done the most heavy lifting in my team. Sylvis, maybe?

No, it's got to be Derrick.

Oh, that's funny, actually! I didn't notice that.

It totally happens!

Eh, I would have gone with Sophie or Faye, but Ruby allows me to have a Morshu reference in my name.

Hah! Well, that's fine.

I was mostly using her 'cause she was really bad.

And now she's not.

It takes real talent to be a bad unit in Three Houses.

Probably...Or maybe they could have pushed back the release date for a few months? It could have been budget, though.

They already delayed it like three times. Probably couldn't afford to do it more times. What the game needed was less unnecessary content. Like Claude. And... And Claude.

Indeed. I swore that he'd land the final blow on Nemesis. I thought that going with two really awful units would make the game hard...

That said, Lorenz's paralogue was fantastic. I truly enjoyed that one, easily one of the better maps I've played as of late.

Oh yeah, the paralogues are by far the best part of Three Houses. The most inventive maps, and also the most challenging. A shame about everything else.

I'm of the mind that good backstory =/= good character. There's plenty of characters with no backstory who are very strong, (Eliwood, for example) and characters with very simple backstories who are equally good. That's probably why I don't like much of the cast of Three Houses- a lot of them are Backstorybots. Like Bernadetta. And Sylvain. And Felix. Because why wouldn't the edgy swordlord be the best unit in the game.

Well, not sure if I'd go that far. I think there are plenty of characters in Three Houses that have great backstories and are also great characters. Even some of the ones I don't like, I have to admit they're well written. A good backstory only helps a character.

But then there's someone like Bernadetta, who goes through the same arc in every single one of her supports, and never seems to truly develop or change at all. Add to that her blatant waifu-bait personality, and you've got an absolutely infuriating character. The backstory seems to just be there to add artificial depth to this otherwise completely flat character.

The worst part is when people dismiss characters like Leonie because "hurr she only ever talks about Jeralt", even though that really only happens when she's talking to Byleth (which makes sense, they're Jeralt's offspring after all). How ironic it is that people would dismiss characters like Leonie and Cyril after seeing a tiny part of their  characters, but will scream at you to READ ALL OF BERNADETTA'S SUPPORTS AND DIALOGUE AND EVERYTHING before daring to criticize her character?

...Lastly, I don't understand everyone's fixation with Hilda. She's got nothing. She barely has a backstory beyond "yeah my offscreen brother's kinda cool", she barely has a personality, and her only character trait is that she's a manipulative cunt. But I guess she's got boobs, so everyone loves her. That seems to be a bit of a trend, doesn't it...?

Feel free to defend Hilda in the replies, everyone. As always, I might be mistaken.

Huh. Haven't made it there yet, but we shall see.

Trust me, his war design is awesome.

Also, I'm getting serious warning flags that Jeralt will die. I'm calling it now. I sorta doubt that it'll be well-done, though, since Byleth seems to have basically no emotional connection to his pops.

Well, you'll see.

WHY IS THIS THE UNIT WHO DOES THIS:

IF IT WERE SOMEONE WHO I LIKED, I WOULDN'T MIND SO MUCH, BUT NO! IT'S THE ONE WHO'S MINAS-TIER EVIL!!!!!!!!

No...No, that's too far. Even Lys isn't that bad.

Minas!? Are you fucking kidding me?! She's a Volcens-tier cretin! I swear all she ever does is lash out at people, and the amount of apologies she gives is exactly zero.

And I'm also sad because even as a fighter she's been really good. I can't believe it...

But I know who I'm hiring to give her flowers for her birthday, and it is a certain lady knight with Raijin arrows and a Gastraphetes.

Pfft!

speaking of lady knights, in chapter 11 there's that one lady knight with a portrait for no reason. I...I went through Heck and back to attack her, but no battle quote or anything. Is she part of someone's character arc, or did Kaga just add that in to lure naive souls like me?

Ahahahah... I asked Aethin back in the day. He... had nothing, either. She's a mystery.

It is satisfying.

Burroughs.

Ah, I actually just got Fritz to go on the wrong side of the river. And He was in prime position to get him! Until Assassin said no.

Oh. Well, that's pretty awesome.

Guuuhhh!

F

Did Marcel even see combat once here?

Yes. Enough for a level, too.

Oooooooh...Hah. I always wondered if there was a reason for this.

There you have it.

Oh. Marcel did do something.

Even got a level! Only 2 more and we're there.

According to Kaga's notes, Perceval and Enid actually did try to hook up with Enid before her promotion event, but Perceval missed and ended up in Alex's bar.

I don't know what makes me laugh the hardest: the hilarious dig at Percy or the fact that Enid apparently tried to have a threesome with herself and Perceval. And Perceval missed, so she ended up with only herself! How does that work?

Nah, neither Devil in the Valley nor chapter 10 should pose huge threats to an archer. Then again, with all the hidden enemies in both...

I'm scared.

Also, Yalong is evil.

I can't even remember who that is... But I'm sure I will once I see him.

Please. It'll take up all the luck you have saved up just to have Percy hit!

True enough...

Marcel is a savage 12 year old. I wonder if Cecily knows that he's this spicy.

I mean, does she know he called her "loose woman" and initially refused to go rescue her from slavers?

 

 

On 9/23/2020 at 7:01 PM, Spara said:

  Hide contents

It definitely could be worse, but it's infuriating nonetheless. Plus, at least we get to make "welcome to the party, pal" jokes in spite of ourselves. That's kinda fun.

At least there's that.

It's already happening. Now your Faye is gonna be strength-cursed for the rest of the game. Sorry. 

What!? No, don't say things like that!

I think this dialogue is written this way to say that the springalds will appear 10 turns after the turn this dialogue appears, not 10 turns after the map starts. I think that's why they just kinda did nothing on turns 10 and 14, and they started coming out on turn 15 which (I believe) is 10 turns after this convo.

That's makes sense.

If Sylvis bites the dust (god forbid, she's great), you can stack this with killer arrows and triple shot on Sherlock and pray to the RNG gods against Thor.  quit Berwick Saga and go LP Mario Golf.

Yes, I agree, that would be a good idea.

Speaking of whom, how many units are gonna die to him? After the Elbert escapade, I'd guess at least another one.

Do I even dare to confront Thor? Maybe it'd be wiser to just leave...

All jokes aside, pretty sure Enid will almost kill him, then Perceval may be able to deal enough cheap damage to finish him off. When if Perceval fails, Enid can finish him off next turn.

If I lose Enid, I'll probably just have to skip the whole encounter.

A word of warning: if you don't kill Thor a few turns after you discover him, he'll leave the cave. Learned that the hard way in my ranked run, where I saved just as Volo and Czene were trying to escape and, right on my turn save, the bastard came flying out. They survived, but Czene had to play a very deadly game of cat-and-mouse. 

I am aware of this, but thanks anyway.

Who needs a translation? The r/FE discord's kagasaga channel has been pretty active in HSoS discussion as of late, and AggroIncarnate's spreadsheet is pretty nice. 

I guess, but... Dude, Vestaria I ended in like ten thousand cliffhangers! I want resolution, damnit!

In all seriousness, I really want to see what happens next in the story. Zephgarus has some videos of a very, very rough translation going through chapter 15 or so, which gives the general idea, but VS1's great writing really pulled me in. 

I knew about Zephgarus, but he's currently not continuing the thing.

God, I love this kind of thing. It's a fun little temporary bonus, and I'm glad that Kaga stuck with his good ol' jank in future games. Apparently HSoS has some stuff ripped straight out of or inspired by Berwick, like the Cavalry Lance not being able to counter/be countered or a playable thief with Canto. 

Stick with his good ol' jank? Heck, I'd say there's more jank in his following games! Berwick Saga is probably the least janky game he ever made. And it has its fair share, so... yeah. Kaga is the jankmaster, is what I'm saying.

Ah yes, one of the units who actually gets worse when promoting. Lances don't mesh well with Adel's kit, the stats are kinda negligible, and losing LtCav movement hurts. Plus, I think his unmounted movement type also changes from Infantry to Knight, which further hurts on maps like 14-m. He's still one of my favorite units to use because vantage-tanking is so fun, but the promotion's pretty stupid. 

Wait, what? I was not aware of this!

Well, unfortunately, he's my last hope for a lance user, and I like lances, so... Yeah.

For variety stuff, I'm gonna throw in some music and other stuff I've done recently.

Go right ahead.

Music: I've been listening to some of Neil Cicierega's mashups lately. If you don't know who he is, you might know of the Harry Potter Puppet Pals or the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. This track probably gives the best idea of his work: 

Pfffft... That's pretty good.

FE stuff: been doing a randomized FE10 run. Some fun stuff includes a STR/RES capped Cat Micaiah, a GK Nolan with 30 more STR/SKL/DEF than RES/SPD (made the caps for each tier 30/40/50), and Sentinel Heather with like 45 speed. When I finish, I might do FE12 blind. I played FE3 book 2 over a year ago, finally am getting around to this one. 

Please do! FE12 is my favorite FE. Which, of course, doesn't include KagaSaga or fangames, but hey. It's a pretty great game, if you can look past the avatar's avatarness, the rather meh story and the same turn reinforcements.

 

7 hours ago, BrightBow said:

It's just that the tournament scene made it very easy to record her idle. It's a lot harder during actual gameplay where you need the help of an enemy with an intro quote.

That's true.

And Sylvis doesn't have much of an idle. Her cape just moves ever so slightly.

You could always make a gif of her Aim/Deadeye animation. That's pretty awesome.

 

Flintstones:

Spoiler

Last time, it was the first time in eons that a map went well, in one of the longest updates to date. Today, we excuse Tianna in one of the shortest updates to date.

Lord Reese, a courier has just arrived with news that your knights have successfully captured the base.

I see... Did they run into any other issues after the battle?

None, milord. The Imperial soldiers who had been coming to reinforce the base have retreated to the front line.

Ah, so my guys have been doing some offscreen defending, huh? I hope Adel got some offscreen spear points out of it...

Good. Tell them that once everything is taken care of, they should return here as soon as possible.

As you wish. By the way, milord, this also arrived with the courier's message...

Hmm... Blueprints?

Hello Crownman. Let us parley.

My apologies for sending you on such a difficult mission, Lord Reese.

You kiddin' me, Corey? It was the best mission in ages! Nobody died! Adel even got a few skill points! Please give us more missions!

I am deeply grateful to you and to the Sinon Knights.

You needn't thank me. It is my subordinates who deserve the credit for their service. Despite the enemy's new weapon, they completed their mission without faltering.

That reminds me, about those prototype blueprints they retrieved... My artillery engineers were utterly astonished, to say the least. They need some adjusting, but if we're able to perfect the design, it could turn the war in our favor...

......

With this, we can use the enemy's own weapons against them!

But we haven't taken the weapon away from the enemy... All that's happened is that both sides have gotten more deadly.

...You have a point there... If all we do is make more effective killing machines, the death toll will likely only rise higher... And yet, without this weapon, I doom my men from the start.

...General...

The men do not matter. Disposable puppets, each and every one of them. Victory is all that matters. If it takes a bloodbath, then in blood we shall bathe.

L-Lord Reese?!

...Sorry. Usually I have Ward to slap me in the back of the head when I start talking like that... Tactician?

Don't ask me to do that! I'm terrified of you! I'm not the Endgame Beard, my defense isn't anywhere near 10 like his! I couldn't tank a hit from you!

......

 

...You've helped me a great deal with everything you've done. Thank you, Lord Reese. I will inform Lord Roswick of your honorable deeds. You are dismissed.

And with that, we add one more horse to our stables.

 

Erzheimer.

Shitty bow Erzheimer.

Moneys Ruben.

Criticize decision readers. Probably.

Devil in the valley... I do not look forward to this. Have I mentioned there's assassins there? Because there's totally assassins there.

Wow, someone's impatient. Reese is barely inside and he's already racing to speak to him.

Oh hey, it's the announcer of Ruby's tournament! He's also... named after an American oil tycoon from the past century, for some unfathomable reason. But at least it's not a nazi higher-up this time, I guess.

I know it's such short notice, but I need to ask a favor of you. Will you hear it?

It sounds like you're in a bit of a bind... What kind of problem are you having, Colonel Rockefeller?

You see, the battle with the Empire gets more fierce every day for us in the Narvian Army. The battles near Remagen river have been especially bloody... Because of the large amount of goods we require, securing a new supply route is curently our top priority.

I see... I've heard passing talk about a new base in the Dania Canyons.

Yes, you are very perceptive! I should have expected no less. We believed the Volpoz Highway would be convenient and efficient for transporting supplies. To that end, we sent an advance party to hold down the area for us... But, we never received a single report from them. Not a thing.

......

Since then, we've dispatched several units, and all of them have vanished or been found dead. It's humilliating... And now, rumors are starting to spread that there is a devil living in the canyon... All of my men are too scared to even set foot near that place... Please, you must help us!

All right, I understand. I will send some knights to take care of the situation.

Thank you so much! I knew I could count on you! Right, I should let you know... There's a reason that people are calling this the work of a devil. It's because when we investigated the corpses of the advance party, we found something rather frightening...

Found?

Second-floor basement?

Yes, that's the assassins at work. We already knew that there's assassins in the map. Or, well, I already knew that.

I've always wondered where you get your information. One of these days you'll have to share your sources with us, Ruben.

Past runs and Serenesforest, mostly. Readers are also helpful.

Come again?

Yes, of course, that makes sense.

...Does it...? Well, anyway...

 

For what I can only assume is a band of thieves, it's extremely strange, wouldn't you say?

Strange indeed... I will warn my knights to take due precaution on their mission.

Or, y'know, you could go with them and confront the assassins with your anti-crit circlet. How about it?

Oki-dokie. That's it. Yeah, sorry, there's not much else. Farewell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To be continued

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban
                        Czene
                        Clifford
                        Elbert
                        Leon

                        Faye x 3

* Unavailable

Capture count: 2 (Daoud, Elbert)

Cripple count: 1 (Perceval)

Reset count: 6 (Reese: 1, Ward: 3, Abus: 2)

 

Current perfect streak: -218 maps

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

 

[Punished Dayni]

Spoiler

9 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! Yeah. It was some great timing. Gotta say, the dig at the fact that I didn't finish the shitty map was uncalled for

  I mean, I wasn't wrong about that statement, though it was harsh on my part.

I've made some progress since (I hate Ailell at present. I'll figure it out). Which also makes me realise my biggest issue with any improvement of 3H: that no matter what, there would need to be a larger scale of assets for any expansion of the story and to allow more maps. And that's just aesthetically, I'm not even discussing map design here.

10 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Maybe so, but aren't there still, like, ten big tiddy Heroes OCs that can win? The likes of... Plumeria, is one of them? Triandra? Freyja? Laegjarn? Laevatein? Mirabillis? You know, those gals that look like they belong in a cheap knock-off gacha scam, not in official Fire Emblem.

I cannot understand the appear of such characters, personally (well, that's a lie - I do understand the two appeals they have, I just don't think it's enough), but last I checked they consistently rank extremely high on the polls. Far above, y'know, real FE characters. I mean, hell, I just checked, and Moody Loli from Heroes got second place in the second poll. What gives?

I'd say the only likely ones are one of the fairy ones next year, there seems to be dropoff after their initial shot at 2nd place.

And yes, I still don't fully get the Veronica shock, although part of it was a backlash against Camilla because the thing is they do a mid-CYL results showcase where they show who's high up and there was a stronger backlash to Camilla and Veronica was a new character to CYL who people felt sorry for because she's a cursed girl who just wants her brother to stoop running the fuck away. Also her brave alt's still a great unit, so I'm not complaining.

10 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

True, true. I made the mistake of considering speaking of involved in the making of FE as if they were one singular entity. It's like KagaSaga - Kaga is the name we all know, but behind these games there's far more people than just him. It's a big issue with the industry as a whole, I feel. Too many people critical to the development of games just don't get the credit they deserve.

...You know, since the subject came up, I'd just like to say - I'd be happy if IntSys stopped handing their games to Treehouse. They have such an awful track record... pretty much every single game they've translated (in this series, at least) is filled to the brim with incoherences, mistranslations and typos. Meanwhile, the guys who did Shadow Dragon were only held back by the relatively barebones script. Imagine Shadow Dragon's beautiful prose with a bigger story like Three Houses's or Radiant Dawn's. Maybe then Claude wouldn't have been terrible!

The curse of the auteur theory for you.

As for the companies involved, this is a fascinating topic. Treehouse have done localisation for most of the international titles, except for SD, Awakening and Echoes, which were all done by 8-4, who are a Japanese based company that got commissioned on those games for whatever reason. Course Treehouse actually did a pretty good job on 3H imo, but I would not complain to see 8-4 again.

As for our opinions on 3H's story, I am not so sure the localisation would be sufficient to fix 3H's issues. And it would likely deviate to some degree to do so.

13 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

With Remagen bridge down, the Lowlands don't count. Aside from Bornia, we also border Liga, but that's mostly a desert nation, not optimal for an invasion. We went there the one map where Enid got her final point of magic, remember?

I was on about eastern borders, but still.

14 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! I wish I understood the joke.

Tales of Phantasia is the first Tales game and the only one I've played at all. I do not like the combat, it is very much an aged title and I an not interested in playing further.

16 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Now I'm picturing you carefully examining every single one of Derrick's battle forecasts to see who's close to him when he gains the 10 hit and 4 crit.

By all means, knock yourself out.

I do not need to.

I won't give my answer, but I'll have my vindication.

Also, has Derrick had a paralogue yet or will he ever?

17 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Kinkshaming, are we? Well, what if it's consensual? Maybe those two are a couple, and they both know that they enjoy that kind of dynamic! How's that?

...Actually, that only makes the way it ended more depressing... and it implies a certain degree of infidelity, so... Yeah. Probably for the best that we don't go with this explanation...

It's not my fault he said what he did.

18 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I imagine the folks over at r/catriasarmpit would like the other image better.

You tainted this pure image of strength.

Also he's male, they wouldn't.

19 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Learn to read, dammit! I clearly said that he couldn't cross the downed fence! As for the rest of the map, well... if Marcel can't climb up cliffs, what chance does poor Burroughs have?

I clearly didn't have that one line sink in.

You'd think there'd be some way to clear the debris.

Stupid question, if you don't pay for Burrough's stuff will he leave?

19 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, the guy's camouflage is great.

Also, I do not get it.

You put the part out on the 21st of September.

The video also came out that day and the song in it's September from Earth Wind and Fire.

21 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...You have a point there... If all we do is make more effective killing machines, the death toll will likely only rise higher... And yet, without this weapon, I doom my men from the start.

That's what you get for trying to make your soldiers more likely to survive by being more effective!

Oh, that's sad.

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, you are very perceptive! I should have expected no less. We believed the Volpoz Highway would be convenient and efficient for transporting supplies. To that end, we sent an advance party to hold down the area for us... But, we never received a single report from them. Not a thing.

......

Since then, we've dispatched several units, and all of them have vanished or been found dead. It's humilliating... And now, rumors are starting to spread that there is a devil living in the canyon... All of my men are too scared to even set foot near that place... Please, you must help us!

That sounds like a cursed place, I wouldn't want to be there either.

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Come again?

Yes, of course, that makes sense.

...Does it...? Well, anyway...

It really doesn't but we need to move on.

25 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Wait he's alive?

26 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm sorry, but to quote yourself:

I mean, I do get the sequence of events, but I thought he died earlier.

27 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Smash that immersion, Harriet.

Help ruin this game for everyone mwahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahaha

I mean, you could sit. This seems like a cheap room with no tables and not even economical because it's a pretty big one bedroom, I don't have a room that big.

DAMMIT BERWICK WHY ARE ROOMS NEVER SMALLER THAN THIS EXCEPT FOR THE BAG ROOM?

28 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So him screwing up has become retrospectively humourous. Least she found a way to not let his actions get to her.

I'm still wondering if his name wasn't you trying to make him an author character of some sort. Clearly far from 1:1, but a sort of mirror image perhaps? A "there but for the grace of reason/intrspection go I" kind of deal (I hated retooling that MLK quote).

I could be overthinking it though, it's harder to think that since he went full villain.

29 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Did Elaine just friendzone her?

That or is this going to end up Sappho and her Roommate style where publicly there was no way they got to let the gay flag fly?

29 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Grazed her- HER EYE GOT TAKEN OUT!

That's some grazing she got!

And yeah, graced is the wrong word there, it sounds like she got a hand softly touching her. Like Harriet wants to do right this second-

31 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Or not, because she was not ready for that. It's been two weeks, she was this close to it.

And apparently turnabout's fair play after all.

This series now passes the 4chan test of being fake and gay

 

 

31 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait Esteban lives?

Did you plan this since Christine died?

32 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, he knows he's going to hell, might as well dig down.

32 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Esteban revealing he secretly had magicbane all along.

33 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't remember him time travelling

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Either Ruebhen is actually going to die or he's getting a Gharnef makeover.

Hopefully he'll realise turning into a red anger ghost is just unappealing.

So, we're on a shorter update, no wonder you doubled down on story.

Here if counties keep getting pushed up the lockdown scale, we're going to get a full on lockdown. Doesn't matter for my course, but that'd suck for a lot of things. Like everyone getting off their lawns. Screw it, I've got no updates, it's late, goodnight.

Aside from Microsoft buying Zenimax, that's probably a generation defining play even if they actually allow multiplat titles.

[Hanes]

Spoiler

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

For those of you who don't care about the fanfic, this might be the shortest update to date. How interesting, given it follows what's perhaps the largest update to date. So yeah. Just a heads up.

Huh alright, well I like the fanfic. Let's see what happens .

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Part 66 - Robber general.

The title reminds me of the thieftaker general, it was basically a thief in charge of London's police force but he was the big boss so he knew where all the thieves were and posed as being really good, instead of, y'know, corrupt.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Back in June, they told me I should apply for the course in September, for a number of reasons that do not include failing the last year (I actually did quite well). Then in September it turns out they have to cut the extraordinary spots due to management problems with corona. So I was left twiddling my thumbs.

At least I got this laptop out of it. It runs better than my last computer, and I get to take my games to places!

hehehe... nice.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Roobin? That's not even how you say my name...! You of all people should know!

Well read it like an english speaker. Roo is in spanish like Ru and bin as in trash bin is like more a combination between an i and an e, so it is passable for Ruben.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Makes the whole world blind.

- Mahatma Ghandi (maybe)

 

But I win, so it's worth it.

- Ruben "Saint Rubenio" Fernandez

Fernandez? Heh, queda bien lel.

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That'd be interesting. But how would you tune out annoying people then?

Just don't open you mind, I'm thinking you can open to receive neuro-electrical transmissions or not.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Seven Deadly Sins... Isn't that the one with the giant waifu and redhead Ned Flanders that's absurdly powerful?

HAhahaahahahah! Yes that is the one. I like the story tho, it's really good. Though it is "haha funny horny" at times

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, then next time I'll call you by your name: Heinz.

Sorry

hehehehe.... ah well, at least you got the pronunciation (if you read in in spanish mode) right. Wait I probably already told you once.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually... Well, on the off-chance that you care about spoilers for that game, I'll put it in a box:

I read them, that's interesting...

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That... wasn't my BWS portrait collection, actually. That was the portrait dump Aethin generously sent to me when I told him I'd be LPing Berwick Saga. It's all the portraits in the game (including unused ones that I occassionally use for my things), but it does not contain any of my own making.

Ah I see... well props to Aethin then.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You don't sound 12, though. Slightly nasal voice in the video, but nothing too embarrassing, I'd say.

Idk... I've never been fond of it... I still feel too young with it.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, the video is hidden, but that's kinda useless when it is also featured on your channel's front page.

Ok I need to know asap how to take it off. Let me check actually, I can't procrastinate on it... ok that was easy enough I think, is it still there? (also watch my other stuff it's good if I do say so myself)
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCE0FcGhQ2C8t8wLNnx_RAAg?view_as=subscriber

Quote

Scratch is pretty cool. Nifty little learning tool.

See if I were to use it again, I would need to relearn some of it but I remember I abused variables. Stuff like "Check if Animatronic_01 is up" and then I had sth else that lead to a message "Animatronic_01 up"being sent and I could go from there. I have other nifty proyects in my scratch stuff, they were... well very novice to say the least, one of them I fucked up and never fixed. The other was an RPG battle system and all it did was roll between some numbers I set it to. Lel

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's the most infamous tutorial song from the early 2000s. You, I and every other kid from our generation has heard it.

Well I'm sad to admit no I didn't hear it then that much.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ouch... Well, I won't pry. I'm sorry I made you bring it up.

Nah it's fine

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

My condolences. My dad and I have never seen eye-to-eye when it comes to our likes and dislikes, but he's been a good dad and we are in good terms. Can't complain, in that respect.

I wish I had something like that...

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That sounds cool. Though I'm busy replaying Sun God's Wrath. Not sure what to think about the fact that I considered replaying a number of FEs, including my supposed favorite FE12, but ended up going for the fangame. Seriously, I love that game too much. Such a fun FE. Unless you're one of those guys who plays for the story only, then I don't imagine you'll enjoy it as much as I do.

Haven't tried it out actually, I may sometime I guess.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, well, if we count that, I've "played" FE4, too. Never made it past the first castle. In fact, I don't think I ever made it far enough to recruit friggin' Quan and company. But I've played it.

Quan is like, turn 3 tho lol. Even if you don't like FE4 because beeg map and whatnot (which surprise! I disagree with that rhetoric) I mean it was soon enough lel.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Haha Boi is in love with Seliph.

You know, there's plenty of fish in the sea but I don't have a good net. So go for fishers instead

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, Claude's biggest scheme in 3H is "I hope that Teach cures Dimitri of his Edginess so they may come to rescue my ass from the Empire." Not even kidding.

Yeah lol. Or how he attacks you at gronder because some messengers died (not his iirc) so idk what the fuck gives.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

As somebody who doesn't speak japanese, I think it's important to change the names to a certain extent so they look like names to westerners. Of course, you shouldn't chance something like "Bartholomew" to "Joey", but Gozewarosu is just... no, that doesn't look like anything. Gorzevalus is close enough that it makes sense as a translation, while also looking like a plausible old-timey name. Even though I'm pretty sure it isn't.

It actually surprises me. For the longest time I thought it was some sort of ancient name that nobody uses anymore, maybe a ye olde version of "Gonzalo" or something, but I googled it and the only results are Berwick-related. Huh. There's also a couple of unrelated images from this LP, and... fucking Arknights memes. Arknights memes. When googling Gorzevalus. Thanks, Golb. You ruined Gorzevalus. Good job.

Yeah makes sense what you say. Though I don't speak it, I can just read katakana, which isn't even most of the japanese alphabet. also damn it golb smh

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The difference is that in Berwick you spend one turn moving. In Gaiden you spend one turn fighting.

...Okay, maybe not, but-- Berwick is still a damned masterpiece, and that's final, goddamnit!

Yeah I was being sarcastic, even then tbh if you try to kill things with alm by warping him, you're gonna take way longer than 1 turn because of dumb misses or not being able to fight everything, etc. Just a heads up.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait, what? Where did this come from? Did you quote the wrong thing...? Are you high? You're high, aren't you?

I saw it plain as day, you did the Bwahahaha laugh. Don't try anything funny, I've got you.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I am kinda slow in general, to be fair. Though these days I've become a bit ballsier in my strategies, when I'm not Ironmanning. The risk of losing people forever is just too terrifying.

I see, I enjoy moving fast, I think it's cool and it just makes it more exciting for me.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Did you just insult my waifu? Those bombs cannot arrive soon enough.

Well Mr, I don't see her horse, or her one-two, or her double-shot... kye he he he...

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...No. It's a... a reference to the ancient video I shared. Berwick takes place hundreds of years after TRS. The connections are small at best.

Oh a.... heheh... uhm.... yeah.... err.... yes... no. Fuck. Piss... uhm 10x2 is 20 right? Well did you know if we multiply 20 by 7 we get 140. Then divide that by 7 and you get 20, that's really cool. But divide 20 by 4 and you get 5, then multiply 5 by 2 and you get 10 and we're back at the start.

Also okie I see.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait... are you saying... you enjoy updates more... when I don't suffer?

You've gotta be the first.

...Nah, actually most people (Butterman notwithstanding) do seem to enjoy my victories more. For some reason.

Cause that's fun.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Especially when his base movement is 3.

Ewww!

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, so my guys have been doing some offscreen defending, huh? I hope Adel got some offscreen spear points out of it...

You know, if FE is giving us this off-screen bullcrap, we better be getting off-screen goodies.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...General...

The men do not matter. Disposable puppets, each and every one of them. Victory is all that matters. If it takes a bloodbath, then in blood we shall bathe.

L-Lord Reese?!

...Sorry. Usually I have Ward to slap me in the back of the head when I start talking like that... Tactician?

Don't ask me to do that! I'm terrified of you! I'm not the Endgame Beard, my defense isn't anywhere near 10 like his! I couldn't tank a hit from you!

......

inb4 Reese isn't a sociopath. He's just possesed or sth.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Moneys Ruben.

Criticize decision readers. Probably.

Erzh-no I'm not doing this again.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh hey, it's the announcer of Ruby's tournament! He's also... named after an American oil tycoon from the past century, for some unfathomable reason. But at least it's not a nazi higher-up this time, I guess.

I know it's such short notice, but I need to ask a favor of you. Will you hear it?

Heh, Rockefeller... who was the nazi higher up tho? Did I miss him?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, that's the assassins at work. We already knew that there's assassins in the map. Or, well, I already knew that.

I've always wondered where you get your information. One of these days you'll have to share your sources with us, Ruben.

Past runs and Serenesforest, mostly. Readers are also helpful.

Come again?

Yes, of course, that makes sense.

...Does it...? Well, anyway...

Heath.png Do you know where the Tactician is from Reese?

 Spain.

Heath.png Do you... know where that is?

Fuck no.

Heat.png It's... gonna be hard to explain...

Reese watch your mouth please or I'll tell your dad.

Heath.png Bruh.

 Dude. Not cool.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Lol this guy? Heheh

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

 

romance? in my fanfic? never...

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

pfft, the funny thing is I have an acquaintance with a pfp of esteban lol. seeing him here surprised me lol.

 

 

[Spara]

Spoiler

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Do I even dare to confront Thor? Maybe it'd be wiser to just leave...

All jokes aside, pretty sure Enid will almost kill him, then Perceval may be able to deal enough cheap damage to finish him off. When if Perceval fails, Enid can finish him off next turn.

If I lose Enid, I'll probably just have to skip the whole encounter.

It's possible to just have someone run in, grab the Raze Etoile, and run out. Though, I relied on a promoted Czene to evade Thor while Volo ran away, so that may not be feasible. Plus, since I'm pretty sure Thor has crit, yeah, it might be a good idea to just run.

Also, if Enid dies, have fun with all the armors/gigas in 15. Speaking of which, I'm curious - how has 15 been for you on your previous runs? Took me like 45 turns my first time, but my most recent attempt was only 19. That map is scary.

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Wait, what? I was not aware of this!

Well, unfortunately, he's my last hope for a lance user, and I like lances, so... Yeah.

I really don't know what Kaga was smoking when he decided to make Adel basically worse from a promotion that's crazy hard to get. Greatlance Adel is a meme I'd like to see, at least.

 

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Pfffft... That's pretty good.

Neil's music is fantastic. He has 3 albums of mashups and weird stuff like this, all of which are really good. I'd absolutely recommend you listen to them in some free time - each are about an hour long and have some genuinely incredible songs in them.

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Sorry. Usually I have Ward to slap me in the back of the head when I start talking like that... Tactician?

Don't ask me to do that! I'm terrified of you! I'm not the Endgame Beard, my defense isn't anywhere near 10 like his! I couldn't tank a hit from you!

Now I'm curious as to the Tactician's actual stats - would his defense be infinite because he has control over all the playable characters and technically exists beyond the game's universe, or zero like all the other civilians in the game's files?

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Devil in the valley... I do not look forward to this. Have I mentioned there's assassins there? Because there's totally assassins there.

At least all of them are not-so-inconspicuously hidden in the only bushes on the map. Especially since you have Larentia around to help out. 

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Or, y'know, you could go with them and confront the assassins with your anti-crit circlet. How about it?

At least it'll be useful in Heretic God. The real question is, was it worth the lives of his family?

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

besteban nooooo

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I haven't been following the fanfic much, but didn't he get the spell a few updates ago? 

you can't win against valerius guenchaos chaos black knight gharnef

On 9/24/2020 at 7:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I swear to god if Arina shows up in this fanfic

Not much chill update stuff today. Been busy, dealing with some somber stuff here in the States. Considering how often American news seems to pop up even if I'm trying to look at world news, you might know what I'm talking about. I'll probably have more humor/jokes next response. 

[Benice]

Spoiler

 

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Wait, wasn't my LP what got you to play Berwick in the first place...? What kind of vicious cycle shit is this!?

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

There's a formula. You can find it in the "calculations" section for Berwick Saga here in Serenes.

Nice.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

They already delayed it like three times. Probably couldn't afford to do it more times. What the game needed was less unnecessary content. Like Claude. And... And Claude.

Ah, true enough. I hadn't played FE until...Well, mid-october, I guess. I missed the buildup to FE16 entirely.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, not sure if I'd go that far. I think there are plenty of characters in Three Houses that have great backstories and are also great characters. Even some of the ones I don't like, I have to admit they're well written. A good backstory only helps a character.

Certainly. I guess I'm just mad about Felix, the edgy myrmidon being the best FIUGAYDVSHB BEST UNIT IN THE GAME AGAIN

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

The worst part is when people dismiss characters like Leonie because "hurr she only ever talks about Jeralt", even though that really only happens when she's talking to Byleth (which makes sense, they're Jeralt's offspring after all). How ironic it is that people would dismiss characters like Leonie and Cyril after seeing a tiny part of their  characters, but will scream at you to READ ALL OF BERNADETTA'S SUPPORTS AND DIALOGUE AND EVERYTHING before daring to criticize her character?

If it's any consolation, I like Leonie too...

Then again, I'm the one who unironically thinks that axes are good in FE6 and that Eligood is the best FE7 lord. Maybe it's not a consolation.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...Lastly, I don't understand everyone's fixation with Hilda. She's got nothing. She barely has a backstory beyond "yeah my offscreen brother's kinda cool", she barely has a personality, and her only character trait is that she's a manipulative cunt. But I guess she's got boobs, so everyone loves her. That seems to be a bit of a trend, doesn't it...?

Duh! It's the same case for Oliver. One note and manipulative, but his gorgeous-yet-lewd design is too appealing for most humans to dislike him.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Trust me, his war design is awesome.

I actually like his pretimeskip too, actually.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Minas!? Are you fucking kidding me?! She's a Volcens-tier cretin! I swear all she ever does is lash out at people, and the amount of apologies she gives is exactly zero.

Lysithea has killed me fewer times...Even considering every time I read her supports.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahah... I asked Aethin back in the day. He... had nothing, either. She's a mystery.

Kaga's version of waifubait.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't even remember who that is... But I'm sure I will once I see him.

Supporter archer in 10's main mission. The one who crippled Elbert while he still had 17 HP left.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't know what makes me laugh the hardest: the hilarious dig at Percy or the fact that Enid apparently tried to have a threesome with herself and Perceval. And Perceval missed, so she ended up with only herself! How does that work?

Well, Perceval's...Dire Thunder...Has only 60% hit, right? No wonder he missed.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

I mean, does she know he called her "loose woman" and initially refused to go rescue her from slavers?

No man, it's a strat! Y'know, arriving fashionably late? Make her want you? Yeah, that's what it was.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Arina is saved! Maybe.

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

EAAAAAAAAAGAGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

On 9/24/2020 at 4:05 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

How dare you make Estie join the bad guys, I'll kill you!

Unless he gets to marry Sophie anyways.