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Saint Rubenio

The League shall fall if I'm in control - A bad tactician plays Berwick Saga, Ironman mode!

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Spoiler
45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh yeah, that's exactly it. He had nobody in the entire world to care for him, so he became a friggin' necromancer to speak to the spirits.

I like to imagine that, if Pelleas lives, Almedha got over her obsessive issues and adopted Pelleas after the end of the game, in a healthier way this time. They're both all alone otherwise, and it's not like Almedha's going to get any love from her actual son. Y'know, Mr. "Humans Are Shameless Creatures". Those two deserve better.

  That line tells us a lot about spirit magic, more than we got with Soren (Although part of that was because that was actually a brand on him).

And on Pelleas being adopted by Almedha, doesn't look like she would, I think she goes back to Goldoa and Pelleas would rather be doing stuff in Daein and helping one of the few people who wanted to listen to him. Almedha has her brother as king of the dragons, even if Soren will chase Ike across time and space.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It would've been pretty cool if Micaiah had refused to work with the man who destroyed her homeland. On the other hand, that would've been the perfect opportunity to make her look like the bad guy and have boring Ike hijack the story even more than he already does, so... meh.

I mean, you're right?

Ike needed to be recontextualised for sure, just having someone who can tell him that maybe just up and leaving Daein after conquering it to be taken was a chance not taken and Michiah was right there. He can claim deniability (being that he was a mercenary working for Elincia and wasn't planning the long term fate of Daein) and Begnion likely would have occupied anyway, but it could have underlined Ike being someone who doesn't want to be part of shaping the world and not only set up him fucking off but shown that that doesn't mean things work out for the best as we already saw in Part 1. It would also help centralise Michiah as someone who actually does give a fuck and gives more weight to her as Daein's potential leader after RD.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahh, so it's the browser that's colorblind.

Then... Throughout all these LPs, you've been seeing yellow faces? That's so weird...

Colourblind's not quite it, but it was showing colour differently.

Also, the yellow was with the FE6 sprites, we're probably fine besides.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh my God... The poor horse! Why do you wish dishonor on it? Doesn't it have enough problems, being sat upon by that guy of all guys?

Hey, I didn't wish dishonour, Mushu did.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Indeed, I believe so. Catching Chaos is far more difficult than catching Chaos.

Depending on the context, catching Chaos could be chaotic I suppose, but Chaos is a powerful swordsman who could prove a tougher challenge.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

2nhqjkvj o

He really doesn't look like he actually swings until he's away from Chaos to me, I'm just trying to understand the hit here and not seeing it.

The roll's cool though.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

How long can it take to pick up a couple of swords? He can warp!

He probably can't warp that fast.

We saw Faramir flashstep, somehow I doubt Chaos can move so fast if he got caught by surprise there, much less over the distance it would take to get back to Raze. I also assume the Ringwraith looking fucker then has to go and retrieve the swords, which for all we know could be behind an obstacle course. We also aren't clear how he warps, how much he can do it and how strong it is (Warp Powder was strong, but of course no powder no warp)

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Surprising, isn't it? The truth is, my mother is not spanish, and my father dislikes the church. My grandparents from both sides were opposed, from what I heard, but in the end they didn't cave in, and so I was raised a child of sin.

When I was in elementary school, this one classmate would bully me by telling me I was going to Hell. She also bashed my head against a metal door one time. But I'm the one who's going to Hell, apparently, because I never had water sprinkled on my head. Funny how that works.

Okay. Definitely wasn't the same, much as I arrived at a similar end.

And yeah, kids do the shittiest things, I'm just more surprised they were only that old doing it.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahahahahah... Can't say I get the connection, but this is still a good excuse to reminisce about your glorious Twrysvelian edit.

Name puns, just wanting to allude to the opening being him trying to get the titular item and failing.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I don't think the gods are ever seen in this game (like the TRS gods), so I decided to have a little bit of fun.

So they are just edits.

I dunno, I could have seen them have a one-off convo at the end or something.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I love how you include Herman here.

I'm glad you remember that event. I was a bit worried people would've forgotten and the joke would look weird.

No comment on Chaos's handle?

Veria's spent a ton of time trying to get Raze off her lawn while he blasts bromantic music at her.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

But is Mario Golf controversial?

They do a lotta cocaine in the members bar.

How do you think there's the babies in at least one game? There's no time travel! They are hallucinations!

On the golf course is where they made the deal to do Mario 3 as a stage show (The latter part is canon).

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

All that over a golf match... Couldn't the impatient assholes have waited for things to calm down? If it was so important for them to play golf right this instant... Why couldn't they have played Mario Golf online instead!?

Worse: The offending event was a dinner for after the golf. Doing so while case numbers were rising and after some were involved in sorting out new restrictions just made the event look irredeemable.

And the train is still trying to roll over the commissioner's brass neck. The narrative he's put forward has more holes than several courses, his demeanour is so high and mighty that he's dragging others down by association, he's straight up broken guidances and rules and pretended that it wasn't all that bad and the story has international traction, it could be too much to ignore for van der Leyen.

I can definitely tell it's gotten more than a few heckles raised, the defences in the media are all tacked on and weak, there's pretty much no regular person okay with it as far as I can see and it's a stain on a man who's certainly got others he tries to hide. I'd be concerned the anti-EU nuts would take the opportunity to use it as well, they're not ready for the can of worms it'd open.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Kvbwgecb o...I had heard that Chaos was without his stolen divine blade in hand, so I... I sought him out...

Cjgdvhkf o

Kvbwgecb oYes... Chaos was able to defeat my father, one of the greatest warriors in all of Izmil... How could I possibly defeat him, as inexperienced as I am...? I was blinded by revenge, and I failed to recognize my own weakness...

Again, he has the same name as Disaster Taoiseach and the former minister for U-Turns and Agriculture I guess. I can't take her seriously. At least she realises she's not perfect.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sadly, instant recruitment and promotion was too good a deal. Faye leaves after Altar of Raze, and Faramir with her (but that doesn't matter to us). She will return at the beginning of the next chapter.

I suppose I could've left Altar for last so I could deploy her in the rest of the maps, but at this point I didn't want to risk getting her killed again before I could play her paralogue. She can have her fun after she's been recruited.

She should probably be gone for all of next chapter too, fair is fair.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Esaolkzs o

See, I could've given him the sleep orb just fine, but the brace took priority over the dark mace. Due to Berwick's shenanigans, it's impossible to bypass one item once Erzie lays eyes on it. I want to keep the brace, so I needed to hide it somewhere Erzheimer couldn't see it. That's where Halfmann comes in.

But of course Kaga couldn't just allow you to not show the item.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

3cxl4xfi o...Has something happened? Were you robbed?!

Omvqba8u o

Uedfz3v4 o Egads! I just hope I don't have to get the things back for him...

Erzheimer's paralogue: Find my antique Raze cutlery set. It's been taken by a bunch of raze priests who happen to be passing a wyvern.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Z1vpznqw oAt first, he simply laid in bed from the shock, but now...

3cxl4xfi oNow?

Z1vpznqw oNow he is going all across town from pawn shops to flea markets to buy back his collection. He seems to have gone quite a distance in his efforts... He has not returned here to the manor in several days.

That sounds like him alright.

Probably bribed anyone who'd rob him.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Meoilxpy oWard, I have an idea. Let's dispatch a team to defend this shrine and drive any thieves away. Hopefully, rumors will spread that the temples are now being guarded.

Wait, stop, hold up.

So rather than have a force that could be deployed o defend these shrines, Reese just wants rumour to be used to protect the shrines.

Okay, Reese, you are not helping. The minute they realise the truth that's all of them threatened. Quescria will feel worse!

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oThere's a legendary sword kept in the Shrine of the Forest. As I'm sure you know, Lord Reese, I'm rather fond of swords.

Lgjkwhcy o...No, actually. You haven't had a single scene since you were introduced in chapter 2. As of right now, you don't really have a character beyond "I want to protect women, even though one of them can hide and the other can dodge better than me so I'm the one that needs protection the most".

Prte9f55 oDid you know I love swords?

Meoilxpy o..... No.

Prte9f55 oSure you do! I mention it all the time!

Meoilxpy oWard?

3cxl4xfi oYes my lord?

Meoilxpy oGet the diary, I could swear I've never heard it in my life. Also, Craymer?

Prte9f55 oKramer actually, but what is it?

Meoilxpy oPlease leave.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

9qk5ifz8 o Balmung, in norse mythology, is the sword of Sigurd. It is also known as Gram and Nothung. Sound familiar? Yeah, the game used two of this sword's names for two different blades. And here's the funniest thing: Nothung? It is ALSO used for yet another sword later on in the game. Which means that Kaga did The Last Promise first.

FE has not used Nothung. but I suspect Garm was a Gram corruption, it's wouldn't be the first time.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oSo three years ago, when I turned 14, I ran away from home and joined the mercenary guild here in Navaron.

Lgjkwhcy o Also, his backstory is that he's a child soldier. Amazing. Usually, they attempt to make child soldiers in FE semi-acceptable by making them thieves or mages. But here's Kaga, having this guy murder people by slicing them with sharp blades from the ripe age of 14.

I'm not too surprised, get them fighting while they're young.

Knights had their squires training at that age, though they'd usually not be on the front lines at 14.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oYou simply don't understand... General Ward, what could be more worth risking my life than love?

3cxl4xfi oLove... for swords... You're right. I don't understand at all...

Prte9f55 oWhat is love? (Love Love)

Swordie don't hurt me, don't hurt me

No more

(Bangs head for 20 seconds)

Meoilxpy oPlease go.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Ro0uxtme o

Anyway, that's the dialogue dealt with. First step, craft the Tabarzin. Tabarzin is less accurate than the Mjölnir, and it cannot do quite as much damage, but it has a bit of crit and, more importantly, the brave effect. In the right hands, this will be quite the asset.

Axel axcends.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Copjg1au o...Surely it couldn't have been Him... H-He acted nothing like how he's depicted in the sacred scriptures... I must've hallucinated that whole encounter... Yes, that's it... Between the bad air and my injuries...

Ugg0cmtj oKeep tellin' yourself that. Makes no difference to me, long as you stay faithful! Say, do you know any good pick-up lines? Methinks mine are pretty rad, but they don't ever seem to work on her...

Ugg0cmtj oThough I suspect I should probably ask someone else what suggestions they have, considering you aren't getting any experience in prison.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
0lfqumuf oHizbot2n o

So they let themselves get trapped in the cave when they know Pretzel's after only them.

REALLY RESPONSIBLE PARENTING THERE.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Yqnrh19v oW649zjfs o

Ruebhen teleports behind them. Are we sure he's low power?

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
H4i48wyp oPyuiecjl o

Pretzel gets out a deckchair, it's not like he needs much else.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Iyhd66yj oEbu2reqq oYdwkbyts o6pvxmomv o

I feel like I shouldn't take schadenfreude from these two being blasted.

Yet here we are.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Itfaxdto oGtyfmjaw o

Elaine, have you converted 10 men and killed dozens of others?

Yeah, don't set the bar too high. Maybe compare yourself to Cecille.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Ply1ljez oWluuzxxq oTqn9zfck oMzfmgzc8 oWajmgx4p oXdb8roau oUzviodsu o8nrpqbjf o

Elaine looking at the stories and then looking at Pretzel:

90dc2c3cd3bc288896a35abd461092b7.jpg

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jtsvwqvj oWxarnxg9 o

Don't mind me, just setting the mood.

OH COME ON! Really? Harriet's the first?

I won't believe it! Why kill Harriet first?

Although I have noticed a certain person has teleported behind Pretzel now. Hmmmm.

School's coming back, but one thing's for sure: No country's handling it well. Least we're not in the... nadir? some other countries are in, but we're far from perfect.

Speaking of not handling things well, 3H! I have been doing not so great on the paralogues, though I feel I just needed to get one over the line and the others have been easier since I cleared one (Just Sword and Shield of Seiros left for the level 17 ones, then I get the next chapter which should be.... fine? I mean I'll have fliers and all.). Honestly,  Hit +20 is S+ tier, unless you're Marianne and have super high charm and still good stats otherwise.

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6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Vnr7otde o......

Kvbwgecb oYou think it would be easier for you to respond to questions if you write the answers down or...

Vnr7otde o   ...

Kvbwgecb oAlright, alright. It was just a suggestion.

 

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Gvj2an9m o

Uh, never noticed the oil lamps go on too.
Though with the lighting not being changed, it still doesn't exactly feel like night.
 

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Lgjkwhcy o Ward, you need glasses. Can't you see that Kramer is not a young girl? You're only supposed to be a dick to young girls!

Well, I can see why he would be grumpy if someone barged in during the middle of the night and started making demands.

Maybe it would be better if Ward's line specifically mentioned the unusual time of day.
 

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Vmuxllxc o

Kramer's first scene since he showed up and it turns out he is essentially Fighter from 8-Bit Theater. Even got the red hair. Poor guy.
 

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oYou simply don't understand... General Ward, what could be more worth risking my life than love?

Although even Fighter wasn't swordsexual ...I think.

 

Edited by BrightBow

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[Addendums]

Spoiler
On 8/23/2020 at 12:02 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, but why do guns scream "rat"? They aren't loaded with living rats, I hope!

Quote

 

*Insert Bernard getting arrested here*

https://youtu.be/DpLZVgCKo1M?t=4298

(You already know the rest of the story)

 

[Replies]

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA:

Spoiler
11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...See? See?! This is what I meant! Don't bring up Overwatch in my presence. TF2 fans aren't known for their ability to stand Overwatch's existence.

What about Fortnite?

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh right, that's a thing. I take back the "why". But she still looks ridiculous.

To be fair, that collection of .gifs do an awful job at showcasing SS's abilities: Barbed Clawhook looks like a generic melee attack when it's actually a ranged pulling attack just like Rope's and Cliffheart's 1st skill (though it slows the enemy instead of applying bonus damage) while Telescopic Net looks like a single-target pulling attack when it's actually an AOE one (whereas Rope's and CH's would pull up to 2-3 enemies in range)

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jesus, get some sleep, man. It's no good to be tired.

Tell that to the maintenance workers cutting the public grass right outside my window every morning since i've come back: they could have done it anytime in the past 2 weeks but noooo, they just had to wait for me to return home AND need sleep to begin...

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That still looks like fun. So it's an okay ability to have.

It indeed is.

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...May I ask why the comment section in that page is a political cesspool, though...?

Because the page itself sorta is...?

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... I love how spanish is always associated to Mexico nowadays, even though it originated here in my homeland.

Ironically, it seems Japan had a very hard time understanding the difference between Italy and Mexico too, at least judging from old anime series (though we kinda DO have the same flag...)

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Then again, I suppose it's true that most Americans don't know Europe isn't just one big country to the left of Russia...

They can't even tell the difference between grated cheese and sawdust anyway, so...

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So the Taunt Fairy is just... the Commentator Fairy.

Not sure what that's supposed to mean, but she and Airstrike are by far the best general-use fairies in the game anyway.

(And they are both surprisingly cheap and easy to get too)

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I see the 1000 episode count and I just... no, thanks, I don't have the time.

What sets Gintama apart from every single other long-running anime series (apart from actually being good) is that it's almost entirely made of self-conclusive episodes and small arcs (up to 5 episodes for the major ones)

Admittedly, things started going downhill past roughly the 300 episodes mark, with arcs becoming more frequent, much longer and MUCH more dramatic, to the point the anime turned from amazing comedy to generic action/drama with arcs literally taking over whole seasons toward the end, as they wanted to wrap up the story asap and terminate the whole thing: such a pity, but was great till it lasted.

tenor.gif?itemid=8698940

 

11 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A success, for you. We'll see what happens next.

Well, you ALMOST managed it today, but ended up 2 comments short of it and now others have opened the 26th page instead.

0126b07c0889f9786e2a4874b0c99f99.jpg

 

[Bonus]

 

Edited by Golb89

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10 hours ago, BrightBow said:
16 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Vnr7otde o......

Kvbwgecb oYou think it would be easier for you to respond to questions if you write the answers down or...

Vnr7otde o   ...

Kvbwgecb oAlright, alright. It was just a suggestion.

Hehehe lol...

10 hours ago, BrightBow said:
16 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Vmuxllxc o

Kramer's first scene since he showed up and it turns out he is essentially Fighter from 8-Bit Theater. Even got the red hair. Poor guy.

Hey I get the reference but w-wait! Kramer has red hair?????????????????????? I see it as blonde! Well in his portrait that is, unless you're telling me that is red too?!

5 hours ago, Golb89 said:
16 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... I love how spanish is always associated to Mexico nowadays, even though it originated here in my homeland.

Ironically, it seems Japan had a very hard time understanding the difference between Italy and Mexico too, at least judging from old anime series (though we kinda DO have the same flag...)

That's what happens with a US-centered worldview where to the them they got America 2.0 above, and the poor browns living in a dictatorship 2 steps below them (this is hyperbole) of course.

Also Italy and Mexico really have a very similar flag... wait Golb89 you're Mexican?

5 hours ago, Golb89 said:
16 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Then again, I suppose it's true that most Americans don't know Europe isn't just one big country to the left of Russia...

They can't even tell the difference between grated cheese and sawdust anyway, so...

Pfft lol what hahahaha!

Also yeah geography and history are the 2 things the americans know the least., well that and languages.

 

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Seeing as I'm having trouble getting quotes due to issues with the last page crashing the tab, I'll do this up in a quick summary.
I enjoyed the antics with Thaddy, mace guy, and the soldier who wouldn't stay out of the bog despite orders.
If Raze has become an unwanted guest on Mace Guy, does that make him a paRazite?
Kramer and Erzheimer should really start a club. Then again, Erzheimer probably collects clubs.

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2 hours ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

If Raze has become an unwanted guest on Mace Guy, does that make him a paRazite?

hehehehehe good one!

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4 hours ago, This boi uses Nino said:

Close enough.

I wouldn't call getting the wrong one among a grand total of 2 options "close enough", but eh...

 

Also, even more [Addendums]

Spoiler

*Insert Ruben trying to capture an enemy alive here*

a8edaaf1d3e78b613a47be109a982b67e365ee10

 

And here is Halfman's daughter, who inherited all of the junk her father "collected" during his career:

char_2013_cerber_1.png

Maybe.

(Unfortunately i didn't pull her on her banner, so can't directly include any of her quotes yet)

Spoiler

(I didn't actually burn all of my premium currency on her banner: that'll be the case in the next one instead)

 

[Bonus]

(Forgot to post this one in my previous comment, hence why it's here and not below)

 

And a(nother) [Bonus] too:

(Why do i even keep putting these under "spoiler" anymore?)

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Part 58 - Cursed sword.

Ayayayayayayayayay:

Spoiler
On 8/26/2020 at 12:22 AM, This boi uses Nino said:
  Hide contents

Alright, good.

Good indeed.

I was always under the impression that TRS was super good... huh.

Hey, I love it, don't get me wrong. It is a quite flawed game, but it has plenty of strengths:

- An extremely unique playable cast. There's a playable witch (with infinite warp and all), a powerful sniper that joins early but cannot kill humans, a myrmidon with a personal sword that saves him from death (but you might not always want that...), probably the most fun Est in any of these games despite the fact that she's an archer, trainee pegasus knight, a literal friggin' tank... It's great.

- Tons of secrets and decisions that add to the replayability. For example, a four-way Arran/Samson where you get two opportunities to pick between four units. The one you pick in the first choice is replaced by another one in the second, further complicating the choice.

- Plenty of good maps that stand out among the few bad ones, like maps 18, 26B and 24.

- Some amazing story beats and characters in spite of the weaker parts (including the greatest Camus-like character I've seen, beating all the ones in FE by far)

- An army split that I find to be superior to the one in Gaiden, mainly because you actually have to pick which units to send with which lord, and plenty of characters have different events in either route.

These things and probably a few more I'm forgetting right now are why I love the game, in spite of its flaws. Well, them, and... again, the PS1 emulator I use has a great speed-up feature. Dolphin's speed-up sucks, which only contributed to the tedium of playing the Tellius games. I know it's an unfair thing to hold against those games, but the truth is, it's something that they lack that definitely helps make TRS more fun to play.

You's sure's are's new chain?

No's. Please's.

Oh I know lol. Though it looked more wholesome than anything... eh strangely enough.

Ahahahahahah... One of these days I'll have to get around to making the divorce arc for that. With Gotoh as the lawyer.

I completely agree and am an atheist myself. Or well I'm not sure about god himself. Does he exist? Does he not? Well if he shows up one day I'll accept the truth and that I was wrong.

One issue I've always had with the idea of God is... How arrogant do we humans have to be to believe that everything was created by a big man sitting in the sky? Chances are, if there really is a creator, it looks more like a Lovecraftian abomination, the mere sight of which would fry our brains if we were to ever lay eyes upon it.

I never thought I could use Fire Emblem to make an analogy of the church of the real world but you did it, I like it. Yoder also reminds me of the good priests there are. The guys that genuinely believe in god and do it for their community and help other people out, I mean one could argue all their life advice could be the same without god but if they're well meaning and do good what do I care?

Indeed, those priests I quite respect. A shame about... all the other ones.

If you ever play Souls of the Forest, one of the characters there is one of the asshole atheists lol... well I mean there's little writing in the hack but hey! He has his recruitment, the description of his weapons I guess and his escape quote. Though, pardon me for bringing him up, most of my view of him being an active member of r/atheism comes from Mangs' LP where he played him up, probably because there's not much writing yet. Play SotF. You want gameplay? DO IT.

Recommendation duly noted.

Erzhimler was on purpose, I swear! Don't start that chai- *boom* ah! Did you hear that explosion? ...

Ruben: What are you talking about I hear nothing.

Well anyways I hope you donzeimer my *boom... kaboom* I'm seriously hearing something! 

*vietzeimer flashbacks*

"Private Nino, private Nino! Get up, the falsifier Rubinelle have you played Advance Wars Days of Ruin? army is on the attack!"
*the sounds of screeching and explosions and a headache is everywhere*

Ruben: Nino? Hijo mio estas bien?

Hanes: Ah... si, ya... era una mala memoria...

*
*
*

That went... places. Also, I like the reference. I have played Days of Ruin, and though I never got too far for the same reason I've never gotten too far into any Advance Wars (somehow I always seem to get irremediably stuck in endless stalemates), I do get the reference.

(Himler is a real historical figure by the way, I just felt like missing the name on purpose with his)

Whaaa? Really, Himler is a historical figure? I didn't know that! Must be some really obscure guy... It's not as if he was, like, the right hand man of one of the most terrible figures of last century's history! You sure he's not just a Shadow Dragon boss?

And for the rest of the items and shit, I huh... (don't say see, don't say see) view...

Ahahahahah... Excellent.

Haha! Ah quite amusing... so in truth the world accepts both gods, but the cultures differ in whom they believe should be venerated. Cool.

There are more nuances to it, but that's more or less it in a nutshel, yes.

You get TF2 flashbacks...

Not quite the reference I was going for. But it's fine. I wouldn't expect many in this thread to get references to that game. In fact, the box titles from the previous update are also a reference to that one.

That's... a bit sad.

Poor Halfmann has been waiting on his debts for like 5 months now.

Hehehe kraming...

Aren't I witty?

I missed liek 30 updates or so which means it may have already been done, but I want to see an edit of Erzheimer being a libertarian, go with whatever you can ome up with... if you will I mean.

Can't say it's been done. Not entirely sure what you mean with "libertarian". You want me to make an edit with an "evil capitalist" caricature, is that it?

I made the joke before but Ruby is the father of this child and Clifford is a transphobe and why he didn't like his daughter... yeah it's dumb as fuck now that we get the whole character arc and shit.

Hey, your theory doesn't necessarily contradict the joke. Ruby wanted to be a man, but Clifford was a dick and didn't want to let her because if Ruby became Rubio, the last piece of Clifford's wife would become the last piece of Clifford's husband. And that's not what Clifford wants.

All in all, Clifford's still a dick and Ward still beats the shit out of him until he accepts his daughter's wishes.

But the scroll bar still has a lot of space? Fanfiction time?

That's usually how it goes, yes.

Oh and goodbye, but since this is at the end of the next update's replies, Good day Ruben!

Good afternoon, at the time of writing!

I hovered over the images just randomly (wanted to see if the weird angry face had some easter egg), there's a number jump here, from thing_57 to thing_59.

Whoops. Well, these things happen.

The plot advances, I'm still hooked.

Happy that you are!

 

 

On 8/26/2020 at 12:58 AM, Benice said:
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I mean, I wasn't even joking.

No you weren't... Sigh...

Why are you shaking your head? I was shaking mine!

No, you said "smh my head", which means you were shaking your head your head. I was just shaking my head, period.

Oh, sorry. I'll try not to do that anymore.

Do... what? It was my mistake!

Ah heck, that dumb inside joke is still plaguing my spelling to this day!

...It's a really long story, but to put it in a nutshell, we had a teacher that everyone called Rico, (I don't know why) and he became the deity of our school-We built a shrine to him out of papier-macher and electric candles in the gym on the last day. Anyways, everyone always said fanastrico.

I'm... not sure how to feel about the fact that you built a shrine and made up new vocabulary in the name of a teacher. You sure it didn't evolve into a cult by second year?

And you can't even use shaver because I don't have a beard! Ha!

Keep shavers far away from me. I don't want them anywhere near my beard.

Or my hair, for that matter. The portrait is a bit outdated now, because I'm letting my hair grow long. So far I've been... rather unsuccessful. Hasn't even reached shoulder length. Actually, right now my hairstyle looks a lot like Seteth's. Could be worse, I guess.

Very boring-Heck, Marcus being a good Jagen is honestly one of the biggest reasons that I love FE6 HM.

FE6 Marcus? But FE6 Marcus lasts the entire game too! Didn't you know? He kills Murdock with the Durandal! He's better than Perceval!

You don't know who the smurfs/Schroumpftz are? That's sad.

I know what they are, but they never were a part of my childhood at all, to the point where I didn't even know the villain. So yeah.

Lovely!

You quoted the same thing twice.

No chance! I'm waaaay too bad at this game to ever actually play it as Kaga intended.

Although I might. One day.

Ahah, well, it's not about being good at it. It's about the fun!

My first run? Nobody. Every single person I deployed died at some point.

Jikes...

Also, unrelated. What does luck do again? Now that she's capped light skill, Saphira's got Luck levels the last three or four times around.

One point of luck prevents a crippling. Five prevents a death.

This run, only Esteban, Aegina and Faye (On purpose, so she could get happiness) have died. Pretty good!

That's great, I'm happy for you.

Wait, no, Marcel died a whole bunch because of the nimbus axes. Man, I hate those.

Eesh... Yeah, I can see how that'd get rough fast.

Anyways, Imma rant about my current one. Just beat chapter 9's main mission!

  Reveal hidden contents

I promoted Enid in chapter 8, but I RNG abused for it- I'm glad I did, because it took me over half an hour to get enough magic, even with the liquid magic.

Ruby's been an absolute beast-Ten strength, ten defense, tons of speed. Permanently recruited in chapter 6, promoted in chapter 7.

Faye promoted after chapter 6-Still pretty good, but my team sucks a lot less this time, so she's been less useful. Still love astra.

Czene promoted after chapter 6-She's been really good, and I captured a few enemies with good weapons. The Bolt Knife in particular has been amazing, and I love the Thief's charm so much, even though I nearly died getting it.

Reese-Just promoted after (I think?) chapter 9's main mission. Barely used him, to be honest. Gram's still amazing, though.

Esteban! Just promoted in chapter 9! He's been so good! He has something like 21 speed after promotion now, as well as 40 bow skill, about 11 strength, 5 defense... I really like his character too-I find him somewhat relateable (Well, the feeling useless part. He's cool in the other parts of his character too.) I'm not gonna lie, in his first scene with Sophie, when she mistook Arina for being his lover, I was thinking "No! NO! KAGA NO STOP KAGA NO"

I wish he had deadeye, though.

Honourable mentions to Aegina, who OHKO'D Theodore! I was so elated when it happened that I think I screamed. My cats didn't appreciate that. She may promote, as she's hit level 15, but good gravy does she gain skill slowly. Heck, she gains every stat slowly...

This is all pretty cool. Yes, Esteban is a pretty good character, and though he is the worst archer in the game, that doesn't mean he's not a good one (just that his competition is godly-promotion Sherlock, godly-crossbows Christine and godly-everything Sylvis, so he seems a bit underwhelming in comparison). I'm sad I didn't get to show him off, but that's life.

Don't tell anyone but I honestly don't think you're that bad, since you're better at Berwick than I ever will be.

Hah! Well, I'd like to think I've improved with the years, even if I still make my fair share of mistakes. I was horrendous back in FE12 and 6, though. I'm sure if I tried ironmanning FE6 today, I'd do at least a bit better. At least enough that I don't have to rely on friggin' Marcus as my final cavalier and swordsman.

And I'm playing catch-up once more! I'll respond to everything else in a different comment.

[Insert obligatory Canadian apology.]

You do what you can, and no more.

 

On 8/26/2020 at 1:09 AM, Dayni said:
  Hide contents

  That line tells us a lot about spirit magic, more than we got with Soren (Although part of that was because that was actually a brand on him).

Yes, indeed...

And on Pelleas being adopted by Almedha, doesn't look like she would, I think she goes back to Goldoa and Pelleas would rather be doing stuff in Daein and helping one of the few people who wanted to listen to him. Almedha has her brother as king of the dragons, even if Soren will chase Ike across time and space.

Well, maybe her adopting him would be too much, but I'd still like to think that they remain in friendly terms at least. I just don't want Pelleas to be left all alone again, okay? He deserves better than that. I even wanted to let Tauroneo kill him in my run, for the "Tauroneo calls himself King Killer but can't kill Ashnard so he settles for Pelleas" memes, but by the time the moment came I felt so bad for him that I just had to grant his final request.

I mean, you're right?

No question mark needed.

Ike needed to be recontextualised for sure, just having someone who can tell him that maybe just up and leaving Daein after conquering it to be taken was a chance not taken and Michiah was right there. He can claim deniability (being that he was a mercenary working for Elincia and wasn't planning the long term fate of Daein) and Begnion likely would have occupied anyway, but it could have underlined Ike being someone who doesn't want to be part of shaping the world and not only set up him fucking off but shown that that doesn't mean things work out for the best as we already saw in Part 1. It would also help centralise Michiah as someone who actually does give a fuck and gives more weight to her as Daein's potential leader after RD.

This is good, yes.

Colourblind's not quite it, but it was showing colour differently.

All right.

Also, the yellow was with the FE6 sprites, we're probably fine besides.

Hmmm... very well.

Hey, I didn't wish dishonour, Mushu did.

Well, dishonor on Mushu, then!

Depending on the context, catching Chaos could be chaotic I suppose, but Chaos is a powerful swordsman who could prove a tougher challenge.

Hmmmm... Sorry, but as far as I'm concerned, Chaos >>>>>>>>>> Chaos.

He really doesn't look like he actually swings until he's away from Chaos to me, I'm just trying to understand the hit here and not seeing it.

Yes, but...

The roll's cool though.

That's all that matters. Flair > practicality. You should know that. FE is the series where spinning your sword around lets you deal three times the damage.

He probably can't warp that fast.

We saw Faramir flashstep, somehow I doubt Chaos can move so fast if he got caught by surprise there, much less over the distance it would take to get back to Raze. I also assume the Ringwraith looking fucker then has to go and retrieve the swords, which for all we know could be behind an obstacle course. We also aren't clear how he warps, how much he can do it and how strong it is (Warp Powder was strong, but of course no powder no warp)

Yes, this is probably it.

Okay. Definitely wasn't the same, much as I arrived at a similar end.

What's your story, if you don't mind me asking?

And yeah, kids do the shittiest things, I'm just more surprised they were only that old doing it.

Kids are fucking assholes to other kids, and nothing is ever done about it because "boys will be boys" or some shit like that. It's kinda infuriating. Though I suppose school bullying does teach kids a very important lesson: people are horrible.

Name puns, just wanting to allude to the opening being him trying to get the titular item and failing.

Ahhh, of course.

So they are just edits.

More like unused sprite and unused sprite with the brightness turned up a bit. Seriously, the fabulous Raze priest with the pink hair is in the game files. Didn't even touch it (beyond the cropping I apply to all my portraits). I wish they actually used it, he's more gorgeous than you'd imagine a garbage bagman could be. Uh... Owen notwithstanding.

I dunno, I could have seen them have a one-off convo at the end or something.

Nah. Unfortunately.

No comment on Chaos's handle?

I loved it.

No comment on the fact that being in the club of people whose names aren't misspelled puts you right next to Herman?

Veria's spent a ton of time trying to get Raze off her lawn while he blasts bromantic music at her.

What have I done, I've turned them into the protagonists of a sitcom...

They do a lotta cocaine in the members bar.

How do you think there's the babies in at least one game? There's no time travel! They are hallucinations!

Cocaine, huh? Hoo, boy...

On the golf course is where they made the deal to do Mario 3 as a stage show (The latter part is canon).

Ahahahahahahah... If only.

Worse: The offending event was a dinner for after the golf. Doing so while case numbers were rising and after some were involved in sorting out new restrictions just made the event look irredeemable.

And the train is still trying to roll over the commissioner's brass neck. The narrative he's put forward has more holes than several courses, his demeanour is so high and mighty that he's dragging others down by association, he's straight up broken guidances and rules and pretended that it wasn't all that bad and the story has international traction, it could be too much to ignore for van der Leyen.

I can definitely tell it's gotten more than a few heckles raised, the defences in the media are all tacked on and weak, there's pretty much no regular person okay with it as far as I can see and it's a stain on a man who's certainly got others he tries to hide. I'd be concerned the anti-EU nuts would take the opportunity to use it as well, they're not ready for the can of worms it'd open.

Looks like a damn right mess. I hope it gets resolved... decently, at least.

Again, he has the same name as Disaster Taoiseach and the former minister for U-Turns and Agriculture I guess. I can't take her seriously. At least she realises she's not perfect.

Hey, did she at least know how to speak english or, you know, irish? Because that alone would put her above former spanish president Rajoy.

She should probably be gone for all of next chapter too, fair is fair.

No dude. You keep thinking in pre-Berwick Kaga terms.

But of course Kaga couldn't just allow you to not show the item.

To be fair, it's very in-character of Erzheimer to refuse to move on from each item once he notices it. He probably starts snooping about Ward's bag before he has a chance to say "hello."

Erzheimer's paralogue: Find my antique Raze cutlery set. It's been taken by a bunch of raze priests who happen to be passing a wyvern.

Erzheimer's paralogue: Find my one true love, my vase. How I miss its erotic curves...

C O L L E C T O R ' S   H O U S E   B G M   I N T E N S I F I E S

That sounds like him alright.

Probably bribed anyone who'd rob him.

3zxs1rqn oHeheheheh... This is a robbery! Hand over your bag or--

Rbclvnd4 oYes, yes, yes! Here, take this!

3zxs1rqn oW-Whoa...! Holy shit-- this bag, it's so heavy! How much money is in here--?!

Rbclvnd4 oOut of my way! Out, out! I must recover my collection! Quick, before someone else buys it...! Ohhh, what if they've already sold off my wormwood orb!? What a tragedy that would be! Nooooooooo...!

3zxs1rqn o...W-Who did I just try to rob...?

Wait, stop, hold up.

So rather than have a force that could be deployed o defend these shrines, Reese just wants rumour to be used to protect the shrines.

Yes. It... sounds a lot more stupid when you say it like that.

Okay, Reese, you are not helping. The minute they realise the truth that's all of them threatened. Quescria will feel worse!

In fairness, what else can we do? We can't dedicate the rest of our lives to guarding every single temple in the world. We don't have infinite time, and we can't be in 27 places at once! That's something Volcens should deal with. But obviously, the fact that Quescria came to us means that Volcens has been very Volcens about this issue.

Prte9f55 oDid you know I love swords?

Meoilxpy o..... No.

Prte9f55 oSure you do! I mention it all the time!

Meoilxpy oWard?

3cxl4xfi oYes my lord?

Meoilxpy oGet the diary, I could swear I've never heard it in my life. Also, Craymer?

Prte9f55 oKramer actually, but what is it?

Meoilxpy oPlease leave.

Hwahahahahahahah... poor Crayon.

FE has not used Nothung. but I suspect Garm was a Gram corruption, it's wouldn't be the first time.

Not quite the same thing, and Kaga still has the other two names anyway. I'd say he still wins, in the end. It's something like IntSys - 0.5, Kaga - 2.

I'm not too surprised, get them fighting while they're young.

Knights had their squires training at that age, though they'd usually not be on the front lines at 14.

Jesus...

Prte9f55 oWhat is love? (Love Love)

Swordie don't hurt me, don't hurt me

No more

(Bangs head for 20 seconds)

Meoilxpy oPlease go.

I must concur with emotionless man.

Jokes aside, I got the reference. That's right - this song is so famous, even I know it.

Axel axcends.

Hah!

Ugg0cmtj oThough I suspect I should probably ask someone else what suggestions they have, considering you aren't getting any experience in prison.

Oof... Denied by God. That's rough.

...Incidentally, I just made a horrible discovery. It hit me right now, and I just had to check to make sure.

Ugg0cmtj oRnwsddzf o

Uqp5cdmu o

"Raze" is Lane.

...Goodness, now I feel dirty having described the portrait as "fabulous"...

So they let themselves get trapped in the cave when they know Pretzel's after only them.

REALLY RESPONSIBLE PARENTING THERE.

I tried my best to make it clear that at this point they've all lost hope entirely, and just want to avoid unnecessary bloodshed. You know, all of them.

Ruebhen teleports behind them. Are we sure he's low power?

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

He just ran. But that's a fun mental image.

Pretzel gets out a deckchair, it's not like he needs much else.

Nope.

I feel like I shouldn't take schadenfreude from these two being blasted.

Yet here we are.

Ahahahahah... well, that's one way to look at it.

Elaine, have you converted 10 men and killed dozens of others?

Yeah, don't set the bar too high. Maybe compare yourself to Cecille.

Forgive her, she's lost her mind. She doesn't know what she's saying.

Elaine looking at the stories and then looking at Pretzel:

90dc2c3cd3bc288896a35abd461092b7.jpg

Hah! That's so cute!

Don't mind me, just setting the mood.

Eyyy, it's the meme song I never remember! Skrimir in song form... Though now that I've played RD, I actually can remember who Skrimir is. For a while I was convinced Rinkah was named Reina, but that no longer applies either... At this point I'd say it's one of the Fates butlers. I can't ever tell them apart.

...No, wait! It's the one guy, what's his name... The guy from Radiant Dawn, Ranulf's second adjutant! The guy who acts as the voice of reason to Lethe's sister! Kyza, maybe? That guy is so forgettable! He's worse than Tomas! Original Tomas, I mean. The other Tomas is awful for entirely different reasons. The first of which being that he stole OG Tomas's name!

OH COME ON! Really? Harriet's the first?

I won't believe it! Why kill Harriet first?

Well... keep reading, and we'll see.

Although I have noticed a certain person has teleported behind Pretzel now. Hmmmm.

I reiterate my previous statement.

School's coming back, but one thing's for sure: No country's handling it well. Least we're not in the... nadir? some other countries are in, but we're far from perfect.

At least you're not the US. We're in pretty bad shape ourselves, but... at least we're not the US. The US is just... kinda falling apart right now, from what I've gathered.

Speaking of not handling things well, 3H! I have been doing not so great on the paralogues, though I feel I just needed to get one over the line and the others have been easier since I cleared one (Just Sword and Shield of Seiros left for the level 17 ones, then I get the next chapter which should be.... fine? I mean I'll have fliers and all.). Honestly,  Hit +20 is S+ tier, unless you're Marianne and have super high charm and still good stats otherwise.

Good luck with those.

 

On 8/26/2020 at 5:52 AM, BrightBow said:
  Hide contents

 

Kvbwgecb oYou think it would be easier for you to respond to questions if you write the answers down or...

Vnr7otde o   ...

Kvbwgecb oAlright, alright. It was just a suggestion.

E D G I N E S S   I N T E N S I F I E S

Uh, never noticed the oil lamps go on too. Though with the lighting not being changed, it still doesn't exactly feel like night.

They tried. That's good enough for me, I suppose.

Well, I can see why he would be grumpy if someone barged in during the middle of the night and started making demands.

Maybe it would be better if Ward's line specifically mentioned the unusual time of day.

That is true. Well, to be fair, it's pretty clear why Ward's being angsty. I just wanted to poke fun at him for his track record, is all. You're the one who's always doing the same thing!

Kramer's first scene since he showed up and it turns out he is essentially Fighter from 8-Bit Theater. Even got the red hair. Poor guy. 

Although even Fighter wasn't swordsexual ...I think.

I can't say I get the reference, sadly. But this does remind me of a certain scene in Berserk where this woman takes Guts's sword and

...You know, maybe it's best I don't describe the scene, actually.

 

 

On 8/26/2020 at 10:32 AM, Golb89 said:

[Addendums]

  Hide contents

 

*Insert Bernard getting arrested here*

https://youtu.be/DpLZVgCKo1M?t=4298

(You already know the rest of the story)

I... sorry, but it's still difficult for me to take this seriously when one minute we're having this absolutely badass, serious, no-nonsense sequence with Beardman getting arrested, and then suddenly, Yellow Anime Girl with Bandaid on her Nose.

 

[Replies]

  Hide contents

What about Fortnite?

Ah, yes. Fortnite. The trendy game.

That's... the most you'll get me to say about that game. I have successfully avoided it like the plague since it came out. I won't stop now.

To be fair, that collection of .gifs do an awful job at showcasing SS's abilities: Barbed Clawhook looks like a generic melee attack when it's actually a ranged pulling attack just like Rope's and Cliffheart's 1st skill (though it slows the enemy instead of applying bonus damage) while Telescopic Net looks like a single-target pulling attack when it's actually an AOE one (whereas Rope's and CH's would pull up to 2-3 enemies in range)

Ahh... Sounds... uh, good. I think.

Tell that to the maintenance workers cutting the public grass right outside my window every morning since i've come back: they could have done it anytime in the past 2 weeks but noooo, they just had to wait for me to return home AND need sleep to begin...

Clearly they hate you in particular.

It indeed is.

I... was not aware that it allowed you to phase enemies through walls.

Because the page itself sorta is...?

That's kinda terrible, not gonna lie. Wait, but what does the link have to do with what I was talking about...?

Ironically, it seems Japan had a very hard time understanding the difference between Italy and Mexico too, at least judging from old anime series (though we kinda DO have the same flag...)

Quote

Lobelia's sole mission is to have sex with Tomonori, and she has the most sexual aggression.

That is not a sentence I expected to read when I got up this morning.

EDIT: Ruben from the future here! I'm proofreading the update, and I'd just like to say that this still isn't a sentence I expected to read when I got up this morning.

They can't even tell the difference between grated cheese and sawdust anyway, so...

Oh, blistering barnacles, how!? How could this happen...?

Not sure what that's supposed to mean,

It's supposed to mean I don't get it.

but she and Airstrike are by far the best general-use fairies in the game anyway.

(And they are both surprisingly cheap and easy to get too)

I still have no idea what fairies are supposed to do!

What sets Gintama apart from every single other long-running anime series (apart from actually being good) is that it's almost entirely made of self-conclusive episodes and small arcs (up to 5 episodes for the major ones)

That's what my friend told me to convince me, too.

So far he has not succeeded.

Admittedly, things started going downhill past roughly the 300 episodes mark, with arcs becoming more frequent, much longer and MUCH more dramatic, to the point the anime turned from amazing comedy to generic action/drama with arcs literally taking over whole seasons toward the end, as they wanted to wrap up the story asap and terminate the whole thing: such a pity, but was great till it lasted.

tenor.gif?itemid=8698940

To be honest, I have little confidence in my friend's sense of humor, since we mostly disagree in that aspect. I also have little confidence in anime's sense of humor, since for the most part animes have failed to make me laugh ever. But, admittedly, I do have a pretty weird sense of humor. I mean, this is the most hilarious video I've seen all year. This.

Well, you ALMOST managed it today, but ended up 2 comments short of it and now others have opened the 26th page instead.

0126b07c0889f9786e2a4874b0c99f99.jpg

Lucky you, then!

 

[Bonus]

  Hide contents

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/igpoe7/little_match_snowsant_pt2_by_guin/

This is literally just the old fairy tale with an Arknight character. How could anybody hate a character so much that they'd put her in this fairy tale of all fairy tales?

 

 

On 8/26/2020 at 4:03 PM, This boi uses Nino said:
  Hide contents

Hehehe lol...

That was my reaction too!

Hey I get the reference but w-wait! Kramer has red hair?????????????????????? I see it as blonde! Well in his portrait that is, unless you're telling me that is red too?!

Orange. Which, in real life, we call red hair, so... Yes. He's a redhead.

That's what happens with a US-centered worldview where to the them they got America 2.0 above, and the poor browns living in a dictatorship 2 steps below them (this is hyperbole) of course.

It is... a pretty interesting country. I want to believe not everyone who lives there is like this.

Also Italy and Mexico really have a very similar flag... wait Golb89 you're Mexican?

Italian, I'm fairly certain.

Pfft lol what hahahaha!

Another display of humanity at its finest...

Also yeah geography and history are the 2 things the americans know the least., well that and languages.

And humility, in some cases.

 

 

On 8/26/2020 at 8:25 PM, The Roger The Paladin said:

Seeing as I'm having trouble getting quotes due to issues with the last page crashing the tab, I'll do this up in a quick summary.

Shame. Still, thanks for dropping by.

I enjoyed the antics with Thaddy, mace guy, and the soldier who wouldn't stay out of the bog despite orders.

Thanks! I really tried.

If Raze has become an unwanted guest on Mace Guy, does that make him a paRazite?

Ahahahahahahahah... He should do like Veria and get a can of mace spray to protect himself.

Kramer and Erzheimer should really start a club. Then again, Erzheimer probably collects clubs.

He really does, remember the dark mace?

 

On 8/26/2020 at 11:58 PM, Golb89 said:

Nope.

Presto!

Also, here is another [addendum]:

  Hide contents

Honestly, this is just perfect. I can totally see this guy being a whale in gacha games.

 

18 hours ago, Golb89 said:

I wouldn't call getting the wrong one among a grand total of 2 options "close enough", but eh...

 

Also, even more [Addendums]

  Hide contents

*Insert Ruben trying to capture an enemy alive here*

a8edaaf1d3e78b613a47be109a982b67e365ee10

Hah! Yes, indeed that's it.

And here is Halfman's daughter, who inherited all of the junk her father "collected" during his career:

char_2013_cerber_1.png

Maybe.

Goodness... overcompensating much?

 

(Unfortunately i didn't pull her on her banner, so can't directly include any of her quotes yet)

  Reveal hidden contents

(I didn't actually burn all of my premium currency on her banner: that'll be the case in the next one instead)

A shame.

[Bonus]

(Forgot to post this one in my previous comment, hence why it's here and not below)

Hah! That reminds me of a certain Ace Attorney character.

 

And a(nother) [Bonus] too:

(Why do i even keep putting these under "spoiler" anymore?)

A better question is why is all the fanart horny. All of it.

 

Hi:

Spoiler
4pwwr1ei o

Music. Last time we'll hear this tune, sadly.

0nup9exq o

The team. It is not a good idea to bring Derrick, but I want to field him already. Honestly though, Sylvis would've been a much better option, what was I thinking...

H2jwfrjt o

Six enemies? Well, unfortunately, that won't last. Four thieves will come out of the temple and attempt to run to the escape point. They'll all be carrying valuable treasures, so we want to stop them. Also, these enemies are deceptively strong. The axeman below the temple has a dark axe (Erzheimer item), Counter and Adept; the priest to the south has sleep, there's a hidden archer with multiple special arrows... It won't be so easy to catch the thieves if we want to remain unscathed.

Now, you might be thinking: Ruben, why don't you just block the escape point with Larentia, like back on the boat?

Bttw0mxy o

Well, this is why. Yeah. I don't want to confront this.

Bim8jpco o

Let'sa go.

Srdfni9v oA04mpdu5 o2du8kfow o

Meet Verda, Shagaal and Uriad. Can you guess who's the leader here?

Hcgs4dkx oI've got it right here. The plaque said it was the holy sword of Alcyone, you believe that?! With a haul like this, we'll be able to live easy for the rest of our lives!

9qk5ifz8 o If they last longer than a couple hours. Which isn't likely.

295qr1h0 o
 
Dbvjlugj o

Prte9f55 oWe can't allow them to escape! Even if it costs us our lives, we must rescue the sword of Alcyone!

Lgjkwhcy oYou know, Kramer, I would hope I won't lose anyone in a map as simple as this one. That would be profoundly embarrassing.

Jiimkcqi o

A rout map? Well... yes and no. Berwick understands that rout is a painful objective, and once you acquire Balmung, the option to merely seize the temple becomes available.

76xpo2mx oJ2583frj o

To that end, we'll want to kill Shagaal. He's carrying the thing, though he cannot use it. He also has Parry. That could be annoying. Still, at 20 HP and 3 defense, this guy should mostly be a non-issue. Larentia will take him down with ease.

Eza2hyej oS7rpi5re oCddgpjnf oR7gij7fs o

Verda, Uriad and Morax are also carrying stuff of interest. Morax in particular has a blood knife, the last one until chapter 12. Erzheimer would like that, but... to be honest, I doubt I'll be able to get it here. Escapestone, treasure and mend would all be nice, though not essential. Note that Verda has Vantage. That could prove to be a nasty surprise, but the swordbreaker is weak enough that I'm not too worried.

8fklpa6p o

It's been too long since the last time we did this. Derrick, lead the charge!

Ccviewf2 oQafox8bp o

Don't worry, I have everything planned. He cannot die from that crit.

Hre0ibwd oHtf117wh o

Not that it matters, because Derrick is too good.

Jg0hgsyl o

Derrick has taken the Mjölnir, since Axel is equipped with the brave Tabarzin. He immediately puts it to good use.

Wvsg7huy o

...Aaaaaaaand there we go, first mistake. Two crits would've killed him. Off to a great start...

K3pohrde o

Good thing it did not come to pass. That's a sleep arrow gone, by the way. Since he took no damage, it didn't do anything.

Ctbu1wbt oBijxej7y o

Now, let's end the map, shall we?

Ws558ndf o

You get one-shot, my dude. Don't make me laugh.

Smw5g9gy oSh5zdjoi o

Ahh, fuck!

Pjyx4zct o

No matter. Next turn. For now, we can see if this works out.

4lpywd33 oWeo2y88t o

Nice! Good job, Clifford.

T2pgagic o

Medicine is cool.

Aw9wxyfv o

Now, Axel and Kramer advance cautiously.

Kuwlijkt o

So do the thieves. Unfortunately for them, they all landed within a three hex radius of Larentia, meaning they cannot hide.

Vnp3zrch o

Shagaal tries to run as well, with similar results.

Jaqgzw5r o

Come the next turn, Clifford leads the offensive.

Dogdolmt oJk8ipxa7 oWwq8oknw o

I am so happy that this guy is free now.

Bl14as2a oX2tqymw4 o

Oh boy.

Dvhu1co5 o

Sorry, but no.

Hdzk8tfo o

Let's give this another go. I'd like the rest of the stuff, but it is imperative that we at least get the Balmung back.

2oarhbpq o

Very good, Larentia.

Bpfltscb oCoqe9jtn o

Go behead some blondes in hell, won't you?

Qucaxvsx oWh8nud9h o

We've got the legendary sword of Alcyone! Its description reveals that the Berwick League is... surprisingly young, actually. Only five centuries?

C3affeuw o

Well, I think it's about time we addressed the elephant in the room.

L0swryta o

This guy.

C5c5mfo2 o

For starters, this fucker is terrifying. I'm not sure why he doesn't have a name, he even has a face. He has no skills other than Blade, but he does have a fuckton of speed and two incredibly scary swords.

Ljl96gt7 o

The Albatross is the item of interest here. This isn't just a regular ol' Erzheimer item - it is the only copy of the Albatross to be found in this game. We miss this, we're fucked. I wouldn't care that much, but this sword also comes with its very own Erzheimer scene, which is quite fun. I'd like to show it off, so I'll rely on the good ol' exception once more. I'm going to savescum this guy. Whether it be by stealing Albatross with Thaddy without getting him murdered afterwards, or crippling the swordmaster, I'm going to get that sword.

5mi5an5b o

Ah! Kramer is under attack! I'd like to point out that Adept could kill him. So... yeah.

Jy5agzdw oSthexqg3 o

Thankfully it didn't happen. Instead, the axeman and Kramer take turns failing miserably.

51lhverq o

I was too slow to catch it, but Uriad tried to move forward and crashed into the hidden Thaddy.

Gxy7txku o

But Verda is the one with the treasure. You're the mend guy!

Cyi7zdcb o

Okay, okay, sorry. No need to get antsy.

Frtfq2t1 o

Not looking too bad so far...

1ikv1bp6 o

For the final move of the turn, Derrick finishes off this guy.

74bkaute oQp7irogc o

Been a while, huh? Damn maps with terrain that Derrick cannot traverse...

U2gh8iic o

Halfway to another level.

C7qveptw o

Ahahahahahahahahahahah! Guess who forgot to give Axel the correct charm again? This is giving me flashbacks to FE6... I really hope this won't be like Lilina and her angelic robe. I think I went like 5 or 6 friggin' chapters without ever remembering to give her the damn thing...

Lbjqszoj o

Next up, I'd like to try a fun thing. If Axel kills this guy, there's a chance he may rob the dark axe. Erzheimer would be pleased, so let's give it a shot.

Ahc8fs34 o

This was an absolutely terrible idea. He has Counter and Adept. If Axel gets hit twice, then gets hit again on the enemy turn, he's fucked. Oh, but not to worry. That's exactly why I gave him that charm, isn't it?

6jqwem4d oMqcdbxps oDcj8jx2n o

...What...?

Hnwxmyg4 oShr2rghn o

Gwaaahhh! Damnit, what the hell is wrong with me!? I can't take these risks... Not before I finally give him the correct charm, 10 maps from now or something!

5yburxrm oCtdvnlgg o

You'd think he has a 20% hitrate and the enemy is the one with 50%.

Godwi6o0 o

Unfortunately, I was unable to get Larentia to deal max charge damage to Morax. Still, if he by chance gets crippled from this attack, it'd be great.

Musxnv3m o

Who wants to bet you will, in fact, start now?

Lzakqg1s o

Boom! Now, let's have a cripple!

Uh2vvswa o

Fork.

L3neyerp o

Ahahahahahahahahahah! Hahahah! Knives have a higher chance of injury. If he got injured, Thaddy could nab the dark axe next turn.

Or, he can get murdered by a 4% chance. Guess who is NOT taking this risk.

L2e4agpp o

He does provoke the guy, though. Axel mustn't get Adepted.

Bda25u8h oWhy is your shirt green in your portrait, but brown in your battle sprite?

Sbmzlnsq oWhat the heck are you even talking about? You high?

Bda25u8h oNot as high as you!

Sbmzlnsq oYou callin' me a crackhead? 'Cause one, you're right, and two, you're dead!

7e6m8jjz o

Hurray, four HP of healing per turn. Instead of immunity to death. Urrrgh...

M4jicxee o

Okay, I just marked the range of the chu-ko-nu and the swordmaster. Prevent any ugly accidents.

Cc8qrutv o

It's about time Larentia nicked another thief. Uriad, you're up!

Ffssxwll o

Out!

C2xkv9y7 oSkrlbztl o

Neither did all the units I got killed. But that's life. Sometimes you just land up with the less-than-ideal tactician.

Ry9t34yi o

Not bad. That'll be a few more full heals from Owen.

Oidnetwk o

Ah! Aaahhhh, shit! The provoked guy ran at Thaddy, and since Thaddy is armed, he's started a fight! No, you dolt, do you have a deathwish!?

Rnxyimzq o

Oh, lord...

0imjtunr o

Hwaaaaaaaargh! Okay, good. Phew... that could've been terrible.

Uqgxf5tb o

To be honest, I'm glad this didn't land. I'm not sure if Counter can trigger on a double attack, and I don't want to find out.

2xl2lmyw o

Okay, next up. Really stupid move. If I had any sense, I would've thrown a verutum at the guy, instead of pointlessly risking getting Vantage'd.

Agkd5isq o

Well...

9nium8a0 oZdjxpxnd o

Yeah. I'm so stupid, I swear...

Fqv08xm1 o

Hey, this guy's moving.

Fbp55jmu oCbibqakg o

......

Ahhh, fiddlesticks...

Hyvtowlm o

You know, if that guy with the chu-ko-nu moves now, we're a bit screwed.

Tay1a4h3 oMx9mantg o

Pictured is my attempt to get the dark axe. Again. Robbery works on range 1, but not if the user refuses to land any strikes.

Wtty4ojr o

Gaaahh, 3% crit...

Awdv2pip oPutkhxyh o

Thankfully, Clifford is still Sidequest Ward, so he cannot be downed.

A07njbxn o

...You know, I believe I may've made a misstep.

Tykxtrvq oLfd3cexq o

So not only is the Albatross unstealable now (because he has it equipped), but capturing the guy will also be extremely awkward, because his health is low now. Nice. Thanks, me. You're the greatest tactician.

6tmdwcjs o

Fuck my life... Look, let's just... Derrick, please fix everything.

Oige9yso o

Oh, and Morax and Verda are going to get away, because Larentia is asleep and Clifford can't reach with all the forests and enemies.

Oclvddz1 o

So, uh... Turn 5, and this is looking... rather bad, not gonna lie.

Cvmfley0 o

First of all, I don't want this guy to erase Clifford. Not Clifford, of all people. I can't lose Clifford, right after he's turned his life around, too. Thaddy, lure him away.

Bda25u8h oHey, guy!

Hiyigysd oWassup?

Bda25u8h oFancy sword!

Hiyigysd oThanks! Wanna see how it works?

Bda25u8h oI'd love to!

Hiyigysd oOkay, here I come!

S8mbtvuf o

This guy healed. He also left the cover of the forest. That's... nice. Maybe Axel will finally turn around his embarrassing performance.

31ccx5h6 o

For fuck's sake, more problems...

Kazat73y oNi6nypir o

Nice. Thank you, Kramer.

Kjaqdq1v o

Now... uhhh...

Cnc4k4su o

Let's try this idiot one more time.

This was a terrible mistake, by the way. More on that later.

Rakhk8vg o

Good.

Erlkkovu o

Better.

Gu8y6yz2 oWur53bwk o

...Adequate.

Okidu0mg o

Aaaaaand there we go. I should've moved Clifford instead...

Eeqspbfj o

Ooohh, I can't believe it... This is ridiculous! What even is your plan here? He may be asleep, but he's still Clifford! You can't kill the Clifford!

29i1fs88 oFiyxo4qg o

AXEL!

Mar3otri o

Holy shit, that is so scary...

Yts885uk oWkxacx59 o

You mongrel! Die! Everyone will die! Everyone... not on my team, I would hope!

S6kddhdq o

Oh no, Clifford is under attack.

I think this is a good time to explain something that I think has never come up: sleep reduces all your defenses and avoid to 0.

...so... you know what I said earlier? "You can't kill the Clifford", something like that? Yeah. Clifford is in very real mortal peril right now. On the other hand, a good thwack can wake a unit up, so... Let's pray for the best?

F5wfhevs oYoaozqwx o

Hey, I never knew these guys have lines when they get close to the escape point. I've never let them leave before. Though usually I don't have to worry about losing my army forever, so I'm willing to take more risks.

Kbnohfpk o

Okay, so... At this point, the situation has gotten completely out of control.

Qwzg7tcj o

Thankfully, as I said before, we have the option to seize since we got the Balmung. We probably will have to try that.

Qivmse7v o

First off, however, Thaddy unequips the dagger and flees. Don't want him to attack that swordmaster.

Fuusvlkg o

What? Derrick? Please... as if you could--

Jdo3k41t o

Hah!

Ewhek9to o

D'aw.

Iyz0uqka o

Oh, c'mon...

Hwiqlyow oEe7vngpv o

C'MON, REALLY!? HE BROKE HIS SHIELD AND THEN ADEPTED HIM! What a load of bull...

Uz7nu3cn oZ3pgxvyf o

AAAAAAAAAARRRRGHHH STOP IT!

0knjizrc o

Okay, quick, equip one of your spare shields and--

Ko8y3olh o

...son of a bitch, I forgot to give him a vulnerary...

Cu0sk7my o

Half the army is in danger of death right now. And we can't seize this turn.

...Look, just... Run before you get slept as well, Derrick...

Zb9pew7e o

Ah!

Msyx2qhj o

Ah! Ah! AH! AH! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Aqd5oxff o

...Okay, so the good news is, he's not dead.

Oiaq9jm5 oPfdeublb o

The bad news is, he's crippled.

Bnj2eqji oScqx3tg5 o

The worse news is, swarm poisoned him.

Zlwrzu6j oCofdkvyb o

......

You know, this almost sounds like a joke. "Did you hear? There was a guy so bad at Berwick Saga, he lost Clifford in Stolen Sword!" Who would ever believe that? It's such an absurd scenario! Most powerful unit in the game, gone in this short and easy fucking map.

Honestly, it's laughable. Or at least I laughed. Free Clifford, folks. Sure was worth training Ruby the whole game for this. Ahahahahah... hahah...

Ftw7ejwl o

Oh, and it's not even over, either. Derrick and Axel are both still in bad shape.

I7m4vszy o

Axel is hidden, so Derrick must run first of all.

Pinn6hpt o

Larentia is next in line. Thankfully, both her and Clifford woke up at the end of last turn. It was too late for Clifford, but Larentia may be saved yet.

A0a7yjm2 oOtntji1y o

At least I didn't lose the flier. Clifford... can be replaced. Badly, but he can be replaced.

...I might have to seriously consider promoting Adel now, though. Lances are so much fun, and now I've lost them... If ever I find a very high-defense enemy that I can disarm, I'll be sure to spent 200 turns just whacking away with Adel until he gets to 30 spear rank. I know no other way to do it.

Psudtm2t oJwbfaxxu o

At least this time she hasn't gotten slept.

V92lnulj o0cx2mre3 o

Thank... fuck.

Bgfdsvz7 o

At this point we've more or less failed the mission entirely, but... meh. Might as well get a couple of kills while we're here. Try to salvage the situation.

Jspkm6hg oWmqlzo8r o

Can I at least get a good level? As a consolation prize...?

Ogjbxcsy o

Ooohhhhh I hate myself

R4hsqeip o

Get out. Please.

V7rmmvot o

Now, about the swordmaster... He's moved right on top of us.

Sf4wb7th o

He still has the Albatross, and I still want it. So here's what we're going to do: I'm going to try to buy enough time to get to the turn 10 save. Then I can rig an injury or something.

Bmgmxewi o

Thankfully, he's still provoked, so I can just have Thaddy run for his life. Let's hope the provoked status lasts a long, long time...

Vabokxuq oZwhkfqij o

Axel, heal up. Not you, man. Not you.

1rmvze8t o

Noooo, where are you going!? He's chasing Derrick! The gall of this guy...! Axel, this is all your fault! If you hadn't missed all those times...!

Aho9d0ta o

Kramer sits on the temple. I want to be able to leave at a moment's notice if needed be.

Dzvfyuha o

Oh my God, this guy is chasing Derrick too... Please, no... Don't let this mission, of all missions, become this LP's massacre...

Ttr6mvoj o

Okay, so... Here's the deal. Derrick can't run away, and this guy will kill him with Adept if he catches up, because I am a fortunate soul. If Larentia lands this, she can Canto in front of Derrick and keep the merc from attacking him. If she misses, we stand a chance to lose both of them right now.

By all means, I should seize. But I want the Albatross, so by all means, I should let Derrick die. He's the worst unit in the game, after all, and it's not like I'd lose his items.

Unfortunately, I am a profoundly stupid person and I love Derrick. Not a good combination, in this situation. Hell yeah, let's risk the only flier's life! Go!

Hjmj1ado o

Aaahhhh... phewwww... Good. Good! Derrick is alive! Now the only casualty will be... Uh, Clifford.

7zb3pdgn oQ6duelub oWuzs5jwi o

And with that, we've officially saved the worst unit in the game. Hey, say whatever you want about him, but he has survived Clifford. That has to count for something...

Rsnkkwgl oUinygczn o

This guy is still provoked. At this point I was scared shitless enough that I actually became a competent player and remembered to check this guy every single turn to ensure that he was still provoked.

Kwbqsscd o

One more turn...

Qdmx8oxl oLtgx2pcy oH44h0l8s o

Larentia, kill this guy before he has even the slightest chance of killing Derrick.

X2qgzevg oSudzgrov o

Nice.

Akunlt52 oUq3ratfl o

Still provoked... Holy shit, this has to be the longest provocation I've ever seen in this game. It just refuses to go away! All the better for me, of course, but... Clifford's still dead.

K23rv3lo o

Okay, finally. Finally. We'll soon get to leave this mess behind us.

3dg63wvk o

So here's the plan: Axel will axe this guy a question, and I'll reset until he robs the Albatross.

Senghhvi oOxv8isov o

...Well, I tried that a few times before I realized: no, Ruben. That won't work, you dummy. He's level 11, and the Albatross is rank 12.

Vhm9kozb oOsbaqk1u o

So uhhhh new plan. Thaddy will lure him here, and then Larentia will use Mercy on him with the harpoon until he's injured. Then I can steal the sword and pray Thaddy dodges or something.

0oonibqv oMm85ifyi o

It... only took me a couple of tries, actually. I was surprisingly lucky. Last time I tried this, it took me like 15 minutes in real time.

Flixwejj o

Quite convenient, indeed.

E9xpteez o

Axel might as well have him.

Mjrxof4p oWcxlclgx oU89wptj4 o

Hurray. We got it. But at what cost?

Vmz7yg6x o

Now... about these guys...

......

7q5fchdz o

Ahhh, fuck that noise.

Hozfeskp o

There's a little scene before the save point. It's short, so let's watch it.

Uzpizlte oHv2ls9hc o0yvze3dj o

Prte9f55 o......

Prte9f55 oThis is Alcyone's... The legendary swordmaster's... Such a smooth sensation... Like a warm breeze... A tenderness enveloping my very soul...!

V92xz64t o

Kramer's theme.

All right. That was that. I, uh... I...

Holy shit, that was quite possibly the most embarrassing display of utter incompetence in my entire LPing career. I don't think I'll ever be able to one-up this. At least the times I lost 5 units in one chapter, they were all bad units in tough chapters. Not, y'know... Clifford in Stolen Sword. And it was entirely my fault, too. Easily preventable, by simply moving him out of sleep range. One single action was all it would've taken. But no. Gotta attack axe guy with sword guy.

...Ah, fuck me... Well, to those of you patient enough to deal with my crap, I say farewell. Next time we do things or something.

Urgh...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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6pr5xzmn o

 

 

 

 

 

To be continued

Death count: Christine
                        Esteban
                        Czene
                        Faye x 2
                        Clifford

* Unavailable

Capture count: 2 (Daoud, Elbert)

Cripple count: 1 (Perceval)

Reset count: 3 (Ward: 1, Abus: 2)

 

Current perfect streak: Maybe I should give myself a streak of -100, just for that.

Best perfect streak: 6 maps

 

 

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5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Zlwrzu6j o

His life just jumped off a Clifford 

I'm out of practice sheesh that was weak (like him)

Also Ruebhen is super evil now, neat. 

Edited by Pengaius
spelling mistake, thanks golb

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Spoiler

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't say I get the reference, sadly.

Well, you're not missing much. Just an old sprite webcomic about the original Final Fantasy. It was popular for sure and had a huge impact on the genre, but it didn't exactly age well. Nor did it really improve during it's 10 year run, be it art or writing.

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The team. It is not a good idea to bring Derrick, but I want to field him already. Honestly though, Sylvis would've been a much better option, what was I thinking...

I get the presence of the D-man but I'm not sure what Axel is doing here. He can't hit things at the best of days, let alone speedy thieves in the forest.

 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oWe can't allow them to escape! Even if it costs us our lives, we must rescue the sword of Alcyone!

Kramer, you can of course do what you want. But don't expect other people to die for your sword boner.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I am so happy that this guy is free now.

Yeah. I would rather not do the lategame without a bulky unit with Provoke. And I think I'd rather get Ruby to Paladin then Elbert to 20 Spear.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The Albatross is the item of interest here. This isn't just a regular ol' Erzheimer item - it is the only copy of the Albatross to be found in this game. We miss this, we're fucked. I wouldn't care that much, but this sword also comes with its very own Erzheimer scene, which is quite fun. I'd like to show it off, so I'll rely on the good ol' exception once more. I'm going to savescum this guy. Whether it be by stealing Albatross with Thaddy without getting him murdered afterwards, or crippling the swordmaster, I'm going to get that sword.

Technically there is a second one on the final map. But it's not like you can give Erzheimer that one.

Surprised you didn't comment on the hilarious 50% chance of backfiring. This weapon literally averages the same amount of damage to it's user then to it's targets.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahahahahahahah! Guess who forgot to give Axel the correct charm again? This is giving me flashbacks to FE6... I really hope this won't be like Lilina and her angelic robe. I think I went like 5 or 6 friggin' chapters without ever remembering to give her the damn thing...

I have this keep happening too. Pretty embarrassing considering they are not even using the same icon, even if they are very similar.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
M4jicxee o

Okay, I just marked the range of the chu-ko-nu and the swordmaster. Prevent any ugly accidents.

I can't help but notice you didn't mark the range of the guy with the Sleep Orb.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Okay, next up. Really stupid move. If I had any sense, I would've thrown a verutum at the guy, instead of pointlessly risking getting Vantage'd.

Maybe a Lance would have been better since it prevents any chance of getting countered.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Cbibqakg o

......

Ahhh, fiddlesticks...

Well, there goes Watchful. And maybe Larentia too, depending on what else this guy is packing.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, I never knew these guys have lines when they get close to the escape point. I've never let them leave before. Though usually I don't have to worry about losing my army forever, so I'm willing to take more risks.

So this is you playing it save?

At least Derrick will be fine. Can't die if you never even reach the enemy.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oiaq9jm5 o

This is an accurate assessment if I've ever seen one. No need to rub it in, though.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The bad news is, he's crippled.

Well, unless you can seize immediately, that's a dead Clifford. Not like any of the bandits surrounding him will capture him.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The worse news is, swarm poisoned him.

Or that's a dead Clifford. Oh well.

To think Ward was praising Clifford's skills in front of Reese and then he goes and gets himself killed the first day on the job.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Zlwrzu6j o

Sooo... who's gonna tell Ruby? Or Ward, for that matter.

Or Alex. Poor guy is gonna go broke now.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Larentia is next in line. Thankfully, both her and Clifford woke up at the end of last turn. It was too late for Clifford, but Larentia may be saved yet.

So Clifford woke up just in time to experience his body being broken, defenseless and no doubt in excruciating pain before the poison finished him off. Damn. Couldn't have been more cruel if you had tried to make him suffer on purpose.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Unfortunately, I am a profoundly stupid person and I love Derrick. Not a good combination, in this situation. Hell yeah, let's risk the only flier's life! Go!

Not to mention the only remaining character with Watchful.
 

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hurray. We got it. But at what cost?

Clifford's life, Ruby's happiness and Alex' business.

Ward's probably gonna be fine though. His wife is dead, his daughter is dead, god knows how many of his comrades are dead. At this point he's probably gone numb from the pain, so this shouldn't even register.

 

Edited by BrightBow

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2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Msyx2qhj o

Ah! Ah! AH! AH! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Ah! Ah! AH! AH! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The worse news is, swarm poisoned him.

Zlwrzu6j oCofdkvyb o

Oh.

Oh...

Oh god, he actually died. Wow.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

At least I didn't lose the flier. Clifford... can be replaced. Badly, but he can be replaced.

Well, there's really not all that much that Clifford can do that the other pallies can't... He just does it better and easier.

Wait, this is because there's only supposed to be 24 paladins! That means Arthur's also in trouble!

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Upsctr1v o
 

 A typical rapey/slaver Berwick Saga boss?!

eJI1fn8.jpg

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

V92xz64t o

Kramer is good character.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Holy shit, that was quite possibly the most embarrassing display of utter incompetence in my entire LPing career. I don't think I'll ever be able to one-up this. At least the times I lost 5 units in one chapter, they were all bad units in tough chapters. Not, y'know... Clifford in Stolen Sword. And it was entirely my fault, too. Easily preventable, by simply moving him out of sleep range. One single action was all it would've taken. But no. Gotta attack axe guy with sword guy.

Hey.  Better than Ward in chapter 2's main mission. That was embarrassing.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm... not sure how to feel about the fact that you built a shrine and made up new vocabulary in the name of a teacher. You sure it didn't evolve into a cult by second year?

Well, he did give rise to a "You know I had to do it to em" meme too because of his yearbook photo being nearly identical to the original one. Sadly, I wasn't taught by him the next year, so he remained only a meme.

...Or that's what we told the police, anyways.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Keep shavers far away from me. I don't want them anywhere near my beard.

Or my hair, for that matter. The portrait is a bit outdated now, because I'm letting my hair grow long. So far I've been... rather unsuccessful. Hasn't even reached shoulder length. Actually, right now my hairstyle looks a lot like Seteth's. Could be worse, I guess.

Ah, the classic "Corona" style-cut. Totally in style right now.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

FE6 Marcus? But FE6 Marcus lasts the entire game too! Didn't you know? He kills Murdock with the Durandal! He's better than Perceval!

Of course! I mixed up Perceval with Marcus.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

One point of luck prevents a crippling. Five prevents a death.

Nice! I need to rig some luck levels for everybody...

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm sad I didn't get to show him off, but that's life.

Or death, if you're Christine or Arina's physical integrity.

 

 

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10 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, maybe her adopting him would be too much, but I'd still like to think that they remain in friendly terms at least. I just don't want Pelleas to be left all alone again, okay? He deserves better than that. I even wanted to let Tauroneo kill him in my run, for the "Tauroneo calls himself King Killer but can't kill Ashnard so he settles for Pelleas" memes, but by the time the moment came I felt so bad for him that I just had to grant his final request.

Meanwhile, I chose Micaiah to kill him pretty much because I just imagined Sothe and Almedha going "GoOd JoB mIcAiAh" after thinking about that memey line and I just couldn't not do it then (Also Micaiah having to kill her king feels like a significant hit to her).

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What's your story, if you don't mind me asking?

Raised in it, because that's what happens when you are born in what is considered the most Cathoilic of countries, with Catholic parents, in Catholic schools.

I ended up feeling differently as I got older, nothing too controversial there (as opposed to being frustrated with the church for obvious reasons, that alone wouldn't have made me atheist).

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

More like unused sprite and unused sprite with the brightness turned up a bit. Seriously, the fabulous Raze priest with the pink hair is in the game files. Didn't even touch it (beyond the cropping I apply to all my portraits). I wish they actually used it, he's more gorgeous than you'd imagine a garbage bagman could be. Uh... Owen notwithstanding.

Owen looks not so distinguished when he's unleashed his inner bag.

21 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What have I done, I've turned them into the protagonists of a sitcom...

It's more like an anti-romcom.

22 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Looks like a damn right mess. I hope it gets resolved... decently, at least.

That's a good putt, it's in the hole and HOGAN'S HO-GONE.

Sorry, had to do it.

In all seriousness, I have a feeling the media's trying to make this the end of it and I wouldn't be surprised because I doubt anyone acted as mad lad as he did. But others are coming under scrutiny, which is no bad thing. And Hogan is in a rare camp of commissioners having to go: the other lad I've heard about took bribes.

22 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, did she at least know how to speak english or, you know, irish? Because that alone would put her above former spanish president Rajoy.

I mean, Disaster Taoiseach did have that hangover interview, while helping act to crash the economy and have no idea how to deal with the aftermath, while the Minister of U[Turns lost his post in under 20 days because of a drink-driving offence four years ago. Point being, drink has damaged both forever.

Nah Faye's not on their level, though I wonder about the father.

22 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

To be fair, it's very in-character of Erzheimer to refuse to move on from each item once he notices it. He probably starts snooping about Ward's bag before he has a chance to say "hello."

He can smell Razite items.

Also other expensive stuff.

Is that how he became rich?

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

In fairness, what else can we do? We can't dedicate the rest of our lives to guarding every single temple in the world. We don't have infinite time, and we can't be in 27 places at once! That's something Volcens should deal with. But obviously, the fact that Quescria came to us means that Volcens has been very Volcens about this issue.

True, but you'd wonder how much it would take to have smaller defences that could call upon larger forces when attacked.

Course Volcens wouldn't give a crap, but still.

24 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Incidentally, I just made a horrible discovery. It hit me right now, and I just had to check to make sure.

Ugg0cmtj oRnwsddzf o

Uqp5cdmu o

"Raze" is Lane.

...Goodness, now I feel dirty having described the portrait as "fabulous"...

How many others have that chin, mouth and nose?

24 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eyyy, it's the meme song I never remember! Skrimir in song form... Though now that I've played RD, I actually can remember who Skrimir is. For a while I was convinced Rinkah was named Reina, but that no longer applies either... At this point I'd say it's one of the Fates butlers. I can't ever tell them apart.

...No, wait! It's the one guy, what's his name... The guy from Radiant Dawn, Ranulf's second adjutant! The guy who acts as the voice of reason to Lethe's sister! Kyza, maybe? That guy is so forgettable! He's worse than Tomas! Original Tomas, I mean. The other Tomas is awful for entirely different reasons. The first of which being that he stole OG Tomas's name!

Kyza'a also got the unfortunate luck of being a gay character who got censored and who was portrayed badly already.

25 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

At least you're not the US. We're in pretty bad shape ourselves, but... at least we're not the US. The US is just... kinda falling apart right now, from what I've gathered.

Legit, it could die depending on what happens.

26 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Meet Verda, Shagaal and Uriad. Can you guess who's the leader here?

Shagaal you say..... Hmmmmmm

I feel like that's familiar somehow.

Like there's some prick who hates the man under him because he's not him.

It's slipped my mind.

This Chagaal will probably die anyway.

28 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Bl14as2a oX2tqymw4 o

Oh boy.

Their names are Ent bandits.

Ent bandits.

I can't help but imagine tree men turned to crime.

29 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Wh8nud9h o

We've got the legendary sword of Alcyone! Its description reveals that the Berwick League is... surprisingly young, actually. Only five centuries?

I'm not so surprised. How long have the racists been here?

For comparison, Grannvale's history was about 750 at the start of Genealogy, Tellius 780, Archanea 140 after Anri, 800 for Magvel and so on (I did look some of these up on the Wiki wiki.). 500 might be smaller, but I'd argue more realistic.

32 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Tykxtrvq oLfd3cexq o

So not only is the Albatross unstealable now (because he has it equipped), but capturing the guy will also be extremely awkward, because his health is low now. Nice. Thanks, me. You're the greatest tactician.

Yikes.

Albatross is some slippery sword.

  

33 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
S6kddhdq o

Oh no, Clifford is under attack.

I think this is a good time to explain something that I think has never come up: sleep reduces all your defenses and avoid to 0.

...so... you know what I said earlier? "You can't kill the Clifford", something like that? Yeah. Clifford is in very real mortal peril right now. On the other hand, a good thwack can wake a unit up, so... Let's pray for the best?

Clifford is doomed.

This 0 defence should have been a thing in FE honestly.

33 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Hwiqlyow oEe7vngpv o

C'MON, REALLY!? HE BROKE HIS SHIELD AND THEN ADEPTED HIM! What a load of bull...

This chapter I swear.

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Okay, so the good news is, he's not dead.

Oiaq9jm5 oPfdeublb o

The bad news is, he's crippled.

Clifford stopping drinking has led to him falling off a cliff.

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The worse news is, swarm poisoned him.

Zlwrzu6j oCofdkvyb o

......

You know, this almost sounds like a joke. "Did you hear? There was a guy so bad at Berwick Saga, he lost Clifford in Stolen Sword!" Who would ever believe that? It's such an absurd scenario! Most powerful unit in the game, gone in this short and easy fucking map.

Honestly, it's laughable. Or at least I laughed. Free Clifford, folks. Sure was worth training Ruby the whole game for this. Ahahahahah... hahah...

RIP bad dad.

You're not even as mad as I felt you would be. Therefore, I will not meme on his end.

36 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Okay, so... Here's the deal. Derrick can't run away, and this guy will kill him with Adept if he catches up, because I am a fortunate soul. If Larentia lands this, she can Canto in front of Derrick and keep the merc from attacking him. If she misses, we stand a chance to lose both of them right now.

By all means, I should seize. But I want the Albatross, so by all means, I should let Derrick die. He's the worst unit in the game, after all, and it's not like I'd lose his items.

Unfortunately, I am a profoundly stupid person and I love Derrick. Not a good combination, in this situation. Hell yeah, let's risk the only flier's life! Go!

This text.

Read this text and realise three units could have died.

Fate is a strange mistress.

36 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

So here's the plan: Axel will axe this guy a question, and I'll reset until he robs the Albatross.

Senghhvi oOxv8isov o

...Well, I tried that a few times before I realized: no, Ruben. That won't work, you dummy. He's level 11, and the Albatross is rank 12.

That's just disastrous.

Almost everything is wrong.

37 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Prte9f55 oThis is Alcyone's... The legendary swordmaster's... Such a smooth sensation... Like a warm breeze... A tenderness enveloping my very soul...!

V92xz64t o

I hope you know bad dad died for you to hold this.

And nothing of value was lost byeeeeeeeeeee

38 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Holy shit, that was quite possibly the most embarrassing display of utter incompetence in my entire LPing career. I don't think I'll ever be able to one-up this. At least the times I lost 5 units in one chapter, they were all bad units in tough chapters. Not, y'know... Clifford in Stolen Sword. And it was entirely my fault, too. Easily preventable, by simply moving him out of sleep range. One single action was all it would've taken. But no. Gotta attack axe guy with sword guy.

...Ah, fuck me... Well, to those of you patient enough to deal with my crap, I say farewell. Next time we do things or something.

Sleep needs to be more dangerous in FE.

This would be hilarious on, say, that map in RD where I got stuck on the stairway.

39 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Bohuk7zj oAbkqakjq o4nejsc1q oG42ohyvd o

How that resulted in Imhullu not blowing her up I'll never know.

39 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
0at8tkuv o2emz4t7x oZosuioea oHc29lfat o

Poor Elaine, being let know she's in the dunce corner for him.

40 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
9o7bsxsj oKu3ech8e o

Pretzel is (finally?) slain.

There should be more tortured souls in the spell, maybe make references? 😛

41 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
0dmmcgix o1mz7cyy4 o

This...... this doesn't end well.

42 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Jfqfrqpk o0irwhhnz o

This is an apology I guess.

I will not accept it, because it is insufficient.

42 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Is8anum6 oOps74kry oXzg0nkre o4gjhfd9j o

Harriet:

tB2Yt3ZYkNSDnQLiURpZeBDxLoTwhLjSjdGj7yX5

(I swear I'm not making Harriet and Elaine animals intentionally.)

I also swore he was kinda into Elaine, but I'm dumb.

43 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bfgmchob oQc7j809b o

Harriet should just be up front about coming out. I don't know that she's into Elaine for sure, but it's the easiest option.

And yes Ruebhen, you are making bad excuses. Build a bridge.

43 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Rx1nxmjp oYdfvzcms oSbevjzav oQn7itboy o

That sounds like he's about to be a school shooter.

Damm immortals, right?

43 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yca7bilj o

Of course Arran would be the one who doesn't realise Ruebhen thinks he's in a lover's squabble. Too noble and old to think of such things?

44 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Bbee0dyz oJ8gwrm1t o

Never go full fedora.

Old men will throw rocks at you.

44 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Lnshhwmp oPbivnmkk o

RIP bad parents Albertus and Margaret.

45 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Cnscjvvv o17v9q6vf o

I can't help but laugh myself at the gif, it's like he's laughing so hard that he's shaking it.

Winter's coming, I can't wait for this track to be appropriate again. I'll miss the sun though.

I also probably destroyed my multi-usb adapter (Well, I mean I could actually still use it in US mode, but why would I want that?), so that's not great.

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1 hour ago, Benice said:

Well, there's really not all that much that Clifford can do that the other pallies can't... He just does it better and easier.

Clifford is one of only 3 units capable of using Lances. The other 2 are Adel and Leon after promotion. Getting them promoted isn't just a journey on it's own but they also end up in a straight up worse class. They will still be limited to Spears and Small Shields after promotion. No Swords and Medium Shields like Clifford can.

Clifford shares a lot of traits with Elbert. They both are fairly bulky Cavalier units with Provoke. They also share Shieldaire, which further helps their durability. But even after promotion, Elbert still doesn't have Lances.

And Lances aren't just great because of their fantastic power. Since they prevent counterattacks, they can be used to circumvent nasty skills such as Vengeful.

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1 minute ago, BrightBow said:

[Smart and well thought-out reasons that Clifford is a top-tier unit]

Shhhhhhh! I am trying to prevent Ruben from getting depression so the updates come quickly! Uh, Saphira is better than Clifford because she has horses and lances after promotion! Yeah!

...In all seriousness though, you're definitely right. I don't know why I though Ruby/Artur/Leon/Adel/Elbert could be better than Clifford.

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[Addendums]

Spoiler
On 8/23/2020 at 12:02 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Guys, the thermal drill:

On 8/23/2020 at 12:02 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Go get it:

I already did:

https://gamepress.gg/arknights/should-you-pull/arknights-should-you-pull-drillelectric#topic-880666

Unfortunately...

 

On 8/23/2020 at 12:02 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/i6wfys/orca_attacks_shark_by_maskmascot/

2saj3cp763g51.jpg

 

On 8/25/2020 at 11:32 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, I just realized her smile is... almost as terrifying as Reese's.

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iicj6t/i_tried_to_draw_some_extra_expressions_for/

xalhxwghdsj51.jpg

 

*Insert Enid here*

https://www.reddit.com/r/girlsfrontline/comments/9u2aj3/translated_turkeys_4koma_series_02/

m5bl0t9yeaw11.png

 

 

*Insert Percy and then Enid here*

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/i6v02n/meet_the_ifrit/

vjfnukz5p2g51.jpg

 

[Replies]

Spoiler
5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahh... Sounds... uh, good. I think.

Only on paper: in practice, the slow is pointless when you are actually supposed to one-shot enemies pulling them into pits (and the damage would generally be more useful otherwise) and the AOE is moot when you'll most likely be dragging 2-3 enemies at most anyway.

She actually DOES have anoher ace up her sleeve that lets her carve her own niche, and it just happens to be a rather useful niche for the current content, but she needs to be promoted twice for it and it's not really worth the cost...

97b1055e-9317-40a0-a23e-2b52b26f01d1.jpg

She's still good enough to do her job, but outside of that Rope and CH would generally perform better when you need them to, and you get the latter for free as a newbie reward while the latter is relatively easy to get and cheaper to raise due to lower rarity.

e1fd7ca3-32d3-404c-90ee-5d90aa11529c.jpg

She's kinda in the same spot as Vanilla (or Kramer): perfectly usable, but with no reason to do so aside from favoritism.

559c0848-0051-4f18-8df3-6398844eedfd.jpg

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I... was not aware that it allowed you to phase enemies through walls.

It's still being debated wether that's a bug or a feature (not like anyone's complaining about it though)

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That is not a sentence I expected to read when I got up this morning.

EDIT: Ruben from the future here! I'm proofreading the update, and I'd just like to say that this still isn't a sentence I expected to read when I got up this morning.

Believe it or not, that anime is actually family-friendly.

(No, i'm NOT kidding)

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I still have no idea what fairies are supposed to do!

Here and here.

And also here.

(Plus the stuff i already linked before. Twice)

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Uh uh...

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is literally just the old fairy tale with an Arknight character. How could anybody hate a character so much that they'd put her in this fairy tale of all fairy tales?

Quote

ina2r8db39j51.jpg?width=600&format=pjpg&

Also:

Quote

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Honestly, this is just perfect. I can totally see this guy being a whale in gacha games.

Incidentally, Ceia apparently managed to succesfully nab 8th place this Theater.

(And i managed to stay in the 1%-5% bracket too, out of my 10%-15% target)

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Goodness... overcompensating much?

And whose fault do you think it is?

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A shame.

I pulled her instead:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/ii27af/people_really_need_to_stop_being_lazy_and/

jwo9bmuwvoj51.jpg

Ah, the memories...

 

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

A better question is why is all the fanart horny. All of it.

You think so?

 

One day i will resume reading the actual LP. Maybe.

 

Speaking of:

Spoiler
3 hours ago, Pengaius said:
5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Zlwrzu6j o

His life just jumped of a Clifford 

 

Thanks a lot, Pangasius!

tumblr_nqkdii1Pmz1s4cujlo1_540.gif

(And you even managed to mistype "off" there...)

Edited by Golb89

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51 minutes ago, Golb89 said:

Thanks a lot, Pangasius!

tumblr_nqkdii1Pmz1s4cujlo1_540.gif

(And you even managed to mistype "off" there...)

Whoopsie daisy, sorry about that didn't know you weren't caught up. 

 

 

-Pangasius out

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[Addendums/Edits]

Spoiler
On 8/28/2020 at 12:23 AM, Golb89 said:

(I didn't actually burn all of my premium currency on her banner: that'll be the case in the next one instead)

Updated the link.

(I actually included this in the previous comment, but then i accidentally deleted it without noticing and now i can no longer edit it back.

 

4 hours ago, Golb89 said:

I pulled her instead:

https://www.reddit.com/r/0sanitymemes/comments/iijz28/am_i_the_only_one_who_thinks_of_this/

myyq9urmiuj51.jpg

4 hours ago, Golb89 said:

(This time there was nothing i could do, as this was posted after my comment became uneditable)

 

3 hours ago, Pengaius said:

Whoopsie daisy, sorry about that didn't know you weren't caught up. 

Pretty sure NOONE was caught up before you posted that.

Edited by Golb89

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Spoiler
13 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

 

Lgjkwhcy oYou know, Kramer, I would hope I won't lose anyone in a map as simple as this one. That would be profoundly embarrassing.

I see foreshadowing.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I think it's about time we addressed the elephant in the room.

L0swryta o

This guy.

Elephent Bandit.
He almost looks like a recruitable edgelord.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bda25u8h oHey, guy!

Hiyigysd oWassup?

Bda25u8h oFancy sword!

Hiyigysd oThanks! Wanna see how it works?

Bda25u8h oI'd love to!

Hiyigysd oOkay, here I come!

Is this even provoking him, or just encouragement?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Zlwrzu6j oCofdkvyb o

......

You know, this almost sounds like a joke. "Did you hear? There was a guy so bad at Berwick Saga, he lost Clifford in Stolen Sword!" Who would ever believe that? It's such an absurd scenario! Most powerful unit in the game, gone in this short and easy fucking map.

Honestly, it's laughable. Or at least I laughed. Free Clifford, folks. Sure was worth training Ruby the whole game for this. Ahahahahah... hahah...

There's some irony that Clifford was worried about Ruby dying... but died instead.
Also, now that Ward's lost his daughter and Ruby her father, maybe Ward can adopt Ruby?... wait.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Akunlt52 oUq3ratfl o

Still provoked... Holy shit, this has to be the longest provocation I've ever seen in this game. It just refuses to go away! All the better for me, of course, but... Clifford's still dead.

It's because he got a major confidence boost from Thaddy's words of encouragement, and is eager to show him what the sword does.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Wcxlclgx oU89wptj4 o

Hurray. We got it. But at what cost?

Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the Albatross
About my neck was hung. ~ The Rime of the Ancient Mariner,  when the curse was placed on said Mariner.

Now if my health were usual, I'd modify the poem to relate to the situation, but dear lord is it a long poem to re-write when your head pounds and throat aches... so I'll have to settle for direct quote. Perhaps for the best. This chapter's too short to write a whole poem on... and it wouldn't be right to do it without the sequence where the albatross is removed... which obviously would be the Erzheimer scene.

4 hours ago, Golb89 said:

Pretty sure NOONE was caught up before you posted that.

I got lucky, because I read the whole thing before doing replies this time because I'm a little out of it lately (couldn't you tell?). Total fluke. Though... if you happen to be able to use control f (that is if you're on a computer), you might be able to skip back to where you were. This would make it easier to avoid spoilers in the comments. If you're on a phone, I have no advice. But I hope that's of some use.

10 hours ago, Dayni said:

RIP bad parents Albertus and Margaret.

Seems to be the chapter's theme that people who failed in their duties as protectors die this time, be it parents like Clifford, Albertus and Margaret... or a retainer like Pretzel. I kind of feel a degree of pity for them, in the sense it means they never will get to adequately make up for their mistakes.... or in Pretzel's case even acknowledge he made them. Mind, I fully get if you feel different. They were pretty severe mistakes.

11 hours ago, Benice said:

Ah, the classic "Corona" style-cut. Totally in style right now.

Personally I just prefer the "Grigori Rasputin" look. I mean, if I got the eyes.. I may as well try to steal the beard and hair... and I've got the genetics for it.


 

 

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2 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

The Rime of the Ancient Mariner,  when the curse was placed on said Mariner.

You know, this reminds me of an old joke that goes as follows:

The Ancient Mariner was a terrible goaltender. We know this, because the poem opens, "It is an ancient mariner, and he stoppeth one of three."

Ahaha, pretty good, am I ri-

OH GOD, HERE COMES THE LYNCH MOB!

4 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

Personally I just prefer the "Grigori Rasputin" look. I mean, if I got the eyes.. I may as well try to steal the beard and hair... and I've got the genetics for it.

Grr! I wish I had a beard like that! Instead I get heckin' neck hair!

7 minutes ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

Elephent Bandit.

OURGH

 

 

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9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, I love it, don't get me wrong. It is a quite flawed game, but it has plenty of strengths:

(I read them all, just not quoting them) I see then

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

a literal friggin' tank... It's great.

I do remember seeing the tank from the little bit I did see of the LP, I remember saying some stuff in there too.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

No's. Please's.

Then's I's Guess's I's won't's do's it's again's.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ahahahahahah... One of these days I'll have to get around to making the divorce arc for that. With Gotoh as the lawyer.

Hehehe, sounds funny.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

One issue I've always had with the idea of God is... How arrogant do we humans have to be to believe that everything was created by a big man sitting in the sky? Chances are, if there really is a creator, it looks more like a Lovecraftian abomination, the mere sight of which would fry our brains if we were to ever lay eyes upon it.

I mean we were made to his liking according to the bible. That doesn't mean an exact replica but I don't think he'll look like a fish or whatever else (I know it's not what you said, it's just an example) either.

I take more of a problem to the fact he can solve the world's problems and doesn't? Like what's the point of making Venezuelans or Africans suffer? Maybe God himself doesn't know what the fuck we humans did with politics lmao.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Indeed, those priests I quite respect. A shame about... all the other ones.

I wonder what the ratio is, like is it more good priests than bad ones or the other way around?

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Recommendation duly noted.

Yeah I'm telling you, the creator is like a Lunatic Reverse FE12 dude so if good gameplay is for you go for it. The game lets you customize the gameplay at the start like with 100% hit and/or crit, or minimum growths or 0% growths or reverse mode! The intended mode is Lunatic Reverse but it has been beaten on 0% Luna Reverse and 100% Hit and Crit... yeah it's insane but it gives you the tools for it.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That went... places. Also, I like the reference. I have played Days of Ruin, and though I never got too far for the same reason I've never gotten too far into any Advance Wars (somehow I always seem to get irremediably stuck in endless stalemates), I do get the reference.

The vietzeimer wars lol. And yeah AW can just become long and... long lol. 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Whaaa? Really, Himler is a historical figure? I didn't know that! Must be some really obscure guy... It's not as if he was, like, the right hand man of one of the most terrible figures of last century's history! You sure he's not just a Shadow Dragon boss?

I uh... well you never know who may not... I mean I knew he was Hitler's right hand man, I just don't know much about it so I guess I assumed you didn't... 

you got me at the start btw, thought it wasn't sarcasm.

Quote

Not quite the reference I was going for. But it's fine. I wouldn't expect many in this thread to get references to that game. In fact, the box titles from the previous update are also a reference to that one.

Which game is it then? Hmm....

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Can't say it's been done. Not entirely sure what you mean with "libertarian". You want me to make an edit with an "evil capitalist" caricature, is that it?

More so like the type of guy that is "If I can buy it then it's legal" or sth... I mean he isn't shown to be evil just super collector so it probably wouldn't work.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Good afternoon, at the time of writing!

Good night at the time of me writing this, which equates to well like 5 AM over there, so in 2 or 3 or like 6 hours idk what your sleep habits are you'll be up and running!

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Orange. Which, in real life, we call red hair, so... Yes. He's a redhead.

Wh-wha-what?! Kramer! No, his hair I mean it has a bit of Orange I can see but the bulk of his hair is... not yellow? Wh-how fucked up is my color perception? At this point idk if it's colorblindness or I need to go back to kindergarten. I'm telling you I do see orange in his sprite but not his portrait I... damn.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It is... a pretty interesting country. I want to believe not everyone who lives there is like this.

In the US? Well yeah, it's very disconnected. It's the center of the world nowadays but the people there live pretty differently.

In Mexico we definitely aren't on a dictatorship (more or less a controversial president loved by one half and hated by the other because he's left-wing and not right-wing) and not everyone is brown, though it depends on whether it's north or south u are speaking of. But it's got a mixture of both, not in proportional amounts though.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

But I love this song! Awww....!

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Dbvjlugj o

Prte9f55 oWe can't allow them to escape! Even if it costs us our lives, we must rescue the sword of Alcyone!

Shut the hell up, I'm still trying to figure out your hair color... I guess in a way it is orange? Ah... rrr!

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Wh8nud9h o

We've got the legendary sword of Alcyone! Its description reveals that the Berwick League is... surprisingly young, actually. Only five centuries?

Quite interesting, definitely.

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
C5c5mfo2 o

For starters, this fucker is terrifying. I'm not sure why he doesn't have a name, he even has a face. He has no skills other than Blade, but he does have a fuckton of speed and two incredibly scary swords.

Reminds me of the guy whose name is imperial and he had a portrait and all (I think I came back on the update we saw him) but only difference is that guy sucked.

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is giving me flashbacks to FE6... I really hope this won't be like Lilina and her angelic robe. I think I went like 5 or 6 friggin' chapters without ever remembering to give her the damn thing...

Pfft lol hahaha... that sounds funny but I know it's not fun to be reminded of it...

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bda25u8h oHey, guy!

Hiyigysd oWassup?

Bda25u8h oFancy sword!

Hiyigysd oThanks! Wanna see how it works?

Bda25u8h oI'd love to!

Hiyigysd oOkay, here I come!

Lol, and after he stabs Thaddy he goes "Well that's it man, wanna go get a sandwich?"

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Fuusvlkg o

What? Derrick? Please... as if you could--

Jdo3k41t o

Hah!

Damn it stop scaring me by cutting off sentenc-

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Hwiqlyow oEe7vngpv o

C'MON, REALLY!? HE BROKE HIS SHIELD AND THEN ADEPTED HIM! What a load of bull...

Never mind then.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Zlwrzu6j oCofdkvyb o

......

You know, this almost sounds like a joke. "Did you hear? There was a guy so bad at Berwick Saga, he lost Clifford in Stolen Sword!" Who would ever believe that? It's such an absurd scenario! Most powerful unit in the game, gone in this short and easy fucking map.

Honestly, it's laughable. Or at least I laughed. Free Clifford, folks. Sure was worth training Ruby the whole game for this. Ahahahahah... hahah...

Bruh I just have no idea what the hell. Like how did this map go so wrong? Was it deploying Derrick or sth? Hot damn.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...I might have to seriously consider promoting Adel now, though. Lances are so much fun, and now I've lost them... If ever I find a very high-defense enemy that I can disarm, I'll be sure to spent 200 turns just whacking away with Adel until he gets to 30 spear rank. I know no other way to do it.

What were the exact things Adel needed for promotion? And also how good is his promotion? I know a few points in strength aren't that much in Berwick when your damage output comes from weapons (I think).

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Shut up Kramer.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

All right. That was that. I, uh... I...

Holy shit, that was quite possibly the most embarrassing display of utter incompetence in my entire LPing career. I don't think I'll ever be able to one-up this. At least the times I lost 5 units in one chapter, they were all bad units in tough chapters. Not, y'know... Clifford in Stolen Sword. And it was entirely my fault, too. Easily preventable, by simply moving him out of sleep range. One single action was all it would've taken. But no. Gotta attack axe guy with sword guy.

Wait until I LP FE7 HHM Ironman Ranked. Yeah unless I pull it off somehow, I'm not getting the 5 star survival like that... that is if I ever wanna play FE7 too.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...Ah, fuck me... Well, to those of you patient enough to deal with my crap, I say farewell. Next time we do things or something.

Farewell, or good evening I suppose. I didn't write all of this in one update since I got sleepy.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:
Ficcmaoy o
 
Fpzljrkg o

2 things.

1.- I can't be the only one who thinks Arran has massive lips in these right?
2.- There's a jump in numbers again, yes I really did check.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Zhwbwo7n o

I_AM_NOT_A_MORON.png kek.

19 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

To be continued

Just one number mistake, but because that one is wrong the remaining are wrnog too so around 70 mistakse (And well Ruebhen went from wtf is your deal to WTF IS YOUR DEAL?

 

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[Addendums/Edits. Yes, again]

Spoiler
On 8/28/2020 at 8:00 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Goodness... overcompensating much?

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/iisgma/fist_of_the_rabbit/

60qspato1yj51.jpg

 

On 8/28/2020 at 8:00 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

A shame.

She wouldn't have lasted long here anyway...

... maybe.

 

18 hours ago, Golb89 said:
On 8/28/2020 at 8:00 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

A better question is why is all the fanart horny. All of it.

You think so?

(Updated the link)

 

[Replies]

Spoiler
9 hours ago, The Roger The Paladin said:

I got lucky, because I read the whole thing before doing replies this time because I'm a little out of it lately (couldn't you tell?).

https://www.reddit.com/r/arknights/comments/gvcfc4/waking_up_to_sunshine/

nxkge367ej251.jpg

 

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[Addendum of the above, because the site just decided i couldn't edit it anymore AFTER LITERALLY JUST ONE [email protected] MINUTE]

Spoiler
On 8/28/2020 at 8:00 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

That's what my friend told me to convince me, too.

So far he has not succeeded.

He just wasn't trying hard enough:

89065fd6-9002-4b53-bbbf-de349ff51815.jpg

Maybe.

 

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See, this is why you bring a healer in every map no matter how easy it may seem, especially in this game. This reminded me so much of me playing this map for the first time, I had a sleeping Larentia, Arthur and Sherpa...all three died to the sleep guy, atleast I wasn't doing an ironman. Losing your only lancer was rough but your Adel and Leon are doing much better than mine at this point, so you might still be able to get one of them to promote.

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