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WeAreNewcastle1053

Crime and Punishment - Fire Emblem edition!

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Sothe and Ike's children egg your house on halloween day.

I don't like Claude or Lysithea in Three houses

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Claude and Lysithea kidnap you in the middle of the night, making you experience Lysithea back story trauma and then feed you to the Windcaller.

......well that was the plan but Claude kept talking to Lysithea like a baby and appeared to think she was five, so Lysithea’s dark spikes put an end to that.

I like fe7.

Edited by Sooks1016

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You’re a man of culture.

You have to play FE6 HM until you love it, which will never happen.

I love roasting Sigurd with hot jokes.

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Now YOU become the center of a roast.  And not the comedic kind either.

Real talk, I actually can't name any FE characters that really bring my blood to a boil or make me want to see them suffer very badly.  I'd probably even like the Hoshidan characters if they joined or cooperated with Nohr.

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You're thrown out of the FE fandom as a heretic for having such a reasonable, neutral perspective.

I unironically like Fates: Birthright.

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You get disappointed by this forum game for expecting a harsh punishment for having an opinion.
Take that! XD

I think it would be funny if every attack and death animation in FE was accompanied by goofy cartoon sound effects.

Edited by DragonFlames

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You do an ironman and have to hear those sound effects a lot.

I expected the spanish inquisition.

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This thread turns into Crime and Punishment - Regular edition! instead.
And also, all fans of Mercenaries bombard you with increasingly meaningless counterarguments.

I confessed to all my FE related crimes.

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You still haven't played Berwick and you now have to do it on my 17-year-old computer that can barely run GBA games.

I want to create a topic about why axes are good in FE6.

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SF goes glitchy on you and you can't perpetuate your lies post your thread.

I immediately bench useless units like Rolf.

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Every time you try to use Shinon in either game he will get massively stat screwed

 

 

I bench Seth because FE8 allows me to train anyone and he feels like a waste of a spot

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Eirika goes on strike and won’t let you deploy her until you let her fight alongside her hubby. She’s still a lord that needs deployment though.

I bought the three houses dlc.

Edited by Sooks1016

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The contents of Cindered Shadows are so disturbing to you that you need major therapy.

I blocked some person on reddit who didn't like my pairings.

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All of their pairings become canon, and all interactions between yours are stripped from the original media.

I married Camilla.

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You can never escape her, and spend the rest of your years locked in a room regretting your decisions.

I gave dorcas all Speedwings in my first playthrough of FE7, and trusted old gamefaq discussions for advice.

Edited by Hello72207

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Whenever you play fe7, Dorcas will kill every unit as soon as they join, making you solo the game with him. However random gamefaqs users decide your every move on every turn.

In my first play through of fe7 I didn’t use a single flyer except for Vaida because base Florina and Heath convinced me that fliers were bad (also Lyn mode basically says pegs weak lmao if I recall correctly).

Edited by Sooks1016

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Florina makes you feel guilty as you're forced to watch her curl up in a corner and cry from neglect.

I make Jill kill Shiharam.

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36 minutes ago, Sooks1016 said:

also Lyn mode basically says pegs weak lmao if I recall correctly

Yeah, pretty much. Florina does not make a good first impression...

Jill actually switches sides because of it. (Which does happen, by the way!)

I didn't recruit Esteban in my first playthrough of Berwick, which means...Oof...Bad things for Arina...Reeeeaaallly bad things...

Edited by Benice

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Just now, Benice said:

Jill actually switches sides because of it. (Which does happen, by the way!)

Only if she doesn't have an A support with MIst though.

I dunno. Esteban becomes Estebad and joins the villains?

I make Ephraim x Eirika canon.

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1 minute ago, twilitfalchion said:

I dunno. Esteban becomes Estebad and joins the villains?

No...No, it's...It's way worse... Just... Just make sure you recruit Esteban if you every play Berwick, okay? Please. Do it for Arina. If you wanna see the event for the chapter, there is this playthrough of it. It occurs about...28 or so minutes in? This was the beta english patch, some stuff was changed in the finished one.

Renais gets messed up from the incest and there is a bad sequel to FE8.

I feel bad for Kostas.

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The Flame Emperor never stops talking about how you must steel yourself. Ever.

I should probably be asleep right now.

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But you're awake and get to play forum games.

I might consider playing Tear Ring Saga again.

Edited by twilitfalchion

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