Don't know what to do with all my free time

[♠Soul♠]

I've had this problem for years, in which I really don't know how to use all my free time. It's like I have these vague idea of what I want to do, but I never actually do them. Instead, either I just end up idling on the couch with the TV on- or worse, and I end up in my room, in front of my computer and the hours go by. Before I know it, it's like 3-4 a.m and I haven't done anything I actually wanted to, and I'm too tired and call it a day.

It's always "well, maybe next time, it's already late", while I just end up wishing the day away in a cycle that's been for years. I don't want to be in front of a computer or idling on the couch just for the sake of it. I have tons of games I haven't even begun to play, and I struggle to do it because of this compulsive behaviours. I've had mangas in my bookshelf I haven't actually read in years, and actual books untouched.

I hate this.

[whase]

It's no miracle cure, but I found it helps to tell other people your plans. If friends or family occasionally check up on you, you might feel more inclined to actually do stuff.

That or dedicate specific periods of the day to be no-tv times. I used to always game in the morning before school, but I decided no computer or tv in the morning. Now I actually work on my cosplay or other creative projects every morning for half an hour before work. Again no miracle cure, but every small bit counts.

And don't beat yourself up for not getting things done, at least for me that only makes it harder to do better next time. Accept what happened and focus on the future.

Hope this slightly helps 😃

[Sidereal Wraith]

Try listening to audiobooks when doing other activities. That's what works for me. 

 

 

Edited July 10, 2020 by Wraith

[♠Soul♠]

1 hour ago, whase said:

It's no miracle cure, but I found it helps to tell other people your plans. If friends or family occasionally check up on you, you might feel more inclined to actually do stuff.

That or dedicate specific periods of the day to be no-tv times. I used to always game in the morning before school, but I decided no computer or tv in the morning. Now I actually work on my cosplay or other creative projects every morning for half an hour before work. Again no miracle cure, but every small bit counts.

And don't beat yourself up for not getting things done, at least for me that only makes it harder to do better next time. Accept what happened and focus on the future.

Hope this slightly helps 😃

hi whase!!!!!

I could try that... today (after I actually go to sleep), I'd like to:

 

- Abstain from social media (includes stuff like Discord and idly looking Youtube videos) as much as I can.

- Actually play a game or two...that isn't Smash. I really need to beat Breath of the Wild one day.

- Read one of my books or mangas. Doesn't have to be a lot. I just need to get back into it.

- Excercise, because I've really been slacking.

 

I'll report during the day and you'll see if I managed to do some of these.

 

55 minutes ago, Wraith said:

Try listening to audiobooks when doing other activities. That's what works for me. 

 

I don't know about audiobooks, but I do listen to certain videos that I don't necessarily need to watch. I do this a decent bit. The thing about audiobooks, I'd honestly just rather actually read one. I feel like I'll really just be spreading my attention thin and not fully enjoying it, and I want to get to a point where I'm not multitasking. It's not really a good habit, and it teaches you not to enjoy things at the moment.

[MisterIceTeaPeach]

Working.

[Excellen Browning]

I'll be blunt and say there's nothing wrong with milling about in your free time.

[Solvaij]

I understand how you feel. It's super easy to get sucked into a hole and then be too tired to do the things you want to do. You might try picking out the biggest wastes of time (youtube, social media, whatever else you want to cut out) and decide to only do them at certain times or on certain days. Recently I've been trying to play video games only on Sundays so I can work on other projects, and it's helped a lot. Maybe make lists too? I'm very guilty of making schedules and then not following through with them, but it can still be motivating to at least know what it is you want to accomplish on a given day. I also want to second the person who said to tell people your plans. That can be a huge help.

[♠Soul♠]

5 hours ago, Solvaij said:

I understand how you feel. It's super easy to get sucked into a hole and then be too tired to do the things you want to do. You might try picking out the biggest wastes of time (youtube, social media, whatever else you want to cut out) and decide to only do them at certain times or on certain days. Recently I've been trying to play video games only on Sundays so I can work on other projects, and it's helped a lot. Maybe make lists too? I'm very guilty of making schedules and then not following through with them, but it can still be motivating to at least know what it is you want to accomplish on a given day. I also want to second the person who said to tell people your plans. That can be a huge help.

I wish I could play games like other people do. They just get automatically drawn and are able to sit there for hours. The only exception for that is Smash, but that's mostly because I play competitively. I have trouble simply sitting down and being able to play and get immersed.

I went to sleep at like 10 a.m this morning, and I woke up past 5 p.m. Can't say I've gotten started yet, but at least I can make an effort and not do the things I mentioned.

Night is still young, so there's plenty of time for things like excercise, some of the games I mentioned and things like that.

[Solvaij]

14 minutes ago, Crime and Punishment said:

I wish I could play games like other people do. They just get automatically drawn and are able to sit there for hours. The only exception for that is Smash, but that's mostly because I play competitively. I have trouble simply sitting down and being able to play and get immersed.

I went to sleep at like 10 a.m this morning, and I woke up past 5 p.m. Can't say I've gotten started yet, but at least I can make an effort and not do the things I mentioned.

Night is still young, so there's plenty of time for things like excercise, some of the games I mentioned and things like that.

Well best of luck to you. It's super cool that you play Smash competitively!

[XRay]

You seem like you need a Hubert at your side to nag you to do things.

[Zanarkin]

9 hours ago, Excellen Browning said:

I'll be blunt and say there's nothing wrong with milling about in your free time.

 

[whase]

On 7/10/2020 at 11:44 AM, Crime and Punishment said:

I'll report during the day and you'll see if I managed to do some of these.

So how did it go? =3

[♠Soul♠]

On 7/10/2020 at 11:05 AM, Excellen Browning said:

I'll be blunt and say there's nothing wrong with milling about in your free time.

I disrespectfully disagree. Having a lot of time isn't as good when you don't know how to use it. Someone can have half as much free time as I do but know how to use it and enjoy their time. If you're on the computer or celphone all day just watching random videos and constantly on social media, you may as well not have that time if you're just numbing your mind with that stuff.

Reminds me of a certain video I watched before:

It's a lot like that, sadly.

On 7/10/2020 at 7:21 PM, Solvaij said:

Well best of luck to you. It's super cool that you play Smash competitively!

It's not.

10 hours ago, whase said:

So how did it go? =3

I managed to excercise the other day. It was like 4 a.m, but it's something...and that's about it. I need to try again.

Thanks for asking.

[Excellen Browning]

1 hour ago, Crime and Punishment said:

I disrespectfully disagree. Having a lot of time isn't as good when you don't know how to use it. Someone can have half as much free time as I do but know how to use it and enjoy their time. If you're on the computer or celphone all day just watching random videos and constantly on social media, you may as well not have that time if you're just numbing your mind with that stuff.

Reminds me of a certain video I watched before:

 

No it really isn't and the only thing that you're achieving by thinking like this is feeling bad about yourself, seeing yourself as a fuck up, or even an impostor. 

[whase]

23 hours ago, Crime and Punishment said:

If you're on the computer or celphone all day just watching random videos and constantly on social media, you may as well not have that time if you're just numbing your mind with that stuff.

Nothing wrong with watching random videos or social media if you enjoy your time doing those, even if it does somewhat numb your mind. But if you notice you're not enjoying that time, you should probably change what you're putting your time into. Having a good time is a very good use of time though, never forget that.

23 hours ago, Crime and Punishment said:

I managed to excercise the other day. It was like 4 a.m, but it's something...and that's about it. I need to try again.

Excercise is good. That sounds like a win to me. Next time try to get a slightly bigger win, step by step is the best kind of change. =3

[♠Soul♠]

10 hours ago, whase said:

Nothing wrong with watching random videos or social media if you enjoy your time doing those, even if it does somewhat numb your mind. But if you notice you're not enjoying that time, you should probably change what you're putting your time into. Having a good time is a very good use of time though, never forget that.

I don't really count simply getting constant dopamine hit as "enjoyment". When you truly enjoy something, it doesn't feel like a waste of time.

10 hours ago, whase said:

Excercise is good. That sounds like a win to me. Next time try to get a slightly bigger win, step by step is the best kind of change. =3

Yeah. New day to try again.

[XRay]

2 hours ago, Crime and Punishment said:

I don't really count simply getting constant dopamine hit as "enjoyment". When you truly enjoy something, it doesn't feel like a waste of time.

People need time to wind down, relax, and recharge. Sleeping helps with some of that, but often times people need more than that, so they need to relax while being awake and simply do nothing and laze around.

Edelgard is pretty much the definition of all work and no play, and despite her head strong appearance, I think she is mentally spent and exhausted and she relies on Hubert to drag her around throughout the day and help her complete her duties as an imperial princess.