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I never felt like I belonged in this world


♠Soul♠
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Ever since I was of a certain age, a part of me started feeling like I don't really belong in this world. Literally? Not literally? Maybe both. I'm not going to get into what is and isn't possible, because that's not the point. It just feels as if you're so different from the way people are thinking or acting, and it feels as if there's no way you'd really understand why they do the things they do. Like how people get into dumb arguements and fights over nothing, or things like reputation or ego.

I realise; I simply don't care. I don't care about titles, your degree, what you do or how much money or "status" you have. I don't care about how I am supposed to look at people into the eye or whatever, and I don't care for getting into dumb fights because someone supposedly looked at me in a certain way.

 

I'm not really depressed, or necessarily unhappy as I express this. If anything, it's somewhat liberating. My biggest concern in living among this society is in how I should I really go about into life. On one hand, I don't want to waste time doing nonsense (like all the above I mentioned), but I also don't want to be a spineless coward as to nod my head and burrow my head in silence.

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2 hours ago, the actual real soul said:

It just feels as if you're so different from the way people are thinking or acting, and it feels as if there's no way you'd really understand why they do the things they do.

This is an illusion.

We think we're special, but the only person anyone has ever been is who they are, so how would you really know the degree to which you are like or unlike others? The resulting confusion resulting from this limited reference frame is often misinterpreted being cosmically unique, when only Jesus was ever all that different from everyone else.

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I didn't think I belonged at the dinner table since all the seats were taken. But then I pulled up a seat and sat down where there was room for me.

Oh, this isn't FftF so I probably have to explain myself. Basically the world is too big to make grand statements about what does or doesn't belong. But by my estimation, there is a lot of room for what does belong and some people will even make room for your nonsense if you're lucky. So just live your best life, don't interfere with other peoples' best lives where you can help it, and if something doesn't feel right, move on from it. If you're really curious about why people act the way they do, try to imagine life in their shoes for a moment, or go out of your comfort zone for a day. At best you learn about something you were missing in life. At worst, you're better at empathizing with that person's individual concerns. Either way your horizons have been broadened.

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I can’t say anything about what may or may not be up, but what I most certainly can tell you is that the world isn’t like that.

5 hours ago, the actual real soul said:

It just feels as if you're so different from the way people are thinking or acting, and it feels as if there's no way you'd really understand why they do the things they do. Like how people get into dumb arguements and fights over nothing, or things like reputation or ego.

You are far from the only person like this. People are very very very different, I know someone who has lamented about the latter thing for example. And I’m not just talking about a couple oddballs, I mean I know and know off a lot of people like that. They might not be around you, but they’re out there. Being around a lot of one type of person tends to breed everyone thinking the same, and so if that somehow came about, whether as a family, the same place of employment, etc. ideologies and natures can somewhat start to lapse. But that doesn’t mean no one different exists of course, they’re just beyond the horizon.

So yes you do belong, there are people like you I promise, and even if there weren’t, people are different. That’s how conflict comes about in the first place, usually.

Lastly, if you want to try to understand, you could just ask these people. 

5 hours ago, the actual real soul said:

I realise; I simply don't care. I don't care about titles, your degree, what you do or how much money or "status" you have. I don't care about how I am supposed to look at people into the eye or whatever, and I don't care for getting into dumb fights because someone supposedly looked at me in a certain way.

Yep, this is not rare, and I say we need more of it, so heck yes you belong. In any case, it is most certainly not a bad thing, although I do happen to be a random guy on the internet, so...

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What's up soul, you've long reminded me of myself and that probably means you're autistic like me. 

That you feel you don't belong but are happy is okay. 

If you ever feel like you need some belonging or understanding though, hit up some autistic groups or forums.

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On 11/24/2020 at 8:28 PM, the actual real soul said:

On the one hand, I don't want to waste time doing nonsense (like all the above I mentioned), 

My advice to you is to find something that fulfills you. I'd suggest reading classic literature for there is great wisdom that can be gleamed from those tomes of yore. 

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I think I mostly just needed to express that somewhere, since I hardly feel comfterble expressing that to people I actually know. And it's not like I'd be able to put it into the proper words, even if I did. There's always something more to be said.

It's true. In a way, what I say does feel like a sort of cop out from this, like I don't actively want to try and change or remedy the situation. In a way, anyway.

15 hours ago, Wraith said:

My advice to you is to find something that fulfills you. I'd suggest reading classic literature for there is great wisdom that can be gleamed from those tomes of yore. 

This is also a simple solution, in a way. I can't say I fully dedicated to something I really do enjoy...

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  • 1 month later...

I think you need a friend or a person agree with your point of view. Someone to look at the world in the same prism. My points of views are very different from others.  And I like that. I believe my view is right.  Also I have proofs to believe in it too.

I'm easily blend myself in a crowd. But I never argue my opposite point of view with others & try to prove I'm right. Because it's pointless, waste words & may lose relationship. You should be too.

Although I have so many good friends, but only 2 of them I consider real friends.  So it's good to have somebody have same thoughts, hobbies v....v... to share & have fun with each other. So you meet up with others, sign up online forum, you would soon find & know who have a same thoughts as you. Although I'm willing to be your friend & hear your interesting thoughts.
You said :

On 11/25/2020 at 3:28 AM, the actual real soul said:

I realise; I simply don't care. I don't care about titles, your degree, what you do or how much money or "status" you have. I don't care about how I am supposed to look at people into the eye or whatever, and I don't care for getting into dumb fights because someone supposedly looked at me in a certain way.

There is nothing wrong with it. Example I believe no one in my town or even my city waste their time in this forum like me. So does it make me dumb cause I'm not like the others & stop entering this forum ? No, why ? Because this is what I like. YOU HAVE TO FIND WHAT YOU LIKE TOO. 

 My father has gone through a great journey of his life. He used to be a a solder, a gangster, a manager, v...v.... Now he's enjoy peace to be alone rather than with anyone. He said he found peace since read Sutra, what Buddha said. 

 So I think there are 3 things here

1. You need friends that share your point of views

2. You need to think what you like in this life and willing to waste time your precious time to them

3. If you don't feel like anything in this world, I suggest you get into religions, read religion books. They will help you alot

 

You're not alone. Ther are many people have the same thoughts as yours. You just haven't met them yet.

Just freely send message to me. I think we can help each other.

Edited by Hasechi
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  • 3 months later...
On 11/25/2020 at 1:45 AM, Armchair General said:

Go see an psychologist and get diagnosed @the actual real soul it'll open a door or two for you, which is a lot more than screaming into the void would accomplish. Health has deteriorated sharply? On https://cashloansnearby.com/texas/fort-worth/ you can find out where the nearest cash loans in your city

I still agree with the General that visiting a psychotherapist will be clearly useful. Your condition is not necessarily a diagnosis, but a specialist will help you feel happier and more comfortable.

Edited by LissieS
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I can definitely relate, largely due to my struggles with socializing. Despite the efforts I've put in to fit in, I seem to only get along in society by being super-submissive.

 

While I've tried to understand the hows and whys of what people do when interacting with each other, my attempts far too often end in failure. When I make mistakes socially, people would much rather yell at me than be constructive. And I have a hard time trusting my own family to teach me how to properly get along in society, due to... issues.

 

I'm glad I had the courage to get a therapist to help out with these social challenges, that make me feel like I just don't belong.

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