Progenitus Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Proof: a conversation in chapter 11 Eph-route. Ephraim: Alright, so here we have the gayest chapter in FE8, if that was possible in this game. We have FoW and a bunch of flying enemies coming from all directions and we have to cross the entire map so we can recruit L'arachel and Dozla before they die. Who's with me? Franz: I'm good, but I don't really want to face more than 4 or so enemies. Kyle: Me too. Forde: Me three. Ephraim: **** you guys. Seth: I'm up to the task, but I'm only one unit. Gilliam: I can survive, but my spd is terrible and I never double anything. Garcia: My speed is almost as bad but I have 10 less def. Ross: I wish I could be as good as my dad! Moulder: I'm MOULDAH THE BOULDAH, but unfortunately I can't counter. Natasha: I can heal! Tana: I can fly! Amelia: I can be cannon fodder! Vanessa: I'm still building my supports and I can't survive without them. Lute: Me too! Artur: I'm Lute with less durability. Neimi: What's 1-range? Is it something you can write with? Colm: I can see through the fog, and that's about it. Joshua: I'm like Colm without seeing through the fog. Cormag: The mogalls are going to slaughter me. Duessel: I have 17 base def and 41 HP and 17 str and 12 spd and 15 inch penis. I mean con. 15 con. I even have 9 res so I laugh at the mogalls. Franz: WTF? What is this gayness? Seth: 17 def? Even I don't have that much! Duessel: That's what you get for soloing the last 10 chapters, Seth. Now it's my turn to solo some maps. Ephraim: Okay everyone, we're all out of a job. Let's pack our bags and go home and leave everything to Chuck Norris. Monsters: YEAH RIGHT! IF WE ATTACK HIM AT THE SAME TIME HE'LL SURELY DIE. Duessel: *strokes beard* *monsters fall dead* Everyone else: FFFFFFFFFF- Dozla: WTF? I have a beard! How come I'm not as good? Duessel: You're goddamn Gimli, you're only for comic relief. Later on in the game... Kyle: Aha! I suppose your high base level has caught up to you now, huh? Duessel: I don't care. Neimi: What? But your spd is bad! Duessel: I have anima affinity and two great supports with both Cormag and Ephraim, which will give me a huge amount of att and avoid with some def to pad my 17 base def even more. Joshua: WTF? Why do you AND Seth have anima affinity and mounts? Are you two related? Duessel: Oh, and I also have A-ranks in swords, lances, and axes, which means I can S-Rank any weapon type i want, as well as use more or less every weapon in the game. And Garm gives me +5 spd, which is my only problem stat, and the only other axe users who can realistically S-rank axes are bad and won't be used often enough to worry. And if that wasn't enough, I can use brave weapons lying around with little to no AS loss thanks to my 15 con. I mean penis. No, I mean con. Everyone else: FFFFFFFFF- Seth: Why do you have so much def? Duessel: I'm actually Sedgar's cousin. Seth: Damn, I can't compete with that. Moral of the story: Don't screw around with 17 base def, anima affinity, and access to every weapon in the game, including wtfgarm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ether Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 (edited) It's true.Duessel is rather ridiculous.After all,he has the highest Def growth in the game besides Gilliam and lolMyrrh.(Seriously,a loli with a 150% def growth!?,Now THAT`s Ridiculous) Edited September 1, 2009 by Ether Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dat Nick Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Inb4 Mekkah complains Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mekkah Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 6/10 would have been better with Eirika: Why do I not get an amazing prepromote on my route? Saleh: :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quasar Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 In after Mekkah doesn't really complain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colonel M Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Duessel is king of FE8. (Does a background check if he really is Sedgar's cousin). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ether Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Duessel is king of FE8. (Does a background check if he really is Sedgar's cousin). Soon the need to do such a background check is gone,as Sedgar enters the room and hands his "favorite cousin" a keg of whiskey.That's right,a whole fucking Keg! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dat Nick Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Speaking of Zag, I'm sure I've mentioned how badly I wish we had Smash's epic around in the FEDS tier, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CATS Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 6/10 would have been better with Eirika: Why do I not get an amazing prepromote on my route? Saleh: :( And lolInnes gets completely forgotten. Poor guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Progenitus Posted September 1, 2009 Author Share Posted September 1, 2009 Duessel's sheer w1n was split into two separate entities on Eirika route, which is why you get Innes and Saleh but neither of them being as awesome as Duessel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CATS Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Interestingtheory. Saleh has Duessel's use of 3 weapon types, while Innes has his near-complete monopoly over a single weapon type. I think you might be on to something here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candlejack Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Actually, Duessel is probably Sedgar's great-uncle. And Haar is his nephew, and Sedgar's distant brother. Sety is also Duessel's cousin twice removed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonBladeSniper Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 That pretty much sums him up. XD Innes is kinda usable in Eirika's route. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReformBlade Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I came. I read. I chuckled slightly... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about! Duessel is the man, Orson must be secobd . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Progenitus Posted September 22, 2009 Author Share Posted September 22, 2009 Interestingtheory. Saleh has Duessel's use of 3 weapon types, while Innes has his near-complete monopoly over a single weapon type. I think you might be on to something here. Affinity too. Duessel's affinity is anima. Att, def, avo Innes is ice. def, avo Saleh is wind. att. ice + wind = anima Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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