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What do you want/look for in a relationship?


Rehab

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Inspired by this couple-months-old article, though it isn't required reading by any means.

According to said article, what we actually expect to get from somebody else in a relationship is something we both don't necessarily know before entering one and something we can take a while to form as we get older. We may be less ready to share it with the person it concerns, because it's important to us while it might be simultaneously imposing on the other person. Unfortunately, it might also be one of the most important factors in deciding a relationship's ultimate destiny ooweeoo

Of course, this makes it the perfect thing to air out with strangers on the internet! Right?

I think I'd be kind of a bad choice to start off listing what I value in friends and relationships, because I'm neither really good at making them nor great at keeping them, but I do think I at least admire the ability to have a really open mind, to be able to try anything and see the merits of any idea, even if it's something one heavily disagrees with. Or at least an open imagination. Beyond that, it's kind of inconsistent territory.

(not sure if this is better suited for serious discussion)

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Personally, while I don't think I'm the type to actually pick and choose what kinds of friends I make --I don't think most can or do-- I do appreciate various qualities in a person. Obviously I like to associate with people that are at least familiar with many of my hobbies, but given that I have friends that are only dimly aware of the existence of anime, and think that videogames end at Call of Duty, I'd say it's certainly not any kind of a requirement. I suppose if I had to choose qualities in a friend or partner that I would want, I'd be looking for someone that has characteristics I want to have but find difficult to display. Someone with levity, a naive outlook, who loves to talk. People that are overly serious drain me on a daily basis, whether it's from work, school, or otherwise. The last thing I'd want is another me to discuss things with. :mellow:

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I look for a lot of things in a relationship. However, I'll only say one. She needs to know both the Valjean and Javert parts in The Confrontation from Les Miserables.

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Commonalities is nice, and having a brain is good too. I don't expect every one of my friends to be in MENSA (hell, I ain't, so that'd be hypocritical of me if I did), but I can't stand complete idiots who can't comprehend the simplest of logic.

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Girlfriend: Honesty, trustworthy, kindness, patience, commitment, acceptance, open-minded, respects herself, fun, has common interests, loves to talk, willing to sacrifice a little, cute (both physically attractive and cute personality), isn't an airhead, motivated to succeed in life, has a sense of humor. I'll probably think of more later.

Friendship: I can befriend just about any person, and it kinda just happens, but some things I like to have in a good friend are patience, trust, honesty, kindness, open-minded, someone who I know has my back, someone who can just chill even where there's nothing to do.

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Girlfriend: I'd definitely want someone more talkative than me and someone i feel comfortable talking with (but that's obvious). Honest, smart, patient, cute (not necessary), open minded, and can debate things with me without getting to overly sensitive about some topics. You know, like my family does when i discuss religion with them :facepalm:.

Friendship: Friends just seem to happen. I'm not even sure how i have any friends :mellow: ... In any case, most of the friends i have (atleast the ones i consider friends and not people i talk to on a semi regular basis) are rather honest and can discuss quite a variety of topics. They also (this only applies to male friends) aren't always going HURR-DURR THAT GIRL SO HOT... :/ seriously, i hate that to be honest. I have been around people who can only discuss that. And while there are very pretty women in my school (and outside of course), I have never understood why the circle of friends my brother has is the only thing they are able to discuss. Another thing is friends that you know can hang out with you while not necessarily have to get drunk. I was talking to my friend about this the other day (about the point of drinking) and he told me its because its kind of awkward to be around them without anything to do. Well whats the point of being around those people, if you have to be drunk not to be awkward.... Also a friend that actually isn't afraid to ask me to hang out. Honestly nobody ever does *forever alone* Of course my friends do know i do not drink beer or like any sort of social setting that can be called a party or where there are a bunch of strangers.

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And while there are very pretty women in my school (and outside of course), I have never understood why the circle of friends my brother has is the only thing they are able to discuss.

Well, I assume you mean that the circle of friends your brother has is only able to discuss women, and not that women are only able to discuss your brother and his circle of friends (which is basically what you said).

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Well, I assume you mean that the circle of friends your brother has is only able to discuss women, and not that women are only able to discuss your brother and his circle of friends (which is basically what you said).

I thought the previous sentences implied that i mean my brother's circle of friend can only discuss women.

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Nothing, I'm a loner and a little bit of a misanthrope. Even if i did find someone who tickled my fancy i wouldn't have to the courage to initiate a conversation with them because I'm afflicted with an intense social-phobia. I once went a whole month without having more then a 3 world conversation with anyone.

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I want someone who is both ambitious and able to keep up with me mentally. I've been told that this makes me out to be a shallow person, however that's not to say that I don't appreciate a man with a kind personality or humor. I enjoy those qualities immensely. But, I've dated some of the funniest and kindest guys I know, and that just doesn't count for much to me when I can't have an "adult" conversation with them, or they try too hard to be agreeable with everyone and come across as indecisive, or they're just too content and don't want to do anything with their future. There needs to be a balance somewhere between being down to earth but driven to find a purpose. Someone who's kind, but wants to make a difference in the world, even if it's small. You don't have to be a genius, and when I say "ambitious", I don't mean someone who's after money; just a person who wants to go out into the world and be someone.

As for looks, I've found that I don't really have a type, so to speak. If I think you're attractive, that's that. XD

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I want someone who's simple but also has a career/goals/etc, also she has to be sweet and attractive.. don't really care how funny they care, so long as they can respond well to sarcasm and dish it back out.

brown/black hair and dark brown/deep blue eyes

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