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Ottservia

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About Ottservia

  • Rank
    I love Severa far more than I reasonably should
  • Birthday January 24

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Somewhere I can't feel pain

Previous Fields

  • Favorite Fire Emblem Game
    Awakening

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  • Members
    Severa

Allegiance

  • I fight for...
    Ylisse

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  1. It's not that it wasn't self-explanatory cause it was just that more description as to what exactly was happening would've been nice like personally I would've written it like: Balnick prepared to drive his lance into the man, however his arm wouldn't budge. It simply hung in the air next to him as his fingers were wrapped tightly around the lance's shaft. He couldn't do it... Or y'know something like that. Does that make a little more sense?
  2. It's a Naruto thing. Basically it's a sort of meme in the community because It became something of a trend that Naruto was able to sway a lot villains in the show to becoming good guys simply through conversation(It goes a lot deeper than that but if I went into it we'd be here all day)
  3. I'm surprised by the lack of feedback this past week. I suppose everyone's been busy. I know I have but I found time to read a couple entries so here are some of my thoughts. @Anacybele Talk no jutsu! talk no jutsu! No seriously that pretty much sums up most of my thoughts on this whole thing. It's not a bad piece and I did enjoy it but I don't really see how it fits into the prompt. I mean I can sort of see what you were doing here but I think the main issue is the lack of sufficient build up either that or the pay off is lacking something. One or the other. I feel like you could've made Kael's anger a little more palpable or make it more ambiguous as to what he's going to say to Cissy before he says if that makes sense. I dunno something's missing from this piece and I don't know what. I enjoyed the story but the execution of how it fit into the prompt could've been better. @Benice This isn't a bad story but I have one major complaint here. If you want to write something emotional be descriptive. Like whenever you tried to play up the emotions, it only really lasted for like a sentence at most and that's the main issue here. If you want me to feel things then you gotta really dig into the character's thoughts and emotions to really truly draw them out. Don't just say he started sobbing and leave it at that. Give me more! You did a good job with the flashback because it's a good flashback but like really try to make me feel his sadness, his pain. When he can't bring down his lance to kill the rebel. Linger on that moment for a little more. Tell me everything that's going on inside his head. Why can't he bring down the lance? Does he want to but his body won't listen? what's going on here? Again if you want me to feel something here, you'll have to be a little more descriptive than " Blanick was a very strong man, but in that moment, he didn't have the power to lower his lance". It's a problem that's pretty persistent throughout the whole thing especially at the end. Other than that though, it's fine. I'll get to the other stories later
  4. Yeah honestly I just like to pretend those paralogues aren't canon. I don't think it ruins awakening's overall writing by any means(well except maybe the emmeryn one) but still they could've made Aversa recruitable without the retcon honestly. The only one I really like is the Gangrel one simply because Chrom's conversations with the guy are really good and showcase Chrom's growth ever since the first arc of the game. It's the reason I like Chrom a lot.
  5. The “joke” more or less is that Azura is forced to wear intimidating or ridiculous looking headwear to cover up her bad hair day
  6. Smolzura is like cutest thing on this planet. I WANT TO GIVE HER HEADPATS SO BADLY!!!!
  7. Mah boi finally getting that legendary glow up!!! It’s about damn time Chrom got a legendary. Lucina and Robin have had them for how long now? Man I’m definitely gonna pull
  8. Still doesn’t answer my question. How does learning the truth about crests connect with his overall goal of ending racism? I can see how uniting the continent would help with that, but how does knowing the truth about crests and the agarthans help with that? It really doesn’t as far as I’m aware.
  9. That doesn’t really answer my question though. How does finding Rhea and learning the truth about crests help further Claude’s goals in anyway? That is the question I am asking. I never said characters can’t have two different character arcs. I’m saying those arcs should connect and feed into one other which they don’t in this case as far as I can tell.
  10. And there highlights another problem with Claude. How does his backstory and overarching end goals(opening foldlan’s throat) fit into that goal. To my knowledge the two goals are completely separate from one another. How does finding out the truth really help with his other goal? They don’t connect. Why does he need to know the truth? How does knowing it help with his goal of opening relations with Almyra? Again I could be misremembering as it’s been a while since I’ve played VW but to my knowledge there isn’t an answer to those questions. It feels like two separate character arcs here that don’t really feed into one another which is a running problem with 3H’s story I noticed(looking at you Annette)
  11. I feel like the main problem with it is that Claude’s is not well represented thematically throughout the course of the story considering its basically just a copy of silver snow. What I mean is it’s a lot of tell not show to put it simply. There’s really no build up or pay off with his character. Every chapter doesn’t really have any significant meaning to his character. He’s just kinda there for the most part. What thematic significance to his character are we supposed to take away from the conflict with Miklan or Lanato. Nothing really as far as I can remember. With Dimitri and Edelgard. Those two chapters are there to give you a better understanding of their goals and motivations. Claude you don’t really have that. Much of what happens in part one has very little significance to Claude’s character
  12. I’d actually argue that Celica is the best written character in SoV. Because not only does she really help perpetuate the themes of kindness and compassion that mila stands for but she’s also punished for taking those things too far. She actively grows from experiencing the flaws of her ideals and it works for the most part.
  13. Wanna know what I just realized? Not once did I have the protagonist narrate his life’s story and outright say he was an otaku. I have failed you trashy isekai genre! also, one thing to note about my entry. The subversion of expectation is more so in how he dies rather than the ending itself.
  14. Oh I definitely agree with that. I just dislike comparison in the way of saying one character is better than another because that character handles their issues and struggles in a way I find more agreeable. it's like comparing apples and oranges in that case.
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