Benice

Banned because 🦩

Banned because 🐏

Banned because he's still around, actually! He never really had as much commercial success as with Garfunkel, but he's got a few famous ones.

Banned because technically it's just Simon for this one.

Banned because

Banned because surely you've heard Bridge Over Troubled Water, right?

Banned for not listening to Paul Simon.

Banned because I have Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard stuck in my head.

Banned from being from the Fried Chicken land.

Benice becomes Teehee enemy #1 in one fell statement, colorized: Is it bad that I thought that this was a sex joke also ouch Right, but characterization doesn't have to be independent of plot; if the story is going where I think it's going, basically none of the first half had much of anything to do with anything going on in the last bit aside from introducing the characters. Lots of stories I love are kind of slow burn or primarily character driven, but... I dunno man, even if the last three chapters of XB2 are the greatest thing ever, I still don't know if I'd consider the story to be that good simply because it looks like it's going to be pretty separate from the first six. Plus, so far... I'm not entirely fussed with the cast. I think Zeke and Pandoria are funny and I don't particularly dislike anyone, but maybe even because of the lack of plot relevance, I feel like they haven't really ✨sparkled✨, y'know? Comparing it to the only other JRPG I've played, LAD, the main cast isn't together until, like, more than two thirds into the game, but there's so much stuff happening and still lots of moments for the cast to shine. Also Nim exists and I kind of hate that she does. Also, if you want another game that spends a lot of time making you get attached to characters, please please Yakuza: Like A Dragon it's really good I mean, I like it, I just wished I understood it. ...I also probably borked the difficulty settings, I'll have to remember to check that when I get back to XB2. Esteban moment. I told you it was good! I will say, although there is a lot going on, the combat UI mostly makes sense! Well, I think it does, at least. Okay, true. When Roaming the Burning Wastes starts playing:

Stop right there, criminal scum! Nobody breaks the law on my watch. I'm confiscating your teehee goods. Now pay your fine or it's off to ban!

I think I might be able to sort OP out in about 22 hours, so you've until then, I suppose!

That moment when I spend years saying "Yakuza good" only to convince someone to play XB2 instead. Apparently it's one of those "it gets good later" kinds of stories. I'm on chapter 6 of 9 (I think) (nice), but, like... Well, the story's been pretty inconsequential so far. It's not offensively bad or anything like that unless I'm mistaken, but it's certainly not memorable, really. Let's just hope I have better aim than Esteban with my recommendations... Sure! To go over things one by one: (Oh lordy this was way longer than I meant for it to be) Gameplay (but I meant combat oops) Combat is really, really confusing. I know that the tutorials are bad in this game, apparently, but... I dunno, I just don't get it. It's flashy and it feels nice when you perform a combo, but I also have no idea what's actually going on, and therefore don't know what I'm doing for strategy or planning or anything like that- I just fight whoever I have to fight, and sometimes I win. I'm sure there's something there, be it in the strategy or the execution- There's no way there isn't something there- But I didn't get it. It's not altogether bad, it just didn't click in my brain. Additionally, when you explore levels (particularly the first real one), enemy levels are all over the place. For example, there are these froggy lads in a swamp in the first main level who are about level 40 IIRC. Which means they all one-shot you if they decide to attack you. This would be fine, except that enemies have colossal range and tremendous aggro. This makes exploring some areas much less enjoyable, since you die constantly while trying to find your way forward. Dying isn't a huge problem, since there's no game over screen (though I'd argue most bosses probably could have stood to cause one because it's kinda anticlimatic when you die to one then respawn next to them again), but christ on a bike, I hope Rex doesn't live in America, because Bill Gates couldn't pay off his medical bills. UI One of the coolest things about Xenoblade 2 is the worlds. They are so beautiful, with so many things to look at or explore. I grew up spending a lot of time in nature, and Xenoblade's worlds really feels like perfect worlds to explore in. Part of the genius of the world is how well it uses verticality to grant new locations or new viewpoints, meaning that on any given part of a mountain, there are dozens of places to find things. As such, you'd expect the map to show verticality or have "floors", so to speak, so that you can effectively see where things are. ...It doesn't show that at all, though. In the worlds themselves, this usually isn't too bad, but in cities... Wow. The cities are really cool and densely packed with NPCs, quests, and tons of little alcoves and things to see hand-crafted into every nook and cranny. Furthermore, they are often quite vertical with lots of levels to explore. The cities themselves rock everywhere from visual design to music, but finding things from the map or compass is a complete pipe dream- Both are completely useless. The worlds have so much detail put into them, and the map and compass simply cannot cope with it and are far too often altogether not worth following for how little information they give. This is incredibly sad, considering how good the exploration itself is. Side Quests Idk, they're just not that special. You can improve the economy of the cities you visit by doing enough quests, which is a great idea and apparently has tangible effects on the cities, but the quests themselves are pretty mid. I certainly haven't seen anything that compares to any Yakuza substory, even. ...And, of course, they can be a complete pain to complete due to both the aforementioned map/compass waypoints sometimes being unhelpful, and because of... Exploration/Affinity chart/Field skills stuff I've been saying the whole time that the exploration is incredible, and don't get me wrong, it really is. However, I do have one gripe with it, which is the affinity chart system. The Blades you get from core crystals, whether unique or common, have different "field skills", such as, say, fishing or foraging, which are things you can do at certain spots in the world. Higher skills in things like fishing or foraging gives you better stuff (I think), while other skills, like jumping or Water Mastery, give you access to new areas altogether. You can have up to nine Blades equipped at any given time, and their field skills stack, so a 4-skill foraging Blade and 1-skill foraging Blade give you 5 total skill. There are a couple different types of field skills: Elemental mastery (I can't remember what they do oops), Collection skills, which gets you stuff, whether it's ingredients or quest items, and Interaction skills, which is stuff like strength, lockpicking, ancient knowledge, etc.. You can level up the affinity charts of Blades by accomplshing milestones with them. Sometimes they'll be "Use X skill in combat 20 times", which is fine... But some charts take a crazy long time to complete, and some are locked behind quests which require you to have other skills, and so on and so forth. At present, I am 60 hours or so into my playthrough, and I have not completed a single affinity chart yet. Plus, since each blade has only some of the skills, you can be simply waiting to roll a blade that has the skills you need, and you'd best also be hoping you get one with an affinity chart that's easy to complete. This is, to me, easily the worst part of the game, since it flat-out can gate you from doing all kinds of things, from quests to exploration, and even extends to sometimes blocking you from getting useful skills on your Blades with no immediately foreseeable way of remedying the situation. Misc stuff The levels in Xenoblade are all essentially islands on the cloud sea. This is cool. What is not cool is that it is very easy to fall into the cloud sea, which for some reason does not void you out and instead leaves you to wander around trying to find a way back onto the island. This is annoying. Also some of the Blade designs are a bit terrible. Contrary to everything I just said, though, I do think that XB2 is a good game in many ways. I read this article earlier about a woman who... Well, y'know, during a performance of Tchaikovsky's 5th Symphony. Her reaction to the symphony is approximately my reaction to the game's soundtrack. I don't hear the fight themes that much because the characters talk so loudly and the fights are so busy, but the area themes are better than most battle themes I've heard. They sound incredible and all have areally distinct feeling that fits exactly with what you're seeing. It's absolutely masterful, no other word for it. As I mentioned earlier, the cities all have great music and are really interesting in and of themselves, and even though the story so far is literally "Rex goes on a silly road trip, but there's also terrorists and Hinoka from FE Fates", it's a fine enough excuse to wander through the stunning, unique, and atmospheric vistas the game has to offer. It's a great experience, even if the "game" part of it can be a tad lacking at times. I don't know if there are any, but I would recommend it! The last few chapters of 0 are absolutely incredible, and there are some great tunes.

Banned because Teehee!

Banned because relevant Discworld fanart here <-

I'd argue it's not the focus because the story is bad Actually, I do think you might like it. It certainly has its silly anime moments you wouldn't particularly like, but there's so much about the game that is good that you'd probably be able to look past it. I personally wasn't huge on much in the game- The overall gameplay, the UI, the sidequests, etc. all weren't things I enjoyed, but I still think it's a really good experience on the basis of visuals, world design, and music alone, certainly worthy of the time and money I put into it. I think I'd enjoy XB2 about as much as I did if it were a walking simulator, which a testament to how good the music and visual design is. (And also kinda how meh I thought everything else was, butthat'snotimportanti'mtryingtoconvinceyoutoplayit) Also, don't forget that you can still finish Yakuza 0!

Banned because I haven't been active enough 'round here lately...

BRO I BOUGHT A DOZEN EGGS FOR MYSELF AND EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE AND TWO OF MY ROOMATES ATE SIX EGGS THEN LEFT THE KITCHEN A DISASTER GGGHHHHSISGSGSISJSBSG

As a PSA, Y'all all probably have until May 2 to get something in because exams and such. Don't give in just yet!

Isn't high-key

Banned because you don't seem too upset about it...

Fortunately for me, I am still not an adult and don't have to deal with that stuff!

I think I've heard that Canadians get kinda porked by our ISPs in terms of cost and service, but I'm not certain of that.

...Wait, that's not normal?

I'm paranoid about using too much of our wifi, okay? Plus if my parents find out how much time I spend on the internet and what I do on it I'd never be seen again