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  1. Play me! Once, it was ruled by a vast empire called Lazberia. The god-kings of Lazberia built their empire on the blood of the enslaved citizens. For centuries, it stood untouchable. Yet still, time brought it to ruin. But the people lived on. From the ashes of Lazberia, they built two great nations. One, the Empire of Raze. The other, the Kingdom of Veria. Endless blood was shed in the name of holy war. Chaos, slaughter, destruction and hate consumed the hearts of the people. And now, a young man comes of age in these chaotic times. My initial plan was to wait for Aethin to drop the next patch, and/or April Fools. You know, so I could prank everyone by starting a thing for real the day people don't start things for real. But then the crownvirus happened. Did you know that "corona" in Spanish means "crown"? Those of you who have read my other stuff know how much it peeves me when people use spanish words as names. It's like ours is some kind of alien language! Anyway, I was doing an internship, and I was pretty happy with my workplace, for once. Learning more than in the past two years put together, my boss was surprisingly awesome, I actually looked forward to going there every morning. But now I'm stuck at home with nothing to do. Also, my oldest cat died a couple days ago. So I decided, "what the hell". Let's do this now. Thus, the time has come for us to ask ourselves one question. Are we ready? Are we ready for a journey... ...filled with death, tragedy and despair... ...but also happiness, hope and glee? Are we ready... ...for this intro to end already? Nah, just kidding. I love this intro. I recommend that you go and find a video of the full opening, because it's seriously gorgeous. But I'm running out of things to say. This was supposed to be shorter, but the gifs were too big, so I had to split them into multiple parts. Still, you won't deny that it was worth the effort. These visuals, man! Why did you have to go 3D, FE? You're so ugly now! Well, no matter. The important thing is that it's time. Time for... Title screen! Hello, everybody! Remember me? It is I, Saint Rubenio, the guy who can't play FE, hates just about everything and is moderately entertaining on occasion! I have returned with an even more obscure game, because that seems to be my thing. I couldn't play the popular ones and get all the views, nooooo gotta play this one that's only been played by 776 people. Anyway, yeah, I'm back! I already said everything I needed to say between the awesome gifs, so without further ado... Wait, hold up, hold up! What is a Berwick Saga? I didn't know Ricky Berwick got his own game! Don't be silly. TearRing Saga Series: Berwick Saga: Lazberia Chronicle: Chapter 174 (rolls right off the tongue) is a game made for the PS2 in 2005 by Shouzou Kaga, the legendary creator of the forum's titular series (which, I imagine, requires no introduction). This game only came out in Japan, but it has been fully translated by the amazing @Aethin and his programmer partner, Lightgazer. It is also Kaga's greatest work, and the best strategy game I have ever played. This isn't like my past LPs, where I played games that I loved and hated in equal measure. This is a game that I have a profound love for. Berwick Saga stars Reese, heir to the March of Sinon, and his advisor and general, the veteran Ward. They travel to the city of Navaron to respond to the call to arms of the King of Veria, the country that leads the Berwick League, which is waging a losing war against the Empire of Raze. There, his life shall change forever... It's a game that sort of looks like FE on the surface, but then you start playing and you realize that it's way different. And better. Those of you who have played it, I welcome you to witness as I fail miserably to get through it without casualties. The rest of you, take my metaphorical hand and allow me to show you around this masterpiece. And, well, also watch as I fail miserably. It's one of the selling points of my LPs, after all. Ruben, the rules. Yes, yes, of course. In my first LP, I broke every single one of my self-imposed rules. In my second LP, I forgot to make any, and had to improvise. In my third LP, I covered my back by making a bunch of exceptions, but I couldn't take advantage of them because of a few unfortunate losses I hadn't foreseen, and then I broke the Ironman. With any luck, we'll actually do something right this time. Though I'm not too hopeful. - This is an Ironman run. That means anybody who dies remains dead. Prepare yourselves to watch your favourites die at the hands of my incompetence. - On the matter of game-overs, this game has saves every five turns, so if I get game-overed, I will only go back to the latest save I have. Any units that died before the reset will be used for the remainder of the chapter, but they will be benched forever afterwards, as if they were too injured to fight any longer. - At the moment, I can think of two exceptions to these two rules: two critical captures that I might have to rig. Capturing is RNG-based in this game, so if I want to showcase as much as possible, I might have to save-scum those two captures. I reserve the right to make up more exceptions as we go. Don't worry, though, this won't be an "Ironman on the second attempt" or anything like that. I will not use this to undo my own failures. - As always, I will not be warpskipping. Mainly because warp is not a thing in this game. Ruben, are you going to be doing your lame sidestories here? Yeah, probably. See, in my past LPs I sort of winged fanfics to go with the main story. Mostly for fun, as a nod to the veterans, and to flex my mediocre skills as a spriter. If you find it to be too cringy for your tastes, though, you can just ignore those segments. I will not change the main story in any way, save for a quick joke. Speaking of the story, how will you show it? Same way as in the last LP: by painstakingly transcribing everything, with portraits to go with the text. Since I poured my heart and soul into this self-portrait, I will be using it to speak my mind during dialogue. Also, italic text, because now that I am in the artstyle of the game, I don't stick out as much. I want you to use X unit! Go ahead and tell me to do it! I won't make any promises, but Berwick Saga is much more flexible in terms of what kind of a team you can have than FE. You don't necessarily have to stick to a single team, so most units will see at least some use. So do throw some suggestions my way, and I'll see what I can do. Don't even mention Volo, though. Why? Because I despise OP edgelords. I let Navarre die in FE12, I sacrificed Rutger in FE6, I made Vega into a mere shopkeep in TRS, and you can be sure that I'll screw over Volo as well if I must. What if I really really feel like spoiling something? I know just about everything this game has to offer, but not everyone does. If you want to talk about something spoilery, do it, but put your spoilers in a spoiler box, and place a big warning on top. Just so those who have never seen this game before know not to click. What will be the schedule of the LP? Same as usual: when I'm done with the update and when I'm not busy facing technical problems. Normally I try not to take longer than a week, but we'll see how it goes. DISCLAIMERS This LP will contain: - Profanity. I swear like a sailor on a bad day. - Blood and gore. The game doesn't have any, but one of my gimmicks is that, when people die, I edit their portraits to be all bloody and awful. Watch out if you can't stand those things. - Dark humor. Also bad humor, at times. - Injokes that new readers may not understand. I cannot imagine what a nightmare it must be to start reading my stuff and encounter the same five recurring jokes that I've been using for the past two and a half years. See what I meant with "bad humor"? - Intense hatred for the most popular titles in the FE series. I am elitist scum who despises everything that's made FE into a mainstream franchise. This will be first and foremost a Berwick Saga LP, but be warned, I will often stop to say "man, this game is SO much better than Three Houses!". Other titles that I dislike include, but are not limited to, FE9 and FE7. If that sort of thing infuriates you, exercise caution. - Unhealthy amounts of character deaths. Growing fond of playable characters is unadvised. Is that everything? I think that's everything. All right, then! Fasten your seatbelts, ready your prayer books, and let's dive right into the world of Berwick Saga! ...not right now, though. As always, the first update will take a few days to come out. But at least you know it's coming, so it's all good, right?
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