Fire Emblem: Awakening, A Novelization *NEW* CHAPTER 6

[Ice_Viking_117]

This is the official forum topic for my Fire Emblem Awakening novelization. (I do know that others have done this, but I'm always up for some competition.)

I will be rewriting Fire Emblem Awakening's story into a novel that will be less fan fiction like and more book like. For example, the majority of the Shepherds will not be full fledged characters but perhaps mentioned.

Some spoilers for the story (only if you have not played the game): Robin will be the main character and protagonist with Chrom being a major character rather then compete with Robin for the title of main character. Robin (M) and Lucina will be the pairing for this story because, 1) it seems to be the most popular and 2) it fits within the story quite nicely when looking at it from a writer's perspective and how the major characters interact. There may be a few original characters of my own but I do not plan on writing many. The book is inspired by many of BLAZINGKNIGHT's ideas from his YouTube video, "How To Improve Fire Emblem Awakening's Story," like the conversion of the original story from a three arc structure to a one arc structure.

I contacted BLAZINGKNIGHT for some assistance and advice so please go check out his YouTube channel.

I am very much requesting literary critique from everyone so I can write the best possible story!

The first draft of the third chapter will be available to read in time...

Warning: The first draft will suck, like A LOT. I am writing a first draft without edits then going back and editing through. So far, some major edits that are required are more details, setting up of plot points and general writing competence.

Below is where the content can be found on Word:

 Chapter Layout.docx (this is a rough outline)

Prologue.docx

Chapter One.docx

Chapter Two.docx

Chapter Three.docx

Chapter Four.docx

Chapter Five.docx

Chapter Six.docx

Let me know if there should be any improvements to it (story or otherwise) or how I post the documents. (I'm still new to the interface, apologies.)

Edited January 10 by Ice_Viking_117

[Shrow]

Fire Emblem story re-writes are always fun. I remember watching BLAZINGKNIGHT for them.

Something to keep in mind that isn't mentioned is that BLAZINGKNIGHT only gives an overview of how a story unfolds but not much descriptions on the events and the dialogue.
Make sure to focus on good character chemistry, witty dialogue and general fun moments as that's what makes written works enjoyable.
Question: Are you going to be keeping it PG kinda kid friendly which is what Fire Emblem is? Almost like a mature kids Saturday morning cartoon vibe.
I know many would be tempted to introduce swearing and blood, but personally I don't think that fits Fire Emblem at all.

[Ice_Viking_117]

I definitely will be paying close attention to narrative and dialogue!

To me, Fire Emblem always seemed more PG13 (at least awakening did). I will be keeping the swearing to the same amount that happens in the game but I do want to make the combat somewhat realistic and more akin to a war story. Many of the half baked themes in FE Awakening that I will be exploring have to do with war and matching the combat to these themes seems appropriate. (This does not mean overly grotesque violence but rather violence similar to the of a war movie. Not glorified but realistic for medieval combat.)

Hopefully this answers your questions!

[Ottservia]

22 minutes ago, Ice_Viking_117 said:

I definitely will be paying close attention to narrative and dialogue!

To me, Fire Emblem always seemed more PG13 (at least awakening did). I will be keeping the swearing to the same amount that happens in the game but I do want to make the combat somewhat realistic and more akin to a war story. Many of the half baked themes in FE Awakening that I will be exploring have to do with war and matching the combat to these themes seems appropriate. (This does not mean overly grotesque violence but rather violence similar to the of a war movie. Not glorified but realistic for medieval combat.)

Hopefully this answers your questions!

The themes in awakening aren’t half baked. I think they’re pretty well realized. Personally I hated blazing knight’s video on the matter but that’s just my opinion. I’ve actually done a full analysis on awakening’s story myself if you’d like to read it.
 

 

[Ice_Viking_117]

42 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

The themes in awakening aren’t half baked. I think they’re pretty well realized. Personally I hated blazing knight’s video on the matter but that’s just my opinion. I’ve actually done a full analysis on awakening’s story myself if you’d like to read it.
 

 

That's a great analysis! I think there is truth in that. A better way to say it is "themes that weren't realized to their full potential."

[Azure loves his Half Elves]

I will certainly follow this.

I was wondering about doing something like this with FE: Three Houses’s Blue Lions route, tbh. I was thinking of having the story take place from the perspectives of Byleth and Dimitri (with their perspectives switching from one to the other).

However, I’ve a lot on my plate, so that will be for another day.

[Ottservia]

1 hour ago, Ice_Viking_117 said:

That's a great analysis! I think there is truth in that. A better way to say it is "themes that weren't realized to their full potential."

Thanks and I can agree with that. It honestly boils down to presentation. There’s only so much IS can do with awakening’s engine so maybe a Novelization might fix that

[Ice_Viking_117]

4 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

Thanks and I can agree with that. It honestly boils down to presentation. There’s only so much IS can do with awakening’s engine so maybe a Novelization might fix that

My thought exactly. A novelization could focus on the story and thematic aspect of it since I don't have to worry about gameplay, level design, rpg mechanics etc.

[Ice_Viking_117]

35 minutes ago, Azure loves his Half Elves said:

I will certainly follow this.

I was wondering about doing something like this with FE: Three Houses’s Blue Lions route, tbh. I was thinking of having the story take place from the perspectives of Byleth and Dimitri (with their perspectives switching from one to the other).

However, I’ve a lot on my plate, so that will be for another day.

Thanks!

If you ever do start something like this with Three Houses, I'll definitely be behind it! Let me know if you start working on it.

[Ice_Viking_117]

A new section is available to read! The Prologue!

Let me know what you guys think and if it should be shortened, lengthened (keep in mind that it is not meant to be chapter length), needs to be written more clearer etc.

Thanks for taking your time to read!

[Ice_Viking_117]

The Prologue is now up on Wattpad to read! The title of the book is "Fire Emblem, Awakening".

The first draft of chapter one is almost complete!

 

Thanks!

[Sir Gerwald of Vallora]

I found it. I was wondering if you wete going to put this up. I'll ptobaly give it a read to see how you handle this.

[Ice_Viking_117]

18 hours ago, Sir Gerwald of Vallora said:

I found it. I was wondering if you wete going to put this up. I'll ptobaly give it a read to see how you handle this.

Thanks man! Be as honest as possible with it, I will edit it the crap out of it once I've finished the story.

[Sir Gerwald of Vallora]

2 hours ago, Ice_Viking_117 said:

Thanks man! Be as honest as possible with it, I will edit it the crap out of it once I've finished the story.

As any good story really should be. And if you have anythi g you want to brainstorm, send me a DM. I've helped a few people here in the Forest come up with new ideas. 

Spoiler

Awakening is one of my favorite FE games to, so that certainly helps things.

 

[Ice_Viking_117]

After a big break for the holidays, I will hopefully be able to keep up with writing. Here is chapter 5!

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

E

Edited February 13 by Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Ottservia]

1 hour ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

It seems I share your sentiment as well as his (though I'm late to finding it, and I essentially fall in the middle of half-baked vs. not) , however that's why I'll check both you and blazingknights content...if I can sit through his video, that is. 

I would definitely like to hear your thoughts though there are a number of things in my original analysis that I don’t necessarily agree with anymore particularly the stuff about Emmeryn and Gangrel. I’ve actually been thinking about rewriting it soon.

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

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Edited February 13 by Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Ottservia]

7 minutes ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

I think it’s good though, that your thoughts have changed. Be it in favor of new or old ideas or not, at least your productive and growing within the topic. We FE fans are more then just stubborn in that regard lol.

 

I’m personally always of the opinion that you should always try to look at things from different perspectives. Especially in regards to stories. You never know if you’re initial impression or interpretation of a given work could be wrong. Sometimes looking at it from a different angle will yield more informed conclusions on it. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve had an initial interpretation of a story proven wrong by just playing through/watching/reading it again with a better understanding of the material abd focusing more on the specifics. Why just recently my view on Makoto Nijima’s confidant took a complete 180 on my most recent play through of P5R.

 

12 minutes ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

I’ve read through it quite a bit already, and I do agree with some of it (including the completely unrelated appreciation you have for Akechi, at least in aesthetics, which isn’t niche or anything but is nice to see someone with hot take as an avi on a site filled with debate lol. Can you tell I’ve been in less than civil discussions, be it plot analysis/interpretation or not within several fandom circles?)...

Akechi is by far my favorite persona character period. I didn’t care for him much in base P5 but oh boy did Royal really change that. He’s just such an amazing character. Also the fact that he’s so unabashedly edgy helps a lot. I love my edgy anime boys.

[Maof06]

2 hours ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

As for sex, sexual violence, etc. It's everywhere in FE, and when it is, it's not very PG. Sylvia has her little lines of being perverse, and so do a lot of characters, along with lines in Fates being really racy (The treehouse "I'll do something good for you tonight" and "I'll be gentle lines" go over a PG audience's head, but so does a lot of "mature" themes, and its not welcome.) Then we get to the really racy territory of Claude/Sylvia's and Deidre/Sigurd's relationships being explored a little closely in the novels, as well as Finn/Lachesis having their breif scene in the mangas. Then things take a turn for the worse when it is clearly explained and even flaunted by some characters that the women were raped in the siege of Yngvi, being done so justifiably in the words of some characters, as well as Lene, for instance, a minor in todays standards being raped and beaten. 

Correct me if I'm wrong, since we only have access to fan-translations of FE4, but aren't the women of Isaach suffering this during Dannan's regime? Larcei/Creidne mentions this during the start of chapter 6, and it's a big deal for Creidne's character. Here's the line in the most recent patch:

Spoiler

Larcei: I'm... I'm not gonna run away anymore! I'm sick to death of sitting here while those monsters butcher our friends! Or worse... The empire's thugs are still out there, snagging any girl they see... If Prince Shannan hadn't come for me that day, I'd be just another one of 'em: dead, or wishing I was... I won't forgive or forget their plan!

 

49 minutes ago, Ottservia said:

I’ve actually been thinking about rewriting it soon.

Do you have any estimate? I was also planning to expand my thoughts on the whole Robin x Lucina post I made on Alastor's thread, which fits nicely with the message that the game wants to convey to us.

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

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Edited February 13 by Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Maof06]

6 hours ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

is Creidne the name used in CYL? I’m interested in the etymology

Yes. Here's the etymology.

6 hours ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

In regards to that, I’m actually thinking of constructing a post where I expand on my interpretations of FE4 cast and how I present/wish to present them and receive the thoughts of those here. I’ve already constructed quite a bit of the contents of the post. In all actuality, so just don’t know where to post it.

FE4 is great for that overall because it has so many layers. I think the SNES tab is the ideal place to post it.

[Ice_Viking_117]

8 hours ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

@Ice_Viking_117 Though I'm really late, I'd like to agree with that old tip.

Witty dialogue for witty characters is always a plus to ease tension, especially when you want to make a really impactful scene. I think a lot of fanfiction and fanfiction-esque (I'd say you and I fall into this category) writers tend to make the mistake when we first write (especially as young kids/teens) is the overall tone becomes very edgy if not at a constant tense state. When this happens, it becomes increasingly difficult for us and our writing abilities to construct impactful and tense scenes. The tone is present throughout, and even if you actively search for those big moments, the audience becomes tone-deaf to these. Fun scenes where characters can be human and have these highs in life refreshes the tone and makes everything hit even harder. I'll check this out ASAP, since I'm a fan of novelization/manga format of FE, be it the official books or fan works!

Thanks for the tip! It makes a lot of sense. There is a lack of those moments in the first few chapters but I will definitely begin putting more of those moments in. Let me know if there's a specific scene where you think a tension relieving moment would work or if the work feels 'edgy' or too dark. 

Thanks for the responses!

I'm looking for as much critique and advice as possible.

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

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Edited February 13 by Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Ice_Viking_117]

2 hours ago, Deirdre an Bhróin said:

 

I haven't gotten to reading it, but if the beginning chapters follow the trend of opening with the endgame, I think it would be appropriate to leave out some lighthearted elements. Though the chapters after I recall establishes the Shepherds which is the perfect time to ease that tension that is present in the prologue. Also a great way to introduce character dynamics, which contains a lot of fun interactions in the games. This part of the game I establishes Ylisse as well, which can begin to build the world a bit, which I think the game struggles with. 

Once you read it, you'll see that I've cut out a lot of story introduction clichés like, waking up, starting with a dream, starting at the end of the story, amnesiac protagonist, etc, but without changing the story too much (as in Robin still does not know that he is Grima; I change much of the story in other places though). World building is something that I think I have struggled with so far in the novelization so I'll be paying more attention to it in these next chapters (I'll be going back and editing mistakes after I finish the first draft.).