Originally conceived in tribute to Mel Brooks's new miniseries History of the World, Part II, here I offer what no other writer's done: Fire Emblem meets 'Borscht Belt' humor (or my close approximation of it), with a bit of something completely different thrown in for good measure. Be warned, some jokes have been slightly tweaked--just in case. They said the worlds of Fire Emblem couldn't get any funnier. They're about to be proven wrong, for better or worse, thanks to two of the great