Original Alear Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 (edited) Death took it way too far this time. My beloved SeverIan, A dear soul has reached across the internet to summon me and tell me a tale. The tale of a college student who likes to hit on 13 year old girls over the internet, your tale. Plenty of people have informed you of how creepy you are, so I will reveal another aspect of this situation to you. You can't fuck internet people. Ever. No little girls are going to fall for your promises of Jonas Brothers concerts and wine coolers. Now, if you really want to get laid, I am more than willing to shove my cock right up that little ass of yours any time. No wine coolers, no concerts, no Disney channel hour, no GHB, and most importantly no longer will you face the endless sorrow of not getting freaky with all of the "kawaii lolis" you "meet" online. My inbox is always open, and I eagerly await your reply. Love, Death Edited February 24, 2010 by SeverIan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 Ignore him. He's just being an asshat, as usual. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Original Alear Posted February 24, 2010 Author Share Posted February 24, 2010 But I thought that 13 year old girls liked the jonas brothers. I'm never gonna get a gf now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dat Nick Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 what are you talking about only 10 year old girls like the jonas brothers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 (edited) ...Why are you even aiming for 13-year-olds anyways? Haven't you heard? Women are like wine: They mature over time. And the more mature, the better. In other words, go for a more mature age group. Like 18-20. Edited February 24, 2010 by Jan Valentine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 SeverIan, it's obvious you just copied/pasted that and later made it seem as if he was refering to you: My beloved Randomly Predictable, A dear soul has reached across the internet to summon me and tell me a tale. The tale of a college student who likes to hit on 13 year old girls over the internet, your tale. Plenty of people have informed you of how creepy you are, so I will reveal another aspect of this situation to you. You can't fuck internet people. Ever. No little girls are going to fall for your promises of Jonas Brothers concerts and wine coolers. Now, if you really want to get laid, I am more than willing to shove my cock right up that little ass of yours any time. No wine coolers, no concerts, no Disney channel hour, no GHB, and most importantly no longer will you face the endless sorrow of not getting freaky with all of the "kawaii lolis" you "meet" online. My inbox is always open, and I eagerly await your reply. Love, Death inb4: Forgive me for being a part pooper, but it's MY birthday and MY party! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emeraldfox Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 ...Why are you even aiming for 13-year-olds anyways? Haven't you heard? Women are like wine: They mature over time. And the more mature, the better. In other words, go for a more mature age group. Like 18-20. Mature... Ha ha ha ha ha ha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That wasn't directed at him, it was directed as RP for hitting on Soluna. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 Mature... Ha ha ha ha ha ha Yes, Mature. You have something against women who've developed their assets? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emeraldfox Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 Yes, Mature. You have something against women who've developed their assets? No. The way you used it made me laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 BATTLE NUNS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 No. The way you used it made me laugh. Well, considering Severlan and RP are going after the equivalent of Grape Juice in that analogy... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Original Alear Posted February 24, 2010 Author Share Posted February 24, 2010 SeverIan, it's obvious you just copied/pasted that and later made it seem as if he was refering to you: inb4: Forgive me for being a part pooper, but it's MY birthday and MY party! So wat. It doesn't matter whether I'm batshit crazy or not. I've still interpreted him as referring to me, so now my feelings are hurt. I have a right to be paranoid and take people's posts as referring to me despite no evident connection whatsoever. ...Why are you even aiming for 13-year-olds anyways? Haven't you heard? Women are like wine: They mature over time. And the more mature, the better.In other words, go for a more mature age group. Like 18-20. That implicitly places a high premium on virginity, which shows you to be a pedophile of a very particular kind. A bottle of wine is better the older it is until it is breached, at which point it soon turns to vinegar. Your metaphor reveals that you'd rather go for a 13 year old virgin than a 20 year old who lost her virginity at 18. That's pretty sick man. I don't objectify women by using flowery metaphors which inevitably do a disservice to them. Women >>>>>> flowers, the sun, alcohol, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That implicitly places a high premium on virginity, which shows you to be a pedophile of a very particular kind. A bottle of wine is better the older it is until it is breached, at which point it soon turns to vinegar. Your metaphor reveals that you'd rather go for a 13 year old virgin than a 20 year old who lost her virginity at 18. That's pretty sick man. I don't objectify women by using flowery metaphors which inevitably do a disservice to them. Women >>>>>> flowers, the sun, alcohol, etc. I like vinegar too, mon ami... Besides, you're over-thinking the metaphor. Whatever. Enjoy your grape juice, man, I'm gonna go get hammered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrashGordon94 Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 BATTLE NUNS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That reaction coming from the guy who got a hard-on from Bondage!Ranulf? Really? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrashGordon94 Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That reaction coming from the guy who got a hard-on from Bondage!Ranulf? Really? 1) I don't feel that way any more, so it doesn't count. 2) Just because I'm into weird things doesn't mean I can't find other thigns weird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CassieCinders Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 ...people take stuff too seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Original Alear Posted February 24, 2010 Author Share Posted February 24, 2010 I like vinegar too, mon ami... Besides, you're over-thinking the metaphor. Whatever. Enjoy your grape juice, man, I'm gonna go get hammered. Over-thinking a metaphor is the best thing to do with a metaphor IMO. It makes people realize how hilarious metaphors always are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meteor Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That is actually fucking hilarious. Lighten up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soviet Gregor Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 That is actually fucking hilarious. Lighten up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hero Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 (edited) Mature women are best. I like mine menopausal. Especially when they have almost as much chest hair as me! Edited February 24, 2010 by Hero Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Altera the Hun Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 Mature women are best. I like mine menopausal. Especially when they have almost as much chest hair as me! I think that may be past the best by date... Sure, it isn't expired, but that's something else altogether... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prompto Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 But I thought that 13 year old girls liked the jonas brothers. I'm never gonna get a gf now. That's a really fucking gross assumption there. Also, I think you're just being a bit butthurt about it. Can't take a joke? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK-201 Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 He is joking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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