IRL vs Online

[Celice]

All the world's a stage,

And all the men and women merely players;

They have their exits and their entrances,

And one man in his time plays many parts,

(now I've mad vibes for Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead. Again.)

[Inactive Account]

I think in general you'll find people more willing to speak their minds (and often be mean) online because there's less chance of retaliation for offense or disagreement. Anonymity (whether real or only pretended) adds an extra layer of that; you might not want your mom or your offline friend to know some opinion of yours, but you might not have any problem telling your online buddies about it when none of them know your name.

For me (and probably many others on the internet) there's another dimension to it as well-- offline, I have bad social awkardness and anxiety problems. Usually it's just on the level of moderate personal embarassment; on really bad days, if I try to socialize for too long with anyone except a few people who I really, really trust, I get panic attacks. I'm working on fixing those problems, because they're miserable and they suck, but they're not gone yet. If I take away the face-to-face element on a bad day, things get a lot easier, and I can still enjoy myself talking to people.

The other thing is that online (in anonymous environments, not Facebook etc), I'm "out" with my gender identity, while only one or two people who know me offline know that. I'm not sure how my family might react, and I don't feel like finding out until I've at least got a degree, a job, and somewhere to live.

The usual also applies in that I'm less hesitant with criticism and potentially controversial opinion online, but I do try to avoid making an ass of myself any more than I would offline.

Edited September 12, 2011 by Kiryn

[Ragnell]

I'm actually odd in that I think I am more apt to speak my mind offline than online. A very large portion of what I say IRL is totally sarcastic. Problem is, my dry sarcasm is very hard to communicate when I don't have the luxury of adding inflection and facial expressions. So I'm much more literal in my speech here, which makes me talk a lot less, because I can't really say what I want to say.

I'm actually fairly sociable offline, and as my friends will attest, I talk quite a bit. A bit of a contrast to my lurker status here.

Edited September 12, 2011 by Ragnell

[Original Alear]

The other thing is that online (in anonymous environments, not Facebook etc), I'm "out" with my gender identity, while only one or two people who know me offline know that. I'm not sure how my family might react, and I don't feel like finding out until I've at least got a degree, a job, and somewhere to live.

Is this an anonymous environment? I don't feel I've ever gotten a straight explanation of you regarding your gender identity, not that I'd be interested in it other than in the usual taking of notes. I know you are questioning.

I'm actually odd in that I think I am more apt to speak my mind offline than online. A very large portion of what I say IRL is totally sarcastic. Problem is, my dry sarcasm is very hard to communicate when I don't have the luxury of adding inflection and facial expressions. So I'm much more literal in my speech here, which makes me talk a lot less, because I can't really say what I want to say.

I'm actually fairly sociable offline, and as my friends will attest, I talk quite a bit. A bit of a contrast to my lurker status here.

Personally, I don'ts ee you as a lurker, you post here frequently enough. You just ain't a regular, by which I mean I don't know what kind of drink to serve you when you step up to the bar.

Edited September 12, 2011 by Blue Mars

[Inactive Account]

@Sev

I consider this board sufficiently anonymous in that I only know a couple of the members offline, but I'd prefer not to be a topic derailer. Ask on IRC or something.