Return of the Emblem Chapter Twelve: Divergent Paths

[Mercakete]

Norbert didn't respond to Ernesta primarily because he didn't hear her, but truth be told, he only would have argued anyway. Blake was in trouble and he fully intended on helping him out of it, part of Raquel's group or not. Already, he'd made it out of the dining hall and was speeding along what was probably the route he knew the best in the estate: the way between the dining hall and the stables. He got me out of that stupid cell in Ursaea and even if he can be absolutely frustrating at times, he's still not a bad guy. Treats people as fairly as he can... Blast it, Blake... Hold on! Just last long enough for me to get to you!

[ReformBlade]

Giving Shadrak a quick kiss on the cheek, Mushirah grinned for a moment, "Thanks for the effort tonight." she said, thinking that if things were as dire as they sounded out there she wanted to at least do something remotely memorable for herself. Not that a dead person would remember much when they're six feet under.

Jericho's eyes lit up at the mention of demons. He of course was well aware of their existence, but this far north was a different beast altogether. Bad luck really does seem to follow her around, doesn't it? he thought, making sure he was prepared. He had what he needed on his person, but what about Aneda? He had been with her but she had actually taken off running at the first mention of more crap going down and eventually they, that is, Aneda and Jericho could both be found at the entrance, prepared to roll out.

[Phoenix]

Ballroom

"Well, have fun trying to steal Mister Joshua's girlfriend. I'm off to find the colonel," Amber bid the group farewell, and embarrassed Miguel in the process.

"H-hey, she sought me out, okay? A-and obviously not for that," Miguel explained as Amber jogged away. He couldn't even be sure the girl was listening anymore, either, which just made the whole effort pointless.

"Obviously," Carmen emphasized, pricking Miguel in the heart a little. He figured it was mainly because she already had a date, but the way she said it, it sounded like overall disinterest.

Once she made it to the ballroom, Amber began looking for her commanding officer. Who she noticed first among the notable people in the room was the king, though. "Ahhh ... oh my goodness, it's really him! I didn't think King Shastak was here! I need to shake his hand or something! Quick, think ... think, how would the colonel handle-oh right, I'm supposed to be finding her and asking about our orders. Hmm, I suppose he's not going anywhere ... I'll find her and ask about our orders, and THEN I'll ask about how to approach the king without getting beaten into a bloody pulp. Alright then, now where could she be ..."

"Private Grace?" That was definitely the colonel's voice, Amber reasoned as she span around to confirm her suspicions. "You were talking to yourself. I was a little concerned."

"Sorry to worry you, Ma'am; I do that when I'm excited."

When are you not excited about 'something'? Cain thought at her.

"Ma'am, Captain Cecelia wants to know if we have any new orders."

"Not yet. No one's spoken a word to me since the king's announcement," Sapphire answered, sounding a little worried.

"Okay. Also, how would you go about approaching the king over there? I want to avoid getting stopped by his guards if that's possible."

"Well, put your sword over on that table, and carefully approach him from the front. Make sure you have his attention, so he knows you wish to speak with him. From there, it will be up to him if that happens. That's all you can do, really. I would report back to the captain first, however."

"Okay, okay. I just didn't know the king was actually here or I would have hunted him down earlier--oops!--sought an audience with earlier! Heehee."

Cain groaned at that blunder but no one seemed to be paying them any attention anyway.

Carriages

"I uh ... y-you're welcome," Shadrak nervously replied, a blush appearing on his face. Had he really done anything warranting a kiss? He wasn't sure, but at the same time, he was glad he hadn't ruined this opportunity for her. He planned to make whoever cut the evening short for them pay, though. For now, though, it seemed best to try not to get upset over what could have been, and stay relatively composed. "Don't worry; once this is over, we can try something else later. I'll give it my best effort during that too, heheh," he smiled nervously while making his pitch.

Dining Hall

"Huh?" Suzume looked toward the entrance to see none other than Gar. She was caught a little off guard, but quickly composed herself as she stood up from her seat. "Well, it doesn't matter if you got here first because now that I'm here, I'm going to take you down," she threatened as she held out her hand to begin charging up a thunder spell.

Ernesta didn't know the history between these two, so she was surprised to see this sudden change in Suzume's attitude.

That was when Suzume remembered that no matter what she tried, she wouldn't be able to get a spell charged while this close to a magic seal. "err- ... oh, that magic seal! Well, so much for that ...." She smiled pitifully and began walking toward Gar.

Why is she giving up so easily, I wonder? Ernesta mused, wondering if that was just some ruse.

"It's ... good to see you again," she said, hoping that would confirm beyond any doubt that she didn't actually have hostile intentions.

Hallway

Reign almost made it back to the dining hall without seeing anyone else, but Robin came into view, and Bert soon afterward. Lastly, Nika came into view. He let the former two pass without a word since they both seemed to be in a much bigger hurry. "... you know ..." he paused to stop walking for a moment. He stood closer to the wall so the runners wouldn't have to go around him. "With our luck, the enemy's just going to come straight to us," he said to Veronika. That's what happened to me, at least.

Other Main Entrance

Nadine sighed at Erion's answer.

"Thank you. Just wait here for a minute. I'll be right back," Raquel said before rushing off into the mansion. She went straight up the main staircase, trying not to trip as she went back to her room. She couldn't help but wonder where Chip had wound up after his bath, since that was the last place she saw him.

[Mercakete]

Anyone he was passing wasn't specifically identified as anyone other than someone to avoid running into and having made it to the main hall, quickly proceeded out the doors. After that, his haste brought him fairly quickly to the stables. After that, locating Rizen's stall opening it, and bringing her out with a quick supply check swiftly proceeded and concluded. Then, he mounted up and urged her forward, and so the two came speeding out of the stables. Okay, so, north gate...

Edited December 19, 2013 by Mercakete

[Snowy_One]

"I'm coming with you!" said Tia, trying her best to smile as she followed Veronika out of the manor. It wasn't that Tia couldn't navigate on her own, it was simply that following Nika was a bit easier, especially if something changed. Plus, if the demons suddenly attacked the manor for some reason, having a big, squishy, older person in front of her would be far more useful.

However, as she followed behind, one of the other people, Reign, stopped Nika. Quietly, Tia tried to step around the pair to continue to the gate and meet up with the group going to the city. Besides, even if they insisted that she couldn't fight, fires were doubtless going to break out and keeping them under control was important!

---

Robin watched as Bert headed off towards the stables. Robin didn't follow for obvious reasons. She had no mount and needed to get out-front. "When I get the chance, though, I'll ask Bert for a ride. Getting to the city faster means I can down more demons and keep more Urswine alive. she thought to herself.

[scorri]

Erion

"... Right. She's gone now." Turning to Nadine, Erion spoke quickly and quietly, "I'm leaving now. If you can stop her from following me, good. If not, keep her here until she has a good group of people to protect her. I don't want her following me, but I understand if you can't keep her from doing so. I'll do my best to find Blake and get him out before she arrives though." Not waiting for a reply, he sprinted off to the stables. Arriving there, he swung the bow and quiver he'd stored here onto his back, quickly saddled Pips up. Starting to head back the way he came, he paused. He didn't want to risk running into Raquel that way. Turning Pips down the less direct route to the main gates, he nudged her in the sides and the two of them raced down the path, headed for the city.

Hoshi

Having found her tome and her courage, Hoshi walked out into the courtyard just after Raquel rushed into the mansion. Nervously looking around, she found a quiet spot to wait for orders. It seemed that some people were getting ready to head back into the city but she figured that her place was here.

[Script]

A Man Called Gar

"Well, I suppose I should call that a shocking greeting," Gar grinned as he watched the theatrics. "And it's wonderful to see you. Would have been absolutely amazing a while ago, but hey. What's done is done. How've things been?"

[Ether]

It didn't take very long for Angelica to catch sight on the Prince's carriage... now there was the delicate way to do this, or the exciting way... and well let's face it who needs delicacy, right? With that decided, Angelica made her landing square on top of the moving carriage with a rather audible thunk.

"I'm back, Prince Athrun. There didn't seem to be any survivors at the first checkpoint... well, aside from the hellhounds. No living guardsman and the houses were broken into, so civilian casualties are... well the estimate isn't very good. Morgana said she would search for survivors, but the prospects aren't good." She called out, loud enough to ensure she was heard and her voice recognized. With that taken care of, she opened the door enough to stick her head in from the roof, unfortunately no seating currently available about or upon Athrun.

"There seemed to be hordes of the things... I know Professor Wyght implied she was hoping you could find reinforcements."

***

"Aye, Axe- Zero Eight, wait up.": Arietta called out, as the armoured man made his way to begin manning battle stations.

***

"Good, make sure you stay somewhere safe, as well." Annelise concluded, before turning towards Ernesta.

"Could I ask for one of your non-combatant attendants to watch over this hatchling for the time being?"

[Snike]

Evelyn nearly had her sword drawn when the voice of Angelica, of all people, came from the roof where the thud had occurred.

"Don't startle us like that," the royal guard said, as she sheathed her weapon. Rather than continuing on herself, she decided to let Eugene answer the question of reinforcements, however unlikely they were to be.

***

"Yes, what is it?" Axel asked, slowing down a bit. "If it's about Valcyn, feel free to set her straight if you want. I'm sure Weyland and her friends won't mind."

***

"I'll go next," Blake said, as he eyed the walkway. The jump should be easy enough, though the landing was what he was worried about. Oh well, it was either that, or be stuck on the roof for the rest of the night. The Ursian man took a deep breath, then jumped down, mimicking what Private Baker had done by rolling to absorb some of the shock. Once he had landed, he winced because of his ankles, but otherwise seemed to be fine.

"Your turn, Private Linnet," he said, to the last member of their little group.

[-Cynthia-]

Veronika

"We should probably make it clear to everyone that we're in there to get Blake and get out, not fight every demon in the city. What's with the eyepatch?" she asked Reign, finally noticing it. Did he go to the ball dressed as a pirate or something? I guess some women go for that sort of thing...

Nadya

The carriage ride was rather awkwardly quiet, especially considering Gytha and Haythem were usually rather chatty. She thought about saying something to lighten the mood and raise their spirits, but she found herself unable to come up with anything and chose to prolong the silence.

[Phoenix]

Dining Hall

"Things have definitely been strange in this country. I was proposed to twice on the way up here and another person 'tried' to mug me. Nothing beyond that that's worth mentioning since I left Sergio, though," Suzume explained. She glanced at Ernesta to make sure she wasn't about to drag her off to do something related to battle preparations, but she seemed to be preoccupied at the moment. "Was your journey here interesting?"

Ernesta frowned when Annelise approached her about the newborn. "I assume there's no one among your people who can look after it at the moment ... very well," she conceded, glancing in some other direction while holding out her arms to receive the child.

Hallway

"Found myself being chased by one of those demons before this situation finally got out of hand ... ... got caught. Still alive, though," Reign explained. He kept it simple, yet vague, since the details of the attack just didn't seem to matter at this point. Reign at least survived; a lot of others weren't so lucky.

Royal Carriage

"Hell hounds?" Athrun quietly repeated.

"There's one other carriage on the way ... we have eight people in total. I think that's all the reinforcements we'll be getting from outside the city," Eugene noted. "We'd best destroy any creatures we find at the gate, take control of the area, and recruit anyone nearby who might still be fighting."

"The civilians also need to be protected if there are any left in the area," Athrun added. "I hope Morgana manages to find someone; I regret how long this is taking."

Raquel's Room

Raquel finally tripped as she stepped into her room but caught herself on the bed. "Okay, if someone comes after me, I'm probably going to get killed if I'm wearing these things."

I'd advise you to practice with them more often, but I'm certain you'd just prefer to wear your boots, Hypnos commented.

"That's right. Why wear these to a fight?" she rhetorically asked him before taking them off and going back to shut the door. She said she would only be a minute, but she needed to change, now. "Close your eyes."

Always closed.

"You know what I meant, now do it."

Other Main Entrance

Clearly, lying to Raquel was becoming the new thing, which Nadine found slightly amusing. She didn't plan on letting Raquel go at all, since she would have to come with, but she might not have room to argue if enough people volunteered to escort her back to that war zone ... just like the last time. Reign was missing now too ....

The Walkway

"Okay ... here g-" Ken cut himself short when he caught something moving outside the outer wall. It looked like the cavalry was finally here. Too little too late though, if they wanted to help out, that is. The gate was already shut, and anyone in the area on the inside of the wall was surely dead by now. Deeper in the city, who knew, though. "One of you two get their attention! Let'em know they need to head around to another gate."

"No, we need them right here to guard the area, even if they can't get inside right now," Jessica reasoned, not wanting to completely abandon the area to the demons.

"With how many people died, you'd think keeping ourselves spread out like this was a bad idea. At least if we shore up our numbers, we'll have a better chance of driving these things out." With his piece said, Ken leaped down from the tower's roof and landing on his feet. He forgot to roll, though. "Hrg ... uuuurgh ... I'm alright! I'm fine. Ugh." He looked away a little annoyed when Jessica shook her head at him. "Now come on, let's get their attention and tell them what's going on before we get moving."

Edited December 19, 2013 by Phoenix

[-Cynthia-]

Veronika

"Have you seen a healer about it? You need to get that looked at soon or you could go blind," she advised Reign, walking towards the front gate as she spoke.

Ball Security

Shortly after King Nathon made his announcement, Captain Erica found Private Jacobs and her other subordinates and made her way to where Head Wrathite Langley was located. She gave him and Clover a very quick bow before speaking.

"Head Wrathite Langley! You have likely already heard that the city is under attack- please command us as you will," she said, leaving her helmet on as she felt she may have need of it soon. I hope Cecelia and Norbert are all right- but my duty comes first.

[Mercakete]

As soon as there wasn't anything overhead Norbert had Rizen pull up into the air and begin her climb. It only took about five minutes (bypassing the estate gates by flying over them) to reach the north gate, where Blake had last been seen. By the time he got there, though, there were a bunch of horsemen gathered in front of the closed gate and three other people were on top of the gate. Actually... Is that...? Norbert flew in closer and had Rizen hover next to the edge of the wall on the gate's right side.

"Hey," he greeted the three, before specifically addressing Blake, "I heard you were in trouble." From there, his face grew more perplexed. "I'm glad you seem like you're okay, but Veronika's rallying people to come save you. What's going on?"

[ReformBlade]

"That'd be fine." Mushirah replied dryly, feeling drained from the events. With an audible sigh, she slumped against her seat a bit, muttering aloud, "I didn't think I'd ever get this homesick this quickly." All she could think of doing was going home and curling up on her bed to make all the bad things go away. To be fair, that's something she actually pretty often thought of doing, no matter the situation given how recently she left her home. And given how weird and disturbing things kept getting, it almost felt like she'd do it any day now.

[Ether]

"You have my thanks." Annelise replied with a bow, after handing the vasilus hatchling to the head maid.

***

"You try landing on a moving carriage without startling someone... this thing is almost completely sealed, even if I could project my voice while platforming, it wouldn't get inside." Angelica replied with a pout, before addressing Athrun.

"I'm sure there's a more politically correct term for those things, but I don't know what it is, so for now, they're hell hounds. Big, lanky dogs that'll attack anything that moves, and look like they're straight out of those scary stories kids get told so they don't disobey their parents, you know?"

***

"S'not that... where d'ya want me stationed? Like hell I'm gonna let some bloody demons overrun this 'ere place!" Arietta replied, as she followed along Axel.

'When did he become Zero-Eight... how? Urgh, now's not the time to be worrying about that...'

[Snike]

"You could have waited until we arrived," Evelyn shot back, before commenting on the hellhounds. "No, hellhounds will be fine to describe them. It is a good thing we brought magic, I suppose. It will make getting rid of packs of those beasts much easier."

The healer - Ethan was his name- had been awfully quiet. The royal guard spared a glance to see that he appeared to be praying. Hopefully they wouldn't need that prayer, tonight.

***

"I agree with keeping them here. The southern gate was already locked down, so I imagine at least one of the other two gates is like that. Plus I imagine some of the security from the engagement ball is on its' way as well," Blake said, before turning towards the general direction of the cavalry."HEY! OVER HERE!"

The man would've shouted more , but before he could, a pegasus knight approached. It was Norbert, of all people! And judging by what he had said, he came from the estate.

"...I told her I'd catch up..., " Blake said, almost to himself. Then to Bert, he said, "I'm not going to even bother asking you why you're here, but what's going on is that this gate was almost overrun. I stayed behind to close it, and with the help of Privates Linnet and Baker here, we managed to do that. At too great of a cost, though. Anyways, could you please do me a favor and go tell Raquel yourself that I'm fine? She was worrying about you, you know. In the meantime, I'm going to help the army, if I can, in securing the area. Then I'll head back."

OOC: will respond with Axel once I talk to Phoenix.

Edited December 19, 2013 by Snike

[Mercakete]

Worrying about me? Norbert's face twisted from somewhat confused to downright perplexed. It wasn't really the time to be asking why she was worried, though. He figured he could ask her that after he'd assured her that Blake was fine. So, face returning to a serious normal and giving a nod, he answered, "Alright, I'll do that. But first, did you three want some help down? Probably better to be with those horsemen down there than just standing up here by yourselves."

[Script]

A Man Called Gar

"Well they have good taste even if they don't have good brains," Gar commented on the proposals. "But a mugging, man thing's are, well actually yeah, guess I can see it with that whole dragon fiasco going on. If it happened after at least, hmmm," Gar rubbed his chin for a bit. "Well we got into some fights with a bunch of arrogant prats at some fort place. I was totally going to completely obliterate them too but someone else just had to ruin my plan." Gar shrugged. "Frankly it wasn't that interesting, except getting that flute the, and getting some throwing knives just before I came out here."

[Phoenix]

Langley's Room

Desmond was still in his chair in the room he had reserved for the meeting with Raquel and seemed to be deep in thought when the officers arrived. Clover had returned and was sitting in the seat Blake had been using. She was in the middle of a prayer and didn't budge, even when Erica and Jacobs showed up so suddenly.

"... how many left with the prince in the end?" he asked the room in general. Clover had told him about what happened, but she didn't wait around to see who all would leave with him; getting word back to Desmond seemed far more important, so she didn't know for certain. It seemed like any orders he'd give were at least partially dependent on the answer to his question.

Main Entrance

"Captain," Amber said as she returned outside. "No new orders yet, but I saw the king himself in there just now. I was wondering if I could go back in really quick and say hello ..." She steadily became more and more nervous as she explained the situation with the king, fearing Cecelia might not let her go back inside to 'pester' the man.

Dining Hall

Gar's news was somehow both surprising and not. "You people can't stay out of trouble for very long, can you? It's only been a week and you've been in at least one other fight before this? Though, I guess you'd be fine with that. You seem to really like the danger," she commented, smiling weakly. That was the whole point of her botched greeting, really. She wanted to startle him a little since he seemed to like being kept on his toes. She was a little worried he wouldn't find her all that interesting anymore if she ceased to be some kind of lurking danger to him.

"Well I need to put this seal away and this ... child needs to be placed in someone else's care as well," Ernesta spoke up. "I'll be back for you shortly, Suzume, so don't go anywhere."

I have a feeling I'm going to miss dinner no matter how things go ... Suzume told herself.

Royal Carriage

"Hmm ... someone must be responsible for them; they couldn't just appear at random like this," Athrun mused aloud.

"We'll keep our eyes peeled for their handler," Eugene assured him. "It's likely someone who can walk among them without being attacked. Trust no one who can safely approach them."

"Angelica, you should-" Athrun cut himself off realizing the carriage was already full. "Sit with the driver. You shouldn't have to ride on the roof like that."

Regular Carriage

"Homesick, huh?" Shadrak asked, somewhat intrigued. He'd heard this before but hadn't put much thought into how he felt about things like that. Thinking back on it ... yeah, he definitely didn't miss what essentially passed for home, neither the village he grew up in, nor Chie's cottage, though the latter was certainly more welcoming. "Well, ignoring all of the insanity that surrounds this group, I'm glad to be away from home ... as a whole. I wouldn't learn as much about the world if I was stuck back there, after all. You're going to have to do a lot more traveling to if you want to be a cartographer," he noted with a small smile.

Hallway

"I was already blind in this eye when I came to," Reign clarified.

Raquel's Room

It only took Raquel a few minutes to change out of her ball gown. She swapped that for her pants, shirt, gloves, and boots before pausing. "Hmm ..."

Something wrong, Discovery?

"I'm not sure if this is enough and I should just head down there now or if I should put on a few more layers. It doesn't make much of a difference against most weapons but ..."

Just grab whatever you can put on along the way and be done with it. You're at least modest now. Just be certain that this is how you want to handle the situation.

"I'm not going to let Blake get killed over this."

The Walkway

"You don't see that everyday," Jessica commented as the pegasus rider approached. The two privates soon learned that Blake knew this man personally. Eventually the pegasus rider offered to help them each get down from the wall. Jessica spoke first, saying, "Appreciate the offer, but we've still got a job to do here. The cavalry can't get in from this gate, but the demons can't get out, either, which means it's up to us to start clearing these things out."

"That's suicide," Ken noted irritably.

"Not necessarily. I've got some ideas we can try. As long as they don't come at us all at once, I think we have a good chance of thinning them out."

"BLOW THE GATE OPEN," one of the cavalry captains ordered.

"Ah hell, they want to get inside really badly, don't they?" Ken muttered.

Edited December 20, 2013 by Phoenix

[Script]

A Man Called Gar

"Danger? Well, more along the line of anything that breaks complacency and boredom. It's why I'm here now, I got bored of waiting in some line." He nodded at his own pointless recourse. "Oh, if anything this trip is a breather from my more standard activities," Gar wryly replied. "Everything's so nice and quick, no needing to lay down months of planning to devastate faith in a system then pick them off one by one until the last handful are literally cowering in fear. Now it's just stab, stab, stab done. Plenty interesting, still, it deflates some of that... tension in waiting for that right, perfect moment to strike." Gar shrugged. "But hey, that's the contract. And it shockingly let me meet you so it's all good." Gar looked over at the person who'd called out Suzzy Q's name. "So, things moving good for you here?"

[Mercakete]

Cecelia quietly considered Amber's request. Part of her figured the king had much better, more important things to do and consider than the chatty private. In all honesty and especially given the circumstances, Amber really should be prepared to defend the guests, too. She had to admit, though this was a rare opportunity. She, herself, was tempted to meet the king -- maybe it would help her career.

After deliberating for a few moments, she decided, on her part, that going up to greet the king during this time would not show responsibility nor her competency as an officer. Looking out for the better interests of the guests, however, would, even if it went unnoticed. To Amber, she answered, "You may go greet the king" then, more quickly and pointedly to get her subordinate's attention, she accented, "but...be quick about it. If we're attacked while we're undermanned, it could cost us in blood."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The lack of coordination between those on the wall and those below left Norbert unsure of what to do. Now that the horsemen were going to blow the gate in that these three worked so hard to close, their plan seemed to be quickly breaking up. They either needed to get a message down to them quickly or they needed to get out of the way. "I'll offer one more time since the situation seems to be changing: are you sure you don't want me to help you down?"

Edited December 20, 2013 by Mercakete

[-Cynthia-]

Erica and Jacobs

"I regret to say that I was not watching the prince especially closely- there were maybe five others accompanying him as he left?" Erica said in an unsure tone.

"Not sure I'd count all of them as able bodied combatants either, that dance partner of his might not be much good in a fight for instance," Jacobs chimed in. Erica shot him a look, but this was neither the time nor place to have a talk about speaking out of turn.

Veronika

"Oh...I'm sorry," Veronika said to Reign, unsure how to respond appropriately in a situation like this. "Are you going to be all right?" she asked him as she stepped outside. Some of their group was already gathered, but Veronika figured she should at least wait for Raquel to return before leaving, although there was little time to spare.

Edited December 20, 2013 by -Cynthia-

[Ether]

"Where would the fun be in that, though? Besides, atleast now you have some time to prepare." Angelica replied, before placing herself next to the driver as Athrun had suggested.

***

Well that was all taken care of. Now Annelise need only wait for Steinn to arrive back.

[Snike]

"Stations can wait," Axel said, as he continued to walk. "Actually, Could you go over to the workshop and inform Anna? She'd probably speed things up drastically."

^***

"No, it's fine, at least on my end," Blake said, as the offer was made to get them down. "We can use the ruins of the gate, assuming they manage to blow it up soon, to get down and group up with the cavalry, then. Getting the gate closed was mostly to prevent the monsters from getting out and terrorizing the rest of Europa, since we were outnumbered at the time. Just hurry, since the last thing Raquel needs right now is to run into this."

[ReformBlade]

"Traveling..." She echoed dully. I've killed people... I could've traveled around the world without having to resort to this kind of barbarism! And yet, I'm not running away from it... Maybe I'm not the sweet little girl I always assumed I'd be? "I still do have a lot of it to do, yes. Barely even touched the surface... I need better goal management, looking at the big picture like this is killing me on the inside, like... I try, but I never seem to see any real progress and-" a deep breath and a readjusting of her posture, "and I just... don't know. I am so confused right now." She looked to Shadrak for a moment, concerned and a mite of frustration on her face, before shifting her gaze to the floor, trying to figure out a way to get rid of all this anxiety and stress that seemed to be trying to take over her.