Blaze The Great Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 Ahh I see. Enjoy yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted July 18, 2015 Author Share Posted July 18, 2015 Ahh I see. Enjoy yourself. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 13, 2015 Author Share Posted August 13, 2015 Well, I have returned from my long American exile to find this on the second page. For shame! We shall have to do something about that, starting now. Funny, I thought you'd turn up if I headed to the place where all the idiots were. Eh, I already know the answer with you. So, beginning the battle we have Pidgeot, who Wolf Pack KOs with 2 flame wheels. Nothing worth mentioning. Three guesses how this one turned out. Louis XIV never did like dogs very much. Or things that were orange for that matter, what with his rivalry with William III of Orange. Two bites made quick work of Alakazam. Venusaur, however, should prove more of a challenge. Its Sleep Powder is severely rehabilitating and might even allow Venusaur to beat Wolf Pack. Or Wolf Pack could wake up next turn and kill Venusaur with a critical Flame Wheel. That works too. Hello, line obviously written with the storage solace of the original Gameboy in mind that probably should have been updated for the GBA! Meet the people of Serenes Forest! My god, man, you can't just kill every other trainer in the world! Beyond this door is the final battle with Team Rocket. First, though, there IS someone I want to use this on. Perfect. Next time on Pokemon Firered, we wrap up Silph Co. Also, as a question to you all: do you want me to do the post game? Ive already beaten the main story, but there is another LP I'm rather excited to do after this one, so I kind of want to get this one done quick now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 14, 2015 Author Share Posted August 14, 2015 Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! First off, unless something happens I will not be doing the post game. Anyway, last time I beat Woodrow, again, and now the time has come to defeat Team Rocket once and for all! Unfortunately. President? Ah, you poor man. You are obviously poorly versed in monarchial hierarchy. You see, my good man, you can't get what you want by talking to the President... You must answer to the King. L'etat, c'est moi. Kangaskhan is made short work of by Wolf Pack. Well gee, I wonder who won this one. In hindsight, I totally should have had The State fight Nidoqueen as a reference to the War of the Spanish Succession, where the France of Louis XIV fought the Great Britain of Queen Anne I for domination of western Europe. Of course, Nidoqueen lost here, so it isn't necessarily completely true to what happened historically. Shocker, I know. You know, I don't think even the Nazis ever said something along the lines of that. Why? Because they knew it would make them sound stupid. Congratulations, Giovanni, you are officially dumber than Hitler. I'm not Imperial Japan, and you certainly aren't MacArthur, Giovanni. acArthur was even dumber. I don't care how many times you bring up Inchon, he single handedly brought Maoist China into the Korean War. Without that, We probably would have kept North Korea. The next time you see Kim Jong Un make a speech, blame it on MacArthur. Oh god, now the corporations will love me. No handouts for you! How about you buy me Kanto? That would be nice. That is NOT Kanto. Next time on Pokemon Firered, we come to terms with our non ownership of Kanto. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Today, we challenge the sixth gym leader, whose annoying gym puzzle would take way too many screenshots if I was to document it! We start this update off in Saffron Gym. I'll just cut ahead to Sabrina, for the sake of your time and my Photobucket storage! And here she is in all her glory, Sabrina herself! I wonder what she has to say? Guderian, get the straitjacket! Look, ma'm, I know it can be upsetting, but you legitimately need a psychiatrist. Psychic powers just are not real. Now, you are going to come with us and we are going to help you. Okay, so maybe that wasn't the best way to word that. Look, I want to help you. I'm your friend here. Just ask Guderian, the turtle I named after one of the top Wehrmacht commanders in the Second World War. THAT's good evidence to my trustworthiness, right? Oh god, what the hell is that? Guderian, put that thing out of its misery with bite. See, madame, if this is your idea of company you need serious mental assistance. A moth? Now, seriously. throwing an innocent moth out to fight is just asking for it to die. It never stood a chance against Wolf Pack's flame wheel. Oh Arceus! Get that thing away from me! Wolf Pack, get out of there! Blitzkrieg has just the thing for you. Perfect. Ma'm, I know it can be hard to accept mental illness, but I hope that with the help of the asylum you can move on from this tragic phase in your life. Next time, we head out to see, and get extremely lucky with a certain legendary bird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamanoir Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 (edited) You must answer to the King. L'etat, c'est moi. In the original, Giovanni had an amazingly silly line who get suppressed in FRLG : "Degage ou deguste" (You could translate this by "go away or suffer", but you'll lose the alliteration".) Edited August 18, 2015 by Tamanoir Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 19, 2015 Author Share Posted August 19, 2015 In the original, Giovanni had an amazingly silly line who get suppressed in FRLG : "Degage ou deguste" (You could translate this by "go away or suffer", but you'll lose the alliteration".) Do you mean in the French version? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamanoir Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 Do you mean in the French version? Yes, indeed. It also have Lance have the most awesome speech ever when you face it (both in the original and FRLG). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 29, 2015 Author Share Posted August 29, 2015 Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Apologies for the unannounced hiatus; getting back to school was crazy and the like. As a notice, starting Monday and ending Friday the LP will again be on hiatus, because I have a class trip to Berlin where 99% of my time will be spent doing stuff or eating Kebabs (if you ever find yourself in Europe, especially Turkey, you owe it to yourself to try the Doner Kebabs. They are amazing). With that out of the way, lets begin! We start out this update giving this old man those teeth we found in the Safari Zone! Well, thanks for THAT mental image. It doesn't matter though, as we get Surf, which is not only required t o complete the game, its a great move, unlike most HMs. So here we are heading south, towards Seafoam Islands and maybe something more... legendary? Also probably birdlike. No. No I can't. Ive been afraid to get my face wet since before I could walk. And do you know why? Because water has been known to cause drowning, which is bad. Thats why we as human beings evolved legs. No, but you can have something else, if you know what I mean. Well, here we are at the Seafoam Islands. I fear what Arnold Schwarzenegger would do if he was here. You know, this really makes no sense. Like, for it to be cold inside, it has to be cold outside, too. Well, as Chuggaaconroy would say: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jaJFUAHGQM Well, in order to proceed, it looks like the time has come for... strength puzzles! Remember, folks, these ones started the whole thing, so they are deserving of even more hatred. THERE! FINALLY! You have no idea how annoying that was! Well, I suppose you do, if you've ever played Firered. Or Leafgreen. Or Red and Blue. Or Yellow. Or, I suppose, Green, the version that was only released in Japan. I'll just stop there. What could be just a few pixels up? Is it, by any chance, legendary or birdlike? Find out tomorrow on Pokemon Firered! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted August 30, 2015 Author Share Posted August 30, 2015 Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Last time, we explored Seafoam, and discovered that, shockingly enough, Pokemon isn't always realistic! This time, we see what exactly lies a few pixels above the screen we ended on. OH MY GOD ITS SOMETHING LEGENDARY AND BIRDLIKE! WHOEVER COULD HAVE GUESSED? I start by weakening it, of course. Flame Wheel does just enough to get Articuno into the red. Well, time to dig in for the long haul and catch this thing. Or Articuno could be caught in one ball. That works too. Thanks Articuno! There can be no vacation until the scourge of Woodrow Wilson is whipped off the planet. Also this is a terrible place to have a vacation. Seriously, this is a deserted island! No hotels! This joke... there is no honor in this joke. It is made far too easily, too unsubtly. No, I shall turn away from this joke, for to tell it would be akin to taking candy from a baby. Well, here we are. Cinnibar Island in all its glory. I'm sure nothing bad will happen here in the next three years! Well, crap. I guess I should do something else then? We interrupt our scheduled Pokemon broadcasting to bring you the opening to every horror movie ever. Sorry for the short update. I have to go to bed. See you in a week, after Berlin! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamanoir Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 BIRD GO ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted September 13, 2015 Author Share Posted September 13, 2015 Sorry for no update, but I have a problem. So I seem to be unable to upload images to Photobucket. Can anyone help me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted September 16, 2015 Author Share Posted September 16, 2015 Ah, hello there. Didn't see you there. Well, I fixed the problem I was facing, so lets get this show on the road, what do you say? So, we start out this update in the Pokemon mansion. Its the only place we haven't explored, and the walkthrough my ingenious intuition tells me that this is where we should go. My childhood senses are tingling. I will press every button in this godforsaken mansion if I have to! Oh? Whats this? Its proof that the Pokemon games take place in the real world, thats what! Oh? Whats this? Find out next time on Pokemon Firered! Last time, I promise. Wait. Christened? CHRISTened? Damn Christian scientists. Mewtwo is like the lamest name ever. Well, second lamest, after Woodrow Wilson. Oh, whats this? The diary goes on. "Later, Mewtwo would change its name to Donald Trump." My god... it all makes sense now. Well, anyway, this is what I came for. I suppose this is how one opens the gym. Thats a pretty elitist gym, huh? Well, here it is. The Cinnabar Gym. Aren't you happy we went through all that shit to get here? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! Christ Arceus, what does that bring my enemies up to? We now have Straw Feminists, Short Cultists, Woodrow, Neo Nazis, Furries, and Now Communists! Well, better dead than red! Mr. Gym Leader, ready your ball! I just had to include this line. So uh, I kind of done goofed and forgot to record screenshots for Blaine's first three Pokemon. You didn't miss much; I basically surfed them all to death with Guderian. Anyway, this one can't be that hard, can he? Jesus Arceus! You have dared to bring dishonor upon The State. You have sullied his royal majesty with your filthy revolutionary fire. For that, you must pay. Zap, thud, the end. Comrade Blaine, meet your 1989. Next time, we come face to facd with some old enemies, and head out to one of the remake only areas! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamanoir Posted September 16, 2015 Share Posted September 16, 2015 Christian scientists who watched too many cat videos on the Internet. The worst of them all. Toxoplasma gondii have caused far too much trouble... Mewtwo is the lamest name ever Yep. Deuxmiaou is a far better name. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted September 17, 2015 Author Share Posted September 17, 2015 (edited) Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Last time, we beat Comrade Baline. Its utterly shameful that Communists who try to corrupt our precious bodily fluids are allowed to be Gym leaders. Its almost as bad as... Neo Nazis. Speak of the devil, literally. Also, I was hoping to keep it that way. Bitch did you not hear a word I just said? Well actually you didn't since you're a video game character, but still. Wait... Neo Nazis... Island... this can only mean one thing! You're trying to build a Nuclear weapon! Oh, yes, of course! This sounds absolutely spectacular! Anything to contribute to the war against Bolshevism! ...Mewtwo, you are forgiven. Of course! The infamous Celio, butcher of the SS! How did I not see this before? Wait... PC network? Oh god! Its worse than I thought! The Social Justice Warriors and the Neo Nazis have teamed up at last against their common enemy- intelligence! This is the greatest threat to the well read since Republicanism (the belief in Republics, not the party) became a thing! Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput! Well hey if the USA and the Soviets can work together I don't see how Neo Nazis and SJWs can't! I can't believe I came out here, either. What is the unholy alliance of Neo Nazis and Social Justice Warriors planning? How will Dogson stop it? Find out next time on Pokemon Firered! Edited September 17, 2015 by blah2127 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 The LP will be going on hiatus for a few days at least. It's for personal reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted October 4, 2015 Author Share Posted October 4, 2015 (edited) Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Last time, we discovered that Bill the Neo Nazi was teaming up with Celio the SJW to destroy rationality! This time, though, we will fight an even more annoying enemy who cost me something far greater than my sanity! First thing's first, Bill informs me that I must deliver a meteorite to one of his Nazi scientists, presumably to do meteorite related things. Joke's on him, though, because I have no intention of going along with his plan. I'm going north, just to spite him! This eventually brings me to this odd shore. Well, nowhere to go but forwards! A location called Mount Ember, apparently. I guess the explorer that found this place really hated it for some reason. Why else would he name it after a wimpy ass attack that only has 40 power? Well, this probably isn't going to be important. Actually, it won't, since I am not doing post game! "The best argument against democracy is the existence of people who think HMs are a good idea."- Winston Churchill. At least I THINK that's what he said. This strikes me as not being my brightest idea. How is this cave even geologically possible? "May I refer the Prime Minister to the quotation presented by the honorable Mr. Churchill?" Oh my god! Sir! Sir! Are you harmed! How long have you been trapped behind this strength puzzle? Everything is okay now, though. You're going to be all right. Listen. sir, I know that you may have Stockholm Syndrome, and thus are angered seeing me push aside your captors, but this reaction does seem a bit extreme! Now to break out the Pokeballs. Or, you know, you could also make use my Masterball. That works too. Asshat. You know what? Thats exactly what I'm going to call you. Enjoy being stuck with a profane name for the rest of your life. Ladies and gentlemen, we have learned something today. Whenever life gives you asshats, if you run away you will only meet bigger asses wearing ever more absurd hats. Thats why you need to face all the asshats life sends your way! Next time on Pokemon Firered, lets do exactly that. Edited June 11, 2016 by blah the Prussian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naughx Posted April 6, 2016 Share Posted April 6, 2016 (edited) Edit: Wait I just noticed that this thread was very old sorry for the necro. (I somewhat followed the link in Blah's signature)-But I wonder if he will continue it. Edited April 6, 2016 by Naughx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted April 7, 2016 Author Share Posted April 7, 2016 Edit: Wait I just noticed that this thread was very old sorry for the necro. (I somewhat followed the link in Blah's signature) - But I wonder if he will continue it. ...I might at this point over the summer. Too busy now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted June 11, 2016 Author Share Posted June 11, 2016 ...I might at this point over the summer. Too busy now. I'm not busy anymore. Hello and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! In the time since I last updated, lots of shit went down. I got a new dog, I went through the Projectile Motion Investigation, and I snarked Conquest's shitty story to death. Hell, last time I updated I was still blah2127. But I'm seeing this baby through to the end. Last time, we caught Moltres and gave it a humiliating nickname! This time, we help find the daughter of Bill the SS Man and Celio the SJW! Stepping onto (IIRC) 2 Island, I can't help but reflect on the fact that I don't remember shit about what I was doing, for whatever reason. I blame Woodrow. Or Takumi. Whichever works. So basically, Celio's friend wont give me this emerald to power his Political Correctness machine because his daughter, Lostelle, is lost. I mean, Jesus Christ Arceus, what did you expect would happen? Its kind of like naming your kid Hitler and expecting him to be good, or naming your kid Corrin and expecting him to be well written; it just doesn't work that way! I mean, the word Lost is in the name! So yeah... implied pedophilia is a plot point in FRLG. Gamefreak, if I wanted to read over the top edgy Pokemon fan fiction, I'd go to Deviantart! Okay... wow. Three Island. She got so lost that she managed to swim to another island, something not even Guderian can manage! Either you're so incompetent that you let her do that, or you're enough of a dick that she did that on her own. You work for neo Nazis and Social Justice Warriors, so neither would surprise me. All I can ask is this: why the fuck does this beach have fences? Apparently the world of Pokemon has Trump supporters too. The bikers, of course, are rightfully outraged at their mistreatment. Unfortunately, it seems like the bikers have mistaken me for one of their oppressors! Looks like a battle is at hand! A few turns of The State Earthquaking some Grimers into oblivion later, and its time to fight the boss! Guderian dispatches his Weezing without much difficulty. Unfortunately, his Muk doesn't fain at Guderian's Hydro Cannon, and the latter goes down next turn. Nothing Richtofen can't handle. And so they leave. Well, so much for that particular diversion. Next time on Pokemon Firered, lets try finding Lostelle for real this time, eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrystalPoke Posted June 12, 2016 Share Posted June 12, 2016 Just a heads-up, you should use the ''Screenshoot'' tool of your emulator to take the pictures, they will be smaller. Those ones are too big for crappy Internet like mine is at the moment, and they will do better to your spectator's eyes xD Example: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted June 12, 2016 Author Share Posted June 12, 2016 Just a heads-up, you should use the ''Screenshoot'' tool of your emulator to take the pictures, they will be smaller. Those ones are too big for crappy Internet like mine is at the moment, and they will do better to your spectator's eyes xD Example: Unfortunately, all the pictures of the lp have already been taken. I'll keep it in mind for next time, though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 Hello, and welcome back to Pokemon Firered! Last tie, we fought some bikers who were victims of oppression! This time, we foil the plan of Bill the Nazi and Celio the SJW! Appropriately enough, we begin this update on a bridge named after 007 himself. Following this bridge, of course, takes us to this forest that looks like a giant pissed on it. How wonderful. After walking through a bunch more piss trees, I see my target. A scary Pokemon? What could it be? Heracross? Gyrados? Dark... ...Hypno. Really? Hypno isn't scary, it's in PU! Vorbeck decides to demonstrate Hypno's unthreateningness with a good fist to the face. My personal favorite method, at any rate. Unfortunately, I must sacrifice this little girl in order to foil the aspirations of the evil Bill! So anyway, Lostelle's dad gives me what I was supposed to find... ...aaaaand into the sea with it. The sinister machinations of Bill and Celio have been foiled forever! Now all that remain are Woodrow, the Shorts Cultists, the Straw Feminists, and... Giovanni. Lets get started on that last one then, shall we? Next time on Pokemon Firered: we get started on that one, then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moblin Major General Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Hypno is a pedophilic Pokemon. Lostelle is a little girl. What do you think was gonna happen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 Hypno is a pedophilic Pokemon. Lostelle is a little girl. What do you think was gonna happen?Again, if I wanted edgy Pokemon fan fiction I'd go to Deviantart. I'm actually referring to an absurdly edgy fanfic I read a while back because Imwas a dumbass kid. It had blood and gore and everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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