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Corrupt a wish: FE edition


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Granted, all of them now have Jedah’s stats and spells

I wish fe7’s Raven wasn’t so edgy

Edited by Sooks1016
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Granted, but the game becomes so ahead of its time that it can never fit on a gba cartridge, and the game never gets released. Also stopping fe7 from ever being released.

I wish more people liked Dedue x Annette

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Granted, but they play Lyn mode to recieve praise from her then stop after that 'cause they don't like Eliwood.

I wish that people liked FE6.

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Granted, but they all came from smash and stop playing when they realize a Roy solo run isn’t gonna work for their first ever FE play through after a couple chapters. They dropped the game, but still liked it.

I wish fe7’s final map had more deployment slots totally not for support grinding

Edited by Sooks1016
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Granted, but hector and Eliwood get replaced with two more tacticians, both of whom Lyn would also like to ██████████ and just shove the whole thing in there ████████████████████████████ she thought it was pretty hot████████████████████ and have it get everywhere███████████████████████████████████ she wasn’t sure if there would be room for the third one ████████████████████████████████████████ the noises coming out of her mouth were louder than anything she had ever heard before  ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

I wish Beserk staves didn’t exist

Edited by Sooks1016
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Granted, but your skill comes from hacking the game to cap all character stats, maxing all weapon and support rank, and writing whatever items you want into character’s inventories.

I wish Annette x Dedue was canon

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Now they are name changed into something else that reduced your units HP down to 1 and have double the durability and you can never earn one throughout the whole game and it's impossible to hack them into your run.

I wish the next game had an all new Funky Mode.

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You have to win a dancing minigame with a DDR board to get your dancer, and you can't keep the dancer unless you win the minigame every chapter.

I wish people who enjoy lunatic and maddening didn't make me feel stupid.

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Granted. Those modes no longer exist, so they play Normal and Hard with incredible efficiency and chase all newcomers to the franchise because they're so hard-core with their LTC strats.

I wish for the next FE game to be designed in a way that is ironman-friendly but still has casual mode as an option.

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Granted... but instead of improving QoL or presentation, they just hit the story with major censorship and add an avatar that can romance Deidre or Sigurd making the plot no longer make sense.
I wish that next Fire Emblem is less of a drag to replay than 3 Houses.

Edited by The Roger The Paladin
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Granted, but your copy self destructs after beating it and/or deletes itself from your switch, and you’re no longer able to download it or purchase a physical copy.

I wish Corrin could return to Nohr just to get close enough to them in order to get the drop on Garon and then go to Hoshido once the deed is done instead of initially waltzing over to Hoshido

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Due to the lack of Garon's presence, Hoshido is invigorated enough to bring a one sided stomp fest over Nohr and then assimilate them into their country while subjugating them to enslavement so bad that it makes the worst imaginable war crimes in human history look like a spring picnic with Dora the Explorer.

I wish Alm's dong armor actually protected something.

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It protects a dark eldritch void that insta kills anyone who looks at it. Celica gets insta killed when trying to initiate sexy times.

I wish Joe Brogie and Joe Zieja would start a stream show called Not So Average Joes.

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You can adopt one pre timeskip, but after that the poor thing is crushed beneath the rubble of Garreg Machs remains and Byleth finds the remains only mostly decomposed right next to Jeralt's grave.

I wish there was a dimensional merge that would fuse all of the legendary swords into a giant butter knife that no mortal could ever wield.

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Granted, but now there's a cosmic butter monster that has to be fought. And since no one can wield the butter knife, everybody dies. Game over. *womp womp*

I wish there was an alternate route where Dimitri and Edelgard could switch their roles in the story.

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Granted, but when Dimitri gets close to Edelgard to teach her how to dance, she pepper sprays him and kicks him to the ground. They end their friendship so Edelgard barely cares when he’s revealed as the lightning king (until he invades her country).

I wish Claude released a mixtape.

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