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Part 1 Synopsis


VincentASM
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The story takes place three years after the events of Path of Radiance, and is set, at first, in Daein. Since the end of the previous war, the country is being occupied by the country of Begnion, which assisted Crimea. The Occupational Army is not at all concerned by the citizens, doing nothing about the bandit attacks, hoarding supplies such as medicine, imprisoning most of the able bodied men in labor camps, and imprisoning woman for reasons that aren't explored any further.

Our story begins in a run down fortress, where red clad soldiers search by torchlight for a group known as the Dawn Brigade. Two of them approuch a hole in a wall, where, just beyond, a silver haired woman holding a small, orange bird and a light tomb cowers. The bird she's holding chirps, giving her away, and she is quickly captured. The soldiers express delight at catching "The Silver Haired Maiden" who is also a fortune teller. As they gloat, however, a young man, who is Sothe from the previous game, leaps down from above and dispatches several of them, before the girl, Micaiah, uses her tomb to blind the group. The two then dissapear into the forest.

Several days later in the capital city of Nevassa, Micaiah waits with another member of the Dawn Brigade, Edward, for another member, Leonardo, to appear. Edward reveals to us that Micaiah has a "farsight" which allows her to see into the future on ocaison. While the two wait, bandits begin attacking the townspeople, and a woman, along with a young boy named Nico, ask the two for help. They set off, and are accompanied by their companion Leonardo, who they were waiting for. After they dispatch the bandits, they are spotted by members of the Begnion Occupational Army, and quickly flee. One of the Soldiers is killed when their commander, Jarod, leader of the occupational army, stabs him for not immediatly pursing them. He expresses amusement about the possibility of excitement.

The Dawn Brigade returns to their hideout, where they are met by their companions Sothe and Nolan. Upon learning of what happened, the group decides to leave Nevassa. After a small skirmish, they find the marketplace, where the townspeople gladly assist. WHile running ahead, Micaiah suddenly has a vision of a tragedy about to happen, and turns back. The townspeople are attacked by the armies archers, and the boy from earlier, Nico, is hit by a shot. As he lays dying in the street, Jarod warns the townspeople that this was caused by the Dawn Brigade. However, at that moment, Micaiah returns, and uses her skill, Sacrifice, in order to heal the boy, while exhausting her. Sothe carries her to safety afterwards, and the group leaves Nevassa.

While heading towards another town, the group is approuched by a young priestess, Laura, whose attempting to get medicine for her sick abbot. The group raids a mansion to help reclaim supplies hoarded by the Begnion forces. Afterwards, when regrouping, they find that Laura has gone missing. They split up to look for her, and, while doing so, Micaiah is captured and thrown in prison with Laura. Within prison, they share a cell with three people: Aimee, one of the merchants from the previous game, Ilyana, a mage who accompanied the merchants from the previous game, and a robed, hooded, shy figure named Kurth.

Sothe and the others break in with the assistance of a soldiers, Aran, who is Laura's old friend. He joins the group as they fight their way out, and they eventaually with the rest fo the merchant caravan, Muston, George, and Daniel. There, they discuss the rumor of a long lost son of King Ashnards, who is hiding in the desert, looking for soldiers. They decide to investigate, and the merchants join them.

The group stumbles upon old, laguz-built ruins, which are infested with Laguz-Beast tribe bandits. Micaiah's bird, Yune, is drawn away, deeper into the ruins, where they discover a Heron named Rafieal, and two Wolf Laguz, Queen Nailah and her bodygaurd, Volug. They explain that Rafieal had been called to this place from across the desert, to the unknown country of Hatari. They decide to join up with the group.

Later, Volug, after being assigned to assist the Dawn Brigade in battle by Nailah, smells something and takes the others to a small establishment, where three people are holding off an army. They are familier faces: Tauroneo, a former Daein general, Zihark, a Laguz Sympathizing swordsman, and Jill, a dragon rider. All three fought, along with Sothe and Ilyana, in the previous war. They are gaurding the Prince, a young man by the name of Pelleas, along with his mother Almedha, and his adviser, Izuka. Izuka, despite his off putting personality, convinces Micaiah to join up with the army, as a figurehead to the revolution, despite Sothe's objections.

Later, the Liberation army decides to move towards Marado for their first battle, following a vision of Micaiah's fortelling ill chances where Izuka first planed to attack. In Marado, General Jarod is keeping a close eye on the daughter of the fomer lord of Talrega, Fiona. Fiona is the daughter of one of one of the Four Riders, Lanvenga. Upon Micaiah meeting Fiona's in combat, a Daein leader plans to use hostages to make the group surrender. As they do, per Micaiahs vision-induenced suggestion, he announces his plans to kill the hostages anyways. Fiona revolts, along with several of the Marado Knights, who grab the hostages and join the side of the Liberation Army.

Afterwards, the group plans to start breaking into prison camps for soldiers. Izuka suggests that they poison the lake nearby the largest camp, to the horror and disgust of Micaiah. Izuka has also begun leaving Pelleas out of the war meetings, assuming the Princes authority in his absence. Tauroneo leads a diversion, instead, while Micaiah breaks into the prison and lets the prisoners escape. During this battle, three new fighters show up: Tormod, a mage who was a leader of a Laguz settlement in Begnion who faught in the war in the previous game, Maurim, his foster father and a Tiger Laguz, and Vika, a former Raven-Laguz slave. The three assist the group in the prison break.

Tormod had been running an errand of Sothe, informing the Apostle of Begnion of the condition of things in Daein. She had had no idea of these things, and ordered an investigation. Unbeknownst to her, the Begnion Senate has been purposefully behind all of this, lead by a senator known as Lekain. The senators, upon learning that the Apostles most trusted adviser, Sephiram, is going to be heading up the investigation, decide to lay the blame upon the Occupational Army.

The Occupational Army, becoming desperate, plans a trap within the swamps, luring the group out with prisoners. They go anyways, outwitting the army and rescuing the prisoners with the assistance of Rafieal, Nailah, and the Freedom fighters. Upon returning, it becomes more and more obvious of the adoration Micaiah has earned from the army members.

Later, Tormod is distressed when he finds that Maurim is ill. The laguz had ingested a drug that creates souless, killing machines known as the Feral Ones. He is saved by the song of Rafieal, though. It is revealed that the drug was provided by Izuka, who saw no harm in sacrificing the man in order to create a fighting machine for the upcoming battles.

Days later, Tormod delivers news of the investigation of Daein, and that the army has practically won. The entire army rejoices, except for Micaiah. That night, she wanders away from the celebrations to rest in the forest...where she is found by Jarod. The man, outraged at his impending fate, decides to take vengeance. He has his second in command, Alder, leave a diversion, and comes after her with a small group of soldiers. When all looks lost...a figure warps into the clearing.

The figure is The Black Knight, who was thought to be killed by General Ike of the Crimean Liberation Army three years ago. Jarod does not believe the man is the famed Daein warrior, and attacks. While fighting, he reveals to Micaiah that Prince Pelleas is nothing compared to her, and that the people of Daein will suffer more from her death. However, he is defeated, but before he can be killed, his second in command, Alder, takes the blow for him. Jarod is spared to allow his subordinate to be burried.

The next day, Daien forces begin assaulting the city of Nevassa, where they are occupying. The Daein Liberation army, after an inspiring speech from Pelleas, moves out. While the main forces take control of the capital, the Daien Keep is assaulted by Micaiah, Sothe, and their friends. Upon defeating Jarod, they reclaim Daeinn personally.

Tormod, Maurim, Vika, Nailah and Rafieal all leave to go to Gallia for reasons relating to Rafieal's past, while Volug is left to gaurd Micaiah by Nailah. Days later, the official coronation of Prince Pelleas takes place, and Daein finally has a new king. Afterwards, Pelleas makes Micaiah his official Commander of the army, which now consists of the former freedom fighters, minus the Merchants and Ilyana, who leave after the coronation.

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The obvious mistakes/typos I found. Bear with me, my spelling isn't good either. >_>

Edward reveals to us that Micaiah has a "farsight" which allows her to see into the future on ocaison.

Occasion?

WHile running ahead, Micaiah suddenly has a vision of a tragedy about to happen, and turns back.

h much?

Micaiah's bird, Yune, is drawn away, deeper into the ruins, where they discover a Heron named Rafieal, and two Wolf Laguz, Queen Nailah and her bodygaurd, Volug.

Bodyguard?

They are gaurding the Prince, a young man by the name of Pelleas, along with his mother Almedha, and his adviser, Izuka.

Guarding?

The next day, Daien forces begin assaulting the city of Nevassa, where they are occupying. The Daein Liberation army, after an inspiring speech from Pelleas, moves out. While the main forces take control of the capital, the Daien Keep is assaulted by Micaiah, Sothe, and their friends. Upon defeating Jarod, they reclaim Daeinn personally.

Daein?

Tormod, Maurim, Vika, Nailah and Rafieal all leave to go to Gallia for reasons relating to Rafieal's past, while Volug is left to gaurd Micaiah by Nailah.

Guard?

I think that were all I could found. I don't know if I'm correct or not though. >_>

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Sothe and the others break in with the assistance of a soldiers, Aran, who is Laura's old friend. He joins the group as they fight their way out, and they eventaually with the rest fo the merchant caravan, Muston, George, and Daniel. There, they discuss the rumor of a long lost son of King Ashnards, who is hiding in the desert, looking for soldiers. They decide to investigate, and the merchants join them.

Just 3 small things I noticed. last 2 aren't that big of a deal though

1. Only Aran helped them in so soldiers should be soldier.

2. imo "the long lost song of king ashnard" sounded better to me

3. Back with Aran he didn't help Sothe in only Edward Leonardo and Nolan. Sothe said "How did you get in without my help" implying he knew nothing of Aran until Edward says one of the soldiers let them in to save Laura.

Like I said I'd personally change all three but #1 def. should make soldiers singular but I'll leave the other 2 up to u and the writer

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Two of them approuch a hole in a wall, where, just beyond, a silver haired woman holding a small, orange bird and a light tomb cowers. The bird she's holding chirps, giving her away, and she is quickly captured. The soldiers express delight at catching "The Silver Haired Maiden" who is also a fortune teller. As they gloat, however, a young man, who is Sothe from the previous game, leaps down from above and dispatches several of them, before the girl, Micaiah, uses her tomb to blind the group. The two then dissapear into the forest.

approuch = approach

light = Light

tomb = tome

dissapear = disappear

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Thanks ^^

Besides the points mentioned, can someone also confirm if the events mentioned are correct as well? From what I've seen and heard, everything looks mostly correct, but I'm not too familiar with the smaller details of the plot.

Also, any suggestions for things to add? Or does it contain enough detail as is?

Edited by VincentASM
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Here's what I've done so far. I tried to add everyone's input, although I might have forgotten or tweaked some points.

There were at least three things I wasn't too sure of.

1. When Micaiah and Laura are busted out of jail, who exactly did the deed? I couldn't really understand what King_Soren meant. Also, what did Aran do to help? Although I should probably check out the game script for this.

2. What does this mean? "The Liberation Army decides to move towards Marado for their first battle, following a vision of Micaiah's foretelling ill chances where Izuka first planned to attack."

3. Same here. "Tauroneo leads a diversion, instead, while Micaiah breaks into the prison and lets the prisoners escape."

4. Oh yeah, I still need to work on the "farsight" sentence.

Partially revised version

(Removed)

Edited by VincentASM
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Here's what I've done so far. I tried to add everyone's input, although I might have forgotten or tweaked some points.

There were at least three things I wasn't too sure of.

1. When Micaiah and Laura are busted out of jail, who exactly did the deed? I couldn't really understand what King_Soren meant. Also, what did Aran do to help? Although I should probably check out the game script for this.

Sothe broke in by himself being a thief and all and released everyone in the cell. Aran let Edward Leonardo and Nolan sneak in "If your here to save Laura follow me". Not to mention helping the group escape if Laura talks to him.

edit: for #2 Izuka,Micaiah,Pelleas were trying to find a place they could begin to liberate Daein. Izuka chose Talrega but Micaiah protested since it had bad weather at the time of year (and is backed up by Jill) So she decides to liberate Marado. So the liberation army liberates Marado.

for #3: The orginal plan was poison them but Micaiah protested. So the general distracted most of the troups guarding the camp so the Liberation Army came in to seize the camp and free the prisoners with less fighting.

Edited by King_Soren
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The soldiers express delight at catching "The Silver Haired Maiden" who is also a fortune teller.

This description is a bit vague for my tastes. The significance for her to the Begnion soldiers is not explained. Maybe something like:

"The soldiers express delight at catching "The Silver Haired Maiden", a fortune teller of some renown. She possesses the ability to heal without a staff and is a member of the aforementioned Dawn Brigade."

Several days later in the capital city of Nevassa, Micaiah waits with another member of the Dawn Brigade, Edward, for another member, Leonardo, to appear. Edward reveals to us that Micaiah has a "farsight" which allows her to see into the future on ocaison. While the two wait, bandits begin attacking the townspeople, and a woman, along with a young boy named Nico, ask the two for help.

The mention of Micaiah's farsight seems a little vague. May want to add that she cannot choose what to see or when. As it is now, it could be interpreted as "Micaiah can sometimes see the future". It explains the when, but not the what.

Also, I'd edit the first sentence in the quote to something like "Several days later in the capital city of Nevassa, Micaiah awaits the arrival of another member of the Dawn Brigade, Leonardo, with another member about her age named Edward." There is just something about the original that bothers me. "Micaiah waits for Leonardo with Edward" just sounds better than "Micaiah and Edward wait for Leonardo." That's your choice, though.

As for the third sentence, it should probably be something like "While the two wait, bandits attack the townspeople, and a woman, along with a young boy named Nico, ask them for help."

The Dawn Brigade returns to their hideout, where they are met by their companions Sothe and Nolan. Upon learning of what happened, the group decides to leave Nevassa. After a small skirmish, they find the marketplace, where the townspeople gladly assist. WHile running ahead, Micaiah suddenly has a vision of a tragedy about to happen, and turns back. The townspeople are attacked by the armies archers, and the boy from earlier, Nico, is hit by a shot.

I'd make it something like:

"The aforementioned members of the Dawn Brigade return to their current hideout, where they are soon accompanied by companions Sothe and Nolan. After Nolan and Sothe learn of what happened from the others, the group decides to leave Nevassa. After a small skirmish, they find the marketplace, where the townspeople are more than happy to assist. As she attempts to escape, Micaiah suddenly has a vision of a tragedy about to happen, and turns back. The townspeople are attacked by the army's archers, and the boy from earlier, Nico, is hit by an arrow."

While heading towards another town, the group is approuched by a young priestess, Laura, whose attempting to get medicine for her sick abbot.

This is more of a grammatical edit:

"While heading towards another town, the group is approached by a young priestess, Laura, who is attempting to get medicine for her sick abbot."

They are familier faces: Tauroneo, a former Daein general, Zihark, a Laguz Sympathizing swordsman, and Jill, a dragon rider.

Jill's vague description doesn't go well with those of Tauroneo and Zihark's. I suggest mentioned her ancestry.

"They are familiar faces from Path of Radiance: Tauroneo, a former Daein general, Zihark, a Laguz sympathizing swordsman, and Jill, daughter of former Daein General Shiharam."

Other than that, there are numerous mispelling and grammatical errors. No where near ready to be added.

Edited by Jem
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  • 1 month later...

Finally finished the first revision.

Does anyone know what they meant by this?

The next day, Daein forces begin assaulting the city of Nevassa, where they are occupying. After an inspiring speech from Pelleas, the Daein Liberation army moves out for their final battle. While the main forces take control of the capital, Daein Keep is assaulted by Micaiah, Sothe, and their allies. Upon defeating Jarod, they reclaim Daein personally.

Revised version

The story takes place three years after the events of Path of Radiance and is set, at first, in the Kingdom of Daein. Since the end of the previous war, known as the Mad King's War, the country is occupied by the Begnion Empire, which assisted Crimea. Begnion's Occupational Army is not at all concerned with the citizens, doing nothing about the bandit attacks, hoarding supplies such as medicine, imprisoning most of the able-bodied men in labor camps, and imprisoning woman for reasons that aren't explored any further.

Our story begins in a run down fortress, where red-clad soldiers search by torchlight for a group known as the Dawn Brigade. Two of the soldiers approach a hole in a wall where, just beyond, a silver haired woman holding a small, orange bird and a magic tome cowers. The bird she's holding chirps, giving her away, and she is quickly captured. The soldiers express delight at catching "The Silver Haired Maiden", a key member of the aforementioned Dawn Brigade. As they gloat, however, a young man, Sothe, leaps down from above and dispatches several of them. Following his lead, the girl, Micaiah, casts a light-based spell to blind the soldiers. The two then disappear into the forest.

Several days later, in the capital city of Nevassa, Micaiah waits for Leonardo, along with Edward. Edward reveals to us that Micaiah possesses a "farsight" which allows her to see into the future on random occasions. While the two wait, bandits attack the townspeople, and a woman, along with a young boy named Nico, ask Micaiah and Edward for help. They set off, and are soon accompanied by Leonardo, who they were waiting for. After they dispatch the bandits, they are spotted by members of the Occupational Army, and quickly flee. One of the soldiers is killed by their commander, Jarod, for not immediately pursuing them. Jarod expresses amusement about the possibility of excitement from dealing with the Dawn Brigade.

The three members of the Dawn Brigade return to their hideout, where they are met by their remaining companions, Sothe and Nolan. Upon learning of what had happened, the group makes the decision to leave Nevassa. After a small skirmish, they find their way to the marketplace, where the townspeople gladly assist them. While running ahead, Micaiah suddenly has a vision of a tragedy about to happen, and stops to turn back. As predicted, the townspeople are attacked by the army's archers, and the boy from earlier, Nico, is struck by an arrow. As Nico lies, dying in the street, Jarod warns the townspeople that this was caused by the Dawn Brigade. However, at that moment, Micaiah returns and she uses her skill, Sacrifice, to heal the boy. This ends up exhausting her and Sothe comes to carry her away to safety. Afterwards, the group leaves Nevassa.

While heading towards another town, the Dawn Brigade is approached by a young priestess, Laura, who wishes to obtain medicine for her sick abbot. The group raids a mansion to help reclaim supplies hoarded by the Begnion forces. Afterwards, while regrouping, they discover that Laura has gone missing and they split up to find her. Micaiah finds herself captured and thrown into prison, along with Laura. Inside prison, they share a cell with three people: Aimee, a merchant, Ilyana, a mage who accompanied the merchants, and a robed, shy figure named Kurth.

Not long afterwards, Sothe breaks into the prison and releases Micaiah and her companions. They meet up with Edward and the others, who entered with the assistance of Aran, a soldier and old friend of Laura's. Aran joins the group as they fight their way out, and they eventually meet with the rest of the merchants: Muston, George, and Daniel. Together, they discuss the rumor of a long lost son of King Ashnard's, who is hiding in the desert and looking for soldiers. They decide to investigate this rumor, and the merchants accompany them.

Within the desert, the group stumble upon old, Laguz-built ruins, which are infested with Laguz bandits. Micaiah's bird, Yune, is drawn away deeper into the ruins, where they discover a Heron named Rafiel, and two Wolf Laguz – Queen Nailah and her bodyguard, Volug. Nailah explains that Rafiel had been called across the desert to this unknown country of Hatari. The three Laguz decide to join with the group, with Nailah assigning Volug to assist them in battle.

Later, Volug, smells something and takes the others to a small establishment, where three people are holding off an army. These three are all familiar faces: Tauroneo, a former Daein general, Zihark, a Laguz-sympathizing swordsman, and Jill, a dracoknight. All three fought, along with Sothe and Ilyana, in the previous war. They are guarding the prince, a young man by the name of Pelleas, along with his mother Almedha, and his adviser, Izuka. After the enemy army is driven away, Izuka, speaks with Micaiah and convinces her to join up with the prince's army, as a figurehead of the revolution, much to Sothe's objections.

The newly-formed Daein Liberation Army decides to move towards Marado for their first battle, following a vision of Micaiah's, which foretold ill chances at Talrega – the location Izuka first planned to attack. In Marado, General Jarod is keeping a close eye on Fiona, the daughter of the former lord of Marado. When Micaiah meets Fiona in combat, a Daein commander uses hostages to force Micaiah and her group to surrender. Per Micaiah's vision-influenced suggestion, they surrender, but the commander announces his plans to kill the hostages anyway. Fiona makes the decision to revolt, along with several of the Marado Knights. They grab the hostages and join the side of the Liberation Army.

Afterwards, the group plans to start breaking into prison camps to rescue soldiers. Izuka suggests that they poison the lake next to the largest camp, to the horror and disgust of Micaiah. Izuka has also begun leaving Pelleas out of the war meetings, assuming the prince's authority in his absence. Instead, Tauroneo creates a diversion at the camp, while Micaiah breaks in and lets the prisoners escape. During this battle, three new fighters show up – Tormod, a young mage who was a leader of a Laguz settlement in Begnion, Maurim, his foster father and a Tiger Laguz, and Vika, a Raven and former Laguz slave. The three assist the Liberation Army in the prison break.

Tormod had been running an errand for Sothe, informing the Apostle of Begnion of the situation at Daein. The Apostle, Sanaki, had had no idea of these happenings and ordered an immediate investigation. Unbeknownst to her, the Begnion Senate had been purposefully behind all of this, led by a powerful senator, Lekain. Upon learning that the Apostle's most trusted advisor, Sephiran, would be heading up the investigation, the senators decide to lay the blame upon the Occupational Army.

The Occupational Army, becoming desperate, plans a trap within the swamps, luring out the Liberation Army with prisoners. The Liberation Army goes to the swamp anyway, outwitting the Occupational Army and rescuing the prisoners with the assistance of Rafiel, Nailah, and the freedom fighters. Upon returning, it becomes more and more obvious of the adoration Micaiah has earned from the army members.

Later, Tormod is distressed when he finds that Muarim is ill. Muarim had ingested a drug that transforms Laguz into soulless, killing machines known as the Feral Ones. Luckily, he is saved by Rafiel's galldr of rebirth. It is revealed that the drug was provided by Izuka, who saw no harm in sacrificing Muarim in order to create a fighting machine for the upcoming battles.

Days later, Tormod delivers news of the Apostle's investigation of Daein and states that the Liberation Army has practically won. The entire army rejoices, except for Micaiah. That night, she wanders away from the celebrations to rest in the forest, where she is found by Jarod. Outraged at his impending fate, Jarod decides to take vengeance. He has his second-in-command, Alder, lead a diversion and comes after Micaiah with a small group of soldiers. When all looks lost, a shadowy figure teleports into the clearing.

This figure is the Black Knight, one of Daein's Four Riders, who was thought to have perished in the war three years ago. Jarod does not believe the man is the famed Daein general, and continues his attack. While fighting, Jarod reveals to Micaiah that Prince Pelleas is nothing compared to her, and that the people of Daein will suffer more from her death than his. However, Jarod is defeated, but before he can be killed, his second-in-command, Alder, takes the blow for him. Jarod is spared by the Black Knight to allow his subordinate to be buried.

The next day, Daein forces begin assaulting the city of Nevassa, where they are occupying. After an inspiring speech from Pelleas, the Daein Liberation army moves out for their final battle. While the main forces take control of the capital, Daein Keep is assaulted by Micaiah, Sothe, and their allies. Upon defeating Jarod, they reclaim Daein personally.

With Daein rescued, Tormod, Maurim, Vika, Nailah and Rafiel all leave for Gallia for reasons relating to Rafiel's past. Meanwhile Volug is left to guard Micaiah by Nailah's orders. Days later, the official coronation of Prince Pelleas takes place, and Daein finally has a new king. Afterwards, Pelleas makes Micaiah his official Commander of the army, which now consists of the former freedom fighters, minus the merchants and Ilyana, who leave after the coronation.

Edited by VincentASM
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It'd be something like

The next day, Daein forces begin assaulting the city of Nevassa, which is being occupied by the (remaining) Begnion Occupation Army.

Play RD Vincent

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