Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 YES BECAUSE I AM BORED RULES: I MAKES THE RULES SHUT UP basically this is a turn based fun generator by ESME okay BEGIN You wake up in a lovely little meadow in lovely little nowhere. You're not scared-- kinda happy actually --but that's just because you're a Gary-Stu. Anyway, you wake up and feel like examining your surroundings a bit more. First, you decide to look: 1. To the Left 2. To the Right 3. Forwards 4. Backwards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 2. To the Right! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 2. To the Right! You decide to look to your right. In the distance is a beautiful, glittering spring in which several sexy babetastic fairies are bathing in. C'mon, Macho Guy! Make a move! 1. Hit on the fairies. 2. Show the fairies a really neat dance. 3. Tell the fairies about your favorite videogame. 4. Talk to the shy fairy with glasses. 5. Bathe with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Ooooooh 2. Show the fairies a really neat dance! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terrador Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) DERP SLOWDRAW DISREGARD Edited February 14, 2013 by Terrador Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fruity Insanity Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 6. Shoo them away. They're being provocative. I don't like provocative. ;-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) Ooooooh 2. Show the fairies a really neat dance! You show the fairies how to move it like Jagger! They're actually really impressed. Wow, go you! One of the fairies walks up to you... "Greetings, hunky male humanoid. I am Triceps, the Princess of the Fairy World. Your alluring cultural dance has kindled within me an adventurous passion! Let's kill an ogre... together~" Oh my! What'll you do, Macho Guy??? 1. Go with her. 2. Decline the offer. 3. "Got any male fairies around here?" Edited February 14, 2013 by Esme Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 1. Go with her! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 1. Go with her! (Well, you're certainly not a boring Gary-Stu. That's good.) You decide to help her slay an ogre. She tells you that there's a humungous ogre living in the mountains in Fairy World. However... it seems you no weapons. In fact, you'v got no class, girl! Fortunately, Triceps has the resources to get you trained up real good n' real quick! So... choose a class. Each one has its own specialty. And don't worry, your Gary-Stuness allows you to change, but only if certain conditions are met. Anyway... make a choice! 1. Wizard -- Fuck yeah, Magic! You've got a crazy gifted mind and can fling shit like Fireballs and Icebolts from a long distance. However, you wear robes and those things will make you considerably less manly and really sucky at taking hits. 2. Thief -- You're so dark and edgy that you cut people just by looking at them! Well, no, not really, but you CAN open locked doors, chests, etc. You can also steal from stupid idiots and hide in the dark as well as a black guy! 3. Warrior -- The manliest class of them all. You're a big, hunky guy that carries a huge axe! You may not be able to take magical hits well, but damn are you STRONG AS HELL. 4. Alchemist -- You're a creepy psuedo-wizard with a fetish for liquids. This doesn't bode well with others, but who cares? You can craft potions and poisons that do CRAZY STUFF! 5. Shapeshifter -- You're an incredibly gay shapeshifter! You can shift your shape into anything, really. A rock, a piece of gum, a babetastic lady, a crazy handsome guy, an old dude, a shaggy hag, Austin Powers... the possibilities are endless! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 5. Shapeshifter -- You're an incredibly gay shapeshifter! You can shift your shape into anything, really. A rock, a piece of gum, a babetastic lady, a crazy handsome guy, an old dude, a shaggy hag, Austin Powers... the possibilities are endless! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xinnidy Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) 1. Wizard because magic :D Edit: Dammit SB Edited February 14, 2013 by Xinnidy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Refa Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 3. Warrior because macho. If you don't pick warrior, I'll have to take out my rage on SB...again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 NO NOT AGAIN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 5. Shapeshifter -- You're an incredibly gay shapeshifter! You can shift your shape into anything, really. A rock, a piece of gum, a babetastic lady, a crazy handsome guy, an old dude, a shaggy hag, Austin Powers... the possibilities are endless! Excellent choice! Your flamboyance is literally unmatched! Yay! Triceps has weirdly mixed feelings about you, but that's okay. "Ah, so you've taken the role of a shapeshifter... My, my. Whould've thought? Anyway, let's go to the Fairy World and slay that ogre! All we have to do is-- wait... where's... WHERE'S MY PORTAL SUMMONING GUN THING?!" Triceps frantically searches the nearby bushes, but alas! She find not a single PORTAL SUMMONING GUN THING! She questions her fellow fairy-babes. Seven of them to be exact. The first one, a fiery red fairy, says: "That was a precious heirloom! Triceps, you and I both know that only a dashing rogue would've wanted to make off with such an item." The second one, a chill blue fairy, says: "Woah, Triceps, like... calm down, sis. You need to just bathe for a little bit longer and think about where you, like, put it okay?" The third one, a stylish yellow fairy, says: "Dahhhhling, I couldn't care less about the PORTAL SUMMONG GUN THING. You shouldn't either. Let's go to a fashion show and forget about all of this! Dahhhhling, you'll have a grand time there. In fact, you'll forget all about the gun thing in no time~" The fourth one, a very... hairy... erm... purple fairy, says (in a REALLY deep voice): "Uh... hey... uh, Triceps, I... uh... you should... uh... maybe... I dunno..." The fifth one, a sweet brown fairy, says: "Honey, you gotta beat some and take names! Mmm-hm, gurl, I bet it's those hoes from the Sprite World that took yo magic gun thang. Gurl, you gots to get dat shit back mmm-hm." The sixth one, a smart-looking green fairy, says: "I do believe I have a means of obtaining knowledge about the whereabouts of your precious piece of technology. Give me the word and I shall immediately consult my colleagues to do a swift, accurate survey of this field. Trust me, sister." The seventh one, an unusually small white fairy, says: "Akchamua! Agesoi dululu semtuut. Grevois a dus vrem das dululu. Dululu loin sempa droit es minicars. MINICARS." ...Which fairy's suggestion will you take seriously? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 The seventh one, an unusually small white fairy, says: "Akchamua! Agesoi dululu semtuut. Grevois a dus vrem das dululu. Dululu loin sempa droit es minicars. MINICARS." TRUST IN THE MINICARS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 The seventh one, an unusually small white fairy, says: "Akchamua! Agesoi dululu semtuut. Grevois a dus vrem das dululu. Dululu loin sempa droit es minicars. MINICARS." TRUST IN THE MINICARS You decide to listen to 7th fairy. (God knows why...) She speaks in a strange, unfamiliar language. Though she does seem to have an obsession with minicars... Triceps follows you and tries to communicate with the fairy. "Hello? I don't recognize you. Hm... you're an awfully strange-looking fairy. Whatever, I assume you're going to help me find the PORTAL SUMMONING GUN THING so I don't really care. Can you lead us in the direction you saw it?" The white fairy tilts its head. Aww! It's so cute! It points towards the north, which leads to an ominous crater that was once created by a great meteorite. Could the PORTAL SUMMONING GUN THING possibly be there? Well... we're soon to find out, aren't we? You and Triceps follow the White Fairy to the crater site. On your way you encounter your first enemy! Yes! Time to test your skills! Click the spoiler to find out your opponent... [spoiler=ENEMY ENCOUNTER] Oh sweet mother of Jojo! It's a pile of Crazy Peanuts! They're hungry, and they're out for BLOOD. STATS: HP: 50 MP: 0 ABILITY: Allergies -- Touching this enemy can be potentially fatal if your genetics hate you! Fortunately, your GARY-STUNESS grants you the first move. What do you do? (DING DONG: This is where your creativity comes into play. Your next post is basically your attack, set-up, etc. Your current party members, Triceps and White Fairy are NPC's and will therefore be controlled by me. Other users can become characters, but only one at a time during certain events. Don't worry, the events will happen often. Alrighty, go at it!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Shapteshift into a chair! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 Shapteshift into a chair! You go "Poof!" and turn into a gorgeous oak chair. My god, I want to display you in a mansion! ...But beauty only gets you so far. Let's see how you fare in MORTAL PEANUT COMBAT. "HOW DARE YOU MAKE A MOCKERY OF OUR MOTHERKIN, HUMAN. WE SHALL SHOW YOU THE WRATH OF OUR PEOPLE." Suddenly, the peanuts all tumble upon you! Oh god! ...Huh, they didn't do much to you. After all, you're a sturdy chair made of the flesh and marrow of the peanut motherkin. "SWEET PEANUT GODS, WE CANNOT DEFEAT AN ENEMY OF OUR KIND. WE CALL UPON YOUR ANGRY WRATH!!!" The peanuts perform a gruesome ritual involving pentagrams and suicide. This ritual causes the very ground to split beneath your feet! Fortunately, the White Fairy casts Levitation on you and your friend, Triceps. Since you're levitating, ground-based attacks cannot harm you. How lucky! Deep from the hellish pits of the center of the earth emerge the freshly-exhumed PEANUT GODS. NAME: Nut, Nutters, and Nutella STATS: HP: 100 (Each) MP: 100 (Altogether) Nut and Nutters connect and slowly begin to form a new shell. Take them out quickly! Who knows what'll happen if they transfuse... But wait! Nutella hurls peanuts at you! Oh no! ...Except you're a chair. Good foresight. Now it's your turn once again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Crush Nut with the chair leg! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 Crush Nut with the chair leg! You decide to crush Nut with one of your luminous, freshly-varnished oaken legs. He cracks and separates from Nutters. Good job, but now they're mad as hell! In fact... they've gone NUTS!!! Nut and Nutters decide to bash your luminous oaken legs with their heads, causing you to lose your momentum. While in the meantime, Nutella prepares a Hazelnut Bomb. Triceps notices your pain and heals you. Yay! You feel kinda better, but you're getting beat pretty badly... The White Fairy is hiding in a bush. What on earth could she be planning? Your turn! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Eat a Snickers Bar in front Nutters! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 Eat a Snickers Bar in front Nutters! (You transform back into your original forme, slipping away from the bashing nuttiness of Nut and Nutters.) Suddenly, a crazy idea hits you! Time to eat a Snickers bar! Quickly, you turn your hand into a Snickers bar and start digging in. Damn... that's som sweet-ass nougaty shit right there... You feel awesome, but the PEANUT GODS are now furious at your act of blasphemy! They've gone further than NUTS!!! Nut and Nutters accidentally bash each other's heads, causing them to skip turns. Nutella charges her Hazelnut Bomb even further. Woah... it's getting kinda big. Triceps braces herself. The White Fairy is still inside that nearby bush apparently... Who knows what the hell she's doing in there. Your turn! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie_ Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Go check the bush! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esme Posted February 14, 2013 Author Share Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) Go check the bush! Nut and Nutters are utterly incapacitated and can't do anything. Nutella, on the other hand, is preparing the Hazelnut Bomb! She's a jerk, though, so you just ignore her and float towards the bush. You peek in the bush and see the White Fairy's cute little butt! Ha ha! How precious! ...But wait. She's holding something! It... looks kind of important, but for some reason you can't put your finger on thought. Oh well. While you checked the bush, Triceps found that placing a small barrier around you and the White Fairy would be a good idea. And so she casts the barrier, suppressing whatever kind of damage you may take in the near future. Your turn! Edited February 14, 2013 by Esme Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagfisch Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 Tronsform into a peanut to deceive them for a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.