Dragoncat Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Make them sing with a bucket over their head. The proper way to teach a cat to high five is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLuckyHaiku Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Keep slapping the cat until it finally tries swatting your hand with it’s paw. The proper way to write your autobiography is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 ... make yourself look better than you actually are, make it seem like people fall in love with you at first sight, that you can do everything perfectly, that you are always correct and everyone who disagrees with you is a moron. Or a villain. The proper way to gasp for air is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor_Siegfried Posted July 23, 2019 Share Posted July 23, 2019 The proper way to force your stomach to be hungry again is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted July 23, 2019 Share Posted July 23, 2019 ... just jam in the food. Trust me, it works all the time. Once your gag reflex kicks in, you know you did it right!Disclaimer: Don't actually do that. It's not healthy. The proper way to shock people is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor_Siegfried Posted July 23, 2019 Share Posted July 23, 2019 With electricity. The proper way to strike ones head against a keyboard is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted July 23, 2019 Share Posted July 23, 2019 ... with as much force as possible. Maybe one might achieve the legendary maneuver of "Splitting the Desk with the Forehead of Rock", an ancient Bullshittese martial arts technique developed by the monks of Absurdia and brought to the West by the grand teacher Im-Plaus-Ibal Doesntexistowitz. The proper way to make up words is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwing Posted July 23, 2019 Share Posted July 23, 2019 To combine the first letters you see in alphabet soup. The proper way to unjam a flamethrower is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted July 25, 2019 Share Posted July 25, 2019 Icy Hot/Bengay. The proper way to write a research paper is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwing Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 To forget to create a work cited page and only use .com sites. The proper way to fire a rocket with impossible accuracy in bullet time is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 Play the reverse song of time to slow down everything else. The proper way to go on a wild goose chase is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 Okay, so here's the deal: Go to your local zoo. Go to the elephants there. Seek out the largest male elephant you can find. Bonus points if he's in heat, as elephants, especially male ones, are at their most aggressive when they want to do the horizontal hula. Insult the elephant's pride and make him seethe with anger to the point he starts chasing you. Lure him to the nearest goose farm and have him rampage through it. This is the important part, so listen carefully: The geese will panic and fly away, while the now-calmed elephant will be brought back to the zoo. Now, seek out the escaped geese. As you have no leads where they went, you'll have to search everywhere. Because geese are intelligent, they KNOW it was you who sicced the elephant on their asses, so they'll try to run away from you, which forces you to chase them wildly. ???? Profit... Maybe? The proper way to get rid of evidence that you've angered an elephant and had him destroy half a city for a demonstration on wild goose chases is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 3 hours ago, DragonFlames said: Bonus points if he's in heat It's called rut for males, and for elephants in particular, musth. Destroy evidence by faking your own death. The proper way to determine the gender/sex of an alien from Area 51 is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 ... put it in a room with a man and a woman and see who it approaches first. 21 hours ago, Dragoncat said: It's called rut for males, and for elephants in particular, musth. Ah, I didn't know that! Thanks! The proper way to spoil something for everyone is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Roger The Paladin Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 To tell them Rhea is actually Byleth's daughter from the future, which is why they are the only character who can S-rank. What a twist. Â Spoiler The real spoiler is I made that up. The proper way to be a Camus is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 ... to be stupid as hell and value loyalty above standard morals and/or common sense, then pass that off as the noble thing to do. Which it isn't. It's one of the dumbest things any human being could possibly do. The proper way to make something useless into something useful is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor_Siegfried Posted August 10, 2019 Share Posted August 10, 2019 Make it ful so that it has usefulness. The proper way to yank off every strand of hair on top of your head with one pull is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFlames Posted August 10, 2019 Share Posted August 10, 2019 ... to have really big hands. Or be wearing a wig. The proper way to create salt is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwing Posted August 11, 2019 Share Posted August 11, 2019 To conquer every saltwater location in the world and wait for nature to do its thing. The proper way to make an awesome handshake is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted August 11, 2019 Share Posted August 11, 2019 Drink tons of caffeinated drinks past 8 pm because the most awesome ideas come when you can't sleep. The proper way to look good in apple bottom jeans without boots with the fur is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwing Posted December 6, 2019 Share Posted December 6, 2019 To wear nothing but apple bottom jeans and furless boots. Or turn into a werewolf if you want fur but no boots. The proper way to watch a VHS without a VCR is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted December 6, 2019 Share Posted December 6, 2019 With a potato. The proper way to record a fight is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emperor_Siegfried Posted December 12, 2019 Share Posted December 12, 2019 With a set of 8K cameras catching every angle and bloody detail as it progresses. Then go through editting to add slowmo or extra blood if you feel like it would make it more exciting. The proper way to unlock your disk is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawkwing Posted April 24, 2020 Share Posted April 24, 2020 With a lockpick. Or a shotgun. The proper way to react to a wild animal doing something hilarious in your backyard is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragoncat Posted April 24, 2020 Share Posted April 24, 2020 Go out in your backyard and join it. The proper way to sing the national anthem is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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