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The FE Nonsense Story Thread - Now in Act V!


Stephen the Great
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How do you like the Nonsense Story?  

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...glass of water. He rolls down a cliff and hits a steel rock, but he was so tanky he did not get a single scrath on his body of armour. As he was walking away, a summoner summons him in Fire Emblem Heroes. There he meets...

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...steal a time machine, to prevent her sons death. In the middle of the theft, however, she was murdered by Deen, as he was hired by David Xanatos to...

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...systematically Exeggcute all the lolis in the FE universe. He succeeds in slaying Nowi, Elise, and a few others. Sakura was spared because she kinda didn't look like a loli. Meanwhile, Jaffar learns some elder magic from Niime and becomes a Sorceror, and somehow obtains a lava lamp with a genie inside. Meanwhile, Sain the Paladdin...

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...a horde of Risen were assaulting Eliwood's castle, and they were led by Forneus, who kinda looked like a Risen now but with a big brain and piloting a giant mecha. Inside the castle, Eliwood, Ninian, Roy, Lyn, Nils, Hector, Lilina, and Donnel were planning a defense with special plant seeds. Renault bursts in...

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... @Sigismund of Luxemburg, who ended this act fully 180 posts before the planned time. DAMN YOU MASTER TYPO!!!!!

ACT II ENDS

ACT III BEGINS

There was a nationalist movement in Grannvale; the leader was...

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...Sigurd, who was tired of being barbecued all the time by Arvis. He was aided by Deirdre, Seliph, Julia, and the Pheraean royal family, who survived the Risen invasion. Arvis was chilling in his palace when he saw Sigurd and his buddies using a battering ram to break down the door. However, they were attacked by...

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...tossed out a purple rulebook labelled "Da Rules". The heroes read it, and there was actually no section on door key requirement. They threw Anna away and hired Julian to pick the lock. They succeeded and found a candelabra, a clock, a teapot, and a teacup inside the castle. Suddenly...

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...summoned the students of Hogwarts, who were all perfectly willing to help their former headmaster. To counter this, Seliph attempts to summon the entirety of Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter, but only ends up summoning Percy, Leo, and Clarisse (the FE ones). Shigure arrives onto the scene, and he summons the Daedric Prince Azura. Oddly enough...

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...battle against Mickey Mouse, who had gathered the Infinity Gauntlet of IPs, having collected Marvel, Lucasfilm, and Fox. The three IPs left standing were Universal, Time Warner, and the entire videogame industry. So after thoroughly incinerating the Undertale characters, the rest of the video game characters join the battle against Mickey. But they were interrupted by...

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... Abraham Lincoln, who reminded them that Mickey was in a couple of video games, and told everyone that they were no different from each other and they should get along. The video game army considered this, then...

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