Death'

WAIT A SEC IS THAT A SIGH REFERENCE.

I sincerely hope you're joking like the rest of them.

kawaii kawaii, I'm very selfless, here take this milkshake and other food that I cooked for you! *flashes kawaii boobs!!!* Here, check out my FE10 low turn count playthrough while I do nothing. Except I don't really want you to be my boyfriend because friendzone is the best, kawaii! gaiz. I think this is gonna work.

Hm, why exactly is sex an invalid answer? wow i can't read. Anyway, besides that, cuddling is also very awesome. ^_^ and I guess maybe it makes you feel special since boyfriends/girlfriends tend to be more willing to do stuff for each other and try to be on their best behaviour and it all results in everything being really pleasant and cute and nice. I kinda get your point if you mean 'best friends', since boyfriend is basically the same thing but sex. I'm not sure if a large group of friends could ever possibly feel like the same thing for me though lol.

you mean your advice on how awesome being friendzoned is? no thankyou.

what if i was a kawaii whore?

no one likes guys with short haircuts.

semi-serious question. I wanna be the very best girlfriend. :3 like no one ever was. priority advice taken from nerdy metalhead guys. Alternatively you can discuss philosophy.

wow guys. wow. yeah you are so much kinder and more selfless than everyone else, your tl;dr posts are pure evidence that you are a fantastic, thoughtful human being and a true role model. Anyway as to how to get a girlfriend, compliment her butt. And like the other guy who suggested, take her to IHOP!

but seriously I don't really exist. Neither does anyone on the interwebs. It's only you. You and your computer screen.

bonus if you actually blast warm diarrhea on my face oh bby ;)))))

we r speshul

internet friendships are not real.

Okay, Helios and Sophia make a good point. you are a human being and here's some honest advice. I think the problem is you have to be spontaneous and unique to stand out from other guys and attract girls. For example you could set up speakers in her home to play romantic songs such as "Warm Diarrhea Blasts on my Face" by Vomit Erection

ew but cooties...???????

weigh her down with giant rocks in the ocean.

I think I'm pretty much automatically interested in being friends with anyone who loves similar music and/or animals. Also people who think for themselves. i.e. This homeless-looking old guy on the bus once complimented my Swans shirt and actually knew who they were. I had this intense conversation with him (i'm usually really shy) and was actually kinda sad when he had to leave. :< lol. As for boyfriends I like it when they are cuddly and I feel like they genuinely like me back and long hair and I think that is about it. :3

lolol xD "anyone ever tell you I have beautiful eyes?" tbh I never watched johnny bravo as a kid because he freaked me out.