Charpig

Cain: They're a lot better now. I'm as fine as can be! *Falls off horse* Serra, if both Matthew and Erk were wounded badly and you could only save one of them with your heal staff, who would you save?

You get first place in Mario Kart. But just as you are about to cross the finish line, a blue shell hits you, causing you to finish fourth..... *inserts a 9mm pistol*

Sety: I already can! Now, watch as I summon Bahamut, Hallowed Father of the Eidolons! Rydia: What do you think you're doing? Sety: Oh, sorry, Rydia.....I just wanted to show off to my friends. Marth, what do YOU think of Marth x Roy fangirls?

Granted, but then you can't do anything fun for a month. I wish the AI in Mario Kart Wii wasn't so cheap.

Weapon for me first, if I were infected I would end up killing my family anyway. Would you rather be Mario or Luigi?

Granted, then everyone dies due to the global warming. I wish a Cecil x Rydia pairing were possible in Final Fantasy IV.

You get whipped. WHAPAH! *inserts Lloyd Irving's twin swords*

Bring on the rain. At least I can get an umbrella for that, but there's nothing I can do about the sun. Would you rather have a duel against Eirika or Eliwood?

Granted, but you have to move since the city you live in won't allow you to keep Yaks as pets. I wish Fire Emblem had "Game Over Yeah" like Sega Championship Rally.

Tinny: Sure, I'll.....Oh God! LEG CRAMP!!!!! Wendy, if I pinch your pennies, will they pinch back?

I pity the fool who just inserted Mr. T. He could have helped you save money by dialing 1-800-COLLECT. *inserts Sazh Katzroy*

Sety: Whoa, hey now, Tinny isn't leaving you for me. I think she's going with Aless. It seems she was traumatized by the last time you sawed her in half..... Nolan, have you ever tried performing a roundhouse kick?

Granted, that day comes after they have stolen Tinny. I wish that Edward would actually dodge attacks rather than blocking them with his face.

Tinny: I've always wanted to try using magic bullets. By the way, Boyd isn't a girl stealer. He's supposed to be with Mist. Sanaki, if both Sigrun and Tanith were in danger of being killed but only one of them could be saved, which one would you save?

I'll take the moldy cereal, I think that would have less of a chance of adverse effects. Would you rather have a unit that has great offense but crap defense, or a unit that has crap offense but great defense?

Tinny: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit you that hard.....I just don't like being touched there. Ike, how do you feel about Boyd becoming your brother in law?

You get her as your Heavenly Bride. *inserts a Short Axe*

Aless: Because you're paranoid. Faval: Yes, archers and pegasus knights don't work well together. Tibarn, I relayed your message to Captain Falcon. He wants to challenge you to a fight with no items at Final Destination. Will you accept his challenge?

Bad hair day, easily. Every day for me is a bad hair day, to be honest. Being depressed would actually affect my performance, a bad hair day would not. Would you rather have a team of only pegasus knights or a team of only wyvern riders?

Tinny: It's kind of cool. By the way, have you noticed that I'm wearing the maid outfit you got for me? Shinon, having fought with Ike for so long, is your opinion of him any higher now?

Granted, you're a success! But Tinny is an utter failure, and that makes her less attractive to you. I wish killing weapons would land criticals when I really need them to.

You get Est wearing the maid outfit instead. *inserts Shinon with 1 HP left*

Go back in time. At least I could make some progress and correct some of my earlier mistakes. Would you rather be under the command of Jarod or Ludveck?

Granted, but you can never be with Katua again. I wish that someone would put Haruhi Suzumiya in her place. (And please don't answer "But she destroys the world instead." Think of something more creative.)

Goht. Would you rather have to pet a Skulltula or hug a ReDead?