Silith Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 I read the first 100 in one go. good stuff :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted November 13, 2009 Author Share Posted November 13, 2009 Wow, I just noticed someone tried to make a booper topic here like 9 months before I joined. I was even referenced in it. Weird. In other news Ashera: Blargh I am dead. Ike: Bitching. Micaiah: Hey we won! Ike: Yeah, totally. Who are you? Micaiah: I'm Micaiah! Ike: I bet you are. Micaiah: I lead the Dawn Brigade! Ike: Hey that's super. What are they, like my fan club or something? Micaiah: We helped you fight Ashera! Ike: Yeah,without you cheering me on I couldn't have etc... Micaiah: I was right there! Fighting! Ike: Hey where's your mom at? Think she's grateful too? Micaiah: My parents are dead. Ike: Sorry to hear that, have an autograph, kid. Micaiah: I've been travelling with Sothe. Sothe: Hey there, Ike, been a while! Ike: ...Nope, don't remember him. Sothe: Oh God! *runs off crying* Micaiah: Oh he is going to be such a whiny bitch tonight... Thanks a lot, Ike. Ike: Don't mention it. I'm gonna go talk to the grown-ups now. Hey Soren! Did you see how I totally killed a God? Soren: And I helped! Ike: You sure did, little guy. We have to take you on a trip. Soren: Really? Ike: Sure, anywhere you want to go, sport. Soren: Yay! Micaiah: Wow, it's like the whole first part of the game was unnecessary... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted November 26, 2009 Author Share Posted November 26, 2009 Gatrie: I think I'm in love. Shinon: No you aren't. Gatrie: No, I really am! Shinon: I doubt it. Gatrie: I met this girl, and we really hit it off. Shinon: No you didn't. Gatrie: She didn't hit me, or run away, or call her husband or anything! Shinon: I hate you, die. Gatrie: That sounds like best man talk! I'm gonna go get a ring! *Gatrie leaves* Shinon: Rolf! Rolf: Yes, uncle Shinon? Shinon: Go take the skirt off the tree, this isn't as funny as I thought it would be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CT075 Posted November 26, 2009 Share Posted November 26, 2009 Gatrie: I think I'm in love. Shinon: No you aren't. Gatrie: No, I really am! Shinon: I doubt it. Gatrie: I met this girl, and we really hit it off. Shinon: No you didn't. Gatrie: She didn't hit me, or run away, or call her husband or anything! Shinon: I hate you, die. Gatrie: That sounds like best man talk! I'm gonna go get a ring! *Gatrie leaves* Shinon: Rolf! Rolf: Yes, uncle Shinon? Shinon: Go take the skirt off the tree, this isn't as funny as I thought it would be. lol. You really should make more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted November 29, 2009 Author Share Posted November 29, 2009 Ike: Wait, I don't understand. Reyson It's all pretty simple. Ike: Run it by me again. Reyson: Well, this is my brother Rafaiel, who- Ike: Waitwaitwait. I thought you and Leanne were the last herons apart from your vegetable father. Reyson: Well, so did I, but he came with the Wolf queen. Ike: Wait, I didn't know there were wolf laguz. Reyson: Nor did anyone else, they live across the desert. Anyways, so they came and fought for Daein. Ike: Wait, I thought Daeins hated laguz. Reyson: Not anymore, I guess. Anyways, so they helped Daien, who were fighting because Begnion was frocing them to. Ike: Wait, I thought Begnion was helping us. Reyson: eah, but the senator's are evil, and anyways, Kilvas and Daein are under this blood contract, which if broken, kills citizens from their country. Ike: ...Okay this officially got too ridiculous, I'm gonna take up Marth's offer to join in some Brawl thing. If anyone asks, I left for some far away continent. I'm not coming back. Reyson: I didn't even tell you the Goddess of chaos is that white haired girl's bird! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candlejack Posted November 29, 2009 Share Posted November 29, 2009 What do you call Haar with a boner? A Haard On :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted November 30, 2009 Author Share Posted November 30, 2009 (edited) Haar-don? Edit: Just noticed the spoiler tag. Yep... Edited November 30, 2009 by mr_e_s Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Hawk Posted November 30, 2009 Share Posted November 30, 2009 YES! It's nice to see this topic alive and well. Just got back to this forum 'cause I’m taking a quick break from Modern Warfare 2, and I happened to find this topic again. I thought it was gone forever in the great purge, but it’s here now and...the world is suddenly right again. Or something like that. And now I guess I should really post something here. So yeah. The Hawk's Super Amazing Guide of Win Anna: Hello, and welcome to the tutorial section of Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn! First off, build an SCV from your Command Center and-- The Hawk: That would be the tutorial for "Starcraft". Anna: Oh right, sorry. Press A to use normal attacks, press B to use Artes-- The Hawk: "Tales of" series. Anna: ...Press X to not die? The Hawk: That's not even a game! Anna: Oh, here we go! First off, select your unit. See the menu that popped up? We’re going to cover every single one of these options here in great detail-- The Hawk: Yeah, no. I’ll just run through the basics real quick here. See your blue guys here? Move them near the red guys and attack the crap out of them until somebody dies. You can figure out the rest of the details on your own. Anna: O...kay, well then what are we supposed to do now? The Hawk: Let’s rate characters! Anna: But that’s not really a tutorial is it? The Hawk: Don’t care, we’re going for it. Anna: Alright then, I guess we’ll start at the beginning. First we have the main character, Micaiah! Micaiah: Hello everyone. The Hawk: *cough*Failcaiah*cough* Micaiah: ... Anna: I wouldn’t be so sure about that, if you train her she can become a really good mage! The Hawk: Wrong. She can become a pretty good HEALER, big difference. Micaiah: What about Thani? The Hawk: Having a nice Light spell doesn’t necessarily make you good. Anna: Actually, Thani can really come in handy for-- The Hawk: Next character!! Anna: All right, next up we have Edward. Edward: Hi! The Hawk: He takes axes to the FACE and doesn’t afraid of anything! Anna: Internet memes aside, Edward starts off kinda weak but can become a great dodger and a competent swordsman-- The Hawk: On Easy Mode. Anna: Could you stop that? The Hawk: Sorry, shutting up now. Anna: Next we have Leonardo, the Dawn Brigade’s official Archer. Leonardo: Glad to be here. The Hawk: He’s only the official Archer because the Dawn Brigade couldn’t get someone like Shinon or Rolf. Leonardo: You’ll never be half as funny as Mr. ES. *leaves* The Hawk: ... Anna: Are you feeling alright? The Hawk: Must not cry...big boys don’t cry... Anna: Let’s move onto the next character, shall we? The Hawk (in the distance): MY WORLD IS SO GREY AND DESTROYED!!! Anna: Better yet, let’s take a quick break! That's all I got for now. Feel free to cast merciless judgment on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candlejack Posted November 30, 2009 Share Posted November 30, 2009 Needs more "Edward can tank without any pants". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted December 10, 2009 Author Share Posted December 10, 2009 I just realized I did in fact have something resembling a booper topic going. I keep forgetting this. Now, less talky more...talky except not as me. Brom: Aww, shucks. I can't believe I'm in prison again. Kieran: Again? What did you do? Brom: Let's just say a man's love for his cattle is unfairly restricted in this country. Kieran: Gross. Brom: Do you think they're going to torture us in here? Kieran: Oh, for sure. They'll probably hang us upside down and whip us senseless. Brom: Oh, that doesn't sound too- Kieran: Then they pull off our fingernails, one by one, with rusty tongs. Brom: I don't think I could ever withsta- Kieran: Then they'll keep us underwater to the point of almost drowning, and bring us up for a quick breath just in time to be submerged again. Probably for hours. Brom: Oh Ashera there's no way I cou- Kieran: Then attach electrodes to our privates and light us up like a royal ball. Or...Royal balls. Brom: Just stop! Kieran: Then if we're really lucky they'll tie us down and let some rats onto our stomach, letting them decide whether they want the fresh organs of the middle or the nice moist eyeballs. Or perhaps the tongue. Oh, yes... Brom: You're really getting off on this, huh? Kieran: Pinch my nipples. Brom: ...I miss my cow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted December 11, 2009 Share Posted December 11, 2009 I just realized I did in fact have something resembling a booper topic going. I keep forgetting this. Now, less talky more...talky except not as me. Brom: Aww, shucks. I can't believe I'm in prison again. Kieran: Again? What did you do? Brom: Let's just say a man's love for his cattle is unfairly restricted in this country. Kieran: Gross. Brom: Do you think they're going to torture us in here? Kieran: Oh, for sure. They'll probably hang us upside down and whip us senseless. Brom: Oh, that doesn't sound too- Kieran: Then they pull off our fingernails, one by one, with rusty tongs. Brom: I don't think I could ever withsta- Kieran: Then they'll keep us underwater to the point of almost drowning, and bring us up for a quick breath just in time to be submerged again. Probably for hours. Brom: Oh Ashera there's no way I cou- Kieran: Then attach electrodes to our privates and light us up like a royal ball. Or...Royal balls. Brom: Just stop! Kieran: Then if we're really lucky they'll tie us down and let some rats onto our stomach, letting them decide whether they want the fresh organs of the middle or the nice moist eyeballs. Or perhaps the tongue. Oh, yes... Brom: You're really getting off on this, huh? Kieran: Pinch my nipples. Brom: ...I miss my cow. XD That's really funny. Keep it up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted December 11, 2009 Author Share Posted December 11, 2009 Kk, will do. Also if anyone has requests for chars, that would be nice, cause in general I just write down two names and go from there. Tanith: You! Boyd: Me? What about me? Tanith: I've received 19 official complaints from my pegasus knightsthat a green haired lout was hitting on them and complaining about his brothers a lot. I asked Oscar about it and he said you were the most likely candidate. Boyd: What makes you think it was me? It was probably one of my pest brothers! Tanith: You have green hair and you just complained about your brothers right now. And only you would be stupid enough to try some of those pickup lines on women carrying weapons. Boyd: So what's the penalty for hitting on pegasus knights? Tanith: A 50 gold fine. Boyd: Oh, well in that case, yeah it was me, nice jugs, by the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted December 20, 2009 Author Share Posted December 20, 2009 Nasir: So I left because we have a black king. Ike: Wait, what are you sayi- Nasir: White power! Also, longer. Pelleas' childhood Pelleas: Dad,I made a painting for you! Ashnard: Who left this thing around? Come on people, pick up after yourselves! Pelleas: Dad...it's me. Ashnard: Oh right...Pelleas, huh? Pelleas: Yeah! And I made this for you! Ashnard: Hey that's great, go spend a week in the box of pain, little guy. Pelleas: What? why? Ashnard: The red isn't blood, you are not my son! *much later* Micaiah: So you're Ashnard's son? Pelleas: Yeah... but I never met him or anything. Micaiah: That's cool, I gu- Pelleas: EVER! Micaiah: Oh man. Daddy issues. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK-201 Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 =D Just one question, isn't Soren Ashnard's son? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted December 25, 2009 Author Share Posted December 25, 2009 Spoiler alert? Also, Pelleas still thinks he is. Amy: Mr. Soren! Soren: Oh...little girl. Amy: Let's have a tea party! Soren: I'm very busy. Amy: Tea party! Soren: No. Amy: TEA PARTY! Soren: Look, everyone's been turned to stone and there's a goddess out to destroy us! I'm not stopping for a stupid tea party! Amy: You look, Mr. Soren. I'm a little girl, and here I am, after everyone's been turned to stone. Tere are only two explanations. One, I'm just incredibly lucky where everyone else isn't. Two, I'm so insanely powerful that Ashera couldn't turn me into stone despite the fact that I'm a little girl. Soren: ... *later* Amy: Yay! Tea party! Ike: She got you too, huh? Soren: Yep. Kieran: Truly she is a fierce opponent, but I'm pretty sure I could best her. Amy: Mr. Kieran, you're not wearing your party hat! Kieran: My apologies, madam! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 I got some kind of email from here today, sparked my memory. Umm.... Booper? Danved: Hey guys, what's going on here? Geoffrey: Oh damnit, who invited Danved? Kieran: I learned my lesson last time, sir! Makalov: Are you kidding? That guy's even creepier then me. Lucia: Not even if it made me a useful character. Astrid: Just cause I'm dating Makalov doesn't mean I'd stoop <i>that</i> low. Calil: That guy scares the crap outof me, and I cut off Largo's arm. Marcia: Crackers, crackers! (Pfft, no way) Elincia: I don't recall inviting any of you here. Bastian: Truly his hair is reminiscent of an evil clown, and his love for children is well past the border of unsavoury. Also he smells funny. Brom: Wait, who's Danved? He kind of reminds me of that Devdan feller. You think they know each other or something? Nephenee: Tormod told me stories about that one... Shinon: I'm not even in this part of the game, I just dropped by to say I hate that guy. Also all of you, but especially him. Nealuchi: In all my years I've never seen such a monster. Leanne: I learned English to better express my disgust for him. Largo: Danved! You old dog! What took you so long? Geoffrey: Damnit! Who invited Largo? Kieran: I learned my lesson last time, sir! Etc... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 * mr_e_s hey, can you be a doll and toss out two FE10 chars for me? * mr_e_s Is that a no? * mr_e_s I get it, I don't warrant conversation * 3:35 AM * EmeraldFox jhggj * EmeraldFox Marcia and Serra * mr_e_s only one of those is FE10, but k Marcia: Oh crackers, I'm almost out. I better go pick up some more. *elsewhere* Serra: Oh no! That was the last of it? I need more! *at the conveniently placed Supermarket they can somehow both go to shut up it works* Marcia: There it is! Serra: The last one! *pointed glaring* Marcia: Oh, did you want that? Serra: Well, you were looking at it first... Marcia: Yeah, good point, I'll take it. Serra: Bitch please! I had my eye on that thing before you even knew what aisle to check. Marcia: Cat fight? Serra: Cat fight. *10 grueling minutes later, after much hair pulling, pinching, and inexplicably a ready made tub of Jello...* Marcia: There we go! If you know what's best for you, you'll stay down, dumpling! Oh... Oh wait, this is Pink dye #35, I'm #37. My bad. Serra: It happens. Bleh, crossovers are less appealing to write. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 # EmeraldFox Serra and Ilyana # mr_e_s kk Ilyana: So...hungry. Serra: So...CUTE! You're just the most adorable little thing ever! Ilyana: Oh...hi. Serra: Aren't you just the cutest little thing? Like a lost puppy! Or Erk in makeup! Ilyana: I'm...Can I have some food? Serra: What do I look like, a soup kitchen? Ilyana: You look more like...cotton candy. Serra: Is that a crack at my hair? Ilyana: I like cotton candy... Serra: Wow is that ever a creepy look you're giving me. *later* Matthew: You know, I haven't seen Serra since we came across that light haired mage. Erk: Good, maybe she'll stop dressing me in makeup. Matthew: I thought you loved wearing makeup. Erk: But the stuff she makes me wear is so tacky! I have a little class, thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 # EmeraldFox Serra and Tanith, go go go. # April Iono # mr_e_s you're a big fan of Serra, huh? Serra: And then this icky paladin kept hitting on me while Erk was all paying attention to this skank Priscilla, and Matthew, who is this kind of cute thief that totally has a thing for me, was doing that thing where he pretends he wished I wasn't around. He loves to play hard to get, well anyways, this icky paladin was all- Tanith: I can't even begin to explain how much I don't care. Just because I got stuck babysitting you doesn't mean we're best friends. Serra: Right, so anyways Sain, he's the icky paladin, was all trying to compare my beauty to a bunch of flowers or something, which I don't get, cause somepeople are allergic to flowers, is he saying I make people sneeze? So when I asked him he got all flustery and had to go check on something or other, I stopped listening when he stopped talking about me. Tanith: Please. Shut up. Or go. Leaving would be fine. Serra: But then I found Erk reading or writing or something. You know, something book-y. He's always doing something book-y. He had on this really cute little pouty face when he saw me sit down, too. and he was all "I'm trying to study I'ma big fuddy duddy." And then I called him a fudy duddy and he got all mad and walked off. With his book. Tanith: You are the most self centred person I've ever met, and I hate you. Serra: Pfft. You're just jealous cause I'm way prettier than you, and I have all these guys after me, and you probably don't have any. Tanith: Just because you think everyone likes you, doesn't mean anyone actually likes you. Serra: ...Are you coming on to me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 * 4:05 AM * EmeraldFox Serra and Oscar * mr_e_s nah, it's past 4am, and it's my birthday, I should probably be awake for some of it * mr_e_s I'm off * EmeraldFox ._. * EmeraldFox Fine. * mr_e_s ...damnit * mr_e_s alright, last one * EmeraldFox * EmeraldFox Ew * EmeraldFox =3 Serra: Wow, these Tellius guys have been real mean to me. That one girl beat me up for hair dye, the other one ate me (I'm fine now though), and the butch one totally came on to me! There is nothing worthwhile here at all! I want to go home! Oscar: Oh, what's the problem here? Serra: I just... Everyone is so mean here! And I didn't do anything to any of them! Oscar: Hmmm, well that's not very good. I just finished making dinner, did you want to have some with me? Serra: ...What's the catch? Oscar: Well, you'll have to keep me company, and maybe tell me some stories about where you're from. Serra: ...Really? You want me to tell you some stories? Oscar: I don't see why not. Serra; Great! So there's this mage Erk, he's really dreamy, but so broody! He gets big pouty faces like this. *poor imitation* And he totally likes me but he can't admit it because he has like a mages vow or a chastity until marriage thing or something, I dunno, anyways there's this other guy Matthew wh's a jerk but cute too, and he thinks I'm really great, but he's one of those guys who always says mean things to people he likes, you know, so these two are pretty much fighting over me. They're always arguing over who gets to take me where. I mean, they're usually saying the other one has to do it, but it's cause they're really nice guys, you know? So anyways these two... *Serra trails off as she enters the tent with Oscar still standing outside* Oscar: ...Well, she's still better conversation then Kieran. AND EVERYONE LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rewjeo Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I actually lolled. And I very rarely actually lol. I usually just think that it's funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fenrir Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I actually lolled. And I very rarely actually lol. I usually just think that it's funny. you'd be crazy if you didn't lol. i liked the one where ike was like mia whats the probelm? HERPES. lmao Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esaka Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 *stops lurking for once* This topic wins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr_e_s Posted June 22, 2010 Author Share Posted June 22, 2010 Right, boopers. They're a thing. 3 liners are a go, I guess. Nephenee: Hey there, Calil, what's going o- Calil: Keep walking, bedwetter. Nephenee: Stop reading my diary! Boyd: So the moral of the story is, never trust a hooker with your wallet! Rolf: I thought the moral was hubris often leads to trage- Boyd: NEEEEERD! Gatrie: Oh man, I got so drunk last night, but at least I got some. High five! Shinon: I thought you left with Devdan. Gatrie: ...What's your point? Tormod: You're forgetting why we started this group, Muarim! Muarim: For the rights of the laguz? Tormod: No! To show off our awesome short shorts! Levail: So, I have to fight all the laguz royals, and a bunch of the best trained soldiers in the world, who are you fighting? Zelgius: That guy over there, the one in the headband. I don't really have a chance though. Levail: ...I really backed the wrong horse, didn't I? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fenrir Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 lol@ levail one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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