Dealing with unhappiness.

[Celice]

I've been mulling over it, and I brought a roommate into the discussion today too, but, there's not enough voice for something so dependent on the self.

What are your takes on unhappiness? Dealing with it, living with it, why you become unhappy. You have free reign. I wouldn't even give this much, but not many people know how to start a conversation--only follow a lead.

[Fenrir]

Are you yourself dealing with depression?

sometimes its caused over realising the futility of life.(at least for me)

[Crystal Shards]

Life is only futile if you believe it to be so.

I have a pretty practical view of unhappiness. Basically, shit happens. How do I deal with it? Well I ask myself a couple questions. Is it out of my control? If so, why worry about it? Is there something I can do about it? If so, then I do it. I'd say that solves 99.9% of my problems.

[Ansem]

I find it effective to stay alone and think about things. When i am really broken, i head to the park and swing while listening to music. Sooner or later i forget what made me so upset. Then after a hour or so, i go emo. *Sigh*

[Phoenix Wright]

Sometimes I feel depressed but it goes away quickly (a day or two). Most of my problems have to do with lost loved ones, which I feel extremely sad about sometimes. Usually when I'm feeling "blue" it's because of a low self-esteem.

[Fenrir]

I find it effective to stay alone and think about things. When i am really broken, i head to the park and swing while listening to music. Sooner or later i forget what made me so upset. Then after a hour or so, i go emo. *Sigh*

yes, just find some good music, that is nice.

going emo is :(

[volkethereaper]

Dealing with depression is pretty difficult in any form, but if you have "chronic" depression it becomes even harder. With depression it's difficult to deal with your problems in a practical or logical manner because the problem is often inherintly illogical, and there aren't many practical approaches that make much of a difference. If this is the sort of problem you're having the best that I can recomend is trying to do things that still release a few endorphines and be patient. Every low period ends at some point. You just have to make it through the dark times with as much light as you can muster. It won't be enough, but it will have to do.

[quanta]

A lot of the times I remember being unhappy it's because I felt like I wasn't accomplishing enough. Generally, this was fixed by finding something to attempt and do, although sometimes I would have to wait quite a while for such a chance.

The other times I remember being unhappy were probably somebody dying or something similar. For those, I basically just wait. There's nothing wrong with being sad about this sort of thing for a while as long as it doesn't interfere too much with the rest of your life or last too long.

[Strawman]

I get depressed being around my friends and when listening to music.

I find it best to listen to music(still), lie down, think, then take a nap.

[Fenrir]

I get depressed being around my friends and when listening to music.

I find it best to listen to music(still), lie down, think, then take a nap.

if you get depressed around someone, they are most likely not your friends.

also, u get depressed listening to music and get un-depressed listening to music...?w?t?f?

[Emeraldfox]

If I ever get down in the dumps, I'll just listen to one of my favorite themes from various games, or look at funny comics, or play a few games.

[Fayt Zelpher]

Well, I've always found that listening to some uplifting music can usually help with unhappiness and listening to heavy metal/screamo/etc. only makes me angry/more unhappy.

Also, time heals all wounds, or so they say.

[Fenrir]

If I ever get down in the dumps, I'll just listen to one of my favorite themes from various games, or look at funny comics, or play a few games.

SNL is awesome as well.(remembered this cause of the funny comments statement)

Well, I've always found that listening to some uplifting music can usually help with unhappiness and listening to heavy metal/screamo/etc. only makes me angry/more unhappy.

Also, time heals all wounds, or so they say.

metal can help, even if it tends to make u angry unless you get really angry you'll be over it in a couple hours. time does heal all wounds, but it cannot heal grudges.

[volkethereaper]

A very important reason to avoid them, if at all possible.;)

[Strawman]

if you get depressed around someone, they are most likely not your friends.

also, u get depressed listening to music and get un-depressed listening to music...?w?t?f?

No, they don't make me depressed, I just get depressed around them.

Also, yes. When I listen to music I think. And thinking usually ends up making me sad. But, eventually if I keep listening to music and thinking about things I will get tired and fall asleep. Then, when I wake up, I will be fine.

[Fenrir]

No, they don't make me depressed, I just get depressed around them.

Also, yes. When I listen to music I think. And thinking usually ends up making me sad. But, eventually if I keep listening to music and thinking about things I will get tired and fall asleep. Then, when I wake up, I will be fine.

could you expand, maybe im just missing the point.

thats intresting.

[Ragnell]

I get depressed 90% of the time I play tennis, and yet I play practically every day. Seriously, it's like golf; you always hate yourself when you're finished. I think there's something wrong with me. <_<

Other than that, I get depressed when I feel like I'm not succeeding at something and people are counting on me. I'm normally really quiet and laid-back, but I can get really competitive sometimes, and I go a little nuts if I can't live up to my responsibility. To fix it, I either solve the problem (if possible), or I sit back and think about how much better my life is than 99% of the rest of the world. Seriously, what do I have to be sad about? It's hard to be sad when you know how lucky you are.

[Kay]

I rarely get depressed. I've just learned to not bother with sadness that much. It's not that I don't care that bad things happen, but that I accept it.

The way I see it, everyone does as much as they are able to do, all the time, whether they are limited purely by outside influences, or just don't have the inner strength to be better people. If someone is lazy or greedy, for example, it's only because they lack the strength to be more disciplined and altruistic. And everything not caused or exacerbated by humans is caused by nature or random chance.

So, it would generally be useless for me to be sad about most things. Simply accepting the world as it is makes more sense.

Edited July 31, 2010 by SilentShaman

[Defeatist Elitist]

I just don't really get upset. I guess I can become sad or melancholic, but generally even that is in a happy way. I mean, when it happens I generally enjoy it, it's not a bad thing. It's a positive kind of sadness I guess. I certainly don't become angry.

The thing is though, I don't really know why. I guess I just like existing enough that it can cancel out any negatives out there.

[Celice]

If one were to have an unhappiness, and know a way to making it disappear, would you take the opportunity to do so--assuming you really do know the exact way of causing the unhappiness to change.

I like where you guys are going so far.

[volkethereaper]

That's a difficult question. I think everyone needs unhappiness, it gives one perspective. Nevertheless, enough unhappiness begins to dull a person, and that should be avoided. So, I guess what I'm saying is yes, I would if I could.

[Crystal Shards]

The ability to make an instance of unhappiness go away... we already have that, and likely use it on a daily basis. Overall unhappiness is less controllable. Not every source of unhappiness comes from within, and it's not necessarily dependent on a person's inner strength.

[Ragnell]

If one were to have an unhappiness, and know a way to making it disappear, would you take the opportunity to do so--assuming you really do know the exact way of causing the unhappiness to change.

I like where you guys are going so far.

Define 'have an unhappiness'. Do you mean you have the emotion of unhappiness, or that something is causing you to be unhappy? Because my answer would be different for both.

When I have the emotion of true unhappiness (which I don't think happens very often), I find that I typically want to stay unhappy during the moment. Kind of a 'misery loves company' thing with myself. But when I consider how fortunate I am to have the great life that I have, I feel guilty for even contemplating staying angry/sad. What right do I really have to be unhappy when people are starving across the world? I always try to get rid of the emotion when I'm thinking clearly.

However I wouldn't necessarily want to get rid of a trial or test that makes me unhappy. For example, studying for final exams makes me (and pretty much everyone on earth) unhappy, but I would never abandon studying to make myself happy.

I guess what I mean is that you can't necessarily always change the cause of unhappiness, but you can change your outlook on it, and thus can always make yourself happy anyway.

[eclipse]

I had a bout of depression, which I found was due to an undiagnosed food allergy.

Depending on how bad it was, I'd either find somewhere to cry, or do something physical, like running. Whenever I wore myself out physically, I was too tired to dwell on whatever made me feel unhappy (which was usually stuff out of my control to begin with).

[Freohr Datia]

If I cut my heart out so that I didn't have to worry about love I'd probably feel much better. That seems to be the greatest part of my life that makes me a great deal upset. =/

And for what Ragnell just said about 'misery loves company', for some reason I feel the same way but I really think it should not be that way, like that's the bad way to react, but I can't really help myself. It's just how I am.

Since it mostly comes to love/crush, whatever you want to call it for someone my age, as my reason for being upset, that makes me not like how I feel upset, because it makes me feel selfish. I keep thinking if he wants someone else I should not feel upset about it and be fine that he's found someone/will want someone else besides me. I try to convince myself that I will find someone else eventually, but I have trouble believing it.

But my ways of dealing with it, when I end up not wanting to feel sad about it, is imagining that other person being as happy as happy could be. Otherwise, it's pretty hard for me to come up with a bright side.