Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) How to play Brawl like a man - What is manly? Before I teach you how to play Brawl like a man, it's important to make one distinction: Playing like a man has actually nothing to do with being a man. That's right. There's nothing to do with the dangling parts you may or may not have. Some of the manliest people I know...are actually women. The question some of you may be asking at this point is, "Why would I wanna play like a man"? This, of course, is a stupid question and you should feel bad for asking it. I'll answer it anyway... Let's take the example of the casual gamer and the hardcore gamer. The casual gamer, takes a game home, beats it and then abandons it thinking there's nothing left to it. The hardcore gamer, pushes his play to the furthest limit but he quickly finds his competetive spirit that leads to hurt feelings and strained relationships with his friends. Playing like a man seeks the middle-ground between these two. A follwer of the way practices restraint while pushing his skills. By practicing these restraints, the gamer manages to keep this simple innocence the casual gamer enjoys while keeping the thrill of the competetive spirit. When you lose to a manly gamer, there are no hard feelings, only laughter and fun. Like everything, man-fighting has rules: The 12 rules 1. Finish with a bang. - No matter the skill of your opponent, they deserve to be finished in a cool way. This means always following your opponent to the edge of the stage for a finishing blow. Letting your opponent die with a flashing finish is to dishonor them. 2. Manliness before victory. - This is the most important aspect of your play. Even more important than victory. As such, it logically follows that self-destructing and killing an opponent in a cool way is more important than actually winning the match. The second you concentrate on winning rather than manliness is the second you lose the match. 3. Repeat, don't spam. - A manly player will immediately identify it's character's manliest move. Make note to use them often. It's not unusual to see a manly player throwing a Falcon Punch 3 or 4 times in a matter of 10 seconds. However, a manly player does NOT spam. Using Fox's laser ten times in a matter of a few seconds is spamming (Fox is not manly), and therefore not manly. 4. Melee over Range. - Hitting an opponent with melee over range is always manlier. 5. Never attack during a taunt. - Men don't attack during an opponent's taunt. To do so is to give power to the taunt. The exception, of course, is during any of Sonic's taunts ("I'm too slow, but you're too dead"). 6. Fight your own battles. - A man fights his own battles alone, and finishes his opponents. Don't let anyone finish an opponent for you. This also includes minions of your characters, so this means no Waddle Doos, no Toad, no pokemon, and defeneatly NO Pikmin. 7. No Johns. - A real man makes no excuse for being a man. When you lose a fight like a man, you lose. You do not lose BECAUSE of fighting like a man. 8. Don't take unfair advantages. - A real man fights with skill. He will not use his skill to take an unfair advantage on his opponent. Doing so is not manly. 9. Don't touch the Hog. - Wario loves his bike. He worked for years to build his bike. Destroying his bike is just a low blow. 10. Violations mean death. - Violating a man-rule intentionally or unintentionally requires the player to self-destruct (See Rule #12), for only then, honor can be regained. 11. Find your own path. - No too-manly players play alike. In order to be a true man, one must find his own way of playing. Don't copy others, a world without vary is unmanly. 12. No Marth. - This one needs no real explanation- Just NO Marth. Knowing the rules in no way makes you a manly player. But by taking the spirit and not just a word of these rules to heart, you can eventually reach that play. There are, however, exceptions to these basic 12 rules. Except 12#- Seriously, no Marth. Keep practicing and one day you too will be able to play like a man. Edited May 7, 2011 by Soul Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
someonewhodied Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 er. I guess tomorrow I can kick you around some. Haven't touched ssbb in forever though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Good matches earlier, aside from the lag of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I don't know and I haven't played Brawl in forever. ...but I'm still gonna dig it up today now for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zanarkin Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 ... I have no wi-fi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fenrir Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 manly HELL YEAH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I am a manly player except when I use Marth? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 I am a manly player except when I use Marth? Unfortunately. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 5. Never attack during a taunt. - Men don't attack during an opponent's taunt. To do so is to give power to the taunt. The exception, of course, is during any of Sonic's taunts ("I'm too slow, but you're too dead"). People who taunt...get hit. Anyone who taunts...I kill them first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I am Brawl like man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Tarrasque Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) Block and counter. Raven's familiar with how effective this has been. Edited May 7, 2011 by Sirius Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) 8. Don't take unfair advantages. - A real man fights with skill. He will not use his skill to take an unfair advantage on his opponent. Doing so is not manly. 12. No Marth. - This one needs no real explanation- Just NO Marth. 8. Turn off the damage meter...problem solved. Though, if you watch how far someone flies, it's easy to tell who has the most damage. 12. This is a terrible rule. Edited May 7, 2011 by Hatari Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emeraldfox Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Soul, your rules are as retarded as a walrus with down syndrome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightmare Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 He got this from somewhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 12. This is a terrible rule. Well, from an unmanly player, it's easy to say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Well, from an unmanly player, it's easy to say. ...How is marth worst than say Peach?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ansem Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 I don't see anything wrong with Peach. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) I don't see anything wrong with Peach. * sigh * oh well. Edited May 7, 2011 by Hatari Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 You can come here and tell me you changed your mind anytime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 You can come here and tell me you changed your mind anytime. Nope. Marth is far superior than peach. If you're stupid enough to taunt during a match, you're stupid enough to get hit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ansem Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 i taunt after i knock someone out of the stadium Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 I taunt after I knock them out of the stage and kill them. /Very stupid move Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatari Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I taunt after I knock them out of the stage and kill them. /Very stupid move ...some taunts don't end by the time they recover and can play again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkhead Posted May 7, 2011 Author Share Posted May 7, 2011 But the black guy's taunt ends quickly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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