Pokemon Emerald- Starter Solo

[BBM]

So I'm going to be playing through my favourite game with ONLY my favourite starter for company, because all these playthroughs have inspired me. I will take you along the ride and try to be funny, but I'm not good at it. I will be using only Treecko, except for HMs. This will be difficult in some parts, so any advice when I'm stuck is appreciated!

Let's go! Up to May!

So when we have them fight each other, that's fun? Good to know...

I thought we hacked this game and put all the info on a site?

I find it weird playing with names other than my own. Don't stalk me gaiz!

It was degrading and I won't be objectified further!

Iunno, I have a feeling I won't be here for very long...

So I get a clock as a replacement for my dad? Well, okay... he's balding anyways. I set the clock, and then upon the urging of my mother, visit my family friend May!

How is this relevant to the chitchat? What a non-sequitur... But then she blows me off after a minute! How rude! I leave her house in a huff and decide to go north.

But I don't have a pokemon either and those wild cries are scary! Okay, I guess I'll just check it out quickly... but I get there and the guy won't let me go. I guess I have to help him!

No need to stretch buddy, it'll be over soon. I destroy the Zigzagoon and I follow the guy to this lab, where he starts thanking me.

A what now? I mean, I know I'm incredibly gifted, but my vocabulary isn't very extensive! Haven't you noticed that I haven't even said anything yet? But then he gives me my own pokemon, which is awesome. I name him...

Yeah, it's my default start name. Don't know why...

Nah, I don't really feel like it dude, she kinda blew me off last time.

Fine, only for you Birch, since you gave me my very own Wood Gecko. I g decide to go north to Oldale and I'm feeling kinda hungry, so I go up to this guy in an apron and ask for food:

But it turns out he sells drugs instead:

But I'm a good kid, so after taking the free drug sample because he shoves it into my bag, I run away north until I see May. She wants to battle, but I don't even take any pictures because it's so easy except for the part where Torchic got a crit and I had to use my free drug sample on CrazyRohan.

Whew, uploading all those pictures took me an hour... and it wasn't helped by the fact that I accidentally deleted this post first time around and had to write everything again...

[Raven]

I use photobucket for all my image upload needs as of late. You can upload all images in a file in bulk and save you a lot of time, and keep them organised too.

[BBM]

Thanks, I'll keep it in mind!

[AMCC4728]

Good luck with Winoa and the twin gym leaders(can't remember their names.)

[BBM]

TBH, I'm more worried about Flannery than Tate+Liza. Sceptile has SE Leaf Blade on 3/4 of their pokemon.

[BBM]

And now, up to Roxanne!

I start my journey as a trainer, moving west from Oldale. I'm just walking, minding my own business, but I get a rude crash course to the harsh realities of pokemon training!

This is injustice! How dare you take away my freedom? This is like my mom making me ride in the moving truck! I'm a human, with rights! So, I make a vow to defeat this corrupt Pokemon League and do away with these rules. Several more steps, however, and I arrive at my first true test:

dat Taillow... Luckily, my journey does not meet an impromptu end so early, and I go back to heal because I'm cautious like that. I arrive at Petalburg. I heal Treecko, and decide to keep going, when I am once more rudely accosted.

Damnit, how do all these trainers know? Is it something I'm wearing? He forces me to go visit my jerk of a dad, who forces me to go tag along with some kid while he catches a Ralts. I come back and he won't even face me! Grr... As a Gym Leader, he is an official of the Pokemon League, and has probably been corrupted by the Champion! I will free you, father! Later!

On my way out, I'm stopped again (seriously, Emerald does this a lot).

It is my clothes! I keep going now, and soon enough:

Yay, Quick Attack! This will be useful for all those enemies Treecko doesn't outspeed! Wait...

Nifty boat. Too bad I can't take it...

I raise my hopes for a minute, deceived by the politeness she shows. Unfortunately...

I have to battle her anyways. Those tricksy feminine wiles! I then head into Petalburg Woods. My first enemy is a Bug Catcher:

All those pokemon! He must be a worthy opponent!

No, they were all Wurmples... Anyways, I continue onwards, and run into a guy in a suit. Finally, someone with good fashion sense! Unfortunately, a guy starts attacking him. Naturally, he gets scared:

Only because you're wearing a suit, man!

A pirate! IS HE THE OWNER OF THAT NIFTY BOAT!?!? ...Probably not, he loses too easily. He runs away, closely followed by the suit guy. I keep walking, and run into my nemesis, Taillow. But:

I continue, and run into this guy:

After that, I see something weird-looking:

So those are trees that can be cut, huh? No wonder Hoenn has no lumberjacks! I move past the trees, and out of Petalburg Woods. I pick up, the Bullet Seed TM, which I immediately teach to Treecko. At worst, it's 20 power, the same as Absorb, and at best, it's 50, which is pretty good. I also pick up the Wailmer Pail. Moving on:

I test out Bullet Seed:

Bullet Seed da bomb. I move past the lame fisher with 3 Magikarps, and into Rustboro. After healing, I take the advice of that guy in Petalburg who told me to go straight to the Gym. I enter, and after a few battles:

Then, I fight Roxanne, which can be summed up by:

Oh yeah! Actually it was kinda annoying because of those Potions, but shh...

[AMCC4728]

Flannery was never as difficult as everyone said when I starter soloed with treeko. just have plenty of super potions. I hate tate & liza because on a solo you have 2 v. 1 which makes it very difficult because 2 pokemon are attacking you at once.

[BBM]

Lololol I almost lost to a Tentacool just now. That toxifusion!

[Espinosa]

Flannery was never as difficult as everyone said when I starter soloed with treeko. just have plenty of super potions. I hate tate & liza because on a solo you have 2 v. 1 which makes it very difficult because 2 pokemon are attacking you at once.

Overheat is a bit too much to take, though.

[sunshineYON]

Flannery is definitely one of the most threatening gym leaders in the series. That Torkoal with Overheat, Body Slam and Attract wrecks things more than Whitney's Miltank, at least in my experience.

[BBM]

Up to Brawly! In this installment, I face my hardest challenge yet! A Tentacool!

After beating Roxanne, I leave the Gym, only to see the pirate from earlier running away, followed very slowly by the guy in the suit. I go heal CrazyRohan, and then head north to see what's up.

Okay, I'll help you just because you complimented me. I head east, picking up a Super Potion on the way and fighting my way through the Trainers. Notable things include getting paralyzed by a Shroomish's Effect Spore and CrazyRohan not giving a damn. I move on and see an old guy looking out of place.

Sounds like our pirate. I venture into the cave, where I am attacked by a Whismur. Does anyone else think these things look like babies who've just been born? All pink, ugly, and crying. I see the goon, and engage.

So his pokemon gained two levels and mine gained 5 and evolved. I think there's a clear winner here.

So this guy's the owner of that ship? Lame... Heading back...

ITT wild Poochyenas try to set up on me by taking advantage of CrazyRohan's paralysis. Doesn't work.

Rub some dirt on it. I return to Rustboro, and am teleported to Devon Corporation, where I am given a mission, if I choose to accept it:

I say yes, because

This is what you give as a gift, Dad! Not a clock! On my way out, we get a glimpse of the laboratories where they make Pokeballs, PokeNavs, and a whole bunch of other high-tech stuff:

...Seems legit. I explore the city, and see:

Naturally, to prevent him from killing himself, I go in, but it turns out he cuts trees, not himself. And now that I've gotten my clothes dirty by going in a Cave, he recognizes me as an expert trainer and gives me Cut. I don't teach it even though it's stronger than Quick Attack, because the Move Deleter is all the way in Lilycove. Fuck that. Next up, I fight May. Torchic has both Ember and Peck, but May doesn't have brains, and decides to tell it to Focus Energy, so:

I now exit Rustboro, and pick up Lasses and Rich Boys.

That's a great reason to give someone your phone number. Heading forwards, I decide to go visit Mr. Briney, who shows his thanks appropriately:

On the way, I get a call from my Dad.

How many Dads do I have? Anyways, I reach Dewford. A decision now awaits me. Should I fight Brawly or deliver the letter to Steven? I decide on the latter, and face the local competition.

However, his pokemon are very competent!

My first taste of toxifusion! But I SHALL PREVAIL!!

Toxifusion OP. I use my Super Potion, but two turns later:

BUT I STILL PREVAIL. I go back and heal, and face the next guy, who also has a Tentacool. But this time:

Aww yeah. Into the cave! This guy gives me Flash and insults me at the same time:

Fool! I don't need Flash!

...The Gym it is. WTF I CAME HERE BECAUSE I WAS SCARED OF THE DARK! This guy tries to comfort me:

My first opponent:

If I waited for a couple seconds, would she fall down?

...

...

She doesn't. Later on into the gym, I meet this guy:

Mr. Briney must have lost a lot of muscle mass in his old age. I beat more trainers, and notice something for the first time. All the female trainers have Meditites, and all the male trainers have Machops and Makuhitas (except Brawly). Who says sexism doesn't exist in Pokemon?

Then I get to Brawly.

Machop: SOFT

Meditite: USES FOCUS PUNCH EVERY TURN, ALLOWING ME TO HEAL WITH ABSORB

Makuhita: ...beats me twice.

Seriously, he wouldn't have been difficult if that fucker Tentacool hadn't made me use my Super Potion. But on my first attempt, Vital Throw was a 2HKO after a Bulk Up even if I used a Potion. Grovyle also hit only twice with Bullet Seed every time. On the second attempt, he gets a critical Vital Throw after a Bulk Up, which is a OHKO. On the third attempt, he decided to start Vital Throwing without Bulking Up , meaning I could survive 3 hits if I used Absorb in the middle and had CrazyRohan hold an Oran Berry.

FINALLY.

[BBM]

Up to Wattson! CRAZYROHAN LEARNS LEAF BLADE!!!!

With my shiny new Knuckle Badge, I return to Granite Cave. Then, I check Serebii and realize that all pokemon who can learn Flash are deeper into the cave. So I have no choice but to battle my fear and descend into the darkness. Dun dun dun... A few steps in:

I catch my first HM whore! He can learn Cut, Strength, and Rock Smash. I name him...

I keep going, and 2 steps before I reach the end portion of the cave, which is lit, I meet a Sableye. >_>

Fuck you. I beat the now useless Sableye and go meet Steven.

Well, I don't know who you are exactly, but thanks! I Escape Rope out, and return to Petalburg to all those places with Cut that I forgot to visit. On the way, I get a call from Roxanne.

Maybe you should. Then, I get into my first double battle, which I can no longer avoid because I have two pokemon.

I just have MetalWhore use Harden, and luckily no one attacks him. Then,

Just so I don't have to catch one way later when I get access to Fly. I get into another double battle. The pokemon may be weak, but they are fierce opponents!

Dat confusion. Seriously, I can't wait til I can get that Flute. Anyways, I pick up Miracle Seed, which I give to CrazyRohan, and EXP Share, which is useless, and go to Slateport.

I try.

inb4 Team Aqua member.

Anyways, I go into the city of Slateport. On the way to Capt. Stern, I see lots of pirates outside a building, but don't do anything. I go into the Shipyard.

At least tell me where he is! I exit and see all the pirates have left the area. SEEMS SUSPICIOUS. I go into the museum, where I am punished for my heroic attitude.

Inside, I reform hardened criminals.

I go upstairs, and fight some chumps.

Wait, so does that make me Shaggy and CrazyRohan Scooby? Win. I meet the leader, Archie (who is not the guy from the comics OR the old guy on the seaside. I am disappoint.) Outside:

Maybe? There are no doubts!

For some reason, I always find this really funny. Anyways, HEADING NORTH:

Gamefreak, this is not PG.

Gamefreak, little kids on the beach without shirts is okay. Grown men without them is not. Anyways, I go into the Trick House because I want to get Leaf Blade before fighting May.

I bet this guy inspired the HIMYM writers.

Other way around. On the Low Road, I see May:

Time to be a stalker.

Heh heh heh... Also,

Why the fuck does she keep calling me a rookie if she's not so good at battles! Anyways, Grovyle is like 10 exp off from Leaf Blade before having to fight Combusken, which is really dumb, but as always, Combusken's Focus Energy is the MVP, and afterwards:

FINALLY. SCREW YOU BULLET SEED.

CANDY, PLEASE. No, it's an Itemfinder. Aww...

Even random mooks recognize the awesomeness of my pokemon!

How is this appropriate gear for cycling?

wynaut

Yes, it's about overthrowing the corrupt government! In Mauville Gym, I face the normal bad Electric Gym puns:

Why the hell are there Gulpins in an Electric Gym?

Wasn't very difficult dude, I had to step on like one switch. My Gym battle goes something like this:

Voltorb: Leaf Blade

Electrike: Leaf Blade

Magneton: Leaf Blade

Thunder Wave

Cheri Berry

Shockwave

Leaf Blade (crit)

Manectric: Leaf Blade (crit)

GG.

[Venusaur]

Oh man, this takes me back. I actually soloed Sapphire with a Mudkip. No, not a Swampert or a Marshtomp, a Mudkip. Mud Sport saved me during that 3rd gym! And then when I got to Rayquaza it one-shotted me, even when I was Lv. 70something.

[The_Purple_Knight]

Doesn't every 8 year old do this ? God knows i did when i was kid . Swampert was always the easiest to solo with .

[BBM]

Up to Flannery! Another evolution, and the most anticlimactic battle ever.

But I don't know how to ride bikes.

I wonder if GF knows how sexual some of these things sound, and does it on purpose...

what

Where Grovyle gains more Speed than HP.

I think this guy makes fun of himself.

This is like my mom's joke, where she says says if "do" is pronounced "doo", why isn't "go" pronounced "goo".

I thought the bad electricity jokes would end when I left Mauville.

Thanks for complimenting me, but you don't have to insult the route north of Mauville!

I know the character I've set up in this playthrough would take the interview, but I really hate giving the interview.

Do those lunges.

Thanks.

Now. What is the purpose of this place? There is no hidden item here, and no Secret Base spot, or anything.

That looks kinda wrong...

1v3 what a boss. Then I fight Maxie. Midway through the fight, I learn Slam. I replace Quick Attack with it, and then it misses three times in a row. I facepalm on chat, and Horace reminds me of Strength, and then I facepalm in real life because I've had that since right after Mauville...

Then, Flannery. WAS SO EASY. I thought it'd be difficult, but I took 17 damage... I OHKOd her first three pokemon. Then Torkoal came out. I used Strength, Torkoal used Attract. I used Strength again, she used Sunny Day. Then, I was immobilized from Attract, and I was like OH SHIT SUNNY DAY + OVERHEAT. Then she uses BODY SLAM. I finish next turn with another Strength. That battle was actually easier than freaking Roxanne! At least she kept using Potions to stall! At least Wattson made me use a Cheri Berry! Flannery just FAILED. I'm disappointed in you, Flannery!

[Venusaur]

Doesn't every 8 year old do this ? God knows i did when i was kid . Swampert was always the easiest to solo with .

Well, I didn't evolve Mudkip at all the whole time.

[AMCC4728]

Then, Flannery. WAS SO EASY. I thought it'd be difficult, but I took 17 damage... I OHKOd her first three pokemon. Then Torkoal came out. I used Strength, Torkoal used Attract. I used Strength again, she used Sunny Day. Then, I was immobilized from Attract, and I was like OH SHIT SUNNY DAY + OVERHEAT. Then she uses BODY SLAM. I finish next turn with another Strength. That battle was actually easier than freaking Roxanne! At least she kept using Potions to stall! At least Wattson made me use a Cheri Berry! Flannery just FAILED. I'm disappointed in you, Flannery!

What did I tell you.