Thor Odinson Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) In this case, it's hard to go without personal anecdotes. I'd prefer mathematical proofs myself, but it's not a situation where I can just derive a few equations and prove him wrong. Wish I could, math makes shit easier for me unless it's a long-ass difficulty upped by 120% take-home test. Edited March 3, 2012 by Luminescent Blade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Defeatist Elitist Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 In this case, it's hard to go without personal anecdotes. I'd prefer mathematical proofs myself, but it's not a situation where I can just derive a few equations and prove him wrong. Wish I could, math makes shit easier for me unless it's a long-ass difficulty upped by 120% take-home test. What I mean is that you'll notice when people said "this shit is different in Asia parents their are actually overbearing" Iced admitted he didn't know enough about the situation and backed off a bit, so I guess what I'm saying is that he responded better to that. I dunno, does that make sense? I'm hungry as fuck right now so maybe my brain just isn't working. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor Odinson Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) Fair enough, then. Though I also know Sona's parents, and especially the father, is very overbearing. This I can vouch for since I've known her since high school and she's the one who even got me into FE. So the response, I feel, is also justified. I'm probably one of the Asians who's lucky enough to have fairly supportive parents (they were willing to let me go into art if I wanted to. I chose to go into computer science because art schools have crap for math.), but I've know enough friends (all Asians) who have similar stories, as they complain to me about how their parents just told them they were "worthless", or "failures", for getting something lower than an A+. It might be a stereotype on Asian parents, but it's pretty fucking true a good portion of the time. So people who are more personally affected by Iced's assumptions, I feel, are justified to reply back. The rest of the comments against him seem to be more based on him assuming white knighting when he doesn't even read the reply. then again idk if I'm making sense either since I'm trying to work on that aforementioned math test and thinking about goddamn vector spaces as I type this so lol Edited March 3, 2012 by Luminescent Blade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Death' Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Fair enough, then. Though I also know Sona's parents, and especially the father, is very overbearing. This I can vouch for since I've known her since high school and she's the one who even got me into FE. So the response, I feel, is also justified. I'm probably one of the Asians who's lucky enough to have fairly supportive parents (they were willing to let me go into art if I wanted to. I chose to go into computer science because art schools have crap for math.), but I've know enough friends (all Asians) who have similar stories, as they complain to me about how their parents just told them they were "worthless", or "failures", for getting something lower than an A+. It might be a stereotype on Asian parents, but it's pretty fucking true a good portion of the time. So people who are more personally affected by Iced's assumptions, I feel, are justified to reply back. The rest of the comments against him seem to be more based on him assuming white knighting when he doesn't even read the reply. wait wait wait. So you know that this is common for asian parents. Yet you still offered to adopt him? And suggest that he leave his parents (who probably love him but like most asian parents show it in a weird way)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor Odinson Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) Some Asian parents don't love their kids, that's the thing. I don't want to name names, and if person wants to bring him up, it's their call. It's commonplace, but it ain't make it right. As I've said earlier and I'll make it more clear this time, it's one thing to have high expectations, but it's a dent on the child's self-worth and self-image to be called worthless and failure, and thus they'll just end up performing worse. Many Asian parents want to mold their kids into something they aren't and is just too forceful, but what if the kid just can't excel at the subject? What if the parents want the kid to be a lawyer, but the kid wants to be a physicist? Now that Joshie says his mom's better about it and being more understanding now, I'm more or less joking about the adoption thing, but I don't think a kid should be forced to hear his parents call him a "failure" just because he can't get A pluses in everything. If my parents did that to me, I might not even be functional. There's a limit on how much I can do about my shoddy English grades (Asian standards anyway, I had Bs in English and As in everything else so they aren't bad by normal standards, but the stereotypical Asian parent would flay me for it) since English to me is like math to those people who just can't do math. Edited March 3, 2012 by Luminescent Blade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Death' Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Some Asian parents don't love their kids, that's the thing. It's not okay when Iced makes assumption about JB's situation but it's somehow okay when you make assumption about JB's parent's situation. okay! lol I was gonna do more commentary on your post but what's really bothering me. Is that when you get older and as your parents get older, you really start to appreciate them. And I used to think my parents were out to make my life miserable, but the truth is they're human too and they make mistakes sometimes. Parents aren't perfect. You don't really think they denting their child's self-worth and self-image or making them perform worse intentionally, do you? That's the problem with demonizing his parents straight away. According to you his mom is more understanding now than he thought. That's really awesome. And goes to show that you can't automatically jump to the conclusion that they "don't love their kids" or whatever else you said. idk it's just a really tough job and I guess this is going into personal insecurity territory, but this is the reason I would hate to be a mom some day because I can't stand the idea of loving someone that much and having them hate me like this. haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Death' Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 AKA we don't know enough about the situation and most of this thread is ridiculous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor Odinson Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) I suppose you have a point, but my position stands in that "worthless", "failure" etc should not be something parents ever say to their child unless they commit some horrible wrongdoing. And again, I will not mention names, but the person's parents I'm thinking of did things that goes a lot further than just calling this person worthless, etc and...it goes far beyond even what the Asian standard of chastisement is. For that, I no longer think just because people are parents, that they are loving. Parents should be loving, but sometimes they just aren't. Also why wouldn't you adopt Joshie he's fucking adorable and I would gladly rent my room to him if he goes to uni around where I live and I moved out by that point now this is serious I need money to pay my rent if I move out haha Edited March 3, 2012 by Luminescent Blade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iced Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) White knighting? God, Iced, how fucking dense can you get You know nothing of Joshie's background you don't talk to him on a regular basis and now you're spewing bullshit assumptions based on your own sheltered-ass life GET OUT Jesus Christ, calm down, I had already backed off and she wrote a good thousand words which included adopting people and <3 you guys. I'm not trying to incite any hate here,just giving my impressions from one glance, if I'm wrong that's fine. I'm pretty sure he couldn't be assed to read an argument backed by facts from personal experience and went the asshole route. Apparently providing defense for a friend whose moral character was attacked by an idiot while I don't need to look good to others on a forum where I'm relatively well-liked regardless is white knighting. Too bad that was improper use of the word, since I'm not looking to get laid as I have a dashing boyfriend to sleep with already. <3 'facts from personal experience' Oh lord. I'm not attacking anyone's character, not once did I say that he wasn't a nice person or smart, but that isn't what we were arguing about. Also I couldn't care less about how well-liked you are and how many boyfriends you have. Edited March 3, 2012 by Iced Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor Odinson Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) Well then read the goddamn thousand words before you call it white knighting or not. It takes 3 minutes tops. And you may not care, but it does go into play on how you used the term white knighting incorrectly. Edited March 3, 2012 by Luminescent Blade Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.M. Gei Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 (edited) Jesus Christ, calm down, I had already backed off and she wrote a good thousand words which included adopting people and <3 you guys. I'm not trying to incite any hate here,just giving my impressions from one glance, if I'm wrong that's fine. 'facts from personal experience' Oh lord. I'm not attacking anyone's character, not once did I say that he wasn't a nice person or smart, but that isn't what we were arguing about. Also I couldn't care less about how well-liked you are and how many boyfriends you have. you know there are times when it's probably a good idea to keep your mouth shut, lest you look like that one guy who wet his pants in public this is one of those times Edited March 3, 2012 by Black★Rock Shooter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anti-Social Meta Knight Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 A girl? On the Internet? I gotta take this bitch down a notch. Oh, you. :3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nanami Touko Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Oh, you. :3 No you~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sakusa Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 You probably deserved it if your parents really called you a failure. Sometimes you need to actually wake up and stop being so self entitled. Totally not an attack. I'm sure Aurora's parents do love and support him normally, but it would take quite a lot for a parent to call their son a failure, there comes a time where 'You can improve' just doesn't cut it anymore. Sometimes you have to actually be told these things and take a look at yourself rather than constantly blaming the world. Be cruel to be kind and all that jazz. Almost not an attack, but forgivable, since hopefully he's learned that people call their children failures when they commit the greatest failure of not obtaining a perfect score. Respect goes deeper than simply telling your children what they want to hear all the time. He may not like his parents at the moment, everybody goes through phases like that, but I'm sure that they think this is ultimately for the best. I agree there may have been a lighter way to put it though. Fair enough. I'm only going off what I've been told, I have no idea what his situation is really like. To me it sounds like this has been an on-going thing, you have to be able to change yourself before you can try to change things around you. Being treated like a failure is certainly never a good thing in any aspect, but being told these things can force you to face up to your problems, be it school or whatever, and work towards fixing them. Regardless, I'm not going to continue to argue a point when none of us have any information; it's really not fair to Aurora. If he made this thread looking for help I'm sure the people here will try to give him some good advice providing he gives some details about his situation, but at the moment it just looks like he's using it to vent his frustration and get sympathy. Nothing wrong with that either if he's angry. I gave information that was ignored and passed off as white knighting. 'Kay. Jesus Christ, calm down, I had already backed off and she wrote a good thousand words which included adopting people and <3 you guys. I'm not trying to incite any hate here,just giving my impressions from one glance, if I'm wrong that's fine. 'facts from personal experience' Oh lord. Unfortunately, the only way to know about shit that goes on in families is through personal experience. Whether you believe it or not is all up to you. I'm not attacking anyone's character, not once did I say that he wasn't a nice person or smart, but that isn't what we were arguing about. Also I couldn't care less about how well-liked you are and how many boyfriends you have. They called him a failure, so he must be a failure, right? It's not attacking his character to call him a failure. I mean, they already called him one, so it's just the truth, right? Logic is fun~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleph Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Really with this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Defeatist Elitist Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 whatthechrist Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ansem Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 Thanks for calling me a fucking failure to my face twice in two days. Thanks for pretty much saying I'm too retarded to even get into a local university. Thanks for implying my grades will continue to get worse. And thanks for threatening to pull me out of everything I worked my ass off to get last year, everything which I told you I wanted to be in so badly. Finally, thanks for not being supportive. You don't need to say you're welcome. My parents are pretty fucking terrible too. Sometimes it seems like they'll do anything for you except let you be yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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